Date: Fri, 20 Oct 2000 08:27:15 EDT From: Frnces O'Rtg <frnceso@hotmail.com> Subject: Lone Ranger or Zorro Chapters 1-5 Lone Ranger or Zorro Lone Ranger or Zorro Copyright 2000 By Frnceos all rights reserved. No part of this story can be reproduce in any way with the exception of short excerpts for critical reviews. Disclaimer: I do not know any of the REAL Backstreet Boys. This is a fictional story about five talented young men and their love of music. Aspects of this story may contain strong Homosexual acts committed between two consenting adults. If you are under the age of 18 please vacate this story. The author takes no responsibility for underage readers. Last warning. If underage scat! If you are legal than enjoy. Chapter One A night on the town! Wow! Have you ever noticed how the air is so much crisper and cleaner in the fall? These are the kinds of things you think about when you are riding horseback along a country road out of the way of the mainstream traffic. I was riding along at a gentle gallop enjoying the fall weather on the early October afternoon. The leaves were turning early this year and it looked as if they were going to be on fire this year. I was looking forward to getting some good pictures. I guess I should introduce myself to you. My name is Tyler Jones. I'm 26 years old. Some people think that I am incredibly good looking. I don't think so. But than Roger would disagree with me. Roger is my boyfriend of almost two years. No let me correct that. He is more than my boyfriend. He is my life. He is the reason I live. I love everything about him. His body, his soul, his smell, the way he walks the way he talks. Ok Ok so you get the picture. I am a fool in love. SCRRREEEEEEEEEEEEECCHHHHH HONK HONK!!! Screamed a car as it roared by my horse and I. Trevor reared up on his hind legs his eyes white with fear. "Whoa there boy," I said as I eased him off to the side of the road. "There there Trev. It will be all right," I said in a soothing voice. I could feel the Arabian Stallion tremble beneath my hand. I leaned forward and rested my head against his neck and kissed him on the side of the Neck. "That was just a mean old car that doesn't know that you own the road in these parts," I patted his neck and he nodded his head as if agreeing with me. I laughed softly as I directed him back onto the road. "Come on Trev, it is just a few more feet and you'll be back in your stall." Trevor nodded his head up and down. I laughed out loud and his ears lay back as if to catch the sound. "Yes I know Trevor, I haven't forgotten about your apple." With that said he picked up his pace to the same gentle gallop before the speed demon tried to run us off the road. I was angry at the car but had to force my true feelings from showing. Horses could pick on your feelings real quick. Trevor was upset enough as it was and he didn't need to know how angry his trainer was. I had gotten the license plate memorized and I planned on perusing this. We finally reached the barn doors and I swung easily off the back of Trevor. I worked quickly taking off the black leather western style saddle and blanket. I than removed the bit and bridle and replaced the halter. I walked to the barn doors and slid them open and true to form Trevor was right behind me head butting me in the back. "Ok ok!" I whined. "Man, you have got to be the most impatient horse I have ever met. I rounded the corner and opened his stall door. Grabbing an apple from the barrel I quickly withdrew my knife and cut it into fours and held the pieces in my palm. With in about three seconds the pieces disappeared. I spent the next half hour brushing Trevor down and cooling him off. Making sure he was fed and comfortable I said good night and headed up to the apartment that was over the barn. I was lucky to work and live at the same place. It saved on gas. Once inside I found a note on the coffee table. It was from Roger. I smiled when I picked it up. He was so sweet, always thinking of me. Dear Tyler, Hi Babe! I'm home! I waited around for you all day but you were out on the range taking care of Trevor. You know you should talk to your boss about giving you some time off. I have some things to take care of town. So you have fun with Trevor and remind him that you belong to me! I have made reservations at the Mount Olive for 7:30. If you aren't doing anything maybe you would like to join me for dinner? Love Roger I put the letter back down and headed down the hall to get ready for my date. Once inside my bedroom I opened the closet to find something to wear. I picked out a pair of black jeans and white tuxedo shirt. I than picked out a pair of ruby cufflinks and studs and button tie. Grabbing a towel I headed into the bathroom and stripped. I could hardly wait to get to the Mount Olive. I had been with out Roger for almost a month. He is a dancer and for the last month he was doing his thing. Turns out that a music group hired him. I rushed to get my shower so I could meet my sweet heart. In fifteen minutes I was in my 1987 Ford Thunderbird, (hey for a guy who works at a stable and takes pictures for a living it's the best I have. Any way back to the story. So I climb into the cold natured beast and start it and head off. I pulled in the parking lot and up to the door. I got out and handed the parking valet the keys and headed inside. The Valet gave me a weird look when he saw my car but I didn't care. I was going to see my baby. I went up the doorman. "Tyler Jones here for Roger Lancaster." "Yes sir right this way," the doorman said as he led me to the table. Just as I started to follow him I heard the screeching tires and I turned my head to see what it was all about. I saw the same car that tried to run Trevor and me off the road skid to a stop in front of the restaurant. I rolled my eyes and followed the doorman. We rounded the corner and into the private section of the restraint and there sat my baby in all of his glory. He stood the minute he saw me coming. "Your waiter will be with you in a few minutes," the doorman said as he walked away. I reached over and grabbed Roger's hand and gave it a squeeze. "I missed you babe," I whispered at him. "I missed you too," he whispered back. I got lost in his eyes again as I looked into them. "You're doing it again sweetie," he chuckled. "Sorry," I mumbled. "Don't be, I think you are cute when you get lost like that," he replied as he retrieved his hand before any one saw us. I must've pouted because he just smiled at me. "I promise to give it back to you tonight." I heard some commotion over by the door and looked up to see two young men arguing with the doorman. "What do you mean we have to have a reservation?" asked the short dirty blonde headed one. "Do you have any idea who we are?" The taller one with dark hair who looked very familiar looked down as if embarrassed. I looked away and back to Roger I wasn't going to let some brat ruin my evening. "So when did you get back into town sweetie?" I asked. "And when are you going to tell me who you are dancing for? "You got my note didn't you?" I nodded and tried to grab his hand again but he kept it away grinning that same naughty grin when he was feeling naughty. "Did you get some good pictures?" he asked. "The leaves haven't turned enough to get some good ones. But in a few weeks I should have some good ones for the post cards," I replied as I finally managed to grab his hand. He grinned and surrendered it to me. "And you are avoiding the question. Who is the group you are working for?" "Right this way sir," I heard a voice behind me. I looked up to see the two young men being led into our section. I also caught the look in Roger's eye as he saw the two men. His face got beat red as if his hand was caught in the cookie jar. "I thought you would see it our way," said the snotty short brat. I tried to place his soft southern accent but couldn't. That was until I heard the other one speak up. I could never forget that voice. It was deep, commanding but soft at the same time. When you hear him on the album you don't forget a voice like that. I looked at him closely and realized that one of my favorite singers was in the house. Roger squeezed my hand to get my attention and I turned and looked back at him. He had this silly grin stuck on his face. "So you still have a crush on