Date: Fri, 01 Jun 2001 19:43:23 +0000
From: Angel1313@att.net
Subject: Devotion ch.42

Devotion
Chapter Forty-Two:
"Exposed"

author: Angel

e-mail (for feedback! ^_____^ ): Angel1313@att.net

Disclaimer: Sadly, this is just fiction

Notes: It's been a while, I know, but I'm back! I'm totally into *NSYNC
again, and I just had my last final today! That's right, I'm going on
summer vacation! That means I'll have a lot more time to write, so
"Devotion" will be back (hopefully) in heavy rotation on Nifty. I hope
you'll enjoy it! Feel free to send me feedback (I love it) and enjoy this
chapter. You may want to re-read ch.41, though. It's *really* been a while
(March?!). Thanks, Angel ^_^

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter Forty-Two:
"Exposed"

	"What was I doing?" JC lamented, pacing his hotel room. "I
shouldn't have called him `baby.' I shouldn't have sat next to him. I
shouldn't have let my control slip."
	Dropping onto his bed heavily, the brunet sighed. "I shouldn't have
run out of there." Taking a deep breath, he laid back onto the bed and
closed his eyes. He didn't even realize that he was drifting off to sleep
until he was too far gone.

	Knock! Knock! Knock!
	"JC! Open up, damn it!"
	JC rolled over and nearly fell off the bed. "I'm coming!" he yelled
grumpily, trudging over to the door. "What?" he snapped, opening it at
last.
	"I've been trying to get in for the past fifteen minutes," Lance
returned, equally pissed off. "We're probably going to be late because of
you!"
	"What else is new?" Joey asked from down the hall, chipper as
always.
	JC glared at him. "Whatever," he muttered, returning inside to grab
his wallet. Glancing quickly in the mirror, he sighed. "I look like shit."
	At this, Lance smiled. "Well, yes, but I could of told you that. No
need to waste time looking in the mirror." Turning back into the hallway,
he added, "No time to fix your hair now. You can do it in the car."
	JC nodded, grabbing a comb with his room key. He then followed
Lance into the hall, shutting the door behind him. He then walked with
Lance and Joey to the elevator. "Where are Chris and Justin?"
	Lance inwardly breathed a sigh of relief as they entered the
elevator. At least JC had asked about Justin. He had been known to pretend
the younger man didn't exist when they were fighting. "They're waiting
downstairs."
	"Where are we going, anyway?" Joey spoke up.
	Lance sighed. "You never listen, do you? I just told you ten
minutes ago!"
	"Bad memory," Joey explained. "Can't be helped."
	Lance smacked him playfully. "Yeah *right,* Joseph. But I'll tell
you anyway, for JC's sake. We're going down to the recording studio to
first learn the song en Espanol and then record it."
	"We're doing a studio version?" JC asked, genuinely surprised.
	Lance nodded. "Yep, so we really have to pay attention to our
instructor."
	"Do you know who our instructor is yet?" Joey asked.
	"Yes," Lance replied, stepping out of the elevator. "Well, sort
of. His name is Alex Macandulce, and he's fluent in Spanish, English, and
Portuguese. I also know that he's 23 years old, but beyond that, we'll just
have to wait and see."
	"Maybe you'll be in luck and he'll be a major hottie," Joey teased
JC, elbowing his bandmate in his ribs.
	JC glared at him but said nothing.
	Lance began to walk faster, hoping to avoid a confrontation. "Well,
here are Chris and Justin. Guys!" he called out, getting his bandmates'
attention. "Let's go!" The five of them then made their way out the back of
the hotel into a waiting limo.
	They were in such a rush to get into the limo that no one bothered
to be picky about the seating arrangement. JC and Justin didn't realize
they were sitting next to each other until it was too late to do anything
about it.
	JC looked at Justin and found the younger man looking back. Justin
had an amused look on his face. Frowning, JC looked away. Justin began to
laugh.
	Lance watched in nervous anticipation, praying that his bandmates
would somehow get along. He only became more nervous as JC closed his eyes
and clenched his teeth.
	"Oh, Josh," Justin giggled. "Please let me fix your hair before you
step out in public again."
	Lance's eyes widened. Chris looked over at the Mississippian
nervously. Joey smiled.
	"You really should let him do it, Jace," Joey said
good-naturedly. "You have a bad case of bed-head."
	JC opened his eyes, a small smile playing upon his lips. "Sure, why
not? I brought a comb, but I don't have a mirror, so it wouldn't make any
