{\rtf1\ansi\ansicpg1252\deff0\deflang1033\deflangfe1033{\fonttbl{\f0\fswiss\fprq2\fcharset0 Arial;}} {\colortbl ;\red0\green0\blue255;} \viewkind4\uc1\pard\nowidctlpar\qc\f0\fs24 In Alice\rquote s Wonderland III\deleted\par \pard\nowidctlpar\qj\cf1\revised\deleted0\par \par \cf0\revised0 I would have passed by the house if Jennifer hadn\rquote t known which one it was. All the houses in our 1950\rquote s development were just about the same. The Kowalski and mine across the street were built to the same plans. Even Tony Martin\rquote s, the next block over, was the same type of house, different colors but still the same style. Knowing how small my back yard was I couldn\rquote t imagine someone installing an in-ground pool. The front yard needed cutting but that was to be expected. After all he was arrested for molesting his teenage daughter and her friends. I don\rquote t think I\rquote d want to be out much either. Then there\rquote s the fact that most likely he\rquote d just given up after his daughter was taken from the house.\par \par It almost felt like I was walking up to my own home. The front door was a little different but the bell sounded the same when I rang. I looked down at Jennifer. Her hand was clutching mine. She was wearing more of the clothes that Alice had bought her. A plaid schoolgirl skirt that was longer than the one that Alice had given her that first night, and a light blue blouse. On the drive over here she\rquote d started playing with the buttons. She was getting nervous. \par \par Jennifer had every right to be nervous, I\rquote d asked her the night before how she\rquote d come to know Rennie Martin. After all Rennie was fourteen to Jennifer\rquote s\rquote seven. It seems that the Martin\rquote s and Kowalski\rquote s shared the back fence. If Jim or Lois Kowalski went out for the day Mary would go over to the Martins house. It was one of those visits that Jennifer met Rennie for the first time. All of this was just before Mrs. Martin left and moved to Texas. \par \par After that Jen went over on her own as Rennie and her father became closer. Finally during last summer Rennie told Jen that she was the woman of the house. Jen didn\rquote t know what that was, so she said she was too. After some more talking Jen realized that Rennie meant she was sleeping in the Master bedroom with her father. Jen couldn\rquote t match that so instead she absorbed everything Rennie told her. That is until someone in Rennie\rquote s circle of friends found out and the manure hit the revolving cooling device, as they say.\par \par \par I kept wondering to myself why I\rquote d volunteered to take Jennifer to the Martin\rquote s in the first place. I could have just said no, but being Jennifer she would have sneaked over while I was at work. She had all day today to do it. She decided not to go to school today. I wasn\rquote t sure if it was what happened in school or that she\rquote d had her first hangover. Bev said she could stay home the day before so she did. \par \par I thought I saw the blinds covering the living room window move. But even before I could knock the door opened. There he was. The last time I\rquote d seen Tony was years ago. He joined the Army out of high school and did his four years. When I went to my ten-year class reunion someone had said he was back and working up the road in Clayton. I ran into him that first year Jennifer came to stay. He looked pretty good then, just older. Then again we all were older.\par \par Now he looked really bad. It looked like he hadn\rquote t slept in a month. He hadn\rquote t done very well in the hygiene department either. He just stood there and looked at Jennifer and me, mostly Jennifer.\par \par \ldblquote You know you shouldn\rquote t be here.\rdblquote That was directed to me. \ldblquote I think my neighbors are keeping a eye on me and letting the cops know what I do and who I see.\rdblquote\par \par I guess because Tony was talking to me, Jennifer thought that she was being ignored. \ldblquote Hi Mr. Martin. Do you remember me?\rdblquote Her head was pointed straight up at Tony.\par \par He looked down at her and gave what I guess could be called a thin smile. \ldblquote Of course Jennifer, I remember. How y\rquote all doing?\rdblquote Tony had that down east accent from his parents.\par \par \ldblquote Pretty fair. I\rquote m going into fourth grade next year wif\rquote Mary.\rdblquote \par \par It was amazing watching the two of them talk. I\rquote d been trying to teach Jennifer to talk without the accent I grew-up with. She started out pretty good because Linda was from up north. Still she could slide into her North Carolina accent at the drop of a hat.\par \par His smile became a little wider. \ldblquote That's great. So, do you like school? It should be ending soon?