him?" he asked. "No I don't have a crush on him. Besides he is married anyway," I answered with regret. "And I have you anyway and you're much better looking than he is." "Come on Brian, take that stick out of your ass! He is just trying to do his job!" Kevin Scott Richardson scolded Brian Thomas Littrel. It took all of my will power not to scream like a star struck teenager. I couldn't resist smiling at him. He caught my grin and smiled back. I looked over at Roger in time to see him grinning at me. But there was something else about the way he looked at Kevin. I stuck my tongue out at him. I heard Kevin choke back a laugh when he caught the exchange between Roger and I. "Are you two ready to order?" asked a waiter. "Hey!" shouted Brian. "They can wait! Wait on us first." Roger tensed up and got ready to say something. I reached over and put my hand on his. "Whoa there Tiger, this is our night. So it takes a little longer to get our dinner. Let's just enjoy our evening together. Turning to the embarrassed waiter. "Go ahead and wait on them first." The waiter nodded and headed over to the other table. Turning back to Roger. "Now where were we?" I asked. "You have got to be the sweetest man I have ever known," he said looking into my eyes. He looked around and reached into his pocket and pulled out a small jewelry box. "Umm I um want to ask you something really important," he stammered as he opened the box. My heart started beating harder. "Oh God in Heaven," I breathed. He just smiled at me and stood up and walked over to my side of the table. Most of the town knew I was Gay so it really didn't matter considering the fact that ninety percent of the patrons of the Mount Olive were also gay. He knelt at my feet and took my left hand. "You and I have been going together for almost a year and a half. Every day when I wake up you are the first person I think of. When I go to bed at night you are the last person I think of. Sure you are a little crazy sometimes with your horses and cameras and all. But I love the way you talk the way you laugh and most importantly I love your soul! I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Would you do the honor of becoming my husband?" he opened the box to reveal the ring. It was a very simple platinum band with a diamond in the center of it. Tears came to my eyes as he looked at me with hope in his eyes. "Please Tyler, make an honest man out of me?" "Well since you put it like that how can I refuse?" I smiled at him. "Yes, yes I would love to be your husband." He grinned widely and slipped the ring on my left ring finger. Everyone in the restaurant was clapping with the exception of Brian. He was glaring at me as if I had stolen his show. Kevin on the other hand was clapping along with the rest of the customers. Roger leaned forward and kissed my gently on the lips with of course got a loud response from the rest of the crowd. I blushed a million shades of red and looked down. "Yess!!" he exclaimed. "Made you blush!" I pretended to be mad at Roger because he made it his mission in life to make me blush; he said it made me look cute. Frankly I didn't see how making one's face turn beet red made him so happy but it did. So I did the one thing that drove him nuts. I stuck my tongue out at him and I heard Kevin laugh. I frowned at him for a few seconds. For some reason I felt jealous of him for intruding on our private moment. "Ty?" Roger asked. I turned to him and grabbed his hand again. "What were you thinking about?" "I was just thinking about him is all," I said gesturing to Kevin's table. "He has been staring at us all evening. It's making me a little nervous." "You want me to go and beat him up for you?" Roger asked with his eyes twinkling with laughter. I swatted him on the shoulder and he busted up laughing. "Stop picking on me!" I complained. Roger only laughed harder and I of course crossed my arms and pouted until he stopped. "Ok sweet heart, I'll stop picking on you as long as I get to resume when we get home tonight," He teased me winking at me. I felt his foot on my crotch. I looked down and spotted his foot rubbing on my crotch. "You behave yourself mister!" I scolded him. "I just wanted to see if Jr. was awake," he giggled. "You leave Jr. alone until tonight. He doesn't need to get all excited right now in public!" I scolded him blushing. He sat back and grinned smugly. "He he made you blush again!" Roger said as he leaned forward and kissed me quickly on the lips. I got serious as I took his hand in mine. "I love you Roger," I whispered. "Make love to me tonight?" I begged him. "You know you never have to ask me that. I will always make love to you any time of the day or night," Roger replied as he scooted his chair so that he was sitting next to me. He slid his arm through mine and I laid my head on his shoulder. I was content to sit there like that for the rest of my life. But the mean old waiter had to come and serve us dinner. I glared at him at as he placed our plates in front of us. He looked at me like I was nuts or something. Go figure. "You didn't have to kill him with that look," Roger teased me. "Well he shouldn't have interrupted us by bringing us our dinner," I answered back. Roger just shook his head at me. "You are one strange fellow Ty! But than that is why I fell in love with you," he laughed. About thirty minutes later we were enjoying dinner when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned to see our waiter with a bottle of champagne. "Compliments of Mr. Richardson." I looked over at the table and Kevin raised his glass to me and smiled. I waved and whispered "thank you" and allowed the waiter to pour the champagne. We toasted our new life together and spent the rest of the evening dancing. Kevin and Brian stayed too. Kevin just sat at the table sipping on his wine. Brian on the other hand was at the bar drinking heavily. I rolled my eyes at him. "What is on your mind babe?" asked Roger as he placed his forehead on mine. "You looked like you were a million miles away." "Just thinking is all," I answered. "About what?" he pressed on. "About how great my life is right now. About how complete I am. I mean when I met you I thought I had everything. Now I know I have everything. Thank you for not giving up on me Sweetie," I said as I laid my head on his shoulder. A shadow crossed over us and Roger looked back. I wanted to hit the person who had dared to interrupt our dancing. "Can I cut in?" asked a voice. I looked up in shock. There stood Kevin extending his hand out to me. "Hi Roger how are you enjoying the break?" I looked at Roger with surprise. He knew Kevin and Kevin knew him. "Um yea Mr. Richardson. I'm glad that the tour is over." Roger said. "How many times do I have to tell you? Mr. Richardson was my father. Call me Kevin. And about that dance?" he said looking right at me. "Um sure Kevin. Just promise me you will give him back," laughed Roger. Leaning in he kissed me on the cheek. "Enjoy yourself sweetie." "You and I are going to have to talk later!" I scolded him lightly. Kevin laughed and he took my hand and guided me out to the dance floor. "I hope you don't mind," he said softly. "But I couldn't resist giving Roger a hard time and how cold I give up the chance to meet his fiancé? " He started to waltz me around the dance floor. "Congratulations by the way." He said as he too my ring finger and admired the ring. "He must love you a whole lot." "Thank you," I replied. Kevin was a good dancer. I guess what they say about him being a professional dance instructor is true. But my arms were aching to be back in Roger's arms. I had only been away from him for a couple of minutes and I already missed him. "What are you two doing in Manchester?" I asked. "Vacationing is all," he said back. He looked into my eyes and I shivered at his gaze. It was so intense. "Am I making you nervous?" "Well I never thought I would have the chance to dance with one my favorite singers," I replied. His eyes shot up. "Me? One of your favorite singers?" he asked. "Yes you are one of my favorite singers! And I have a question for you." He nodded for me to continue. "Why don't you sing more solos on your album? You have an incredible voice." "I do sing some more solos on the next album," he said as he blushed. As we made our way around the dance floor we passed