Date: Mon, 3 Jun 2013 10:22:36 -0700 (PDT)
From: August Zellner <ahzellner@att.net>
Subject: Julian - Day 7B

JULIAN

Day 7 Part B

For a national park, the Lincoln Boyhood Home is not that large –
seriously, it is about 1/4 mile wide and about 3/4 mile long.  The main
park road enters from the south and runs north (the "long" way) to the site
of Lincoln's family farm and cabin, which is about 2/3 of the way to the
north end of the park.  But as soon as you drive in, there is a side road
that takes you to the Visitor's Center.  Naturally, I wanted to stop there
first and see if they had a park map.

The Visitor's Center is housed in a concavely curved Memorial Building
which supposedly "pays tribute to Lincoln's Indiana roots," but actually
"features two memorial halls and five sculptured limestone panels that mark
significant stages in Abraham Lincoln's life."  So in other words, most of
it has nothing to do with Indiana.  But there's also a theater in there
where every half hour they show an 18-minute movie about Lincoln's time in
Indiana.  Unfortunately Julian and I got to the theater 5 minutes after the
movie started, and I didn't feel like waiting for a half hour to see the
next showing especially when they were selling that movie for only $7.98 at
the gift shop.  So I bought it and a few other trinkets including a
blanket/comforter 36" x 48" with an image of the Lincoln family farm and
cabin on it, and we left.

Across the parking lot from the Visitor's Center a paved walkway leads up
an open landscaped corridor about 75 yards to a flagpole, and in the woods
behind that is a small graveyard where Lincoln's mother Nancy Hanks Lincoln
is buried.  Figuring I'd seen enough graves on my family history trip, I
said, "Let's go see the farm and cabin," so we got back in the car.

The farm and cabin are pretty interesting.  From the parking lot you walk
along a path past a plowed field to both the site of the real cabin (which
is long gone) and a reconstructed cabin and out-buildings and farm animals
and they even have a guy in period costume to tell you all about it.  But
even more interesting was that another car pulled in not long after us, and
out came a family consisting of Mom, Dad and a very pretty little blonde
girl wearing a cute blouse and very short skirt (!) who appeared to be a
little younger than Julian, so maybe 11 or 12?  I can't quite remember what
her name was, but I think it was something like Alicia, so let's stick with
that.

We were actually standing by the plowed field when the other car pulled up.
It was the first Friday in July, the field crops were growing nicely and
Julian was showing off his knowledge of these things – because remember,
he's a migrant farm worker boy, right?  As he said back on Day 2, "If it
ain't one shit-hole pickin' peaches, it's some other shit-hole pickin'
cucumbers."  So when this family with a pretty girl joined us there by the
field Julian just kept on showing off anything he could think of about
crops and growing seasons.

I very briefly explained Julian's appearance to them, i.e. he is a Native
American who belongs to a tribe that lives not far from here, and the face
and body paint and wrist and ankle bracelets are because he has just been
inducted as a tribal elder and warrior (all true except for that last
little embellishment I threw in to juice things up).  I'm a friend of
Julian's family (not exactly true, but not exactly a lie either).  Our new
friends all found this to be quite fascinating.  They didn't say where they
were from, but by the way they spoke and acted I took them for northeastern
suburban liberals, and what suburban liberal would not be fascinated by
having pulled into a national park and finding there a nearly naked young
Native American warrior boy in full face and body paint and wrist and ankle
bracelets who seemed to know all kindsa shit about the kindsa shit a nearly
naked young Native American warrior boy in full face and body paint and
wrist and ankle bracelets should know about?  Right?

