The Stalker by Karen Blayne

Oh by the way red tape first.

Be warned these short stories contain mature content or naughty bits and as such may corrupt you if you’re under 12, 16, 18, 21 or 25 depending where you live thus they are not suitable for you so put them back on the shelf and let them age for a year or two.

They were sort of scribbled for fun. They were first posted on asstr.org. If you’ve paid money for this book just be aware the author has not received any payment. In fact no one has permission to charge money for this book and copyright is retained by the author.

 

Well I’d finally landed the post grad research post, the pay was as expected a pittance but with a bit of careful planning I was hoping to keep expenses down to a minimum and hopefully the resulting paper would lead to fame and fortune, well another research project at least.  Careful research and planning was my forte and the first step had been to dig around my network to find someone who knew the city.  Julia had come up trumps with a name of a guy who lived a few doors away from her.  It’s amazing what you can come up with on the Internet these days plus a bit of homework from Julia and her friends.  I mean do you know just how much useful stuff is in Facebook and Myspace?  And just how many people use a secure password on Amazon?  I’d gone through everything he’d brought for the last five years.  For a start if he hadn’t thrown them all away there were books there that were on my wish list.

My app found the right Bridgehead cafe, and I checked to see my target leaving the office, and entered before him.  He apparently liked to stop off in the evening on his way home for a snack and a coffee.  There is a knack to being picked up by the right guy when he doesn’t even know he’s about to pick you up, you let him initiate the conversation then leave him a question to answer, then you gently try to discourage him.  So I stood at the cream jug looking into the distance as he came to get his dose of saturated fat.  “Excuse me?”  “Oh I’m sorry, I was miles away I’m new in town and was wondering which bus I should catch to Edgware Drive?”  Some else came up behind him and he guided me to a table away from the cream table.  “There are a couple of different routes it depends on which part of Edgware Drive you want?”  “310?”  We talked about my new post and the difficulty of finding your way around.  He even gave me the number of the bus I needed to take.  Our coffee finished I got up to leave, “I’ll come with you.”  “No, no there’s no need I’m a big girl now who can read bus numbers all by herself.”  I picked up my back pack and walked to the door.  Outside I hesitated for an instant when he caught up with me and announced he was catching the same bus.  “Oh good then perhaps you can help me get off at the right stop.”

We reached the stop and it was just as Julia had mentioned, the same one as he got off at normally before walking past 310.  I looked at him oddly as we descended, “It happens to be my normal stop?”  he answered defensively.  He watched me ring the bell at 310 and receive no answer.  I asked “Where’s the nearest cafe I can get a coffee whilst I wait?”  He looked at me, I thought for a moment he wasn’t going to offer then spoke.  “I live a couple of houses up and I can probably find you one.”  Should I hesitate, accept, decline in a way that he’d try to convince me.  I wasn’t sure if he’d try or not so after a moment’s hesitation “Thank you kind sir.” I dipped him a small curtsey.

Finally through the door at last, well I’d won my bet with Julia at least, one double latte.  Julia had sworn she’d never seen a single female walk through the door besides the cleaner and she had the same one who thought he was perfect for Julia and insisted on giving her all the gossip about him.  As Julia said some guys you don’t date, ones you work with and your neighbours, it’s just too risky if things go wrong.  Inside was a typical guy place, big screen and stack of boxes besides in a rack with lots of glowing LEDs and such.  Needless to say there was only one chair set up for the screen although there was a sofa with a coffee table in front along the wall.

I followed him into the kitchen as he wondered round making coffee.  I looked at the microwave, “If you’re feeling hungry I’ve microwavable food in my bag?”  “No that’s fine I’ve got the take out menus around somewhere.”  “But what about your vitamin C?”  He looked at me blankly.  “Whilst I’m waiting let me play with the microwave it will give me something to do whilst I wait and if you don’t like it I’ll pay for the take out.” 

Time to try out my Great Aunts theory about men, feed the brutes, well she’d had four husbands after all so must know something.  I lifted out the plastic boxes with slices of pie, his mother’s Facebook recipe but with my pastry and more onion.  The spuds came next red skinned ones, just pricked and nuked.  I found a pan and poured in some petite pois and used the stove to bring them to the boil.  Slice the spuds open and apply a dab of butter from my back pack et voila!  Serve on two bone china plates I also just happened to have in my back pack together with stainless steel cutlery.  I set everything out on the kitchen table and poked my head round the door.  “Food?”  He came strolling in and did a double take.  “Generally I just use plastic cutlery and throw the containers away after use.”  “Well try being environmentally friendly tonight.”  “It looks attractive anyway.”  I smiled at him, and waited anxiously whilst he sampled it.  “This is good.”  He pronounced.  Thank god I didn’t have to buy in the takeout.  We ate together and I asked about his day trying to keep the conversation going without trying to seem like I was prying.  There was no need after all I already had the low down on him.

My phone beeped and I picked it up.  Surprise surprise a text message saying my landlady’s flight had been cancelled but she should be back tomorrow.  I showed him the message and asked if he knew of any cheap hotels.  He offered me the floor for the night since I had a sleeping bag strapped to the bottom of my back pack.