\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Next week then I don\rquote t haf\rquote ta go back till August. Gene is taking me to Myrtle Beach again this year. The motel\rquote s got a real nice pool but I don\rquote t use it much. All I gotta do is walk down the steps to the ocean.\rdblquote Jennifer kept a holding on to my hand.\par \par \ldblquote Rennie and I...We use\rquote ta go to Carolina Beach out by Wilmington every summer.\rdblquote The smile faded at the mention of his daughter\rquote s name. \ldblquote What can I do for y\rquote all?\rdblquote Now he was looking at me.\par \par \ldblquote Jennifer wanted to know how your daughter\rquote s doing,\rdblquote I replied. \ldblquote I thought I should come along seeing as you\rquote re out on bond and all.\rdblquote He didn\rquote t flinch or show any emotion at that. He really didn\rquote t seem all that much different from any other father.\par \par \ldblquote That was a real fine idea you had.\rdblquote There was no anger in his voice, just resignation. \ldblquote I can\rquote t be seen with any unsupervised child till I go back to court this summer. It still may be rough on you though. If the cops find out who you are and where you live they might pay you a visit. Actually I haven\rquote t been able to talk to her since Social Services took her away.\rdblquote\par \par I felt Jen\rquote s hand tighten around mine at that.\par \par All this time Jen had been looking at Tony. \ldblquote We ain\rquote t going to tell them nothing Mr Martin. Rennie tol\rquote me that was what got you guys in trouble.\rdblquote\par \par Right then it hit me. Bev said Rennie was at her grandparents in Alabama and Jennifer said her mother was there. I lightly squeezed her hand, just to get her attention. \ldblquote Jen? When did you talk to Rennie?\rdblquote\par \par She dropped my hand and looked at both of us. \ldblquote She called the house one night after they took her away. I wanted to tell you, Gene, but Rennie made me promise. We talked about a lot of things. Rennie said her mom moved from Texas and was living at the house.\rdblquote Jen turned to face Tony Martin. \ldblquote She\rquote s not happy Mr. Martin. It\rquote s worse now than before. She can\rquote t talk to you, ya know? Like you guys did before.\rdblquote\par \par I thought Tony had had a heart attack. He just dropped to his knees in front of my Jennifer. \ldblquote What did she say? I\rquote d really like to know Jennifer. I\rquote m sorry she has to put up with her cheating...\rdblquote\par \par Jen seemed to think it over. Either that or she was so surprised at Tony\rquote s actions it stopped her cold for a moment. \ldblquote Her and her...\rdblquote Jen looked up at me.\ldblquote Rennie said a lot of bad words Uncle Gene. She was really mad.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote That's okay Jen.\rdblquote I wondered how bad it could be. \ldblquote Tell Tony everything she said.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Well...\rdblquote Jennifer closed her eyes as she told Tony everything. It was like she memorized the whole call. \ldblquote Her mom came from Texas, where she was living, and started running her life. She can\rquote t go anywhere without her being there. Rennie said she might haffta run away. And she will, in a New York minute. What\rquote s a New York minute?\rdblquote Her eyes opened again. Jennifer was looking at Tony. I was just a spectator for now.\par \par The smile returned to Tony\rquote s face. \ldblquote It\rquote s sorta like in a heart beat. Like when Gene says you better come to supper in a heartbeat or he\rquote ll toss it in the garbage. I don\rquote t know were Rennie picked it up but she uses it a lot.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Oh! Anyway, she said if she did she\rquote d go to Gabriella\rquote s house. Rennie said you knew where she lived. You could find her there.\par \par \ldblquote Anyway her and her mom are fighting all the time. She said her and her bitch of a mom...\rdblquote Jen looked up at me. I didn\rquote t say anything so she continued. \ldblquote ...Got into a hellova fight one night. She told Rennie she was lucky you didn\rquote t knock her up with a bastard child. What\rquote s a bastard child?\rdblquote\par \par I knew now how bad it could be. \ldblquote Just finish telling Tony what you remember, Jen. I\rquote ll answer all your questions later\rdblquote Jennifer nodded.\par \par \lquote Ya,\rquote I thought. \lquote If I don\rquote t have a heart attack on Tony\rquote s front step.\rquote\par \par So Jennifer closed her eyes and continued. \ldblquote Rennie laughed at her and told her that was the one thing she wanted. Then she said that you wouldn\rquote t give her a baby of her own. You made her get the pill? What\rquote s the pi... Sorry, I forgot.