And so we all proceeded along the path toward the site of the real cabin
and the reconstructed cabin and outbuildings and farm animals.  I soon
figured out that pretty little Alicia was exspecially fascinated by Julian,
she seemed to be hanging on his every word as he bullshitted away on every
subject he could come up with.  I really had to admire Julian's ability to
impress this little gringita, so as we approached the reconstructed cabin
and outbuildings, I helped give the kids an opportunity to get better
acquainted by maneuvering Mom & Dad into the cabin to listen to the guy in
period costume tell us about life growing up on the American frontier.
Meanwhile Julian steered Alicia toward the barnyard to see the farm
animals, and after all, what pretty little girl in a very short skirt would
not want to see farm animals, and listen to a nearly-naked Native American
boy tell her all about collecting eggs and feeding chickens?

For my part I tried to make it as difficult as possible for Mom & Dad to
stand anywhere in the cabin that would allow them to look out the window
and see how Julian was working his magic on their little daughter, while at
the same time reserving those views for myself so I could clearly see how
those two kids were now holding hands and touching their heads together and
occasionally petting other parts of each others' young bodies too.
Eventually Alicia came in to excitedly fetch Mom & Dad so they could go
look at the farm animals with her, momentarily leaving Julian and me in the
cabin together with the guy in period costume.  As he chatted away about
how young Abe Lincoln had to sleep in the cramped loft above the ceiling of
the one-room cabin, I looked at Julian and he just gave me that shit-eating
grin I had seen a number of times this week – the one that said, just
give me a little more time with this girl old man, just a little more time
...

So at the earliest courteous opportunity I got Julian out of the cabin and
we headed back to where Alicia was parroting back to her parents every bit
of Julian's farm animal bullshit.  But pretty soon Dad said let's go down
to the Visitor's Center and see what they have there and maybe see the
movie too.  That gave me a chance to say well we haven't seen that movie
either.

"Oh Mommy!" said Alicia, "Can I ride down to the movie with Julian?"  Mom &
Dad looked a little dubious about that, but before they could even say
anything I said, "Oh, I'm sorry, but I have all my seats folded down so
there wouldn't be any room for you in my car ..."

"Oh, well then can Julian ride down there with us Mommy?  Please?"  Wow, I
thought, Alicia's got it bad for Julian – and who can blame her, right?

"Well I suppose so," said Mommy, and the two of them hopped into the back
seat of the suburban liberals' car.  As I followed them down the road
toward the Visitor Center I could see those two kids getting as cozy as
they dared to in the back seat, and I was trying to figure out if there
might be some way to separate them from her parents once we got to there.
I glanced at my watch and realized that, once again, the movie must have
just started a couple of minutes ago so it'd be another half hour before
the next showing.

So when we were all out of our cars at the Visitor's Center I spoke up
first and said, "Well it looks like the next movie isn't for another 25
minutes, and Julian and I have already seen the exhibits so ... I was
thinking of taking him up to the historical trail and Nancy Lincoln's grave
up there," pointing up the open landscaped corridor towards the flagpole.

Julian looked at me as if to say ARE YOU INSANE old man??  Why in hell
would I wanna do that??  But immediately Alicia spoke up and said "Oh
Mommy!  Can I go with Julian to the historical trail?  I don't wanna see
some old exhibits anyways!  Can I?  Can I please?"

"Well I suppose so," said Mom, "but be back in time for the movie."  "Oh
don't worry," I said, "they sell the movie at the gift counter outside the
theater ... so how about if you two go see the movie and we all meet right
back here in, say, 45 minutes?"  Mom & Dad were reluctantly going along
with all this, and now Julian looked at me as if to say YOU ARE A GENIUS
old man!!  No I am not a genius – I just have more experience conning
young girls' mommies and daddies than you do.  You should've seen the way I
pulled the wool over Judy & David's mom's eyes on Tyron & Rachel's Florida
vacation!

And so, while Mom & Dad headed off to the Memorial Building exhibits I
quickly snatched the blanket with the image of the Lincoln family farm and
cabin on it out of my car and handed it to Julian before leading the kids
up the open landscaped corridor towards the flagpole. "What's this for?" he
said.  "Oh I don't know," I said, "I just thought maybe it'd come in handy
..." at which point I thought I saw a light bulb come on in his head.

