Date: Fri, 30 Jun 2000 12:21:54 EDT
From: Papito6187@aol.com
Subject: Rob & Lance 50, the final chapter

Well all . . . this is it . . . the final chapter! Before I get on with it,
I'd like to take the time out to thank a couple of people. First off, three
people that have become some of my best friends, Michael of Lance and
Michael, Dave the other half of Vamps, and my mystery writer! You three
have been there for me and I have come to call each of you brother. Thanks
go out to all of the readers that took the time out to email me or IM me
and let me know what they thought of the story. A special thanks to those
whose lives this story has helped (Frank, and any others). Also to all of
my fellow authors who I've ever helped in the past, DC Kev, Lauren, Phil,
Alfred, and any other writer who I've helped but since I have a really bad
memory and am extremely bad with names, don't think I'm not grateful to
you. The last thanks goes out to any and everyone who has ever read this
story, although I never wrote to please the readers, you guys have made
this experience even better for me. So, without any further ado, for the
last time . . . ON WITH THE SHOW!!!


Last time . . .

"What the hell just happened here!?" Lance yelled as I hung up the phone
and threw it across the room onto a couch, just in time for Justin and Joey
to walk in.

"That was the end of my friendship with Jay!" I yelled turning my back to
everyone and crossing my arms over my chest.

"What do you mean the end of your friendship with Jay?!" Justin asked
walking towards me.


This time . . .


"What part don't you get?!" I said still pissed off.

"Is this about our break-up?!"

"It's the same reason that caused your break-up!" I said calming down a
little bit, but still angry.

"What happened? What's all the yelling about?!" Josh said, completing the
group.

"Rob and Jay broke up!" Chris said.

"Um . . . huh?"

"Jay and I are no longer friends." I said smiling at Chris' attempt to
lighten the mood.

"Um . . . why?"

"He wants to pretend to be someone he's not, and by doing so he's insulting
me and showing that he couldn't give a fuck about me."


"What happened?!" Lance asked, getting impatient.

"He's doing exactly what I thought he was gonna do. He's saying that he was
never really bi, that he's straight."

"Oh! Meaning that everything we had was a load of shit?!" Justin said
getting pissed.

"Basically! But that's not even the half! He knows that he's doing that!
He's doing all this to make his mom happy!"

"But that's no reason to throw away a lifelong friendship!" Josh said
trying to make it seem as if I made a mistake.

"Friendship was hardly what it was! I was there for him but he was never
there for me!"

"How can you say you two weren't friends? The way you acted with each
other!?"

"That was just out of knowing him so well, and having a good time. That
doesn't mean we were friends. I could have a good time with anyone,
provided they wanna have a good time. Put it this way, when I told him
about the plane, he just gasped, asked if I was ok, then moved on and
started bitching about his problems."

"Oh . . ." Josh said seeing the ignorance on Jay's part.

"When my ex broke up with me, I called him to tell him, to find out that he
already knew, then he just went on and started bitching about his
problems."

"What?!" Chris said.

"When I came out to him, he didn't take it well. Which is understandable,
but he came back to me cause he was going through drama, and he needed
someone to bitch about his problems to."

"What?!" Justin and Lance said at the same time.

"So, this was just the last straw. It's been building, and it just took
this to make me realize that it had to end."

"Sorry man!" Joey said, not knowing what else to say.

"Yeah, sorry bro!" Josh seconded.

"He's moving out of the apartment. He didn't sign those papers I gave
him. So . . . that means I don't hafta look for another place in New York
when I move back!"

"You're moving back?!" Lance asked in shock.

"That was always a given . . . I was only gonna stay in Orlando until it
was ok for me to move back."

"Since when?!"

"Since always!"

"And you were planning on telling me this when?"

"One of many things that needed to be talked about but didn't cause I
forgot or was too busy. But most of the other stuff got talked about."

"Like?"