\rdblquote\par \par I looked down at Tony Martin. He was absorbing every word. Every now and then he\rquote d nod his head like he was at a prayer meeting. Tony broke the silence. "That\rquote s okay, Jen.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote She said, she thought really hard about flushing the pills in the toilet but she knew that you\rquote d be disappointed if she was big as a house so she didn\rquote t. Her mom got really mad. Rennie said she was really pissed off. She got all red and everything. Then she hit Rennie real hard.\par \par \ldblquote Rennie said her mom just jumped all over her. Her mom called you a child molester and pervert and Rennie a slut for taking you away from her. Rennie called her a slut back for sleeping around on you in the first place. She tol\rquote her that you guys didn\rquote t start up till she left. Then Rennie said none of this wouldn\rquote t of happened if she\rquote d kept her legs open in her own bed and her ass in church like she was suppose to. Well I guess that tore it.\par \par \ldblquote They really went after each other. They broke a lot of stuff in her grandparents\rquote house before the police came. But they still hate each other and cuss each other out all the time.\rdblquote\par \par Jen opened her eyes and looked at Tony. \par \par \ldblquote The worst is school. She hates it there. Everyone knows why she\rquote s there and what she did. The boys are really bad. They touch her and ask her to do things but she keeps say\rquote n no. The other girls won\rquote t talk to her cause the think she\rquote s stealing their boyfriends. She\rquote s got no friends. The teachers won\rquote t do anything cause she has this reppatation?\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote It\rquote s reputation, Jen.\rdblquote\par \par Jen ignored me and kept on. \ldblquote She really wants to finish school then come back here. If you can\rquote t she\rquote ll go live with Gabriella but she may haff\rquote ta get a...GED? I don\rquote t know what that is, Mr Martin. She\rquote s real smart. She could be anything. I told her that and she said all she wanted was to be with you and have your babies.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Rennie said she couldn\rquote t call you and she could only call me this once. She misses you.\rdblquote\par \par At that Tony stood up. \ldblquote Thank you so very much. I can\rquote t call there and it\rquote s just tearing me up. I\rquote m sorry that my daughter has to go wade through all this shit on account of me.\rdblquote His eyes were back on me. Tony looked like he was having a hard time getting a hold of everything Jen had said.\par \par I looked at Tony and saw a small piece of what I must have looked like when Jennifer went with her mother last month. Just a lost look, plain and simple. I knew then that if someone took Jen away I\rquote d be just as lost. And she wasn\rquote t even my lover.\par \par Tony looked at me with those empty eyes. \ldblquote Gene? Can I ask you some questions? If they\rquote re too personal I\rquote ll back off.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Go ahead, Tony.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote When Jennifer has friends over do you look at them...well...like you look at her?\rdblquote There was no shame in his asking, there was no doubt. He kept looking at me waiting for a response.\par \par I wondered what he was getting at. \ldblquote I guess not, Tony,\rdblquote I said. \ldblquote There\rquote s Mary and a few others but no I don\rquote t. They\rquote re just kids.\rdblquote\par \par Tony smiled at both of us. It was a sad smile but still a smile. \ldblquote That's the way we started, me and Rennie. She was my best friend before she shared my bed. I know they\rquote re trying to say I had sex with a lot of her friends but there was only one other. That was Amie. It was just a couple of times and she\rquote s a really sweet kid. I wasn\rquote t her first. There had been others. She was, and probably is still my biggest defender. She\rquote s been trying to find out who told but... well you know how it is.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote It was Becky Ann, Mr Martin.\rdblquote Jen told us. \ldblquote Rennie said her parents are trying to force her to tell the police you did it with her. She doesn\rquote t want to lie about you because you didn\rquote t do anything to her. All you did was listened when she had problems at home.\rdblquote Jennifer reached for my hand. \ldblquote Rennie tried to call you and tell you but her mom caught her with the phone.\rdblquote\par \par Tony looked back down at Jennifer shook his head and smiled. \ldblquote You really did talk to her a long time? I bet her grandparents are going to be mad when they get their phone bill. But I do appreciate it, both of you. Could I give you guys some advice?