Date: Sun, 17 Sep 2000 05:22:26 EDT
From: Dara Lynn <daralynn_writings@hotmail.com>
Subject: Boy bands/ No Painless Way, chapter 7

Hmm, this came out much sooner than I expected.  Not a very exciting
chapter, but hey, it happens. :)  I'm trying to get this story out quickly,
to please my dear readers, one of whom is quite possibly tearing her hair
out.  Hi Red!!
Thanks as always to David and Nifty, and to everyone who's given me feedback
including Stacia, Red, Aph, Ann, Elly, LJ and Sophie.  It is sooooo
appreciated.

DISCLAIMER:  I am in no way affiliated with the real people mentioned
herein.  This is fiction; it implies NOTHING.

In addition to this, you should be reading: "A Love Like This", "A Tale of
Two Boybands", "Little White Lies", "Hide In Plain Sight", "Chances Are",
"Porcelain", "Nsync: Lance n JC", "A Little Bit of Love", and so many more.
Don'tcha just LOVE this archive?  I do!



~NO PAINLESS WAY~
Chapter 7


"I walked beside the evening sea
And dreamed a dream that could not be;
The waves that plunged along the shore
Said only: 'Dreamer, dream no more!'"
                  - George William Curtis


     Diane Bass sipped her coffee, hardly tasting it.  She pat Lynn's hand
comfortingly, and was answered with a forced smile.
     "Lynn, God will watch over Justin.  We have to keep faith and believe
that he'll be returned to us."
     Mrs. Harless sighed wearily.  "I'm trying, Diane.  That hope is the
only thing keeping me alive and sane right now."
     "You're doing fine.  I wish I had your kind of strength...if something
like this happened to Lance I wouldn't be holding myself together half so
well."  She shuddered.  "If it's any comfort, it can't get worse.  This is
the most horrible thing a mother can possibly go through."
     Lynn nodded slowly.
     "That doesn't help at all, does it?"
     "No.  But thank you for trying.  It's just...nothing can help.  Nothing
will be alright again until I have my baby back."
     Diane's heart ached for her friend, inconsolable as any woman in her
postion would be.  And for J.C., who paced restlessly in the living room,
waiting and hoping, as they all were, for the phone to ring and a stranger's
voice to end this nightmare.  For the boys, all sick with worry for their
little brother.  For everyone, Diane included, who loved Justin and couldn't
conceive of a world without him.
     Detective Larsen had become a familiar face in the house; he was now
questioning the 'Nsync bodyguards in the dining room.  The boys had had a
lot of different security people over the years, but those who had come had
all been with their charges for over two years.  Each was paid to take
risks, blows and even bullets for any of the five singers, but they were
each specifically assigned to one - Lonnie to Justin, Randy to Lance, Todd
to Chris, Eric to J.C. and Mike to Joey.  This system made things easier,
especially on those rare occasions when the group was separated.  Each was
extremely dedicated and protective of his charge.
     Diane suddenly smiled.  "Remember when you and Lonnie first met?"
     Lynn chuckled, grateful for a good memory.  Three years earlier, when
'Nsync had been doing shows in Europe, both she and Diane had still
travelled with the boys during tours, a practice they'd stopped only
recently.  Lynn had had to return to Florida for a few weeks, and flew to
Germany afterwards earlier than she'd been expected to, intending to
surprise Justin.
     She'd gotten as far as the hotel floor where the boys were staying;
halfway down the hallway Lynn was stopped by an enormous black man demanding
to know who she was and how she'd gotten there.  As Lynn searched her messy
purse for her wallet and driver's license, the man calmly informed her that
she was not the first lady to give the 'oh-I'm-Justin's-mom' excuse to try
to get past security.
     Just then Justin had come out of his room and, upon seeing his mother,
ran over.  When he got closer Lonnie effortlessly picked up the
fifteen-year-old and protectively placed his charge behind him.  The boy had
giggled insanely at this.
     "Lonnie, it's okay.  This is my mom."
     The man had been very embarassed and apologetic, but Lynn was touched
by how genuinely caring and concerned he was for her son, and they had been
close friends ever since.  Lonnie was part of the Timberlake/Harless family
as well as the 'Nsync family.
     Randall Timberlake and his wife Lisa had arrived as well.  Justin's dad
had tried to comfort his ex-wife, but was just as distraught and terrified
as she was.  Lisa wasn't doing well either; like Paul, she loved Justin as
though she was his natural parent.  She and Randall were out with an officer
searching Justin's favorite places around Orlando, more to keep them
occupied than anything else.
     Paul was in the living room with J.C. - two of Justin's three dads
keeping a silent vigil by the phone.  Joey was in the family room with
Detective Murray, going through pages of names of people 'Nsync knew and
worked with, past and present, looking for possible suspects.  Chris was
upstairs, probably either pacing the corridors or beating himself over the
head.  Lance was asleep; according to Chris he'd had a terrible dream that
morning.
     Diane frowned.  //My poor baby.//
     She knew that Lance didn't have nightmares often, but when he did they
really shook him up.  Like when his paternal grandmother died...no, she
didn't want to think about that, or what the memory's events could mean.
There were other problems at hand.
------------------------------------------------------------------------

