Date: Sat, 23 Dec 2000 10:58:23 -0800 (PST)
From: Red <redfirewitch@yahoo.com>
Subject: Hide In Plain Sight: Chapter 15 - Suspicions

MERRY X'MAS EVERYONE!!!

Title: Hide In Plain Sight 15/?

Author: Red (redfirewitch@yahoo.com)

Disclaimer: JC is on loan to Earth from the planet
Venus.

Dedication: To Rdr! I SWEAR you would do a much better
job if you were writing this!!! I love the way you
think!!!

**********************
Chapter 15: Suspicions
**********************

JC lay in bed, unable to sleep. His mind was too busy
to shut down. It always was at night especially since
this whole mess with Philip started. Usually he would
be glad to stay awake because it kept the nightmares
at bay. But tonight he wanted to sleep badly. Just so
he could stop thinking about Justin and...the kiss.

The kiss. JC sighed and shook his head. It had tasted
so good. So good. Justin's lips had been soft and
warm. There had been an hint of desperation and lust.
It had been as good as he had imagined but it would
have been even better if Justin hadn't kissed him out
of pity.

"Fuck!" JC swore softly and turned over in the bed,
pressing his face into the pillow. He hated Justin for
what he had done. Right. Hate Justin. Like that was
ever possible. He couldn't even stop loving Justin.
How the hell was he going to get to hate? No he didn't
hate Justin. He was disillusioned with Justin. For
kissing him. For making him feel worse than ever
despite his good intentions. Why did he do it?

What if it wasn't pity? What if...JC sat up straight
and threw the pillow across the room.
"SHUT UP!"

JC cringed as he realized that he had yelled. Out
loud. It wasn't exactly very loud but in the silence
of the night every sound was amplified. He waited,
listening carefully for a sign that anyone had been
woken up by it. Hearing no movement, he laid back on
the bed.

"Stop thinking about it. Forget it. It's time to
straighten out your screwed up life." JC said softly
to himself.

He thought back to what Justin had said at dinner.

Elli Fields. A detective hired by Johnny to...what?
Find Phillip? Was that even possible? What could he
do? Trace the phone call? Trace the letters?

The letter. JC walked over to his dresser and pulled
out the top drawer. He then felt beneath it. His hand
touched the key that he had taped under the drawer. He
pulled it out and walked over to his locked desk.
Unlocking the drawer, he reached in for a small box.
He took it and sat on the bed. Taking a deep breath,
he opened the box.

JC paused for a while and pulled out the letter that
Fields wanted to see. It was lying atop the other four
letters addressed to him. The only difference between
them was that the first letter was crumbled. Other
than that, all the letters were same as they all the
letters threatened his life. JC took out the first
letter and closed the box. Elli Fields need only know
about the first and, to everyone's knowledge, the only
letter.

**

Elli Fields had seen it all.

In his 20 years as a cop and 10 years as a private
detective, he had heard and seen every shocking thing
there was to the human behavior. Desperation, Anger,
Passion, Lust, Delirium. All of which had fueled
crimes and moments of stupidity. But one thing he
would never ever understand was what teenage girls saw
in these five young men sitting in front of him, that
was worth screaming and crying and fainting about.

Upon getting the call from Johnny Wright, whom he had
worked with before in order to track down Britney
Spears' stalker, Elli had began reviewing the history
of the band. Every tape had consisted of young girls
acting like crazed lunatics. He thanked god that his
own daughter was well past that age. Although, she did
go through a brief period of New Kids On The Block
frenzy.

He had learned all he could about the five boys,
focusing on Joshua Scott Chasez aka JC. Born in
Maryland, with a good family background. Worked on a
kids show until he was 17. Then Nsync. But of course
the reason he was here was to fill in the blanks in
the PR crap. The blanks that actually only Joshua
Scott Chasez has known until a few days ago.

"So...are you like Dick Tracy?"

