Date: Tue, 26 Feb 2002 21:42:44 +0000
From: James
Subject: Boy Bands - On The Streets - Part 24

Ok, I don't know the BSB nor do I make any suggestions about the way they
live their lives, for instance whether or not they prefer men or woman as
their sexual partners. Frankly, I really don't care if you don't like
reading my story, but if you are offended by the sort of relationship which
is implied by its appearance on a gay site, then please don't read on. Also,
you shouldn't read this if you are under 18, though I think that is a really
stupid rule as it's not like we can tell whether you're 18 or not can we?

I am English, so if you don't understand anything in this story, then tough,
we invented the language first and you nicked it, so it's not our fault,
lol. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this chapter, I'm sorry if the
cliffhangers are getting boring, but once again, my story, so there.

On The Streets - Chapter 24

***Kevin's Point Of View***

	It's been two hours. I don't know what to do. I've been sitting in this
damn waiting room for two hours. Some nurse came over about half an hour ago
to ask me to fill in some forms which I did, to the best of my ability, but
I realised there were still a lot of things about Jared I didn't know - had
he had any prior operations? Did he have any allergies? A doctor came out,
and said that Jared was still under observation, they were trying to work on
him without causing any further damage. That damn metal fence hit him flat
on the head, and then the truck carried on going! It broad sided him, and by
the time I reached him, his arm was bent badly in a direction I didn't think
was possible, and he had blood gushing from a bad cut in his head. When I
looked down and saw that blood I was almost sick. I collapsed by him and
just held him. Thank god the dick who had been driving the truck realised
what had happened - he was the one who phoned the ambulance, and he was now
waiting across the waiting room with me. He had been on the phone to his
employer trying to explain what happened and sort out Jared's medical
expenses. I should have just paid them then and there, it would have been
easier. I'd only let him have the best, God I'd give anything to have him
back, please God, please bring him back to me.

	"Mr. Richardson?" A young doctor stood to my left. He gulped when I looked
up at him. He looked worried and nervous.

	"What? What's happened to Jared?"

	"Err...nothing sir. There's nothing wrong with Mr. Healey, well aside from
the obvious, but we think he might wake up soon. We should warn you there
has been some degree of concussion. He was very lucky not to get a
haemorrhage, and his arm is broken in two places. From what we can tell,
that was due to the hit from the truck itself. There's also some scarring
across the abdominal region due to the fence falling on him." The young man
paused, and took a deep breath. He had said that so quick I'd only just
about picked up what each of Jared's injuries were. I nodded and followed
the man down the hall to the ICU. Once there, the doctor, whose name I found
out was Dr. Young (how fitting!) took me to Jared's bed. It was curtained
off. He told me he'd be back soon, and not to be too loud, as Jared was
obviously still recovering. He left me alone outside the curtain. I dreaded
this moment. I peeled back the curtain and stepped inside. I finally raised
my eyes and looked at Jared. I had to take a breath. What once had been so
beautiful now appeared to be only the remains of that: his face was badly
bruised, his arm was in a cast of some sort, and the other was strapped to
his side. His head was bandaged, as was his midsection, though that was
partly covered by the blankets of the hospital bed. His broad shoulders were
still exposed, they were bruised and cut too. The top of his muscular chest,
which I loved to sleep with my head on at night was bruised a purple and
blue colour. I could hardly stand to look at Jared, and then I suddenly felt
so guilty. Was I really that superficial? I didn't fall in love with Jared
for the way he looks, I fell in love with him for who he is. But Jared is
well...Jared, what I'm looking at is him as well, it's not just who's inside
is it? I felt so guilty for saying I couldn't look at him, this is part of
who he is. I have to accept what he looks like, and besides, he'll be back
to how he looked in no time. I must sound terrible, but unless you've seen
this, you can't understand. Unless you've seen the face of your loved one
totally changed and mutilated into something you can scarcely recognise, and
can hardly call attractive, then you can never know what this feels like.
Then I heard him. He was still asleep, but he was moaning quite a lot. Then
he suddenly sat almost bolt upright and shouted out:

