Date: Wed, 7 Mar 2001 20:36:33 EST
From: Gking0300@aol.com
Subject: Before the Storm/5

I've got the next Before the Storm out (obviously), this'll be the fifth
one now. . If you want me to e-mail you when I update, tell me and I'll be
happy to send you a reminder.  Thanks for reading.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE e-mail me
comments and suggestions.  I'm happy to write back to you and I'll take all
comments and criticisms into account.  Read my other stories if you have
the time; The Day Before Tommorow, At the Beginning with You, Rain, and
Still Every Time.

Hope ya'll like it, and I'll be writing more ASAP, I promise.  Love ya'll!

Gking0300@aol.com
Boygod85@hotmail.com
Gking03@yahoo.com

Disclaimer: this is a complete work of fiction, this is not a
representation of the actual sexual orientation of any of the backstreet
boys.  Meaning, in your dreams. . . maybe.


Before the Storm (5)

Kevin sat on the bed reading, his glasses pushed down to the end of his
nose.  His dark brown hair lay matted to his forehead and his eyes were a
dim green.  As he turned a page, his eyes wandered to looked up at the
blond sitting at the edge of the bed.  He was beautiful, his short hair
hung perfectly, gracing his face.  His wide shoulders tapered to a small
waist and his skin was a flawless cream.

"Nick, talk to me," Kevin said setting the book down on the nightstand.
"If we're going to make this work, you need to talk."

Nick turned around and stretched out on the bed.  "You know what's on my
mind Kevin, you know it's all out in the open now, I just need to talk to
you about it."

Kevin nodded and gently smoothed Nick's hair.  "I'm listening."

"Kevin, I love you more than anything.  You're gorgeous, you're
intelligent, you care for me, you say the right things, you know my ups,
and you know my downs.  But you know how I've felt for Brian, you know how
long I've loved him too," Nick said, his eyes fixed on the patterened
comforter.  "I don't want to leave you Kevin, but I want to be with Brian
so badly it hurts all the time."

Kevin clenched the corner of the sheets with his hand, watching Nick lying
on the bed.  Kevin licked his dry lips and cleared his throat.  "If that's
what you want Nick, I can't stop you.  I'm not going to stand in your way,
and we'll never really be happy if you love someone else."

Kevin wiped a tear from his eye before it fell.  "You can leave me Nick,
without any guilt.  I'm happy if you are."

Nick looked up at Kevin, his eyes shining with his unshed tears.  "You
don't mean that Kevin, I know you don't.  If we're apart, you'll be a
wreck, and so will I.  We both know that."  Nick took Kevin's hand in his.
"It's not that I don't love you Kevin, because that's not true.  It's that
my heart is in two places.  I don't know where to go, I don't know what to
do or how to choose."

Kevin turned away from Nick as tears fell from his eyes, running down his
cheeks.  "Leave Nick, I mean it.  Leave now while I'll let you, while you
can."

"Goddamnit Kevin, stop looking away.  You don't always have to be strong,
you don't always have to pretend everything's alright."

Kevin bent down and put his hands over his face.  "Leave Nick, I'm telling
you."

"Kevin, fucking look at me goddamnit," Nick said calmly.

Kevin slowly brought his hands down from his face and turned around to face
Nick.  Nick looked at the tearstreaked face, the wild brown hair and
emerald eyes.  "Kevin, I can't help it.  I'm falling in love with you all
over again."

"No you're not Nick, it's just pity.  Don't feel sorry for me.  We'll all
be happy if you just go to Brian, go to him now."

Nick moved slowly to Kevin and kissed him, spreading his mouth wide with
his lips.  Thrusting his tounge inside Kevin's mouth, Nick pushed him down
to the bed.  Staring down into Kevin's beautiful face, Nick placed his
hands on either side of Kevin's head.  "I don't know what it is Kevin, but
I feel something when I'm around you.  Whether we're together until
tommorow, or until the day I die, I want this now."

Kevin felt Nick pressing down into him and his mind spun.  Nick's slender
body gyrated erotically on top of him sending pleasure spasming down his
spine.  Closing his eyes, he felt Nick's lips press against his again, a
warm flood of sweet saliva entered his mouth.  Kevin placed his hands on
Nick's back and pushed up his shirt, feeling the warm skin underneath his
fingertips.  Tracing figure eights on Nick's back, Kevin pushed up to meet
Nick's thrusts, pressing their hardness together.

