Date: Mon, 4 Jul 2005 03:06:37 EDT
From: Dane0824@aol.com
Subject: As The Eyes Have It  Episode One: The 411 On Polo Drive

We all know that one neighborhood where life appears to be perfect. The
perfect house, the perfect car, and the perfect family. We always are
envious of the rich and famous. But what we fail to realize that no
matter how perfect you appear you still have your faults. Polo Drive's
men all know this.



Taylor Throckmorton sat in his living room watching the latest girl's
gone wild movie. Or it was watching him. I guess masturbating repeatedly
tires you out. He was unaware that his wife had driven up and was on her
way up the stairs. She opened the door.

"Taylor, can you help me... Lauren stopped in mid-sentence as she saw
one of the girls playing with herself. "Taylor!" Taylor jumped up. He saw
the movie still playing and his wife standing looking at him in horror
with his pants at his knees.

"Lauren, I can explain," He said pulling his pants up. He struggled with
his zipper and accidentally zipped his part up. "OW!"

    "Trust me you'll be in a lot more pain when I kick your ass," Lauren
said walking towards him. Their son, Skylar walked in. He saw the movie.

"Whoa! Boobies!" He said excitedly. Lauren rushed and covered his eyes.

"Oh my god! First, you are sitting here pleasuring yourself on our
furniture and now you are exposing our child to that filth," She said
angrily. "What's wrong with you?" Taylor started laughing in spite of the
situation.
"Mommy, what's that white stuff coming out of that man's thingie?" Skylar
asked her. That made Taylor laugh even harder.

"N-Nothing Sky," She said shooing him upstairs. "Go play pokemon or
something"

"But I wan see the girl's boobies," he said anxiously.

"Skylar Andrew Throckmorton go upstairs now," She yelled. Skylar scurried
upstairs. "Oh my god we are going to go to hell for this. Or worse jail.
I can't pee in front of people...

"Lauren, calm down," Taylor said trying to stop laughing.

"Calm down?" She asked him in disbelief. "Calm down? We just exposed our
eleven year old son to porn." Taylor laughed loudly.

"You know he's seen breast before when he went to that girl's birthday
party," Taylor said.

"I still can't believe her mother let her watch striptease," Lauren said
shaking her head. " He is just a little boy. He barely has any hair
down...there"

"He's growing up, Lauren," Taylor said trying to calm his wife down. "He
found a condom a few months back."

"What did you tell him it was?" Lauren asked him.

"Well, he was trying to use it as a water balloon so I explained it to
him that men use it when they want to show their wives how much they love
them" Taylor explained. Lauren calm down but her face contorted in
anger.

"Get rid of the tape," She said getting up and heading to the kitchen.
Taylor almost choked on his tongue.

"Wha...What?" He asked her not hearing her correctly.
"I said get rid of the tape," she repeated as she walked passed him to
get the groceries from outside.

"No way," He said furiously. She handed him a bunch of bags.

"Taylor, you have a beautiful wife who will do virtually anything to
please you and you want to opt to watch a movie with girls, who wouldn't
sleep with you if they were drunk, high on E, and retarded," She said
storming inside.

"Why wouldn't they sleep with me?" Taylor asked offended.

"Because sweetie..." She paused and turned around to whisper in his ear.
"It is really not that big"

Taylor looked at her bewildered. "Not that...Wait, a second you were not
complaining last night when I hit that same spot over and over again."

"Oh sweetie...I was only doing the extra noises because I wanted to see
that new show 'Hell's Kitchen'," She said kissing his cheek. "Now help me
with dinner" She walked back into the kitchen leaving a shocked Taylor
standing stunned.



My husband, Brent walked down stairs wearing his usual suit. As junior
partner of the moist prestigious Law firm in Carson City, he had to keep
up appearances. I sat on the couch looking at Maury Povich's latest baby
mama drama episode.

"Drew." He said from the bottom of the staircase. I didn't answer him. He
stood in front of the t.v.

"I am watching that," I said looking up at him.

"Then answer me when I call you," He said with disdain.

"Yes master," I replied sarcastically.

"Drew, why is everything gotta be all about slaves and race with you?" He
asked me.

"Because you act like you run me," I said to him.

"Trust me, Nobody can run you even if they wanted to," He said with a
smile. "Now how do I look?"

"Like the same corporate jackass you are everyday," I said irritably.
"Now move out the way, honey."

He laughed. "I love you too," He said kissing my cheek.

"When Jawann getting here to clean this house?" I asked him. "With all we
pay her he should be here to clean up."