Elli looked up from his thoughts. Chris Kirkpatrick.
Johnny had warned him about the kooky one.

"For your friend's sake and your band's sake, I hope
not, son." Elli answered, hoping that the guy would
get the hint that he didn't have a sense of humor.

Chris shut up and sat down. Elli thought he saw a
sense of relief in his face. As if he was glad that he
didn't have to be funny. As if it was a mask he didn't
want to wear at that time.

"Let's get down to the business at hand. Before we
start I have to warn you. I'm here to help you. Johnny
pays me well to keep my mouth shut and get the job
done. Whatever you tell me, won't get pass this room.
You have to tell me the truth. If you lie and I find
out later that you lied, I WILL kick your asses
personally. I will NOT be made a fool off.
Understood?"

All five heads nodded. They didn't want to let a
stranger into their private lives but they didn't have
choice anymore. Not when lives were at risk.

"If there is something that you think I need to know
but you don't want anyone, including any of your
friends here to find out, you tell me in private."

"We don't have any secrets between us. At least not
anymore." Joey said confidently.

Justin and JC exchanged a look which Elli promptly
caught.

"Are you sure?" Elli asked, looking at Justin
pointedly.

Justin knew it was time to come clean. He just hoped
that his friends wouldn't hate him for lying to them
all this while.

"I have something to tell you guys." Justin said,
standing up.

Joey, Lance and Chris looked at him in surprise.

"What is it, J?" Lance asked.

Justin took a deep breath.
"I'm also gay. "

"What!" Joey exclaimed.

"I'm gay. I also have a boyfriend. His name is Matt
and I've known him for six months." Justin said
quickly.

Lance, Joey and Chris stared at him in shock.

"Six months?" Chris asked.

"JC, did you..." Lance began to say.

"I knew. He told me six months ago." JC admitted.

"Oh! So YOU knew! That's good. As long as JC knows,
right, Justin?" Joey said, sarcastically.

"Joey, come on. Coming out isn't an easy thing. Justin
just trusted JC more." Chris said.

Justin frowned.
"I trust you guys too."

"Six months! Way to show the trust, guys! But then
again, JC kept his secret for six years, so I guess
you were way better huh, Justin?" Joey said looking
pissed off.

"All right! Calm down!" Lance said. He didn't raise
his voice but the message was clear. "Joey, I know you
are hurt by this. I am too and Chris probably is too.
But that doesn't give us a right to presume we know
what's they are going through. They did what they
thought was best. We may not like it but we have to
respect their decision instead of acting like jerks."

Joey looked down, not ready to let go of his anger but
also seeing the sense in what Lance said.

There was silence in the room.

"JC isn't to blame. I told him not to tell you guys. I
wasn't ready."  Justin spoke up softly. "I didn't even
tell my mom until last night."

This time JC also looked at Justin in shock. He was
surprised that Justin told his mom. And last night?

"Lynn knows? Who else?" Chris asked.

"Only JC, mom, you guys, of course Matt and now I
guess Mr. Fields." Justin said, taking a seat.

"Johnny's going to shit bricks when he hears this."
Lance said softy.

Elli Fields decided to step in again.

"Ok, now that everyone knows about Justin, is there
anything else?"

"Yeah."

All eyes turned to JC. Elli sighed inwardly and sat
down again.

"Oh god. Now what! Don't tell me you're married with
children!" Joey exclaimed, earning himself a slap
behind his head from Chris.

"No. I'm not married and I don't have children.
I...I...it's about Justin and me." JC said, causing Justin
to stand up abruptly.

"JC, you don't have to..."

"No Justin." Their eyes met for the first time that
day. "No more secrets." JC said

Lance looked from Justin to JC.
"You guys...are together?"

"No. I'm in love with Justin but it's a one way
thing." JC said.

 "Oh shit." Chris and Joey said at the same time.

Elli didn't even blink but in his mind he cursed the
fact that his job had just gotten a lot more complex.
He felt like he was intruding but he had to know this
stuff if he was going to help these guys. He just kept
silent and let the whole thing play out.