\rdblquote\par \par Jennifer just nodded her head as he continued. \ldblquote Keep what you\rquote ve got secret. Don\rquote t tell anyone what y\rquote all doing. Even if it\rquote s as simple as a kiss. Don\rquote t tell even your best friend, Jennifer. One day you and your friend will have a fight and she\rquote ll say something that will hurt you and Gene, to someone else. That's what happened to me and Rennie. The wrong person found out. The other thing is, Gene your going to have to find yourself a girlfriend...\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote I\rquote m his girlfriend,\rdblquote Jennifer cut in.\par \par \ldblquote I know you are Jen. I can see it in your faces. You\rquote re holding hands like Rennie and I used to. But he needs someone his own age to go out with. People will say that it\rquote s just not right to be with a child all the time. Those people will talk.\rdblquote When Tony was finished he looked at me. \ldblquote Y\rquote all understand?\rdblquote \par \par Everything Tony said made sense. I thought back to some of the trips we\rquote d made to go shopping. We held hands sometimes and laughed at things like we actually were boyfriend and girlfriend. \ldblquote Ya I do. Even Mary\rquote s mom said it was good when my ex-girlfriend came back for a visit last month.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote That was another mistake I\rquote d made. I didn\rquote t want someone else. I just wanted to be with my daughter. People noticed and the rumors started.\rdblquote Tony looked around and shook his head. \ldblquote You better go now. The police swing by the neighborhood a couple of times a day now. I don\rquote t want you to have the same problems I have.\rdblquote\par \par I didn\rquote t see how Jen and I would have problems. I liked her a lot but in my mind I couldn\rquote t see us like Tony and his daughter.\par \par \ldblquote Mr. Martin?\rdblquote Jennifer was looking up at him again.\par \par \ldblquote Ya\rquote Jen?\rquote\par \par \ldblquote Do you have Rennie\rquote s phone number? If she can\rquote t call me anymore maybe I can call her.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote I think she\rquote d like that a lot, Jennifer. And could you tell her that I still love her and it was my fault for everything?\rdblquote\par \par Jens beautiful hazel eyes looked into his. Then she looked at me. \ldblquote Sure Mr. Martin. I can do that.\rdblquote\par \par I got the number from Tony and drove around the block to the house. We didn\rquote t say anything on the short trip.. I didn\rquote t know about Jennifer but I should have told Tony that our relationship wasn\rquote t anything like the one he had with his daughter. \par \par I should have said that our relationship wasn\rquote t sexual but plutonic. And it wasn\rquote t even exclusive. Well, thinking about that \lquote little\rquote kiss it really wasn\rquote t sexual but it was sexual. Shit, I didn\rquote t even get hard during the kiss. As far as Alice and Sunny went, I had two adult girlfriends or lovers and more sex in the past month than the last three years. But then again Jennifer was still my girlfriend even if she didn\rquote t want to be my boyfriend. I was starting to get a headache. \par \par We pulled into the driveway and I shut off the car. The silence was helping the pounding in my head. I turned to the other side and there was Jen looking at me. \ldblquote What is it?\rdblquote I asked.\par \par \ldblquote I dunno Uncle Gene. Thanks for taking me over to see Mr. Martin. It\rquote s really sad to see both of them that way. Think Rennie and her father will get back together?\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote I don\rquote t know, Jennifer. I really don\rquote t know.\rdblquote I wanted to tell her more but for some reason I couldn\rquote t.\par \par \ldblquote Have you ever felt like Rennie\rquote s Dad?\rdblquote \par \par It was out of the blue. Did Jen really think we had the same kind of relationship? Still looking at her hazel eyes I couldn\rquote t lie. \ldblquote When your mom came home from a trip and took you to her place I sort of felt like Tony. Saturday morning I poured your orange juice and got everything ready for watching cartoons. Then I realized you weren\rquote t there. It was empty, the house, me, everything. I sat on the couch all day. I didn\rquote t do anything till Alice called and told me to come get you. Ya, I have Jen. Except you\rquote re here now with me and Rennie can\rquote t be with her father.\par \par \ldblquote Abandoned.\rdblquote Jennifer whispered to herself.\par \par \ldblquote What? You weren\rquote t abandoned. Where did you get that from?