The phone rang a number of times before someone answered. Ben actually answered himself for a change. He apologized for being slow answering. They weren't expecting us to call so early, and had been busy while Carol changed his dressing. This was the first I'd heard of a dressing, and he said one of the old lesions had ulcerated and wouldn't heal. He sounded upbeat and lively, tonight, though, so we carried on the conversation. He knew Mom and Dad by now, and of course Diane and the kids. He'd been introduced to Paul a couple weeks earlier. He said Carol would be right with us; she had to put her 'doctor kit' away.
Soon Carol joined us, and everyone said hello again. Paul knew Carol was pregnant with twins, he just didn't know I was the father. Carol started the ball rolling as only she could. That's why she got the job. Ever since she jerked that blue haired lady's chain, I had a new respect for her ribald off-the-wall humour. "David, My Love?"
"Yes, Dear?"
"What did you pump into me besides His Precious Stuff? I look like you pumped a basket ball in there."
Everyone tried to keep a straight face, but Paul looked thunderstruck! His eyes were huge, and he looked to be gasping for breath. We couldn't let up just yet — HE had to ask the question.
"What are you talking about, Carol Anne?"
"You know damn well what I'm talking about you lecher! My belly looks like you pumped up a basket ball in there. You used to like it when I had a nice flat tummy you could lay your head on. If you tried that now, it'd slide right off and bounce on poor Mrs. Pussy!"
It was all the people at my end could do to keep from busting a gut. We all knew Carol could go on for hours if you kept feeding her enough lines to ricochet off. Paul was now looking from me to Diane and back, the question obvious on his face. I decided to work it by seeming to go to Ben for support.
"Ben, help me out here."
"No way, Sunshine, you put that thing inside her, you deal with her."
Paul had had enough. He somehow sensed his leg was being pulled, but he still had to ask. "David, it's not really my business, but am I to understand that you're the father of Carol Anne's twins?"
Paul had never heard us refer to Carol by anything but Carol Anne, so he called her that as a matter of course. Diane smiled sweetly at her father, and answered the question for me, all innocence. "Why, Daddy, what's wrong with that?"
"But... But..."
"That's what husbands and wives do, isn't it? Make babies?"
'H-husbands and w-wives?"
'Yes, Silly, Dave and Carol Anne have been married for twenty years. These are their first children together. Isn't it wonderful?"
"I-I guess so, Muffin, as long as you're OK with it."
"The only regret I have Daddy, is that I wasn't able to be with them when they made Our Children."
I thought Paul was going to faint. The rest of us had kept quiet, but now we all laughed. Paul kept on gamely, though. "You mean you're a multiple marriage? But why is Carol Anne in Calgary, and I thought Ben was her husband?"
I took pity on him. "Paul, we've wanted to tell you from the beginning, but we weren't sure how you'd take it. Carol Anne has a wicked nasty sense of humour, and we thought that might be the best way to break the ice with you. Carol Anne's gag is her way of letting us all know that she's started showing. Our babies were conceived on Sept. 22 and 23 after her mother's funeral. Carol Anne and I were forced to be separate for many years, and that was the first we were able to fulfill a lifelong dream. I'll tell you the whole story later. It takes too long for it to be told over the phone, and it's the third time in as many months it will be told."
Carol came back on. "I'm sticking my tongue out at you, David."
"Thought you might, Sweetheart. Do you want to tell part of it?"
"Thanks, Lecher! <raspberry> Paul, I'm sorry if we embarrassed you, but what David and Muffin — Oh Diane Marie, I LOVE that! — have told you is the truth. David and I were married twenty years ago, but only got to spend a year together before tragedy drove us and our other wife apart." Carol's voice was sad as she laid this latest explosive device at Paul's feet.
"Other wife? But Diane isn't old enough..." Paul was reeling.
"Not Diane Marie, Paul — my sister is our other wife. First there was me, then a few days later, Riekie. David married Diane Marie eight years ago, thinking he'd never see us again." Carol giggled as she added. "Now he's got me knocked up with twins, and Riekie is in a mad rush to get her affairs in order so she can get the same way."
Paul was still trying to get a grasp on the situation. "But what about Ben?"
Ben laughed as he came into the conversation. "What about me? I heartily approve of the whole situation, Paul. If you only knew the love these people share, you'd be moving Heaven and Earth to get them physically together again yourself. I married Carol Anne just a few years ago after I lost my first wife who I loved deeply. I've raised a family and I can't have any more. Carol Anne needed a friend and the best way to ensure I was there for her as a friend day or night, was to marry her."