	"No!" And then the pain from his middle struck him and he moaned again as
he laid on the bed and tried to grab his middle, his head and his face all
at the same time. He'd twisted somehow so that he was in a foetal position.
It was at that moment I knew that I still loved Jared, no matter what he
looked like, as the pain he felt shot through me too. I rushed over to his
side, and as his tears trickled down his cheeks and as he sobbed through the
wall of pain he must have been feeling, it was like knives through my heart,
to see my love in so much pain. I held him as much as I could. The straps
and wires going into him and the IV tube going into his arm prevented me
from holding him as close as I wanted to. The pulse monitor must have come
loose or something, because the next thing I realised, the machine by his
bed had flatlined, and there was the sound of a nurse down the hall shouting
and footsteps advancing towards this room.

	"Please Sir, move out the way, we need to treat the patient."

	"No, you don't understand!"

	"Please Sir MOVE!" She was forceful, and although I was angry that she
pushed me away when Jared had only just woken up, I was thankful that the
hospital had such good staff. Upon realising that Jared was awake, and it
was just the pulse monitor which had come loose, the three nurses, and the
doctor who had come running in retreated out of the room and left Jared and
me in there. I was sat on the chair next to his bed. Jared turned his head
to the side stiffly and looked straight at me. The bruise on his left cheek
looked very painful and he had a cut lip which had swollen badly.

	"Kevin?" He asked uncertainly. "Is that you?" Jared was blinking
repeatedly, and squinting his eyes.

	"Yeah Jared, it's me. What's the matter?"

	"What besides the fact I ache everywhere?" He managed a shaky smile. "I
take it the truck didn't stop after it hit the fence?" I shook my head.
"Kevin?"

	"What?"

	"I just asked you a question, did the truck not stop?" Ok, something weird
going on.

	"I shook my head, no it didn't stop. It hit you on the side, that's how you
broke your arm, and your middle is probably hurting because the fence landed
there and scratched it up pretty bad. I'm sorry Jared."

	"What for?" He looked over at me, but his eyes didn't seem to focus on me.

	"For not getting to you sooner, I was so scared Jared, there was a lot of
blood on the ground, and you looked really beaten up. I was scared." I felt
his hand slip into mine, and he squeezed tightly.

	"It's ok Kevin, I'm here now. Aah." Jared let out a little whimper as he
turned his head away.

	"Jared?" I asked, uncertain what was wrong, dammit, this was killing me not
knowing how to help.

	"I'm okay Kevin, I just turned my midsection a bit wrongly and it hurt.
Could you get someone in here to look at my eyes though, I think something
might be in them or something, I can't seem to focus." Jared was facing away
from me now. "I could barely even tell it was you when you walked in the
room." I looked up at him, and nodded, then I realised he probably couldn't
see that. I stood up and leant over him, and kissed him on the forehead, the
one part of his face without any bruises. I went outside and got a doctor. I
couldn't believe how bright everything seemed. Jared was okay. I can't
describe the feeling I had when Jared had opened his eyes. Even if it was
just to scream. Wait, why was he screaming. I stood still in the hallway for
a moment, realising that he had actually sat up and started screaming. Why
was that? Just then Doctor Young walked past.

	"Err...Mr. Richardson? Is there a problem?" He asked.

	"Ummm, yeah, sorry, errr... Jared, he says that he's having trouble
focusing. Do you think you could have a look at his eyes for him?"

	"Certainly. Shall we?" He said with a motion of his arm. He didn't seem so
nervous anymore.

	"Um, you go ahead. I'm just gonna get a drink from the waiting room." The
young doctor nodded and walked in the direction of Jared's room. I made my
way back to the waiting room. Just as I walked in, the opposite door swung
open and in walked Nick and Brian. "Whoa! What are you guys doing here?"

	"Well we came initially to see if you were alright. There are news reports
saying you came to the hospital in an ambulance, but we found out downstairs
that it was Jared, so now we've come to see how he is. What happened?" Brian
related to me.

	"Jared got hit by a fence that was knocked over by a construction lorry and
then the damn thing carried on and hit him. He's okay, well, as well as can
be expected, but he's still in Intensive Care. The Doc's giving him another
checkover now, he was saying something about his eyes not focusing."

