Date: Mon, 28 May 2012 07:37:31 +0000
From: J-dot M <catsfan1@hotmail.com>
Subject: In the Name Of Love (Gay/Celebrity/Boy-Bands/Brian-2-Justin)

In the Name Of Love

Written by JM

*** Disclaimer: I don't know any of them.  Matter of fact, I probably never
will.  I do know fiction.  She's a nice lady and she'll let you know that,
"This is all fake." I don't know if all the things are accurate from a
timeline perspective so forgive me for that.  These story is not intended
to declare the sexuality of either of the celebrities (Brian Littrell or
Justin Timberlake) represented, so please do not harass these men if you
ever meet them ***

-- Please send all thoughts and comments to: catsfan1@hotmail.com --
Never seen a love like this before
It's so amazing that you always leave me wanting more
Like the perfect addiction baby
It's got my attention, yeah

He's never been comfortable with pure bliss.  Flashes of happiness, breaths
of satisfaction, sheer moments of unaltered coziness: he's welcomed them
all.  Bliss?  He doesn't welcome it.  He knows it leads to disaster,
change, a high right before the comedown.  He's shielded himself enough
through life not to fall for the traps, the way bliss always dangles in
front of him so enticingly.  Through Britney, Cameron, Alyssa, Jenna,
whomever, he's always known to let it reach just the tip of peaking before
backsliding to the beginning before it wears out its welcome.

Yet, sometimes, it slips in and flips him lopsided.

Justin's not sure why Brian's bed feels better than his own back in Los
Angeles.  It's not any fancier; the mattress isn't made out of the clouds
from Heaven.  It's just a bed, in a gated community in Atlanta, and it's
not his.  But it's the only bed in the world that he can lay like this in,
two o'clock in the afternoon, without any cares.

He stretches languidly, muscles disentangling, yawning softly.  His mind is
a lucid dream, his smile uncontrollable as he looks up to the ceiling
above.  The sun is glowing over his skin, melting warmth from a quiet,
early spring day encouraging him to lay in nothing but a faded Lucky Charms
T-shirt and white boxers.  He's scratching at his chest through the thin
fabric of his shirt, cheeks sore from smiling but it doesn't matter because
the minute he catches Brian leaping onto the bed like a movie stuntman he
knows that smiles not leaving for hours.  He's laughing loudly, nearly
rolling off the bed as Brian bounces up and down, childlike and
unintentionally adorable.

"I don't even know why I bother unpacking two weeks' worth of suitcases
knowing I'm going to have to pack three weeks' worth in less than a month,"
Brian remarks, settling down onto the bed until he's lying on his back
beside Justin.

Justin lazily turns his head to the right, smile barely hidden behind the
way his biting the corner of his bottom lip.  He's got a raised brow,
thumbs drumming on his chest as Brian stares back with eyes bluer than
painted skies.

"That soon?" Justin wonders, grinning with rolled eyes when Brian shoots
him a Jim Carrey grin.

"Oh yeah. The BSB train doesn't stop in one destination for long," Brian
chimes, arm raised to motion a railroad conductor pulling on the chord.

Justin turns his head away, tries not to think of his own impending
departure back to the west coast in less than a day.  He pats his hands
along his chest, creating his own marching band melody as Brian creates
trumpet noises with his mouth.  He can't help the snickers that break his
lips midway but Brian continues solo, giddy in his own world for a moment.
He sighs quietly, tilted smile as Brian shimmies from side to side on his
back, and tries to kill the silence but Justin lives for it.  He takes in
every breath of it, every second he's around Brian while the rest of the
world exists.

"What time is Baylee coming back?" Justin wonders, stretching again.

"Who knows?  Kid gets around the neighbors' kids and goes all Godzilla for
a few hours.  I'm sure Lisa will eventually take him in as one of her own
and start feeding him supper with the rest of her brood," Brian insists,
hands moving wildly as he speaks.

Justin grins, turning to look at Brian again.  "'Supper'?"

Brian snorts, lightly punching Justin in the shoulder.  "Don't give me
crap.  You're from the south.  Don't tell me Lynn never called you in with
a cowbell saying `Supper's on.'"

"Not even B," Justin laughs out, rubbing at his shoulder.  He doesn't
flinch when he feels the soft press of Brian's lips to his shoulder, heat
exploding from that spot to the rest of his body.

"You like the little guy a lot," Brian jests, words almost quiet and
bashful.

"I do," Justin whispers back, unexpected warm smile parlaying his lips.  He
rubs the top of his own hand, fingers grazing over soft brown hair.  "I
love the kid a lot.  He's a miniature you and, I mean, he's great.  He
just..."

Brian's easing a hand over Justin's mouth, muffling his jumbled words with
a grin.  "You had me when you said you love him Justin."

Justin's nodding slowly when Brian's hand dances away, replaying his own
words with a little astonishment.  He chuckles to himself, eyes looking
back to the ceiling rather than Brian.  He fights off that overwhelming
feeling that leaves him reverted to that `little girl' state he tries to
avoid with Brian.  "Like I love you man."

"Such a man's man," Brian jokes, fingers tickling just beneath the hem of
Justin's shirt, tiptoeing over the skin of Justin's side.

"Damn right."

"Want me to go crack a beer open for you so you can lay here watching the
game with one hand in your pants?" Brian wonders teasingly with an
effeminate voice.

Justin rolls his eyes once more, rolling to his side so that he's facing
Brian.  He drags his fingers through Brian's bangs, pushing the silky
sun-kissed blonde hair back.  Those blue eyes are wild like Baylee's but
wondrous like only Brian's could be.  He loves the way Brian settles
underneath his touch, nothing like that man so long ago in some Atlanta
hotel suite.  It's a calmness Justin rarely knows himself to carry beneath
the touch of anyone.

"Got something on your mind Jolly Green Giant?"

"No," Justin whispers back, cracked smile against ruddy lips.  He wants to
laugh at the way Brian's eyes are disbelieving but it doesn't happen.  His
thumb sweeps over Brian's temple, faith far from waning.  Those chiseled
cheeks on Brian's face, quiet pink lips, scratches of hair across chin and
jawline, all these features that encompass a man that Justin will never get
used to desiring so much.

Just the prickling of nirvana against his skin leads Justin to fall back
down onto the bed.  His eyes are off Brian again, looking upward, instinct
drowning out the way it all feels inescapable and wonderful.  He tries to
let his mind tread miles away from all of this.

Justin's eyes get a little wide when Brian crawls on top of him, hovering
over him with hands on either side of Justin's head on the bed.  He's got a
half-baked smile while looking at Brian, curious brow rising as Brian gives
him a crooked grin with crinkled eyes.  Instinct gets the best of him,
large hands easing up Brian's legs to his hips, holding him there as Brian
tilts his head.

"I love you too man," Brian says, almost matter-of-factly and Justin fakes
a dumbfounded expression for him.

"So this thing we're doing is kind of mutual, huh?" Justin questions,
broken laughter escaping his lips when Brian peers at him.

"Prick."

"Such language," Justin wheezes out, stomach muscles tightening from
laughter when Brian snatches a pillow from behind Justin to cover up his
face, the laughter still piercing through the cottony softness of the
pillow.

Justin reaches to the side for his own pillow, smacking Brian in the head
with it.  There's a childlike smile sewn into his expression, Brian's eyes
large and disbelieving.  He shrugs, bottom lip sucked in as Brian shakes
his head, throwing the pillow over Justin's face again.