Just as Paul got his head wrapped around one thing, he'd think of another. "Don and Lori, you knew about this?"
Dad explained his and Mom's role. "Yes, Paul, we knew. We knew twenty years ago. Lori even married them again with the Goddess' blessing twenty years ago this Christmas Eve when they formally exchanged rings. I think the kids still consider that to be their true anniversary, although they were actually married in August. David, show Paul your ring."
I took off my ring and showed him the inscription. Paul went white then smiled broadly. "Well, as long as my Muffin is happy, that's all that matters. And if the sounds I hear coming from your room at night are any indication, she's beyond happy, she's in love. But how do you girls feel about each other, sharing one man?"
"Carol and Diane both giggled, and Diane answered. "Well, Daddy, we're in love with each other, too. It's complicated, but it's true. I haven't physically met Carol Anne yet, but I'm as much in love with her as I am with David, and she loves me just as much. Isn't that right, Darling.?"
The love in her voice was very apparent, and when Carol answered, you could tell it was mutual. One was almost embarrassed to intrude on their intimacy. "You're so right, Muffin. Paul, sorry to steal your pet name, but it's so sweet, I just have to. May I?"
When Carol called Diane 'Muffin', you could just see her melt. I think she soaked the couch where she was sitting. She wasn't wearing panties, so it had to be the couch — our NEW couch.
Paul told Carol, "When you say it, Carol Anne, there's enough love in your voice to convince even the hardest of hearts, and I can assure you, I don't have a hard heart. We'll both use it, and I wouldn't be surprised to hear others use it too. Somehow it suits my little girl."
So Diane became 'Muffin' to all of us except the kids. Except now and then, one would refer to her in later years as 'Mommy Muffin'.
Ben started to cough, and I heard real concern in Carol's voice. "Oh dear! Ben, are you all right?"
Ben could hardly speak for coughing. "Yeah, I'm Ok for now, but I think I better lie down. You finish up with your family, and I'll see you later. Oh, Lori? I saw Beth again today. I told her I might be talking to you tonight. She sends her love and asked that I say 'may the Goddess be with you, Lori'. Did I say it right?"
Ben was weakening fast. Mom said. "Yes, Benjamin, you said it right. Now you get some rest. May the Goddess be with you, Benjamin, and with your spirit."
"Thanks, Lori <cough> Goodnight, all."
Mom told Carol. "Don't be long, Dear. He doesn't sound good. I know tonight was supposed to end happily, but poor Benjamin tried a little too hard to stay with us. Give him our love, and you better close off. We'll fill Paul in on the rest."
Carol was in tears. "Oh, Mom, I love you so much! I wish you were here to hold me! This is getting too hard for me. Ben keeps trying to go on, but he's slipping fast, and I'm scared."
"I can't come to you right now, but I'll call Beth and have her come over, OK?"
"Th-thanks, Mom! Sorry to be such a pain."
"You're no pain, you're My Daughter. Now say your good byes and look to your Friend. He needs you."
"OK, Mom. 'Bye everyone. I love you all. Nighty-night Rhiannon and Jenny! Sweet dreams, Muffin, my love. David, I need you... I love you... Come when I call, OK? I don't think it's going to be long. Byeee."
We all said goodbye at once. Diane and I said ours last, and told her we loved her. We told her we'd come on a minute's notice. Then she was gone to tend to Ben.
Diane took the kids to bed while the rest of us sat and talked. Seeing as Mom and Dad were already there, as soon as Diane came down from putting the little ones to bed, and I went up and kissed them good night, I started to tell Paul our story. I told him the whole thing. I gave him basically a synopsis without names except our own. It made the story more impersonal and it went a lot quicker. Still, Paul got the feel of how much My Girls and I loved each other through our whole ordeal, and had a tear in his eye when I finished. He thanked me for sharing it with him.
Diane cuddled up to her father and asked worriedly. "Are you mad at us, Daddy?"
Paul hugged her to him as he reassured her, "No. Muffin, I could never be angry with you for falling in love so completely. I once knew a love similar to yours and lost it. I'm happy for David and the other two that they're getting back together, and very happy for you that they found you. I'm grateful that all of you think enough of me to share this with me. Besides, I'm going to be a grampa again, if I understand the way you speak. Have you joined their knot, yet?"
