Subject: Kelly's Diary - Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
Story Codes: MF Mf FF Ff F-solo incest father mother daughter
Updated: August 1, 2016
Author: Kelly <pghpa_girl@yahoo.com>
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!!!WARNING!!!!
This file contains sexually explicit material which may include graphic
depictions of underage, nonconsensual and unprotected sex as well as
incest, adultery, sodomy and bestiality. It is distributed on a website
clearly identified as "For Adults Only". Possession by a minor is
strictly forbidden. If you are not legally empowered to be in possession
of such material, do not read it and delete it immediately.
This work is copyrighted 2016 to the author. It may be posted to non-
commercial "free" sites, or in the "free" area of commercial sites so
long as no changes are made to the content and the Author information is
retained. Any other use of this work is by written permission of the
Author only.
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Summary
=======
For more than a dozen years now I've chatted and exchanged e-mails with
literally thousands of people. As you might imagine I get asked many of
the same questions over and over again. Not only did this quickly
become tedious, some of my answers are hard to properly express in quick
Instant Message format. While e-mail allows for more expansive
responses, who wants to type the same thing repeatedly? That's why I
decided to write up more complete answers to my most frequently asked
questions (FAQ) and post them here. While I'm happy to answer most
questions, please don?t be offended if my response is to ask you to look
at this file first.
This document is updated periodically as patterns emerge or I find that
I've inadequately explained something. If you have any suggested
questions for me to add, please send them in an e-mail to me at
pghpa_girl@yahoo.com.
Table of Contents
=================
Chapter 1 - About My Diary and Being On-Line
Chapter 2 - Sex in General
Chapter 3 - Incest
Chapter 4 - Underage Sex
Chapter 5 - Home, School and Church
Chapter 1 - About My Diary and Being On-Line
=============================================
Q: Are your stories true?
A: Figured I'd start with this one and get it over with as it's by far
the number one question people ask me...
In the words of Hollywood, "Based on a true story...."
In general the stories in my "Diary" and "About Me" categories reflect
actual events that have occurred in my life. Needless to say I don't
have recordings of every moment so the events and dialog are based
entirely on my own memories and to a limited extent those of my friends
and family - none which are even close to being 100% perfect. I have
personally written every word of these stories. Nobody edits them
although unfortunately THAT is painfully evident at times. Also, while I
refer to my diary entries as "stories" that's not intended to imply they
are fabrications, it's just the way I refer to them.
I've always been open about the fact that I use artistic license although
that's more for editing and personal security purposes than to "enhance"
a story. By artistic license I mean that I don't have the time or
ambition to write full length novels so I typically condense events to
keep the story to a reasonable length. By personal security I mean I
make a concerted effort to protect the identity of me and the people in
my stories. For example, the names I use are never the actual names of
the people involved. This complicates things as sometimes when people
ask me questions based on an older entry I have to go back and look to
remember what name I used!
Unless necessary to the plot of the story I change the locations and in
many cases the dates of the events, sometimes by years. Personal
descriptions and family makeup are also heavily disguised. For example
the family tree I've posted is not 100% accurate but it's adequate for
the purpose of helping people understand the relationships I'm writing
about. None of this is intended to be deceptive but rather to protect me
and my family's personal privacy. In the end I'd summarize by saying
that my stories are reasonably accurate portrayals of the substance of
each event. After all, it's not like I'm publishing an autobiography!
What I find ironic is that if anything I get more criticism for NOT
enhancing a story when it fails to meet people's expectations based on
the fictional stories written by other authors. I can't even count the
number of times people have complained that I didn't do this or that. My
response is simple - hey, it didn't happen! If I were to start down the
slippery slope of embellishing my diary stories then I may as well
publish them all as fantasies.
Some people have asked why I don't write about the so-called "normal"
events of my life. Well, the reason my diary focuses on the sexual
aspects of my life is that's what people who come to this site expect so
why waste my time writing up stuff that nobody cares about? The result
is a pretty lopsided perspective of my life and so my diary should NOT be
taken as a complete picture of who I am or what I do. My biggest problem
is that people take this very one-sided view of me and assume it reflects
my everyday life. Actually I'd bet that most people reading this
wouldn't recognize me even if they lived next door to me and that's
exactly my goal.
Even when it comes to my sexual life not everything gets written down,
not even a sizable percentage. I choose specific events to write about
not because they're necessarily the most enjoyable or wildest but rather
based on the impact they had on my life and personal development.
Sometimes that means telling about something that was NOT particularly
enjoyable but I felt people should know about it to get a better
understanding of why I am who I am.
People who have read my diary and then see photos of me often comment I
don't look like what they expected. It's almost as if I should have the
word "slut" tattooed across my forehead. It's almost laughable when
people say I look "normal" as if they're disappointed. Well I'm not a
porn star and while you may get the impression from my diary that my life
revolves around sex it's simply not true. Yes, for me sex IS important
but God and my family come first. Look at the gaps in time between the
entries and it should be enough to make you realize how much of my life
is NOT in my diary.
********
Q: What about the other stories?
A: The "About Me" section contains entries that are just that - about me,
such as this one. Many of these are my personal opinions and I ask that
they be respected, even if you don't agree with them.
Everything in my "Fantasies" section is just that - my fantasies. All of
these are 100% fiction and are not intended to be related to any person
or place. Note that these are MY fantasies and were written entirely by
me.
In contrast, none of the stories in the "Friends" folder were written by
me but rather by people who claim these events actually happened to them.
These have been submitted to me either through chats or e-mails. All of
them were supposedly written only to me and none were "borrowed" by me
from other web sites although there are a few I've seen later on other
web sites which apparently stole them. While I may collate and edit the
stories people send me for better readability, I don't claim any
ownership and cannot vouch for their authenticity. My personal opinion
is that the vast majority of stories sent to me are total fabrications
and even if there is an element of truth, it's likely greatly
exaggerated. Through various means I've managed to confirm that a very
small number are definitely true. In most cases they had no intention of
me finding this out so I won't say which ones or why I believe so for
their privacy and my protection.
Likewise, none of the stories in the "Stories by Others" folder were
written by me. Just like those in the Friends section, these were
submitted to me either through chats or e-mails. The difference is the
authors don't even attempt to claim realism, they are total fabrications
and fantasies.
********
Q: Your diary suddenly disappears at times and then returns. Why?
A: Usually it's something to do with being frustrated or upset with how
people are responding to me or not. At times it seems nobody give a
damn. Remember that I don't get a dime from doing this so reader
feedback is my only "reward". According to the reports I get from ASSTR,
I get lots of hits but virtually none of them respond. I call these
people "lurkers". When things build to the breaking point I delete
everything. It's pretty easy in that I just select "all" and hit the
delete key. It usually makes me feel better at first but then people
contact me and ask for it to be restored so I end up reposting it again.
If this makes me sound needy or egotistical, oh well. I'm human too!
********
Q: Why do you write and publish your diary?
A: Most people, even many of my friends, have no idea the self-image
issues I struggled with growing up and continue to have even today
although to a lesser degree. I was painfully aware that I was the only
one in my middle school circle of friends who had not graduated from her
training bra although that's a somewhat theoretical concept as I never
actually wore one. My figure more resembled those of the boys in class
rather than the girls and I never got the leering looks from the hot guys
that they gave girls like my BFF Beth. Granted, she was already in a B
cup at the start of 6th grade! It got to the point where my parents felt
compelled to take me to a counselor who helped me learn several methods
to better accept who I was. One of the most helpful techniques she
taught me was how to flirt with men and use their response to recognize
that I was much sexier than I gave myself credit for being. Of course
now I realize it had nothing to do with how sexy I was as men will get
horny over any girl that pays attention to them. Still I was naive and
it was so easy to do that I became a total slut before I exited 8th
grade. Throughout high school I sought the attention of the boys as well
as older men and I have to say those were some of the best years of my
life even though I was just an A-cup for most of them.
This worked for me so long as I was around men that I could have sex
with. As I got older I learned that their looks don't really mean all
much but rather it's whether they want sex with me that counts. This
strategy worked fine while I was in high school but about half-way
through my freshman year of college at a VERY strict Christian university
I found myself feeling especially horny and depressed about myself.
That's when I started chatting on-line with strangers about sex even
though it was quite against all the rules. Of course it wasn't the same
as having sex for real but it was better than nothing on those days when
my ego was deflated.
I quickly found when chatting that people asked me the same questions
over and over about my sexual experiences and views. While it was
exciting at first it soon became a pain having to type the same responses
over and over. Not only that, I always felt like I was leaving out too
many details and was worried that people were getting wrong ideas about
me. Thus I started writing out short blurbs I kept in simple text files
about some of my experiences which I copied and pasted when chatting with
people instead of writing them out each time. Over time as I fleshed
them out and included more details until they became too big to include
in chats. So that's when I started posted them in on-line forums.
About the same time I started chatting with a couple of men who wanted me
to do things with them I'd never done before such as help them to cheat
on their wives, have sex with their teenage kids, and so forth. Although
I couldn't even imagine myself actually ever doing such things for real,
we had some erotic chats about it and before I realized it I found myself
fantasizing about them as well. I wrote out several of those fantasies
for them to read. I'd never written any adult fantasy stories before and
I found myself getting horny when I wrote them! Sometimes I even had to
take a break and masturbate about the fantasy I was describing. If
nothing else I found that masturbation was a sure-fire way to beat
writer's block.
One thing led to another and over the course of the last thirteen years
my diary has grown and shrunk until it's what it is today. Sometimes I
look it over and am amazed at how many things I've written over time!
All my stories, both real and fantasy, take me a long time to write so I
try to limit them to events that have some significance to me such as a
"first time", something that affected me deeply emotionally, or to be
honest just something I want to brag about. Frankly I enjoy the feedback
I get when I publish them and it makes me feel a bit turned on knowing
People are out there masturbate as they read about the things I've done.
********
Q: Your early entries sound so mature and graphic and they flow too well
to have been written by a young teenager. Did you really write them"
A: Keep in mind that I didn't even START writing these until I was a
freshman in college. Frankly, I wouldn't even know HOW to write like a
young girl again. Even if I tried I'm sure that it would sound horribly
fake just as so many of those ridiculous stories you find on-line. Even
so I grimace sometimes when I read the ones I wrote years ago. That's
why some of the older ones have been edited over the years so I can fix
spelling and grammar errors as well as to add missing details that I
realize should've been included. As I edit them I suppose they become
even more "mature" so I make no attempt to pretend they were written by
me at that age.
********
Q: What is the meaning of the numbers you use in your file names?
A: These allow the ASSTR.org filing system to list them by date. A
computer nerd I chatted with a long time ago suggested I use a naming
system where 20060705 is July 5, 2006. This allows them to be easily
sorted in chronological order.
********
Q: Is there a sequence to your stories that they should be read in?
A: I recommend starting with the ABOUT ME section as those should help
you to understand me better. Then I recommend reading my diary in
chronological order starting from the beginning. The earlier stories
were written to stand alone as I was submitting them randomly to various
story sites where there was no linkage between them. After I started
posted them on my own web site I got complaints that the introductions
were redundant so now I when I periodically edit them to fix typos and
such I also try to shorten the introductions. The down side is this
assumes people have already read the earlier ones.
