The events described took place during my final year of school, when I was in the sixth form and was Captain of my House. I was 15 years old at this time.
It was winter - the middle of winter - and it was bitterly, bitterly cold at least in Australian terms. The school lies on a bay, the land about is rather flat, and when the winter wind blows, it can be quite unpleasant. Even without the wind, the temperature was only a few degrees above freezing, and with the wind and the rain, conditions were not exactly pleasant.
It was a Saturday. On Saturday mornings, we had to do interschool sport, and despite the weather, I was in pretty high spirits that day. I was smaller than most of my classmates, being younger, and while I was all right at sports was nothing spectacular. On this particular day, I had just achieved the pinnacle of my sporting career though. Despite my lack of size, I chose to play Rugby as my father had been one of the schools better players, and tradition meant a lot to me. And as I came out of the showers around midday, the Captain of the First XV was waiting for me.
"Congratulations, Rysher."
"What for, Wren?"
"I’m giving you your Blue."
With those words Wren informed me that I had reached the second of my two major goals in my school career. I wanted to be a Prefect (which I had achieved at the start of the year) and I wanted School Colours in sport. Those three words meant I could have a small gold XV embroidered on my blazer pocket. A tiny symbol of achievement in the school. I was in the First XV officially.
Despite the bitter cold of the day, despite the fact that I was bruised and battered from our match that day, I have rarely been as happy in my life as I was when ten minutes later I entered the House. I was in a good mood - a very good mood, and that meant that I was willing to be generous and magnanimous to others.
As I came through the door, I encountered a group of junior boys all rugged up in the entrance, getting ready to run across to the refectory for a hot lunch. It was cold enough that even the prospect of hot food was still leaving them somewhat reluctant to leave the House.
"It's not going to get any warmer, boys. I'd make a run for it if I were you."
My good mood must have been noticeable, because one of the boys decided to try and take advantage of it.
"Rysher, could we light the fire in the common room, this afternoon? Please."
A chorus of 'Please' went up from the other boys.
The House had two common rooms - senior - used by Form V and VI (Form IV could use it as well, but were rarely at the main school) - and junior used by Forms I to III. Each had a large fireplace. The fireplace in the senior common room was routinely lit in winter. The one in the junior common room was lit more rarely. It could only be lit with the permission of the House Master or the House Captain, and permission was rarely given. This dated back to events decades earlier when one of the school's boarding houses had caught ablaze in the middle of the night after a fire was left untended. A fire in the boarding house was one of the school's worst nightmares and it meant that if I gave permission for the junior boys to light their fire, I had to take on the responsibility of checking they had put it out that night - not a major task, by any means, but they were asking me to do a little more work. But I was in a good mood.
"All right - you can light it - but make sure it's out and cleared by 9.30 tonight and make sure that someone from the junior common room reminds me to check it in case I forget."
They thanked me and ran across to the dining hall. I went to my room, changed, and joined everyone in the refectory.
The rest of the day passed without major incident. I actually spent most of it sitting next to the fire in the senior common room, reading Tolkien's Lord of the Rings. I only left my fireside seat to eat, drink, and use the facilities. Perhaps half an hour was taken up with a debate between myself and two fellow prefects on one side and several other sixth formers on the other, about whether prefects privileges included being able to monopolise the fire - just a good natured dispute, quite fun actually.
Around 9.30, there was a knock on our door.
"Excuse me, Rysher. You said to remind you to check our fire."
"Thanks. I'm coming."
I headed down to the junior common room and was rather amused to find that they had done an extremely good job of extinguishing their fire. Half burned wood was piled in a neat pile on one side of the fireplace, and most of the ash had been removed from the bottom of the fireplace as well. It was not just extinguished, but actually quite clean.
I returned to the senior common room where I read until 10 or so, before deciding to retire. It was a cold night and most of the senior boys took to their beds fairly early. I was one of the last to go to sleep - after carefully damping down our fire.
I went to bed, and I went to sleep.
And around two in the morning was awoken by a noise.
I lay there for a few seconds trying to work out why I'd been woken. What had woken me? And then I heard it again.
"FIRE!"
A loud shout from somewhere in the house - a high pitched voice, that of a young boy. My feet seemed to be on the floor before the echo had died away. I snapped on my light and grabbed from its position hanging behind my door, my fire kit. I was wearing striped flannel pyjamas. It was cold - and I could smell smoke. I opened my door and stepped into the corridor just as the fire alarm started ringing.