"Can we just talk about this later? I'm kinda not in the mood right
now. I'm just gonna go take a nice, long, hot bath, then get ready for
tonight's show."

"Fine, but we gotta talk later on!"

"Fine, but not now!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!" I said walking towards the bathroom. As soon as I shut the door, I
looked in the mirror, leaned on the sink and stared at myself. "Look at
you!" I said out loud to my reflection. "You look like shit!"

"I feel like shit! I need to slow down!"

-What happened to the guy that used to enjoy doing what he did? You've been
working so hard that it's gone beyond doing what you love, and become a
job! You need to go back to being the real you and enjoy what you have! You
haven't even been appreciating Lance! Lord knows he's been patient enough!
Why are you drowning yourself in your work?

"Cause it's safer that way."

-You're becoming afraid aren't you?

"Of what?"

-Of him!

"Who?"

-Lance!

"NO!"

-Don't lie to me! I am you! You know you are!

"How am I afraid?"

-You're afraid that it won't work out and that you'll break each other's
hearts. You're afraid that people are gonna find out about you two and
think that you slept your way to the top. You've even started to believe
that yourself!

"Well think about it! I basically got this gig cause I started fucking
Lance!"

-No you didn't . . . you know you didn't. If it were that way, Trey
would've gotten a deal!  They saw something in you and invested in it! Not
just the guys, but the record company, the fans, and the media. Sure
. . . you wouldn't have been here now if it weren't for them, but you know
you were gonna get here some day!

"So what do I do now then?"

-Stop being afraid. Live your life at all costs! Take advantage of all you
have! You have the world's attention, what are you gonna do with it?

"That's a good question!"

-Think about it.

"You don't know the answer?"

-If you don't, why would I?

"Good point!"

As I sat there in the tub, having a mental conversation with myself, Jay
didn't even once pop into my mind. I guess it was because it was for the
best . . . on everyone's part. On his cause he regained his mom's
attention, even though it was at his own cost. On Justin's cause it showed
him that he can fall in love, but he doesn't have to rely on someone just
to make him feel loved. On me cause it was a whole lot of things less, that
I had to worry about, all encompassed into one thing, us not being friends.

As I stepped out of the tub, I looked in the mirror and stared deeply into
my reflection, just like I had done before getting in. I now saw something
different, or someone different. That something/someone must have been
obvious, cause as soon as I stepped and saw Lance sitting out there waiting
for me, the first thing he said was,

"Are you okay? You look . . . different somehow . . ."

"I am . . . different . . ."

"Huh?"

"I just spent a long time thinking about things. I feel . . . relieved!"

"You look . . . refreshed."

"I feel refreshed."

"Well, in that case, are you up for talking now?"

"Yeah, but before we do . . . I just wanted to apologize."

"For what? Yellin before? Don't worry about it!"

"Not just that . . . about everything! I've been neglecting you
lately. I've started to take you, to take what we have for granted. This
whole experience has really opened up my eyes. Look, I'm gonna tell you
exactly what I just was thinking to myself. I know now that I was drowning
myself in my work. Part of the reason for that was cause I was scared."

"Of what?"

"About us."

"What about us?"

"The whole 'what if we don't make it', 'what if people find out and think I
slept my way to the top', 'what if people find out and reject me', that
whole thing. But, I'm not afraid anymore . . . at least I don't think so. I
guess I've just realized that if we don't make it, there's no way that we
could end on bad terms, cause we have too much history and our friendship
with the guys wouldn't let us. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying
that we should break up cause its never gonna work out, I'm just saying
that . . ."

"I know what you're saying. It's sort of the same thing I realized when I
said that in this business it's hard to make a relationship work out and
last."

"Exactly!"

"I mean, it's hard! To be in love and in a relationship alone, and have to
worry about your image in the public eye, it's killer! But to be in a
relationship with another guy!? We're lucky we lasted THIS long! Look, just
so you know . . . I don't feel left out in any way. I'm as much apart of
your life as you are a part of mine! We both knew that we'd be busy, and
wouldn't always have time to spend with each other! Hell, the first three
and a half months of our relationship were spent apart!"