********
Q: Why won't you meet people from on-line or even cam or talk to them on
the phone?
A: It's really pretty simple... I have no compelling reason to do so and
plenty of reasons NOT. I have ample opportunities for sex so there's no
need to seek out people on-line. Two factors come into play:
1. I protect my privacy fervently. Would you believe I've seen entire
blogs dedicated to people trying to figure out who I am and where I
live? Trust me, they weren't looking to have a three-some! For every
person I wouldn't mind knowing more about me there are many more whom
I would never want to have anything to do with. If I was doing
anything illegal then the authorities could track me easily so I'm
concerned about the folks who just don't like me and want to hurt me.
2. I don't trust strangers with my privacy. Even if I shared my details
privately with someone or cammed just with someone I thought that I
could trusted, who's to say it would stay with them? It's not so much
I'm worried about them posting anything although that IS a concern,
I'm more worried that they will screw up and someone else will find it
like an angry wife. A few of the men who chat with me were caught by
their wife because they forgot to close their e-mail, left a file
open, didn't erase their history, etc. when their thoughts were
dominated by their little head.
********
Q: You don't share much personal information yet you seem to expect
people who chat with you to share theirs in great detail. Isn't this
more than a little hypocritical?
A: Yes it is and I freely admit it. Then again keep in mind that in 100%
of the cases THEY are the ones who contacted me. I have NEVER initiated
contact with a stranger on the Internet so if they want to talk to me
then it's going to be on MY terms. If someone don't like it then they
simply don't have to contact me. It's not like I don't make it clear
ahead of time.
Chapter 2 - Sex in General
==========================
Q: When did you first have sex?
A: Compared to most of my friends I got a late start as I was fourteen my
first time. It was during the summer before my freshman year of high
school with Steve, the sixteen year-old brother of one of my girlfriends
and my husband today. It helped that it wasn't even close to being his
first time not to mention that my mom had me well-prepared. All in all
it was a wonderful experience for me, at least a LOT better than most
girls have told me about their first time. If you want all the details
then read the entry in my diary for August 2, 1999.
That was when I first had SEX which is defined more precisely as the
first time a male penis penetrated my vagina. I'd given Steve a blowjob
weeks earlier than that but in my dictionary that doesn't count as "sex".
Prior to that I'd been masturbating regularly since I was eleven
including the occasional use of my mother's dildos and vibrators although
I've always been more comfortable with my own fingers. Before that age I
was no different than most kids in that I was a little curious about
things but nothing that would qualify as sexual.
********
Q: How many men have you had sex with?
A: Over the years I've had one-to-one sex with well over a hundred
different men. If you want to be really anal about it (no pun intended),
then a LOT more cocks than that have actually penetrated my pussy at one
time or another - well over 200, probably more than 300 by now. Why
the difference in numbers? Well, I've been to a number of parties where
multiple guys fucked me, bachelor parties where I was the featured
"entertainment", and other situations where I had multiple partners in
totally impersonal circumstances. OK, so maybe it sounds lame but I find
it hard to say I've had sex with a guy I'd never seen before and didn't
even know his name. Those who have read about me in the past know that I
use to keep a listing of every man I had sex with but that got to be too
much of a chore so I stopped doing that a long time ago.
As for oral sex, I've never even tried to keep track of the number of
cocks I've sucked! OMG, I can only imagine how many of them there have
been. All I can say for sure is that it's been a LOT!!! Then again a
blowjob isn't technically sex.
********
Q: Are you bisexual?
A: Technically I am in that I enjoy sex with both men AND women. However
when it comes to pure physical enjoyment I MUCH prefer sex with men as I
love penetration and a finger or dildo can never take the place of a real
cock. This factor alone gives the boys a distinct advantage over the
girls. On the other hand while men are the best when it comes to meeting
my most basic physical needs, women can be far more satisfying
emotionally. What I guess I'm trying to say is that as a general rule
with guys it's all about satisfying my PHYSICAL needs whereas with girls
it's more about dealing with my EMOTIONAL needs. In other words when I'm
feeling horny I tend to seek out a guy for sexual release but when I'm
feeling down then I look to a girlfriend for comfort. Of course as with
all rules there are exceptions but for the most part it holds pretty
true.
********
Q: Are you a slut?
A: OK, so if the shoe fits... I'd say by using most people's definition
then yes, I'm a slut. While for some people that's a slur so long as you
use MY definition it's a moniker that I'm proud to bear. According to my
personal dictionary being a slut means that people find me sexually
attractive and that I'm willing to take full advantage of the physical
blessings that God has given me.
********
Q: You say you're a slut but not a whore. What's the difference?
A: When a guy "dates" a whore he knows what he's going to get and he
expects to get it with no questions asked if for no other reason than he
paid for it. In sharp contrast when he's out with a slut he may
entertain hopes but he can't be 100% sure just how far she'll go. For
that reason a whore can never tease as effectively as a slut. A guy
KNOWS when he's with a whore that he's getting it sooner or later whereas
with a slut there's always that question... will she or won't she?
To put it more simply... whores SELL their bodies to please a man while
sluts USE their bodies to please themselves.
********
Q: Do you like men to shave their crotch?
A: Before I answer that let me say I love almost ALL men's crotches so
it's really just a matter of preferences. That said, I definitely like
bushy crotches the best and the more and thicker the pubic hair the
better. For me it feels good to reach down inside of a guy's pants and
run my fingers through his coarse pubic hair; then smell my fingers later
to enjoy his musky scent. When I suck a man's cock I take pleasure in
feeling his crotch hair against my face, especially when I take him all
the way in my mouth and my nose is buried deep in his crotch.
Now as for the rest of him - shave it off guys! I don't like being seen
at the beach with a gorilla. As for beards and mustaches - UGH! And
what's with this two-day growth crap anyway? I mean, who decided THAT
was sexy? Just scratches my face and thighs so far as I'm concerned.
********
Q: What are you wearing?
A: It's amazing how many times I've been asked this when I chat!
Mornings are easy as usually I shower, wrap a towel around me and sit
down for a few minutes to catch up on e-mail. Otherwise at home I prefer
wearing something loose on top and nothing on the bottom. It doesn't
really matter what I wear on top so long as it's something. It can be a
T-shirt, a blouse, a man's shirt, or even just a bikini top or bra.
Anything works so long as my boobs aren't just hanging out there.
Unlike my mother and aunt, I've always loved being bottomless. If you
ask me nothing compares to feeling the cool air against your bare ass.
Because I hate feeling restricted down there I rarely wear panties under
a dress, even to church or should I say, especially to church! Of
course I always wear panties when I teach. Besides the fact I could be
fired in violation of the dress code by not wearing them, there's no
excuse for an adult woman to flash twelve year-old boys in a classroom.
Sorry but despite all the fantasies men may have of me I almost NEVER run
around nude for no reason at all. The only times I'm typically totally
naked for any extended period are when I'm in bed, taking a shower, or
having sex. While in bed if I need a drink I may run from my bed to the
kitchen without bothering to put anything on, but if I'm going to stay up
for a snack then I'll throw something on.
********
Q: Do you wear a bra and panties?
A: Actually most people just ask if I wear panties but I'll answer for
both anyway. Until my latter teen years my bust wasn't much to brag
about and that's being kind. In fact it was quite embarrassing which
my therapist claims explains my fetish for keeping something over them.
In any case bras are uncomfortable and if you don't need the support then
why torture yourself? Since I was under no pressure to wear one from my
mother and my dad certainly never liked me in one, I just never really
got started with the habit. Believe it or not usually the only time I
wore one as a teenager was when I went out on dates. Like most girls, I
learned early that guys really get off undoing your bra!
These days I keep a couple of flirty ones around for those occasions that
warrant one like when I want to tease or flirt with men, especially my
husband. A couple of more modest ones are for more formal events such as
church where I still want to wear something sheer or especially tight.
At school as a teacher I'm required to wear one and there it's more about
comfort as I don't show off my bra to my students. Thus my underwear
drawer has a lot of "practical" bras. If I have to wear one all day then
I may as well be comfortable. Keep in mind as a general rule the sexier
the lingerie the less comfortable it is to wear.
Even though my boobs eventually grew to be something I'm more or less
happy with these days, I'm fortunate that they remain firm enough that as
a rule I still rarely wear a bra except to work. There IS one other time
I usually wear one and that's on special dates just like I did back in my
high school days. It's still amazes me how guys get so turned taking off
a girl's bra, even when she's his wife!
Panties are a similar case. I wear them with extra short skirts so I
don't get arrested for indecent exposure except on special occasions
when I want to tease. I've also found that guys seem to like a
little mystery more than blatant exposure. For whatever reason getting a
peek at my panties up my skirt seems to be more erotic than a glimpse of
my bare pussy unless you're a Hollywood actress trying to draw attention
to yourself as you get out of your limo. Like bras, guys especially seem
to love it then when they get to remove your panties.
There are a few times when I definitely wear panties, one being during my
period, especially if I'm having a heavy flow. That's just a matter of
basic hygiene and cleanliness. I also wear panties to work with my bra.
The school administrators would not be amused if I showed up looking
slutty - at least not officially. Finally there are just some clothes
where panties are more comfortable like tight jeans which can rub your
crotch raw if you go commando all day.
What I wear for panties depends on why I am wearing them. At school it's
the same as it was for bras so it's all about comfort. Thus full cut
boring cotton panties work best unless I'm wearing a tight skirt or
pants where something more discreet is warranted as I HATE panty lines.
If I'm with friends for a sleepover or just a girls night out then loose
boy shorts are my preference. In church it's something more formal, a
high cut thong with a more full back and front seems more appropriate. A
skimpy thong or G-string works when the whole point is to flirt and let a
guy THINK you're not wearing panties until he finally gets a close enough
view to find out that yes, you are. I wonder how many guys realize just
how complicated it can be for a girl to choose the right panties? LOL
********
Q: Do you like pantyhose?
A: Really, find me one girl who honestly says she ENJOYS wearing them
versus resigned to it. As a general rule women wear pantyhose for only
ONE reason - they make your legs look better. OK, sometimes they help
keep you a little warmer in winter as well but that's not the primary
reason. As a matter of etiquette I typically wear pantyhose for formal
events, especially when wearing a particularly short skirt or dress.
That's especially true in winter when I don't have a tan and my legs look
pale.
********
Q: Do you consider a blowjob to be "sex"?
A: By definition "sex" is the penetration of a female vagina by a male
penis regardless of the depth of penetration. Yes, tips count for you
guys eying young girls! Since that doesn't happen during a blowjob then
it goes without saying that blowjobs are NOT sex. William Jefferson
Clinton is famous for saying, "I did not have sex with that woman." While
technically he was telling the truth I think most people were more
worried about his intent which is a totally different issue.
