Date: Fri, 13 Dec 2002 15:23:58 -0600
From: Cameron Writer <cameronwriter@hotmail.com>
Subject: A Light in the Tunnel chapter 4

Here is another chapter for all you wonderful people who have taken the time
to write to me. I would list you all, but I've been blessed and it might
take a whole chapter to thank you personally. You all know who you are, and
I hope you have some inkling of what your support means to me. A Light in
the Tunnel, as some of you know, is a true labor of love.

The Formalities: I do not know NSYNC, anyone associated with them, or any
other celebrity that may appear within these pages. Therefore, any
statements made about their personalities or sexual orientations/habits are
purely fictional. If you are not of legal age, there are more appropriate
places for you to be, and if you are offended by stories dealing with
relationships between men...well, you should be somewhere else as well.

I thank you all for staying with me and the characters I've tried to make
real. And now:


A Light in the Tunnel


Chapter 4:



	Burke checked the day off on the calendar he had created in his mind,
sighing as time passed slowly around him, every day in the hospital a near
copy of the one before it. The same stale meetings, the same horrid food,
the same slightly scary patients, the same overwhelming shame. Everyone knew
why he was there. They knew he had tried to end his life but failed
miserably, the rope snapping beneath his body weight. The friction burn
around his neck had almost faded into nothingness, and Burke wished he could
follow it. No amount of medication or talking could erase the depression, he
was sure of that. So he bided his time, waiting, until he was released and
could make things right. In all reality, though he would never admit it to
anyone and refused to acknowledge it personally, his mood had improved.
Perhaps it was being away from the pressures others inflicted on him, or not
being around anyone who reminded him of his numerous faults. The doctors and
nurses were constantly praising Burke, if only for the neatness of the
hospital corners on his narrow bed.
	The only change in his routine came from short telephone calls from his
Aunt Lisa. They talked for only a few minutes, and most of that was spent
apologizing to one another. Lisa was sorry for not being there when Burke
needed her most, Burke atoning for his lies when confronted with the truth.
At other times, sporadic and unexpected, one of the gentlemen from NSYNC
would call, asking about his day up to that point. Burke always gave the
same vague answer, not wanting them to get too close or see through the
smokescreen he was throwing up in front of his doctor.
	Burke was checked at every shift change by the nurses, the men and women
examining the holes he had dug in his skin, making sure they were healing
without infection and had not been reopened. Though he had not broken the
thick scabs on his arms and shoulders, Burke frequently, in an attempt to
distract his mind with pain, pressed on the tender gouges. It was not the
same as bloodying himself, but it was the best he could have at the time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

	"Dr. Tomlinson, I'm not sure we should do this now. Do you really think
it's for the best?" Lisa sat in the psychiatrist's office, fidgeting from
anxiety. "He's just started getting better. This could knock him back."
	"I agree, Lisa. Finding out his mother doesn't want him in her home will be
a devastating blow to Burke, but I feel it would be better for him to hear
it in a safe, controlled place. Here we'll be able to monitor Burke. You
won't be able to do that later. We also don't want to risk his behavior
regressing, and that's a possibility. I would much rather have to treat him
now then in another week or so after he's been released."
	Lisa nodded, seeing the doctor's point. "Alright then. We'll tell him this
afternoon. I just pray he's strong enough to hear it. There are ways to
commit suicide, even in a hospital."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