"I'm not into the suffocation thing during sex B.  I'm more of a ball gag
and tie-me-up kind of guy," Justin says from behind the pillow, wild grin
ironed across his lips when Brian snatches the pillow away.

"You're sick."

"Wanna try it out one day, don't ya?" Justin asks, eyebrows wagging at
Brian.  He catches the way fire ignites across Brian's cheeks, snickering
and snorting as Brian looks away.  He doesn't need an answer because
Brian's erection through his jeans is strong and true against Justin's
stomach.  He gives Brian's inner thighs a small squeeze, praying his own
erection doesn't peek through the front flap of his boxers.

"I don't know what to say to you sometimes," Brian remarks with a laugh,
the sound a sweet combination of disco brilliant coyness and orchestral
naiveté.  Justin smiles at the way Brian's leaning down close, their faces
barely a breath apart.

"Don't worry.  I'll make it up to you later on with a really good blowjob,"
Justin chimes, devious wink as Brian shakes his head with shyness.  He
pushes his head up to steal a quick kiss from quiet lips.  He leaves his
eyes open, watches the way Brian's intuitively shut while kissing Justin.

"You better."

"I don't know how to give anything less than the best quality blowjobs,"
Justin mocks, grinning through another kiss.  He nips at Brian's bottom
lip, no hesitation in his kissing.  He knows how to do this, how to never
overthink this part.  The physical is natural, the way every piece of him
wants to roll Brian over and screw him into the mattress with husky pants
from Brian in his ear.

Justin gives himself a small tug through his boxers, adjusts his cock so
it's a little less restrained in the tangled material as Brian lays slow,
lazy kisses against his lips.  It's unintended torture but Justin has
learned not to mind this part.  He cups the back of Brian's neck with his
other hand, quiet chimes in his head as he finally closes his eyes, tastes
minty freshness from already chewed gum across Brian's tongue.

"Daddy! Daddy! Justin and Daddy!"

Justin grins as Brian sighs softly into another kiss, easing back before
Brian can snatch another kiss.  He pushes Brian up until Brian rolls off of
him, giggling quietly as Brian cups his erection through his jeans to calm
himself.  Justin throws a pillow over his own crotch, still taking in deep
breaths to slow the racing hormones inside of him.  They both can hear the
loud footsteps against hardwood floor, more bellowing a telltale of Baylee
approaching through the hallway.

"What's up Bay?" Brian calls out, sitting up on the bed just as his son
stumbles into the bedroom.

Justin grins when he first catches a glimpse of long, golden curls,
effervescent blue eyes, cherry lips, and rosy cheeks.  Baylee's scampering
into the room toward the bed like a cat, jumping and climbing up until he's
in his father's arms, words loud and strung together from the first
syllable until the last.  Justin smirks at the way Brian listens intently,
following every wild gesture and exclamation without missing a beat.

"Justin, are you listening?!"

Justin's startled by the way Baylee's looking at him, smiling and nodding.
He hasn't pieced together a word the adolescent has said but just the pure,
untainted joy that surrounds Baylee overcomes Justin.  He tangles his
fingers through Baylee's curls, snickering at the way Baylee shrieks with
discontent.

A bashful smile dances over his lips when Baylee shimmies out of Brian's
lap and crawls on the bed until he's lying on his back next to Justin like
his father was earlier.  He recounts his story again – something
involving frogs, lemon bars, something little girl named Sarah, and
cartoons.  Justin pretends to understand it all, just like Brian, laying
back down and barely flinching when Baylee snuggles closer, eyes heavy and
words slowing.

Justin peeks up to watch Brian, the way the older man just watches them,
pride on his lips.  Justin grins back.  He's got fingers in Baylee's curls
again, soothing the boy.  He closes his own eyes, tries not to struggle
with his thoughts.  This kind of life isn't the screenplay he wrote for
himself years ago when trying to figure out where his future was headed.
He had no intentions of being in a relationship like this, being so
attached to a child that was not his own, feeling this close to happiness.

You can have the best of me like no tomorrow All I need is what you got to
get me high

He knows he's safer visiting Brian in Atlanta.

Brian had fallen out of the spotlight, without the other guys, a long time
ago.  There are very few paparazzi following Brian around the city, in the
parks, at the grocery store.  The fans were still there, far and few, but
it was nothing Justin feared when visiting Brian and Baylee.  They could
walk the streets; he could arrive in town to see Brian at any time of day
with just a little bit of fanfare at the airport.  He doesn't think even
the paparazzi that did notice Brian paid attention that Leighanne was no
longer around.  The Backstreet Boys were a turn of the century
attention-getter and, now, Brian was more than comfortable away from the
spotlight unless he was with Nick, Howie, and AJ.  Justin loved those
visits to Atlanta.

LA was a beast of another nature.

Brian didn't make as many frequent visits to the west coast as Justin did
to Georgia unless it tied in with a Backstreet Boys promotional event.  It
was harder for him to make an excuse to those invading his privacy why he'd
been in Los Angeles, without his wife or without the Boys.  His flights are
almost always late night ones and Brian's stopped letting Trace pick him up
because he's pretty much someone knows that's Justin Timberlake's best
friend picking up a Backstreet Boy from the airport.  Brian knows the
little girls who still camp around Justin's gated community wonder if it's
Brian Littrell driving by early mornings when he's headed back to the
airport but he's always wearing a hat, sunglasses on, sometimes a hood,
while slouching a little in the backseat of a car.

"Dude, I don't even know how you do it," Chris remarks from the entranceway
to Justin's kitchen.

Justin's busy clearing dishes from the dining room table while Trace and JC
are locked in a very competitive game of beer pong with Lance and his new
boyfriend, some guy named Michael that Justin truly likes but he knows the
other guys are always wary of anyone Lance dates.  Justin glances over his
shoulder to where Brian's still sitting at the table, smile glowing like
that faded California sun as he re-corks a wine bottle.

"Come on," JC growls as his ping pong bounces across the kitchen floor past
Justin's bare feet, Justin laughing lowly as JC takes a large gulp of his
beer from the red Solo cup.

"You suck at getting balls in the hole Jayce.  I don't know how you manage
to get guys to like you," Lance remarks, one arm slung around Michael's
shoulders as he easily toss his ping pong ball into a cup across from
Trace.  Trace is cursing lowly as he grabs the cup as Justin eases the
dishes into the sink.

"Don't start that shit," JC warns with a pointed finger as Trace chuckles
behind his cup.

"I don't mind," Brian finally responds to Chris statement, chewing the
inside of his mouth as Chris shrugs, shuffling into the kitchen.

"It takes some serious balls, being who you two are.  Hell, in this day and
age, I don't think I could do all the things I did when I was younger to
hide who I was from the world without wanting to lose my freaking mind on
someone daily," Lance notes, grinning when Michael rests his head on Lance
shoulder before taking his next toss, missing completely.  Lance giggles,
taking Michael's swallow of beer himself.  He turns his eyes back on Brian
before adding, "Not that I'm recommending you two come roaring out of the
closet or anything.  I mean, that would be crazy considering who Justin is
now.  And, of course, what it'd to for Baylee wouldn't be fair too."

"Justin's a nobody," Chris mutters, swirling around a glass of wine that
may or not be his but Justin's not going to comment as he begins washing
some of the dishes.

"Yes, well, he's a little higher up the totem pole than Mr. America's Best
Dance Crew therefore, obviously, him coming out because he's dating a
Backstreet Boy doesn't exactly scream career advancement," Lance states,
grinning as JC shoots him a lazy glare.  He doesn't hide his laughter when
JC misses another shot with his ping pong.

