Void

Tanya gazed out the porthole into the inky blackness of space. Her brown eyes did not see that illimitable array of twinkling, silvery dots before her. Her eyes did not see the reflection of her own face in the glass—a half-face of almost eerie stillness. The other half of that empty expression was hidden in the shadow cast by the meagre illumination found in the capsule. She drifted gently in the minimal gravity, anchored in place by the tether at her ankle. Her long red hair floated languidly, as though she were floating in water, and not air.

Her slim, pale body was bare, and had been from the time she entered the escape pod.

And all the while she floated there, she remembered him. Remembered his touch.

It has been a special day. Only a few days ago now, but it seemed a lifetime. That day had been their first anniversary together. And they were destined to spend it alone, in bliss. A faint smile crept across Tanya’s features as she remembered. She clung to those feelings now. They were all she had. Those feelings, and the memories.

The two of them had been surveying the god-forsaken rock they now orbited for the equivalent of six Earth months. It was hard, boring work, mapping and testing the surface of the planetoid to determine the potential of its raw materials. Long hours of tedious work, all alone. But that was why they had taken the contract—to be alone, to be together. They would always be together. They had promised each other.

On the day of their first anniversary Tanya has waited for him to return from the surface, flush with anticipation. The shuttle had docked and she had waited outside, dressed in a white crop top and g-string. This was dressing up for them. Usually, in their isolation, they drifted to the ship naked, or next to naked. But today was special and Tanya knew how much he liked her to wear something; he liked to “unwrap” his presents. And Tanya liked to be unwrapped by him.

She had shivered as she had hung there, grasping a handhold and grinning what she knew was a stupid, broad grin.

The airlock door had opened and there he was—wearing an almost identical grin. The sight of it had made her heart swell. They had just looked at each other for a time, communing silently with their eyes. They had long ago found words to be to a clumsy method of communicating.

Then he was upon her, and they had kissed and held each other tight. His hands had roamed over the expanse of her—stroking and teasing her in a fashion she had allowed no other man to do. For he had been her first. And her only.

He would have taken her then and there if she hadn’t pushed him away. She had to fight him with all her strength, he was so eager. But she regained control and, forcing back her laughter, had led him to the dining quarters. Tanya had wanted to toy with him for a while, before she signalled her eventual delicious surrender.

They had eaten, with a curious exchange of small talk taking place—idle, facile conversation about the day’s work and the progress of the contract. The ordinariness of the dialogue stood in contrast to the silly grins that kept breaking upon their faces, as though they both shared a guilty secret.

It had been during her attempt to serve dessert that his self-control had failed. Tanya guessed that he had a different idea of what dessert was from her. To be honest, she had preferred his idea of what should come after dinner. Her arm had brushed against him as she had passed the small, plastic food-box, and his hand had grasped her wrist tightly. It was a reflexive movement, and they had both stared down at the point of contact for a moment, as though trying to catch up with what had just occurred.

Then he had lunged at her. Boxes of dessert had gone cartwheeling through the cabin, forgotten as she abandoned all hope of a civilised end to the meal and met his hungry lips. His hands were under her clothing now, both of them massaging her breasts. She’d found his cock, her hands slipping into his underwear, wrapping around his already engorged member and drawing it out. For a moment she wanted him in her so badly she had just about abandoned her plan for the evening. Tanya had stroked him while he teased her breasts and body with his hands, their mouths locked together in an intense, never-ending kiss. But she wanted this to be special for him. So special.

Tanya remembered the fun of manoeuvring their entwined bodies out of the dining area and down to the sleeping quarters. She remembered the giggling, the laughter and false protestations of her desire to be free of him and his ravaging touch. He had responded by making animal noises and mauling her harder, slowing their progress along the short passageway. She loved it when he made those noises.

They had arrived, both with a couple of extra bruises from bumping into objects on their way; her top and his underwear had disappeared somewhere in the struggling transit. The lovers had paused, staring into each other’s eyes for a moment more. Tanya kissed him, and moved to produce a small pill, grey and unremarkable in nature; she had secretly concocted it for this occasion. She’d broken the tablet in two and offered him a portion as he watched. They’d swallowed their portions simultaneously and soon felt the delicious sensation of the psychotropic chemicals spreading through their limbs—enhancing sensation and distorting perception.