When I'm sucking a cock I certainly enjoy doing it but when I compare it
to being fucked it's an entirely different experience both emotionally
and physically. Unlike when I feel a man inside of me where I am getting
just as much pleasure as he is, sucking a guy's cock is more me giving
HIM pleasure. It's really no different than giving him a massage except
that I'm using my mouth instead of my hand. As for me, I get the
satisfaction of seeing the pleasure I'm able to give to him, not to
mention the side benefits as most men will do most anything for a BJ!
I also enjoy the power a blowjob gives me over a man. Face it guys, when
a girl has your sensitive dick between her teeth who's really in
control? Making a guy cum using only my mouth can be quite the ego
booster as well. Some guys claim they can't get off without a hand on
their dick which I take as a personal challenge. I like to think that's
because they've never had ME suck their dick!
********
Q: Is giving a blowjob an act of adultery if one or both of the partners
is married?
A: Technically adultery is defined as the act of having sex when you're
married with someone who is not part of your family without the knowledge
and consent of your spouse. Therefore by letter of the law a blowjob is
can't be adultery because it's not sex as I described in the previous
question. Note that in order to commit adultery you also have to be
married which is pretty obvious but worth pointing out. That said I'm
pretty sure most wives wouldn't be happy if they found out about it so I
don't recommend using this as an excuse if you're caught. My experience
is that most wives don't give a damn about dictionary technicalities when
they catch me sucking their husband's dick!
********
Q: Is adultery wrong?
A: YES, a thousand times YES! Adultery is ALWAYS wrong. After all it's
one of the "Big Ten" written in stone! Because of the severity it's
important to understand exactly what adultery really IS while at the same
time it can be even more important to understand what it's NOT. Knowing
the difference is why I can truthfully say I have never committed
adultery and never will.
As I mentioned previously, adultery is defined as the act of having sex
with someone who is not part of your family without the knowledge and
consent of your spouse. Another way to look at it is the key to adultery
is not so much the ACT of sex but rather the INTENT when the sex takes
place. Just because you have sex outside of your marriage doesn't mean
you're committing adultery. It's only when you hide it from your spouse
or do it against their wishes that it's a sin. Now I don't mean to
say that EVERY act of sex has to be reported to your spouse like some
sort of confessional. The trick is to have their permission ahead of
time so it's the agreements up front that are so critical in marriage.
Oh by the way guys, that applies to a lot more than sex as well!
Another key element to keep in mind is that adultery is only wrong for
the person committing it. That's why I always say a husband can't blame
me for his actions. If a husband cheats on his wife with me then HE's
the one committing adultery, not me. In that situation even though I'm
married I'm not committing adultery because my husband's OK with me
having sex with other people even if I don't ask him about it first or
tell him later.
********
Q: Do you practice safe sex?
A: My mother put me on the pill as soon as I started having sex so far as
birth control goes that's what I've always depended on. When the time
came a couple of years later for me to have sex with my dad for the first
time, even though he'd been fixed after I was born I was glad that I was
on it since feeling him cum inside of me was all part of the overall
incest experience and I didn't want any possible issues with his
vasectomy messing things up. I mention him cumming in me because it
feels so much more intimate to know he is releasing himself in me than
pulling out which would seem to imply that there was something wrong with
what he's doing.
As a rule I hate condoms and view them as being discriminatory against
women. After all what difference does it make to a guy as he gets to
ejaculate either way? It's the woman who gets cheated out of receiving
his cum. In general I only want a guy to wear one when absolutely
necessary to protect against disease. When I was in high school I didn't
make most guys use a condom as I figured the risks were small as I was on
the pill. Please, don't preach to me about STDs. I'm very selective of
my partners and I make a conscious decision in every case.
Along those lines people ask me if I have ever been impregnated by my
father since he never uses a condom when we have sex. First, the very
idea of that is repugnant to me but that's moot as my father simply CAN'T
get me pregnant. My mother almost died when she gave birth to me and so
my dad had a vasectomy to be sure she never got pregnant again. Keep in
mind my mom's definition of adultery is a little more stringent than me
so she never had sex with anyone but her own father after marry my dad
(although I did find out eventually that in private she was doing my
older uncle at times as well). Her father was also fixed after having
two daughters so it was never an issue. I'm not sure if she made my
uncle wear one but I'd bet she did.
********
Q: Does cock size matter?
A: Duh... of course it does! The only people who claim otherwise are the
guys with small ones. Yeah, sometimes I'll tell a guy it doesn't matter
but that's like a guy telling a girl that "anything more than a handful
is a waste". While I'm trying to be polite it's still a line of crap.
All that said, when a guy worries about cock size it tells me that he
doesn't have a clue how to please a girl if he think just a big cock is
going to do it. Of course a larger dick, at least up to a point, feels
better simply because I can feel it filling me more. But to really
please me, all a guy needs to do is get the head in me far enough to rub
against the multitude of nerve endings that are just inside of me.
In other words think of it like eating food. The taste and enjoyment
comes from the taste buds in your mouth but the overall long-term
satisfaction comes from the fullness of your stomach. Of course if you
eat too much your stomach hurts! That's how it is with my pussy. It's
the entrance to my pussy where all the action takes place so far as
stimulation goes. The reason it feels good when a guy strokes me is that
his cock acts like a violin bow playing over the "strings" just inside of
me. When his cock pushes further in me, then it's more the sensation
that he is filling me up, giving me a feeling of general satisfaction I
also enjoy.
Most any cock size within reason can accomplish the first part. Maybe if
I wasn't so tight a larger dick would be better but if anything TOO big a
cock can hurt as it stretches me out to force its way inside of me. When
it comes to filling my pussy the bigger the better to a point after
which, like an overfilled stomach, there's such a thing too much of a
good thing.
The one time when it really does matter to me that a guy is completely in
me is when I have sex with my father. In those times though it's more
about the emotional element than physical. I just love knowing he's all
the way in me when he comes, like he wants to make me a part of him!
********
Q: Do you like anal sex?
A: NO! Do I really have to say more? Of course I do so here goes...
I don't mind my ass being licked and touched but my asshole is strictly
one-way to anyone except me. I've experimented with my finger in the
shower and hot tub and have actually come to enjoy it now and then when I
masturbate. However, anal sex turns me totally off. I don't even like
to discuss it.
And yes, I HAVE done it so don't tell me to try it.
********
Q: Have you had sex with a black guy or any other interracial sex?
A: I don't like this question because it infers that I might choose who
to have sex with based on their race. I've had sex with only a few black
men but that's more due to lack of opportunity than by choice. I really
don't care what color, age, or religion a guy is when it comes to sex as
they all feel the same when they're in me and I can't see any difference
with the lights out.
********
Q: Have you had sex with an animal?
A: Many years ago as a teen I was horny and let my little Yorkie lick my
pussy. Even though she DID make me cum with a little assistance from my
finger, it creeped me out afterwards to think about it so it was the only
time I let her do it.
Once I spent the night with my friend Samantha and found out she was not
only a lesbian but regularly had sex with her golden retriever. Well, I
once again I was horny and one thing led to another until now I can say
that I've sucked a dog and been fucked by one too. That does NOT mean I
want to have ever again have sex with animals, only that I have in the
past.
That was meant to be the last time but there was a party where as part of
the initiation a girl was tasked with doing a dog. She was so freaked I
volunteered to trade with her since I'd already done it once. Now THAT
was the LAST time!
I've always said I've never regretting the things I've done, only the
ones I haven't and that holds true for canine sex but to be perfectly
honest I'm still weirded out about the whole dog sex thing. After all,
it was a freaking DOG that was fucking me! Somehow it just seems all
wrong.
********
Q: Do you have sex during your period?
A: Sex during my period is more a question of hygiene than anything else.
Face it, it can be a mess which is why I think most guys are turned off
by it as well. I've never met anyone who wanted to have oral sex during
my period and I doubt I would go for it anyway - it would be a little
gross for me. I usually don't mind sex so long as we do it somewhere
where it doesn't create a problem - obviously not on a couch or piece of
furniture! Typically that means in bed with an old towel or blanket
under me that can be thrown away afterwards. I find that missionary
works best so you could say I'm a little less adventuresome during that
time.
There are exceptions as some days I cramp and just don't feel well so
naturally I'm not into sex at those times. As for whether it "heightens"
anything... sex is 80-90% mental for me so I guess if it feels any
different it's more because of the fact that I KNOW that I'm on my period
more than from BEING on my period.
********
Q: What is your favorite position?
A: That depends mostly on the situation and who I'm with. As a general
statement I like to start out on top - cowgirl style. Riding a guy gives
me control over the depth of his penetration into me as well as the
speed. Towards the end I'm a sucker for the good old missionary style,
especially when he's planning to cum inside of me. It's the most
intimate of positions for me and I have to admit I enjoy the feeling of
submission as he literally mates me. In between, well that's as much up
to him as anything. I like doggie, spooning, and just about anything
that doesn't hurt me or involve anal penetration.
********
Q: What was your most memorable experience?
A: Well, if you're referring to my entire life, that's an easy question
to answer. That would have to be the day when I accepted Jesus as my
Lord and Savior. I was ten years old at summer youth church camp when my
counselor led me in prayer and I dedicated my life to Jesus. I believe
that experience is also part of the reason why I feel so strongly about
wanting to work with youth. The impact my counselor's actions and
behavior influenced me tremendously and she will always be someone I
respect and admire. My hope is to have that same impact on another
girl's life someday.
That said, I doubt when most people read that question that this was the
answer they were looking for! I admit it was a bit of a trick question
but at the same time before I answer the "real" question about my sex
life I wanted to make a statement about something that means a lot to me.
Had I worded it to be about my religious experiences I doubt most people
would've bothered to read it.
So SEXUALLY I can say definitively that my most memorable experience ever
was the day my dad fucked me for the first time. It was a pivotal moment
in my life after which everything changed in ways that nothing else can
or will ever match, even more than when I lost my virginity. Feeling my
own father's incestuous erection entering me for the first time is
something I'll NEVER forget! Then when he came in me... it's like it's
imprinted in my mind.
********
Q: Do you masturbate? If so, how often?
Yes - of course I do. Seems sort of a silly question actually. Really,
who doesn't? I'm sure the number of true abstainers isn't nearly as
large as the members of that group would like to think.
Masturbation come natural to me, maybe because I was raised to view it as
a perfectly normal and healthy outlet for my sexual energy. My parents
did it frequently (especially my dad) and while they never did it
deliberately in front of me, at the same time they didn't go out of their
way to hide it from me either. Doors were rarely shut in our house so
whatever was going on in a bedroom or bathroom was no secret. I can
remember many times growing up when I would see them and sometimes I even
watched, especially when I was younger and more curious.
As I entered puberty my parents actively encouraged me to masturbate
regularly simply so I could enjoy myself without embarrassment. I really
don't understand it sometimes - almost everyone does it yet for some
reason most people won't admit to doing it without being embarrassed. It
seems to me that it would be a lot better to eliminate the taboos and let
people openly enjoy it than having to sneak around feeling guilty about a
perfectly normal human need that almost EVERYONE does.