"You know if Joe was here," JC starts but Lance quickly holds up a hand.

"He'd agree with me about you," Lance insists, rollercoaster-high grin on
his lips as JC flips him off.  "And his daughters would probably ask you to
play dollies with them."

"You piece of shit."

"That's why we love our Lance Bass," Chris announces before slurping down
some more wine.

"I don't mind," Brian notes, rising him from his chair.  He's carrying the
bottle of wine back to the fridge, shrugging this time when JC and Lance
both give him a look of disbelief.  Justin watches him while cleaning a few
glasses, gnawing at his bottom lip.

"I call bullshit," Chris sputters out, snorting as he examines the last few
drops of wine in his glass.

Brian snickers while catching a flying ping pong as Trace poorly attempts a
shot at one of the Solo cups.  He hands it to Michael, spinning on his
heels to face Chris.  He slides his hands into his jeans' pockets before
adding, "I don't.  I don't mind the anonymity that comes with being back
home in Georgia but I also don't feel discouraged by the things I have to
do to see him out here.  I feel like that guy from those Bourne movies, a
special agent or something on a mission."

"You look like Matt Damon," JC and Lance say together, doubling over with
laughter when they look at each other.

"Dorks," Chris sighs, leaning onto one of the counters.  "And you're one
too Brian.  You should just walk around on the Ellen show with a pair of
underwear that says `This ass belongs to Justin Timberlake' and get it over
with."

"Sage words from the Hobbit," Brian teases, easing around Chris until he's
next to Justin.

"So says Frodo," Chris snorts.

Justin grins when he feels Brian laughing into his shoulder, washing a few
more dishes with Brian's hands on his hips.  He can't help the way it feels
to have Brian show affection in front of his friends.  It was an easier
adjustment for the group than it was when Lance started but maybe it was
because his friends genuinely liked Brian?  Maybe loved him?  He knows
Trace does even though Brian still gives him shit about smoking and the two
can never agree whether to watch Family Guy or the NBA but when it's just
he and Trace, his best friends confesses that Brian is the one thing about
Justin's life that Trace feels makes him better.

He knows Brian stands on his tip toes to press a quiet kiss to the corner
of his mouth when he turns around.  He smiles inwardly, drying his hands on
a towel as Brian eases away to put up the drying dishes.  He spies Trace
chugging down another cup of beer while Lance whispers in Michael's ear
from behind, sunburn redness speckling Michael's cheeks and Justin can only
imagine the things Lance is saying.  Chris and JC are caught up in a
conversation about how hot Justin's next co-star Olivia Wilde is and it
leads Justin to yank Brian by his belt loops the next time he passes by.

"You don't mind?" he asks as Brian gives him a startled expression.

Brian smirks, lets Justin trace a thumb over his lips.  "At first, sure.
Now?  You couldn't stop me from visiting you like this."

There are fireworks right in the pit of Justin's stomach, his bottom lip
smooth behind his teeth.  He takes in a deep breath because he's not going
to become some Julia Roberts romantic comedy and say something so
emotionally saturated he's nauseous about it later.  He lets silence bathe
them for a moment until Brian's face is molding into some crazy expression
and they're both laughing quietly, to themselves, with eyes on each other.

"You are no longer the King of Beer Pong young Trace," Lance jests proudly,
arm raised in victory as Trace misses another cup.

"Yeah, well, you're new play thing is no longer the King of Sobriety
either," Trace giggles out before chugging down another cup of beer.  He's
pointing toward Michael and even Justin can't help but watching the young
man struggling to support himself on the counter.

"Wasted," JC bellows, a hand thrown over his mouth when he hiccups out a
snicker.

"And this was your plan for a good night with friends?" Brian wonders with
a whisper, grinning against Justin's back.  He's snickering like a hyena
into Justin's shirt when Lance attempts to straighten his boyfriend against
the counter.

"You know, it could've been worse," Justin remarks, turning while drying
his hands with a dishcloth.  He presses a small kiss against Brian's
forehead, skirting his arms around the shorter man while Chris and Trace
dance around a dizzy Michael.  He sighs happily, resting his chin on the
top of Brian's head while Brian eases his arms around Justin to embrace him
back. "We could've invited Nick."

Brian groans into Justin's chest, playfully kneeing his groin and Justin's
laughing as he's shuffling away from Brian, hands over his crotch.  Justin
catches that wicked grin on Brian's lips as he's laughing while running out
of the kitchen, his head dizzy, his cheeks pained by the irremovable smile
on his lips.  He's caught before he makes it too far, doubling over with
laughter while trying to pry Brian's strong arms from around him.

Justin's pressed against the walkway into the kitchen, grinning goofily as
Brian edges on to his tip toes.  He knows what's next even though Brian's
fingers are tickling just beneath his ribcage and there's a loud raucous
from the kitchen.  He leans down into a small kiss from Brian, fingers
surfing through bright blonde hair.  He laughs with Brian through another
kiss, the sounds of a dribbling ping pong bouncing past their feet.
Justin's cupping Brian's chin, holding him still as he mouths a few more
kisses, deep and sensuous.  There's tongue, slow like honey, and Brian's
fingers have edge up until they're fastening into the fabric of Justin's
collar.

Brian's eyes are closed and he's breathing a little heavier.  Justin gets
some kind of fix from it, forgetting that this whole trip was nothing but
an inconvenience in the way of their lives.  He's tracing Brian's bottom
lip with his thumb, excited by the way those bright blue eyes are dipped
behind shadows.  When he leans forward, Brian's meeting him halfway with a
small smile, hand behind Justin's neck.  He fights Brian's pull when the
older man tries to drag him back into a lengthier kiss.  He nips at Brian's
bottom lip, laughing softly as Brian smiles through it all.

"Quit teasing me you freak," Brian whispers, lips close enough to taste.

Justin stays far enough back, avoids being caught in the web.  He's trying
not to succumb to the way his emotions are trying to stomp all over his
thought process.  He traces over the sharp features in Brian's cheek, over
the barely-there hairs that have yet to be shaven along Brian's jawline,
down to his chin.  He ignores Lance giving Michael a piggyback ride through
the halls, both squealing and nearly falling over.  He likes the way
Brian's eyes crinkle when he giggles under Justin's touch, caught in
reverie while Justin just analyzes, and tries to understand.

There's a muffled sound, his own voice, and Brian's pulling his phone from
his jeans' pocket.  There's shyness about the smaller man's movement as he
tries to clear the call and Justin can't help the way his brow is rising,
his eyes widening – You're all I ever wanted; you're all I ever needed,
yeah.

"You've got to be kidding me.  I was trying to find you two to tell you
about JC finding your stash of premium vodka but this?  You've got the kid
as your ringtone?" Chris is asking through laughter, holding up Justin's
phone as he looks on Brian and Justin.  "And old school JT at that."

Justin peers toward Chris before glancing at Brian, a flare of pinks and
reds freckling his cheeks.  He's slipping his phone back into his pockets
as Justin backs away, half-raised smile on his face.  He gives Brian a
light shove, snorting as Brian looks up in shock.

"Pretty lame B.  Kind of cute, but very lame," Justin states as Brian
shrugs, rubbing at his shoulder.  "Now shall we use Chris as a ping pong
for our match up against Michael and Lance?"