	Burke impatiently drummed his fingernails on the table beside him. He had
seen Lisa slip into Dr. Tomlinson's office, and then been told of a
mysterious meeting after lunch. His throat clenched in apprehension, trying
to figure out what could be so bad that everyone was clustering in one
place. His mind raged with possibilities, each worse than the one before it.
Are they going to permanently commit me? Release me early?
	"Burke," a nurse spoke, interrupting his musings, "telephone."
	He picked up the receiver. "Hello?"
	"Burke, it's Chris. What's up bud?"
	"Nothing much. How are you?"
	"Just taking a break for lunch and thought I'd call. You eaten yet?"
	Burke glanced at the clock hanging on the wall. It was almost time for
trays to be brought in. "Not yet, but pretty soon. I don't have much of an
appetite today."
	"Why's that? Stomach upset or something?"
	"Nerves. There is some meeting in a bit. Aunt Lisa is here for it, but no
one will tell me what's going on."
	The answer was a little slow in coming. "I'm sure it's nothing to worry
about, Burke. I'll let you go. Please try to eat a little something. You're
too thin as it is. I'll talk to you soon, ok?"
	"Sure Chris. Bye."
	"Bye Burke."
	He hung up as a large cart was wheeled into the ward, the odors of a dozen
different meals mixing sourly. Burke took his tray and sat in the corner of
the common room, only poking his food around. A nurse cleared her throat,
and he struggled to get a piece of dry, rubbery meatloaf to go down his
throat, smiling blandly at the prune-faced woman.
	As soon as he had eaten enough to not get in trouble or have his chart
marked negatively, Burke began to pace the short hallway, working himself up
for whatever lay in store for him. No matter what it was, he vowed, he would
not fall apart. His face was a mask of passivity as he was summoned into the
small conference room. Dr. Tomlinson sat at one end of the table, a man
wearing a social services badge at the other. Lisa, her head down and
twiddling her thumbs, was there as well. Stonily, Burke took a seat.
	"Burke," Dr. Tomlinson said slowly, her voice irritatingly soft and
monotone, "we called you in here to discuss an important, though troubling,
matter. Lisa?"
	The woman looked up, her eyes pinched as she gazed at her nephew. "Burke,
honey, I talked to your mom the day after you came in here."
	He snorted. "At least she's talking to you. I'm too much of a pain." His
lips tightened, almost becoming white.
	"You know how your mom is," Lisa continued, her voice quivering. "Burke,
she's selfish and cruel. She doesn't deserve the privilege of even talking
to you."
	"That's not true," Burke argued fiercely. "I'm the one who's bad. I just
mess up her life!"
	"No! But that's not the point-"
	"Then what is?"
	"Burke," Dr. Tomlinson stepped in, Lisa on the verge of blubbering, "your
mother has decided that she is incapable of taking proper care of you.
Because of that, she has asked you aunt to take over that role."
	Burke's eyes went wide, then lowered in defeat. "She doesn't want me
anymore," he muttered in a whisper. "I'm a selfish brat, and she doesn't
want to deal with that anymore."
	"Dr. Tomlinson?" a voice buzzed over the intercom, "I have a call for you."
	"I'm in the middle of a meeting," she replied coldly.
	"I know, but the caller said it was pertaining to the meeting you are in."
	"Who is it?"
	"A Mr. Kirkpatrick. Shall I take a message or put him through."
	She looked at Lisa, who nodded. "Put him through, please." The doctor
pushed the blinking light on the telephone, then the speaker button. "Hello,
Mr. Kirkpatrick. What can I do for you?"
	"Dr. Tomlinson, I wanted to be part of this meeting with Burke. Lisa has
told me what is going on."
	"Don't worry about it, Chris," Burke spoke. "Everything will be all right.
I'm used to it."
	"Burke, everything *will* be all right. There are people around that care
about you. You have to know that." Burke turned away as if Chris could see
his dejection.
	"Chris, what did you need?"
	"Lisa, I'm about to say something I never thought I would, but I want you
to hear me out, ok?"
	"Sure, go ahead."
	They heard him take a deep breath before continuing. "Lisa, we've talked a
lot in the past month or so, and Burke, we've started doing that. I've spent
a lot of time thinking this over, and talking to the guys and my parents.
Lisa, I know you are ready to take Burke in, which is wonderful because I
know you love him like one of your own kids. But have you thought everything
through? What will it be like during family get-togethers? Burke's mom will
be right there, a constant reminder of everything."
	"I figured we'd cross that bridge when we got to it."
	"And what about money? You aren't hurting, but Burke is older than your
children. Sorry for sounding callus, but he costs more. It will put a strain
on your finances."
	"Then I won't go," Burke stated. "I took all of mom's money, and I won't do
that to your family too!"
	"Money isn't the issue Burke, it's what is best for you," Lisa cajoled. "We
all want you to be happy and taken care of. You will never be a problem."
	"She's right Burke," Chris agreed. "We all want you to be happy and
healthy. You have a long road ahead of you. I'm just worried about too many
things taking you back to where you are now."
	"What do you have in mind, Mr. Kirkpatrick?" the social services man asked.
	"After I thought it through and talked it over with people, I've decided to
take Burke in, if he will agree to it."
	Burke stared at the telephone, thinking he had misheard. "Chris..."
	"I'm serious, Burke."
	"That's wonderful of you to offer, Chris, but Burke isn't your family. He's
mine. Besides, what do you know about raising a teenager?"
	"No offense, Lisa, but I think I know more than you do. Justin and Lance
were just teenagers when the group formed. I've already dealt with the
problems and joys that go with teenagers. Trust me, Burke will be easy
compared to Justin." He chuckled softly.
	Everyone in the room looked at each other, trying to gauge the thoughts
floating around. "Mr. Kirkpatrick? My name is Harold Jenkins. I am part of
the social services staff here at the hospital. You have made a generous
proposition, but are you fully aware of the obligations you are asking for?
Not only money is involved. There is the issues of time. I understand that
you have a very involved job."
	"Yes, sir. I have thought about all of these things. Lisa, I know you love
Burke and would do the best you could for him, but let's face it. There are
only four of you, if you count your husband and children, and five of us,
not counting my parents. Money, obviously, is not an issue. I can afford the
best schools, and will gladly provide anything Burke needs. Actually, I was
thinking along the lines of a private teacher. That way Burke would not have
to be alone when we have to go on tour. He could come with me, yet not worry
about missing his education."
	Burke's head hung low, not believing someone, especially someone famous and
rich, would consider doing this for him. His own mother didn't want him, why
would anyone else? "Chris, why are you doing this?" The boy's voice
trembled.
	"Because, Burke, I care about you. We all do. When Lisa first contacted us,
we swore we would do whatever we could. All of us thought it would be easy
to make you happy. We were wrong. But we have gone beyond trying to be good
Samaritans. When one of us call, we're not checking up on some random fan.
We're calling a friend. If it weren't for our obligations here, I know that
all of us would be right there. We would visit everyday. Justin wants to fly
up there this weekend. Burke, we all consider you to be part of our family,
a little brother. Lance prays for you before he goes to bed at night, Joe
rants and raves at any mention of your name, going on about how you should
be happy. JC, the power shopper he is, is already thinking about what to get
you for Christmas. We want you here with us, Burke. I was elected to make
this call since I'm the oldest, but everyone on this end feels the way I
do."
	Mr. Jenkins was scribbling furiously on his yellow legal pad. Dr. Tomlinson
sat back, her eyes glued to Burke, waiting for his reaction. Lisa ran her
fingers through her short honey colored hair. "Chris, I appreciate your
willingness, but you just aren't Burke's family. We take care of our own."
	"So do we, Lisa. I know hearing this can't be easy for you. I think Burke
would be happier here in Florida than he would with you. There are no people
who will constantly put him down just because they are small, angry people.
He will have nothing but the best, including our love, devotion, and
friendship."
	Burke pushed his chair away from the table. "I--can't do this. I can't
choose between you. Don't you understand? I'm not worth it! No one wants me
around because I mess things up. I'll end up making your lives miserable
because that's what I do, no matter how good I try to be! Just--just leave
me alone!" Tears streaming down his face, he bolted from the room, streaking
to his bed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