Brian. He glared at Kevin when he waltzed passed him. "What is his problem? He has been a jackass all evening!" I grumbled. "Oh him!" Laughed Kevin. "He is mad at me cause I wont get off his case about almost running that horse and rider off the road earlier." I stopped dancing with him and stood at arms length. He looked at me with confusion on his face. "Is something wrong?" "That was you two?" I asked as my temper flared. "Brian was the driver of the car?" "OOOPS!" mumbled Kevin. "We are real sorry for almost hitting you. Brian needs to learn how to slow down on theses country roads. Please don't be mad at me. I wasn't driving." "Do you know he almost killed my best friend?" I demanded. "Your horse?" squeaked Kevin. "He is not my horse. But he and I have been through a lot of shit together," I shot back. "But you're right I have no right to be mad at you. It's him I should be mad at." "Go easy on him. He is having a rough time of it. He and his wife is having trouble lately," Kevin apologized for his cousin. "Ok I'll go easy on him. But you might want to tell him to stop glaring at me like that," I said to Kevin. The song came to a close and we stopped dancing. "Umm I should get back to Roger." "You are very lucky to have him Tyler," Kevin said as he leaned in and kissed me on the cheek. "Don't let him get away." With that said he and I broke hand contact and I headed back to the table where Roger was. "Hey Babe," he said smiling. "Did you enjoy your dance with Kevin?" "Why didn't you tell me that you are working for the Backstreet Boys?" I teased him as I lightly slugged him in the arm. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. Do you forgive me?" he asked with that seductive voice. "Of course I forgive you sweetie. As long as we get to spend some quality time together," I suggested and Roger grinned widely cause he caught my meaning. "You know since they are in town why don't we have them over to dinner?" "That would be great. It will give the meaning "Having your own boss over for dinner. Why don't you set it up? In the mean time I am beat. So do you mind if I head out and go home?" Roger asked as he yawned. "No at all Babe. I'll follow you home in a few minutes." I watched Roger walk out of the club. After he was gone I turned to see if Kevin and Brian was still there. I saw Kevin but no Brian. I walked up to Kevin. "Hey Kevin?" I asked. "Yea Tyler what can I do for you?" he asked. I could tell he was pissed about something. "Where is Brian? I wanted to ask the both of you to dinner sometime?" I looked around to see where Brian went. "He left early," Kevin hurled out "And left me with no ride." "I can give you a ride home. Where are you two staying?" I asked. "At the bed and breakfast up the road," Kevin replied as he picked up his coat. "Are you sure it is not out of your way?" "No way man, it is right on the way. The inn is about three miles form our place on the same road." We head out of the club and to my car. Once in side we drive towards the inn. "So what do you think of Roger's dancing." "He is one of the best ones we have. Not to mention he is cute as all get out!" Kevin said looking straight ahead. "So you think he is cute huh?" I asked with just a little jealousy in my voice. Kevin caught it right away. "Tyler, you don't have anything to worry about," Kevin soothed me as he put his hand on my leg. "Roger is a good person just so happens that he is cute too." "Umm but aren't you married?" I asked looking over at Kevin. It got silent in the car so I didn't push it. As we came around the bend we saw red and blue lights ahead of us. "Must be an accident up there." I commented. A cab was in front of us too. The passenger door open and out stepped Brian. He walked back to us. He was drunk and I was glad that he didn't drive himself. Kevin was surprised too. I guess he thought that Brian had taken the car. He knocked on our window. I rolled it down. "Were going to be here awhile. It is pretty bad. Some drunk slammed into to a BMW Roadster," Brian slurred. My heart stopped and I started hyperventilating. "Tyler are you all right?" asked Kevin as he looked at me. "Roger!" I sobbed out as I reached for the door handle. Kevin scrambled out of the car and hurried to my side of the car. He opened the door and helped me out. "I have to get to him!" We headed towards the scene of the accident. I could see the smashed BMW and I could just make out his license plate. (HOT DNCR) Short for hot dancer. It was his. I started running towards the car. "Roger!" I screamed as I saw them lift his body from the wreck. A state patrol officer stood in front of me. "I'm sorry sir but this is as far as you get," he said in a tone of voice that told me he meant business. "Please I know the driver to the BMW," I pleaded. The trooper looked at me than Kevin and Kevin gave him a pleading look and the trooper allowed us to pass. I ran up to the stretcher. They had him strapped to a spine board. He was unconscious. "Roger!" I screamed out as I ran towards him. When I reached him I reached out and touch his shoulder. "Roger! Please be all right!" The tears had stopped and now all that was present was a huge sense of dread. He looked bad. Kevin came up behind me and took my elbow and tried to pull me back. I wrenched myself away from him glaring at him. "You need to step back so that the paramedics can work on him," He insisted as he tried to pull me back again. "I am not going anywhere without Roger!" I shouted at him. Who the hell did he think he was ordering me around? This guy was really starting to piss me off. Turning back to Roger when I heard him moan. "Roger?" I asked and heaved a sigh of relief when he opened his eyes. "Tyler, what happened?" he asked his breath was rattling with fluids in his lungs. A surge of fear welled up in me but I pushed it away not wanting him to see me afraid. "You were in an accident Baby," I said as I brushed a strand of hair from his face. "I'm cold Tyler," he whispered. He grabbed my hand squeezing it tight. "Don't leave me." "Sir we are going to need to load him on the helicopter," spoke up one of the paramedics. Two police officers took me by the arms and led me away. Kevin stepped forward and took me by the elbow and led me back to the car. "I have to get to Roger," I said glaring at the two police officers. "I know you do. And we will. But right now you need to let them do their job," Kevin said in a soft but commanding voice. It was a voice of reason and I clung to it like a lifeline. "Brian help me get him to the car." Brian had sobered up considerably and helped Kevin guide me back to my car. "He can't die," I sobbed. "He and I just found each other." By now the traffic was being moved slowly around the accident scene. As we passed the accident scene I caught sight of the other driver. He was standing and being handcuffed. "Stop the car Kevin!" I demanded. "No Tyler you don't need this right now!" Kevin insisted. "Stop the fucking car now!" I shouted at him. Kevin didn't listen to me he just kept driving until we were free and clear of the scene. Than he floored it driving past the accident scene. "I told you to stop the car!" "For what? So you can go beat up that drunk?" Kevin hurled back at me. "Yes!" I shouted back at him. "That would do no good and you know it. We need to get you to the hospital with Roger," he said sternly. I glared at him for a while and he chuckled softly. "Sorry Tyler but that wont work with me. Brian tries it all the time and he doesn't even get away with it. You see for the last few years I have been raising the king of teenagers, Nick Carter." I heard Brian giggle in the back seat. "Is he that bad?" I asked. "Oh he is bad all right. I remember when he was 15 he gave Kevin the silent treatment for a whole week. Drove us nuts!" Brian laughed. I knew he was trying to get me to think of something else besides Roger. I smiled my thanks to him and he smiled back. But simple distractions could not keep my mind off my Baby. I kept getting the image of him lying on that stretcher holding my hand for dear life. I looked out the window at the passing scenery. I kept Roger's face in front of my mind the whole trip. By seeing him alive and well I was able to keep from falling completely apart. "Please God don't take my baby from me!" I sobbed quietly. Chapter 2 One