Brian's nodding, following Justin's lead as they move toward Chris.  Chris
is stumbling backward, eyes wide as he watches Brian and Justin.  Brian's
the first to sprint forward, wild howl leading him as Chris scrambles
backward into the kitchen.  Justin's grinning, following suit, letting all
apprehension about the feelings overcoming him take flight with his feet.

Let's touch the sky together baby Get you so high, it'll drive you crazy
Cause loving you is perfect And baby it's all worth it For us to explore
the impossible -- in the name of love

He loves hotel showers.  He's certain millions feel the same, but it's
something about that constant heat that takes him mind from everything
outside of the four walls he's behind.  Maybe it's different, otherworldly,
when Brian's there with him.  It's rare, probably only their third time
together, but it's euphoric.

The heat sinks into his skin, bullets of prickling hot water smacking his
muscles until they're completely relaxed.  Brian's in front of him,
directly under the strong spray of the showerhead, back to Justin.
Justin's fingers crawl over Brian's slick skin, digging into the muscles of
the smaller man's shoulders, over his chest, down the beautiful ridges of
his stomach.  He grins when Brian drags a hand through his own hair,
slicking his hair back as he opens his mouth to drink in some of the water.
Justin eases an arm around Brian, pulls him back into a small embrace as
his other hand brushes a few stray strands of Brian's hair into place.

"God, this is nice," Justin whispers into Brian's ear, taking a small nip
at the lobe.

Brian's spinning around in Justin's arm, spitting the water playfully into
Justin's face.  He's laughing while Justin's wiping his face, warped scowl
crumpling Justin's face.  Brian's leaning up, small kiss to the tip of
Justin's nose and they're both grinning, children in the heat of summer.
They're admiring each other for minutes from a distance, shyness never
their forte but it keeps them at bay.

When Brian's close enough, Justin reaches out, drags him the full distance.
He's laying ravenous kisses along Brian's neck, wrapped in the steam from
the shower.  Brian's angling his head, giving Justin's mouth more access,
more skin to map out with his lips and teeth.  He knows Brian loves the way
a tongue feels against his ear, shivers inside of Justin's strong embrace.

"Not trying to be subtle huh?" Brian wonders with a giggle, fingers combing
through Justin's wet brown hair.  Justin grins against his neck, gentler
kisses that are short but memorable.

"It's been awhile," Justin mutters, hands sliding against the slickness of
Brian's back.  They dip toward Brian's ass, do their best to get a strong
grasp.  Brian almost purrs into his ear and Justin's spurn on by the noise.

"Two weeks?"

"Sixteen days," Justin replies, nuzzling his chin along Brian's cheek as
Brian's smaller hands mold themselves down Justin's back, in between them
to graze over Justin's cock.  "Not that I'm counting."

"Not at all.  I don't know any guy who actually remembers how many days
it's been since he got his rocks off by anything other than his own hand,"
Brian declares with a laugh, thumb massaging the head of Justin's cock
until Justin's shaking and pulling back a little.

"And the thought hasn't crossed your mind?" Justin asks while pointing down
to Brian's bobbing cock.  He's grinning when Brian gives himself a slow
stroke, biting down on his lower lip nonchalantly.

"Three or four times a day," Brian replies softly, flicker of excitement in
those hypnotic blue eyes.

Justin's nodding, hand reaching forward until his fingers can encircle
Brian's wrist.  He tugs Brian to him, sunrise grin melting across his lips.
He pushes Brian's bangs back beneath the stream of the shower, fingers
tracing down those facial features again.  His other hand is edging over
muscles, arms, down Brian's chest, briefly over his scar.

"I keep forgetting how good you feel," Justin declares, his voice thick
with honesty.  He's keeping Brian close, smiling when Brian's fingers start
to trace over his chest, small touches before not-so-subtle grabs lead
Brian back to Justin's dick, sliding over the slick flesh without abandon.

"Nice," Brian whispers as Justin's hand works down the small of his back.
"Very nice."

Justin's kissing away deep groans when he finally starts massaging Brian's
cock, rough grip that keeps getting harder to keep under the spray of the
shower.  Brian's eyes are closed, face scrunched up but Justin knows the
smaller man is in heaven.  He's thumbing the slit, fingers dragging quickly
up and down the shaft.  He's got fingers in Brian's hair again, combing
through the dampness as he traces his tongue around Brian's open mouth.

"Good?" Justin whispers, lips still so close to Brian's.

Brian's smiling, eyes half-open.  Justin can still see the blueness, the
life, the joy that's rimming them.  He's smiling back when Brian replies,
"Good.  Real good."

Justin has Brian against one of the shower walls, hand still below Brian's
navel while his other hand holds Brian's head, slides past his ear and
along the line of his jaw to his chin as his mouth tastes every inch of
Brian's neck.  He's smiling before nipping, tongue tasting hot skin as the
water prickles off their skin.  He's licking as Brian's groans grow higher
in pitch, desperate as his fingers drag down Justin's back, his other hand
tickling the head of Justin's cock.

"Please. God, please," Brian gasps, head tilted back to give Justin more
access.

Justin moans, suckling Brian's neck until it's just that close to the
limits of a hickey.  He snickers when Brian's fingers feather through his
hair, pull on the short ends until Justin's lips are unfastening from the
older man's neck.  He plays with Brian's balls while staring into his eyes,
mouths ajar with heavy pants coming out.

"Just," Brian heaves out, strong grip on Justin's shoulder for support as
Justin rolls his balls in his larger hand.

"B," Justin smiles back, licking his swollen lips.  He watches Brian's
bottom lip tremble, considers pulling Brian into a strong embrace to calm
the shivers.  Lustful ache wins over and he starts dragging playfully on
Brian's erection.  "Gonna come?"

"Not yet," Brian stutters out, feeling the pulse through Justin's cock as
his hand slides down the definition of Justin's chest.

"Fuck.  Fuck, B, I need to real bad.  Need to shoot," Justin hisses,
staggering forward until his body is pressed against Brian's, cocks rubbing
together, lips on Brian's cheek, his ear.  "Want to come all over you."

Brian whimpers, hands scrambling over Justin's back.  He snickers softly
when Justin rolls his hips, thrusts hard just for the feeling.  He holds
Justin's hips, kisses along his shoulder.  He pushes Justin back, leads him
under the spray of the hot water, grinning while Justin stares at him
wide-eyed.  Just a small lick of his tongue across his lips and Brian knows
Justin can read his thoughts.

"I'll take care of you," he whispers and Justin's on the edge of nirvana
before anything happens.

Brian's on his knees somewhere between those whispered words and Justin
wiping the water from his face.  He's not tentative; not like the first few
times.  He tastes without inhibition, tongue curling around the head, lips
kissing along the crown.  He has his eyes closed, moving on instinct.  His
hands are on Justin's thighs for support, mouth opening to gradually take
Justin inside.

"Mmph, fuck." Justin hisses, tilts his head back down let the water wash
away his desperation.  He doesn't fight the way his hand immediately rests
on top of Brian's head, doesn't move it.

"Mmm," Brian groans, eyes batting open as water slicks down his face.  He
slides a hand to the shaft, holds it as he guides himself further down.  He
feels the head tickle the back of his throat, steadies his breathing while
loosening his jaw.  His eyes widen some, fights back tears, but he's proud
when the head settles in his throat.  He holds it there for a second,
swallowing.

"Brian, shit," Justin groans loudly, hand smacking against the shower wall.
He feels his toes curl against the floor's tiling, a shiver rippling from
his lower spine up to his ears.  He rub sat his chest, avoids grabbing the
back of Brian's head and keeping him there for hours.