	Dr. Tomlinson, her face neutral as always, watched Burke trudge into her
office, his eyes dark and wet. As if all life had been beaten from him, he
slumped into a chair. "Burke, I know this afternoon has been very hard. I
understand that you may not want to talk about what you are feeling and
thinking, but I may be able to help you sort those things out. How do you
feel about your mother?"
	Burke stared at a photograph of his doctor and her family. "I think she's a
smart woman. She's getting out while the getting is good. I've screwed up
her life. I don't blame her for wanting me gone."
	"Can you tell me how you've screwed up her life?"
	He snorted. "Do I get more than an hour today? She works hard, trying to
provide for our family. All I have to do is the housework and school. That's
it. But I wasn't satisfied. I just had to mope around, then pull this crap."
	"I see. If I am hearing you right, you believe that you didn't appreciate
all your mother was giving you financially?" He nodded his head. "What about
the love she gave you?"
	"She put a roof over my head. That's just her way."
	"No long talks about anything?"
	"No. I only made her mad. I'm an idiot kid. I don't know how the real world
works."
	The doctor pushed her glasses up onto her forehead and regarded Burke
thoughtfully. "Would you like to know what I think?" He only stared at her.
"I think your mother has a flawed concept of love and how to show it.
Providing for your family is the duty of every parent, but so is taking the
time to share affection. It is also our duty to raise our children with the
knowledge that they are good people. I talk with you everyday Burke, and my
perceptions of you differ from what you have been told. I do not think you
are a stupid child. You are very bright, more intelligent than some adults I
know. I also see in you a great selflessness. You worry about the people
around you, sometimes to your own detriment. You *are* a good person Burke."
	He looked shyly at her. "Do you think so?"
	Dr. Tomlinson smiled, deciding her approach to Burke's treatment was
working. She wanted to knock away all of the negative thoughts he had been
programmed into believing. "Yes, I do. All of the staff here enjoy you
immensely. I read in your chart that you gave Jessica your piece of cake
because she was sad. Bad people are not that thoughtful. Your aunt sings
your praises every time I speak with her. She may be the slightest bit
biased, but I believe she is right. Add to all that the fact that you have
five very devoted, very famous, friends. You know I cannot discuss the
specifics of your treatment with them, but I get at least one telephone call
every day from them asking how you are doing."
	Burke watched a fleck of light glint off his fingernail. "What do you think
about what happened at the meeting?"
	"I think you have a hard decision to make, one that I do not envy you for.
But I think it shows just how much you mean to those in your life. Two sets
of people are concerned about you, and want to give you the best life
possible."
	"What would you do if you were in my shoes?"
	She was happy he was taking the time to consider his options. "I don't
know, Burke. I think you must examine each opportunity, the pros and cons. I
do know that it is totally up to you. Whatever you decide, those involve
will respect your choice. You must, however, do what you think is best. If
you decide based on anyone else's feelings, you will be cheating yourself.
People have dictated your thoughts and actions for too long. This is your
chance to be the hero of your own story."
	"Can you suggest something to make the choice easier? I don't want to hurt
anyone or make the wrong decision. Lisa is my aunt, my blood, but the guys
are my heroes and, I hope, my friends. I don't want anyone to be mad at me."
	"From what I see, there is no wrong decision, Burke, only the best one for
you. You are seventeen, old enough to examine things and choose a course of
action. And don't worry about hurt feelings. Both you aunt and NSYNC will
understand and support you. I cannot see any of them abandoning you, no
matter what you decide. Why don't you make a list of the positive and
negative aspects about living with each person? That may help you see things
more clearly."
	"Alright. I wish there was a crystal ball or something to tell me what I
should do."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