door closes. "Mr. Jones?" a voice from the darkness called to me. I shook myself awake and looked around. "Mr. Jones?" asked the voice again. I looked in the direction I heard it from and saw a haggard looking man standing in the doorway. "How is Roger?" I asked in a raspy voice. I cleared my throat and asked again. Kevin handed me a glass of water and I drank it gratefully. "Well Doc, how is he?" "Can you come with me please?" the Doctor asked me. I knew by his expression on his face that this wasn't good. I stood up and followed him out. I didn't know it but Kevin was right behind me. We came to a door and he stopped and turns to me. "I have to warn you Mr. Jones. He has no brain function. We have him on total life support," the doctor explained to me as he opened the door. I took a deep breath and stepped into the threshold of death. I looked at the bed and saw him lying there. "Roger," I sobbed out as I walked to his bedside and took his hand in mine. "Please baby," I sobbed again. "You can't leave me yet." I took his hand and placed it on my left hand so he could feel the ring he gave. "I still have to make an honest man of you!" I felt a hand on my shoulder and I turned around and saw Kevin standing behind me. I was pissed at first that he would intrude on such a private moment. "Mr. Jones," spoke up the Doctor. "We really need to make a decision about Mr. Lancaster. "What do you mean?" I asked backing away from Roger. "What do you want me to do?" I knew where this was headed and I didn't want any part of it. I saw his chest rising and heard his heart beating and that was enough for me. My baby was alive! "He has no brain function Mr. Jones. He is what we call brain dead," the Doctor explained. "Since your name is on his living will it is your decision to let him go." "You want me to kill him?" I asked as I backed away further from this monster. Kevin stopped me. "You want me to sign a paper that will kill him don't you?" "Tyler, it is what Roger would want," Kevin said softly placing his hands on my shoulder. I turned to look at this Kevin person who was telling me what to do with my lover. I didn't see the Kevin I had danced with. I didn't see the Kevin that I had a crush on. I saw a mindless person wanting me to pull the plug on my lover. "Who the hell are you?" I hurled at him. He took a couple of steps back. "You are his boss that is all! I don't even know you! Why the hell are you telling me what my lover wants? How dare you!" I shouted at him. I walked over to Roger and took his hand and held it. It was lifeless and cold. I was used to feeling it so full of life. I was used to feeling it caress my back when we made love. I was used to feeling it run its fingers through my hair when he was kissing me. Now it was just a lifeless piece of flesh. I reached out and brushed a stray strand of hair from his forehead. "Roger?" I pleaded. "Please Baby give me a sign that you are still in there." The only answer I got was the automatic sound of the respirator and the beeping of the heart monitor. "Get out!" I shouted at the people in the room. I heard the door close and looked around. Kevin was still there. "Didn't you hear me the first time?" "I heard you the first time," Kevin said with a hard edge to his voice. "But I have something to say first." "Get the hell out of here! I don't want to hear anything you have to say!" I hurled at him as I turned my attention back to Roger." "I don't care what you want you want. Just so that you know I am not just his boss!" Kevin said. "Roger and I were friends too. Good friends. He helped me through some pretty tough situations and I helped him through some stuff too. So don't you dare treat me like a stranger!" "I wont kill him!" I hurled at him. Kevin grabbed me and shoved me against the wall. "He is dead already!" he shouted at me. "Set him free damn it!" "No!!" I shouted at him. "Fucking coward!" he screamed at me. He walked to other side of the room and sat down in one of the chairs. "That is what you are. You are nothing but a coward. Roger doesn't deserve you!" Those words cut to my very soul. I dropped to the floor sobbing. I was loosing Roger. He was falling from me. "You don't even know me! How the hell can you judge me?" I screamed at him. Kevin found his way back to me and pulled me close but I wrenched myself away from him. "I will not loose him!" I hurled at him as I walked up to the bed. I took his hand again hoping beyond hope for some sort of response. There was nothing but the electronic beeping of the heart monitor and automatic sounds of the respirator. "So this is how it is going to be? I finally find the love of my life and he leaves me?" "You will never loose him Tyler," Kevin said as he bent down and kissed the top of my head. "But you have set him free, he can't live like this. This isn't living." I looked up at Kevin and saw the tears in his eyes. I knew what I had to do. "I want to say good bye first," I said as I got up and walked towards the bed. "You want some privacy?" asked Kevin. I nodded my head and he quietly left the room. I knelt down at the bedside and took his hand. "I love you Roger," I said to him. Strange the tears stopped flowing. It was just Roger and I talking like we always did. Except that it was one sided. Well actually that was exactly how it was. You see I am a talker and Roger was always the listener. I could sit and babble on for hours and he would just sit and listen to me. I actually started to laugh a little. "Remember when and how we met?" I allowed my mind to retreat in time to a better place. One year and a half ago: "Hey guy watch where you are going ok?" I said as someone collided with me at the concert hall. It was miracle that he even heard me. I was in the front roll of a Backstreet Boys Concert. I had stood in line for almost a whole day for tickets a month ago. I was a little nervous about going. I mean what 24-year-old goes to a teenybopper boy band concert? I was glad I went. They were HOT!!!! "Sorry about that," he said in a deep voice. His eyes immediately turned me on. He had black hair and was about my height and built really well. "Hot concert huh?" "Yea I think they are really good." I said smiling at him and yelling over the screaming fans. "And real easy to look at too," he said flashing a killer grin at me. It made my knees go weak. The Backstreet boys had started playing "I Want It That Way" I turned back to so I could catch my favorite do his solo. Kevin was my favorite and it pissed me off that he didn't get all the solos. When he started to sing all that mattered was his voice. It was a voice of angels. After he was done singing he looked right at me and smiled at me. I was in heaven!!! "You have a crush on him," a voice said in my ear. I turned and saw that the dark haired stranger smiling at me. I blushed immediately. "Don't worry about it. Hey do you want to meet them?" "Do I ever!" I exclaimed. He waved two backstage passes in front of me. "I take it it's a date?" he said softly smiling at me as he leaned forward and kissed me quickly on the lips. I was in heaven again. I looked up in time to see AJ give me the thumbs up sign at me. Man was my day looking up. Back to present. "It was on that day that I fell head over heals in love with you! Remember when you used to tease me about my crush with Kevin?" I laughed softly as I wiped a tear from my face. "I used to get so mad at you sometimes when you said the only reason I went out with you was to get a chance to meet Kevin. I didn't give a rat's ass about him. I fell in love with you. God and I am not going to be able to ever make love to you ever again. Do you remember the first time we made love? I gave you my virginity. I know I will never forget it." A year and half ago. "Are you sure about this babe?" asked Roger as he eased my jeans down my legs. I nodded silently for him to continue. "Pleas Tyler if I am rushing you just let me know." I reached down and pulled him up to my lips and kissed him. I slid my tongue into his mouth. Breaking apart I looked into his eyes. "I have never been more sure of anything in my life. Please Roger, I want to feel you inside of me. Make love to me?" I begged. I looked at him in awe as he slid off his boxer briefs revealing himself totally to me for the first time. The air caught in my lungs as I beheld him. "Ohhh