I tried to get those kids as far up the landscaped corridor as I could as
fast as I could so they'd have as much secluded smooching time as possible
– but they were already smooching and cuddling up together so much that
it was hard for them to keep up.  In fact by the time I got to the flag
pole they weren't much more than halfway there, so I waited until they were
pretty close before proceeding into the edge of the forest where Nancy
Lincoln's grave is in a small cemetery.  That's also where the historical
trail starts and I thought maybe that would be a good place for those two
kids to go find a private spot to make out in the woods.

But when I turned around and looked out toward the flagpole, Julian and
Alicia were nowhere to be seen!  Wow, I guess they must've snuck off into
the forest somewhere near the flagpole.  And that turned out to be a better
idea anyway because pretty soon here comes a family out from the historical
trail, stopping briefly at Nancy Lincoln's grave before proceeding down the
landscaped corridor toward the parking lot.  Whew!  My little lovebirds
could've got caught if they'd stayed with me!

So there I was, near the reader board that explains all about Nancy
Lincoln.  Well, I thought, this is a pretty good place to stand watch
because from here I can see some distance down the trail in one direction
and all the way down to the Visitor Center in the other.

And sure enough, as the minutes passed I could hear the sweet sound of
young love coming from the forest near the flagpole.  I could hear them
both giggling and even moaning, and I heard Alicia call out "Oh Julian!
Julian!"  I thought to myself, how long has it been since this forest has
heard that sound – the sound of a native forest boy romancing a young
girl?  100 years?  150 years?  Not since most of the Miami Tribe was chased
out of Indiana in the aftermath of the War of 1812?  Or maybe ... hey,
maybe I've got this all backwards!  Maybe the last young lovers to fuck in
this forest were a pioneer boy and beautiful native girl?  Maybe it was
even young Abe Lincoln himself – getting his rocks off with a little
Indian squaw!!  And now I could hear the forest echo again with the hot
sound of giggles and moans.

Just then a young couple came walking up the landscaped corridor, nodding
hello as they stopped to see Nancy Lincoln's grave before heading down the
historical trail.  If they heard the sexual music coming from the forest,
they didn't acknowledge it.

And soon ... soon I heard Alicia call out again "Oh Julian!  Julian!" and
then a shriek rang out "YEEEEAAAAAAOOUUCCHHHH!!"  And for a moment I
thought I could hear a young girl crying quietly in the forest.  Then all
was quiet for a little while.

But soon there were more moans echoing through the forest.  "Oh no Julian –
don't stop – don't ever stop!"  More moans and yelps – louder now –
"Oh Julian!  Julian!  oooooOOOOOAAAhhh!!  OOOOOOOOoooooohhh!!
OOOOwwwwwwhhh!!"

AAAA!!  EEEEEHH!!  YEEEAAAOOOOOOO!!!  Oh Julian!"

And then ... silence filled the forest again.  The only sound was a few
chirping birds, and a dog barking in the distance.

As the minutes passed I began to worry that our time would soon be up, Mom
& Dad might emerge from the Visitors Center and realize their little
daughter was off in the forest, unchaperoned, with a nearly naked young
Native American warrior boy in full face and body paint and wrist and ankle
bracelets.  As I worried about all this, an older couple made their way up
the landscaped corridor (and by "older couple" I mean they looked about
10-15 years older than me).  As they passed by me to see Nancy Lincoln's
grave I saw the kids emerge from the forest near the flagpole and breathed
a sigh of relief.