	"Oh my God that's terrible, I hope he's ok." Nick started. "Err...Kevin?" I
looked up at Nick. He was pointing behind me, so I turned and saw Doctor
Young standing there trying to get my attention.

	"Ah, Mr. Richardson, Jared said he was tired, and to tell you what was
wrong as he wanted to go to sleep. Is that ok?" I nodded. "It appears that
Jared has developed acute myopia, um, short-sightedness. This is probably
due to his concussion, and may be temporary, but injuries of this type can
cause permanent eyesight afflictions. He may need some form of visual aid,
glasses or contact lenses, depending on the severity of the injury. I would
suggest that he see the hospital ophthalmologist as soon as possible, when
he is able to." I thanked the doctor and he carried on past me through the
doors Nick and Brian had entered.

	"So, I'm on the news am I?"

	"Yeah, some reporter must have seen you getting off the ambulance, and
thought she would get a story." Brian said with a sympathetic tone to his
voice. I nodded to him.

	"So, where's A.J. and Howie?"

	"A.J.'s in New York, and Howie's in Miami. Howie just phoned and said he'd
seen the news and he'd be up soon. I guess A.J. hasn't heard yet, unless
Howie told him." Nick said.

	"Well, first things first, you can phone them up and tell them they don't
need to come. Then you can go home, we're not supposed to be together
remember?" I said with a smile on my lips trying to take away the brunt of
the harsh words.

	"NO!" They both shouted back.

	"Kevin, Jared is our friend too, we're not just gonna leave him. We want to
see him too. Forget that stupid fucking rule for once, Jared is hurt, and we
want to be there with him." Brian started. I let out a sigh, this was one
battle I wasn't gonna win.

	"Fine. He's in ICU 3. You can go in and see him I guess, but I should warn
you, he's pretty beat up." I went and got my coffee. They were gone when I
turned round, I felt so empty just then. They had known Jared for what, two
months? And already he meant so much to them. I wondered if I meant that
much after two months with the band, and now that I'd known them for ten
years, did they like me even more. Did they even like me? Sometimes they
acted so bored when I was around, like I was the one to always stop their
fun. I walked along to Jared's room, sipping on the hot coffee. I stood just
outside the room for a minute, I could hear talking from inside, I heard
Jared's voice, and a chuckle coming from his throat. God, I loved that
laugh.

	"Kevin?" I heard him shout from inside. I flicked my head around. How had
he known I was there? I walked inside slowly, and saw three pairs of eyes on
me. "Kevin, come and sit with us." Jared said.

	"Why didn't you want to hear what the doctor had to tell you?" I said as I
sat on the chair closest to Jared's head.

	"I don't like doctors much. For that matter, I don't like hospitals much.
I'd really like to get out of here. But I was sick of it, I didn't want to
hear anymore from him, so I just told him to tell you what was wrong, and
you could tell me later." Jared grinned up at me. He was being lazy, great.
"Anyway, I was just telling the guys I'm feeling better. I don't know what
this stuff is in my arm, but it's making me feel just wonderful." He had a
goofy expression on his face, and I couldn't help but laugh as he looked
like he was high on something. "Then, I was gonna tell the guys to go get
something to eat, or at least disappear for a bit, cos I need to talk to
you." His voice had an ominous sound to it, and I didn't like it. The guys'
heads shot up and they looked at each other, then back at us. First Nick,
then Brian nodded and stood up and headed back in the direction of the
waiting room down the hall. I watched them leave, then turned back to Jared.
"Can you shut the door?" He said barely loud enough for me to hear. I got up
and walked over to the door, and swung it shut.

	"What's wrong Jared?" I asked as I sat down again.