God Roger," I breathed as I reached down and took a hold of his cock. Roger let out a groan as I dropped to my knees and slid Roger's cock into my mouth. The sudden taste of his cock sent shivers up my spine. Roger let out a huge groan as he gently thrust in to my mouth. I grinned up at him as I continued my trek down his gorgeous shaft. Precome was flowing out of his cock and down my throat. It was almost as if I was drunk with lust. I wanted his seed and I wanted it now. But I felt his hands ease my head off of his cock. I stuck out my lip in a pout. "Don't worry babe," he laughed softly. "There will plenty of time for that," as he eased his cock into my ass. I groaned out in pain at first when his cock slipped passed the ring. He stopped so I could adjust to the feeling. He spent time kissing me and holding me while I waited for the pain to pass. He than slowly eased out and than pushed back in. I moaned loudly but not from pain this time. I was filled with this immense feeling of pleasure that I almost blacked out. "You like?" he asked as he grinned down at me. Soon I was lost in the ancient art of lovemaking. I knew from that moment on my life would never be the same. Back to the present "And so you see what you did to me? You stole my heart baby! Now I am going to loose you! And you're not even awake for me to say good-bye. Dam you!" I shouted at him. I felt guilty right away for yelling at him. "I'm sorry babe," I sobbed out burying my face in his chest. "I guess I should say good bye to you now. I know it is not fair for me to keep you here. But I want to let you know something. I love you forever. Don't ever forget me and I won't forget you." I reached out and touched his cheek and recoiled when I felt the cold. Choking back sobs I headed out of the room. I walked up to the desk. "What do I have to do?" "I will need you to sign some forms and than we will go in and shut off the life support machines and he will pass away peacefully and quietly," the Doctor said quietly. I nodded and signed the papers. I than turned around to head back into the room. I found a hand slip into mine. I looked up and saw Kevin standing next to me. I smiled and walked into the room. Brian chooses to stay back. >From Roger's point of view. "Why won't he free me?" I screamed in my mind. I could feel the air as it was forced into my lungs. I couldn't live like this! In between heaven and hell. "Let me free!" Suddenly I was free. I was standing next to my baby. I looked at him and was struck at his beauty. I reached out to touch him but my hand passed through him. "Ohhh Baby," I sobbed out when I saw his tear streaked face. He was in so much pain. I noticed that Kevin was with him. He looked so sad too. "Take care of my baby Kevin!" I whispered in his ear. I turned and walked through the wall of the hospital. Once I was free of the room I felt something grab me and I was pulled into a tunnel. I was free at last! >From Tyler's point of view. "Is he dead?" I asked the doctor as I held Roger in my arms. I had insisted on holding him until he passed on. I wasn't going to let him die with out me holding him Roger always loved to be held and I wanted to do this one last thing for him. He nodded as he marked the time of death in his record. "Oh God!" I sobbed. "One and half years just wasn't enough Baby," I whispered into Roger's ear. I was oblivious to my surroundings. The only thing I was concentrating on was I holding Roger. I really don't know how long I sat there holding Roger's body. But at some point they came to get his body to take it too the morgue. Just watching them pull the sheet over his angelic features sent me over the edge. I was barely aware of someone wrapping his arms around me and pulling me gently from the room. "Roger, I need you," I sobbed out. "I'm here Tyler," Kevin said soothingly in my ear. "I'm not going any where." I looked at him like he was nuts. I didn't want his comfort! I wanted Roger. The Doctor handed me some pills and Kevin handed me a glass of water. "These will help you sleep tonight. I took the pills and drank them down. Fifteen minutes later thing I remembered was Kevin holding me as we got into the car and drove off. That was the last thing I remembered. At the Inn an hour later. "How is he?" asked Brian as he took a sip of coffee. "He is asleep Brian," Kevin said as he sat down at the kitchen table. "We need to make some arrangements for Roger." "Doesn't he have any family?" asked Brian. Kevin shook his head no. "Poor guy." "Yea tell me about it," Kevin sighed as he stood up and stretched. "I'm going up stairs to bed. I'll be in Tyler's room on the couch." "Why?" asked Brian. "Cause I don't want to leave him alone Brian!" Kevin said a little harshly. "He just lost his fiancé tonight!" "Be careful Kevin," Brian warned. "You know how you get." "I'll be fine Brian," Kevin assured him as he headed up the stairs. Brian was right. He had to be careful. He was a married man now. Speaking of which he should call her. He stepped out onto the balcony out side of Tyler's room and dialed his cell. The phone rang. "Hi babe," he said softly into the phone. Dream "Roger come back!" I pleaded with him. He was driving away in his car and I knew what was going to happen. "Please stop baby!" I screamed at him. He just smiled and waved at me and kept going. I saw the headlights coming at him. "Noooo!" I screamed. The crash filled my ears as I screamed at the top of my lungs. "Come back Roger!" Kevin sat up on the couch and looked around. Someone was screaming loud. He looked over at the bed and sees me thrashing around in the bed. He gets up and rushes to the bed. "Tyler wake up!" he shouted shaking my shoulder. "You're having a night mare!" I open my eyes and look around. "Roger?" I asked looking around the room. "Where is Roger?" I ask again. I look into Kevin's eyes and see the sadness in them. "Roger is dead," he says softly. Than it all came back. The accident the death, everything. Roger was gone and I was all alone. For first time in my life I felt completely alone. "Why did he leave me?" I sob. "Doesn't he love me anymore?" "Ohhh Tyler," whispers Kevin as he stroked the side of my face with the back of his hand. "Roger loves you so much! But he is dead now and you are alive and he wants you to live." "I don't want to live with out Roger!" I shouted at poor Kevin. I lie back on my pillow and curl up in a fetal position and close my eyes. "Roger," I plead over and over again. I barely remembered Kevin putting his arms around and holding me until I got to sleep. Chapter 3 Denial! The sun hits me in the face as I open my eyes. I feel a pair of arms around me and I turn around and receive the shock of my life. There in bed with me is Kevin Richardson of the Backstreet Boys. "AUUUUUGGHHHHH!" I scream as I jump out of bed. Poor Kevin sits up in bed screaming too. The door flies open and Brian sticks his head in. "What the hell are you doing in bed with me?" I demanded. "Where is Roger?" Than it came rushing back at me. Roger was dead. The cloud that settled over me was back. I sink to the couch and sat back staring blankly at the ceiling. "He is never coming back is he?" I feel someone sit beside me and wrap his arm around me. "Roger will always be here with you in your heart," a soft southern accented voice said in my ear. I feel a warm hand on my chest and I looked down to see Brian's hand. I shove his hand away and stand up and walk out of the room. "Tyler?" asked Kevin as he followed me out. "Where are you going?" "I'm going home. I have work to do," I said bluntly as I grabbed my car keys and headed out. I could hear Kevin running after me. "You can't go back to work! You just lost your fiancé!" he argued. By this time I had reached the front door and reached for the handle only to have Kevin grab my hand. "What?" I demanded. "What do you want from me?" "I care about you!" Kevin said. "Why?" I demanded. "I mean come on! We've only met yesterday. We had one dance and on top of that you are married! So why the hell should you care for me?" "You know something Tyler?" asked Kevin. "You're right! Why the hell should I care for you? You go on home and go to work and pretend that everything is all right!" I glared at him for a few seconds before wrenching open the door and running to the car and getting in and starting