Nick groaned at the pressure and his tounge danced fervently in Kevin's
mouth.  "I love you Kevin Richardson, and I'm not letting anything get
inbetween that."  Kevin clenched his fists as he heard the words, the words
his mind needed to hear, the words he craved.  Nick fumbled with the buckle
on Kevin's pants, quickly pulling the belt from the loops, he unzipped
Kevin's pants quickly.  Kevin pushed up off the bed as Nick pulled the
pants from him, throwing them to the floor.  Nick pressed his face against
the front of Kevin's boxers, feeling the warm pulsating sensation of
Kevin's hardened cock.  Kevin let out his breath in a hiss as Nick blew his
warm breath gently through the thin material driving Kevin insane.  Looking
up, Nick saw the pained expression on Kevin's face.  Quickly, he ripped off
Kevin's boxers and shoved his face all the way down on Kevin's erection.

Kevin's brain registered the warm wet feeling immediately, his fogged brain
immediately went into overdrive as Nick ran his tounge around the shaft.
Kevin clenched his teeth as Nick placed a hand on his chest, gently rubbing
the sweat into Kevin's hard stomach, feeling the muscles tense beneath his
fingertips.  Kevin's breathing increased as Nick took Kevin all the way
into his mouth.  Kevin looked down, watching the way Nick's hair moved
gently, falling in the way of his eyes.

Nick stood up and peeled his shirt off, wet and stained with sweat.
Pushing his sweatpants and boxers down in one swift motion, he lay on the
bed on his back, completely helpless.  "Kevin, I want you to fuck me."

Kevin blinked twice as Nick repeated his command.  "Fuck it all to hell
Kevin, I need you inside me now, I need your body, I need your cock."

Kevin reached for the lube on the bedside table, but Nick smacked his hand
away, his blue eyes danced icily.  "No Kevin, I want you and just you."

Kevin looked at Nick's eyes with apprehension, but seeing the anger and
pain that dwelled in the blond's mind, he moved over to Nick's back.
Pressing his cock at Nick's entrance, he pressed slowly, feeling Nick's
sphincter open to accept his head.  Nick took in a quick breath and pressed
back, sweat beading on his forehead.  "God I love you Kevin, fuck me, make
love to me."

Kevin sunk his hardened shaft all the way into Nick in one quick motion,
driving the head deep into Nick's warm body.  Nick winced at the quick
intrusion, but as Kevin pulled out, the sensations of skin against his
prostate sent Nick into heaven.  "You are unbelievable Nick," Kevin hissed
as he continued to drive forcefully into his lover.  Nick pressed back
against Kevin as he relaxed into the rhythm.  Kevin placed his hands on
Nick's shoulder, massaging the wet skin gently as he closed his eyes,
concentrating on the sensations spreading quickly through his body.
Feeling his pleasure building, Kevin pushed once more into Nick slowly.
"I'm gonna cum Nick," he said urgently.

Nick pushed back hard as Kevin's pace sped up.  "Fuck Nick, god you make me
feel so good," he whispered urgently as he felt his orgasm begin.  The
pleasure washed through Kevin's mind and his fingers raked down Nick's back
leaving ten deep red lines on his back.  Nick felt Kevin's cum flood into
his body and he writhed beneath his lover as he felt the warm sensations.
Kevin collapsed on to Nick, his body completely exhausted.  Pressing his
nose into the back of Nick's hair, he inhaled the sweet scent of shampoo
and the intoxicating smell of Nick's body.  Sucking gently on the back of
Nick's neck, Kevin rolled Nick's skin between his teeth, tasting the salt
of the sweat.

Nick rolled over, and Kevin looked up into his eyes, seeing the desire and
lust.  Kevin forced himself down on Nick's six inches, feeling the head
press hard against the back of his throat.  Nick's hands traveled to
Kevin's head, and he pressed down on every thrust.  Green met blue as Nick
released his sweet cum into Kevin's mouth, feeling the warmth of the liquid
collecting in Kevin's mouth.  Kevin quickly moved up on top of Nick,
pressing him down into the bed.  Nick opened his mouth and Kevin kissed him
deeply.  Nick smiled as some saliva spilled over the side of his mouth and
sighed contentedly as Kevin bent down and licked it from his chin.

The weight of Kevin's body pressing down on him relaxed Nick, and he kissed
Kevin again, savoring the sweet taste of his lover's mouth and the faint
salty taste of the cum.  "You make me feel so good Kevin, I love you so
much," Nick murmered into Kevin's neck, flicking out his tounge to gently
massage the wet skin.  Kevin gently rolled off Nick, turning on his side to
look into Nick's eyes.  Nick sighed and pressed his head into Kevin's
chest, feeling it rise and fall with each breath.

"I love you too Nick," Kevin said slowly as he felt sleep pull his eyelids
down.

"Goodnight Blondie."

"Night Boo."

