Date: Tue, 1 Aug 2000 09:09:54 -0700 (PDT)
From: Darren LeVanelle <levanelle@yahoo.com>
Subject: Everything I Said 7 (Anniversary Edition)
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Hey everybody! A combination header on this one since this is a
special occasion. With Chapter 7 I am celebrating one whole week of
continuous stories on this series! HOORAY!!! So with that in mind I'd
like to give a few shouts out to some people.
To Chris: I owe you the utmost thanks because if it wasn't for
your story on Nifty I never would have gelled together these ideas and
make this story come alive! (His story is 'I Need Love' for those of
you who are wondering what it is and trust me, a really good read.)
To JM: You are still my utmost inspiration to write good stories.
From you I have learned to write about the characters and the story,
and not just sex. (Imagine that!) Sorry about your disastrous
retirement but, what can I say? You just can't keep a good fag down!
To David: The Nifty 'Crew' is so often overlooked but thanks for
being cool and getting this stuff up and posted all the time. I think
a lot of the authors take for granted that you do a lot of thankless
work for them and sometimes it's overlooked. Not by me. Thank you.
To All My Fans: Well, the ones who have e-mailed me or chatted.
Thank you for your praises and enthusiasm. That is the support that
makes me want to try and keep this series as 'Daily' as possible. You
are the backbone of my faith in this series, and my faith in my
writing. I appreciate it all VERY MUCH!!!
Anyways...onto the boring legal stuff.
This is a work of fiction. I am in no way implying or stating
anything about the real life sexuality of the member of 'N Sync. This
story involves homosexuality, and male/male romance. If this type of
material offends you please leave now. Also if you are under the age
of 18, or this type of material is illegal in your state or country,
please leave too. You can check out my SlashPage at:
http://www.agelfire.com/celeb/DLeVanelle/index.html
Or e-mail me with your thoughts and opinions at:
levanelle@yahoo.com
Or you can try and catch me online through AIM. My name is
DLeVanelle. I'm always up to chatting with my fans. Hope you enjoy
the rest of the series as it continues to develop. Later! And
Godspeed.
-Darren
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EVERYTHING I SAID
- Chapter 7 -
Written by Darren LeVanelle
I awoke to the sensation of a pair of arms wrapped around me. I
turned my head to the side and saw Lance's cute little face smiling at
me.
"Good morning handsome!" he exclaimed before leaning towards me
and placing a small friendly kiss on my forehead. It was a sweet
gesture. One that I didn't mind. "Sorry but I fell asleep after
Justin and I finished talking. I was still pretty tired."
Oh shit! I felt a knot in my stomach as I recalled my thoughts
from last night. I got jealous cause I thought him and Justin were
gonna make it last night. Stupid me. But I was also relieved when I
came to the conclusion that it didn't matter and that my convictions as
a moral person were still intact. "It's alright. I promised I'd be
back and I keep my word." I returned the kiss on his forehead also and
saw a warm smile cross his face. Hmm. I wanted to ask if he 'liked'
me like that. But, not one to intrude, so I just let my thoughts
slide.
"What time is it?"
"It's about 7 right now. But there's no hurry to get out of
bed." Ok. Another hint about him liking me. Hmm. He hugged on me a
little tighter, his hands practically attached to my body. "I'm much
more comfortable here." I bet Lance. From the poking sensation I
again felt on the side of my lower torso, I knew he was pretty
'comfortable'. Time for my playful side to come out.
"Yeah you seem pretty comfortable to me. That and a little
excited too." I flashed him a wicked grin and awaited his reaction.
True to form, Lance noticed his stiff member poking into my side and
turned about 3 different shades of red. If I hadn't seen it with my
own eyes I would have never believed the human body is capable of
showing that much embarrassment. I leaned into him, wrapping my arms
around him, and gave him a reassuring hug. "It's alright. We all get
morning wood sometimes y'know?" He eased up a little at that point in
time, not acting as shameful as before. Lance then noticed why I said
that.
"Oh my." He gasped out, looking down at the protrusion in my
boxers. I quickly covered up with the blanket and looked over at him.