     "Hello?"
     "Korman, it's Elwood.  I know that now that you've been paid you
probably want to move on, but I'd like you to stay in Orlando for a while."
     Korman gripped the cell phone, his hands suddenly sweating.  "Um, I can
do that.  Could I ask why, sir?"
     "Well, I'm a little worried about the boy.  He's a strong little thing
and I don't think he'd try to hurt himself, but I want to be safe.  I'm
going to tell him that if he ever attempts such a thing one of his bandmates
will suffer for it.  As you know, I do not like to lie.  So I'll need you
standing by for a while just in case he decides to test me.  Also I'll have
another assignment for you soon..."
     Korman shivered, though the room was insulated from the damp air
outside.  "'Suffer for it'?  You mean, you might need me to *kill* one of
them?  Sir, I don't think-"
     "You'll *think* what I tell you to think, Korman."  The voice grew
menacing.  "Now, you did a good job this time, but that doesn't mean our
business is concluded.  I don't know when it was that you began to develop a
conscience, but I *warn* you - such a thing is not useful in your line of
work.  This is no different than the dozens of other assignments you've
handled.  Professional kidnappers and mercenaries do *not* need guilt,
understand?"
     Korman swallowed.  "Yes, sir, you're absolutely right.  I'll stay as
long as you need me to."
     The voice grew pleasant.  "Good man.  I assure you, your reward will be
well worth it."
     Korman debated whether or not he should ask how Justin was, if he
really wanted to know, but Elwood decided for him by hanging up without
another word, as he always did.  Korman was partly relieved, not wanting to
think about that sweet boy, trapped in that eerily beautiful mansion with no
hope of escape.  Elwood had never said why he wanted the teenager and Korman
had never asked, but the greedy look in the man's eyes as he'd received his
package offered a few possiblities.
     //Stop it!  Don't think about it!  The boss is right, this is no time
to develop a conscience.  In this line of work that would be death.//
     Korman fumbled for the phone and dialed, suddenly needing to hear his
wife and daughter's voices.  He prayed they wouldn't hear the shaking in
his.
------------------------------------------------------------------------

