You Might be a Hypnofetishist

Note: This list existed since February 27, 2000, predating the list on RC's site by 6 months. I harbor no ill will toward him, but I also do not want to be considered a copycat. His list is much fuller than mine now and is interesting from a sub point of view.

I was going to do this as a top ten, but out of respect for Dave and the fact that the idea was going nowhere I went instead with the Jeff Foxworthy model. He, of course, is the self-described "redneck" who became famous for his "You might be a Redneck" signs. So here are signs you might be a hypnofetishist:
 

  • You own a shiny gold watch with a long chain and really enjoyed buying it.
  • Anytime you hear about repressed memories, psychological problems, bad habits or gum disease you say "Hypnosis can cure that!"
  • You haven't been to a concert in years but you go to every oily hypnotist's $20 show.
  • You offer to hypnotize your high school students (true story, a teacher did this in my class. We turned him down.)
  • Your favourite villain is The Master from Doctor Who, your favourite X-Men mutant is Sauron, your favourite paranormal programme is PSI Factor (first season), your favourite Fraggle is Convincing John.....
  • You've ever gone up to a member of the opposite sex and said "You look tired, very tired. You can barely keep your eyes open..." (extra points if it worked)
  • You know anything about the phrase NLP.
  • The second you get a new set of encyclopedias you open up the He-In volume.
  • You'd skip the season finale of ER for a new Marshall Sylver "Personal Power" infomercial.
  • You called you local cable company to get Univision...and you don't speak Spanish.