	Burke lay on his bed, staring at the lists he had compiled, trying to
understand all the things he had written. This was the first time he had
complete control over where his life would go, and that overwhelmed him. He
found it near impossible to make a choice, wishing someone would just tell
him what to do. "Burke," one of the other patients whispered, peeking into
his room, "there's a phone call for you."
	"Thanks." Carrying his papers, he picked up the phone. "Hello?"
	"Hey Burke! How's it going?"
	"Hi Josh. Fine, I guess."
	"Hard day?"
	"You could say that. I'm confused and scared of doing the wrong thing."
	"I wish I knew what to tell you, Burke. Just don't let something I or
anyone else says influence you. We want you to be happy, not control you. Is
there something I can do to help you figure it all out?"
	"Probably not, but thanks. I do have a question though?"
	"Shoot."
	Burke snickered. "What are you getting me for Christmas?"
	The man returned his laughter. "I could shoot Chris for saying that! You're
just going to have to wait until then. Besides, I haven't bought a
thing--yet. What do you want?"
	"Umm, a puppy."
	"I'm the wrong person to talk to about that. Lance is the uncontrollable
animal lover. Try hitting him up for a dog!" They chatted for a few more
minutes. "Burke?"
	"Yeah?"
	"I just want you to know that what Chris said this afternoon goes for the
rest of us too."
	"I know Josh."
	"Good. I guess I'll talk to you later."
	"Ok. Bye."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

