Pepper stepped out of the trailer and stretched, once he was free of its confines. It was false dawn and the light was just bright enough to see his surroundings clearly, while still giving everything a soft appearance. The dew on the ground gave the grass a delicate appearance, like something out of a fairy tale. There was just enough of a chill in the air to make him wish he was still in bed.
The whinny of a horse drew his eye to the south end of the pasture. Looking at them brought back the memory of their charge into the pasture. A yearling broke away from the main herd, and started bucking. Pepper smiled while watching the young animal feel its oats.
A movement at the far end of the pasture drew his eyes. For a second he wondered if there were two herds of horses, until he realized that the animals weren't horses. He strained to see them better, but without luck. He didn't know enough to determine if they were deer or elk. The low light and distance didn't help. It didn't matter to him that he didn't know they were elk, it was the first time he had ever seen a herd of wild animals. There were over twenty of them.
He watched the animals for a minute, until nature called too strongly for him to ignore any longer. He shuffled over to the outhouse to relieve his morning bladder. This was the same outhouse that stood over his 'practice' hole. Sam said that it was the Cadillac of outhouses since it included a sink as well as a seat and a urinal. The sink used water that was stored in the two-gallon tank that was attached to the all above the sink. It had to be refilled from the stream.
Pepper stood at the urinal wondering what people back in Los Angeles would say about him using an outhouse. Outside of the smell and the occasional breeze on his butt, he found the experience to be similar to using a regular toilet.
Thinking of the song, he muttered, "If they could see me now."
Feeling much more relaxed after finishing his business in the outhouse, Pepper went outside. He walked over to the bridge that they had been building for the past four days. When Donny had said that they were going to be building a bridge, he had assumed that it was going to be something like a little pedestrian bridge. He was wrong. This was a little wider than a two-lane road. It had stringers made of poles the diameter of telephone poles. Sam said that it had to be that wide to allow a 'combine' to cross the stream.
Donny looked over the bridge feeling something that he had never felt before — pride in building something. Even now that it was nearly done, he had trouble at times believing that he had actually helped build it. He had helped cut the poles to size, built the cribbing on both ends of the bridge, helped place and secure the stringers, and then nailed the flooring in place. Throughout the work, Sam and Carl explained why they were doing things the way they were being done. Much to Pepper's amazement, he actually understood what they had done and why.
Pepper had learned a lot over the past four days. He had used tools that he knew existed, but had been mysteries to him. He could now start and operate a chainsaw. He knew how to check the oil, sharpen the cutting teeth on the chain, and adjust the cutting bar. He had learned how to use a drill with an auger bit. Sam had even patiently showed him how to use a hammer to drive nails into wood. He had learned how to attach a choker cable to a pole.
One of the most important lessons that he learned was about safety. Sam and Carl emphasized safety in everything they did. They never did anything without checking and double-checking the situation for possible hazards. They would tell him where to stand and what to watch for. Nothing was done until everyone knew what they were supposed to do and what everyone else was to do.
Each time Pepper would start to rush, one of them would say, "The hospital is three hours away."
He even had to dress to be safe. He wore leather gloves to protect his hands, safety glasses to protect his eyes, and safety boots to protect his feet. The boots had been a surprise. Donny had dropped them off at the bunkhouse the morning he was to leave for the trailer. There had also been five work shirts, three pairs of blue jeans, a package of socks and a package of underwear. Rather than a cowboy hat, he wore a cap with the name of a tractor company on it. Donny had left before Pepper had a chance to thank him.
Pepper heard the trailer door open and close behind him. Sam asked, "Are you still looking at the bridge?"
"Yes," Pepper said. "I can't believe I helped build it."
"We'll put up the handrail this morning and pack up the trailer this afternoon. We'll be back at the bunkhouse in plenty of time for dinner," Sam said.
Pepper asked, "Why are we staying in the trailer rather than the bunkhouse?"
"Basically, we would kill about an hour each way if we drive over here in the truck every day. We were here for five days, and that would mean we would lose about a day's worth of work. Next week we'll be putting in a gate in that fence on the other side of the stream. We'll have to cut down some trees, to create a road to the field. When all is said and done, living in this trailer puts us at the job site," Sam answered.