\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote One of the kids in my class\rdblquote , Jen\rquote s voice was still a whisper. \ldblquote His mom and dad leave him alone a lot. His grandma tries to take care of him but she\rquote s old and forgets a lotta stuff. He lives in a big \lquote ol house by hisself. He told me and Mary that sometimes he cries all night. Kinda like what I did when my mom left me that day.\rdblquote\par \par I really didn\rquote t know what to say. She was right, of course. From her point of view her mom and dad did abandon her. In almost three years they hadn\rquote t visited Jen more than a couple dozen times. But she did talk to Linda every couple of weeks or so on the phone.\par \par \ldblquote You know Linda loves you even if she\rquote s not here?\rdblquote I hoped that would be enough. \par \par Jens eyes looked into mine. There was sadness there. \ldblquote She has a book, Gene. It\rquote s just like yours and my name is in it.\rdblquote\par \par All I could do is stare. \ldblquote Your name is in my planner too.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Do you have my birthday written down?\rdblquote The tears were forming in her eyes.\par \par \ldblquote No. I do have our vacation days, PTA and meetings with teachers and stuff. You were born on the fourth of July. That\rquote s easy to remember.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Mom has it written down. I saw it. It\rquote s in the middle of a three-week trip to Canada. She\rquote s not going to be here for my birthday, again. I read everything in her book.\rdblquote As she told me one tear started to fall. \ldblquote It doesn\rquote t say \lquote go to Surfside Jennifer will be there for her eighth birthday.\rquote It doesn\rquote t even say \lquote get Jennifer a present\rquote or a card or anything. She even had supper written in when I was there. She writes more about going with Bruce than me. It\rquote s like I\rquote m one of her stupid meetings.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Jen?\rdblquote I don\rquote t know why I even tried but I had to salvage something out of their relationship. \ldblquote I know Linda isn\rquote t a great mother. I know her work and everything means less time for you but she does care about you.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Ya right.\rdblquote The sarcasm in Jen\rquote s voice was so thick you could have cut it with a knife.\par \par I reached out and put Jennifer\rquote s hand in mine. She was shaking like the proverbial leaf. \ldblquote I\rquote m serious Jen. She\rquote s tried her best to do what was good for you. Two years ago she could have just sent you to her parents\rquote house in Minnesota. Instead she LET YOU stay here with me. The other week she could have taken you away with her. Even with you screaming at her, you would have been gone. There wouldn\rquote t have been anything I could have done about it. She is your mother. I\rquote m only your uncle.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote You\rquote re my boyfriend.\rdblquote Jennifer started concentrating on my hand holding hers.\par \par \ldblquote Am I?\rdblquote \par \par Jen shook her head. \ldblquote I don\rquote t know Uncle Gene.\rdblquote\par \par There it was again, Uncle Gene. \ldblquote Do you want to go out for supper or burn a couple of TV dinners at home?\rdblquote I needed to change the subject and the tone.\par \par My little girlfriend was still looking at our hands. \par \par \ldblquote Maybe later, okay? I\rquote m going to school tomorrow. Mary brought me my homework. I gotta get it done.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Sure Jen.\rdblquote\par \par XxXxXxX\par \par \par \ldblquote Uncle Gene? Could you come here? I\rquote ve got a problem.\rdblquote\par \par I got up from the couch and walked back to Jennifer\rquote s room. I knew the school had to give the kids something to do for the last couple of days before summer vacation but full-blown homework? I tried to help Jen as much as I could but they seemed to be shoving more at them earlier. I had to smile to myself as now I\rquote d have to relearn fifth grade all over again after just graduating from third.\par \par I pushed open the door and saw Jennifer sitting on her bed staring at me. I wondered why she wasn\rquote t doing her homework.\par \par I stood in the doorway looking back at her. \ldblquote What do you need Jen?\rdblquote Her eyes never wavered. I remembered a sports phrase. She had her game face on. Only, to her, it wasn\rquote t a game.\par \par \ldblquote Could you please sit here?\rdblquote Jen patted the bed next to her.\par \par I\rquote ve been in situations before when the small hairs on the back of my head stood up. Usually when trouble was headed my way. Now not only were the hairs on my head were standing up but all down my back down to my toes. This was not good.\par \par I went into her room. She didn\rquote t move as I sat next to her. As I settled down she put her little hand on mine. She was looking down at the floor. Her brown hair was pulled back in a ponytail.