"So erm...are you guys ok?" Lance asked, unsure of what
to say.

Justin looked at JC wondering the same thing.

"We are working things out. But that isn't important
now." JC said, indifferently.  "What matters is the
band. I don't want that bastard to hurt anyone else. I
just want him caught."

Lance, Joey and Chris knew JC too well to think that
he truly was dealing with this as well as he was
letting on. If the haunted look in JC's eyes didn't
tell them how much JC was hurting, the pained look in
Justin's eyes spoke volumes. But they realized that
both of them had to deal with this on their own and
that there was nothing they could do. For now.

"We'll catch that bastard, JC." Joey said,
determinedly.

"What can we do, Mr. Fields?" Lance asked.

Elli saw the guys' eagerness to do something.
Anything. As long as it rid them off the feeling of
helplessness. Unfortunately, he did his best work
without any interference. And the sooner they learned
that, the better.

"Right now, nothing much. JC's the only one who can
tell me anything at this point. But I will have to
talk to all of you. Let's start from the beginning JC.
Now I know about how you met this Phillip. The past is
pretty much covered. I've contacted the Maryland
Police Department about the files concerning the case.
They will send it to me by tonight. What I need to
know is the recent past. How do you know it's the very
Phillip from your past?"

"I saw him. At our concert. He was in the crowd."

"The concert arena is dark." Elli stated.

"It was only for a moment. The light fell on him. I
saw him."

"You're sure." Elli asked.

JC squinted slightly.
"Six years. For six years, I put that bastard out of
my mind. Why would I suddenly think about him now?"

"Wait, this is the concert in LA right? When you
forgot your line?" Chris asked.

"Yeah. That was when JC first told me that he killed
Phillip." Justin said.

"Then you must have seen him." Joey said. He looked at
Elli. "Once on stage, JC forgets the rest of the
world. If anything can affect him the way it did that
night, then he must have seen Phillip."

Elli nodded.
"Fine. You saw him. Or at least you saw someone who
looked like him."

JC stood up.
"It WAS him!"

Elli leaned back in his seat.
"Sit down, JC."

JC glared at Elli but sat down.

"I'm not going to presume anything. I would advice
that you don't too. That's the only way that you're
going to get through this alive. Suspect everything
and everyone. Now, it's my job to be suspicious of
everything. Only then will I cover all the bases. If I
overlook even one possibility, that's the difference
between life and death. And since it might as well be
the difference between my life and my death, I intend
to be very suspicious. Understood?"

JC looked away from the detective's unwavering gaze
and nodded.
"I'm sorry."

"It's ok. Now, when was the next time you came in
contact with him?"

"I got a letter. Our last concert. When I came back to
my room, I saw that the letter had been slipped under
the door. I thought it was from a fan so I didn't open
it. The next morning, I got a phone call. It was him."

"How do you know?"

"I recognized his voice. And he...he called me Joshy
boy. That's what he called me six years ago."

"No one calls you Joshy boy? Not even your friends?"

"No one who knew about the things that he told me over
the phone." JC insisted.

Elli who was taking notes paused for a while.
"Did you identify him as Phillip before he said his
name?"

JC thought hard.
"I don't know. I don't think so. But I...I was in
shock. I said that he should be dead."

"That was your first mistake. If it was an imposter,
he could have been clued in my that."

JC became agitated.
"No! He knew that I had shot him! He knew that I saw
him in the concert! The bastard knew what he did to
Liam! He knew that he tried to rape me! He knew
everything! IT WAS HIM!"

Justin and Lance tried to calm JC down.
"It's ok, Josh. We believe you."

JC grabbed Justin's arm.
"Justin, I swear! It was him! It was Phillip! I know
his voice! I know his tone! It was him!"

Elli saw that the young man was on the verge of losing
it.
"All right, JC. It's ok. I believe you."

