Subject: My Thoughts About Submission
Story Codes: nosex
Updated: August 3, 2016
Author: Kelly <pghp_girl@yahoo.com>
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
!!!WARNING!!!!
This file contains sexually explicit material which may include graphic
depictions of underage, nonconsensual and unprotected sex as well as
incest, adultery, sodomy and bestiality. It is distributed on a website
clearly identified as "For Adults Only". Possession by a minor is
strictly forbidden. If you are not legally empowered to be in possession
of such material, do not read it and delete it immediately.
This work is copyrighted 2016 to the author. It may be posted to non-
commercial "free" sites, or in the "free" area of commercial sites so
long as no changes are made to the content and the Author information is
retained. Any other use of this work is by written permission of the
Author only.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Summary
=======
If there's one concept that is the most misinterpreted and misunderstood
by people I talk to, it's submission. The mere mention of the word seems
to bring up images of handcuffs, dom/sub relationships, whips. leather,
slavery, and all sorts of debauchery. This may be true for the kinky
folks out there, but that's NOT at all the sort of submission I'm
referring to when I use the word.
When I speak of submitting myself to someone else, be it my husband,
father, or even God, it means something entirely different from that
portrayed on porn sites. It's nothing kinky or perverted but rather an
outward and visible testament to my relationship with that person. It's
nothing forced but rather the natural outcome resulting from having
complete trust in someone else. Instead of being humiliated or degraded,
I am fulfilled by my role in a loving and respectful relationship.
So let's talk about submission from THAT angle and leave the creepy stuff
to the porn folks. Let's talk reality, not fantasy.
Table of Contents
=================
Chapter 1 - Taking Things Out of Context
Chapter 2 - Submission During Casual Sex
Chapter 3 - Biblical-Based Sexual Submission
Chapter 4 - Conclusion
Chapter 1 - Taking Things Out of Context
========================================
Perhaps one of the most oft misquoted passages in the Bible comes from
Ephesians 5 which speaks to the submission of wives to their husbands.
So often people only quote the first five words in verse 22: "Wives,
submit to your husbands..." and forget all the rest. Men (and even some
women) use these words to rationalize their stance that women should
remain barefoot and pregnant, never leaving the kitchen except to make
babies for their husbands. Even if not taken to that extreme, it's
still used today to justify the mistreatment of women by putting a man's
needs first without concern for the woman's. In case you haven't read
it, here's the what that passage actually says:
Ephesians 5 (NIV) 22: Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.
23: For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of
the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24: Now as the church
submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in
everything. 25: Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the
church and gave himself up for her.
Maybe it's just me but that's a far cry from calling for a
domination/submissive relationship. Yes, it DOES establish the husband
as the "head" of the house, and yes it DOES call for the wife to "submit"
to him BUT it also says to do so "as Christ loved the church and gave
himself up for her" - hardly a BSDM role.
Just as important, and what is usually conveniently "forgotten" when
people quote this passage, is that these verses also command the husband
to love his wife as much as Christ loved the church AND to give himself
up for her - again, not exactly a whips and chains domination scenario.
Without getting into a deeper religious debate, my point is there is
another way to look at the idea of submission which has nothing to do
with domination. Whether it's between a husband and wife, father and
daughter, mother and son, or whatever the relationship may be, these
passages provide guidance for how that relationship should be treated
rather than who dominates who.
Chapter 2 - Submission During Casual Sex
========================================
To most people, when they hear the word "submit" they immediately think
of someone giving themselves up due to the overpowering forces of another
entity. They see it as losing their independence while being forced to
do things they may not desire or even believe in.
When applied to casual sex, this view of submission typically becomes
part of a domination scenario where one person is basically degrading the
other. Submittal becomes a humiliating condition where one person is
subjugated by another who seeks to gain sexual pleasure from their
ability to impose their desires on the other. At the same time, the
person in the submissive role also gets some form of sexual pleasure.
Hey, it's definitely not my scene but if you get off from it, go for it!
Just to be clear, I'm NOT against BSDM per se - it's just not for me.
It's not that much different than anal sex from my perspective. If
someone wants a dick (or whatever) pushed up their asshole, more power to
them but it doesn't do anything for me. Assuming both parties consent,
neither BSDM or anal sex cause any harm (other than a sore butt) and if
it makes them happy, what's the big deal? All this goes back to the
domination themes and has nothing to do with "submission" as I'm trying
to address it.
Actually, in the interest of full disclosure, I do enjoy role-playing as
a mild submissive at times when I'm with a guy. The key is the word
"role-playing". It's sometimes fun to let him call the shots as I try
to anticipate what he'll demand that I do next - and then do it for him.
It's more a game for me than anything else. There's a game I like to
play where we agree to go out and I have to do anything the guy tells me
(yes, we DO set some boundaries at this start). Of course in the back of
my mind I know I can always say no and thus I feel I'm actually the one
who's in control.
Along those lines I think it's rather amusing that so many guys seem to
think women are "submitting" to them when they suck their dick. Maybe in
some cases this is true as I know a lot of girls don't enjoy oral sex as
much as I do and as such they only do it to please their guy. As for me,
how can sucking cock be an act of submission when it's something I love
to do? Besides, any guy who thinks I'm submitting to him when I take his
sensitive dick in my mouth needs to stop and think about it for a moment.