He was STILL staring down at my crotch.
"Earth to Lance. Come in please?" I said while waving my hand in
front of his face. He finally stopped glaring down at me and looked
back up. "Don't stare too much boy."
"Boy? Who you callin' a boy?" His southern accent came to the
fore as he spoke to me. I couldn't help but giggle a bit at him.
"I'll have you know that I AM older than you."
"Not by much." I responded to him. "Don't you think we should
get up soon? I'm kind of starved." I could hear my stomach rumbling
which is never a good sign.
"But it's SO comfy here." I shot him a disapproving look and he
finally relented. "All right. I guess I'm kina hungry mahself." He
started to grab a shirt and a pair of sweats to put on. I decided it
was now or never to ask about last night.
"So what was that whole thing with Justin all about?" He looked
over at me with a cringe in his features. "I don't want to intrude or
anything. I was just wondering what's up." He let out a sigh before
responding.
"Well after you got up to go to the bathroom and stuff he
wandered over here and woke me up. He just finished saying that he was
sorry for how rude he acted towards me earlier and then gave me a hug
when you walked in." Ok. Now it was starting to make sense. "He was
just telling me that he really didn't think of me any differently. It
was just a huge shock and that he needed the time to figure it all out
in his head on his own. Then he proceeded to say how it would be kinda
difficult for him the next few days but for me not to worry. He said
he'd eventually come around." Well that sounded a little funny to me.
But I've seen how far off I can be when listening to my overactive
imagination. So I decided not to let it run wild.
"Ok. It's your business and all but I just wanted to see if
everything was all right." After he had pulled his shirt on and put on
a pair of sweats I added in. "I'm only looking out for you."
"I know. It's very sweet and I like it!" With that he leaned
into me quickly and pressed his lips against mine. I let him linger
there for a little bit, hoping he would catch what he was doing. He
did, thankfully, cause I would have hated to have to push him away.
But he did surprise me in a very sweet way. Never has a guy been that
forward. "Oh lord. I'm...I'm sorry Jeremy." He pulled away and
turned his head, acting very shameful. Again he shocked me with his
actions. This could be a difficult scenario. How to let him down easy
without hurting.
"It's ok Lance. You don't have to apologize." I gave him a
squeeze on his shoulder to let him know all was ok. He took it pretty
quickly and hopped out of the bed.
"C'mon. Let's go get some breakfast." He let the smile widen on
his face. I couldn't argue with that kind of enthusiasm. I hopped off
the bed myself, quickly pulled my shirt on and pants and walked down
the hallway in my socks.
We emerged into the room affectionately called the 'Game Room' to
grab something to eat. Surprisingly, Justin was already up and about.
He must have already had his 'morning cereal' cause he had a smile on
his face and greeted us promptly looking up from his computer.
"Good morning Lance. Good morning Jeremy." Damn. Did he just
do a 180 and turn from the smug bitch into Mr. Nice in like 8 hours or
am I still dreaming? "Hope you two slept well last night. Those bunks
aren't made for two y'know." Y'know, I hear the word y'know way too
many times in one day from these guys, y'know? And, y'know, it can be
downright irritating, y'know? Don't you just HATE it when authors,
y'know, have their characters say the same thing, y'know, over and over
and over again? Y'know what I mean? Y'know. C'mon, I know y'all know
what I'm talking about here. Repetitive use of certain key words,
y'know, and ending sentences with a catch phrase constantly, like that
would be something different. I mean, c'mon already. I don't want to
sound cliché but there's just something irritating about guys who sound
like actors on my favorite teen dramas during sweeps week.
"Well it's not too bad if you can get over the whole 'Two guys in
a bed' thing. I mean," I turned around and took a look at Lance, "He's
really a comfortable person to sleep next too." I took a small pause
as Justin's expression on his face changed. "That and he likes to
cuddle." Woo hoo! I love making scenes in the morning sometimes.
What can I do with myself? How do I put up with it? Well, to sum it
up, Justin can bring out the bitch in me.
