Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience.
 
 Author: Jack Spratt
Title: Jack Spratt's Regional Attitudes



   Regional Attitudes

   You may have heard on the news about a Southern California man who was
put under 72-hour psychiatric observation when it was found he owned 100
guns and allegedly had 100,000 rounds of ammunition stored in his home. 
The house also featured a secret escape tunnel.

   By Southern California standards, someone owning 100,000 rounds is
considered "mentally unstable."

   In Michigan, he'd be called "The last white guy still living in
Detroit." In Arizona, he'd be called "an avid gun collector."

   In Arkansas, he'd be called "a novice gun collector."

   In Utah and Florida he'd be called "moderately well prepared," but
they'd probably reserve judgment until they made sure that he had a
corresponding quantity of stored food."

   In Kansas, he'd be "A guy down the road you would want to have for a
friend."

   In Montana, he'd be called "The neighborhood 'Go-To' guy."

   In Idaho, he'd be called "a likely gubernatorial candidate."

   In Georgia, he'd be called "an eligible bachelor."

   In North Carolina, Virginia, W.Va., Mississippi, Tennessee, Kentucky and
South Carolina he would be called "a deer hunting buddy."

   And in Texas he'd just be "Bob, who's a little short on ammo."





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