We were all a little shaken that he referred to our knot, and Diane's joining it. She explained. "Not yet, the time isn't right yet. David's Power will tell us when the time is right."
Paul was intrigued. "David's 'Power'?"
I had to explain. "Since I first met Carol Anne, I have felt there was a Power guiding our lives. Then twenty years ago, it either turned away or was forced to turn away by an Evil. That Evil is still there, but is fading fast. The Power is gaining strength, and when it's ready, all four of us will be joined. It's going to be soon, too. I can feel it. How did you know to ask if Muffin was going to join our knot?" Muffin! I really liked the feel of that on the tongue!
Paul was deliberately vague. "I was raised in the Old Ways, David. I can tell you no more for now."
I thought I knew what he'd disclose someday — I could wait. "I understand. I see a familiar old pain in your eyes that was in mine until recently. But you've helped answer a lot of questions with that one admission. Did you know Rhiannon has an especially strong Sight? It was she who knew the twins were a boy and a girl." It was nice to be able to use familiar words in a way unfamiliar to most people and have him understand.
Paul said simply, "No, but it doesn't surprise me, either. Your whole family has it, don't they? You, with your Power. Lori, the High Priestess. Don the Wise and Learned One. I feel I've stumbled into a family coven."
Mom spoke up, then. "No one, except a few, knew of my rank, and certainly none of my family except for Don. How did you?"
Paul spoke with certainty. "Your bearing and strong presence. Your family wouldn't notice it because they're with you all the time. But why the secrecy? The Inquisition is long gone. Surely you don't still hide from that persecution?"
Mom was noncommittal "Old habits die hard, Paul, on both sides. It is wise to be cautious."
"I understand, Lori. I'll say no more."
With this enigmatic exchange between Paul and Mom, our evening came to a close. Mom and Dad blessed us, and left for their own home. Mom said she was going to call Beth and have her check on Carol. Paul visited with us for a while on small things then we all went to bed too. Diane and I made love, but it was a gentle, quiet, almost reflective lovemaking, and didn't disturb any one.
Sunday was a quiet day with everyone seeming very reflective. Even the kids seemed quiet. Paul stayed in his room until almost noon, and when he did come down, he was already packed for home. He left early, saying he had things to do at home, and he'd see us again Friday night.
The week went fairly quickly. Mom and Diane recovered their spirits and started decorating both houses for the Festive Season with real holly and mistletoe. Dad and I started looking for Christmas trees and selecting Yule logs for the big fire pit in our yard. Since that first Old Ways Christmas, Dad and I had kept a Yule log burning every year, almost as a beacon for My Girls to find their way home. Ben managed to call on Tuesday, but he sounded frail.
Thursday Dad loaned me his new car, and I drove to the aunts' to bring them home. I hoped they'd decide to stay on over Christmas. Our invitation was an open ended one. With Ben's condition apparently worsening rapidly, I thought having all Carol's family except for brothers and sister concentrated in one spot would be good for her. It would sure cut down on the number of phone calls she'd need to make.
I arrived at the aunts' in time for supper. They greeted me with warm hugs and warmer kisses (!) and fed me a wonderful meal. We spent the evening visiting, and I told them about Ben, and why I'd like them to be closer for Carol. They thought that was a good idea, and kept their return plans open as I suggested. They hadn't talked to Carol recently, and didn't know how poorly Ben actually was. It was extremely pleasant just to spend time with these marvelous ladies who had done so much for me, and I hoped they'd enjoy their stay with us. They did seem to be looking forward to it despite their original misgivings.
One thing I did notice about the girls, they were dressed less severe than was their wont, and their hair, while up, wasn't in its usual tight buns. They looked like the pull of a single pin would release it. We all turned in early; I automatically went to Carol's and my room. I could still smell her in it, and slept soundly. We'd left a lot of love in this room, and it wrapped around me like a warm blanket. We were up early the next day, Friday. The weather man was calling for a snow storm, and I wanted to be on the road in daylight if it struck before we got home. I didn't like traveling on Friday the thirteenth either. Hey! Allow me a little superstition!
After breakfast, I started loading their stuff in the car. The amount they had, it looked like they were moving in. When I kidded them about it, they said most of what they were bringing was Christmas presents and some baking they'd done. I thought I'd smelled olieballen.