Justin's face sort of twisted as the image of Lance and I cuddled
up in a bed together pooped into his head. After that, his gaze just
went back down to the computer with his eyes wide open, looking like
he'd just seen a ghost. I laughed inwardly and saw Lance with those
same three shades of red on his face that I noticed earlier. Ok. I
didn't want to embarrass him any further so I just piped down.
"Right! Sorry about that Justin. Lance, let's get something to
eat." He just nodded, his mouth still kind of hung open from my
commentary. Poor guy. "I hope you have something unhealthy and bad
for me in here." What Joey would give to hear me say that.
So we grabbed something simple. I won't bore you with the
details. Well about five minutes later JC came walking on in. Well
DAMN! Is all I can say. I mean, I've seen JC a lot of times in
practice and at the concerts, but I've never seen him like this before
in my life! He was wearing a pair of flannel pajama bottoms that
hugged his hips loosely, kind of hanging off of his waist showing a
little bit of the Adonis lines he had from his abs down to his crotch.
Of course I didn't see the lines down to his crotch, only to where they
disappeared behind the flannel bottoms. But it was enough to make my
imagination run wild for a moment. But only a moment. And that was
ALL he was wearing. No shirt, no t-shirt, not even a little skimpy
wife-beater adored his nicely toned upper body. I had to shake myself
mentally to get myself back to eating. I doubt anyone noticed. You
know you have problems when you have to force yourself to remember that
you don't like guys from boy-bands. So I must need a shrink now.
"Good mornin' fellas!" Is it just me or does everyone but me
have an accent? JC exclaimed his words casually and then stretched,
giving my eyes a little more of a view of his body then I was
expecting. Food Jeremy. Just remember you have food. Now I'm
mentally coaching myself. This doesn't look too good. Thank the lord
these guys know how to make a great interruption.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I heard a scream coming
from down the way. Chris rushed through the doorway still wearing his
own pajama bottoms and a t-shirt while screeching like a little girl.
"Eww. Eww. That was so GROSS!" Chris barked while running around a
bit in the room. JC let his arms fall back down to his side, Justin
stared up from the computer screen, and Lance gawked over at Chris who
must have looked like a crazed mad man in his eyes. I found this quite
interesting.
"What are you talking about?" Justin was the first one to ask the
question.
"Well I heard this loud slurping sound coming from one of the
other bunks last night and I thought that maybe Lance was getting lucky
or something." The words shot out quickly that even *I* had a hard time
making everything he said out. But that wasn't all he had to say.
"But I just went by Joey's bunk to wake him up and he had a bottle of
lube next to his hand!" Enter dramatic pause here. "And his hand was
all covered in it too. He must've been spanking the monkey last
night!"
"GROSS!" Justin screamed out himself. Just then Joey decided to
make his appearance. Both Justin and Chris screeched as he made his
way in the room.
"Remind me to lock my curtain from now on. Shit!" He looked
so...GAY...standing there with his hands on his hips. "Can't a guy
have any privacy here? We don't have to get up at any particular time
so next time Chris, DON'T WAKE ME UP BY SCREAMING!!!"
I couldn't contain the laughter anymore and started bellowing out
like a banshee. Lance joined me cackling like some Hyena. "What's so
funny?" Joey asked while we continued to chuckle in amusement.
"Make sure to choke your chicken when you have a hotel room next
time dude!" Chris interjected amongst the laughter and squeals the two
of us were making. "And what gives with the lube?"
"I didn't buy it!" Joey responded. "JC is the one who gave it to
me!"
"Hey! It was a gag gift and I didn't need it. I figured maybe
Joey's hand could use some help!" Lance and I started to laugh even
louder, and then even Justin started in too. Joey threw his hands in
the air, obviously in defeat, and headed back down to his bunks. JC
started to blush a little bit then. I would too...if I was him at that
moment in time.
"And don't come waking me up anytime soon either!" Those were the
last words that echoed through the bus.