Along the corridor, other doors were being flung open as other sixth form boys - the sixth form rooms were nearest mine - emerged. We were all in just our pyjamas.
My heart was pounding - I'm sure all of ours were, but I think for me it was even more intense. It may not be clearly understood but even though I was only fifteen, I was in charge here. I was Captain of my House - and I was in charge, at least for the moment. There were adults about - the House Master (Mr Pinner) and his wife, and the Matron - but adults actually took something of a hands off approach in running the House. The House Master would certainly take over in any emergency without hesitation, but he left a lot of the day to day running of the house to me. Matron was in her infirmary, nearby. The House Master was in his flat attached to the rest of the House but still slightly separate. I was there in the middle and I had to take charge. I knew my fellows - I knew what to do. Our fear of fire in the House meant we had plans for this worked out and we drilled at least once a term.
"Rodney - run and make sure Pinner knows. Patterson, get to old school and tell the Head. Tynes, find Matron."
While I was giving these orders, the two Prefects who were also in our house were also giving orders - detailing other sixth form boys to make sure that the First, Second, Third, and Fifth Form were evacuated. And then these two boys formed up with me and we began to systematically go through every room of the House in a predetermined order.
This was the other side of our authority. When a House had burned back in the 1920s, the last two people out were the Captain of the House and the Captain of the School. Both were badly affected by smoke on that occasion. As a Captain, and for my companions as Prefects, we understood that the power and the privileges we received came with responsibilities - and among those responsibilities was an understanding that we would not leave the House until we'd checked every room.
There was quite thick smoke in the air but there didn't seem to be any immediate danger. I actually darted back into my room and grabbed my slippers and dressing gown before we began our sweep of the House. We'd only gone a few rooms before the Matron appeared and tried to tell us to leave. I refused - one of the few times I knew I could get away with disobeying Matron's instructions - and we continued to do what we had been taught to do. Mr Pinner was there almost immediately after, but he didn't try to tell us to leave. Instead he joined us on the sweep.
I was initially convinced that I must have done something wrong with the fire in the senior common room, and I was quite relieved when we opened up the door to that room and found no signs of any problems. On the ground floor we were joined by the School Captain who was also carrying his fire kit, but we found no signs of fire anywhere in the House - except for the thick smoke.
We left the House - Mr Pinner had one hand on my collar and one on the School Captain's and virtually pushed us out the door when we tried to insist that the traditions of the school said we should be the last to leave, not him, and then other staff members - most of the Masters lived with their families in houses on the school grounds so adults were appearing from everywhere - began herding all of us into the main school. Once we were out of the House, my status suddenly meant nothing. I was now just another boy who was going to catch his death of cold if they didn't get him inside. Fire trucks were arriving - all this had taken less than five minutes I expect, and all the lights in all the other boarding houses were on as boys leaned out the windows to watch. We were given milo in the refectory as the staff tried to find out whether we could return to the House or whether we'd need to be billeted among the other Houses.
After half an hour or so, we were told we could move back into the House. The fire had been contained - it was actually very small and was located in one of the utility rooms that opened onto the outside of the House - which was why we hadn't found it in our sweep. It had produced a lot of smoke, but no real damage to anything.
The following day was Sunday and we were allowed a sleep in due to our disrupted night. Chapel was moved back by an hour - Chapel was actually voluntary for senior boys by this stage, a recent innovation, and I rarely attended except when I had to carry out duties - as a Captain I had to sometimes read a lesson.
As I sat down to breakfast, Mr Pinner took up a seat next to me.
"Matron is not very happy with you, young man."
"No, Sir."
"She wanted me to have a word with you about your place in the House."
"Yes, Sir."
"So I am. You're Captain, and as far as I'm concerned what you did last night was entirely appropriate. But do bear in mind that Matron does act for the best, Nathan. She does actually care about all of you boys and from what she says you were rather brusque with her."
"I know, Sir. I'm sorry, Sir. I will see her, Sir."
"They've determined the cause of the fire, Nathan, as well. The vacuum tank caught fire somehow. It's out of commission for now - so pass the word that boys aren't to vacuum their rooms until further notice. I'm sure they'll be delighted to have some of their cleaning duties suspended. It's a relief, I must say - last night they were talking about the possibility of it being deliberate. I must say if any boy had been responsible he'd be on his way home by now - or in the hands of the police."