	Lisa sat in the social worker's office, seething as she watched her sister
sign her name at the bottom of Burke's custody papers. Beverly didn't seem
the least bit phased by throwing her son away. Fiercely, as if proving a
point to her sister, Lisa snatched a pen from the desk and scrawled her name
on the line, claiming her nephew as her own. Her stomach flopped around,
threatening to expel her light, bland breakfast. "Is that it?" she asked
impatiently.
	"Yes, ma'am. You now have permanent custody of Burke Kennedy."
	"Thank you." Lisa glared at the woman beside her, gripping the arms of the
chair to keep a fist from shooting out. "If he wants to talk to you, he will
call. Until then, stay away."
	Beverly huffed. "I'll do what I want. He's my son."
	"Not anymore," she growled, gathering her purse and stomping away. On a
mission, she sped to the hospital, hoping she would make it before visiting
hours were over.
	"Aunt Lisa! What are you doing here?"
	"I rushed right over. I just finished up at the county DFS office. You
don't have to worry about your mom anymore."
	Burke looked at the floor. "The papers have been signed?"
	Lisa patted his hand, understanding that this had to be difficult for her
nephew. "Yes, honey. But don't you worry about a thing. I'm here, and I
always will be."
	His resolve breaking, Burke fell into her arms. "Thank you Aunt Lisa."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


	Burke's treatment team sat, behind closed doors, discussing his progress
and possible release. He knew that their decision would be hastened by him
choosing a living situation. He had flip flopped over the past week,
weighing one option against the other. Lisa had iterated to him that she
would stand behind what he wanted, and she would still love him. The guys
had said the same things. Still, he was torn. Talking with Dr. Tomlinson had
not helped solidify his opinions, nor had checking and rechecking his pro
and con lists. Things were evenly balanced. He knew the staff would call him
into the conference soon, asking him questions about his mood. Those he was
prepared for.
	A small hand came to rest on Burke's shoulder. He looked up to see Jessica,
another patient, standing over him. "You look deep in thought."
	"Yeah."
	"Something I can help you with? Maybe I can give you another point of
view."
	"I have to decide where I want to live."
	She sat, Indian style, in front of him. "What are your choices?"
	"Either with my aunt or my friends. I don't know what to do because
someone's feelings will get hurt."
	"Are they fighting over you?"
	"No. Everyone has said they will support whatever I decide. My doc says
either choice would be a good one. I've listed the good and bad of each, and
they balance out. I don't know what to do."
	Jessica twirled a lock of coffee hued hair around her pinky. "Wow. That is
a toughie. Have you tried imagining what your life could be like with each
choice? I do that sometimes."
	"What do you mean?"
	"Well, what will it be like if you live with your aunt? Or what it will be
like if you live with your friends? If it were me, everything would be
pretty much the same with my aunt. I'd still be little Jessica. She treats
me good, but everything is still the same. But if I lived with my friends,
my life would be exciting. There would always be something to do, and I
could learn new things and meet new people. For me, it would be a choice
between humdrum and excitement."
	"So you would choose your friends?" She nodded emphatically. "What about
your aunt's feelings? Wouldn't she be hurt?"
	"Probably for a little bit, but I know she cares about me and that won't
change. Besides, she would always be there whenever I needed her. Look at it
this way, Burke. Do you want to be the same person? Happier, of course, but
still the same? Or would you like the chance to grow and be more? For you, I
think the choice is between comfort and learning"
	Burke closed his eyes in thought. "Thanks Jessica. You've helped me a lot."
	She grinned widely. "No problem! It's the least I could do for someone who
gives me cake!"
	The wooden door to the conference room swung open. "Burke," Dr. Tomlinson
stated, "we're ready for you now." Jessica squeezed his hand as he stood.
	Therapists, nurses, a social worker, and Dr. Tomlinson waited patiently as
Burke took a seat in front of them. He answered their questions as
truthfully as he could, admitting he still had periodic feelings of being
worthless. They nodded thoughtfully, jotting down notes as he spoke.
Finally, the social worker asked about his living arrangements. "I've
managed to come to a decision. It's been hard for me to do, and I thank all
of you that have tried to help me along the way."
	"What have you decided, Burke?" his art therapist asked.
	"I'd rather wait until everyone involved can be here. I hope you
understand."
	Dr. Tomlinson smiled. She was proud of the way he asserted his feelings.
"Of course, Burke. I'll set up a meeting."
	"Thank you." They dismissed him, then went back to reviewing his charts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

