Date: Tue, 18 Jul 2000 00:11:36 EDT From: Christine Murphy <heymickey43@hotmail.com> Subject: Hey Mickey 1 OK, this isn't going to have a lot of sex, as that's not my style, especially being a straight female virgin. Heh. I'm willing to recieve comments, and there will be more. ***Disclaimer: This is a piece of fiction, not intended to offend people. I don't know *NSYNC, nor do I know their sexuality, so I'm not saying they are all gay. Also, there's some foul language and it might get steamy later on, so if you're not 18, don't read this. Also, if you have problems with male homosexual relationships, read elsewhere. HEY MICKEY 1 JC lay on his bed, the hot sticky summer air rendering him completely inert. The sweat dripping down his brow, around his neck. He couldn't handle the humidity anymore. He wondered how there could be a legitimately nice hotel left in this country without air-conditioning. Slowly, JC unbuttoned his red silk shirt and threw it across his bedroom, landing in a pile by the door. 'Damn, I hate being messy,' he thought absent-mindedly while pulling his white wife-beater over his head. As it swept by him, the cool breeze of the oscillating fan felt good against his bare stomach. The breeze felt like a comforting hand stroking his stomach lovingly...like a lover's hand. He sighed inwardly as he began to imagine that his band-mate, Justin was holding him tenderly. Dreaming and imaging Justin's touch was getting old for JC, who was used to being able to get any man he wanted easily...but Justin was different. He was younger, less experienced, and still straight, the only heterosexual left in *NSYNC. Also, JC had known Justin since their Mickey Mouse Club days, and the thought of ruining their friendship to fulfill his desires scared him: 'No, I'll just keep it to myself. It just isn't right.' And with that, he took off his sweaty shorts, threw them on top of his shirt, and fell asleep on his bed in his boxer shorts. * * * Half an hour later JC lazily opened his eyes, awakened from his slumber by a rustling by the door. He didn't see anything. Concerned, he shifted his near naked body upward, in order to see better. At the same exact time Justin stood up. "Dude, your room's a mess. Well, for you!" Justin laughed. He was clutching JC's discarded clothing. He quickly folded them up and put them on a chair, his face a subtle shade of scarlet, which went unnoticed by the sleepy JC. "Uh, thanks, Justin. It's so hot here; I just couldn't handle it anymore. It's making me really tired..." JC drifted off, back into sleep, his last memory of Justin smiling goofily at him. * * * JC felt very comfortable in his sleep. He dreamt he was in the arms of Dan, the latest guy he was dating. Dan was unusually warm in this dream, as their relationship was mostly just physical for the both of them, and sleeping sweetly in each other's arms was not normal behavior. Even in his sleep, JC wished that Dan were Justin. His soft curly hair, his all around great personality, the way he bit his lip sexily when he was being playful, yet he also knew that Justin was off limits, and he'd have to make due with empty relationships like Dan until the right guy came along. If only Justin were gay...he'd be so right. So perfect. JC awoke with a start when he realized that he really was sleeping in the arms of someone. Someone soft, but strong. Tanned, warm, thin, yet muscular; this wasn't Dan. Dan was pale but built, with large protruding muscles which JC found overwhelming at times. JC broke into a new sweat as he wondered whose arms were around him...and why it felt so...right. He sighed as he slowly rolled over, so as not to hurt the owner of the arms. It was Justin...why? Justin was asleep, however. JC decided not to wake him, as he looked so beautiful with his curly lashes resting on his cheeks. But when he tried to pull carefully out of the soft embrace of the man of his dreams, Justin only squeezed him harder. JC felt a pain of longing, but Justin was asleep, and didn't know what he was doing, plus they were good friends...friends who hugged and held each other without a second thought...right? He was too confused to enjoy the situation. He was also too afraid that he would read too much into it. It was nothing. With a violent motion, JC jerked out of Justin's arms, too frightened by his increasing confusion to remain there. He looked at Justin, who appeared to be frowning in his sleep. He probably had a bad dream, or something...JC mused. It's...it's nothing. The telephone rang. JC reached across Justin to pick up the cordless phone before he awoke, and he turned his back on his band-mate as he said, "Hello?!....Oh, Dan! Hey babe...what's up?" JC felt Justin's body stiffen suddenly behind him, but he had no idea why. "No, I don't have plans tonight...wanna go to a club? Well, yeah, we can do that afterward, of course...heh," he giggled into the phone. He turned