As for how often... that depends on a lot of things. If I'm getting the
real thing regularly then naturally not as much so maybe just once a day
or so. Even then it depends on how satisfying it was as I've gone to bed
after a full evening of sex and still felt the need to masturbate before
I went to sleep. When there's nobody around to help, then maybe several
times a day if I'm really horny. Mornings are probably my favorite time
as when I wake up I'm almost always horny and a good rub before a shower
is a great way to start the day.
One thing that most people don't seem to understand, especially guys, is
that for me masturbation is NOT simply a substitution for sex. I really
simply ENJOY masturbating! Even after a good evening of sex I sometimes
do myself after my husband falls asleep simply because I like doing it.
Some people seem to think that by saying they masturbate then they're
confessing to not having regular sex. Not in my book - two different
issues.
********
Q: What do you fantasize about when you masturbate?
A: That really depends on a lot of factors such as the time of day, where
I am, etc. but primarily it's influenced by what I've recently done.
Usually I dream about someone who recently fucked me. Sometimes I may
fantasize about someone I saw at a church youth meeting or service that
turned me on. When I chat with people I often get horny and think about
what might happen if I were to meet with some of the sexier people I chat
with. If there's one thing I do NOT fantasize about, it's porn. Real
life is what turns me on the most, not fake sex with paid actors.
********
Q: What is your favorite fantasy?
A: First, let me make it clear that I do NOT consider fantasies as being
things I dream about in anticipation of ever actually DOING them - that's
dreaming, not fantasizing. A fantasy is just that - a fantasy. That
means it's NOT something I would ever actually do. Some people have
a problem separating reality from fantasy which is why we have so many
perverts and child abusers running around. I understand my
responsibilities as an adult and a woman and would never do anything for
real that would bring harm or abuse to anyone.
OK, enough of the disclaimers. Actually I have a few fantasies which are
quite a bit different from one another. I had a friend go to Amsterdam a
few years ago and she told me about going into a theater where she
watched a couple fucking on stage not three feet away from where she was
sitting in the front row. Ever since then I've fantasized about me being
that girl on stage. It makes me so hot to imagine me being watched by a
hundred or so people, each and every one of them wishing they were the
one fucking me instead of the guy who was actually doing me.
My second fantasy is quite a bit different and while it may offend some
people, keep in mind my attitude about fantasies - anything is OK so long
as you can separate fantasy from reality. That said, I like to imagine
baby-sitting a thirteen year-old boy and his twelve year-old sister where
I introduce them to their first sexual encounter. First I would do each
of them separately. Then I would bring them together and teach the girl
to suck her brother's dick after which I would help the boy to fuck his
sister. There's a story about this in the FANTASY section of my web site
if you're interested in the details! Again, keep in mind this is only a
FANTASY of mine and that I would NEVER do such a thing in real life!!!!
Finally, I like to imagine that somehow a man takes control of me be it
by hypnosis or drugs such that I'm aware of what's happening but can't
control myself. No matter what he tells me to do, I can't stop myself
from doing it. This fantasy is fun because it has so many possibilities
- use your own imagination!
So as a final word, if nothing else then remember this... it's perfectly
OK to fantasize about anything and by that I really mean ANYTHING no
matter how disgusting or perverted. It's what you DO as a result of
those fantasies that counts. If a guy ignores his wife sexually because
he spends too much time fantasizing while looking at Internet then yes,
those fantasies are bad.
********
Q: Why do you like to have sex with married men?
A: Marriage is a unique and special relationship where love and respect
by both partners is essential. Personally I do NOT condone adultery.
I've had many men write me and ask my opinion on how to cheat on their
wives and in every case I've responded initially by encouraging them NOT
to do so. Most men rationalize their behavior by saying their wife isn't
interested in sex or she doesn't please him sexually to which I say, "It
takes two".
Although in a perfect world men would not cheat on their wives, should a
man choose to commit adultery then that's HIS decision and HIS
responsibility. I feel NO responsibility whatsoever for the consequences
he may face if his wife finds out. The ONLY way his wife could ever know
about what he did with me is if he does something stupid.
I'm really not a vicious person and I honestly have no desire to hurt
anyone or to cause marital problems. The fact a man is cheating on his
wife is proof enough for me that severe marital issues already exist. I
like to think that I am providing him a means to realize his unfilled
dreams and purge them from his system. Who knows, maybe having sex with
me could end up HELPING their marriage! My hope is that I have saved far
more marriages than have been hurt. Even if something bad does happen
then odds were it was going to happen sooner or later with someone else
if not me so it's not like I'm personally to blame.
Since the first time I has sex a married man at the age of fifteen I've
found that having sex with someone else's a husband to be incredibly
erotic more so than just "pleasurable". What I mean is that while
normally I would claim that sex is 80% emotional and 10% physical, when
doing it with a cheating husband it's 95% emotional and 5% or less about
the physical side of sex, at least for me.
The reason for the heavy emphasis on the "emotional" aspects of sex is
that when a husband is fucking me and I feel his cock inside of me, I
know that his wife is sitting at home totally unaware that her husband is
out fucking a girl probably half her age. It makes me feel really good
as a woman to know that her "loving" husband's lust for me is so intense
that he's willing to violate his most sacred vows to her. It's such a
turn on for me knowing that he's literally ready to sacrifice his
marriage and family just for the opportunity to have sex with ME for a
few hours. So it doesn't seem fair to blame me for feeling incredibly
sexy and desirable in this situation.
It's not just having sex with him that turns me on either. Afterwards
I'll often masturbate as I imagine him returning home and facing his wife
with his adulterous dick still coated with my pussy cum as he kisses her
goodnight and gets into bed with her. When he says he loves her does he
think about what he just did with me? The next time they make love is it
my pussy he remembers when he cums? When his wife turns up her nose at
the thought of oral sex does he wish I was there to suck his cock once
again? Does he feel guilty because he had sex me behind his wife's back?
Will he ever be able to forget what he did with me or will I be a part of
his life - and marriage, for the rest of his days? Does he masturbate
thinking about how good it felt to feel my mouth on his dick and then
drive his erect cock in me? As you can see it goes way beyond just the
few minutes or hours we spend together.
One of my most memorable experiences with a married man was having sex
with a husband while he was on the phone talking to his wife. Just as I
felt him start to shoot his sperm inside my pussy he told his loving wife
back home that he loved her more than anything and couldn't wait to be
back home again. He kept repeating his love for her over and over as he
came deep inside of me. As you might imagine, it wasn't just his cock
ejaculating in me that made me cum so hard! All I could think about was
his wife smiling at home, thinking her loyal husband loved her when what
he was really loving was the feel of my tight pussy clamping down on his
adulterous erect cock as he pumped me with the sperm that SHOULD have
been in her pussy instead!!
For a more complete answer see my article on sex with married men named
"FAQ - Married Guys.txt".
********
Q: Do you like three-somes?
A: Outside of my family and ignoring sex parties I've only had sex with
multiple partners a few times and two of those were with the same people.
(my roomie Brenda and her older brother). Like I said, that ignores the
parties I've been to where I've had sex with quite a few guys but those
were just for my own sexual pleasure. I prefer being the center of
attention but I fantasize a LOT about being with another couple,
especially one where they've been married for a long time and had done
anything like this before they met me.
Probably the times I enjoy a threesome the most are with my family. I
remember being between my parents in their bed and how wonderful that was
for me. Now I feel the same when I can be with my mom and my husband.
I'd LOVE to be able to enjoy my husband and his mother together but
unfortunately I doubt that will ever happen - long story...
********
Q: Why do you describe making love as "fucking"?
A: I try not to swear but I like use the word to denote having sex with
someone other than my husband. For example, I love my dad but he is my
father, NOT my "lover". Thus my father "fucks" me instead of "making
love" to me. Some people get turned off by the word "fuck" but as I
said, it's not my intent to be vulgar, just descriptive.
The ONLY man I make love to is my husband. Period. Everyone else I fuck
which includes my father.
********
Q: You often mention porn. Do you watch it often?
A: Personally porn doesn't do much for me. I find watching an actor
fucking a whore to be about as sensual and erotic as watching dogs do it
(don't EVEN go there!). That's not to say I don't like nude photos and
sex videos but only when they involve me or someone I know. Think of it
like watching typical home movies. You don't mind watching your own but
who really enjoys watching someone else's?
Over the years my dad has gathered a huge porn collection with more
emphasis on videos since they became available. When I was growing up he
would watch them on our large screen TV in the family room so yes, I was
exposed to it at an early age. My mom didn't complain so long as there
was nothing else on TV she'd rather watch and so I followed her example.
The one GOOD thing about porn is I've learning quite a few techniques
from watching it, especially the "classics". The older porn stars from
back in the 70's and 80's were particular instructive as they put on a
show rather than just fucking the same way every time like the boring and
repetitive "reality" porn of today. I mean does anyone really believe
that those "casting" and "interview" porn videos are real?
********
Q: What is "off-limits" for you when it comes to sex?
A: Let me first differentiate between fantasy sex and reality to answer
this. So long as it's just fantasy there's not much that's out of bounds
for me. Even so, I DO have limits. Some of the things I don't like
under ANY circumstance, even fantasy. These would include scat or
watersports or anything to do with bathroom sex in general as I find
these topics disgusting. I also don't like bondage or anything where
someone is being forced to do something they don't want. I definitely am
turned off by child abuse. Sexual contact of any kind with infants and
toddlers grosses me out. Bestiality is not my thing either other than
morbid curiosity. Other than that, so long as it's purely fantasy, I
can't think of anything else that would offend me.
Even though I may not enjoy hearing about it, that doesn't mean I judge
people or condemn them for whatever their fantasies may be no matter how
gross or perverted. At the same time I insist on the same respect in
that I don't have to listen to anything I don't want to either. It seems
there is someplace out there for every form of fetish so find someone who
is into it as a much as you are - just not me.
Real life is a different matter entirely. Anal is not something I enjoy
and while I've allowed it to happen it wasn't like I asked for it and it
was more something I had to put up under the circumstances. Rape is a
horrible offense against a woman and I would never participate or
encourage it. Scat, BSDM, extreme pedophilia, anything to do with
toilet-related activities... all things like these are NOT for me. Also,
as I mentioned briefly before, I have no desire to have sex again with
any animal - what I've done already has been more than enough to satisfy
my curiosity.
********
Q: Do you like public sex? If so, where do you enjoy it the most?
A: Public sex can really be a turn-on, especially when I can see people
around us but they don't know we're doing it like in a store standing
behind a clothes rack looking out with him behind me. Restaurants are
fun places to tease the waiters or drive-thru window servers. I love sex
in the water at a crowded beach with people all around us and either not
noticing us or if they do, not believing we are actually doing it. Not
looking to be arrested but I love the look anywhere we do it if someone
sees us and can't decide if it's really happening! Places like dressing
rooms are OK but since there's no interaction with anyone else it doesn't
reach the same level for me. I also enjoy it when we have sex and then
go out and people can tell we did it, like I blow him in a theater and
walk out with cum on my face. As I said, the key is to see how far you
can go without getting arrested!
Chapter 3 - Incest
==================
Q: Do you really have sex with your family?