Whose most tender body part is between whose teeth?
In summary, so-called "submission" as part of a healthy casual sex
relationship is really more about having fun than true "submission" from
a biblical perspective. Thus none of this has anything to do with the
form of submission I'm referring to when I tell people that I "submit" to
my father or husband.
Chapter 3 - Biblical-Based Sexual Submission
============================================
When a person truly submits themselves in a sexual way to another person,
not as part of a game to do just for fun, but as a true form of
submission in line with what the Bible describes, it's truly the basis
for a special relationship. When a person gives themselves totally and
completely to the other person, without hesitation or second thoughts, it
can be almost magical.
The key is you can't go half-way. It's "all in" or nothing. No matter
what the other person desires or needs me to do, I have to be willing do
it, period. As I said, submission requires a truly special relationship
and is NOT some sort of perverted game or slavery scene.
The most important thing that I cannot over-emphasize enough is that for
this form of submission to work, each person has to trust the other
totally and completely. It is really the TRUST that leads to real
submission, not FEAR. The person submitting has to believe in their
heart that the other person loves them and respects them so much that
they would never be asked to do anything that would hurt them or in any
way harm or humiliate them. Likewise, the other person has to feel
confident that they can express their needs and wants without the fear of
being judged or turned away. You might say that submission is more of an
indicator of the state of your relationship, not the foundation.
Just remember what Ephesians tells us... "...as to the Lord."
It's certainly not easy for such a relationship to develop. In fact,
there's only two people whom I can truly say that I've submitted myself
wholly during sex and that would be my father and husband. With my
father, I know how precious our incestual relationship is to him and that
he would never do anything to jeopardize it. With my husband I believe
with all my heart that he loves and treasures me and would also never do
anything to harm me or our marriage.
As my father's daughter or my husband's wife, I know that neither of them
would ever do anything to me sexually that was not in my best interest,
even if sometimes I don't fully understand it at the time. If there was
ever a time when one of them DID ask for something I was uncomfortable
with, I know it would have to be due to something either extremely
special or due to something out of their control. For instance, I know
that both of these men are pedophiles and as such they have needs and
addictions they cannot always control. As such there are things I will
do for them that I am not always comfortable doing but I do it out of
love for them.
Of course, submitting yourself to someone is also about doing things for
the other person that may not be convenient or even welcome at the time.
For instance, there have been times when my father has come to me when I
just wasn't in the mood for sex at that particular moment. However, if
you've decided to truly submit yourself to someone then you can't do it
only when it's convenient for you
One thing I'm truly proud of is that I've never said "no" to my father -
at least when it comes to having sex. Like c'mon, I wasn't a perfect
child by any means! It hasn't mattered when or where, I've always done
whatever is necessary to meet his needs no matter what they were or where
we were at the time. Anyone can submit when it's convenient. It's what
you do when you have to sacrifice that makes the difference.
Some people have asked me if because I submit to my dad if I would do
anal sex if he asked me. That's sort of like the "Can God make a rock so
heavy he can't lift it?" type of question. I can't answer it because the
question itself is based on the false premise that my dad would even ask
me such a question in the first place - which he never would.
This is what I mean by trust - I trust my father enough to KNOW that he
would never disrespect my beliefs in such a way. Still, as I mentioned
before there could possibly be a time when some overpowering need arose
where he couldn't help himself. In such a case I would just have to try
and understand the situation and forgive him as he is no more perfect
than anyone else. And yes, I would do it, no matter what.
Until I got married my father was the only man to whom I truly submitted.
Once I said my vows that meant I was then obligated to submit to my
husband as well. Of course I didn't hesitate one second in doing so. If
I couldn't trust Steve enough to submit myself to him as his wife as my
beliefs require, then I wouldn't have married him, nor should I have.
Personally, I despise women who suck their husband's cock and do other
things he asks while they are dating but once they get the ring then they
quit rather than submit to their husband's needs. As much as I oppose
adultery, women who do such disgraceful things deserve to be cheated on!
Note that in addition to the oft-quoted Ephesians passage, there is still
the matter of the Ten Commandments where we are told to "Honor you father
and mother." Well, so far as I'm concerned there's no greater way to
honor my father than to give my body to him freely and unconditionally.
To demonstrate such faith and trust in him actually empowers me rather
than making me subservient. When my dad comes to me and takes me, as is
his right to do as my father at any time, and joins with me as I yield my
body completely to him, it becomes one of the most incredible feelings I
can experience not only as his daughter but as a woman as well.
Chapter 4 - Conclusion
======================
Like most articles I write this one arose from being asked the same line
of question many times. Trying to write it out in e-mails or chats meant
having to repeat myself constantly which became a pain in the butt. Even
when I did I wasn't doing justice to what I was trying as compared to
sitting down and writing it out in a more detailed and hopefully coherent
format.
At risk of repeating myself, I just to make it clear that when I submit
to my father, it is only as any daughter SHOULD submit herself to her
father. Of course that assumes the father is aware of his
responsibilities as well AND lives by them. It has nothing to with
domination in a BSDM context. It's based solely on my personal beliefs
and the words of the Bible.
Hopefully this clears up the confusion and misunderstandings about what I
mean when I say that I "submit" to someone!
THE END