I'd been really good about my diet and exercise routine, and no longer had a belly, such that I could almost fit into my old jeans from high school that is if I could get them over my thighs, which had muscled up from hard work and walking. I feared for my new youthful waistline from their baking. My shoulders had filled out from the time I was sixteen, and slinging a chain saw around for the last month had bulked them up even more. I thought Carol would like the package I presented now. It fit what she said I should look like, and I felt good, too, the best I'd felt in many years.
I got everything in the car, but they still had a lot of clothes; I guess they took me seriously about staying longer. The trunk held a lot more than the outward appearance of the car would suggest.
The aunts called their neighbour who was going to house sit for them, told her they were leaving, and didn't know when they'd return. They said they'd call from time to time and keep her up to date.
When we got in the car to leave, the ladies were as giddy as teenagers. They were off on a real adventure for them, and Jo made me feel really good by saying it didn't hurt to be off on that adventure 'in the company of a very handsome young man'. That woman actually made me blush!
We got away by nine thirty, and the drive home was relatively uneventful. We managed to stay ahead of the worst of the storm, and the afternoon traffic through the city, making good time. The aunts were excellent traveling companions, and the time seemed to fly by. We arrived at the farm by two o'clock, having driven straight through.
I introduced the aunts to Diane and Jenny. Rhiannon was still at school. Mom and Dad would be over later if the snow didn't get too deep to walk, and Paul would be here in time for supper if the storm didn't slow him down too much.
Pie and Jo were really taken with Jenny, and she seemed to be taken with them, too. Kids and pets are always your best line of defense when meeting strangers. If they don't like someone, then you should perhaps take a closer look yourself.
When the aunts met Diane, they did a double take and Pie commented how much Diane reminded her of Kit, especially her eyes. Jo poked me in the ribs and said I was a bad boy for taking three of the loveliest girls in the world out of circulation. Diane and the aunts hit it right off, and while they visited, getting to know each other, I brought all their stuff in from the car. The aunts rummaged around in their bags and brought out all the baked goods, presenting them to Diane. They took up positions at the kitchen table as if they'd been here all their lives. Diane put on a pot of tea and they had a grand time laughing and giggling. I hadn't seen the aunts this relaxed in a very long time.
I took their bags up to the spare room, and Diane asked where her dad was going to sleep. I told her he could sleep with the ladies, <Grin> or he could sleep on the couch-bed. He was only here for the weekend, whereas they were going to be here maybe right through Christmas, depending on Ben's health. I got a poke in the ribs for being a smart ass, and she went off to find the linens and blankets to make up her dad's bed in the living room later on.
Mom and Dad wandered over later in the afternoon, Rhiannon trailing along. They'd waited and met her coming up the hill from the bus. They all came in stomping and shaking the snow off them. It was really starting to storm. Diane started to get nervous for her dad driving in this weather. Rhiannon didn't wait on ceremony, and promptly introduced herself to Pie and Jo, saying, "You're Mommy Carol's aunts, Tante Pie and Tante Jo, aren't you?" She not only remembered their names, but knew who belonged to which name. The aunts loved her on first sight, and she loved them right back. Soon each aunt had a happy little girl sitting on their laps. When I brought Mom and Dad in to meet them, they both rose and curtsied to Mom, and spoke as one voice, sounding amazingly like Riekie's 'Little Girl'.
"How do you do, Priestess? We're very pleased to meet you."
Mom was flustered. Riekie had curtsied to her, but she was a seventeen year old meeting her husband's parents for the first time. These were grown, mature, professional women curtsying to her, and she wasn't sure how to respond. Finally, she just grinned, and said. "Thank you Ladies, but we don't wait on ceremony around here or you'll be the last one to eat. I'm Lori, nothing else. You must be Pie and Jo. I've heard so much about you over the last twenty years, I feel I almost know you. Now, let's sit down and have some of that tea, and what is that delicious smell?"
Mom successfully broke the ice, and after I introduced Dad, we all sat down at the kitchen table and sampled the wonderful baked goodies they had brought with them. My folks and the aunts were soon like old buddies, and the conversation became lively and familiar. I was very pleased with the way things were going. The kids had soon landed back in Pie and Jo's laps, making themselves right to home. Diane admonished everybody to go lightly on the goodies because supper wasn't that far off. She had a huge roast of venison in the oven, and some other delicious smelling concoctions going.