	"When I said I didn't like hospitals, I wasn't exaggerating." I nodded, and
waited for him to elaborate. "Being in a hospital brings back a lot of bad
memories." I was hoping he was going to elaborate further, and I guess the
look of expectation on my face told him this. "Oh God, I really don't want
to go into this. But, I guess you're gonna find out sooner or later." Jared
shut his eyes, and took a couple of deep breaths. I could see they were
laboured slightly. "Kevin, I've only been in a hospital twice before, well,
except for when I was very young. But the point is, the last two times were
because of things that happened to me. Things I wish hadn't happened. The
first one you know about: when Jon was killed by that homophobic bastard for
speaking out on gay rights. I spent two hours waiting in a hospital for him,
but he never came out the operating room." He sank back further into the bed
and took a deep breath. "Kevin, the other time is almost as painful as that,
and I know it's gonna make you feel differently about me. I really don't
want to have to tell you this, but I feel like I have to. And please, once
I'm done, don't feel bad about just walking out of here. I'll understand."
Before I had a chance to say I'd never leave him, he held his hand up to
tell me to stay quiet and he carried on talking. "Kevin two years ago, I was
working in London, same as when we first met, it might have even been the
same place where you picked me up. Kevin, I was raped. Four, maybe five guys
started shouting at me and swearing me while I was just standing in
Piccadilly, soon enough though they started hitting me and kicking me, and
they dragged me into an alley and took turns fucking me. I was in such a
shit state I couldn't even get up after they were done. I was lucky somebody
came along and called for an ambulance. I spent the next two weeks in
hospital recovering, I was lucky that none of them passed anything on to me.
Who knows what they could have had." Jared paused. I held my breath should I
have said something? "Go on then." Jared turned away from me to the opposite
wall.

	"What?"

	"Go! I know you don't want to be here anymore with me, you thought you were
going out with something good, but really you were just dating shit. You
deserve so much more Kevin, please just go." I saw a tear fall down his
face, and he brought his good arm up to try and wipe it away, but I got
there first, and I rested my hand on the side of his face.

	"Jared, I don't want to go. You haven't given me any reason to go. I love
you Jared, just because something happened to you in your past that you
couldn't control, it doesn't mean that you aren't worth loving. And I do
love you Jared, more than you'll ever know. You mean everything to me."
Jared turned his head back towards me, and took my hand in his.

	"God, I wish I could see you properly again." He smiled and shut his eyes.
It had taken a lot out of him, telling me all that. And he quietly settled
back into sleep, his hand gradually relaxing its hold on mine. I stood up
after about five minutes, and left the room. My head was spinning with all
this new stuff about Jared. Was this what he had wanted me to know about
before we made any sort of fixed commitment? I love Jared so much, and there
are no 'buts' or 'becauses', I love Jared plain and simple, I love him
completely and utterly, and I want to spend my life with him. Hearing that
he was raped made me angry, but it also made me realise that I love Jared
even more than I first thought: I don't care if he has a past, I don't care
what happened to him in the past, as long as it doesn't make him unhappy
now, I am obviously upset that he was hurt so badly in the past, but as long
he is with me now, and as long as he is happy, I don't care.

	"Kevin?" I heard a voice ask from over my shoulder. Standing there I saw
Lance Bass. What was he doing here?

	"Lance?"

	"Hey man, we saw the news, we thought you were hurt?" Lance asked with a
note of confusion in his voice.

	"No, it was Jared." I answered, perhaps a little curtly, but I was kinda
confused why they were here?

	"Oh man, is he okay?" I nodded.

	"Just sleeping."

	"Ok, good, we came to see that you were ok. Well Justin, Chris and I did."
I gave him a confused look, but he carried on. "We were all worried that you
might be hurt." I'd never have guessed that if I had been hurt all these
guys would have come running.

	"Ummm, well, thanks. But as I said, it was Jared who was hurt. A fence fell
on him and a truck hit him. He's got a concussion, and a broken arm, and
he's beat up pretty bad."

	"Oh man, that's rough." Lance said with a grimace on his face.

	"Yeah, well he's okay, he's just a bit shook up." Just then, Justin and
Britney, and Chris came round the corner from one direction and Brian and
Nick came from the other. I started to realise something then: although all
these people were concerned about how Jared was, they had come initially
because they thought I was hurt. Maybe I wasn't as alone as I thought
sometimes.