I walked toward them so that if Mom & Dad were to come out from the movie
it would look like we'd been together the whole time.  They were still
smooching and hanging all over each other, but as I approached them Julian
handed me the blanket and Alicia took a hair brush out of her little purse
and started to comb her hair out.  Good, I thought, at least she'll look
presentable – not like she just got bitch-fucked in the forest.  Does
she have any leaves or dirt or sticks on her skirt?  But then, looking over
the blanket I could see it had a nice fresh blood stain on it!  Oh SHIT!
And there were some smears too, from where those kids must've wiped the
blood off themselves.  But the good news was that there was a trash can
nearby, so I quickly ditched the incriminating evidence.

Then I began to lead the kids back down the landscaped corridor toward the
parking lot, but they were still smooching and hanging all over each other
and whispering together so much that it was pretty slow going.  I was some
distance ahead of them, but I figured they should have as much time and
privacy as they could get in their last few moments before being inevitably
torn apart forever.

And that really is what happened.  As I got closer to the parking lot I
could see Mom & Dad coming out of the building.  I turned around to see
that the kids had straightened up a bit, just holding hands now that they
were being observed.  Alicia was not crying hysterically or anything, but
you could see she was tearing up and it really was a sad moment when those
young lovers had to say goodbye.  Mom noticed a couple of little sticks or
pine needles or something on Alicia's blouse and brushed them off as they
loaded her into the car, but I acted totally innocent and Mom didn't seem
suspicious.

"I won't ever forget you Julian – I really love you!" Alicia called out
the car window as they backed out of their parking space.  We stood by my
car and waived as they drove away.  I thought to myself – poor girl!
She's "gone native" with an exotic golden brown forest clan elder on her
very first fuck, so now she's totally spoiled and no plain old wimpy little
white boy will ever be good enough!

"Wow!  That was ssssooooo fuckin' hot!" Julian said.

"Really?  Really??  That's all you can say about it?" I said, but we were
both giggling and smirking as we piled into the car to leave.

From the Lincoln Boyhood Home National Park it is almost as far to Fresh
Links as it is to Montpelier, so over an hour, and it was late in the
afternoon (but remember, the sun was still high in the sky because sunset
was over four hours away).  As we drove along, Julian reached into his
plastic bag, pulled out his beige cargo pants and put them on over his blue
running shorts.  I smiled to myself and thought, aside from the body paint
and bracelets, now he looks exactly as he did on the day I picked him up in
Georgia a week ago.

Then he decided to be a little forthcoming about his time with Alicia.  "So
guess what, gringo?" he said, "I ate her pussy!"  "Really?!" I gasped.
"Yeah really!"

"So, what was that like?" I probed.  "It was pretty good!" he declared.
"And I stuck my finger up her cunt hole and twisted it around in there too!
... I was tryin' ta do it like that kid in the movie ... and she really
liked it!"

"Yeah I could hear that!" I admitted.  Julian giggled for a minute.  "I
wonder other chiquitas will like it ... ?" he mused as he looked out the
window.  "Oh yeah!" I encouraged him.  "Like I was telling ya, all girls
like it!"  Now see? I thought to myself, I was right all along – that
Mexican child porn really WAS "educational"!

"Yeah, and then – and then I fucked 'er!  And she liked that too!" he
said triumphantly.  "Yeah I heard that too!" I said, "and I saw all that
blood all over the blanket."

"Yeaaahh ..." he said slowly, "So, like, what was that about?  Why did she
bleed like that?"

Holy shit! I thought – he has no idea why that happened!  Then it dawned
on me – after all, he said way back on Day 2 that he had really only
fucked a couple of shit-hole fast girls.  Obviously they weren't virgins,
and neither was Lupita, right?  So Alicia was Julian's first virgin ...

"Well," I tried to be delicate and informative at the same time, "that
always happens when it's the girl's first time ... the first time a girl
gets fucked, you have to bust through her hymen and it makes her bleed for
a minute ..."  "Oh wow," He said, kind of softly, "so, like, that was her
first time getting fucked?  Like she was a virgin?" "Umm, yeah," I said.
We drove along quietly and Julian looked out the window.  "So ... it was,
like, a good thing she had a coupla pads in her purse, huh?" he said.