The House had a vacuum system actually built throughout the House. When we needed to clean a room, we hooked up a vacuum hose - similar to that on any smaller vacuum cleaner - to various ports around the house and it was all vacuumed into a large tank in one of the utility rooms. I actually always thought the system was rather neat to be honest. All this network of pipes passing through the walls. When I was a first form boy, I actually used to make up little stories in my head about being small enough to travel through the system (all right, I was ten, and I'd lived on a farm without anything modern on it until just before arriving at the school - the vacuum system was neat!)
"I'll tell them, Sir."
I went for a walk during Chapel. The weather was bit better this day, and I quite enjoyed it. When I returned to the House, the junior boys were just returning from Chapel, and I decided to take the opportunity to tell them about the vacuum. Boys had to wear good uniform to chapel and changed out of it as soon as they could afterwards - so I knew I had a few minutes when all the junior boys would be in their dorms changing.
"All right, boys, listen to me. The vacuum system can't be used until further notice. It's where the fire was last night - something must have shorted out I suppose. So you don't get to vacuum your rooms this week."
I gave the same basic short announcement in each of the junior rooms and then went to my own room to do some work. I had only been working about a minute when there was a quiet knock at my door.
"Yes, Falcon."
Stephen Falcon was a tiny little first form boy. No younger than the others chronologically, he seemed much younger than most. He was a very quiet boy, almost timid, and never any trouble. And he looked absolutely terrified as he stood there.
"Rysher... Nathan... I think I'm in the most awful trouble." He was almost crying.
"Come in, Steve, and close the door."
I sat down on my bed, and had him sit next to me.
"What's the problem?"
"I think I might have started the fire last night."
"No, Stephen, it started in the vacuum tank."
"I know." He was silent for a moment, then he stiffened and spoke in a resolute voice. "That's why I think I caused it. I put out the fire last night and I vacuumed down the ashes. They might have still been hot."
I dropped my head into my hands. This was not good. I knew what I had to do. I had to tell Mr Pinner. And I knew that if I did... well, I couldn't be sure what would happen to be honest.
"Falcon... have you been caned before?"
He made a strangled little noise, coughed, and then said in a tiny voice. "No, Rysher."
The kid was tiny. 12 years old, but he looked more like 9 to me. He was a cute little kid, who'd never given me an ounce of trouble. I liked him quite a lot.
"Wait outside for a moment."
He walked out my door and I removed my cane from its hiding place, positioned a chair, and then I called him back in. He saw the cane and his eyes locked on it - not at all uncommon, and I could see the absolute terror in his face.
"Close the door."
As he did so, I braced myself to do one of the hardest things I've ever done.
"Bend over and put your hands on the seat of the chair."
I watched as he did so. And then I committed myself.
"I am going to give you six."
He flinched as I announced the number. So did I.
"Stay down - don't you dare stand up." Because if you do, I'll have to stop, and if I stop, I'm not sure I'll be able to start again.
I took aim - I laid the cane right across the centerline of his tiny bottom raised it and slashed it down. He jerked and he shrieked.
I lined the cane up again and slashed it down again and again and again - he'd had four strokes in less than ten seconds. He was wailing, and tears were streaming down his cheeks – and there were some on mine as well.
I waited about five seconds before delivering number five, and followed it with the sixth stroke as quickly as I could afterwards. As the sixth stroke fell, he straightened up, and I could see a look of pure pain and outrage on his face.
"Get out."
"I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!"
He ran from my room. I slammed the door behind him, then hurled my cane at the wall. Then I picked it up, snapped it over my knee and threw it across my desk. I sat down on my bed, and composed myself as best I could - taking about twenty minutes before rising and walking down the corridor to Mr Pinner's domain. I knocked on his door.
He opened it and seeing the look on my face ushered me inside.
"What is wrong, Nathan?"
"Stephen Falcon was responsible for the fire, Sir. He vacuumed ashes into the system from the fire in the junior common room. But you don't need to deal with it, Sir. I already have. He won't ever do that again, I p-p-p-promise y-y-y-ou." I was shaking as I spoke, and realised I should have taken more time to compose myself. I drew a deep breath. "I'm sorry, Sir. I've dealt with it, Sir. He's been severely punished, so you don't have to, Sir."
"You should have left it to me."
"No, Sir. Because you might have had to take it too far."
"Perhaps... still, whether you should have left it or not, you didn't, and I can hardly punish him twice - and I'm sure you acted for the best."
"Thank you, Sir."
I need to hear that. Was it true? I don't know - but it was what I needed to hear.