\par \par \ldblquote Okay Jen let\rquote s talk.\rdblquote I knew I wouldn\rquote t like it. \ldblquote You first.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Uncle Gene?\rdblquote I could hear her hesitate. I\rquote d done that a dozen times before talking to Jen. Afraid to speak and say the wrong thing.\par \par \ldblquote I don\rquote t want you to go to jail,\rdblquote she continued. \ldblquote I don\rquote t want it to be my fault.\rdblquote\par \par In the seconds that took and the minute before she spoke again I said, \ldblquote Jennifer I\rquote m not going to jail. And even if I do it won\rquote t be your fault. You didn\rquote t do anything wrong.\rdblquote\par \par I don\rquote t think Jennifer heard me. She was too busy trying to get out what was inside her. \par \par \ldblquote Mr. Martin said,\rdblquote she continued, \ldblquote that the time he and Rennie had together was worth the years he\rquote d be in jail. He said they would be together again, some day. No one, nothing, could keep them apart. Is that true?\rdblquote She looked up at me.\par \par I could feel tears starting to form in my eyes. Her eyes were getting that glassy look as a drop formed in the corner of her eye. \ldblquote If you truly love someone as much as Tony says he loves Rennie, yes it would be worth it.\rdblquote\par \par Then she asked the question I\rquote d hoped would never be asked. \ldblquote And you and me?\rdblquote Her eyes were filling fast. Of course mine were getting a little bleary as well. \par \par I closed my eyes as I said, \ldblquote I told you no matter what you\rquote d be my girlfriend. You can love more than...\rdblquote the tear drops squeezed out of my eyes and down my cheeks\ldblquote one person but you can only...\rdblquote I heard her whisper.\par \par \ldblquote be IN love with one,\rdblquote we finished.\par \par \ldblquote And that\rquote s you Gene Fredrick McGuire.\rdblquote As my Jennifer said that my eyes popped opened. Did I really hear what I heard?\par \par \ldblquote And I love you Jennifer Marie McGuire, I always will,\rdblquote I whispered. What else was I to say?\par \par She stared at me. Then she took my hand and stood up. She tugged at my arm until I was standing in front of her at the side of the bed. She sat back down on her bed, still holding my hand. \ldblquote Gene could you please kneel down?\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Jen this isn\rquote t such a good idea. Even if you are my girlfriend again I can\rquote t kiss...\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Please be my boyfriend again?\rdblquote\par \par I was lost and I knew it. I knelt at the side of the bed, my face directly in front of hers. I didn\rquote t want to give her another \ldblquote little\rquote kiss. I was getting scared and confused.\par \par My sweet Jennifer took my hands and turned them over. Slowly her fingers traced little circles in the palms of my hands. \par \par I started to get dizzy. She was going to give ME a \lquote little\rquote kiss. My seven-year-old was going to do to me what I\rquote d done to her a few weeks back. Triple shit didn\rquote t begin to cover it.\par \par \ldblquote You don\rquote t have to do this, Jennifer.\rdblquote Part of me actually wanted to believed that\par \par Her eyes locked on mine. \ldblquote Shhhh. Gene, I want to. Could you do something for me?\rdblquote My own words were coming back to haunt me.\par \par I looked at her face. It was calm. No fear no doubt. It was then I realized that it had been a while since I\lquote d seen her like that. She was always on the edge. Not knowing if Linda, her mother, would scoop her up and take her back. Someone would find out about the attraction we had for each other. Or even worse I would find someone else and leave her alone. Mr.Martin and the talk in the car had really gotten to her.\par \par \ldblquote Stay the way you are.\rdblquote My words from before came back to haunt me. \ldblquote I\rquote m still a kid but one day I\rquote ll catch up and really be your girlfriend.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote It\rquote s a date,\rdblquote I replied. Maybe when I\rquote d said that to her it really wasn\rquote t BS after all.\par \par I started to lean in towards her face. Jennifer pulled back slightly. Now what? Were there second thoughts? Her fingers never stopped making little patterns on my palms.\par \par \ldblquote I want to do this Gene. It\rquote s my kiss, okay?\rdblquote Her hazel eyes looked deep into mine.\par \par \ldblquote Okay.\rdblquote\par \par Jennifer leaned in and I felt her lips touch mine. She dragged those soft lips across mine; side to side and back and forth. The dizziness was getting worse. It was the most thorough kiss I\rquote d ever had.