As we drove along, I realized that in this past week Julian probably had
more sex – and higher quality sex – than he had had in the rest of
his life up to that point.  Wow – and all under my watch too!  I smiled
to myself proudly.

Anyway, as you drive north on US Route 123 from Lincoln's Boyhood Home you
pass through a couple of towns until you get to Casper, which is the county
seat of TwoBoys County.  That's where you turn off onto a much smaller
state road to go through the Hoover National Forest on your way to Fresh
Links.  There was a lot of fast food in Casper and Julian was hungry, so I
drove him thru McDonald's one last time.  "But I'm not getting anything for
myself here," I said, "I'm sick of fast food.  I'm gonna wait until I get
to Fresh Links and go to a nicer place."  Julian did not care.  So off we
went into the wilderness.

Once we were in the middle of nowhere I opened my window "to let some fresh
air in."  Then I said, "Hey Julian, let me see your phone for a minute."
He handed it to me and I looked it over as I drove along.  It was, of
course, a cheap-ass 7-11 pay-as-you-go phone.  I removed the back cover and
pulled out the battery as Julian watched quizzically.  Then I took the
little memory card out.  Once I had those things out of the phone I gave
Julian a smile and pitched the phone out the window as far into the forest
as I could.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!"

"Now don't freak out," I said.  I snapped the memory card in half and flung
all the little parts out the window too.  Then I reached down into the
storage cubby on the driver's side door and pulled out a brand new iPhone
and waved it at him.  "My going away present to you!" I said and handed it
over.

"Whoooaa!" he said and stated to inspect his new mobile device.

"Yeah, so, it's not like I could let you keep a phone with all my contact
info on it or something," I explained, "so I picked that up for ya
yesterday afternoon on my way into Fresh Links.  I figure having a top of
the line smart phone with internet and a bunch of games and software on it
is gonna make life in the forest a lot smoother.  Should help with school
too."

"Wow, this is way cool!  You're the best!" said Julian.

"Yeah well, it's not nearly all set up – there wasn't enough time to do
that when I was at the AT&T store yesterday."  After rolling up my window I
reached into the cubby again and pulled out an iTunes card.  "So you're
gonna have to go back to the store yourself and get that all squared away.
But I paid for everything, and set you up a temporary account, and paid for
6 months worth of service to get you going – but hey – after that
you're on your own, okay?  Hopefully by that time your parents and uncle
and whatnot should be settled in and have their jobs here and everything."
Then I handed him the card. "And I put $300 on this iTunes card for ya –
should be enough to load that sucker up with all the crap a kid could ask
for."  "Wow, thanks!" he said.

After fiddling around with the phone for a minute Julian asked, "Hey is
there a charger?"  I reached down into the cubby one last time and pulled
out a bag.  "Yeah, it's in here – and the box and receipt and everything
is in here too.  Don't lose the receipt, okay?"  "Oh shit," he said, "where
am I gonna be able to charge this up anyways?"  "I don't think that's gonna
be a problem," I said, "just plug it in somewhere at the resort when ya
need to."

"Oh yeah right," he said.  Then he laughed.  "And besides, the chief says
he knows how ta set up some solar generating stuff in the village clearing,
and do some other shit like that too.  Him and Uncle Tito were mockin' out
Lupita's clan elders yesterday on account of them bein' so strict about
everything.  He don't want our people to come all the way here and have it
be like just another shit-hole.  He says he wants everybody in our clan to,
ya know, ackshully WANNA come here, and live good together and be happy in
our forest instead of miserable."

"Well I can't blame him for that!" I said, "Sounds like your chief has a
lot of good ideas."  And so we drove through the Hoover National Forest and
talked about a lot of things, until at last we came to the little dirt road
that goes to the forest villages.

"This has been a lot of fun," I said, "I am really glad I decided to pick
you up last week."