"I thought we were taking the trailer back this afternoon," Pepper said.
Sam said, "No. We're just cleaning it up for the next folks who use it."
"Won't you be using it?" Pepper asked.
"Probably, but you never know," Sam answered. "We'll pick up the dirty linens and towels and replace them with clean ones. We'll make sure all the dishes are washed and put away dry. Of course, we'll check the inventory of the staples and mark down anything that is getting low. We'll have to take all of the perishables with us. You'll need to pack up your stuff to take back to the bunkhouse."
"I didn't realize it was so much work," Pepper said.
It seemed to Pepper that everything was a lot more work than he imagined. It also seemed that no matter how much work they did, there was always more work to be done.
"It won't take long with the three of us working together," Sam said.
Pepper said, "I'll help however I can."
Sam looked down at the far end of the meadow and said, "The elk are leaving."
"Those were elk?" Pepper asked.
He could see the herd disappearing into the trees. It was amazing how quickly one of the animals could disappear on entering the woods.
Sam nodded his head and said, "Elk are bigger and heavier looking than deer. It is a magnificent animal when you get a chance to see one up close. They've got huge antlers that sometimes reach four feet from base to point. When you look up at the top of the antler, you're looking up at something that is nine feet above the ground. They weigh four or five times what you do so don't try to pet one. You'll be in a world of hurt."
The animal life out here was another source of lessons for Pepper. He had come upon a skunk one afternoon. Fortunately, he froze in place far enough away that the skunk didn't feel threatened. He was still near enough to smell the animal. He now understood what it meant to smell like a skunk. He had also observed a beaver swimming through the stream. The animal actually had a flat tail although he had thought that was a myth of cartoons. Sam had explained that it had a dam further down the stream. He had also seen a bobcat catching a mouse.
Sam said, "If we've got enough time, we just might get to do a little fishing."
"Great," Pepper said.
In the evenings, Sam and Carl spent their time fishing until it got too dark to see. Carl had loaned Pepper his gear and taught him how to fly fish. It wasn't until the third night that he finally caught a little trout. It had thrilled him more than he thought possible and he was quite disappointed when he had to throw it back.
Sam headed for the outhouse. Carl stepped out of the trailer and looked around. He spotted Pepper over by the bridge.
He said, "You're still looking at the bridge."
"Yes," Pepper said.
Carl looked at the mountains in the distance. He sighed and said, "I can look at those mountains all of the time. This is truly God's country."
Pepper said, "I guess it is."
"When I was a young buck, right out of high school, I figured that the last place I wanted to be was in the country. I wanted to see the world so I joined the Navy. I saw the world alright, and I mean that quite literally. I spent eight years in the Navy going from port to port with lots of water between ports.
"I worked on a cruiser in the Pacific Ocean. We went to Japan, Singapore, Hong Kong, Taiwan, India, and parts of the Middle East. I saw all of those places. When I was ashore I would check out all of the sights. I went to Buddhist temples in four different countries. I saw historical sights of all kinds. I walked through buildings that were two thousand years old. I saw landscapes that were ugly and some that were kind of nice.
"I met people of all different cultures. I learned about Hindus, Buddhists, Muslims, and people belonging to a few religions that you probably never heard of. I saw people of all different classes. I had sex with a fuck bunny in a Thai whorehouse. I had tea with a Buddhist monk. I saw palaces where men lived like kings. Mostly, I saw real poverty in a lot of those places.
"I was about to reenlist when we stopped in Hong Kong. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, that is a thoroughly modern city. It has skyscrapers with traffic jams that could compete with San Diego at rush hour and win. I was walking along and found that I was in a less than luxurious neighborhood. To be quite blunt, it was an ugly dirty place. I was standing there surrounded by people jabbering in a language that I didn't understand. All of a sudden it hit me; I didn't like the life I was living.
"I had been searching for something. It dawned on me that I would get somewhere, and ask myself if this was the place for me. None of the places I visited even came close. I'd look for mountains and there wouldn't be any. I'd look for lush green meadows, and all I would see was swamp, concrete, or dust. I'd look for forest and all I'd see were buildings, jungle, or desert. Nothing grabbed me by the heart and said that I belonged there.