Tanya had knelt before her beloved and pulled him close. She ran her tongue along the underside of his cock and listened to his delicious moan of pleasure, before taking him into her mouth and working upon him. They floated there gently as she serviced him hungrily; one of his hands tangled in her hair as he kept them in the centre of the room. It was not long before his groans became increasingly heated, and then he had pulled her away, unwilling to expend himself in her mouth.

Tanya had not been able to decide at the time if she was disappointed or grateful at not receiving him like that—now she was bitterly disappointed. But it was his turn, and Tanya manoeuvred them over to their bed, where she had arranged things just as she wanted.

To prevent themselves floating away from their workstations it was standard practise to use Velcro tethers around an ankle to anchor a person in place as they worked. Tanya had positioned four of these tethers at their bed. They had made love many times with one tether, but never four. As she lay back on the bed and spread her limbs out towards the four floating restraints, he had looked upon her a short time—drinking in the image of her. Then, silently, he had moved to secure her in place, first one wrist, then other. And now she felt the synthetic material stretched around an ankle. A rush of adrenalin coursed through her body as her last ankle was secured in place—as she knew that there was no turning back now. She was his.

Tanya arched her back as she tested her bonds, thrusting her hips upwards and leaving no doubt as to her needs. She felt his hand close around her g-string and tense as the flimsy material was stripped away—exposing her to him. His hands closed under her thighs as his muscled arms lifted her hips still further up and she gasped as his lips moved over her, exploring her inner thighs, then her stomach before moving toward her centre. The drug in her system intensified the sensations, and Tanya’s chest tightened as he began to skilfully work upon her.

She couldn’t tell how long it was before her release had exploded through her, lost as she was in a haze of pure sensation. She knew she was screamed through it, but her voice sounded muffled and so far away. Now, before she had even chance to catch her breath, Tanya felt his body pressed upon the length of her hot, sweaty skin. A cry escaped her as she felt his member press upon her opening, and it was with an almost brutal lack of subtlety that she was entered. The sensation of being filled by him and being stretched to her limit so abruptly was almost overwhelming. She strained against her bonds as her hips worked to accommodate him and his girth. After the barest pause he began to move within her, fucking her body with a steadily building intensity and tempo. It was like nothing she had ever experience—laying there restrained, her senses on fire, being used by the one she would give everything for. Tanya had wanted this moment to last forever.

A steady dull beeping jerked Tanya from her reverie; her hand stopped moving at her slick groin while the other still held her breast as she struggled to determine what that noise meant. She looked around the escape capsule for a moment, before settling upon it. It was the proximity alert. He was here again. For ten short minutes they would be close. Tanya tugged upon her ankle tether and drifted closer to the porthole.

And there it was—their ship. The ship they had spent their combined life savings on. Her eyes saw it as perfect, the vessel’s white skin unblemished, navigation lights blinking hypnotically. She did not see the darkness, the swaths of black burn marks, nor the lifelessness of the wreck. Tanya just saw it as it was, as it should be.

Her hand reached for a support and she steadied herself in a position to best view their small craft, while her fingers began to move between her legs once more. The near deathly silence in the capsule was broken only by the sole occupant’s soft murmurs.

They had lain there, joined as one, and rutted forever. Or so it had seemed to her. With the tingling effects of the chemical running through her system time took on a warped, surrealistic feeling. Her sight had blurred, the colours running into each other in a distorted miasma of variegated shapes and forms. She was aware only of the sensations of synthetic material pulling at her wrists and ankles, of his body pressed upon the length of hers, and of his cock moving within her. She moved in unison with his thrusts, locked to his erotic tempo in an ancient and primal dance. Tanya felt herself building towards her release, felt him become more vigorous as he too approached his crescendo.

It was so hypnotic, so magical and so intense that she hadn’t even felt the first shudder run through the ship.

He must have though, because she remembered him faltering for a moment, but she had urged him on, greedy for her climax and desperate to feel her love within her—to give him his release. He returned to her and they continued to pleasure each other, the momentary pause soon forgotten as the waves of sensation washed over them again. She had been close—so very, very close.

The next rumbling shudder was intense enough that she felt it quite clearly. The unnatural movement and accompanying sound sending a chill like ice through her passion-addled consciousness. It was an alien thing that screamed danger. But her senses had been too dulled to fully grasp what was happening. He had reacted quicker—stopping and tensing, lifting his body up to twist in the direction the threatening interruption had emanated from. The loss of him as he abruptly left her drew an anguished scream, the cry enhanced by a burgeoning sense of dread. She remembered him freeing one of her wrists with a frenzied tugging, and then he had spoken to her.

