Date: Sat, 7 Jan 2006 20:58:32 +0000
From: Mike Rich <gridlinked@gmail.com>
Subject: Paranoia Chapter 9

Disclaimer:

The following story contains sexual content and deals with homosexual
relationships.
It is not for people under the legal age.
If you are offended by the contents of this story, or it is illegal in your
location to view this type of material, leave now.
This story is fiction and is not intended to imply anything about the true
sexuality of the celebrities mentioned or any personal knowledge about
their private lives.

Any comments can be send to gridlinked@gmail.com

I would like to thank Rich, for making me plunge deeper in the life of
Andrew Archer.



Chapter 9



He woke up fling dizzy and very hot. He felt someone trying to shove him
from his dreamless sleep, and it was getting annoying. He couldn't
understand, still with his eyes closed and refusing to cooperate with who
ever was trying to wake him, why he was so hot, and so dizzy for that
matter. He tried to rearrange the thoughts in his head, but at that moment,
it didn't feel like his head, it felt more like he borrowed it from someone
else.  Slowly he tried to open his eyes, only to shut them up again when he
sensed the light that was coming from somewhere very near. Then he
remembered.  The window.  He knew what had happen, now a more important
question was clouding his mind. Who was waking him up?

'Please don't let it be Kevin, please don't let it be Kevin...'

He turned around, and listened to the voice. He felt relieved. Again he
tried to open his eyes, and this time he was successful. A blurry looking
Alicia was standing over him looking concerned.  He knew she would have
questions, and with the way he was feeling, he only wanted her to go away.

"Andrew? Andrew, what happened?" He could tell that she was worried. He
tried to answer her right away but his voice refused to cooperate. After a
few moments he tried again.

"Hum... i... kinda... slept here."

"Yes sweetie i can see that, i mean, why did you?"

"Ally... can we talk... later, i need a shower." He said trying to get up
from the floor.

"OK, but we are definitely talking later." He heard her say with a tone of
finality.

"Fine!" With her help he managed to get up without too much problem though
the dizziness still persisted.  He left Alicia behind and went into the
bathroom. He started the water on the bathtub and started taking of his
clothes. Wile he was taking of his shirt, he got a glimpse of himself in
the mirror. 'Definitely not me!' he thought. The bath was exactly what he
needed, the warm water helped him relax until the dizziness went away
completely. He still didn't understand how he could have slept all night in
that position.

He remembered one time when he was 8, Mathew was being his usual pissy
self, at least at that time, he was still young to fatherhood and he was
freaking out most of the time, Andrew that had been used to the full
attention of his brother, had now, to fight for his attention with a
baby. That day things got a little out of hand and Tommy ended up getting
hurt. Andrew was certain that his parents were going to lash out at him,
but to his surprise, at least surprise at that time, Mathew's hand
connected with his face for the first time ever, and what would be the last
time. That was the turning point, Andrew realized now, when his love for
his brother died a little. Even though he knew that it was his fault that
Tommy was hurt, that day he cried himself to sleep on his bedroom floor,
knowing that there was someone, after all, that his brother loved more than
him.

He now understood of course, after all he was now a father too. So he knew
that Mathew would only want whats best for Tommy, unfortunately, Mathew
must have underestimated his sons will power. There was no way he would be
the first to call.

The bathroom was by now filled with vapor, and Andrew was beyond
relaxed. He started emptying the tub wile he got out. There was that mirror
again.

'OK, one more time.'

There he was, the old Andrew he knew and loved, a bit narcissist he knew
but at that point he couldn't care less.  Now the only thing missing was
finding out, why he felt so afraid of committing himself to Kevin.  Yes,
that was the question, i mean apart from the fact that they were in the
middle of a fight, if he could call it that, he knew that they would be
good together. And he knew, by the way that Kevin looked at him, that the
man really liked him, so what was the problem?  Unfortunately the mirror
had no answers.

He dried himself and got back to his room. He looked around expecting to
see Alicia, expecting to be bombarded with questions, to his surprise the
relentless woman, had given up waiting.

'Not bad, Buddha, not bad at all.'

He went to his suitcase and opened it. After a few minutes he had clothes
picked out to wear for the day.  A light green shirt and some faded blue
jeans. Simple.  He dressed quickly, now the only thing he wanted was to see
his son.  He got out of the room and into the hallway. He thought of seeing
if Kevin was still in his room, but quickly changed his mind. He was
probably still mad, and Andrew didn't think he could take Cold Kevin today.
Unfortunately for him, that wouldn't be an option.

He saw his son, on the arms of his loving mother. Alicia sat there on the
Kitchen table, holding Ben, seating in front of Kevin.

'Cold Kevin.'

"Good morning." Andrew managed to say while he walked over to his ex
wife. He bent over and kissed Ben on top of his head. His son just giggled
and took his arms out to ask for a hug. Andrew couldn't resist. He took Ben
from Alicia and sat beside her on the Kitchen table.

"So how are you?" Alicia asked him after Kevin decided to remain quiet.

"I'm good thanks, i took a warm bath, it was very relaxing." He said still
looking at his son seated on his lap.

Kevin still sat there, saying nothing. Andrew knew he was still mad, but he
also knew that he wasn't about to say sorry anytime soon.

'Even though it was your fault.' He thought.

Never the less, he was in no mood for apologies, after all, if it had been
reversed, he would have understood.  After a few minutes he couldn't take
it anymore. The tension was just too much, and frankly he just had to get
out of there.  He got up and looked one last time to Alicia who just looked
back at him with a questioning gaze.  Without so much as another word, he
turned, still holding his son, and left the Kitchen, leaving a confused
Kevin to deal with very upset Alicia.