	It was only about 5 pm by this time, but my stomach was aching for
something to eat, so I said I was gonna go to the cafeteria. Just then Brian
sat next to me as I was munching on my sandwich and he just sat there
looking at me.

	"What's wrong Kevin? Is something wrong with Jared?" I thought to myself,
what besides the obvious hospitalisation? I think Brian saw the smirk on my
face at his stupid question and he continued. "Well besides the obvious...or
is there anything else wrong?" He looked at me with inquisitive eyes.

	"No Brian, nothing's wrong. Well actually, I was thinking. I'm cancelling
the rule. I like having you guys around, if we want to see each other now,
we can. It doesn't matter."

	"I was actually thinking the same thing. Good one Kev." Brian stood up and
left me to my sandwich in peace. About half an hour later, I went back up to
the waiting room. I saw all the people who had come to visit sitting around
on the hospital chairs. There was Nick who had spread himself over a couple
of chairs and was reading a magazine, there was Brian who had book in his
hands, and had his feet up on a chair opposite. Lance was sitting there
biting his nails. I almost went over and knocked them out of his mouth.
Britney had a six month old copy of some magazine in her hands and she was
flicking through randomly. Justin had a magazine too on his lap. Then I
noticed Justin was wearing glasses.

	"Justin?" He looked up at me. "Would you mind if I just borrow your glasses
for a second?" He looked at me with a confused expression on his face, but
he peeled the glasses off and handed them to me. I thanked him and walked
back towards Jared's room. I saw him taking a drink of water, and as he laid
back on the bed, he noticed me standing in the doorway. He was still
beautiful, I realise that now, no matter how beat up he looked, he was still
stunning to me.

	"Kevin?"

	"Hey Jared, how are your eyes?"

	"Still blurry, I can't get into focus, it's really pissing me off."

	"Here try these." I slipped Justin's glasses onto Jared's face.

	"Wow. That's a bit better, where'd you get these from?"

	"Justin had them."

	"Justin? Justin Timberlake?" I nodded. He could see the movement in my head
through these glasses. I was relieved that it wasn't more serious. Just then
there was a knock at the door.

	"Hey Jared." It was Lance, Chris, Justin and Britney.

	"Hey! I got the complete visitors' package." Jared grinned. It was good to
see him happy again. The four visitors all walked in, and shortly after
them, Nick and Brian came in. They all sat down around Jared, and he cast a
suspicious eye over them. "How did you know I was here?"

	"We saw it on the news." Lance piped in before anyone else could answer.

	"Why would I be on the news?" Jared asked.

	"Well actually, the news reported it was Kevin who was injured." Chris
clamped his hand over Lance's mouth, but it was too late. Jared looked
around at the people, and I wasn't sure if he was upset that they hadn't
come to see him, but then he started laughing, and I was glad he was okay
with the muddle.

	"Well, as you can see he's fine." Jared's words were punctuated with
giggles, and it was quite cute to hear him laughing like that. "If you want
to go, you can." He said, and suddenly the laughter in the room stopped.

	"But, we...we don't want to go." Britney answered. I looked over at Jared
who looked up at me. I shrugged, and he just looked back at the people
crowded around. "We've known that it wasn't Kevin that was hurt for the past
half hour or so, but we're still here aren't we?" She reached over and
rubbed Jared's hand. "We're concerned about you too Jared, are you sure
you're ok?" Jared nodded his head. Britney sat back against Justin, who
occupied the seat she was in with her. I just stood there, looking at all
the people in the room with us. 'All these people had come to see if I was
ok' I thought with exhilaration. They had actually come to check that I was
alright. Now they were all here for Jared though. I started feeling how I
had felt at Justin and Britney's wedding: I was jealous, I wanted Jared
back. This was supposed to be our time together, no-one else was supposed to
be butting in. I actually started planning: how could I get these people
out, so that I could spend some time in here alone with Jared. I looked over
at him. I leant on the headboard of the bed and bent my head down to his, so
that I could kiss him on the cheek. I heard a few 'aaahs' and 'awwws' coming
from behind me but I didn't care. I love this guy so much, I can't think
about anything else. He's driving me nuts. I know he is.

End of Chapter 24...
To Be Continued...