Kevin raised an eyebrow as he heard his old nickname.  Smiling, he wrapped
an arm around his boyfriend.

*****

"Nick, you in there?" Brian asked after knocking softly at Nick's door.
"I, I need to talk to you."

Brian heard sheets being pushed down and the soft tread of feet on the
carpet.  The door opened and Nick poked his head out into the hall.  By the
soft light, Brian saw the reddened eyes, bloodshot from the lack of sleep
and the wet dark blond mess of Nick's hair.  The blue eyes seemed dull and
blank, their former sparkle tamed to a gleam.  "Bri, what's up," Nick
stated more than asked.  "You need something?"

Brian shifted awkwardly.  "No, I just wanted to talk to you," he said
slowly, his eyes searching the patterned carpet.  Looking back up past
Nick, his eyes scanned the room.  "Mind if I come in?"

Nick shook his head and walked quietly back to the bed, sitting down on the
edge.  "What do you need Brian?" Nick asked cheerfully, but the tone of his
voice gave away his exhaustion.

Brian sat down next to Nick and wrapped his arm around him, pulling them
close together.  "I need to talk to you about everything that's happened in
the last couple days," Brian started.  Seeing the haunted look in Nick's
eyes, he dropped his arm to the bed and absently traced patterns on the
cover.  "That is, if you feel comfortable talking about it right now.  I
don't want to push you, give the word and I'll leave."

Nick shrugged and got up from the bed.  Pulling a sweatshirt from the floor
underneath the bed, he pushed it over his head, wet spots appearing on the
worn, wrinkled fabric from his damp hair.  "I still have this sweatshirt
Brian," Nick said quietly returning to his spot on the bed.  "I sleep in it
every night."

Brian nodded and continued to stare off into space.  "Nick, I know you have
Kevin, and I have Dawson," Brian said trailing off.

"But?" Nick asked plainly, his voice monotone, void of emotions.

Brian cleared his throat and crossed his ankles, rubbing his leg with his
toes.  "But I have to talk to you about that.  Dawson is wonderful Nick,
he's everything I could want in a man."

"But?" Nick asked again.

Brian sighed.  "But he's not you."

Nick willed the tears away, but he felt the wetness collecting at the
corners of his eyes.  "I know Brian, I tried to make myself stay with
Kevin.  I love him, he's wonderful.  He's everything I could want and more,
but he's not you.  God Brian, I feel this overwheling attraction to you and
I can't explain it.  Whenever I'm around you, I feel so alive, I feel so
loved."

Brian pulled a kleenex from the stand next to the bed and gently bent in
front of Nick.  Reaching up, he wiped the tears from Nick's eyes and
cheeks, feeling the blond's body tremble beneath his touch.  "I love Kevin
so much, why is this happening to me," Nick whispered as Brian stood up.
"It's not fair; not fair for him, and not fair for me."

Taking Nick in his arms, Brian let him cry out the frustration on his
shoulder, feeling the delicate friction of their bodies against one
another.  "It's okay Nick, everything's going to be fine," Brian murmered
softly.

"No it's not," Nick managed to gasp out through his tears.  "It's not
Brian, you don't understand how much shit I've gone through, how much I've
put Kevin through and how much more he's going to have to face."

Brian loosened his grasp from Nick, letting him sink to his knees in
defeat.  "I'm causing too much trouble here, I have to leave," Nick said
quietly, his tears abruptly stopping.  "I have to get out of here, I have
to get out of here," he chanted like a mantra, his mind spinning, the world
collapsing.

Brian bent down and hugged Nick to him.  "No baby, you're not causing any
trouble, and you're not leaving.  I'm not letting you slip through my
fingers one more time.  I've let you get away so many times in the past, I
can't let myself make that mistake again."

Nick looked up at Brian suddenly, his blue eyes wide.  Brian's heart
stopped as he looked lovingly down at Nick's face, the red, bloodshot eyes,
the perfect nose and lips, the creamy white of the skin, the shining trail
of tears down his cheeks.  The next words caused Brian's heart to jump into
his throat, and the adrenaline to cascade into his system.  "Brian, will
you be my boyfriend?"

Brian took Nick's hands in his lap, the real world seemed to melt away like
a mirage.  Time froze as Brian smiled and pulled Nick to his feet, their
lips meeting in a kiss preserved forever.  "Yes Nick, I'll be your
boyfriend."

*****

"Kevin, talk to me," Nick pleaded bringing his hand up to Kevin's face,
forcing him to make eye contact.  Kevin looked away again to the window,
his jaw set and his eyes void of expression or emotions.