around and Justin was gone. "Just--," he started. "Uh, no Hon, nothing. No one...no...no!" Dan knew he had reason to be jealous of Justin. "Dan, we're not exclusive...don't! Stop. No, you know...I don't have the time, with my travelling....Well, yes, we DO spend a lot of time together, but we're in a band together. Dan...Dan...why are you doing this? It was your idea! Yeah, ...no, I'm not seeing anyone else. You are though...you told me about Jim....See, I was right. Yes, let's keep it loose. So, tonight? Yeah, babe. I'll be waiting...heehee!" JC hung up the phone, forgetting about his confusion with Justin. * * * Justin ran into his hotel room, his eyes red. Chris, the oldest of the band, noticed his friend, and knocked gently on his door. "JC?" Justin asked. "Uh, no...should I be?" "Chris! Uh...what do you want?" "Let me in!" The door opened slowly as Justin let him into his room, eyes still puffy. "Dude, do you want to talk about what's wrong?" "Umm...not really." Chris gave him a look, and he knew he could tell him anything. "Well, uh, it's JC. I-I-I...shit!" "Justin? You can tell me" Chris reassured him quietly with a hand resting on his shoulder. "I...have...feelings...shit. I have feelings for JC. Feelings I don't understand. Feelings which frighten me. I guess I've always felt them, but I didn't understand them. I thought I was heterosexual...I truly did. I am really attracted to girls....well, I was. But, I'm not attracted to other guys. Just JC. I don't know why. I wanted to show him, tell him how I feel. I went into his room, and, then, Dan...Dan. Oh God. Shit. What was I going to do? JC can have any man he wants. JC has had any man he wanted. Me? I've had no one, well, no guys. I'm inexperienced. And Dan. He has Dan. They're going to get together tonight. Oh God oh God oh God. What was I thinking? I'm so glad I didn't go through with it. Shit shit shit," the young, confused, and frightened boy rambled. Chris rubbed Justin's shoulder comfortingly, "Justin...I'm sorry. You really should talk to JC. He won't put you down. He's your friend, and he should really know how you feel. He'll understand. And you know he's not serious about Dan. Dan is just a good fuck for JC. He's looking for more than that, and maybe you'd be his one. You don't know if you don't try, Justin. But, are you sure about your sexuality? This is a big step. You might want to think it over hard before you approach JC, as you might make a big mistake. But, no matter what, JC will always be your friend, as long as you're honest with yourself first, and then him. So, Justy, think hard about this. Coming out has been hard for everyone else in the band, as you've seen Think." "Thanks, I will. I'll wait a while before I approach JC," Justin gave Chris a big bear hug. "I love you. You're such a great friend to me...like a brother!" "You too, Justin." "Justin?" JC called. "Yo, I'm outta here. Do what you think is best, and remember I support you," Chris reminded him. "Justin, may I come in?" Chris let JC in as he exited. "Justin, do we need to talk about something?" "Uhhh...later. I need to think some things over first, OK?" JC looked pained, "But we're OK, right? You seemed, different today...you're OK?" "Yeah, JC, we're fine. I really need to sort some things out, but I'll talk to you when I'm ready. I promise." JC's face brightened, "Promise? Dude, cool! You know you're so important to me Justin." He squeezed Justin's shoulder lovingly with his hand, until his hand jumped back suddenly, aware he might give away his true feelings. Justin's eyes dropped when his hand fell away. JC noticed the look, but misinterpreted it as discomfort at his touch. * * * JC climbed into Dan's silver Porsche, and was stuck by his beauty. His throbbing muscles were offset by the tight white T-shirt he was wearing. JC sucked his breath in, not unnoticed by Dan. "No kiss, Josh?" Dan teased. "Of course, Daniel. I always have a kiss for you," JC playfully retorted as he kissed Dan quickly on the mouth. "JC, that's the kinda kiss you'd give to someone in your band. And I'm more than that, right?" "OK...I'm sorry," as he leaned in and gave Dan a soulful passionate kiss. "That's more like it." And then, in a husky, serious voice, "JC, I think we should be more serious. I think we should be exclusive." "Uh...Dan...oh, yes. That would be great!" as he leaned in for another kiss. Justin's big blue eyes popped into JC's head, then the flash of disappointment in them JC had seen at his touch earlier that day. He realized it was best to try to forget about Justin. But it was so hard. "But what about the distance? Won't that be hard? I don't want to get too involved if it won't work." "Oh, JC, that's sweet of you...but you deserve a serious relationship. I think we can work," as Dan leaned into him for a gentle, loving kiss. "OK, if you're good with that. I really can't offer to much companionship. Remember that."