\par \par I felt my pulse in my ears. It was almost as if I could hear my own heart beat. Not the normal heart beat but this was almost like cannons going off, but fast like a machine gun. I could hear her breathing. It sounded as if Jen was gulping for air but I felt little puffs of air on my mouth as she kept up light pressure on my lips. Her breath was warm and smelled sweet.\par \par It took all my willpower not to grab her and give her a very wet kiss. I forgot she was my niece or that she was seven years old. It was so bad my tongue was twitching. I thought, \lquote How the hell did Jennifer and Alice stay still when I did it to them?\rquote\par \par Just when I thought I\rquote d have to break her kiss there was a new sensation. I felt it between the feather light caress of her lips and the pounding in my ears and the warmth as Jennifer continued to stroke the palms of my hands.\par \par I was getting an erection.\par \par Actually I\rquote d had an erection and it was still growing. Some where between her taking my hands and getting lost in her kiss I\rquote d gotten hard. Now I was getting very hard. I wanted to adjust myself but Jennifer still had my hands. I felt my penis lying along my leg. \par \par The little moan coming from Jennifer\rquote s lips broke the spell. But I felt that moan on my lips and it traveled all the way down to between my legs.\par \par \lquote Not now\rquote , I thought. \lquote Not this way\rquote , my body wasn\rquote t listening to anything I was saying. My ears continued to listen to our breathing. I felt her moaning, as she became lost in the \lquote little\rquote kiss. \par \par Somewhere during this kiss her voice became deeper. Only then did I realize I was moaning and gasping for air as much as she was. I felt that familiar tingle as every fiber in my body wanted release. \lquote No not now, wait!\rquote was running around in my head. The problem was my body wasn\rquote t listening.\par \par I was wondering when Jennifer would break the kiss. If she did that I might not have to explain why I\rquote d cum in my pants. The kiss continued until suddenly she leaned back. The noise that our lips made was only made all the louder by the silence between us. I looked into her hazel eyes and smiled.\par \par Suddenly Jennifer launched herself off the bed and into my arms. Her small arms wrapped themselves around me as her head came forward. Her lips crashed into mine head on. \par \par It was no \lquote little\rquote kiss. It was a full blown mashing of lips kiss. How we didn\rquote t hit our noses was beyond me. Jen continued to press her body against mine. A small soft, very warm body. \par \par I groaned. The warmth coming through her clothes was starting to make me sweat. I felt that old feeling rising to the occasion and I couldn\rquote t stop it.\par \par I suddenly felt another spot of warmth as I came. It had no where to go but coat my leg and my slacks. One, Two, Three spurts... \lquote Hell,\rquote I thought, \lquote if I don\rquote t stop it\rquote ll run into my shoes!\rquote \par \par I know it\rquote s stupid but I started to laugh. Jennifer broke the death grip she had on my neck and looked at me. \ldblquote What\rquote s the matter boyfriend?\rdblquote\par \par I was just grinning at Jen like an idiot. \ldblquote I think I just melted into my shoes.\rdblquote\par \par The look on her face was priceless as she looked down and saw the dark stain on my slacks. It seemed like she had difficulty looking back up into my eyes. Suddenly she started laughing. \par \par \ldblquote Did I do that?\rdblquote There was a mix of wonder and awe in her voice.\par \par \ldblquote No, I did but you caused it.\rdblquote I could feel my cum already cooling against my skin. I really didn\rquote t want to move but I had too.\par \par \ldblquote Is that how boys do it? Wow, that\rquote s really neat!\rdblquote \par \par \ldblquote Jen? I...?\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote What Gene?\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote I\rquote ve got to go to the bathroom; now!\rdblquote I really needed to take care of my problem.\par \par While I found it humorous when she said it, Jennifer on the other hand found it funny beyond belief when I said it. Her laugh, at my expense, had her flopped back on the bed holding her stomach and gasping for air.\par \par With all the dignity I could muster I walked to my bedroom and did a quick rinse in the shower and changed into my sweats. I tried very hard not to think about what had just happened.\par \par I flopped down later on the couch. Television wasn\rquote t what was on my mind as I sat there. I closed my eyes as my mind raced over the possibilities. Did my seven-year-old niece just seduce me? I still didn\rquote t want her in my bed but that \lquote little\lquote kiss was probably the most erotic thing that had ever happened to me. What would Jennifer expect from me now? Part of me knew it couldn\rquote t happen again. Even though I wanted a repeat of that incredible experience.