"What do you think you're doing?" Alicia asked right after Andrew had left
the Kitchen.

Kevin just looked at her for a few seconds surprised by the upset woman in
front of him. "What do you mean?"

"Did you see how he was? And you just sat there and said nothing, not even
good morning!"

"How is this my fault? He was the one that just dismissed me yesterday?"
Kevin was starting to get upset.

"First of all, don't raise your voice to me, it does very little, second of
all, we all have bad days, your job as a friend, is to put up with them and
be happy with the knowledge that he will put up with yours."

For a few moments there was silence. Alicia knew she was right, Andrew was
rarely like he had been yesterday, and she knew that it took a lot to upset
him.

"Look" She started once again, not letting Kevin speak "You don't know
Andrew as well as i do, he can be very proud, but he is one of the most
patient people i know, and if he was upset yesterday, i can tell you he had
good reason. Today i found him sleeping on the floor in the fetal position"
until this point Kevin had been looking at his hands fidgeting on top of
the kitchen table, but he quickly looked up to Alicia with a alarming gaze
"Yes, in the fetal position, so i can tell you, whatever is bothering him,
its not that easy. So i suggest that you stop being an ass, and be the
friend that you told him you were going to be." With that Alicia stood up
and left Kevin to his thoughts.




Andrew was standing on the patio that gave him access to the grounds on the
back of the house. He had been right the night before, there was in fact a
lake.  The big lake was surrounded by trees on almost all of its
perimeter. Right in front of the house, depending on the perspective, there
was this small wooden pier, with a small rowboat tied to it.  The view was
gorgeous, the most impressive thing was the tranquility it transpired. Ben
was resting in his arms content on being that way. He had stopped giggling
for awhile now, and just looked at the lake with his father.

A few moments later he heard someone sliding the door that led to the
patio.

"Hey" he heard Kevin say meekly.

"Hey!" He said back, wile Ben moved a bit in his arms to get a better look
at the tall singer.

"I'm so sorry Andy, i am. Yesterday i just felt like second plan, and... i
guess i was just scared that you were getting second thoughts about the
possibility... i... i don't know what to say." Kevin was beside him,
looking at the lake. No sound could be heard for miles, this time there
were no New York lights, there were no car crashes, there were no people
screaming and there was no angry manager, all there was, was tranquility.
And it was that tranquility that made up his mind. He had been wrong, he
was the one that had dismissed him, the one too scared to jump blindly once
more for fear of another failed relationship. And even though his fear
might have been justified, he had now hurt the one he...

"I love you."

The words had a power of their own. They flew out of his mouth and seemed
to be heard from the patio to the lake, where they took a stand, got on the
boat and sailed to Kevin.  Andrew was still looking forward, afraid of
Kevin's reaction. He had told him that he wanted a relationship, but love?
The silence just kept on going and Andrew was losing his mind, finally he
took one last look at the sun reflected on the peaceful water and turned to
Kevin.  There he was, tall dark, handsome and shedding a tear.

"Kev? Everything OK? Look, if its too much we..." But he was interrupted by
the man. Kevin gently stretched his arm and put a finger on Andrew's lips
to stop the smaller man from talking. Gently he got closer and took Ben
from his father. Andrew just stood there, transfixed, waiting too see what
the singer might do.  Kevin put Ben in one of the lounge chairs and turned
once more to Andrew. This time he got as close as he could, grabbed his
man, and without a second of hesitation, kissed him.

At that moment Andrew knew the answer. Kevin was gentle and passionate all
together. He put his hands on Andrew's back and pulled the man impossibly
close. At that moment they were one.

When they finally came up for air they could hear giggling. Both turned to
see Ben giggling at what was to him a funny site. Andrew smiled and turned
to Kevin still waiting for words.  His love must have sensed it.

"I love you so much Andy." Kevin said refusing to let his man go anytime
soon. "I thought that you didn't want to rush things so i dint want to say
anything. I know its been little time and i know..."

"Kev? Kevin?" Andrew called interrupting Kevin's line of thought. "Forget
it. You know, i was being someone i am not. I mean i am worried, yes,
mostly because of Ben, but the thing is, not one good thing in my life was
thought through, it was mostly just instinct. Including my son. I mean, if
i had stopped to think, i wouldn't have him now, and that isn't a
possibility i even want to consider. So just forget it. I love you, the
rest will fill itself."

Kevin couldn't help grin widely. "Soooo, you're my boyfriend?"

"I suppose so, yes!"

At that moment they heard the front doorbell ring. They didn't care, they
were lost in each other.

"So, finally a couple are we?"

They turned to see Nick on the patio doorway with Alicia, both grinning at
them.  Andrew was the first to speak.

"Looks like it Nicky" turning to Kevin he said it one more time "it sure
looks like it."




He had been crying almost all night, he must have slept a total of an hour.
First he was upset about the call.  The call from his ex boyfriend. His
best friend. He had broken his trust.  He just wished he could still get it
back.  Rick looked through the window of his hotel room. New York was still
New York.  Then had come the other call. He actually didn't know what was
worse, his ex boyfriend, the man he loved, calling him to say that he
sucked, or the mother of another ex boyfriend calling in tears saying her
son had died.  Another tear fell down his cheek, and New York was still New
York.

Will was dead.

'What now?'



Sorry its a short chapter, but this is where it had to end. Hopefully
you're liking where this is going.

Any comments can be send to gridlinked@gmail.com

All the best

Mike