"You didn't decide anything," Julian point out, "cuz Jesus and the angels
made ya do it."  Then he added, "But still, I'm glad you were the one.
You're a good guy even if you are a pervert."  As he was reaching in the
back door to pull out his plastic bags full of his stuff, I said, "Yeah
well I'm glad I was the one too.  Good luck with everything Julian."

He set his bags down on the little dirt road, and then he came back to the
car and leaned into the passenger side window with his arms on the car
door, just the same as he had done that very first time we looked at each
other.  I could even smell his sweaty odor again, one last time.  "Hey
gringo," he said, "I'm not 16 years old and I'm not 11 either."

"No surprise there," I said.

"Yeah well ackshully I'm 14.  I just had my birthday a few weeks ago."

"Now that sounds about right," I said.  "So now I'll tell you my name is
not Scott."

"Oh I knew that," he said, "Ya know, I never called you Scott even once the
whole time."

"Yeah well ackshully my name is B –"

"Don't even tell me – I don't wanna know," he said, "It don't change
nothin' anyways, right?"

"Goodbye Julian," I said, "you're a great kid."  He stepped back and stood
near his bags for a moment while I took one last photo of him and put my
car in gear to leave.

***

As I drove away I took one last look at Julian in the rear-view mirror as
he picked up his bags and walked down the little dirt road toward his new
life in the forest.  I knew I'd miss him, but I was also quite happy for
him too.  So much had happened in the last week – I had picked up a
dirty runaway migrant worker boy in Georgia, and today I had just dropped
off a young forest clan elder, a hero to his people even.  As I drove along
the twisting road past the far end of the golf course and into the town of
Fresh Links, I felt good about everything.

It was about 7:00 pm on Friday.  I called my wife as I drove into Fresh
Links, and told her all about by trip to the David County Amish Country and
Lincoln's Boyhood Home National Park – well, I didn't tell her
EVERYTHING of course, but I did tell her I took a lot of pictures and I'll
show it all to you when I get home Sunday.  Of course, all those photos
were on the main memory card, and all the photos of Julian were on the
other, secret memory card, which would remain forever hidden in my secret
hiding place.

I hadn't eaten yet, so I told my wife I think I'll go the Red Lobster.  She
said oh, Red Lobster will be crowded because it's Friday, but I said Honey,
this is Fresh Links, Indiana – how crowded can it be?  I'll call you
again when I get back to the timeshare.

Which I did.  We talked for a while, and I told her I love her and I miss
her (which is all true!) and I'll call you tomorrow morning.  I want to get
a good night's sleep because I have a long day of driving ahead of me
tomorrow.  I love you darling – good night.

But first I need to back up all my photos from today, and organize my
stuff, and pack.  I backed up the main camera memory card onto my main
laptop – the one from home, which my wife knew I had.  Then I organized
all the family history paperwork from the whole week in Farmlandville and
Vincent, which was a pretty impressive pile of interesting stuff – well,
it was interesting to me anyway.  I wouldn't even get started assembling it
into a new, well-organized, completely updated family history document
suitable for sending to all my relatives on that side of my family and
posting on Ancestry.com for at least a few months, but for now this pile is
organized well enough.