JC covered his eyes and started to tremble. He didn't
know why the thought that he could be wrong scared him
so much. He realized that he sounded like a lunatic!
But no! He was right. It was Phillip. No one else knew
what happened that day, six years ago except Phillip,
him and ...Liam. But Liam was dead. Liam was dead and
buried. He had seen Liam being lowered into the grave
with his own eyes. Liam was dead. Phillip killed him.
Phillip was alive.

Liam dead. Phillip alive. No.

"JC!"

JC was startled out of his thoughts by Justin's voice.
He looked up.

"Mr. Fields wants to see the letter." Justin said,
softly.

"It's upstairs." JC answered in a daze.

"Where? I'll get it." Chris volunteered.

"No. I'll get it." JC said and stood up. Almost
trance-like in his movements, he headed up the stairs.

Once he was out of sight, Elli shook his head.
"He isn't very stable right now. I don't know how much
of his words I can rely on."

Justin glared at Elli.
"He's been through a fucking lot! Give him a break!"

"He's the only person who can attest to the existence
of Phillip. So far, we have a letter. One letter. Two
phone calls and an apparent sighting. That's the only
prove that Phillip is still alive! Not exactly rock
solid evidence! Especially since it comes from a guy
who has been sexually assaulted and traumatized by the
death of his lover and not to mention having to shoot
and kill another man. A guy who for six years pasted
on a smile and has been living a double life. Tell me
how the hell am I supposed to rely on him!" Elli said.

Joey, Chris and Lance remained in shocked silent. For
the first time they were considering the fact that
maybe, just maybe, JC was imagining the whole thing.
That maybe JC was mentally disturbed.

Justin saw the looks on his bandmates' faces. He knew
that they were beginning to believe that too. The very
thing that Matt has said. The very thing that Justin
himself had considered. But no! Josh wasn't crazy!
"How about that second phone call? My mom answered
that call. Is she crazy too, Mr. Fields?" Justin asked
sarcastically.

"I don't know. But I'll be checking up on that call."
Elli said.

"This is ridiculous! You are supposed to be helping us
track down Phillip."

"I am helping you. I'm helping you find out if there
really is a threat. I'm not about to start a manhunt
for some guy who was certified dead just based on JC's
words."

Justin snorted derisively and shook his head.

"But I'm also not going to presume that JC is making
this up. I will still be checking out on the
possibility that Phillip is alive or maybe someone is
using what they know about him to mess with JC's
head."

Justin turned to face Elli.
"Someone? You think that's possible?"

"Maybe, but right now. I'm more inclined to believe..."

"Yeah yeah! I know! You want to believe that JC is
crazy but you WILL look into the other possibilities."

Elli nodded.
"That's why I need to know who else knows about JC's
past. For now I'm counting you four, Justin's
mom...would she have told anyone else?"

"No." Justin said.

"Do your bodyguards know?"

"No." Lance replied.

"So only you guys, Justin's mom, JC, Johnny and of
course Phillip know about what happened."

"And Liam, But he's dead." Joey added.

"I'll check into that." Seeing everyone's incredulous
expression, Elli added, "Always cover all the bases."

"There's one more person who knows." Justin said
softly.

"Who?" Chris asked before Elli could.

"Matt."

**
JC stood frozen near the top of the stairs, with the
letter clutched in his hand. He could hear every word
that was being said. Their suspicions that he was
making everything up. That he was crazy.

//Not exactly rock solid evidence! Especially since it
comes from a guy who has been sexually assaulted and
traumatized by the death of his lover and not to
mention having to shoot and kill another man. A guy
who for six years pasted on a smile and has been
living a double life.//

'A fraud. A pathetic loser.'

Maybe Phillip was right. He was out of control. Maybe
Elli was right. He was unstable. But Justin believed
him!

Then he heard that Justin had told Matt about his
past. Correction. About his unstable past. About crazy
JC's unstable past. And why not? JC was crazy. Why did
Justin have to keep a crazy man's secrets? Especially
from the guy he loved?