	Anyone who had seen Burke when he had first arrived in the ward was
astonished at the boy who walked among them two and a half weeks later.
Gone, for the most part, was the empty brooding, replaced by a tentative
smile and soft, animated voice. There were still moments in which he would
withdraw, his eyes clouding over. They watched him, waiting for the storm
clouds to burst, but that never happened. He seemed on the verge of being
happy.
Burke had come to a choice, and he found peace in it. He was almost to the
point of being excited, restrained only by the possibility of hurting those
around him. Though he was questioned about his choice, Burke was careful to
let nothing slip, wanting to deal with the fallout at one time. He
impatiently waited for three o'clock to arrive, the time everyone would know
his thoughts. Burke wanted to get it over with, never one to prolong things.
	Burke watched the clock tick by, time passing slowly as if it were molasses
in winter. Lisa breezed in just after lunch, her face shining. She and Burke
sat in his room, talking about current items in the news, something Burke
hated missing. "I tried to call the guys this morning to remind them about
the meeting, but I couldn't get them. Have they said anything to you?"
	Burke's forehead furrowed. "No. Do you think they're mad at me for
something?"
	"Of course not. No cell phones on the plane," a voice announced from the
doorway. Burke yelped in surprise, leaping to the far side of the room.
	"Joey! You petrified me!" A few deep breaths later, Burke walked over and
stuck out his hand.
	The man stood there, aghast. "A *handshake*? What did I do to rate that
low?" He smiled and pulled Burke into a hug.
	"I thought you all didn't-"
	"Don't ever think we don't want to talk to you Burke." He pressed his face
into Joey's shoulder.
	Lisa came over, her eyes watering at the sight of her nephew looking happy.
"What are you doing here, Joe? I didn't expect to see you."
	"I was told this meeting was important, so I flew up to be here in person."
	"Listen to that fat head take all the credit! Like he was the only one who
came!" A grinning face popped over the singer's shoulder.
	"Justin!"
	"And company," Lance chuckled as they all gathered in the room.
	"But--but, I didn't expect you come all this way. I was just going to tell
you over the phone. Like last time."
	"Too bad, little bro, you've got us now." Burke hugged his friends, not
minding their surprise.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