"There's nothing to talk about, Nick," Kevin said quietly turning out the
bedside lamp, the room immediately plunged into darkness.  Nick's eyes
gradually became accustomed to the dim lighting, and he sighed, twisting
his fingers uncomfortably in his lap, trying to pull Kevin's sillhouette
out from the black of the shadow he was hidden in.

"Yes there is Kevin, there is something to talk about, you know it," Nick
said, his voice strained with emotion, hoarse and quavering slightly.  "I'm
together with Brian."

Kevin seemed to wince slightly, but only a slight movement in his cheeks
gave it away.  A small sign, but one that Nick immediately picked up on.
"God Kevin, I'm so sorry, I never saw this coming," he said taking on of
Kevin's hands in his.  Kevin felt Nick's hand take his, but his body was
numb, his mind and heart in shock and greif, his motor control completely
involuntary.

Like a sudden shock of realization, Kevin jerked his hand out of Nick's
grasp, pulling his knees up to his chest, his eyes closed and hands
clenched together.  "Why, why me?"

A stab of pain flew through Nick's chest as he watched Kevin begin to cry.
"God I'm so sorry Kevin, I never meant for this to happen, why do I cause
everyone so much pain?"

Kevin shook his head and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.  "No
Nick, this isn't your fault," Kevin said in barely a whisper.  "I love you,
remember that."

Nick tore his eyes away from Kevin, unable to wipe the pained look on his
face, the betrayed haunting expression behind his handsome face, the
gorgeous body wrapped tight to itself, hiding from the world.

Nick got up from the bed and almost ran from the room, slamming the door
behind him.

Kevin bent his forehead down, his hands finding their way up to his head,
curling and pulling his messy auburn locks.  Finally, a dreamless sleep
crept over Kevin Richardson's tortured body and mind.  Falling asleep, a
picture of Nick's face appeared from the unknown realm of his mind, the
beautiful face and blond locks stayed burned into his memory for eternity
as his heart tried to find refuge from the man who he loved, and could
never again return the favor.

*****

Nick crawled up from inbetween Brian's legs, wiping the back of his hand
across his lips.  His blond hair was matted down to his forehead, and beads
of sweat stood out on his lean, muscular body from the glare of the harsh
overhead lights.  Brian's slightly muscled chest heaved slightly as his
breathing began the decline from its orgasmic high.  Clutching the
wrinkled, sweaty bedsheets, Brian smiled and licked his dry lips as Nick's
breathing also returned to normal.  Collapsing onto his new lover, Nick's
eyes closed slightly, trying to block out the morning light.  "'morning
babe."

Brian grinned and ruffled Nick's damp hair.  "And what a way to wake up,
damn, I could get used to this."

Nick giggled into Brian's chest and flicked his tounge out, tasting the
hot, damp skin.  Brian pulled Nick up his body and kissed his lips gently.
Nick toyed with a lock of Brian's hair as his lips found Brian's neck, his
tounge swirling around the smooth skin, tasting the faint salty lingering
of the cum.

"I love the way you smell after sex," Nick said softly as Brian wrapped his
arms around Nick's naked body, pulling them close together.  Brian looked
up at Nick skeptically raising one eyebrow.

Nick blushed slightly and kissed Brian's nose.  "I dunno, you smell good,
like a man."

Brian nodded and his hands wandered down to the small of Nick's back,
feeling the moist skin and the slight bump of the spinal cord beneath the
skin.  "I love the way you smell all the time," Brian said smiling,
pressing his nose into Nick's neck and inhaling.  "Mmm, I can still smell
the cologne from last night."

Nick squirmed and bit Brian's earlobe playfully.  "And I still hurt from
last night."

"Really?  Are you sure I didn't hurt you?" Brian asked, concern showing
through on his face as Nick's teeth found yet more expose skin to nibble.

"No babe, it's a good kind of hurt," Nick said softly running his hands
along Brian's sides, feeling the warmth of his lover's body.  Shifting,
Nick felt Brian's growing hardon beneath his slim body.  Gyrating down
erotically, he closed his eyes and breathed out slowly.  "You want a repeat
performance?"

Brian breathed out quickly and pressed up against Nick, his body aching
with desire.  "You don't know what you do to me Nick, you have no idea."

Nick dug his arms into the bed, wrapping them snugly around Brian's neck,
pulling his head up to join their lips in a sealed lock.  Brian thrust his
tounge into Nick's mouth, feeling the saliva run between them, and tasting
the cum he deposited minutes earlier.  Brian danced his index fingers along
Nick's back making the blond shiver from the erotic touch.  Brian slyly
moved his lips to Nick's ear.  "I want you to fuck me."

Nick looked at Brian and gave him a crooked smile.  "Just tell me when."

Brian rollled over and smiled.  "When."

*****

TBC. . .