"It's Jeloni and he should be here shortly," He said with grabbing his
cell phone. "You know if you actually cleaned up we wouldn't have to have
a maid. It's like you have a job." I muted the t.v.

"I am an actor," I said getting up off the couch.

"It's been one year since you did a movie or commercial," He said amused.
"The last movie you did went straight to video so I don't see you
contributing much beside the frequent bitching and headache."

"Don't forget the hot piece of ass," I said with a smirk.

He shook his head. "Whatever. Look I don't have time for this right now,"
he heading to the door. "Just have your hot piece of ass at the
restaurant at 6." He walked out. I fumed with anger. There was only one
way to get rid of my frustrations. I grabbed my phone and dialed the # I
dialed daily for the past 10 months.

"Hello," Brad said. I smiled.

"He's gone," I said to him as I heard a knock at the door. "How long will
it take you to get here?"

"I'll be there in twenty," he said excitedly.

"Make sure you bring the chocolate," I said lustfully. "I have a new
trick to show you." I disconnected the call and headed to the door. "May
I help you?"

A man and a woman stood there. "We are trying to raise money for our
church to be able to take a trip to Six flags and we are selling these
cookies," The man said showing me a box. I smiled.

"Good luck with that," I said shutting the door. I headed back to the
living room.

"God, what a bitch," The woman said to her husband.



Cameron stood on bended knee pleading with his fiancee' not to leave him.

"Audrey, please don't leave me," He begged.

"Cam, get up," She said sternly. "You look pathetic."

"Why are you leaving me two weeks before our wedding?" He demanded from
her.

"He makes me happy," She said with a shrug. "We have the best sex I have
ever had in my life."

"The best sex you have ever had?" He echoed. "Audrey, I am 27. He's 66.
How is that the best sex you have ever had? He probably can't even get it
up."

"What can I say?" She replied as she walked downstairs. "Viagra works
wonders these days."

"You are only with him because he has money," He said following her to
her car.

"You make me sound like a gold digger," She said with a laugh.

"You are a gold digger," He spat out. "That man will probably die soon
and you are fucking him every god forsaken piece of money you can get out
of him."

"Cameron, I do love him," She said kissing him on the cheek. "The money
is just an incentive." She climbed into the car.

"You are a bitch," He said as she drove out the driveway. He attracted
the attention of his neighbors. "I hope you die so I can spit on your
grave." Audrey just laughed and drove off.

"See ya," She called out as she sped off. Cameron noticed his neighbors
looking at him curiously.

"And scene," He said hurrying back up into his home.


Hunter chased after his son in the mall. "Corey, stop running off," he
called out as he struggled with the clothes he held in his hands.

"Catch me daddy," Corey, the nine year old terror said running around the
store.

"That is so sad," A man said loud enough for Hunter to hear. "Can't even
control his kid."

Hunter stopped dead in his tracks. "Oh, you think you can do better?" He
asked angrily. "Instead of worrying about my son why don't you worry
about that big tub of lard you call your son." The man turned a dark
shade of red.

"Hey, he is not fat," The man said to his crying son. "He is big boned."

"Right," Hunter said sarcastically. "And I am not white. I am Caucasian."

"You need to put that boy on some meds," The man retorted. Hunter almost
responded back. Until...

"Dad, come get me," Corey said running out of the store.

"Corey," Hunter said running after his son. He didn't notice the alarms
going off as he rushed off. He caught Corey at the food court. "You
monster! Don't ever do that again."

"I am sorry dad," Corey said looking behind hunter. "Why are those
policemen running after you?" Hunter turned around to see three policemen
running towards him and Corey. He noticed he still had the clothes in his
hands.

"Oh crap," He said as one of the police officers tackled him to the
ground.

"Cool," Corey said as his dad was forced into handcuffs.


I lay in bed as Brad pounded my ass hard. We had used my idea of using
the whipped cream as lubricant.

"Oh baby," Brad grunted as he pumped harder and harder.

"Do something else," I said bored with how long it was taking to cum. He
slowed his pace.

"You...Not...Liking it?" He struggled to get out.

"No," I said with a yawn.

"It's all about you, baby," he said as he began to suck me off. His
tongue made his way to my ass. My boredom suddenly went away as a new
feeling hit me up. Ecstasy.

"Brad," I yelled out in pleasure. He applied more whipped cream. He
lashed at it more and more.  I felt it. I felt the build up. I was about
to...