Just about dark, the phone rang, and I answered it. It was Paul. He'd made it to the turn up from the river, but didn't want to chance it any farther and stopped at a neighbour's to call for assistance. Dad and I jumped into our boots and threw on our winter coats. I fired up the truck and putting it in four wheel drive, we headed out to rescue Paul. I had thought we might be able to break a trail he could get his car through, but the snow was too deep and getting deeper quickly. The ploughs had been pulled off the roads once the school buses got through and wouldn't be out again until the storm passed. When we got to the neighbour's, he said Paul could leave his car there until the ploughs came out again. We loaded Paul and his gear in the truck and headed for home. Even in four wheel drive it was an interesting trip, but we made it.
When we came in the house, stomping and shaking, the women just glanced at us, and waited until we got our coats and boots off for us to make the introductions. Finally clear of our winter clothing, I took Paul into the kitchen to introduce him.
The aunts had their backs to him as we entered the room. I started to introduce him. "Pie, Jo, I'd like you to meet Diane's father..."
Pie and Jo rose from their chairs and turned to meet the stranger just as I started to introduce him. I never finished. The ladies turned, and instant recognition flowed among the three of them. The girls reacted first and literally squealed like teenagers as the flung themselves at him. "PAUL!"
As he opened his arms to them, he shouted in joy. "PIETE! JOANNA!"
Mom, Dad, Diane, and the kids were scraping their chins on the floor. Me? I wore the biggest shit-eating grin you ever saw! I had hoped for just this reaction. Purely by coincidence and good luck, that document I found in Diane's file had proven that Paul Curtis and Paul Koorstis were one and the same! The document? The court order changing Diane's name from Koorstis to Curtis. The other documents? Only one of real importance -- the same thing for Diane's sister Judy. Both should have been sealed away, but for some reason were left in their jackets.
Paul was aware I knew because I had him verify that the document was what I thought. I never told him why it was important, because I wanted them to have this moment of total surprise and sudden joy. Back to the reunion:
The three of them were a tangle of joyous arms and faces as all three tried to kiss at the same time. At long last, their initial emotion spent, I took the girls by the hand and led them into the living room, followed closely by Paul with Diane cuddling him. The girls cuddled me as if they were Carol and Riekie. I placed the girls on the couch and Diane, clueing in, steered her dad between them, As soon as he sat down, two very happy females cuddled right up close and hung off him like groupies off a rock star.
Mom and Dad and the kids followed us into the living room, Mom and Dad still trying to get their mouths working. They all were; the surprise was total! I was rather pleased with myself, and my silly grin testified to it.
Paul was the first to recover. He grinned and said. "Young man, you have a lot of explaining to do, and from the grin on your face, you planned this."
Pie and Jo still weren't able to speak. They just kept cuddling, cooing and kissing their husband-brother. I couldn't contain my own joy any longer and as a tear ran down my cheek, I just said. "Shut up for a minute, Dad, and give them a proper kiss or they won't leave you alone long enough to hear the tale."
Paul raised an eyebrow. "Dad is it, now? Hmmm."
But he took my advice and kissed first Pie and then Jo with what looked like a genuine-honest-to-God-Carol-patented tongue sucker. The ladies about fainted, and I heard two other females in the room groan.
Paul finally broke from his passionate kissing of the girls and turned to me. "Well, David, my son."
"Paul, these two damsels sent me on a Quest to find you for them. I've known them for over twenty years. They're the aunts in my own story. Carol and Riekie are your nieces." I turned to Diane. "Muffin, when you said you were writing to your cousin in Calgary, you had no idea you really were. She still doesn't know. You can call her tonight or you can wait for tomorrow's regular call.
"Now here's the story, and allow me my little embellishments. Paul, I learned of your significance to Pie and Jo just this September, and was so moved, I promised them I would try to find you for them. They didn't ask — I volunteered. They had heard you might be living in the general area when they first came to Canada after the War, but couldn't find you. As I was going to be looking for you and Diane Marie's father, I thought I might kill two birds with one stone, and do the two searches together.
"The likelihood that both people were the same was extremely remote, but after some strange things started happening, I started to formulate a theory, and worked from it. Dad, somewhere along the line I picked up your ability to connect the dots of seemingly unrelated information, and had already come to a conclusion before I even started looking. It shouldn't have been as easy as it was. The documents I found should have been sealed, but they were left in open files."
People were looking at me strangely, so I knew I was unintentionally riddling.