Brian moans happily when he eases off, licking at his lips like a proud
animal.  He jerks Justin off while wiping the corners of his eyes, grinning
when Justin's whimpers become wetter.  He eases his other hand to his cock,
exhales hard when he gives it a light stroke.

"Come on," Justin whispers, watches Brian with squinted eyes.

Brian gladly moves forward again, takes Justin back in.  He's sucking is a
little sloppier, deprived off restraint.  He nurses on the head, welcomes
the tart flavor of Justin's pre-come.  He bobs up and down quickly, slurps
along the shaft before tonguing the head.

He was never like this with Leighanne, or any woman.  He was quiet,
patient, attentive, and gentleman-like.  He rarely let loose this side,
rarely dared to tiptoe over that edge.  But with Justin he was secure; he
was willing to embrace every thought without insecurity.

"That's it B," Justin hisses, hand finally on the back of Brian's head.
His other hand is on his cock, slapping it against Brian's tongue.  He's
grinning, biting down on his bottom lip when Brian suckles the head again.
"Fuck, you're good."

"Ah," Brian gasps, pulling back, jerking a little rougher on his own dick.
His knees ache, feet cramping but he's not easing up.  He knows Justin will
massage him later, ice down his entire body if he needed to just for this
moment.

Brian grips the back of Justin's thighs, jerking him forward.  He takes
Justin all the way down once more, swallowing a gag as he tastes that warm
pre-come again.  He pulls back, slurps around the head.  He's taking in
deep breaths, lapping at the almost purple head.  Justin's dragging fingers
through his hair, messing it but neither cares.

Justin shakes when Brian takes his balls into his mouth, one at a time
before trying to fit both in.  He giggles when Brian laps at them, toys
with Brian's ears for a moment before they're both looking at each other,
quiet smiles through their gazes.  Brian's gliding the tip back in, still
staring at Justin.  Justin chews on the corner of his bottom lip, hips
unconsciously aiding Brian further down the shaft.

"Damn B," Justin whispers, his voice deep and huskier than he could ever
remember it being.  The warm water against his back is easing the coiled up
tension in his body.  He knows Brian can feel the tightness of his stomach
as Brian's fingers ascend up his body.  His eyes flutter shut, head
rolling.  His breathing is accelerated and, right near the pit of his
stomach, he knows what it all means.

There are a few messy, wet kisses around the head of his cock.  He lets an
exhale rape the inside of his chest, fingering one of his own nipples.  He
pulls on it hard on the copper brown nipple, trying to do anything to make
this blowjob last longer than the three seconds he thinks it might've been.
But then there's a finger sliding just behind his balls, along that soft
skin and he nearly jumps onto his tiptoes when it plays along his hole.

"Brian," he almost shrieks, everything just above his stomach going liquid.
His skin is hot and Brian's suckling the head, jacking the shaft while
quietly easing a finger in and out of Justin.  And he lets it all happen
because, without thought, he trusts Brian.  He needs Brian.  And Brian is,
with or without this magical sexual feeling, the one person that he
pretends keeps him sane.  Almost happy.  Almost.

His cock is leaking, he can feel it every damn time Brian's finger slides
further in him.  Every nerve is throbbing and the way Brian's taunting him,
tongue trickling down the shaft and over the head like the water from the
shower head.  He's flushed and panting uncontrollably now, thoughts ramped
and all he wants is for Brian to keep sucking and keep fingering him.

They've done it – only twice.  Justin on his side, on his knees with
Brian inside of him and it took Justin months to gain the courage to let it
happen.  But he doesn't regret it, doesn't take back a second of the
soreness the next day and, fuck, he's glad he's not touring because dancing
after being fucked by a Backstreet Boy seems non-plausible.  But it's been
too long and all Justin can think about is letting Brian take him from
behind under the hot water from this hotel shower with his hands on the
walls, begging for more.

"Right there?" Brian wonders, fingers now, deep and twisting and hitting at
a spot that sets off fireworks just behind Justin's eyelids.  He's nodding,
sobbing a little and his muscles tighten everywhere, liquid spreading like
wildfire.  He tries to grab the wall for support but his hand slips and
Brian's pulling off the head.  He's jacking and working Justin's cock like
he's working his own.

"Fuck Just.  Motherfucker," Brian hisses, inching forward all while cumming
along the shower floor.  Justin's amazed at the multitasking but all that
falls away when Brian laps at the head of his cock for a few seconds,
anticipating.

"Yes," Justin hisses, fingers latched onto the small curls at the back of
Brian's blonde head.  He pulls him back; lets Brian jerk him off as he
comes helplessly across Brian's neck and chest.  There are long spurts,
dribbling ones, ones that make him whimper even more than he's intending.
His face scrunches, trying to hold the joyful pain back as Brian works the
sensitive cock, a few more streams squirting out and sliding down the
center of Brian's chest.  The water is quickly washing it all away but
Justin still catches remains of himself around Brian's neck.  He pants
heavily, dips his head back while pushing his auburn hair backward.

"That was nice, right?"

Justin's back to reality, Brian standing in front of him with a bar of soap
washing away the remnants of Justin's come.  Justin sighs happily, nods.
He dips his head down, gentle kisses honeyed over Brian's lips.  His hand
eases to the back of Brian's neck, even softer kisses pressed to the
smaller man's lips as he washes himself.

"Sixteen days' worth you say?" Brian wonders with a grin, his hand grazing
over Justin's still semi-hard cock.

Justin's grinning back, nipping at Brian's bottom lip.  He presses his
forehead to Brian's, dazed and nearly lost in every feeling prickling his
skin.  He's fighting the overwhelming feelings, dancing around them.  He
lets Brian play with his bottom lip, snorts quietly as Brian steps closer
until there's not an inch of breath between them.  He's toying with the
ideas in his head – happiness.  It's enough because anything more might
make him leave the shower and immerse himself into business and other
things he should be worrying about.

I can't explain the magic that we happen to obtain And now you know we got
that something that will make me say Like the perfect addiction baby I see
what I've been missing, yeah

Justin's not sure when he became submerged into Brian's life.  He can
remember every step he took to include Brian into his life; meeting his
friends, developing relationships with them, even meeting his mother and
stepfather.  He finds it humorous now because, even though his mother is
still widely protective of him, she asks more about Brian now than she does
her own son.  Trace never misses a chance to goof around with Brian and
Joey always brings his family to meet up with Brian and Baylee when they're
in Orlando.  He's let Brian develop his own relationships with everyone in
his life that matters and, without fear or conflict, has let those bonds
remain with or without his presence.

Brian's a little more private, determined in keeping his circle
impermeable.  Yet, Justin knows Brian's welcomed him in without much
thought.  He can genuinely feel that Baylee loves him.  He clings to Justin
like family, sometimes, like a father and Justin still hadn't figured out
if that's a responsibility he had intended to induct into his own life just
yet.  He knows Brian's security almost better than his own.

He hates to admit it but, after some time, he can even stand Nick.  He's
already thought about a Christmas present for Nick: a carton of cigarettes.
AJ and Howie have warmed to him or, more or less, warmed to the idea of one
of their own dating a man.  He sensed they never had a problem with him
before he was an integral part of Brian's life, back when he was just "that
brat from *NSYNC" and he can remember a few encounters with AJ outside of
the groups where there were actually a few friendly conversations.  He
hasn't had any interaction with Kevin yet but Brian assures him that his
cousin welcomes Justin "like he would a stray dog" and Justin's never sure
how to interpret that but Brian's always smiling after, head tilted and
those eyes read obnoxiously honest.