it and peeling wheels out of the drive way. >From Kevin's point of view "Well I sure handled that well," I grumbled as I closed the door and headed back into the Inn. Brian came trotting down the stairs buttoning up his shirt. "Well Tyler just tore out of here like a bat out of hell." "No surprise there Kevin. I heard everything you two said," Brian said as he headed into the dinning room. "I mean he is right. You are married so why are you chasing him?" "I'm not chasing him Brian," I sighed as I picked up a plate and started putting food on it from the bar. "I'm just worried about him is all." "I get the impression that he is the kind of guy who wants to sort things out on his own. You on the other hand want to control and take care of people. He is not going to let you do that." Brian said in a logical tone of voice. "And forget about him falling for you too. Did you see the way he looked at Roger?" I nodded. "He is a romantic and he believes in a serious relationship." "I know all that Brian, so don't worry about me," I hurled at him. "I am not worried about you Kevin, I'm worried about Tyler. I know you; you wont give up until you have what you want. And I can tell that you want Tyler in the worst way," Brian hurled at me. "Jesus Christ Brian!" I shouted. "He just lost his fiancé last night. Give me some credit will you?" I stomped out of the house and climbed into the car and drove off. After driving for a few minutes I passed the Flying R Riding Stables. "Hmm," I thought to myself. "I wonder if this is the place where Roger works?" I did a u-turn and headed back and drove into the driveway. Once in front of the barn I spotted his thunderbird. I was at the right place. I started to head to the house when I spotted the barn. It was a strange looking building with living quarters up in the loft. I also noticed some steps up the side of the barn so I climbed to the top of the stairs and rang the doorbell. "Come in!" shouted a voice. I turned the handle and walked in. I heard some voices in the room off to my right so I headed in. >From Tyler's point of view. "I can't thank you enough for coming out here like this," I said to the funeral director. "Roger always liked dark stained woods so the casket should be stained cherry and the satin should be red," I instructed the director who nodded and took down the notes. "The service should be simple and sweet. He never did like a lot of people making a fuss over him. We don't have to worry about a plot cause my mom has a couple of extra ones and she said I could use one of them." "Do you want a limo service provided for the family and friends?" the funeral director asked. "It will cost more." "We will provide the limos for the funeral," spoke up a voice. "That is if it is ok with you?" Kevin asked looking at me for approval. "Please Tyler, Roger meant a lot to us and we would like to help in some way." I nodded yes. "Ok if that is all than I will see you tonight for the viewing of the Body," said the Funeral Director as he stood up. "Viewing of the body?" I asked. "Yes, I am sure you will want a viewing of the Body won't you?" asked the Director. "No!" I turned and headed to the window and looked out of it and out onto the front lawn. "I don't want a open casket service." "But Tyler there--," Kevin started. "I said no!" I shouted. "And that is all I have to say about it!" "Very well sir," said the director. "If there is nothing else." "Yes there is one more thing," I said looking at the floor. God I hated talking about money especially in front of people. "The cost & payment arrangements--," "Sir, we can work that all out after the funeral," the director said politely sparing me any more embarrassment. I nodded and walked him to the door. After he left I turned my attention back to Kevin. "What can I do for you Kevin?" I asked. "I actually stopped here thinking I could get a chance to do some Horse back riding," I didn't believe him but let it go. "That won't be a problem Mr. Richardson. The schedule is free all day so we can take you out any time you're ready," I said going into employee/customer mode. I grinned slightly when I saw Kevin cringe. "Is there a problem sir?" "Please call me Kevin," he requested of me. "I'm sorry sir but that would be unprofessional," I stated formally. "Damn it Tyler!" he hurled at me. "You are not going to cut me any slack are you?" "What do you want from me?" I hurled back at me. "I want the truth this time. No bull shit!" "I care about you Tyler. Don't ask me to explain it but just as Roger died I got the impression that he wanted me to take care of you," Kevin explained. "You are a married man Kevin!" I hurled at him. "What the hell is your wife going to say if you are always hanging around me?" "She will understand!" he shouted at me. "We have an agreement!" "What kind of agreement?" I demanded. "Our marriage is a business arrangement, that's all!" Kevin explained glaring at me. My mouth dropped open as I stared at him in shock as it finally came to me. "What?" "You're gay aren't you?" I asked. Kevin walked over to the couch and sat down. "Well are you?" I pressed on. "Yes," he said at last. "I'm gay and the marriage was set up to throw off suspicion." "So now we come to the hard question Kevin," I said as I sat across from him. "What do you want from me?" "A chance?" he asked looking up at me. "NO!" I said bluntly. I watched him cringe at my outburst. "You are married and I wont get involved with a married man." Chapter 4 The Truth will set you free! Silence reigned supreme in the two-bedroom apartment as Kevin sat there looking down at the floor. He finally broke the silence. "I'm sorry Tyler, I had no right to ask you to do that. I mean you just lost your fiancé and here I am trying to seduce you!" Kevin buried his head in his hands from embarrassment. I couldn't help it he looked so helpless. I sat next to him and pulled him in a hug. "It's all right Kevin," I said as I kissed the top of his head. "If you weren't married I would be tempted to go out with you. I mean you are an incredibly good-looking man. Not as good looking as Roger but not bad." I teased him. He looked up at me and smiled. 'Please smile at me again,' I pleaded to myself. I looked at the clock. "Hey if you want to get that ride in we should get going. I know where all the best places are so I will be your partner." I grabbed my camera bag on the way out the door. Kevin followed me out the door and down to the barn. "You can take Lancer out and I will take Trevor out," I said as I pushed to huge door open. I could hear Trevor's neigh as he heard the door open. "Patience young man!" I scolded him. He continued to make noise as I approached his stall. When I got there he looked at me hard for a few seconds. I could've sworn that his eyes watered up. I lost it as I laid my head against his neck. "He's gone Trevor!" I sobbed. Trevor just stood there nuzzling my shoulder gently. "Roger is dead Trev!" I looked up into Trevor's sad eyes as he picked up on my emotions. I reached into my pocket and grabbed a sugar cube and held it out to him. He sniffed at it and pushed it to the floor. I patted him on the shoulder. "You want to go for a ride boy?" I asked. He nodded his head up and down the minute he heard the word ride. "Ok Ok Buddy, let me get you saddled up and we'll be out of here!" I heard Kevin talking to Lancer as he got him ready. Fifteen minutes later we were on our way. The air was just as crisp and clean as it was yesterday. The leaves were turning faster and I was glad that I had brought my camera. "So how long have you been working here?" asked Kevin as he finally caught up with me. You see Trevor likes to take off and run as fast as he can for the first fifteen minutes of the ride. After he got it all out of his system he slowed down to a walk. "Ever since I got out of high school. I love working here. I can't think of a better place to be right now," I said as I snapped a picture of the mountain range. I frowned as I saw that the leaves were not as bright as I had hoped. "What about your photography?" Kevin asked as he rode the edge of the cliff. He looked out over the valley and just as he did that Lancer bent down to eat some grass. The Picture was perfect. I started snapping pictures. Kevin looked over at me and blushed and than looked away again. I shrugged and climbed down from Trevor and slapped him on the rump and he took off. Kevin climbed down from Lancer and slapped him on the rump too. "This is a hobby. I make good money at it though," I said modestly. I swung off the backpack and picked up the saddlebag I had removed from Trevor's saddle. "I hope you are hungry," I commented as I started taking things out of the bag. I had ham and turkey and bread. I also had some chips and fruit and a couple of bottles of water. I tossed one at Kevin and he caught it and removed the lid and drank heavily from it. I watched as he tilted his head back and swallowed from the bottle. 