"Here it is in a nut shell. I was looking for Paul Koorstis and Paul Curtis. Does no one but Paul and me see the similarity in the names? I might have missed it, too, except for Diane Marie." she looked at me oddly. "The Friday before I went to the funeral, Diane Marie acted in a way that reminded me of Carol Anne. Since I've been home, her behavior is so much like Carol Anne and Riekie as to be spooky.
"Then I noticed some specific physical features that almost cried out that they were related, not the least of which is Diane Marie's striking resemblance to Carol Anne. Even other people have noticed they could pass for sisters. And, Diane Marie is from the city where Paul Koorstis was last rumoured to live. The coincidences were piling up. Then serendipity played its hand. Diane Marie needed a new birth certificate and I was able to examine her file. Lo and behold! There was the court order for a name change from Koorstis to Curtis. I photocopied it before the clerk realized it should be a sealed document. Then I pulled Judy's file, and there it was again, and I photocopied that one as well.
"I looked up the last known address for Paul Curtis from Diane Marie's birth registration on the tax rolls, and saw he was still the registered owner and it had a current phone number. I contacted Paul, liked what I saw, and had him verify that the information on the document was true. And Voila! I found Diane Marie's dad, and Pie and Jo's lost husband all in one fell swoop! It was almost too easy, but the whole time I was in the Registry, the Power felt incredibly strong. I have one question for you, Paul. From the candor with which you answered my query about the name change, I couldn't see any attempt to hide anything, especially your identity. You seemed totally unconcerned whether anyone found out. Why the name change, then?"
"I'll answer two questions together. First I didn't care whether anyone found out the name change. I had nothing to hide, so the documents didn't need to be sealed, and I thought someday, the girls would need to discover their heritage. Secondly it wasn't my idea. That stupid bitch Shirley insisted I anglicize my name because she couldn't pronounce Koorstis properly! I didn't want to do it, and dragged my feet until after the kids were born. She kept at me about it until I finally gave in. If you look at the date on the document you have, David, you'll see it's less than a year before we separated.
"I have no idea why my family couldn't find me, unless there was a spelling error on the documents searched or whatever. I settled in that town from the time I emigrated, and from the time of my first phone, the name was always spelled wrong in the phone book. They always dropped the middle 's' and it became Koortis. I tried many times to get it corrected, but it never was. That's what gave Shirley the idea, but she wanted an English spelling, hence 'Curtis'. At least changing our name to Curtis solved that small problem." He laughed at the phone company's seeming incompetence.
'OK, Paul, you've answered all my questions. I'm sure Your Girls have lots for you, as does Muffin. Hers can wait. Pie and Jo have a lot more catching up to do. Do you have any for me?"
"Yes. Whose funeral in September?"
"I'm sorry, Paul, you'll have to ask the girls. It's all part of the sad tale they have to tell you. Girls, if you need help with your story, call me, I'm just next door, OK? These rooms are your private rooms now, as long as the three of you are here. If you want or need total privacy, close the dining room door. If you want or will accept company, leave it open. We will still knock for admission. One caveat — I'm reserving the room now for eight tomorrow night so we can call Carol Anne and Ben on the speaker phone. We expect you to join us, OK? Now, there's a couple boxes of Kleenex handy if you need them. We'll leave you now to your privacy, and I'll move your bags to your room."
"I understand. I'm sure they have a lot to tell me, and I understand your reluctance to tell tales that should belong to them. I still have questions for you, though, My Son. Thank you for the privacy, that's very thoughtful. The rooms will be open tomorrow evening as you request, and now I do want to speak to my niece. Does she know of us? Where are the girls sleeping?"
"I'll answer as best I can. No problem on the privacy issue. When My Girls and I first started out, Mom and Dad let us have these rooms as sort of an 'apartment' so we could have privacy to explore our new family; I'm just passing that along to the next ones that need it. Yes, Carol Anne knows of your relationship, but doesn't know you are Paul Koorstis, just Muffin's daddy. We're short of beds, Paul. They'll just have to make do and bunk in with you. <Grin> Now if you'll excuse us, you have a lot of catching up to do, and we're intruding."
Dad choked, Mom stifled a laugh, and Diane started to say something until Mom steered her out of the room. Dad and I followed.
Dad's only comment was, "Stealing my gags, eh?" Before he laughed. Mom had to explain the joke to Diane.
We didn't hear anything from the living room for a very long time. You can't talk when you're kissing.