Brian was shier than Justin about creating introductions between Justin and
his mother.  Justin found it sweet, genuine and unnerving all at the same
time.  A chance trip to Atlanta when Brian's parents were already visiting
and Justin was somehow sitting in Brian's living room with Baylee in his
lap and Brian's mother, Jackie, watching him intently.  He doesn't know how
they managed to make it through most of the evening without discussing the
obvious and Jackie seemed more interested in Baylee than questioning her
son's interest in Justin but, by the end of the night, she was hugging
Justin and whispering, "I don't understand everything you younger
generations choose to do but I love my son and anyone who loves him half as
much as I do."

Its days like this where it's all too clear to him that, even if Brian
doesn't say it outwardly, he has a place in that impeachable circle Brian
has created.

He's only been in town for a few hours, same as Howie, but it's already
like being at home once again.  Howie's in Brian's backyard with Brian
trying to figure out the grill and it's a wonder to Justin how Brian's had
it for so many years and still can't seem to work it without the aid of his
father, brother or Kevin.  He's kept his own attention on Baylee
finger-painting at the kitchen table while Howie's toddler, James, waddles
around the kitchen, barely keeping his balance with glee.

"BBQ!" Baylee squeals, hands raised and Justin prays none of that red paint
splashes onto the walls as Baylee wiggles his fingers with excitement.
James is howling too though Justin is certain he knows not what Baylee's
shouting about.

"You sure you've got room in that tummy for more food?" Justin wonders with
a raised brow, carrying a damp dishtowel to wipe Baylee's fingers.

"Yep," Baylee chimes, grumbling a little as Justin cleans his hands.
"Mommy let me have a banana and a granola bar for breakfast.  I'm
starving."

Justin nods, nibbles on his bottom lip thoughtfully.  He has yet to speak
to her, see her since this all started.  Brian's cautious of that, keeps
things separate because she is nothing but Baylee's mother now.  It's not
that Brian's running around the world without her, still brings her from
time to time to keep things familiar and unsuspecting to the media but he's
clear about keeping separate hotel rooms and refrains from public
adoration.  Justin knows there's still resentment though Brian doesn't
often talk about it and, if his religious views permitted, divorce would've
happened three seconds after he found her cheating.  And it's all kinds of
ironic that Brian won't divorce the woman that cheated on him due to his
faith yet he'd engross himself in a relationship with a man.  Not that
Justin would argue with Brian about any of it because he was too content
knowing that Brian didn't love Leighanne anymore nor did he seek anything
but a partnership for their son.

He knows she still isn't completely aware of him; not like Jessica is aware
of Brian.  Brian doesn't speak of Justin to Leighanne though Baylee does,
but Baylee speaks of everyone to his mother.  He hopes she's still caught
up in her romance with he-who-Brian-wants-to-remain-nameless to piece
together that Baylee speaks of Justin like something greater than his Uncle
Nick, Howie, or AJ.  He hopes the entire world misses the way his cheeks
flush, his eyes light up, his smile gleams, and his speech warms at every
mention or the sound of Brian.

"Burger or hot dog Bay?" Brian asks from outside, jumping back when Howie
ignites the fire.  Justin snorts behind a hand, scrubbing his other hand
through Baylee's golden curls.

"Both!" Baylee cheers, mashing his fingers into some yellow and blue paint.
Justin's rolling his eyes before walking away.

"Just?"

Justin takes a quick look outside where Brian tying on an apron while
offering him a small smile.  Justin smirks back, dropping the dishtowel
onto the counter while dodging a waddling James.

"I just want you in one piece with no scorch marks," Justin requests.

"You should've placed an order for a raw Brian twenty minutes ago.  Fire's
on baby," Howie announces with an overzealous grin.  Brian's nose is
crinkling with laughter and Justin can't help the smile that falters over
his lips.

It's later, when Nick's stopped by and AJ's on the way with his fiancée for
some Atlanta-based Backstreet Boys powwow, that Justin feels even more at
home than he knew he could be.  Nick's been chasing Baylee and James around
the house for nearly an hour and Howie's drumming up song ideas on his
knees from the loveseat in the corner of Brian's living room.  Justin's
comfortable on one of the couches, slouching with his eyes everywhere
except for the man lying next to him.  He's trying hiding his grin the
moment Brian laid down on the couch, feet propped up on one of the arms
with his head in Justin's lap and his eyes on the ceiling.

"I hope Aje brings some dessert," Howie remarks, thumbing through his cell
phone.

"Something sweet for Sweet D," Nick teases, doubled over with his hands on
his knees and labored breaths.  "Damn kids are like the Energizer bunny."

"Quit smoking and you could keep up," Brian notes in a singsong voice,
turning his head slightly to look on the middle finger Nick is holding up.
He arches an eyebrow as his son comes dashing into the room, tugging on one
of Nick's arm with impatience.

Justin's been absentmindedly rubbing a hand along Brian's belly, on top of
the shirt but sometimes his fingers pet just a little too hard and Brian's
shirt rucks up, exposing skin that Justin traces along just like the fabric
of the shirt.  He listens to all the quips between Nick and Brian, the
meaningless anecdotes from Howie, the way they all avoid talking business
even though it creeps in and out of every statement they start.  His
fingers trace the soft hair just south of Brian's navel, still finds it
fascinating that when Baylee stops to ramble off something to his father
that he doesn't question why it's okay for his father to be touched by
another man instead of his mother?  But maybe there's things that Brian
tells Baylee in private, explains to his son that leaves just enough room
for understanding that Baylee doesn't question it in public.

Brian's slid a pillow over his crotch somewhere between a discussion about
basketball and the weather in California and Justin merely smirks.  His
fingers edge near the top of Brian's boxers occasionally, dip just shallow
enough that the rough hair down there tickles the pads of his fingers.  He
doesn't know when he himself got hard but when Brian nudges against it and
makes a small gasp, none of his friends notice.  But there's a broad grin
on Brian's lips and Justin's chewing his bottom lip, cheeks flamed with
blush.

His free hand is combing through Brian's hair when AJ and Rochelle.  He
offers polite greetings but doesn't do much in the way of moving when Brian
remains still in his lap.  There's a look from AJ that Justin considers
interpreting but then Rochelle's chatting with him like they've been
friends for years, like this `thing' he and Brian share is okay on a normal
level.

"All right guys, Boys meeting in the kitchen.  Let's not let this trip to
Atlanta be a total bust," AJ announces after a while, dragging Nick by the
arm before he can initiate another game of hide-and-seek with Baylee and
James.  Howie's rolling his eyes with a sigh, excusing himself from his
phone call with his wife to follow suit.  Brian's pressing a quick kiss to
the corner of Justin's mouth before ducking out of the room.

"Oh Just, can you keep an eye on James while we talk?" Howie requests
softly as Baylee and James come tumbling back into the room.

Justin's nodding, trying to camouflage anxiety but overwhelmed with relief
that Howie has invested that kind of trust in him.  He knows the level of
protectiveness Howie has with his only son and it dares to rival Brian's
protection of his family and friendships.  He's scooping the toddler up
when he comes sleepily stumbling through the living room.  He grins because
James doesn't cry, doesn't fuss and it's probably because Baylee's right
there next to Justin, chatting wildly away at Rochelle.