JC slowly sank down to sit on the floor and rested his
head on the banister, just out of sight from the
people below. It never stopped. The pain never
stopped.

What if he really was crazy? Maybe he was imagining
Phillip but to him it was real? How could he stop
this?

'Liam dead. Phillip alive. Liam dead. Phillip alive.
Liam dead. JC alive. JC alive.'

Of course. There was only one way. The only way to
make it all stop. Make it ALL stop.

JC stood up. He dropped the letter on the floor and
headed into his room. He searched for the key that was
taped under the drawer again. Finding it, he opened
the desk drawer and took out the box. Beneath the
letters was the metallic gleam of the gun he had
bought days ago. He slowly picked it up and smiled.

'Make it all stop.'

**

"WHAT!" Joey exclaimed. "Justin! You told your
boyfriend what JC told you? Does JC know that?"

"I had to. He...he...I know I shouldn't have but I had
to. JC doesn't know." Justin said.

Lance shook his head.
"Well, he's going to find out. You better tell him."

Justin nodded.

"Ok, so now Matt knows. What's his full name?" Elli
asked, writing it down.

"Why?" Justin asked.

"Cover all the bases. Where did you meet him?"

"His name is Matt Vance. I met him when we were making
our video for Bye Bye Bye. He was a freelance reporter
for MTV's Making the Video. He's now working for EW."

"Aw man! A reporter?!" Joey exclaimed. " This just
gets better all the time!"

Justin glared at Joey. Lance quickly stepped in.
"Joey, shut up before you say something you regret!"

Joey just threw his hands up in the air and turned
away.

"Hey, shouldn't JC be down by now?" Chris said.

"I'll go get him." Justin said.

"No. I need to ask you more questions." Elli said.

"I'll go." Chris said and headed up the stairs.

"So Justin, you told Matt everything about JC's past?"
Elli asked.

"Yes."

"And what did he say?"

Justin laughed harshly.
"Well, you might be happy to know that he came to the
same conclusion as you. He said that JC was making
this up."

Elli frowned.
"And why would he say that?"

Justin looked uncomfortable.
"He said that JC was making Phillip up so that I would
pity him, be closer to him."

"He knew that JC was in love with you?" Joey asked, in
surprise.

"Yeah." Justin admitted.

"So he doesn't buy JC's claims." Elli asked.

"Would you stop making JC sound like...."

"GUYS!!!" Chris yelled as he ran down the stairs.
"JC's gone! He's not upstairs!"

Justin's first thoughts were 'not again'!

They heard the sound of someone banging on the door
and heard one of the security guys' voice. Joey ran to
open the door.

Dawson, one of the guards, looked frazzled as he
entered.
"What the hell is going on?! JC just drove away in his
jeep! We tried to stop him but he almost ran us over!"

"What? Why?" Justin yelled. He didn't understand what
could have triggered off JC to act this way. Unless...

"I found the letter near the top of the stairs." Chris
said, handing it to Elli.

"Oh no! JC must have heard..." Lance trailed.

Justin froze for a moment and suddenly took off for
JC's room. The rest followed him. On reaching the
room, they saw the upturned drawer and the box.
Justin's eyes fell on an empty bullet cartridge.

"No! Oh god no!" Justin prayed.

"What?!" Joey asked.

"He took the gun! JC took the gun!"

"Gun?! Where the fuck did JC get the gun from?!" Joey
yelled.

"That night he told me about Liam and Phillip. He
bought it to protect himself." Justin said, in a daze.

 "Where could he be going with it? Is he going to look
for Phillip?" Chris asked.

"But where would he know to find him?!!" Lance asked.

Elli who had been looking at the letters stood up.
"From these." The detective said, holding up the four
letters that JC had hidden from them.

**

tbc...

Note: I promise that this is the last time JC will run
out! Hehe!