'God is he ever sexy!' I said to myself before thinking. 'What the hell am I thinking? Roger hasn't been dead for a day and already I am ogling at another guy.' I wiped an angry tear from my face before Kevin had a chance to see it. I picked up my camera and hit the rewind button and replaced the roll of film. Kevin sat down next to me and helped himself to the food. "This is a nice place to stop," he commented as he took a bite from his sandwich. "Do you come here often?" Flash back "Oh no you don't!" laughed Roger as I dumped a bottle of water on him. I busted up laughing as he looked at me shocked. He than tackled me so that I was lying under him. I smiled innocently up at him. "You think you are cute don't you?" "Yes as a matter of fact I am pretty cute, at least that is what my good looking boyfriend tells me," I giggled out. He growled at me as he lay on top of me pressing his lips against mine. I opened my mouth to allow his demanding tongue in. We kissed for a few moments before coming up for air. When we broke apart I looked up at him. "Wow!" I laughed. "I'm going to have to pour water on you more often." He threw back his head and laughed a loud as he rolled off of me so that he was lying beside me. I laid my head on his chest and looked over the cliff where the valley was. I could hear the strong steady beat of his heart through his shirt. "I could lie here forever," I said as I slid my hand up his shirt. "I know baby, this is a great place to get away from it all," he said as he bent down and kissed the top of my head. Back to present day "Tyler?" asked Kevin startling me back to reality. "Are you all right?" He was looking at me with concern. I realized that my face was wet with tears. I wiped them off and gathered myself. "This was Roger's favorite place to come," I said sadly as I quickly finished my sandwich. "Oh man Tyler," Kevin breathed. I looked over at him and saw nothing but concern and compassion written all over his face. It should have made me feel better but it didn't. I was mad again. "Don't worry your self over it Kevin!" I hurled at him. "Fine!" he hurled at me too. "I won't worry myself over your sorry ass!" He got up and stormed off leaving me alone. I looked up at the sky and allowed the sadness to overcome me. "Why!" I screamed. "What the hell did I do to deserve this Lord?" I lay back on my back and stared up at the sky. I knew I was being hard on Kevin. All he was doing was trying to be there for me. I was being a complete jackass. I blushed as I thought about how Roger would react to my treatment of Kevin. I sighed and got up and went to follow Kevin. I found him by the horses. When I approached him I could hear him talking to Trevor. "Man what a stubborn Ass!" he hurled at Trevor. Trevor nodded his head as if he was agreeing with him. Traitor! "I mean you tell me, what do I have to do to get anywhere with him?" Trevor head butted him and I almost busted up laughing. Kevin just shrugged his shoulder and held out a piece of apple. He had cut a small piece for Trevor. But Trevor being true to form went for the larger piece. "Hey!" shouted Kevin as he busted up laughing. "That was my lunch!" Trevor head butted him again. "So you and Tyler good friends?" he asked the horse. Trevor sniffed at Kevin's pockets as if to look for more snacks. "Sorry buddy but nothing there." Trevor snorted and stamped his feet. "What? You don't believe me? Here I'll show you," Kevin yelped as he pulled his pockets out. Trevor sniffed them again and than walked off. "A lot of help you are!" Kevin grumbled as he kicked the ground. I couldn't help it I busted up laughing and Kevin jerked his head around shocked that I had overheard his conversation with Trevor. "The trick is to with hold the treats until you get your way," I said laughing at Kevin's confused look. "I'm sorry Kevin, I shouldn't have acted that way to you." "No Tyler it is me that should be sorry, I mean you just lost the love of your life and here I am trying to shove my way into your life," Kevin apologizes. I started to argue but Kevin stopped my by putting his finger to my lips. It was so warm and I loved the simple touch. "I mean it Tyler. I've been pushing from the moment that Roger had the accident. I had no right to do that. You have my word, I won't do that anymore. Forgive me?" he pleaded as he smiled. What was I to do? I mean Kevin just poured his heart to me. "I forgive you Kevin," I said graciously. "Now we had better find the horses and finish our ride." The horses weren't that far off. Soon we were on our way to the other side of the property. We stopped at a few other look out points and I managed to get a lot of good pictures of the scenery and of Kevin too. He was gracious enough to pose for them. On the way back he asked me a question that surprised me. "Lone Ranger or Zorro?" he asked suddenly. I reined Trevor to a stop and turned him around to look at Kevin. "What?" I demanded. He laughed at my confusion. I automatically pouted and he laughed harder. "What?" I demanded again. "Lone Ranger or Zorro?" he asked again. "I mean when you were a kid which one did you like?" "Neither," I answered bluntly. "Come on every kid liked either the Lone Ranger or Zorro," he responded. "Not me," I replied. "For me it was the Phantom!" I smiled at the child hood memory. "Who the hell was the Phantom? He asked with his nose all scrunched up. I laughed at him this time. I couldn't help it! He looked so cute when he did that. "Oh come one!" I laughed. "Don't tell me you've never heard to the "Ghost Who Walks!" Kevin cocked his head to one side. "Oh man he was soooo Cool! Are you telling me that you never heard of the Phantom?" "Nope sorry, I guess I lived a sheltered life," Kevin said as he grinned sheepishly. I noticed that the sky was turning pink. "We need to head back. The boss doesn't like it when we are out after dark," I said. Kevin nodded his agreement and turned his horse back to the stables. Back at the barn. "I enjoyed today Tyler," Kevin said as he took the saddle off of Lancer. "Yea I kinda enjoyed it too," I replied as I fed Trevor his second apple of the day. Kevin gave me a scolding look and I just shrugged my shoulders. "What about Brian?" I asked suddenly remembering his cousin. "What did he do today?" "He probably spent most of the day sleeping," replied Kevin as he closed the stall door. "He hasn't been sleeping to well lately. That is one of the reasons I took him on this trip. He needs to unwind a little." "You know I thought he looked a little to serious on the last video you guys did, and by the way I loved it," I complimented Kevin. "All though you didn't get a solo in this song. Come on what is the deal with that? You have got an awesome voice." He blushed at the compliment. By this time we had reached the top of the stairs and I reached into my pocket and dug out my key. I threw open the door and walked in. "I'm going to take a quick shower before I start dinner. You want to clean up after I am done?" "Sure that would be great," Kevin said as he sat down on the couch. I headed off to the bedroom to get my stuff and than into the bathroom to get cleaned up. "Hey Nick!" Kevin said into the cell phone. "Tell me everything you know about the Phantom!" "What?" asked Nick surprised to hear from Kevin. When ever he went on vacation no one ever heard from Kevin. "Kevin? What are you talking about?" "The Phantom, you know the Ghost Who Walks. Jesus Nick, I thought you were the comic book hero king or something. I need to know what this dude is all about and hurry!" Kevin prodded as he listen to see if I was done with my shower. "Why do you need to know? On second thought don't tell me. I don't think I want to