\par \par Finally I heard Jennifer come in the living room. I felt her pillow on my lap as she assumed her usual position for watching TV. I looked down at the back of Jen\rquote s head as she stared at the television. She hadn\rquote t said a word.\par \par I was about ready to say something when she asked.\par \par \ldblquote Gene? Why are we watching channel four? You don\rquote t like ETV.\rdblquote\par \par I opened my eyes to what the Educational station out of Chapel Hill was offering. But I didn\rquote t want to get up with Jen in my lap. It must have been left on some program Jennifer was watching. They had a lot of children's programming in the afternoon.\par \par \ldblquote I really don\rquote t want to get up, Jen. If you want to change it go ahead.\rdblquote\par \par Instead of answering me she turned over on her back. \ldblquote Did you like what we did?\rdblquote\par \par I looked down at her face. There was a little of the worry I\rquote d seen before coming back. \ldblquote Yes, yes I did, very much girlfriend. Did you?\rdblquote\par \par There was a little smile on my Jennifer\rquote s lips. \ldblquote It was okay boyfriend. Not as good as when you kissed me. That was super.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Super?\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote You know, great, fantastic, amazing.\rdblquote The smile on her face was getting bigger.\par \par \ldblquote I think it has to do with the kisser and kissee thing. The one getting kissed has more fun.\rdblquote\par \par Jen kept looking at me. Somewhere during our talk I started stroking the side of her head. \ldblquote That feels good Gene,\rdblquote Jennifer said.\par \par \ldblquote It feels good to me too, Jen.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Do you want a girlfriend, Gene?\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote You\rquote re my girlfriend, remember the little talk we just had?\par \par \ldblquote No I mean a real girlfriend. A grown-up girlfriend.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Why would I want that? That kiss you gave me was pretty good. By the way I didn\rquote t jump all over you and mash lips like you did. What was that all about?\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote That\rquote s how Alan showed me how to kiss. Did you like it?\rdblquote\par \par I looked in her eyes. I wondered how I ever got so busy that I didn\rquote t notice her insecurities before. \ldblquote I loved it. Alan\rquote s kiss was pretty good. A surprise but it was good.\par \par \ldblquote I didn\rquote t like it as much as when Alan and I did it. Could you show me how you and Sunny kiss?\rdblquote\par \par Well just damn, I thought. \ldblquote I don\rquote t think so. Other people might see and there would be trouble for us, for sure. Besides what will we do when you get all grown-up and we\rquote ve done everything?\rdblquote I hoped to derail that real quick.\par \par \ldblquote I supoze.\rdblquote Why was she still looking at me.\par \par \ldblquote What?\rdblquote \par \par \ldblquote You should ask Sunny to be your girlfriend. I know she would, ya know. She really likes you.\rdblquote \par \par \ldblquote That's not how adults do it. It takes time. Besides I think she knows you\rquote re my girlfriend.\rdblquote\par \par \ldblquote Oh! Well you\rquote re going to have to play that you guys are boyfriend and girlfriend. Rennie didn\rquote t want her father to go out with anyone else and now they\rquote re not together.\rdblquote\par \par I slid my hand along the side of her face to just under her ear. My little girlfriend tilted her head just enough to trap my hand there. I really didn\rquote t want to move so I closed my eyes and listened to the TV going on and on about some thing. \par \par In another few hours Sunny would call from Miami. What would I tell her? The more I thought about it the more I wanted summer to come. Summer was always a great time for me, no worries and no surprises. The past month was full of surprises, good and bad. I was really getting too old for this. Heck I was almost forty.\par \par As I dozed off I thought about the carefree summer while my fingers stroked Jennifer\rquote s neck.\par \par I dreamed about Sunny and all the possibilities. I needed to know when she\rquote d be back. Then I wondered how I got so damned lucky to have three beautiful women in my life. If I\rquote d been a little more awake I probably would have realized that I\rquote d just put Jennifer in the same category as Sunny and Alice.\par \par Anyway there was always time for a nap before supper.\par \par \par \par \par \par \par \par \par \par }