"I didn't realize it, but I was comparing every place I visited to here. I was looking for wide-open spaces, lush woods, clean running streams, mountains in the distance, and blue skies overhead. I missed the sounds of birds singing in the trees, elks bugling in the early morning, the babbling of a brook, and the wind in the trees. None of the places I had been, had it all. Nowhere could compare to here.
"I came back here with eyes that could compare what was here to the rest of the world. The rest of the world came up short. I haven't left, since," Carl said.
Carl's monologue had made Pepper feel uneasy. He had never had another man tell him what was in his soul before and he didn't quite know how to respond to it. People didn't talk like that in the city. There was a superficial friendliness where people would exchange civil greetings and talk about the weather, but they didn't share their hearts. There was a façade of sophistication that had to be maintained at all times.
He said, "I'm glad you found your home."
Carl looked over at Pepper with a sad expression.
He said, "I feel sorry for you. You've been out here and it has changed you. I've seen you look around and appreciate the glory of your surroundings. You've seen and done things that you never imagined. Having experienced it, you're going to miss it, when you return to Los Angeles."
Pepper looked at Carl as if he didn't know what he was talking about. Carl said, "Don't look at me that way. You know it is true. This land has reached into your chest and touched your heart. God has blessed you, and cursed you, with this visit out here.
"It is the subtle things that are going to tug at you. You'll open up a bottle of pine scented cleanser and then realize that you know what a real pine scent is. You'll look at the sunlight reflecting off a building and remember the light on the mountains. One day you'll hear a rumble and it will remind you of horses running freely across the field. You'll never be able to order trout in a restaurant without remembering the one you caught here.
"You'll get back to Los Angeles, and it will be a lesser place than it was when you left it. Your life will be a little emptier. The people will seem a lot shallower. The glamour of city lights will pale in comparison to the stars of a country night. The chrome displays in the malls will look monochromatic compared to the diversity and subtlety of the colors of nature. When you sit in your empty apartment, you'll miss the peaceful and quiet solitude that is possible here.
"You won't fit in Los Angeles anymore. The good Lord knows you don't fit in out here. In a way, I think Donny bringing you here was the worst possible punishment one man could inflict upon another. He took you from your old life and let this countryside strip away the artificial glamour that made your home attractive to you. You don't belong there, you don't belong here, you don't belong anywhere anymore.
"I feel real sorry for you. I spent eight years looking for a home before I found it. You'll spend the rest of your life searching for a home, and you'll never find one."
"I can't believe that," Pepper said.
He looked down at the stream and noticed how the light danced across the ever-changing surface. He looked at the trees seeing the diversity of colors. They weren't green. They were a thousand shades of green, and gray, and brown, and silver, and too many other colors to even mention. A shiver went down his spine.
Hearing a noise behind them, Carl said, "Sam is finally out of the outhouse. It is my turn now."
Pepper watched Carl head off to the outhouse. The conversation with the man had unsettled him a lot more than he wanted to admit. He wondered if it was true that his short time out here had changed him so much.
He turned to look at Sam, and asked, "Who is making breakfast today?"
"It sure as hell isn't you," Sam answered.
Usually the first man to use the outhouse in the morning had the job of making breakfast. It was the price of not having to wait for the others. Carl and he had come to an agreement that rule was waived when it came to Pepper.
He said, "I never had eggs that tasted so rubbery as what you made the other day. I can't even imagine what you did to them."
"I'm sorry. I'm not used to cooking over a stove unless it is to heat a can of soup. I usually use the microwave," Pepper said defensively.
Sam said, "I don't see how a man can possibly eat nothing except frozen food. I ate one of those frozen burritos once. It gave me the shits for a week."
"Some things are better than others," Pepper said with a grin.
He'd the same experience with frozen burritos. However, it was also true that they were used to much better quality food here on the ranch. He figured that most of them would consider diner food to be cheap, filling, and basically tasteless.
"I'll be glad to get back to Mrs. Daniels cooking. That woman is a wonder in the kitchen," Sam said.
"I'm looking forward to eating her cooking, too," Pepper said.
Sam said, "I guess I'd better get to making breakfast. We'll be having bacon and eggs again."
"I'm not going to complain," Pepper said.