"It's nice, isn't it?" Rochelle wonders with a grin.

Justin adjusts James in his arms, gives her a curious glance.  His question
doesn't make it past his lips before she's giggling, crossing her legs
while Baylee snuggles up to Justin, yawning quietly.

"Getting past that part where they stop acting like they hate you and start
acting like you're part of the team," Rochelle remarks, cooing at the way
James yawns quietly.  "I know the feeling.  It felt like AJ was telling me
forever that everyone genuinely liked me but I still thought they'd rather
I not be around.  But then Brian left me alone with Baylee one day, then
Nick actually sat and talked to me with no one else around, and it felt
like it wasn't just bullshit.  I'm not going to lie, it made me happy."

Justin's nodding, snorting.  It did feel that way, especially after those
first few times being around any of the other guys besides Nick.  And maybe
he thought it'd be a little easier because he was Justin Timberlake, that
little guy they knew from *NSYNC for so long.  But it wasn't and now he was
holding James while Baylee slept under his arm.

He was relieved.  He was one of them.  He was, somewhat, happy.

You can have the best of me like no tomorrow All I need is what you got to
get me high

Its overwhelming how quiet and Zen his house can be when Brian's there.  It
shouldn't be, not by any means.  Not but a couple of hours before were he,
Trace, Brian, and Baylee making a crime scene of the kitchen trying to cook
pasta while his mother and bodyguards looked on.  The clanging of the pots
while Trace and Baylee argued over whether to add salt or sugar to the
sauce was enough but then Brian's poor attempt at making garlic bread while
Justin nearly lost a finger slicing tomatoes echoed off the walls.  There
was laughter when Trace nearly burned his hand draining the pasta and
Baylee couldn't stop giggling when Brian smeared sauce across Justin's
cheek.  Lynn had to cover her eyes several times when Baylee kept adding
Parmesan to the pasta when no one was paying attention, opting to pop the
cork on a bottle of wine to sooth her nerves.

But then Lynn was bonding with Baylee over making salad and Justin was
standing over Brian, hands guiding Brian's own as he tossed the pasta in
the sauce.  Justin was kissing the top of Brian's head as Trace was slicing
the bread, grinning into Brian's golden locks when Trace scooped Baylee up
to take a whiff of the finished product.  And when Baylee was falling
asleep in Lynn's lap and Trace was half-drunk on the couch from the wine,
Brian and Justin snuck away.

"Food and sex is a pretty neat combo," Brian says, taking a large bite out
of a Twizzler with Justin underneath him.

Justin stretches on his bed, lets the soft sheets beneath wrinkle up some
more as he edges his fingers down Brian's naked back.  He chews the corner
of his bottom lip, entranced in the way Brian's skin is golden from hours
of being in the California sun.  He grins when Brian offers him the tip of
a Twizzler, sucking a healthy portion of it into his mouth before biting.

"Weren't not having sex B.  This is called lying naked," Justin remarks,
mind drifting for a moment when Brian's leg brush gently against his own.
He smiles at the ceiling, thumb tracing over Brian's shoulder while his
other hand dips beneath the sheet Brian's tangled in to caress his ass.
"But technically it would be `sex and candy is a pretty neat combo.'"

Brian hums out the words to the Marcy Playground song before pressing a
swift peck to Justin's lips.  "It's a good thing this relationship isn't
based on technicalities."

"Mm, that it's not," Justin replies with a Cheshire grin, legs spreading so
that Brian can ease between them.  He inches his fingers down the middle of
Brian's back, lazy movements as Brian eases his fingers over Justin's
buzzed head.

"I hope the reshoots for this movie are over soon.  I miss the hair," Brian
states, taking another bite of Twizzler when Justin twists his mouth
sideways at him.

"You just want something to grab onto when I'm giving you a blowjob,"
Justin teases, sneaking a bite off the Twizzler Brian pulls fresh from the
bag.  He chews it with a large grin when Brian bugs his eyes out.

"That's what your ears are for silly," Brian jokes, pulling at Justin's
lobe while ripping off another end of a Twizzler.  "Though you're pretty
good without me telling you what to do."

Justin snickers, freckled blush peppering his cheeks in red tint.  He feels
Brian's fingers easing down his chest like hot caramel on ice cream.  He
sighs contently, feels the slightest nudge just between his legs and he
knows its Brian's erection.  His own is pressed between their stomachs, his
body naturally wanting to grind upward for some friction.

"I bet you think compliments like that are going to get me to go down on
you right now," Justin whispers as Brian's edging downward for a kiss.  He
darts forward to steal one before Brian can reply, lingering to taste
Brian's lips and candied strawberries.

Brian's trying hard to fight the smile pulling at his cheeks but Justin's
still there, soft, quick kisses that keep Brian still.  There are a few
kisses with tongue, ones that Brian hungers for most.  He's sucking
Justin's tongue, dropping away the bag of Twizzlers to hold Justin's face.
He keeps his eyes open for a moment, watching the way Justin's smiling
through the kisses.  He giggles, bites down on Justin's bottom lip.

Justin threads his fingers through Brian's hair, feels the soft texture of
the blonde strands and follows them to the end where they're starting to
curl.  He tilts his head, lets his eyes drift shut as Brian takes the lead
with the next few kisses, sucking Justin's tongue and moving nimble fingers
over Justin's skin.  They're both easing the sheets from their bodies, cool
air from the air conditioner drenching their skin as hands roam.

"Don't want head Just," Brian whispers against Justin's lips, devilish grin
on his lips as he eases Justin's legs further apart with his hands and then
push them up a little.  He mouths a few more quick kisses to Justin's ruddy
lips.  He catches a hint of nervousness mist through Justin's eyes as his
fingers smooth down to Justin's hole, slightest pressure with his index
finger.

Justin licks his lips, lets Brian settle further between his legs.  His
nerves are fighting ecstasy as Brian pushes just enough to gain entrance
with his forefinger, blanks out for a second as his eyes roll to the back
of his head and he welcomes Brian.

"If you want to," Brian whispers into Justin's ear and he can't help the
need to give himself a few quick pulls on his throbbing cock.

Justin whimpers, biting down hard on his bottom lip as Brian eases his
finger in and out completely, adjusting each time.  His toes curl and he
has to latch his mouth and teeth onto Brian's neck to calm his racing mind.
He grins at the groan that rumbles through Brian, sucking just enough to
break Brian's concentration.  He pulls away before a bruise can form,
shivering when he feels two wet fingers inserted into his hole.

"Easy.  Easy man," Brian says quietly, his voice tranquil and patient as
Justin tenses up some.

"Brian," Justin gasps, groans softly as he pulls at the sheets.  He spreads
his legs even further, holds onto the back of Brian's head as the older man
licks kisses down the side of Justin's neck.  He feels the tingling from
his toes up to his ears as Brian adds a third finger, doesn't fully wait
for Justin to adjust this time before moving them around.

"You can take it," Brian says through kisses, eases back from Justin's
collarbone to move to his mouth.  He's smiling when he catches Justin's
eyes rolling back again, tries to guide the kisses as Justin grunts.

"Shit," Justin hisses, pushes back onto the fingers each time they try to
retract.  He bites back a moan as Brian jacks him off, tries to comprehend
when Brian licked saliva in his hand before applying it back to Justin's
cock, the slapping of slick flesh louder than Brian's own words.

"You're tight."