Things finally settled down and returned to normal, or as close
as you could get to normal around here. I finally sat down in front of
the TV and watched cartoons with Lance. He was pretty close, leaning
into me as we laughed and giggled for the better part of hour. Then
Lance decided to go take a shower, well a kind of shower, while I was
left in the room with Justin...alone!
DUN DUN DUN!!!
Chris had left to catch some more Z's too, still exhausted from
the previous hours events. I don't blame him. And Joey was still
asleep. JC had left to take care of some things up front and that just
left the two of us there again.
"So you and Lance are pretty tight now huh?" Justin spoke up for
the first time in an hour.
"Excuse me?" I turned around and looked at him. What was he up
to now?
"He really likes you." He calmly stated while typing away on the
keyboard. "I've been catching a glance here and there for the past
hour and I've noticed how he looks at you. The way he makes sure he's
always close to you. And you don't seem to really mind so I was just
wondering if you two were an item." Well the bitch could be
perceptive. This wasn't like the Justin of last night. This was a
different one, although I couldn't quite figure out what Justin it was.
"First off if we were it's none of your business." I exclaimed
rather harshly at him. He put his hand up at me and spoke up again.
"No need to go off the hook with me ok." His tone was very
simple and pleasant. "And it is partly my business cause I'm his
friend and he's a part of our group. I think that entitles me to some
knowledge if you two are planning to hook up."
"No. We are not an item." Damn. How did this all get turned
around?
"So why are you so friendly with him? You don't push him away or
anything. You don't seem to mind. You two have been attached at the
hip since yesterday afternoon so I just had to ask." How could this
little skank be able to perceive so much and still sound like Mr.
Ghetto Fabulous?
"One. We are not attached at the hip. Lance is very vulnerable
right now and he needs someone he can count on. It so happens that
that person is me. And furthermore," I starred to speak a little
louder since it looked like he was going to interrupt me, "The fact
that I don't mind is explained by the truth that I don't care about
what his sexual preference is. It doesn't bother me. It doesn't
disgust me. I'm perfectly fine with it."
"Reasonable enough." Justin looked up at me for a second and
then went back to the screen. "But if you didn't notice already, he
has a major thing for you. If you let him down, let him down easy. I
don't want to see him crushed." Well what was I suppose to say to
that? He was being so much more sensitive than I thought was
'Justinly' possible. What did I miss in the middle of the night? It
wasn't a blowjob like I'd previously thought. Joey and the lube took
care of that explanation. So what was it?
Where's an Enquirer when you need it?
"I can do that." Besides, that's what I was already planning
anyways. Easy enough to conform to your own decision.
"Good. That's all I wanted to know." He then went back to the
computer. Good lord. What an Internet whore!
Well Lance came back out and we watched another movie. JC was
out there too for awhile. Then Joey and Chris made their re-appearance
in the game 'palace' also. Big old happy family. Fun fun fun.
Where's my axe? I need to chop off my head or at least somebody's.
Britney Spears? The Backstreet Boys perhaps? Or maybe another cheap,
cheesy, commercial music act? I can't think of anymore right now.
I got a little bored pretty quickly. Joey and Chris started to
grub on some 'Hot Pockets', JC replaced Justin as the resident internet
user while he got some cereal to munch on. Yep. This was so exciting
I could hardly stand it. I had to do something soon. Then it occurred
to me.
"Hey JC!" I shouted out quickly.
"Yep!" He asked from his position on the couch, his laptop on his
lap.
"Do you guys have a mini-studio room in here?"
"Uh...yeah." He responded sounding somewhat confused.
"Does the keyboard have a MIDI hookup?"
"I think so. Why?" He got up from the couch and set his computer
down.
"I just want to kill some time." I grabbed my laptop case from
the shelf and asked again. "Could you show me where it is?"
"Sure. Not a problem dude!"
The two of us walked towards the front of the tour bus and he led
me to a doorway I hadn't noticed earlier. He opened it up, revealing
that it was insulated, and led me in. There was an awesome Roland
SX550 sitting to one side. To the right of it was a table and on the
left was a multi-track DAT recorder/player, I was guessing to listen to
multi-track backing tracks so that they could practice. There was one
microphone centered on top of the keyboard and four others attached to
the wall. Cool. Just what I needed. I immediately checked the
keyboard for the MIDI ports and found them.