He watched Sam go into the trailer. He turned back to the bridge to examine it.
Over breakfast the three men discussed the work to be done that day. The tasks that had to be completed were identified and responsibilities allocated. Pepper enjoyed that time of day. He used to tune out the breakfast discussions back at the ranch house. It wasn't until coming out here that he realized how many things were decided over breakfast that affected him directly. He paid attention and contributed when he could. A frequent topic of conversation was the limitations placed upon what he could do as a result of the bar and chain. He wasn't too good at fetching and carrying. The bar limited how much he could carry and the chain limited how fast he could move.
When breakfast was over, Pepper stayed behind in the trailer to wash the dishes. Joe and Carl went about getting everything set up for the day's work.
Pepper didn't mind that particular task although it was a bit more work than back at home. Out here he had to heat the water before doing the dishes. He had come to accept that life was a little more primitive in the country, but that primitive wasn't necessarily worse.
One of the biggest surprises to Pepper had been bathing. He had expected some kind of shower in the form of a bucket with holes in it. He had been shocked when Sam and Carl stripped and waded into the stream. The two men had laughed, joked, and splashed each other before settling down in the water to soak. Seeing two men naked like that had struck him as a gay kind of thing.
It had taken him five minutes to work up the nerve to strip off his clothes and follow them in the water. The stream was only about two feet deep in places, but the water was frigidly cold. Pepper's experience with water in the outdoors had been four trips to the beach, and infrequent visits to apartment swimming pools. The ocean with its powerful waves had been a little frightening. He had only waded along the shore where the waves washed across his feet. Soaking in a fast moving stream was a new experience for him. In fact, it was one of the most pleasant baths of his life.
Pepper dried the dishes and stacked them in the cabinet where they belonged. Once he was finished, he picked up his bar, grabbed the chain, and made his way out of the trailer. Sam called him over to where he was setting up to cut the wood for the hand railing.
Sam pointed to the set up and explained, "I've set up a jig so that we don't have to measure each board. You'll take a two by four from that stack of boards over there and put the end of it flush against that piece right there. You'll hold the board solidly in the jig. Once you've got it held firm, I want you to say okay. Don't say 'okay' until you have the board held firmly in place. Otherwise, one of us could get hurt.
"I'll cut the board once you say okay. You'll need to keep holding the board firmly in place. When I finish cutting the board, I'll say okay. That lets you know that I've finished the cut, and you can stack the board over there. Got that?"
Pepper nodded his head and said, "Yes. I've got it."
"Great. We're going to be cutting wood, so you're going to need to wear your leather gloves and the safety glasses," Sam said.
There were times over the past week that he felt like he was explaining things to a six year old child. In terms of experience around tools, Pepper was a child. It was hard to remember that sometimes.
Pepper put on his leather gloves and safety glasses. He picked up the first board and put it into place. Sam looked over and said, "That's right. Now hold it down."
Pepper held the board in place. Once he was sure that he had a good grip on it, he said, "Okay."
Sam cut the board and said, "Okay."
"That was easy enough," Pepper said picking up the board.
He put it where Sam had told him to start the pile. It didn't take them long to work through the pile of boards.
The men worked through the morning putting together the railing for the bridge. When they finished, Carl stepped back to appreciate a job well done.
Satisfied, he asked, "How does it feel to have built your first bridge, Pepper?"
"Pretty good," Pepper said, immensely proud of his contributions.
It was the nicest looking bridge that he had ever seen. The wooden bridge spanned a picturesque stream against a backdrop of a pine forest. He wished that he had a camera to take a picture of it.
Curious, he asked, "How many bridges have you built?"
"This was my first," Carl answered.
"Mine, too," Sam said.
"You're kidding," Pepper said incredulously.
It seemed to him that they had done this a thousand times before. They definitely knew what they were doing.
"No," Carl said.
Sam asked, "Who should have the honor of being the first to drive a truck over the bridge?"
"I think that honor should belong to Pepper," Carl said winking at Sam.
"Really?" Pepper asked pleased that they would let him do that.
"Sure. Someone has to see if the bridge will support a truck," Carl said.
"That someone might as well be you," Sam said with a laugh.
"Thanks," Pepper said with a lot less enthusiasm.