know! Where are you staying? I'll send them over night express." asked Nick. Kevin gave him the address. "Ok I am sending three of my most valued Comics. Don't loose them. They will give you all the info you need to know about the Phantom. Umm Kevin, who is he?" "What are you talking about?" asked Kevin. "Who is he? You know you don't get all excited about stuff like this. There has to be a guy involved." "His name is Tyler, and that is all you are getting!" sighed Kevin as he rolled his eyes. How he longed for the day when Nick was just a little guy. He was growing up way to fast. "Ok Kevin," laughed Nick. "I promise to leave you alone. The comics should arrive sometime tomorrow." "Thanks Nick!" Kevin said happily. "I won't forget this!" "You're welcome I think," Nick said in a confused tone of voice. Chapter Five Succumb to Temptation! I walked out of the bathroom feeling better than I had felt in the twenty four hours. "Bathroom is all yours Kevin!" I shouted at him on my way to the kitchen. "Thanks Tyler," Kevin shouted as he headed into the shower. I hoped he would find the boxers and sweat suit I had left for him. They were Roger's and since he was about the same size of Kevin I was sure they would fit. I opened the Freezer and spotted the post it note on tonight's dinner. "Uggh!" I groaned. It was pasta night. It was all right but not just my favorite. I was well on my way to completing dinner when Kevin emerged from the bathroom. I turned and looked at him. He had on a pair of black sweat pants and the black wife beater that I had lent him. I had to admit he looked incredible. "You want to stay for dinner?" I asked tearing my eyes from him. "Sure, I mean if it is not to much trouble," Kevin replied. "No problem at all. Why don't you give Brian a call and see if he wants to join us?" I suggested. Kevin nodded and grabbed the phone off the wall. "Brian?" Kevin asked. "Kevin, where the hell have you been?" Brian shouted. I chocked back a laugh when I saw Kevin wince and hold the phone out from ear. "I've been over at Tyler's riding all day," Kevin said. "Hi Brian!" I shouted over my shoulder as I added the pasta to the water. Kevin spent a few moments on the phone giving Brian directions to my place than he hung up and went to the stove and lifted the lid on the pot. I swatted his hands away. "Shoo!" I scolded as I pushed him back into the living room. He just laughed as he walked into the living room. "Do you mind if I play the stereo?" he asked. "No, go ahead, I could really go for some music!" I shouted back. I heard him close the stereo cabinet and than to my horror "Show me the Meaning of Being Lonely" blared through the speakers. To his credit he left it playing. When I got home this morning I played that song over and over again as I thought about Roger. It had the same effect on me tonight as it did for me this morning. In no time at all I was crying like a baby. I felt two arms surround me and this time I didn't fight it. Kevin continued to hold me while the song played. When it finished he took my chin and raised my head so I was looking into his green eyes. "I miss him so much!" I sobbed out. "Why did he have to die?" I broke away from Kevin's embrace when I heard the water boiling. After adding the pasta I sat down at the kitchen table. Kevin sat across from me. "We had such a wonderful last year and a half," I sighed sorrowfully. "Do you see that stereo cabinet in there?" I asked. Kevin nodded, "he got that for me on my birthday." He was so happy to give me that gift. I thought it was too expensive but he wouldn't take it back. He said I was worth it!" The tears had started again. But this time I was able to control them. "Roger was a great person," Kevin said quietly. "I remember when I was going through a rough time about a month ago. We were away from our families and Brian and I were fighting. I had no one to turned to. Roger found me after practice one day crying my eyes out. He took the time to comfort me and make me feel like there was a reason to go on. He was a true friend and I miss him too Tyler." "So where do we go from here?" I asked. Kevin shrugged his shoulders and looked down at his hands. They were trembling with grief and for the first time I realized that I wasn't the only one hurting. I reached over and took hold of his hand and held it. He looked up at me and our eyes locked. "You do understand that I do find you very--," I started but Kevin's fingers pressed up against my lips silencing me. He and I slowly moved towards each other. My eyes closed as I felt his breath on my face. I knew that once that I crossed the line there was no going back. "STOP!!" my mind screamed. I shook my head and plunged forward pressing my lips up against Kevin's. He moaned softly in my mouth which sent shivers up my spine. His tongue gently probed my lips as if seeking permission to enter. I parted my lips and my curious guest slid in. I felt his hand brush up aside my face and I opened my eyes and looked into this. He finally parted licking his lips as if savoring the taste. "Umm I should finish dinner, um Brian will be here soon," I stammered as I walked towards the stove. "I think we should talk about this," Kevin said looking at me with those eyes again. I looked at him with pleading eyes. "After Dinner, please?" I begged. He nodded as he grabbed the plates I handed him and he started to set the table. The door bell rang and I went to answer it. I opened the door and Brian was standing there with a bottle of wine. "Here," he said smiling at me. "I love this set up man." He said as he walked into the apartment and looked around. He looked back at me and frowned when he heard the rest of Backstreet Boys playing on the stereo. "Hey don't look at me," I laughed. "Talk to your crazy cousin in there," I said as I directed him into the kitchen. Three hours later dinner was over and Brian had left. Kevin and I were sitting on the deck that overlooked the rest of the farm. I looked over at the mountains. The moon was full and you could see them as well as if it were daylight. I felt a hand slide into mine. I looked over and smiled at Kevin. He smiled back. "Ok Kevin, it's later. So why don't you tell me what is on your mind?" I asked. "I have no right to ask you this," Kevin started. "But I can't help it. I feel drawn to you. I don't know how to explain it but I can't help the way I feel." "God Kevin, you are a married man, and I haven't even buried Roger yet. How the hell can we do this?" I looked up at the full moon with tears in my eyes. I could almost see Roger's scolding eyes looking down at me. I felt a hand wipe the tears from my eyes. "God I hate to see you in pain," whimpered Kevin as he laid his head on my shoulder. I put my arms around him and pulled him close. I could feel him shivering. "Let's go inside and sit by the fireplace," I suggested. I stood up and took his hand and led him into the bedroom and started the gas fireplace. I laid back on the bed and patted the bed beside me. He looked at me confused. "We'll just lay here and hold each other," I promised. Kevin climbed beside me and spooned me and held me close. I looked into the flickering flames enjoying the warmth they gave out. Before long I heard the steady breathing ok Kevin. I looked back and saw that he was asleep. I shrugged my shoulders and gently untangled myself from him and slid out of the bed and shut down the fireplace and grabbed a pillow and comforter and headed out into the living room to sleep on the couch. Hey everybody! I can't believe this! This is a new story I have been working on for almost a month. I am so proud to be launching this new story. I hope that the readers of Nifty will enjoy this story. I am always open for new ideas suggestions or criticism. So Please Please let me know what you think of this first installment. I want honest opinions here!! E-mail me at frnceso@hotmail.com For those of you who don't know my other stories here they are. Twist and Turns series that includes: 1. Twist and Turns 2. From out of the Ashes 3. As the Last Stone Falls Rude Awakening (Continuation of the Twist and Turns series) Begin Anew (Final installation of the Twist and Turns saga.) Moving Forward And now Lone Ranger or Zorro So If you are new to my stories please feel free to check out the rest. And let me know what you think!