Then I pulled out my other laptop – the older, secret porn laptop from
my secret hiding place – so I could back up the other, secret memory
card, the one with all my photos of Julian.  But when I tried to fire that
laptop up – NOTHING!  Oh shit, what's wrong with this thing?  I fished
out my emergency bootable start-up disk, inserted it and the old gal booted
up fine – BUT it didn't recognize the hard drive.  OOOOOooohhhhhh
ssshhhiitt!  That only means one thing – the hard drive is fried!  A
chill momentarily went through me – you know what this means, right?
Every speck of the porn on that hard drive is lost forever!  It's fuckin'
GONE and I'll never see it again.  That includes all those original video
files and photos of The Mohawk Boy, and a bunch of my photos and videos of
Tyron too (but not all ... not all ...) – it's gone forever, because
seriously, I hope you know that (a) my paranoia about getting caught,
arrested with all that child porn had kept me from ever making a back-up
drive of any of that (just what I need, right? TWO hard drives full of
child porn!?  At least if I only have one, I can always ditch it quick if I
think the cops are coming – toss the laptop into the nearest dumpster
and hope they don't find it there), and (b) I certainly am NOT going to
take this thing to the Geek Squad to be repaired, for fear they might
attempt a "hard drive data rescue" (holy shit! – anything but that!).
No, I'll have to replace the hard drive myself, which is easy enough, but
the old hard drive is toast.  I'll have to smash it with a sledge hammer
before throwing it away too, because if I don't I'll be paranoid that some
scavenger will find it and ...

But once the chill went through me, it was over.

Because it's just porn, right?

"Just porn."

Just porn, porn, porn, "just" porn ... because really, there was a lot of
that shit I hadn't even looked at, or read, for a long time – years even
... so who gives a shit, right?

"Just porn."

I still have lots of child porn – the carefully-edited finished product
DVD's of The Mohawk Boy are right here on the table, safe and sound.
"Afro-Asian Fuck-Fest #6" and "Fucked By Two Black Men" are right here too
– and they aren't even child-porn, they're good old fashioned legal
adult porn – you can't even get arrested for that!  And that USB drive
full of photos and stories.  Then there's all that other porn back at the
secret hiding place, which except for what was on the laptop is again all
legal adult porn, but which I like a lot ...

And then of course there is the secret camera memory card full of photos of
Julian, and the secret camcorder videotape too ... so it's not like I'm
gonna be at a loss for porn, or "near-porn" photos of children that I've
downloaded from the internet.  And ya know, it's also not like I've never
ditched any of my porn before either.  That's actually my pattern.
Periodically I go through my porn and ditch some of it.  I usually start
with the easy marks – shit I haven't even looked at for a while, and
I'll never even miss, so ... off it goes to the recycling bin, and then I
empty the bin.  "Are you sure you want to permanently delete these files?"
Yes.  Goodbye.  Sometimes I use that opportunity to get rid of some really
hardcore shit too – shit that goes too far, at least for me, and I want
to be able to look myself in the mirror and say I really did ditch that
shit forever.  "Are you sure you want to permanently delete these files?"
Yes.  Goodbye.  I'm `free' of it.

This time is a little different though.  The hard drive crash randomly took
with it the good, the bad and the ugly.  Oh well.

I finished packing, and just as I was done with that I decided to take a
look at my pot stash box.  I wasn't gonna smoke any tonight, just look
... why? ... who knows ... but I guess it was a good thing I did because
when I looked in there – what the fuck??  Some of my shit is gone!!  Oh
that little turd! – Julian swiped some of my shit while I was in the
shower this morning!  Well, he didn't swipe everything, so ... what's
missing?  Hmmmm ... one pouch of "Peace of Mind."  Of course, he took the
unopened one, not the half-used one, but that's not so bad.  He could've
been a total shithead and swiped everything!  So I guess that just means
he's not a total shithead, right?  And he didn't take any of the "Funky
Monkey" which is actually my favorite ... oh, and it looks like he swiped
the small pipe too ... and the rolling papers.  But he left the big pipe,
my favorite pipe, so all in all he actually let me off pretty easy ...

Ya know, the truth is, if he'd asked for the stuff he actually swiped,
I'd've given it to him quite happily.  In fact I'd've probably given him
more than that ... the little turd, he only swiped it cuz he thought I'd
say no.  I smiled to myself.  I wonder if he's out there, right now,
getting stoned with Lupita before eating her pussy?  Or maybe he's sitting
in some dirty trailer in the Fresh Links shit-hole with those barrio boys,
passing a joint around to celebrate his good fortune.  I packed up my stash
and went to bed.