"Fuck," Justin whimpers, eyes finally open.  He drags Brian down, kisses
him harder and harder as Brian fucks his fingers into Justin with more
persistence.  His panting is quicker, wetter.  "God I want you."

"Condom?" Brian wonders in between kisses, letting Justin's tongue lick at
his teeth.

"Just fuck me.  Just fuck me B, please," Justin pleads through heavy
exhales.  He's pulling at Brian's arms, scrambling fingers down his back.
He's thinking with some sort of clarity.  He trusts Brian to a dangerous
level, knows the other man won't do too much, won't hurt him.  It's not all
lust though Justin knows it's somewhere toeing the edge.

He feels Brian's slick cock moving, riding the crack of his ass for a few
minutes as they kiss.  It's passionate and unrequited.  Justin's fighting
the sobs bubbling in his throat, letting Brian slap his cock against
Justin's hole as Justin stretches and finds a comfortable position.
Brian's putting a pillow under his ass and he's lost track of the world
until Brian starts lining himself up against Justin.

"You can do this?" Brian wonders, lips just a breath away from Justin's.
There's silence and then Brian's kissing him, comforting him.  Brian's
voice is assured and confident when he whispers, "you can do this.  You can
do it."

Brian's face is buried in Justin's neck when he finally eases into Justin.
It hasn't been too long, maybe a month, but enough time that Justin almost
forgets what it's like to be this full.  He's got a large hand on Brian's
ass, doesn't let the smaller man move slow.  He need it now, needs it
quick.

Brian's whispering his name into his neck, Justin staring at the ceiling as
Brian stays buried to the hilt in him.  Justin's hand eases up from Brian's
ass, up that broad back and over shoulder blades.  He feels Brian gasping
into his neck, bites down on his own bottom lip because if he yells he'll
wake everyone.

"Oh God," Justin hisses when Brian finally begins to move.  He feels
everything below his navel stretch and constricts as Brian pulls all the
way out and then eases back in.

"Feels so good," Brian whimpers, slow thrusts.  He kisses along Justin's
cheek, feels the prickle of a goatee against his lips.  "So fucking good.
Tight."

"Come on," Justin heaves out, legs lifting into the air to give Brian a
better position.  He holds Brian close to him as Brian starts to rolls his
hips, fuck him with short, slow jabs.  He slips a hand back to Brian's ass,
feels the muscle tighten as Brian works harder.

"Fuck Justin," Brian grunts, eyes squeezed shut as he begins to thrust
faster.

"Ah."

Brian sucks on Justin's earlobe, stays as close as possible as his cock
reaches deeper into Justin.  He eases his arms under and behind Justin to
grasp onto his shoulders, swifter jabs as he holds the squirming Justin
still.  He smiles as Justin groans quietly into his ear, pleads with him
for more.  He feels his own toes curl as Justin grips him unintentionally,
curses low and deep.

"Don't stop.  Oh damn, I can't... just don't stop B," Justin moans, fingers
spreading against the sheets.  He's overcome by the way it feels with Brian
inside of him, catalogues it because he wants it over and over now.  He
wants this nightly, whenever they're around each other and its ecstasy
mixed with illegal drugs in his head.

"Justin."

Justin nods, tangles his fingers in the sheets as Brian eases off of him.
He watches Brian grab his ankles for leverage and slowly nibbles his lower
lip as Brian twists his cock inside of Justin.  There are shallow, gradual
thrusts that Justin accustoms his body to before Brian's slamming into
Justin, quiet trust in those light blue eyes.  Justin latches onto it,
ignores the way Brian's hitting spots in him so rapidly he can't calculate
how it's making his body feel.

Justin trickles his hand down his belly, through the kinky brown hair to
his cock, surprised at how hard it is.  He pulls at a nipple, small gasps
peeking through his lips while watching Brian.  There's sweat along Brian's
brow as he pounds into Justin for a few minutes, lust rimming though once
bright blue eyes.  He's keening and Justin knows that feeling, has felt it
once too many while inside of Brian.

"Gonna come B?"

Brian nods briskly, slows down some.  He fucks just the head into Justin,
shakes at the way Justin's body is pulling on him.  He's in love with the
heat, the tightness of Justin's hole.  It's better than the pussies he's
fucked dozens of times.  It's different and verbally indescribable.  He
remains still for a moment as Justin pushes back, fucks himself onto
Brian's cock.

"So big, thick," Justin hisses, rolling his hips to feel Brian in every
corner inside of himself.

Brian lies back down, pushes up just enough that his chest his hovering
over Justin's body.  He grinds into Justin, fucks with little focus now.
He giggles when Justin presses playfully kisses to his open mouth.

"You feel so fucking good B," Justin whispers, playful and honest all at
once.  "Fuck me.  Fuck me `til I bust."

Brian nods, pounds Justin harder.  The beds shaking and Justin knows the
sheets are soaked with sweat.  He can smell the heady scent of sex in the
air and he knows he'll have to light candles later to rid the smell but the
aroma is enticing to him right now.  It's egging him on, eyes closing as he
starts to jerk his cock furiously.

"More," Justin whimpers, back arching.

"Can't hold out," Brian gasps, body moving raggedly.  "Gonna fucking come."

"Me too," Justin sobs, feet planted against the bed to roll his body onto
Brian's cock.  "Come inside."

Brian whines into Justin's ear, collapsing as he fucks Justin.  His lasts
few thrusts are deep, fingers on Justin's hips as he pulls him down onto
his cock.  He watches Justin come, thick spurts dribbling down Justin's
fingers before a few more squirts stream out and up Justin's chest.  Brian
grins, shaking through his own orgasm as Justin keeps cumming, keeps
shooting clear liquid over his stomach.

"Ah.  Ah, ah," Brian gasps, kissing Justin's cheek as he pushes all the way
into Justin.  He lets his cock soften inside of Justin, stays within the
heat as if the world is a glacier outside of the bed.  He nuzzles his nose
to Justin's ear, listens to the quiet whimpers beneath him.

"You're incredible Brian," Justin moans, throat dry and body fiery.  He
lets his muscles loosen, body sticking to Brian's.  He's dizzy with
happiness, snorts when Brian mumbles something into his neck.  He welcomes
a kiss from Brian, lingers in it to taste the sweetness of Brian's tongue.

"I love you Just."

Justin smiles, traces fingers down Brian's face.  He tiptoes them along
Brian's jawline, studies quiet blue eyes, soft pink lips.  He secures his
teeth to his bottom lip and fights with the overwhelming feeling again.
It's scratching at his brain, stinging against his heart.  His life has
never been this controlled and still chaotic.  It's never been this close
to what he's hiding from.

But there's velvet joy in Brian's eyes as he's looking on Justin and the
words just come: "I love you too B."

There it is: Bliss.  It's palpable, wanted, and he's letting his defenses
down.  He's rolling around in the bed with Brian, laughing, giggling, and
touching.  They're kissing and trying to be quiet because they're still
naked and Baylee scrambling in at this moment wouldn't be right.  He's
kissing along Brian's cheek, letting Brian paint his chest with sweaty
palms.  He pulls Brian close, lets Brian rest his head on his shoulder and
eyes slip close.

Justin lets his breathing slow while holding Brian.  He presses a small
kiss to Brian's forehead and bliss wraps itself around him and he loves
every moment of it.

So let's touch the sky together baby
Get you so high, I'll drive you crazy
Cause loving you is perfect
And baby it's all worth it
For us to explore the impossible -- in the name of love

-	"In the Name Of Love" by Chris Richardson