A: In a word... YES. Like, why do people make this out to be such a big
deal? It's just sex after all, right? While I wholeheartedly believe in
the value of incest when practiced properly, you may find that my
thoughts and opinions regarding the practice are not exactly what you
might expect.
First and foremost, I STRONGLY oppose child abuse. I fully recognize
that many people use incest as a rationalization for having sex with
young girls and boys such that it starts and ends with one goal in mind -
satisfying their own lust at the expense of another. This is not at all
what I'm talking about as it has no relationship to what I call "true
incest" which is based on love and respect. Of course lust and desire
always play a role when it comes to any form of sex but those should be
part of the benefits rather than the drivers.
Next, I believe that whenever possible everyone in the family should
participate and do so willingly. Trying to hide what is going on from
one of the kids or worse, a spouse or parent, can only lead to an
atmosphere of distrust and deceit. This goes directly against what I
described as my view of proper incest. Eventually they will find out and
nothing good can result when it's rooted in deception. Even if they
eventually decide to join in there will always be the memory of being
left out and deceived.
It should go without saying that there is more involved here than just
sex; there is the issue of the entire attitude toward sexuality and love
that must be present. Therefore I do NOT believe incest can work in most
family situations. Fortunately for some, when the right circumstances
come together it can develop into a wonderful and loving relationship.
I'm fortunate enough to have that type of relationship with my family.
At the same time I'm not so naive as to believe that what I have would
work for many other families.
To be on the safe side, I generally advise anyone who asks me to NOT get
involved with incest unless they were absolutely 100% sure that it would
work as the consequences if it doesn't can be terrible. It's far better
to err on the safe side than ruin people's lives - including your own.
Incest should be the RESULT of the love in a relationship, not the
driver. As an example I love my parents and I know they loved me
unconditionally as well. If I never had sex with them again I know in my
heart that their love would not be one iota different than it is today.
The key is that I do not NEED to have sex with my parents for them to
know that I love them nor for me to know that they love me. I WANT to
do it BECAUSE I love them and want to be the daughter I should be.
The point I want to conclude with is that I've had sex with my parents
simply as a means to express my love in a way that all of us can enjoy
and share with one another. Honestly, why should I NOT let my dad fuck
me? Why deprive myself of the incredible sensation of my own father
cumming inside of me? What could be more wonderful than laying in my bed
with my father's cock throbbing inside me, my pussy filled with the sperm
he has just given me, and his arms around me holding me tightly against
him in the most intimate manner way a father and his daughter can be
together?
The same goes for when I'm with my mother. Our naked bodies pressed
tightly together, our pussies rubbing against each other's, perhaps with
a double dildo joining them, is simply the most wonderful way a mother
and daughter can be together.
Enough said!!!!
********
Q: You claim to be a Christian so how can you have sex with your parents?
A: Actually the question is terribly misleading as it implies that as a
Christian I should NOT be involved in incest. Personally I see it as
exactly the opposite.
From Exodus 20 and the Ten Commandments:
Commandment #5: Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be
long.
Commandment #7: Thou shalt not commit adultery.
Before sending me a thesis correcting my interpretation of the Bible,
this is how I feel about it and I'm not going to debate it... You see it
seems pretty straightforward to me. I honor my parents, especially my
father, by giving them everything I have which includes my body if they
so desire. After all, what greater sign of respect and honor can a
daughter give to her parents than to offer her own body in total
submission without any restraints or conditions? It would be pretty
hypocritical of me to claim that I truly honor and respect my parents if
I was to deny my body to them.
The key to the following the 7th Commandment is to properly understanding
the concept of adultery. The most simplistic definition which works for
many people is to say that adultery is engaging in the act of sex with
someone who is not your spouse. However, in many cases that is being
overly simplistic can lead to misunderstandings.
First, such a simple definition does not address incest. In my view when
you marry someone you "marry" into their family as well. Sex within a
marriage is not adultery (duh!) so that would include having sex with
everyone in your marriage "family".
Second, adultery is just a fancy word for cheating. Thus so long as you
don't cheat then you aren't committing adultery.
The only conclusion must be that sex outside of marriage is OK so long as
everyone agrees. Seems simple enough to me that if your spouse doesn't
care, why would God?
Of course I realize that there many people disagree with my definitions
and interpretations. Heck, my own mother is one of them. She raised me
to believe that God clearly states that you shall NOT commit adultery no
matter what the rationalization. For her that means it doesn't matter
who on Earth agrees - God doesn't and he holds all the trump cards.
Until I agreed to marry my husband and found that he felt differently, I
agreed with my mom because there was no reason to question her reasoning.
However, now I'm a wife and thus what my husband says carries more weight
than my mother's decrees.
While we may disagree on the technicalities, my mom and I DO agree on one
thing and that is that adultery is wrong. The only difference is how we
define it and who is to say which of us is right? Maybe we both are!
********
Q: Are you really married?
A: Yes. On August 27, 2011 I married Steve who was also my very first
official boyfriend I that he took my virginity when I was fourteen. Five
years later I can still say that it was the best thing I've ever done.
Not a day goes by that I don't love being married to this guy more than
the day before. Steve is the most loving and adoring husband any woman
could hope for, not to mention almost being a caring father for our
daughters.
I truly believe in my heart that our marriage is blessed by God. How
else could it have happened the way it did without His hand guiding us?
When I was fourteen Steve had to leave me after we'd dated for only about
six months when his mother was transferred to southern California. At
the time I thought I'd never see him again and in fact he even married
someone else for a brief time. It was annulled after less than a week
and I like to think my being at the wedding had a lot to do with him
realizing the terrible mistake he'd made. Then his mom was transferred
back to Pittsburgh a couple of years ago and the rest is history! It was
truly a miracle by any definition.
********
Q: Does your husband know about your incestuous sex life?
A: Well duh! Of course he does. Like how could I possibly marry a man
keeping that sort of a thing secret? Given that I could never abandon my
obligations to my father there was no way I could marry a man unless he
could accept that part of my life as part of the package. There's no way
you can hide that sort of thing for long nor should you. Indeed, I
learned THAT painful lesson from my Aunt Linda who tried that and look
where it led - to a bitter divorce a few years later.
After a really bad past experience with another guy I thought would be
my husband I didn't tell Steve anything until I was sure that he was
about to propose to me. As much as he knew about my past sex life, this
was the one thing he just couldn't believe and thought I was playing some
form of practical joke on him. In the end I had to have him hide in the
closet and watch while my dad fucked me in order to convince him.
********
Q: How does your husband feel about your family sex life?
A: Steve accepts it now and had come to embrace it but he wasn't thrilled
by it at first. By that I mean he acknowledged my spiritual obligations
as a daughter and why I felt that must submit myself to my father as part
of my religious beliefs. As important he also understood that what I
do with my father is as his DAUGHTER and never as his lover or anything
kinky or perverted. So long as he is the only man in the world who makes
love to me, Steve can deal with my sexual involvement with my dad even
though he isn't a part of it. It's always been a little ironic to me
that while Steve normally goes out of his way to watch me having sex with
other guys, the one man he prefers not watch fuck me is my own dad.
One benefit Steve gets by virtue of being married to an incest girl is
that he is free to have sex with my mother, aunt and cousins as they are
part of our marital family. Even though they don't share a blood
relationship I still consider it to be incest as they are all part of our
marriage family.
Interestingly, my husband's younger brother and sister live together as a
married couple. It's something I know both he and his mother had a
difficult time accepting but family is family and so they have dealt with
it and come to embrace it.
Given his feelings on the subject, it's rather ironic that my husband was
the first person I ever personally witnessed in a incestual act. ONCE
back when we were dating he had sex with his mother but it wasn't like
that opened the flood gates for an incestual mother-son relationship. In
fact it seemed to create just the opposite effect as I never saw the two
of them do it again until Father's Day last year. By the way, read my
diary for October 5, 1999 if you're interested in what happened back then
between Steve and his mom.
********
Q: Will you have sex with your daughters?
A: I get asked this a lot and while I'd like to be able to answer
definitively one way or the other I simply can't. My own life in the
past couple of years is testimony to how so much can happen beyond what
you may have expected.
For example until a few years ago I would've told you I'd never commit
adultery. While I still haven't, it's not the same as I would have
thought back then. At the time I was guided by a rather simplistic
definition that my mom had taught me where adultery was sex outside of
marriage regardless of whether your spouse approves or not. Then Steve
started insisting that we get heavily involved with the swapping scene so
I was forced to look at things a little differently. It's important to
note that I have NOT changed my view that adultery is wrong, I've just
come to understand that my earlier definition of adultery was overly
simplistic and not applicable to my marriage. A cynical person might say
that I rationalized a compromise to my principles but I take exception to
that. Everyone grows and matures both in body and mind and I'm no
different.
Adultery is just one example of a principle that I would've sworn I'd
never change but then learned such thinking was naive. It wasn't all
that long ago I wouldn't have dreamed of having sex with anyone underage
but that all changed as well after I married Steve and learned of his
desires (perhaps "needs" is a more apt description) for young girls.
Yes, I guess you could say in many ways I "married my father" in that
Steve and my dad share many of the same desires and needs. I don't mean
that in a negative sense as it's not like he chases little girls at the
mall or playground, tempting them with candy to lure them into his van.
Everything my husband does is with the full consent and supervision of
the child's parents but even so it's still something I never would've
considered getting involved with. Yet like adultery, I came to realize
that the simplistic definitions that worked when I was single had to be
adjusted for the reality of married life.
So with all that said... do I want my daughters to carry on the incest
tradition of our family into a third generation? Duh, of course I do! I
truly feel it will make our family stronger so we'll just have to see how
it plays out in the upcoming years. Considering his attraction to young
girls today I can't see Steve not taking advantage of the opportunity
once he has a nubile pair of young daughters available to him every day.
So to be clear, I HOPE my family will be able to realize the benefits of
incest but at the same time if it doesn't happen then I would accept it
as God's plan for me. In any case, it's not something I intend to force
one way or the other but rather I will let God and Mother Nature dictate
the course.
One thing I do know and that's for now my girls are too young for sex and
I can't see THAT principle EVER changing. They're simply too young to
even comprehend what sex is! Someday though my girls will grow up and
enter puberty when things will be different. I fully anticipate that
based on my example and teaching that they will honor their father with
the gift of their virginity, an honor I was not allowed to give to my
father for which I'll always regret. My hope is they will allow me to
participate or at least watch. Still, all that's many years away so
nothing for me to worry myself to death about now.
********
Q: Did your parents swing?
A: No, they never did, at least not once they were married. I find it
intriguing to consider the underlying stereotyping that is taking place
when people ask me this question. The assumption seems to be that just
because they enjoyed incest that they must be immoral or otherwise sexual
predators. Well, nothing could have been further from the truth! My
parents were the most moral and decent people I know with the highest
principles and ethics. They would never have had sex with anyone outside
their immediate family as that would have been an act of infidelity in
their eyes.