Tanya tried to remember those words, the exact last words her love had ever spoken to her. But she had been confused and couldn’t recall them clearly. He had told her to get to the escape capsule while he went to check the problem. She could still remember him trying to keep the fear from his voice, for he knew nothing but an event of grave seriousness could have produced the sort of shudder that had gone through their vessel. As if one cue there was another one, stronger still and they both had swayed to compensate. Then he had kissed her and he was gone.

A silver tear traced its way down Tanya’s cheek as she floated there in her silent capsule. Their ship was almost gone from view, so quickly did it pass. She only had him in sight for a few minutes every day. Her body tensed while the single tear flowed as she brought herself closer to orgasm, trying to recreate their last moment together.

It had all happened so fast. How Tanya had reached the escape pod she couldn’t quite remember. All the while she tried to throw the effects of the drug off, but still her mind was dulled, slowed by its effects. She had entered the capsule—as her lover had instructed—and sealed the door while she waited for his return. There were lights blinking on and off in the small sphere. Quiet but urgent beeps sounded from the control console as a dozen emergency systems vied for her attention. But she didn’t look. Instead her eyes were locked on the round porthole in the capsule door. She had waited for his return for an age, but it was probably less than a minute.

Then he was there. She saw him enter the corridor, moving furiously in the null-gravity, trying to drag himself toward her as fast as possible. His face was a mask of concentration and a wave of panic had flowed through her as she had seen that expression. They were in trouble, something was deadly wrong with their little ship. For some reason she had stood there for a moment, dumb, her hands pressed over her mouth. He had reached the door and began to pound on the hatch, mouthing something. The action had broken Tanya from her self-hypnosis and she screamed something in reply, something inane as she scrambled to open the door.

Tanya cried now in her isolation, as the memories came flooding back. Pain, real physical pain flowed through her as she did so, mixing with the pleasure from her groin to create an agonising cocktail of emotions. She gasped and began to sob, her eyes squeezing tightly shut as though she could hide from her mind’s eye. But the memories wouldn’t go away. She couldn’t return to the moment before this, when everything had been so perfect. She never could.

She had pressed the wrong button.

It took her a moment to realise what she had done, how she had done it. She had been confused, addled, panicked and somehow her hand had lifted that plastic cover and pressed the button shielded underneath. The launch activation button.

Tanya had stared at him—open-mouthed as the automated launch sequence had begun. And he had returned that look, knowing what she had just done; frozen with the knowledge of the fate she had sentenced him too. Their eyes once again communicated this time, instead of their passion and love, they spoke to each other of the utmost horror. His hand had lifted and struck the hatch door once more, weakly, hopelessly. She did not move. She could not move.

Then there had been fire—intense searing flame, almost beautiful in its rich range of hues. Another shuddering rumble had echoed though the ship just before the hungry, licking tongues had arrived, consuming everything in their path. She had seen the incendiary wall behind him for two long second before the inferno had arrived. He had known what her change of expression meant—he had known what was coming for him. His mouth moved silently to form her name, and he died with that name upon his lips as he was engulfed in a burning orange sea. The flame existed only for moments as it feed upon the oxygen within the vessel, but those moments were enough to destroy her ship, her hope, her lover and her life.

There had been a thing at the door after the flame had expired—a hideous, immolated caricature that she could not recognise. The thing had moved before it toppled over backwards to disappear from sight forever. A limb seemed to rise and fall upon the hatch in a gesture of the utmost futility. Then it was gone from sight, erased from her vision but burnt into her mind.

Tanya had begun to scream. She continued to scream as the capsule completed it launch preparations and the explosive bolts blew, ejecting her lone, metal-encased form out into the vast coldness of space. Out into the void. Then for a long time there had been nothing. She had no idea how long there had been that nothingness before some sort of lucidity returned to her.

Tanya sobbed uncontrollably now, and her anguish mixed with other cries as her muscles began to spasm with her self-induced climax. Her back arched as her pain and her release struggled within her for control. She tried to bring herself back to those perfect moments with her love, before the darkness has fallen upon their lives. But it was impossible to erase from her mind the horror of that burnt, blackened thing that had existed outside her porthole for a moment. An eternal moment.

On the instrument panel, lay that fateful button, now shrouded once again by it protective plastic cover. Nearby lay the communications control, responsible for sending out an automated distress signal. But that control panel was dark and silent, shut off at her command. 

For they were meant to be together forever—they had promised each other. And Tanya would not break that pledge to her beloved. She would stay with him for eternity.

Index