There was a stack of sealed DVDs to one side of the TV.  He motioned them to me and asked if there was anything that took my fancy.  I looked for the latest Opera that Amazon had shipped him that week since I knew he was into opera and handed it to him.  He slipped it in then came and lounged back in his black leather Eames lounge chair.  If I sat in his lap I’d be too forward, if I sat on the sofa I won’t be able to see the opera, I compromised and sat on the floor at his feet.  He paused the DVD after selecting the language for the subtitles and looked down at me.  “I wasn’t thinking was I?”  He got up and moved the leather swivel chair out of the way.  “Give me a hand?”  He had one end of the sofa so I took the other and together, I liked the together bit, we moved it round to face the screen before settling down on it.

Thank god the opera had been reviewed on Amazon.  I mean it was enjoyable but by remembering a bit of one of the reviews I could at least remember enough to ask a couple of leading questions which got him talking and relaxing.  When bedtime came we just sort of drifted into his bedroom and got into bed still talking about opera singers and he was describing one of the live operas he’d saved up to see when he’d been a student.

When I awoke the next morning I became aware of sharing the bed. There was a delightful male warmth and smell present, I cast my mind back to my undergrad days waking males usually meant an erection and it would be a shame to waste one wouldn’t it?  So I slipped over him and guided him in whilst he was half asleep, wishing him good morning with a kiss.

When next I looked at the clock it was nearly 11 am so I sneaked out of bed and picking up a silk dressing gown from the back of the door that smelt of him I wandered into the kitchen and started inspecting the contents of the cupboards.  Soon I had batch of scones cooling on a wire rack and the kettle had just boiled ready for coffee.

The door bell rang and I heard Mark stagger out of bed to answer it.  “Hi there big brother, what are you doing still in bed at this time of the morning?”  His sister glanced towards the kitchen and catching sight of me turned bright red.  “Oh my God, Mum and Dad are parking the car downstairs.  So how long has this been going on Oh high moral brother of mine who never even looks at girls and has never been known to take one out before?  Can I be bridesmaid?”  I dashed to the bedroom and quickly pulled on a pair of knickers and my silk travelling sun dress.  Bare footed and bra less I slipped back into the kitchen.  “You met her yesterday?  You spoke to her first?”  “My God you picked her up and brought her home!”   Mark sneaked back into the bedroom to get dressed and little sister came into the kitchen to interrogate me.

“So did you do it?”  “Made coffee?”  I asked innocently.  “No made him, I have to know!  I was beginning to think he was gay, I know mother is certain.  I think the only way you could have managed it would be to sleep with him and grab his early morning erection whilst he was half asleep.”  She went bright red again.  “Oh my God, you raped him.”  “That was at 7 o’clock, it’s now after 11 I hardly think I’m capable of raping him for four hours.” I said as primly as I was able.  The front door opened once more and his parents came in.  Leaving Mark’s sister sitting on a stool in the kitchen in what seemed to be a case of severe shock I carried coffee and fresh scones into the living room.

“Hi I’m Julie, here’s some fresh coffee and scones to refresh you after your journey.”  I had his parents eating out of the palm of my hand in no time.  Well as background I’d dug up the dirt on them as well, so a few gardening questions to his mother, a few boating ones to his dad and it was as if we’d known each other for years.

You could sense trouble when Mark’s sister came out of the kitchen and sat quietly down.  “Are you feeling alright dear?” asked his mother solicitously, “You’re being very quiet at the moment which is quite unlike you.”  The fourteen year old picked up a magazine lying on the coffee table and proceeded to look through the pages without really looking.  I panicked as I looked towards her afraid that her parents might think it odd she was looking through Playboy.  I grabbed a plate of fresh scones and a coffee so she’d have to hold things in both hands and thrust them at her.  I’d scooped the magazine away from her and under the sofa just as she registered what she’d been looking at and turned bright red yet again.  I felt sorry for her so to get her talking normally I asked what she’d thought of the bride’s dress at the society wedding of the year that had been splashed all over the TV the previous week.

I couldn’t have picked a better subject to get her talking but as Mark came back into the room I could see him freeze when he heard the subject of the conversation.  He disappeared back into the bedroom.  Things were not looking good to say the least.  I couldn’t think fast enough to change the subject to something else that she’d have an opinion on, perhaps prom dresses?  Besides with his mother was picking up on the conversation, I resigned myself to a total disaster.  My chance for free board and lodging next year seemed to be receding by the second.

Oh well there was still a scone or two left in the kitchen and I could grab a cup of coffee before I slipped away.  I nibbled a scone and heard his voice.  “So do you think you could choose a bridesmaid’s dress by the end of the month?”  “Wow you getting married then?”  Oh God find me a stone I could crawl beneath, I hadn’t picked up on that in my researches at all.  “Well I’ve been thinking of it for a while but it seemed too much hassle to go through checking someone out to see if we were compatible and she liked the same sort of books as I did etc but it looks like I’ve found the perfect person now.”

I peered round the kitchen door to see him holding my little blue book, the one in which I’d made all my notes about him.  He smiled at me with a sort of predatory grin “It sort of fell out when I moved your bag and I just happened to look in it when I picked it up.  It seems a waste not to make use of all your hard work.”