While I say "never", there WERE a couple of exceptions to this rule as my
father is still a man and all men have urges that they can't always
control. Interestingly enough each time involved best friends - my BFF
Beth and my mom's best friend Tammy. These were truly exceptions to the
rule and I think while my dad enjoyed it at the time, afterwards he felt
extremely guilty. My mother, bless her heart, didn't condemn him or even
try to stop him even when it happened right in front of her. Is it any
wonder their marriage lasted over 25 years given that sort of love and
understanding between them?
********
Q: Do you prefer having sex with your mother or father the most?
A: Tough question because there's no easy answer. After having sex with
my parents for almost fifteen years now, I can honestly say that I love
them both now more than ever. However sex is a completely different
experience with each of them making it like trying to compare apples and
oranges.
Sexually speaking I've spent the most time with my dad rather than my mom
when it comes to sex, probably 95% or more in fact. While my mom enjoyed
watching us at times because she knew what it meant to my dad and me to
be together that way, only rarely did she actually get involved. That
was important to me because people need to understand that in a healthy
incestual relationship it's not about lust but instead it's an act of
family love and respect. People who think we had 3-somes every night are
influenced by pornography and various web sites that cater to male
fantasies. As such they don't understand the true emotions and ethics
involved in "real" incest.
My father has always been wonderful to me and has provided me with
everything I've ever asked for and more. I owe him so much for all that
I have that I could never hope to repay him. He loves me unconditionally
and while I know he doesn't expect anything from me in return at least I
can give him the most precious gift I have - my sexuality.
From a biblical perspective it's my duty and obligation to submit to my
father. I don't mean in some form of kinky dom/sub way but similar to
the way I submit myself to God. NO, I do not worship my father, I'm just
trying to make a point. No matter what the time or place I take great
pride in that I've NEVER turned down my dad when he has needed me no
matter how I was feeling or what I needed to do at the time. OK, so
maybe I'm not nearly so good when it comes to other things but in terms
of submitting myself to him sexually, I could never say no to him.
When it comes to sex with my dad I think it's vitally important for
people to understand that we love each other as any father and daughter
should. There has NEVER been anything kinky between us. By that I mean
no pretending that we're "lovers" or anything even remotely perverted
like that. He is my dad and I am his daughter - period. I wish people
would realize that I don't fuck my dad just to have sex. Of course I
enjoy it so there's an element of personal pleasure but I can get laid
just about anytime I want so I don't need my dad to meet my sexual needs.
It's also crucial to emphasize that my dad has NEVER forced me to do
anything and in no way has he ever abused me in any way. Despite his
desires before then he never pushed me to have sex with him. Instead, I
was the one that initiated our first time not realizing that I was
fulfilling one of his deepest wishes. I know that if I ever told him to
stop he would not question me and that he would love me just the same.
Simply put, I offer myself to my dad for his pleasure and sexual needs
out of my love and respect for him.
The sexual relationship I have with my mom is totally different from the
one I have with my dad which is why we rarely have sex as a family. My
dad fucks me because he loves me as his daughter. Our sex is more
physical in that mutual pleasure is our goal. With my mom there was a
much deeper emotional fulfillment - for both of us.
You may have noticed that while I have a lot of diary stories about me
and my dad, there are only a few of me and my mom. Having sex with my
mom has always been an incredibly personal and intimate relationship; one
I believe that is something unique that could only happen between a
mother and her daughter. Although my relationship with my husband is
similar in some ways, overall it's totally different because he's a man
and my sexual mate.
I said that my dad is NOT my lover which is totally true. However when
my mom and I have sex we become lovers in every sense of the word. It's
incredibly passionate to the point where it becomes almost overwhelming.
I love the feel of her warm naked body pressed against mine. Licking her
hairy pussy, the same pussy where I was conceived and born is so erotic
for me. When she runs her tongue on my wet musky pussy hole I think
about how it's the same place her husband and my father loves to fuck me
and it turns me on so much! These and more experiences fill my soul and
complete me as a woman in a way not even my husband can do.
So who did I like better? Well it's a no-decision. Both of my parents
are wonderful and I enjoy being with them both, each in their own way.
********
Q: Have you told anyone about your incestual relationships?
A: The only people who really know are some members of my family and my
BFF, Beth. The only other time I've ever discussed incest outside of my
family is on-line with people who do not know who I really am - also a
good reason for not meeting them. There was one boyfriend to whom I
revealed our family secret but he was involved with his sister at the
time so it wasn't like he freaked out or anything.
Over time the discipline to avoid discussing it outside my family has
become well ingrained in me. You may have noticed that in my diary I
don't usually refer to my family when I talk about sexual experiences
that occur outside of my family. For instance, in the story where when I
talk about my first time with my roomie Brenda, I describe her as my
"first" lesbian experience. This isn't 100% accurate as I was having sex
with my mother and aunt for years prior to Brenda. Still, given that
Brenda was the first girl outside of my family that I had sex with I
consider her my "first".
********
Q: Were your parents involved in incest with their families?
A: My father's family comes from a traditional mid-west farming stock.
Sex was not even discussed let alone openly practiced and incest would've
been considered a sinful perversion in accordance with the laws of their
strict Protestant upbringing. All that didn't stop my father and his
brothers from being typical horny teenage boys. According to my dad all
three of them had their share of "conquests" during their high school
years and he considers it a miracle to this day that none of them got a
girl pregnant. However, none of that included their mother!
As for my dad specifically, he first had sex when he was fifteen with
some girl from school his age. After sowing his oats with a few more
girls he started having sex with a fourteen year-old freshman who would
someday be my mom. Unknown to my dad at the time, she and her younger
sister each had their virginity taken from them by their father a couple
of years earlier. My grandfather did my mom's younger sister the day
after he first did my mom. My Aunt Linda was only in seventh grade at
the time but it would've been hard to do one daughter without the other
finding out. In any case, it's not like she was a virgin at the time.
It wasn't until my dad proposed that my mom revealed to him that it was
her father who'd been her first and that she and her sister had been
fucking their father regularly ever since, including the entire time that
they'd been dating my dad. Needless to say he was a bit surprised!
My mom accepted his marriage proposal but only on the condition that he
allow her to maintain her incestual relationships with her father and
sister. Well, as open-minded and promiscuous as my dad considered
himself to be, he was naturally a bit shocked at the news since incest
was not something he was raised to even think about other than maybe
during a few fantasies. He once told me that what helped him to accept
it was that she told him that even though they got married he could
continue fucking her sister since she was part of her family. They got
married and things obviously worked out because as their marriage lasted
over twenty five years.
Aunt Linda eventually married under the same conditions with her fianc‚
that my mother insisted on except for her things didn't work out so well.
Her husband grew possessive and soon after my cousin was born he demanded
that she stop fucking her brother-in-law and have sex only with him like
a "normal" wife. They finally ended up divorcing over the issue although
for obvious reasons the real cause for the divorce was kept confidential.
My grandfather died unexpectedly from a heart attack a number of years
back so the only guy my mom had after that was my dad except for my dad's
older brother Paul, a relationship she kept to herself through her entire
marriage. It wasn't until he approached me and we had sex that I learned
about it.
Prior to her generation my mom doesn't know of any other incestual
relationships. Unfortunately even though she had sex with her dad she
and he didn't have the same day-to-day relationship I enjoy with my
father where we talked about everything and anything so if grandpa knew
of anything, he never told her. Mom told me that she let her dad fuck
her primarily because he was her father and she wanted to please him but
wished she had the same emotional bond with him that I had with my dad.
My grandmother knew all along what her husband was doing with her
daughters. She never participated in any way though as she did not enjoy
girl-girl sex and frankly wasn't into seeing her husband fucking anyone
else, especially their own daughters. My mom once told me that she
wondered what it would have been like if they had a brother...
My mom and I have discussed her relationship with Grandma often over the
years and I can tell she regrets that she never was as close to her
mother the way I am to mine.
********
Q: Did you ever consider bearing your father's child?
A: Oh my god NO - a thousand times NO!
First, no disrespect to those who have different feelings on the matter.
I know of several people who have had their father's child and it worked
out well. I just ask that my own feelings be given the same respect and
consideration.
So far as I'm concerned, just the thought of having a child with my dad
is repulsive. If there's one thing I try to make clear to people is that
no matter what I do or don't do with my dad, I am ALWAYS his daughter. I
NEVER even role-play as his lover, concubine, mistress or whatever else
you want to call it. I have sex with my father to please him and satisfy
his needs because I love him and it's my duty as his daughter to do
whatever it takes to honor HIM, NOT to bear his children.
Of course, the question is really moot until someone figures out how to
reverse a vasectomy, LOL.
********
Q: Do you wish you'd had a brother or sister? Which one the most?
A: There are pros and cons to being an only child. Of course I'd love to
have had a brother or sister but I also realize I'm only thinking about
the good side of the equation. Many of my friends who DO have a brother
or sister might have a different response.
If I could have my wish then my first choice would be an older brother.
Older because he would have been more mature when I was younger. Then
too as I said earlier I prefer guys but my second choice would be a
younger sister. Younger because I wouldn't want hand-me-downs plus I
would want to be the one in charge. I am thinking more in terms of us
being with my dad together than just the two of us.
********
Q: Do you have any regrets concerning anything you have done sexually?
A: Honestly I can't think of anything I HAVE done that I really regret.
Not that there are a few that I wouldn't have been disappointed had I not
done them, LOL. There are things I won't do again but I don't necessarily
regret having done them. A prime example would be getting fucked by a
dog. I don't regret trying it but now that I've experienced it a couple
of times I would NEVER do it again.
Actually what bothers me the most, at least sexually, are the things that
I've NOT done. If there is one thing I'll always feel bad about is that
I didn't give my father my virginity. When I first had sex with my
boyfriend I had absolutely no idea whatsoever that my father had any
interest in me sexually so there was nothing I could've done differently
then. Even so, it still bothers me that I gave it to someone else when
now I know how badly he wanted to be the one. The one good thing I can
say is that I respect him so much for allowing me to make the decision,
unlike my grandfather made the decision for my mother and her sister
without even asking them first.
I also regret not having sex with any of my teachers. While I'm sure it
was probably the right call at the time, sometimes I can't help but look
back and wonder what it would have been like.
Just one more point I want to make. Even though I understand now the
real reasons why my father wanted me as a teenager, I still don't regret
for a moment anything that we did. If anything I feel even more proud
that I was able to give him what he needed such that he didn't give in to
his addictions and go out to do something he would have come to regret
later. I'm happy and proud that I was there for him whenever he needed
me most. As his daughter I always will be there for him no matter what
inner demons he has to deal with.
********
Q: Should parents allow their children to see them making love?
A: In theory I would have no problem with this as what better way for
children to witness the love of their parents demonstrated so openly and
clearly? However in real life thing doesn't always go as they
theoretically could. While I won't say that parents should never allow
their children to watch them, I just don't think that it's proper unless
they're old enough to understand.
Like many things in my life my principles and guiding ethics have
Changed over time, sometimes more than once for the same subject. Things
I once was thought were dead wrong became less black and white when it
came time to actually have to deal with those situation. For example I
considered sex outside your family when married to be wrong until I was
married and learned that was exactly what my husband expected of me.
Similarly, I considered sex with underage children to be wrong until my
father wanted me to go with him to a family party.