	Dr. Tomlinson stood at the head of the table, looking like the judge at a
trial. "First of all, it's nice to be able to put faces to the names," she
spoke to the singers. "Secondly, just so that we're all on the same page, we
are gathered here to hear your decision on where you would like to live,
correct Burke?" He nodded sheepishly, daunted by the attention focused on
him. "Then you have the floor."
	"Before you make any announcements," Lisa jumped in, "we just want to tell
you that we love you and will still love you no matter what you say." The
others uttered their agreement.
	"Thanks, that means a lot to me. I've thought about this a lot, just ask
Dr. Tomlinson. I was worried that someone would end up hating me, but I
realized that wasn't going to happen. Guys, you are the first friends I've
ever had. That is the most amazing thing to me, even above you being my
idols. And, Aunt Lisa, you've always been the mother I should have had.
You've never kept anything from me. I know that now. Like I said, this was a
really hard decision to make. I had to choose between two groups of people
that I care for. Before I tell you what I've chosen, I just want you to know
how happy it makes me to even have the choice. So many people don't have
even one person who loves them."
	"I'm glad you know that, Burke," Lance said.
	"You're killing me dude!" Justin fidgeted. "Will you please just get on
with it?"
	Burke giggled. "Sure, Mr. Ants-in-his-pants. Someone gave me a new way to
look at this problem, and it made a lot of sense to me. I saw that I would
be loved in either place, so I had to consider other things. If it is still
my choice, I'd like to go to Orlando."
	Before anyone could say anything, Dr. Tomlinson stepped in. "Burke, could
you tells us how you reached this answer?"
	"I thought about what my life would be like in each place, happiness and
love aside. You are so good to me Lisa, but we know each other so well. I
would end up being the exact same person because of that. Our viewpoints are
so similar. I would also fall into ruts because of our familiarity. On the
other hand, I would be challenged with the guys. The old rules wouldn't
apply because they don't know them. I'd hear other opinions and learn things
that I haven't had the chance to learn." He looked around, startled to see
seven smiling, understanding faces. "Do you see what I mean?"
	"Of course," Lisa spoke. "I'd treat you like I always have. That isn't a
bad thing, but a young man needs to grow. You can do that with the guys. I'm
proud of you for making such a grown-up decision, honey."
	He stuttered his reply. "You aren't mad, or hurt?"
	"No, Burke. I'm a little sad that I won't see you all the time, but I'd
have to deal with that when you went off to college next year. I just want
you to be happy, and I think you will be in Florida."
	He turned to the gentlemen, his vision blurred by tears. "And you guys?"
	"Of course we're happy, Burke. And Lisa is right. You've gone about this in
a very responsible way."
	"Welcome to the family, bro." Even Dr. Tomlinson, her impartial façade
temporarily broken, joined in the group hug that ensued, everyone crowding
around Burke.
	"Well," the doctor said, regaining her composure, "let us discuss the
specifics so everyone understands. Lisa, since you are technically Burke's
guardian, I'd like to know how you want to handle custody?"
	"I thought I could sign some kind of form that would allow Chris, since he
originally proposed this, the ability to make decisions for Burke care."
	"That sounds good to me, Lisa. How do you feel about Burke having a private
teacher rather than going to a regular school?"
	"Well, he'll miss out on the socializing, but he never did that anyway. As
long as the teacher is accredited and licensed, I think it would be ok."
	"If I may make a suggestion," Lance interrupted. "Why don't you work it out
so that Chris can make the everyday choices, like going to the doctor and
stuff, but have the two of you mutually decide on the big stuff?"
	"Excellent idea, Mr. Bass," Dr. Tomlinson agreed. "And perhaps some
arrangement for visiting and things like that?"
	"As long as it doesn't interfere with school and things like that, Burke
will be able to come see you anytime he wants Lisa. And the same goes for
you coming to Orlando."
	"Thanks Chris. Burke, what do you think?"
	"You all are in charge. One decision was enough for me."
	JC snickered. "I think you have something to ask Lance, don't you? Remember
what we talked about the other day?"
	Burke's face brightened. "Oh yeah!" He tried to give the blond singer his
most innocent look. "Josh said that if I asked really nice, you might buy me
a puppy."
	The man roared with laughter. "That's no fair! It's like asking a baker to
make you a cake! Sure! Why not?"
	Lisa shook her head in amusement. "I think you've gotten more than you
bargained for, Chris."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

	Burke packed his small duffle bag, waiting for Dr. Tomlinson to declare him
well enough to go. He knew he would be picked up by his aunt, spend a few
days at her house, then leave for Orlando. Someone would pick him up from
the airport, and take him to his new home. Chris had already warned him that
a room had not yet been prepared, waiting until Burke arrived so that it
could be set up the way he wanted since the older man claimed no insight
into decorating for present day teenagers. Burke smiled, in awe of the
adventure he was about to set out on. How many people, he thought as he
shoved a shirt into the bag, have gone from trying to commit suicide to
living with their heroes?
	"Are you ready Burke?"
	"Sure, Dr. Tomlinson."
	"I just wanted to tell you how much of a pleasure it has been to work with
you. You are a wonderful young man with a bright future ahead of him, just
remember that. And rely on those who so obviously care about you. Tell them
if things are bothering you. They will be overjoyed to help in anyway they
can." Burke nodded. Doing something he was sure went against her objective
principles, the doctor hugged him. "Let's get you out of here then." They
walked, side by side, out of the locked ward doors, Lisa standing on the
other side.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There ya go folks! I'm sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. I've
been wrapped up in doing some holiday volunteer work, and haven't had a lot
of time. But count yourselves lucky! Since today is Friday the 13th, I
thought about making this a cliffhanger chapter, keeping you all dangling
over what Burke's decision would be.

As always, I look forward to hearing your opinions. You can reach me at
cameronwriter@hotmail.com  I will definitely get back to everyone who
writes!

Always,
Cameron