     Brian Littrell's car came to a screeching halt in front of the large
Carter home.  The white house had a gorgeous view overlooking a private
beach, but Brian didn't stop to enjoy it as he charged inside and up the
long staircase.  Nick's bedroom was the second room on the left, and Brian
stepped through the open doorway, breathing heavily.
     Jane Carter sat on the edge of the bed, arms wrapped tightly around her
oldest son.  She gently rocked him as he whimpered, worry painting the blue
eyes she and most of the family shared.  When Brian came into her sight she
looked relieved, and motioned him inside.
     "I got here as fast as I could.  Jane, what's wrong with Nick?"  The
panic in Brian's voice was obvious.
     She looked at him helplessly.  "He woke up screaming.  I've been trying
to calm him down, but he asked for you.  That's why I called."
     Brian nodded.  Jane didn't know about what Lou had done to Nick, which
was most likely what the nightmare had been about.
     "Can I talk to him alone?"
     She looked at Nick, who wordlessly agreed.  Jane kissed her son and
told him she'd be right downstairs.  With a grateful smile at Brian, she
left the room, shutting the door behind her.
     Brian sat where Jane had been and pulled his best friend and heart's
desire into a comforting hug.  Nick was still shaking and crying, but he was
calm enough to smile weakly.  He greeted his bandmate the way he always had
after waking from nightmares.
     "Hey Frick.  I'm okay."
     Brian drew back to look at Nick's flushed face.  "I wish I could
believe that, Frack.  You don't *look* okay.  You wanna tell me what the
dream was about?"
     Nick's eyes looked like they wanted to refuse, as Nick always did, to
discuss this.  But the boy sighed wearily.
     "It was like the ones I used to have.  At least, it was, until the
ending...God, I thought they'd stopped!  Why won't they go away?  Why do
they make me relive it?"
     Brian took the blond's trembling hands into his own.  "I hate to say
it, Nicky, but maybe because you haven't talked about them.  With us, I
mean, someone besides Dr. Sadler."
     "Yeah, maybe."
     "You finally ready to tell me?"
     Nick's and Brian's eyes locked.  Reassured by the love and concern he
saw there, Nick looked back with trust.  "Okay.  I'll try."
     Brian smiled encouragingly.  "I'm right here, Nicky.  You're safe with
me."
     The blond took a deep breath.  "The dream's usually the same every
time.  I'm in a dark room, and I'm so terrified that I want to run, but
there are no doors.  Then I see myself, only I'm younger, about fifteen, I
think.  Then suddenly Lou's there...he can't see *me*, but he sees the
younger me, ya know, and he pushes me onto this bed that's there and..."
     Nick squeezed his eyes shut, overwhelmed by the memory of the times
this had happened.  Times when he'd been wide awake.
     "It's okay, Nicky.  It's over."
     "...and he starts touching me everywhere, and trying to stick his
tongue in my mouth.  I feel so sick and I keep begging him to stop, but he
just keeps telling me to relax.  Whenever I pull away or try to fight, he
threatens to tell you guys about what a little slut I am, and says that'll
end the group and I'll never see you all again..."
     "Oh, Nicky..."  Brian took Nick into his arms, gently rubbing his back
as the teenager continued bravely.
     "...Lou takes my clothes off and he keeps touching me...you know, down
there, with his fingers and his mouth.  And I'm crying so hard I can barely
breathe and he won't stop he would never *stop*..."
     Nick sobbed for a minute, fighting for composure as Brian rocked him,
the older man weeping silently.
     "And when he's done with me he leans over and just stares at me, like
he always did.  And in the dream I'm watching all this, I'm only a few feet
away but I can't move, and I can't say anything.  Usually then I wake up,
but this morning I just closed my eyes, trying to block it all out.  When I
opened my eyes and looked at the bed, it wasn't me there anymore...it was
Justin."
     "Oh, Nicky, that makes sense.  You're worried about Justin, like we all
are, scared about what happened to him.  So your mind projected him into the
worst place you could think of - Lou's hands."
     It made perfect sense, but Nick shook his head fervently.
     "That's just it, Frick.  When Justin was there instead of me, it wasn't
Lou with him."
     Brian frowned at Nick's confused face.  "It wasn't?  Who was it?"
     "I don't know!  I've never seen him before."
     "This really has you freaked out, doesn't it?  The dreams about
Justin?" Brian asked softly.
     Nick nodded.  "Bri, can we go see J.C. and the guys today?  I dunno
how, but maybe we can help."
     "Sure.  We'll go as soon as you're ready."
     Nick hugged his best friend.
     "Thanks, Bri.  Be right back."  Nick leaped out of bed and headed to
the bathroom.
     Brian looked casually around the messy bedroom, smiling.  No matter how
often Jane cleaned it, give Nick five minutes home and it looked like a
hurricane had been through it.  Well, Brian reasoned, teenagers' rooms are
*supposed* to be messy, at least a little.
     //Not Lou?  But who else would it be?  Maybe it doesn't mean anything,
maybe it was a person who doesn't even exist.//
     Nevertheless, Brian's instincts thought otherwise.  As his gaze fell on
one of Nick's sketch pads, his eyes lit up.
     //It's worth a try.//


~to be continued~
Questions, comments (no flames) to DaraLynn
at DaraLynn_writings@hotmail.com