Perhaps the best example of me struggling to come to terms with an issue
revolves around having our daughters watch us having sex. I never even
rally gave it much thought as it seemed so obvious ? no! This principle
was challenged by my husband recently and for a short time I was able to
rationalize allowing our daughter to be with us when we had sex to the
point of even allowing their father to rub against her and effective
masturbate until he came on her. My mother would never have condoned
such a thing and at first I thought she was wrong about this just as she
was wrong to stop my father from having me when I was younger. It wasn't
until I saw how quickly the situation escalated, not to mention what some
really weird people were telling me on-line when I mentioned it in a
diary entry, that I had to acknowledge that mother was right and returned
to my original position. So now our daughters no longer watch their
parents making love.
I guess maybe that needs more explanation... Well when a married couple
makes love that is an intimate moment between the two of them and as such
it's not a spectator sport for someone else's amusement, let alone their
children. I never saw my parent's making love when I was growing up
until I was sixteen and started having sex with them. The fact I didn't
SEE them having sex didn't mean I didn't know what they were doing as the
walls in our old house were pretty thin. I didn't have to see them doing
it to know they loved one another passionately. I use to TALK about sex
with my mom and dad all the time but it wasn't necessary for me to SEE
anything. Having your kids watch you may be something that isn't
forbidden... but ask yourself is it REALLY necessary? All I know is that
in our family, the answer is "no".
********
Q: Should parents allow their children to see them masturbating?
A: When it comes to doing things in front of people, including your kids,
masturbation is a totally different concern than sex. First,
masturbation is NOT sex but just a natural reaction to the feelings and
needs everyone experiences. Heck, even primates masturbate! As such
it's not something that should be portrayed as being taboo or something
to be ashamed of. Masturbation is a natural human reaction that just
about everyone does so why teach your kids that they have to run off and
hide when the need arises?
While I don't believe in hiding it, a little discretion and modesty never
hurt anyone. For the most part I don't think the person doing it needs
to make a show out of it or draw undue attention to themselves if for no
other reason than just to be polite and exercise good manners. Now if
you're having sex and trying to turn on your partner, that's different.
Still, just because I might see a hot guy on TV and felt the need didn't
mean getting down on the family room floor naked and frigging myself in
front of my parents. They knew what I was doing on the couch between my
legs so why make a big deal about it?
To me it's really a matter INTENT. While putting on a show for your kids
would be rather perverted in my opinion yet at the same time parents
shouldn't have to refrain from masturbating just because their kids are
around. Yes, it may be a fine distinction but to me it's an important
one.
So for now I masturbate the same as I ever have, whether or not my
daughters are present. So far there hasn't been any interest shown, nor
have I expected there to be any.
********
Q: What should parents teach their kids about sex?
A: As a general rule when it comes to learning anything about their
bodies and sexual natures I believe the best source is always the parent.
That means not the schools and definitely not in church where far too
many different and conflicting agendas are in play. While I agree that
sex education serves a purpose in public school, it's only a necessary
evil as far too many parents abstain from their responsibilities. In
such cases it should be limited to the physical concerns including
avoidance of STDs and pregnancy and NOT deal with moral and ethical
issues.
It's crucial that children learn about sex as soon as possible taking
into consideration their maturity and family status. At the same time
there's no need to teach a six-year old boy about masturbation when he
doesn't have a clue what you're talking about and can't relate to the
feelings you're trying to describe. Later when he starts to show signs
of being interested in what's "down there", that's when his father should
instruct him about the "birds and the bees" which should include
masturbation. And yes, I'm a little old-fashioned in that I believe a
father should teach his son and a mother her daughter.
The same applies to girls. No girl should be made to suffer the
indignity and humiliation of having her first period in school without
knowing what to do but yet that very thing happens much too often. When
she approaches puberty her mother should teach her about sex, including
masturbation. It also wouldn't hurt to explain sex and how to make her
first time an enjoyable and memorable experience, not like what happens
to way too many naive girls. Safe sex for both sexes should be a MUST
when it comes to discussing sex, including how to use a condom and other
available birth control options.
********
Q: Did you really believe that parents should encourage their kids to
masturbate?
A: Well why not? Really, what's the big deal anyway? In my opinion, one
of the biggest failures of our society is that we teach our kids that
masturbation is wrong and somehow perverted yet at the same time 99% of
adults do it on a regular basis! It would be like telling kids not to
smoke but then sneaking a cigarette at night after they go to bed.
Even though masturbation is NOT sex our general culture has linked the
two together thereby implying that if kids masturbate then they'll be
driven to have sex. Sort of like the concept that if you smoke marijuana
then you'll soon be using heroin. Hey parents, news flash! Your kids
ARE going to have sex whether or not they masturbate and by the way, they
DO masturbate whether you know it or not. I don't care how innocent you
think your daughter is, if she's fifteen she's probably been doing it for
years and the same goes for your son.
When I say encourage masturbation I want to emphasize that this doesn't
mean making it a spectator sport. As I've said about parents
masturbating with their kids around, your children shouldn't have to
sneak off to the bathroom to masturbate when they're horny. Why do we
make them leave the room as if what they need to do is naughty? At the
same time it provides a great opportunity to teach discretion. For
instance, masturbating during dinner is rude (no different than texting)
and doing it in church can raise all sorts of problems so kids should
learn there ARE limits. Then again, if it's during a long car ride and
it helps them to cope with their boredom, why say anything if they choose
to do it to keep themselves occupied?
Overall I don't mean that you should ENCOURAGE your kids to masturbate so
much as provide them with a positive and encouraging home environment
where they are ALLOWED to pleasure themselves without having to feel
embarrassed or fearful. It's been said that you can lead a horse to
water but you can't make him drink. Well, provide your kids a safe
environment and then it's up them. If they don't want to masturbate in
front of you, respect that as well and don't push them to do it. They
may change their minds someday but maybe not. In either case why should
it make any difference to you as their parent?
********
Q: Who should take a girl's virginity?
A: First and foremost it should be whoever SHE wants to give it to.
Nobody should ever "take? someone's virginity be it a girl or a boy.
From a purely sentimental view I think a father should do it simply
because he IS her father and as such deserves the honor. If for some
reason he can't or doesn't want to then that's his choice. For younger
girls I believe it's better to keep sex in the family so it could be her
brother, uncle or cousin or even a boyfriend around her age if she wants
to do it early. If she chooses to wait until she's older then it could
be any adult she wants. I favor the "family option" only because the
odds of it being an enjoyable experience improve dramatically for obvious
reasons.
Putting sentiment aside, a girl should lose her virginity to the first
guy she feels she's ready to fuck. Odds are that he'll be a boy from
school or church, NOT someone from her family.
********
Q: Who should take a boy's virginity?
A: As with a girl, from a purely sentimental view I think the mother
should just because she IS his mother and like a father with his
daughter, a mother has earned the honor.
Once again, pitting aside the sentiment it should be a girl around his
age from outside the family. I'm not so sure it's as important from an
emotional perspective for a boy as to who he does it the first time with
as it is for a girl.
********
Q: Would should kids be allowed to have sex with each other?
A: This may seem like a cop-out but I have to say that would be up to
them but that I would hope that they felt comfortable enough with each
other to where it wouldn't be that big a deal. I just feel that it would
be better for a brother and sister to "play doctor" than doing it with
other kids where who knows what might happen as a result. In my case I
have two daughters which makes it a little different. It's not like they
can really have sex with each other, at least not "real" sex since
neither of them has a penis!
From the limited information I've gotten from the few families that I
know have active incestual relationships, if there's one thing that is
consistent is how the kids tend to be much better behaved with each other
when they are actively involved sexually. I suppose it only makes sense
that a boy would be nicer to a sister if he knows she'll blow him in
return.
As I mentioned, in my case I have two daughters who are almost three
years apart. How that will play out when they get older is anyone's
guess!
********
Q: Will you allow your kids to have sex with their friends in your
house?
A: Assuming they're all old enough to know what they're doing then
why not so long as it's THEIR idea and not due to any influence from me
or my husband. For obvious reasons I would NOT join in but I would feel
better if I was nearby to supervise and even provide some discipline or
advice if necessary. For me, I'd much rather know my daughter was
getting laid up in her bedroom where she can be safe and comfortable than
in the back seat of a car or who knows where else. While I wouldn't want
her boyfriend to feel TOO intimidated, I don't think it hurts for the boy
to know her parents are around to take of things if he doesn't behave
himself and act like a gentlemen.
If they wanted to masturbate with their friends around us I wouldn't say
anything but I honestly doubt anything like that would ever happen. I'd
just hope that my kids would know that it was OK if they DID, even if
they never did it.
********
Q: Will you masturbate or be nude around your daughter's friends?
A: I doubt that will ever happen just from a personal privacy and
potential liability concerns. Personal privacy in that I don't run
around nude now so what would be the point? Liability in that I doubt it
would take long for the rumors to start flying and who knows where that
might lead. Really, when you come down to it I just can't see any good
that can come out of doing that.
Chapter 4 - Underage Sex
========================
Q: How old should my daughter be before she has sex?
A: For whatever reason I get asked this one or at least similar to this
one a LOT! So much so in fact that I wrote an entire diary entry just on
this subject. Read "My Thoughts About Underage Sex" for the full
details.
Just as a summary, here are three essential principles that guide my
thoughts and actions regarding underage sex:
1. The needs of a child ALWAYS come first. When it comes to sex or
anything even remotely related to it, if there is ANY doubt then don't
do it. It's ALWAYS better to err on the side of caution. I abhor
child abuse, especially sexual molestation and exploitation. People
who abuse children deserve the maximum punishment allowable.
2. Sex between adults and underage kids is illegal in the USA and most
countries. Thus as a general rule I don't condone sex between adults
and minors, even when it's incestual, as it rarely can be kept a
secret. Even in those cases where the opportunity is there, careful
consideration is required beforehand as to the potential
psychological, physical, moral, ethical and legal ramifications.
3. Incestual sex, at least when practiced properly and NOT as a
rationalization for child abuse, is different from "regular" sex in
that family love and support mechanisms are present. As a result the
"rules" for underage sex in incestual situations can be less
restrictive than those for sex in general.
********
Q: Would you have sex with an underage boy or girl?
A: Incestual sex can follow a different set of rules thanks to the
support and love that's available in such families. When I started
having sex with my cousins, age really didn't factor into the equation.
The only thing that mattered was whether or not they were ready
emotionally and physically. I suppose technically that meant I had age
with underage people long before I was married but I really don't count
it in the same way I would if it was with someone outside my family.
So far as sex outside my family, there was a time not long ago when the
answer to this question would have been an unqualified NO. My mother was
quite strict about such things and instilled her beliefs in me. I knew
that my father had always been interested in young girls based on his
porn collection which was heavily biased towards tweens and preteens. My
mother knew better than to try and totally shut him down so as long as he
kept it to porn and fantasy, she was OK with it.
While dating I knew my fianc‚ shared the same desires and interests that
most men have when it comes to young girls but like most men, his desires
were restricted to fantasies and porn. I've always said that there are
no limits to fantasies - it's what someone DOES that counts so I had no
issue with any of this.