"Mr. Moody," a voice I never wanted to hear while I was having sex. I
kicked Brad off me and grabbed a robe. I rushed to the door. I looked
back to see Brad hiding on the other side of the bed. I opened the door
to see an anxious Jeloni.

"What are you doing in my house?" I demanded. "No one let you in."

"I-I...knocked but no one answered so I used my Key," he stammered.

"Key? How the hell did you get a key?" I asked shocked.

"Your husband gave it to me," he said showing it to me. "I didn't think
anyone was home but I heard rocking noises so I headed up stairs to
investigate."

"You mean to get your jollies off?" I asked him embarrassed at how much
he heard.

"I just heard noises and I didn't know what to expect," he said looking
at the floor.

"Well, I was trying some self-pleasuring but you ruined that," I said to
him with anger. "I ought to fire you but you and that load of illegal
immigrants you call family begged my husband for a job so I can't fire
you without losing my credit cards. So go grab some lunch and come back
in an hour when I'll be gone." He nodded weakly. "The key." He handed it
to me and ran off. I shut the door.

Brad got up and grabbed me. "Now where were we?" he asked me. I pushed
him away.

"I lost the feeling," I said heading the shower. "Make sure he is gone
before you leave." Brad walked out angrily.



The residents of Polo Drive all sat in the local church for the funeral
of an annoying friend, Sean Ford. His wife Justine sat in the front of
course with her family. Taylor and Audrey sat in the fourth pew.

"I can't believe you fake it," He whispered to her. She sighed.

"I can't believe you jack off to porn still," She countered. "What are
you 16? It's cheating."

"It is not cheating," Taylor said a little loud. People shot him angry
looks. "Sorry"

Cameron and Hunter sat a few rows back. He fumed along with his best
friend.

"Audrey left me this morning," he said angrily. "She has been having an
affair with a 66 year old man."

"That sucks," Hunter said sarcastically. "When you tell people what
happened you gonna say you left her?"

Cameron scoffed. "No," he said with a fake laugh. "Yes. Yes, I am."

"Well, if it makes you feel better, Corey almost got me arrested today at
the mall," Hunter told him.

"That does," Cameron joked.

Brent grabbed his palm pilot. He was trying to schedule appointments.
"Put that away," I hissed. "We are at a funeral."

"For a guy everyone hated," Brent said absent-mindedly. He looked up.
"You'd understand if you had a more meaningful job than the sometimey
actor and washed up model." I raised my hand to slap him.

"Thank You for volunteering to say something, Mr. Moody," The reverend
said from the front of the church. All eyes were on me. Brent smirked at
me evilly.

I headed up towards the front. Hunter whispered, "We are in church so you
can't lie." I glared at him. I made my way up to the front where the
casket laid half opened. I tried not to look in it. Shawn had been hit by
a car and they did they're best to fix his face but he didn't look
normal. The reverend handed me a Mic. Brent looked at me with his evil
grin.

"Shawn was a great person who will be missed," I said nervously. "He was
one heck of a busy body though." Taylor smirked at me as Cameron and
Hunter chuckled at my discomfort. Brent yawned. "Jackass." Everyone
gasped at me.

"Oh my," The reverend said in utter shock.

"You are so pathetic," I continued as he sat smirking. "You wanna talk
about me. How about we talk about you? At least I can get it up with my
husband having to assist me. At least I don't cry when I cum unlike you."
The people gasped again.

"It was one time that I cried," he said defensively. "Besides it was just
a tear.'

"Well, too bad I picture your brother when we have sex," I said to him.
He threw the palm pilot at me. I ducked and it hit a candle that fell
into the casket.


"Dear god," Justine said fainting. I grabbed a cup out of a man's hand
and threw the liquid into the casket. Shawn went up in flames. I smelled
the cup.

"It's three o'clock in the afternoon," I said to the apparent alcoholic
man. The people all rushed up to savage what they could of Shawn.

Cameron, Taylor, and Hunter walked over to me. "Wow," Taylor said as the
chaos erupted. "Well, Drew, you just gave them a free cremation." I
rolled my eyes and noticed that Brent had left. Oh well...

***********************************************************

Okay, I know this chapter might seem rushed but I actually liked it. I
decided against making it like a gay version of desperate housewives and
make it more of a naughtier version of the show that has proved to be my
favorite. Feel free to email me with your comments about the story.
Consider this Season One and the Series premiere if this would be a show.

Marcopolousa0824@yahoo.com or visit my yahoo page for this and more
stories at
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FalconEyes/