sense for me to do it, anyway." With that he got the comb out of his pocket
and handed it to Justin.
	Justin grinned widely, turning to face the other man. "Thanks so
much, Josh," he said happily, causing JC to laugh.
	"You're the one who's helping me. I don't see why you're so
excited."
	Justin began to work on the older man's hair as he answered, "I've
never liked my hair, Josh, you know that. Your hair is so much nicer. It's
so silky and smooth. I've wanted hair like yours all my life!"
	"I like your hair just the way it is," JC said softy, gazing at
Justin's deep blue eyes, focused on the older man's hair. "You're perfect."
	For an instant, Justin's face lost its smile, but it was just as
quickly pasted back on. Lance, Chris, and Joey didn't notice the change,
watching intently though they were, but JC could tell that it was
different. Justin's eyes had lost their sparkle, his face the warm glow.
	"Just?" he asked quietly, almost hesitantly. "Are you all right?"
	Focusing on his bandmate's hair, though it needed no more
attention, the young man replied, "Of course, why wouldn't I be?"
	JC sighed, reaching up and placing his hands over his
bandmates'. Gently, he pulled their hands down to his lap. Justin downcast
his eyes, focusing on their interlocked fingers.
	"Justin, what's wrong? If this is about earlier, we can talk about
it. Just not right now. Later. In private," JC whispered, leaning down to
try to catch the younger man's eye.
	Justin remained focused on their hands for another few moments in
silence. Finally, the young man looked up. JC was startled to find out that
Justin's clear blue eyes were swimming with tears.
	"If I'm so perfect," the blonde began hoarsely. Looking up to meet
JC's concerned gaze, he asked, "then why don't you want to be with me?"
	It was JC's turn to look away. He opened his mouth to say something
but closed it again when he realized that he didn't have an answer. Turning
back to the younger man, he said simply, "Justin, I'm sorry." It was all he
could think to say.
	Justin smiled sadly. "What for? I understand. I wouldn't want to be
with me, either."
	"Hey," JC protested softly, lifting Justin's head to meet his gaze
when the younger man once again looked away. "Hey. Where is this coming
from? Where's the confident young pop star we all know and love?"
	Justin closed his eyes, trying to shut JC's caring face from his
mind. "How confident can you be when the one person who means the most to
you keeps rejecting you?" Looking up once more, Justin met his bandmate's
eyes. "Even a pop star begins to question his worth if his best friend
can't stand being around him. Especially if all he did was tell that friend
that he loves him."
	"Justin," JC began, but Justin cut him off.
	"Here's you comb," he said, handing it to the brunet.
	JC sighed heavily and looked down at the comb. "Thanks," he
muttered, knowing that he wasn't going to be able to speak with the younger
man. Justin had already turned away.
	The group lapsed into a heavy silence. Lance closed his eyes in
frustration, knowing that they would never be able to get the song down
with JC and Justin fighting. They would be off, and that would be enough to
mess everyone up.
	/I've tried fixing things,/ Lance thought bitterly. /This time
they're on their own./
	Joey, sensing the tension in the younger man, reached out and put
his arm around Lance's shoulders.
	Sighing, Lance relaxed a little and leaned his head against Joey's
shoulder. Joey, in turn, laid his head on Lance's.
	Chris smiled. /At least *one* of the couples is getting along,/ he
thought, shaking his head at JC and Justin. JC was staring at his comb and
Justin was gazing out the window absently.
	Chris sighed. It was going to be a long night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well, what did you think? It's been a while, so I would really like to hear
your thoughts on this chapter. If you'd like to tell me where you think I
should take the story, feel free. I think I know how I'm going to end it
(gasp! "devotion" *does* have an end in sight!), but I've got plenty of
time before I get there. Things should be getting better... they've got a
lot to work through, but don't worry! Remember that I believe in happy
endings and you'll be much comforted... Unless, of course, you realize that
I'm probably going to write a sequel and the happy ending might come then
^_~ Yeah, I'm cruel, but at least I know it. Anyway, I'm going to start
ch.43 right away! And thanks always for reading! -Angel ^_^