Once we were married my new husband wasted no time taking advantage of
his new "privileges" of being part of my family by having sex regularly
with my Aunt Linda. It didn't take long before he learned that she could
provide him with the same opportunities that she did for my dad so far as
underage girls were concerned. Well, who could blame him for doing
exactly the same thing most any normal man would under the same
circumstances?
I initially steered clear of my husband's new exploits as much as
possible but as with my dad, it was impossible to stay completely
isolated. As a result I've attended several of the family parties with
him and have engaged in sex with a number of young boys, some as young as
twelve and thirteen. I'd prefer them to be more in the fifteen to
sixteen range but they get to choose their partners and unless there's a
compelling reason they can?t be refused. I was able to rationalize it as
i not like these young girls and boys were lured into some sort of sex
ring or anything lurid like that. Their parents are always there to keep
an eye on things and everything is done consensually with the parents'
full permission and encouragement.
Thus to answer this question today I would say that while I don't go out
of my away to do it, I do occasionally have sex with underage partners
but it stays well within the guidelines I stated in the previous
question. Once the novelty wore off my husband stopped asking me to
attend as many parties which is rather ironic as now that I've gotten
over my initial inhibitions I've come to enjoy them and look forward to
them. Still, give me a forty year-old married father who's always been
faithful to his wife any day!
********
Q: When you chat and e-mail, you ask a lot of questions about underage
sex and even seem at times to push the person into doing something
involved with it, even if it's just fantasy. Why is that?
A: One of the reasons I publish my diary is to have fun by interacting
with different people. I find it interesting to see what people will say
and do when I "suggest" or prompt them. In many cases it's amazing how
their "experiences" seem to follow along with the questions and comments
I make. (Yes, that was meant to be satirical.) Please bear in mind that
I never initiate contact with anyone. The only people I discuss such
things are those who contact me first and express an interest. I just
follow the openings given to me. Am I playing head games? Well duh, of
course and I freely admit it. It's fun!
In the end, as far as I'm concerned it's all just talk. I've never going
to meet anyone I chat with so what's the big deal? Whatever THEY choose
to do is entirely up to them and I have no desire to get physically
involved or for that matter, ANY way involved if they're going to do
anything with an underage daughter or similar situation. They can TALK
about it but once they start DOING something then I'm through with them.
Chapter 5 - Home, School and Church
===================================
Q: What are the three top priorities in your life?
A: Easiest question of them all!
#1 - God
#2 - Family
#3 - Friends
For those who have accused me of being addicted to sex, notice it didn't
even make my Top Three list! My writings focus on the aspect of my life
that most people are interested in, NOT the most important one. Face it,
would you read my diary if it was all about Christianity?
********
Q: Do you have any children?
A: Yes, two beautiful daughters, Mia (4) and Kylie (1). We decided long
ago to limit it to two kids, regardless of their sex so while I was
hoping for a son I accept the gifts we've been given from God. Now that
our family is complete both Steve and I have been "fixed" which does make
life a whole lot easier!
********
Q: When were you saved?
A: I was ten years old at a summer church camp. The last night after the
evening service I went to my counselor and asked her to help to me to
pray to be saved. She kneeled beside me and I gave my life to Jesus and
have never looked back since. While I may submit myself in a physical
way to a man, he will NEVER have my soul as it's permanently in Christ's
hands.
********
Q: Do you have any hobbies?
A: I enjoy crafts and I have one unusual hobby, at least for a girl. My
dad has always been into model radio-controlled airplanes and he got me
interested when I was started high school. I really am not the best
pilot in the world (ask my dad how many planes he's had to climb a tree
just to salvage the parts!) As the only girl in the club I do get a lot
of attention and everyone is very helpful!
********
Q: What is your favorite place/activity to unwind and relax?
A: Nothing beats slipping nude into the blazing hot water in my dad's hot
tub late at night with the lights out, the stars shining, and a full moon
on the horizon. Mmmmmmm, the hot water, pulsing of the jets, and
beautiful view mesmerize me sometimes!
On a more practical note, for my everyday needs I LOVE to masturbate -
sometimes three or more times a day. Feels so good and what a stress
reliever!
********
Q: What is your favorite place to visit on vacation?
A: Unfortunately, with my parent's professional schedules we never seemed
to travel to many places. Now that I'm married I hope to rectify that.
For now, I would say Cedar Point in Ohio is probably my favorite place.
Kennywood in Pittsburgh is fun too, especially on community day when I
know many of the people there.
********
Q: What is your favorite type of restaurant and meal?
A: Chinese with a Mongolian Buffet. I love mixing up my own dish and
seeing it cooked in front of me spiced just the way I want it. Pizza and
wings is great for party food. Godiva ice cream is to die for when I
feel the urge to splurge!
********
Q: Why did you choose to go to college out of state?
A: Actually I was accepted at three schools in three different states.
One wanted everyone to get married - too overbearing even though they
offered maid service and a free laptop. Another was farther away than I
wanted to be plus they were a bit on the strict side - dancing was only
allowed there starting a few years earlier! The one I chose had an
excellent teaching curriculum and was only a few hours from Pittsburgh.
********
Q: How did you reconcile your Christian faith with your lifestyle?
A: I have a VERY strong Christian faith and I've always been active in my
church. I've taught Bible studies and help to lead a junior-high youth
group. I encourage abstinence and if that doesn't work, safe sex. Above
all I believe the Bible teaches personal responsibility which means sex
should never result in unwanted babies, broken marriages, etc.
OK, we could have a long debate on Leviticus but what would be the point?
Anyone quoting it to me had better be ready to explain to me why they
choose just the passages that apply to their argument and not the entire
book. Leviticus was a set of rules for the Jewish nation that had no
constitution or civil laws. They lived their lives governed by religious
law. We can debate how the New Testament and Old Testament relate but
frankly I leave that for my professors and pastor. If you don't agree
with me already then there's probably no point in even discussing it.
These are the principles that guide my behaviors. I'm not trying to
judge or condemn anyone for cheating on their wives - indeed some of my
favorite guys to chat with are doing exactly that! I recognize that many
marriages do not work and that spouses seek other outlets but that is
another discussion entirely. Some of my hottest fantasies and
experiences have involved married men. I love the feeling I get knowing
that I'm sexy and desirable enough that a married man wants me so bad
that he will forsake his vows to his wife and risk his career and
marriage just to have me for a few hours.
In the end sex should be a fulfilling experience; one which glorifies the
body and soul given to you by God. I love sex and I intend to experiment
and pursue as many opportunities as I can.
********
Q: Why did you become a teacher?
A: I've always done well in school so from the scholastic side of it I
enjoy being in a school environment and being in class. I love working
with kids and knowing I'm having a positive influence in their lives.
********
Q: You're about to be marooned on a deserted island and can choose just 5
things/people to have with you. Food and water are plentiful and there's
even a hut to live in. What/who would you want to have with you?
A: 1. My Bible
2. My husband
3. My daughters
4. My parents
5. A computer with a high-speed internet connection
********
Q: Did you change your lifestyle while teaching at a Christian school?
A: Not really. After all, wasn't like I would tell everyone there what I
did at home or anything like that. I dressed very conservatively, as
required, and would never have even considered doing anything risqu‚
while at work. I'm 31 now and I think in some ways I've matured and
grown more responsible and would have changed regardless of where I work.
********
Q: Do you feel you are a positive role model for your students?
A: Absolutely. I would never tell other people's kids about my sex life.
That would be inappropriate and disrespectful at best, illegal and
corrupting at worst. When I talk to young girls privately I always
encourage abstinence first but if they're already involved then I try to
make sure they're at least protecting themselves. I always strive to be
professional and respect the desires and principles of their parents.
********
Q: Would you ever do anything sexual with any kids in your class?
A: Let me make this perfectly clear... I would NEVER consider doing
ANYTHING unprofessional with ANY student. I do not tease or otherwise
"accidentally" let anything show. Such acts are quickly noticed and
reputations established that lead to dismissal and possible arrest. Of
course there are a lot of cute kids in my classes and I'm sure a number
of them will grow up soon into hot girls and hunks. To be completely
honest I've had my fair share of fantasies at home while alone in bed but
that's all they are - fantasies. That said, in real life NOTHING has or
will ever happen with a student of mine of ANY age ? period.
Personal Data
=============
age/birthday 31, born March 1, 1985
height 5'4"
weight 105
measurements 32B-20-32
hair color various shades of blonde now, been brunette as well
piercings none right now
tattoos nothing permanent
ethnic German/Italian
education BA/MA, Elementary Education
occupation School Teacher - 8th grade
religion Protestant, raised Presbyterian
home city Mount Lebanon, PA
marital status happily married on August 27, 2011
kids two daughters (Mia is 4, Kylie is 1)
living at apartment, south side of Pittsburgh
hobbies shopping, movies, camping, water skiing,
reading, sunbathing, being with friends
extracurricular church youth group helper (12-15 age group)
community volunteer
blood donor
favorite color sky blue
favorite author God (as in the author of the Bible)
Stephen King (yes, I have a morbid side)
favorite TV show Big Bang Theory
Walking Dead
most anything on HGTV
Master Chef
Modern Family
Game of Thrones
favorite movies Star Wars The Force Awakens
Hunger Games (all but the last one)
Princess Diaries
Titanic
Lord of the Rings (NOT The Hobbit though)
Shrek (the original)
Same Time Next Year (an oldie w/ Alan Alda)
favorite books The Bible
Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
Tale of Two Cities
Hunger Games Trilogy
50 Shades of Grey
Gone Girl
favorite poem Invictus, by William Earnest Henley
Road Not Taken, by Robert Frost
Paradox, by Clarence R. Wylie, Jr.
Oh the Places You'll Go!, by Dr. Seuss
favorite singers Adele
Josh Groban
Point of Grace
favorite actress Jennifer Lawrence
favorite actors Toby McGuire
Matthew McNaughney
Richard Gere (he's old but still hot!)
music tastes Christian Rock (Point of Grace)
places to visit Hong Kong (just sounds exotic)
Amsterdam (live sex shows!)
favorite outfit sneaker, short cutoffs and a tight cami, no underwear
traits I like honesty
open-minded
intellectual
articulate
sexy
self-confident but humble
traits I hate greed
lazy
boastful
conceited
disrespectful
1st time sex 14 (he was 16)
1st time w/ Dad 16
do I masturbate? yes, 1 or 2 times a day on average
fav positions #1 missionary
#2 cowgirl
#3 doggie
off-limits anal sex - my ass is labeled "exit only"
bestiality (gross)
anything painful or humiliating
child abuse
swallow? YES
shaved? usually in summer
birth control tubes cut
# of guys fucked >200 one-to-one
>300 including parties and groups
# of blowjobs sorry, lost count a long time ago!
# of girls >30
oldest male 56 (I was 22)
oldest female 49 (my mom)
43 (Tammy, mom's best friend, I was 24)
people I admire my parents
Hillary Clinton, future President of the United States
Condoleezza Rice, ex-Secretary of State
Ivanka Trump
THE END