The New Trainee by Karen Blayne

Oh by the way red tape first.

Be warned these short stories contain mature content or naughty bits and as such may corrupt you if you’re under 12, 16, 18, 21 or 25 depending where you live thus they are not suitable for you so put them back on the shelf and let them age for a year or two.

They were sort of scribbled for fun. They were first posted on asstr.org. If you’ve paid money for this book just be aware the author has not received any payment. In fact no one has permission to charge money for this book and copyright is retained by the author. All copies must be of the complete document. ©2014 Asstr.org accepts donations if you’re feeling rich or even if you’re not.

Luv Karen

I blame it all on the second bottle of sherry, I mean we were having just a normal bitch until then. You know like yes we all have degrees now and huge student loans now what about a job and I don’t mean managing a hamburger joint either.

Ana blurted out her fantasy right now would be no student loan and to be a personal assistant. “Hey guys just to change the topic want to hear what the guys were fantasying about last night at the bar?” “How low was your neck line Mel?” “Wonderbra time was it?” “Well if you’ve got them flaunt them.” “Is it true you tucked a fifty dollar tip in under your bust last week?” “I absolutely deny it. It was two, one under each and I leant forward to give the guy a kiss on the cheek afterwards. I think it was only going to be one but then he handed the second one over for the other boob as he put it.” “So who was fantasying and whom were they fantasying over?” “Gina’s Phillip was holding forth about having his own office junior paid at twice the normal rate with a suitable dress code to assist him in matters personal.” “He’s not my Phillip.” “You’d like him to be though?” “I danced a slow dance with him once, by the second dance I thought he had a cucumber stuffed down his slacks. God it was awesome.”

“Didn’t you watch a movie at his place once Tori?” “Oh you mean the weekend that Kevin was away and I was feeling neglected?” Tori had a faraway look on her face. “Earth to Tori, earth to Tori come in please.” “Well I just happened to be just taking a peek in his back pack when I saw he had a DVD I hadn’t seen so I asked if I could watch it sometime. He replied I was welcome to view it with him that evening. So I went back with him.” There was a silence “and...” “Oh sorry well his DVD player was in the bedroom and we sort of stretched out on his double bed and the movie wasn’t that good so we were sort of making out.” “Sort of?” “Well I was getting hot and bothered anyway and I sort of said we couldn’t go all the way because Kevin wouldn’t like it.” “And then?” “He lay between my thighs and lapped me in a way that Kevin never had. I still get warm just thinking about it. Anyway Kevin didn’t last long after that experience.” I don’t know about the rest but my heel was resting discreetly up against my crotch as I rocked back and forth.

The next day I was feeling delicate so stopped off on the way to the job center for a latte about eleven or so. I’d picked up the paper and was working my way down the job vacancies when this elderly guy sat on the next table asked if I wanted a temporary job as an assistant for a couple of days. Well money’s money after all so I agreed and he took me to a sort of workshop round the corner. “I want to take a month off but I have a couple of orders that need to be made up so I wondered if you could do them for me?” “Anything complicated?” “Fairly but Algernon will show you what to do.” He pulled a tarpaulin off an industrial robot. “I’ll just sort lunch out whilst Algernon sorts you out.”

It was weird, Algernon had been programmed to work with people and to be people aware. He displayed what he wanted me to lift off the rack and where to put it then he nudged it so it was exactly right then welded it together. Can you imagine a robot for a boss? Apparently robots aren’t very quick at selecting the right part humans are faster so we worked as a team some bits he did some bits I did. “Getting on alright are you?” “Well yes I guess so.” “Good, good, well you can keep the money for the job I’ve got enough these days less $20 an hour rent for the workshop and Algernon. It was fun programming him but now it’s done it’s not so interesting. Algernon takes the orders from a web site together with the CAD file, orders any standard box channel or tube it needs and we haven’t got in stock and only starts the job when we have enough. All you have to do is lift it onto the cutting table and then bring it the bits to weld when it’s ready. I can take a flight this afternoon south. You should finish by tomorrow afternoon and you might be lucky another order might roll in. Oh Algernon works out the optimum pricing by the way.” Algernon and I worked through the rest of the day and by six pm we’d just about finished building whatever it was we’d built. Algernon sent off the email saying come and get it.

Next morning I rolled up about eight am, well I couldn’t sleep and there was a van sitting at the loading dock ready to pick up our bit of modern art. Algernon printed off the invoice to go with it. $3,782 plus material costs. God it had taken us six hours, so like $600 an hour less $20 an hour to rent the workshop and Algernon. The other job was estimated at ten hours so I took it steady and worked our way through slowly taking just under twelve to do the work. Well it was hard work lifting things from the rack. Maybe two of us could keep up with Algernon better?

The phone rang “Hanstead Engineering.” I answered. “Could you make another dozen by the end of the week? Our QA people were very impressed with the quality of the welds.” “If you drop the order into the web site I’ll see what we can do.” Seventy two hours more work by the end of the week, not with just little me. I emailed the gang. For $75 an hour they’d be happy to work any hours of the day I suggested. I took them all on working in five teams so that we could keep Algernon working twenty four hours a day seven days a week provided the work came in. Other work trickled in and remembering what I’d been taught I got Algernon to set up four queues. If someone wanted a slew of work it went in a single queue, if someone else had an order that went in a second queue. That way we wouldn’t end up dependent on one customer and being squeezed on price. The fourth queue was for rush jobs at a premium price, double price got you next day delivery. The girls were happy with their pay, I was happy with all the money rolling in and Algernon well he seemed happy as well.

At the beginning of the fourth week he rang, he was very happy relaxing on the beach could we carry on without him, he’d call back in a month or two. I had enough cash to buy a second Algernon did he mind if I copied his software over to the new one? Not a problem.

We had money coming in like we’d won the lottery, what to do with it. An office junior might be useful. I rang Phillip, did he fancy a job at $25 an hour? Would he like to drop by for an interview?

“So what’s the job then?” “Oh trainee office junior at $25 an hour.” “Do you want to take up my references?” Jade stepped into the room “No I think you’re big enough.” Phillip looked a bit taken back, Tori slipped in besides Jade, “I told the girls all about your tongue action.” “Have you told him about the dress code, dress slacks, shirt and tie every day and about the double pay provided he keeps us all happy and there are ten of us to assist in matters personal.” The last was from Mel looking innocent, well as innocent as Mel could look when fluttering her eyelashes.

After his initial shock I must confess our new trainee is shaping up nicely.