"Kick ass! This will do great!" I exclaimed as I pulled my
laptop out of its case and set it up next to the keyboard on the
adjoining table. I pulled out my MIDI cables and connected my computer
to the keyboard. Then I booted it up.
"So what are you gonna do exactly?" JC inquired curiously. When
did he start talking to me? Obviously it somehow flew over my head.
"I wanted to practice some of the songs I've been working on.
You see I use my computer to do digital sequencing through a MIDI
program called Cakewalk. It's pretty neat! Just something to pass the
time I guess."
"Can I hear something?" JC asked with that goofy little grin he
seems to always have.
"No!" I protested.
"But you hear our music all the time!" he complained at me.
"Yeah. But I can go into a Tower Records and buy YOUR music.
Mine isn't even on a local radio station yet!" I started to push him
out of the booth. "So get out now I say!" JC giggled and reluctantly
let me push him away.
I closed the door and silently prayed to be rid of him. I booted
up a song sequence and sent the sends to the Roland. A VERY nice
keyboard by the way. I let the music into me and tried to work on some
new melodies. That occupied me for a little bit. So after I did a
little tweaking with the bridge I decided to run the sequence and lay
it down to DAT. And yes, I usually have one on me for occasions like
this. The piano started up, followed with the drums, guitar and
strings. Man this sounded great on this keyboard. Wait! I already
said that. So I started to sing into the microphone and laid down a
basic vocal track.
'Please tell me why?'
'Why did I have to know you?'
'Why did you have to grow on me?'
'Couldn't you see I was more than a friend?'
'After all those times'
'I can't believe that you never knew'
'I can't believe that you didn't see'
'Did you really think that I'd pretend?'
'When the nights turned into days'
'And after all we'd say'
'I even kissed you goodnight'
'I did everything to make you understand'
'I wanted to be your man'
'But you'd never let me try'
'So please tell me why'
'Is there no chemistry?'
'Nothing interesting about me'
'Am I not your kind of guy?'
'Please tell me why'
'What do I have to say?'
'To make you look my way'
'And open up those eyes'
'You can't be that blind'
I finished up the song quickly and then stopped the tape. I felt
so satisfied right then. But I was feeling a little thirsty and I knew
I needed some water. I opened the door and almost ran right into JC.
He had a pair of earphones in his hand.
"What are you still doing here?" I questioned quickly.
"Sorry. I was just listening to you." What?
"Excuse me? Could you say that again?" I was a little upset now.
"I forgot to tell you the multi-track was hooked up to the
listening station out here, just in case a producer needed to hear what
was being done. Great song. I didn't know you were such a great
writer." JC was giving ME a compliment about my songwriting? "And
you're a pretty good singer too. Now I can tell you're a musician."
He gave me a smile and then walked down the hall back to the room.
"Don't worry. Your 'secret; is safe with me!"
Well I ended up wasting a few more hours in the mini-studio. I
finally left, much to the relief of JC who was dying to get some time
done on a song that JIVE wanted him to finish his lead on. Even when
they were on a break, work somehow always managed to creep it's way in.
So I hooked up the laptop to the network connection and checked my e-
mail again.
Damnit! How many e-mails could Jay send in just one day. I had
three messages, all of them from him.
From: jaybjay@yahoo.com
Date: Thu, 18 May 2000 12:15:15 MDT
Subject: Never Hate Me???
To: jhollis78@yahoo.com
Dear Hal,
Well I got your e-mail saying you could never hate me. It made
me think a lot. I don't know exactly what to say right now other than
I'm happy that you could never hate me. Well I have other things to do
right now but I'll try and find you on-line later.
Still thinking about you,
Jay
From: jaybjay@yahoo.com
Date: Thu, 18 May 2000 12:49:53 MDT
Subject: Still Confused
To: jhollis78@yahoo.com
Hey Hal,
I was listening to one of those songs about true love and how you
know that someone is the one by any number of reasons. No matter what
song I listened too, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I think we
really need to meet soon. If at all possible please let me know. The
sooner the better I figure, that way we can figure out if this is
something that can work or if we're just better off without it.
Anyways I still can't find you on-line. I thought today you didn't
have plans? So what's up?
Missing you,
Jay
From: jaybjay@yahoo.com
Date: Thu, 18 May 2000 15:01:00 MDT
Subject: Bored, bored, bored and...bored!
To: jhollis78@yahoo.com
Dearest Hal,
Well I hate to think that Hal isn't your real name, but I know it
isn't. I've just been vegging out on the computer for a while. Things
have gotten a little better around here. My dad seems fine with my
younger brother now so that makes me feel good. My other brother,
however, is another story. He refuses to talk to him. What do you
think I should do to get them to talk to each other? They really need
to. Anyways I still haven't found you anywhere so I'm just giving up
for the day. I'll check my e-mail tomorrow and then maybe we can chat
then. Hope you're all right. Later.
Jay
I sent him back a short e-mail telling him I was busy with
helping my co-worker out and that he was really stressing. The truth
was that Lance was doing just fine adjusting to everything. Except for
the small part, that Justin put so well, about him attaching to me at
the hip. He spent the rest of the day with me, except for the brief
intermission of him having to practice in the mini-studio. That's when
I had the chance to send my e-mail to Jay.
Nighttime was approaching quickly. Before that we even stopped
for Pizza at this small little place along the way. It was nice to get
out of the bus and just hang with the guys for a while. I've
determined that Joey is the coolest of the bunch and the only one who
really fits the description of a friend. He's been cracking jokes all
night and just making talk with me, no matter how small it was. Lance
just stayed at my side all night.
When we were getting ready to go to sleep again, Lance asked me
if I'd stay with him again.
"Sure. But this is the last time Lance. You're a big boy. You
don't need me to chase away the bogeyman!" He practically busted out
laughing over that.
"OK. I'll meet you at my bunk in a bit." I headed to the
pseudo-bathroom and brushed my teeth, etc etc. You know the daily
rituals. I got back to the bunk with a nice clean pair of boxer shorts
on, and nothing else. I can't wear a shirt to bed. They annoy me. I
pulled back the curtains and Lance was just lying there propped up on
one arm and smiling.
"Hey there Handsome!"
"You already used that line this morning." I said, plopping down
on the bunk and trying to get comfortable. For some reason Lance had
pulled the covers completely over himself.
"It's the same now as it was this morning." He leaned into my
ear and whispered. "You're still handsome."
"Flattery will get you everywhere my dear." I said to him.
"Oh really?" I barely even made that out.
"And what are you doing with all the blankets. I need some too."
He appeared to start to protest but I was already yanking them away. I
yanked a little too hard and exposed the fully naked Lance lying before
me. "What the???"
"Sorry but..." he managed to get out before I asked in a pretty
harsh tone of voice.
"What are you doing here like this Lance?"
"I was wondering," he spoke out softly as he put his arms around
me, being very cautious with his actions to see if I'd act negatively,
"Since you're like me and all if you wouldn't..." His voice trailed off
for a moment and then he asked. "Are you a virgin?"
"No. But what does that have to do with this?" I said while
throwing my hands towards his naked body. I kept my gaze off of him,
even though part of me wanted to see.
"Because I want you." He said bluntly. "And I want you to have
me any why you want me..."
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TO BE CONTINUED???
Don't you just HATE anniversary editions? The author always does
something to fuck with your head more than before. Seriously though,
you guys did end up getting a longer chapter out of me. Hope you like.
By the way, the lyrics to the song that Jeremy sang in the story are
written by me and the song itself, Why?, is already copywrited. The
song was written by me and it is protected so please be a dear and try
not to use it anywhere. Unless you get permission from me first.
Anyways, hope you all enjoy and as usual, tell me what you think. Till
the next installment, tomorrow, happy readings!
-Darren
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