"I know, and that was one of the things that scared me."

"How?"

"Well, it was like, since we were apart for that time, it was like we
didn't really get to experience the things that a couple does when they
start out a new relationship. So, because of that, it was like we were
missing out on stuff and . . . I dunno . . ."

"Babe, we both know that this is no ordinary relationship. And like I said,
the fact that we stood together this long just goes to show you how much we
love each other! I mean, I'm not tryin to jinx it, but I guess I've kind of
learned to appreciate what we have now, so that if and when it's gone, I
can't say that it was all for nothing. I guess we've both done a bit of
thinking . . . I guess this near death thing had to happen to sort of wake
both of us up."

"Talk about a rude awakening! Next time remind me to hit the snooze
button!" I said as we both laughed and he pulled me into a hug.

"I love you, I always will . . . whether we're together or not, I'll always
have love for you.  You've helped me realize a lot of things about myself
that I needed to find out."

"Geez . . . we make it sound like we're breaking up!"

"I know . . ."

"Is that what we're doing?"

<KNOCK><KNOCK>

"Lance? You still in here?" Josh said cracking the door, but not looking
in.

"Yeah . . ." Lance said still looking at me. "We're kind of busy though
. . ."

"Johnny just called an emergency meeting . . . We kinda need you . . ."

"I'll be right there." He said sighing.

"Sorry guys . . ."

"We'll finish this later?" Lance said turning towards the door.

"Yeah . . . After the show." I said turning towards the bathroom as the
door to my dressing room and the bathroom closed at the same time.

					*

					*

					*

Well . . . here it is! Today's the day! Today is the day that I perform for
an audience around the world via satellite. The MTV Video Music Awards
. . . I'm up for best dance video for "The one I want", best new artist,
breakthrough performance, and best male something . . . Tonight would help
my career a great amount. Tonight marks a bunch of milestones. My first
awards show where I was nominated for something, I was back in my home town
after about a month, I was moving back into my apartment, which I had
redecorated to give it a new look, and tonight was the last time I'd be
performing with *NSYNC. The tour was over, the album was for the most part
done, they were announcing to the world tonight that they were leaving
TransCon and BMG, and I was taking a month off, then starting out on my own
world tour.

The skit for the show was a school scene. Britney started off first, did
her thing, then after she was done, a bell would ring, and then it was the
guys' turn. The dance routine they did for my remix of "Tearin up my heart"
was off the hook! It was a totally new routine for a totally new version of
the song, they had back-up dancers and all, my back- up dancers. After they
finished their song, it was time for my number followed by the grand
finale. A deep, mechanical type voice said "It's not finished . . ." then
that would lead into a remix of "Gonna get down". It was cool cause I came
down the aisle of the audience and hopped up on stage as the guys joined
Brit's dancers in the chairs to the classroom set. My song would finish, a
drum beat would be heard, then I would say,

"ONE, TWO, THREE . . . BREAKDOWN!"

Followed by the guys, Brit and her dancers to come back out for the grand
finale, which was a dance number incorporating all of us on the stage to
another track that I had made.

Rehearsals for the whole number were a bitch! Because of all the intricate
choreography, we had to practice the whole thing on stage about 3 times. We
were all gonna hang out afterwards, but Brit had to go with that Serena
chick from MTV News to go shopping for an outfit, to be aired on MTV News
1515, VMA Edition, I had a radio interview with Z100, and the guys had to
go pick out their outfits.

After the interview, I just went back to my apartment to read some fan
mail. Joey had called asking if I wanted to go clubbing, but I called him
back and told him no. I was too tired from all the rehearsing to go out
dancing all night. I had fallen asleep on the couch with a letter from some
guy who wanted me to give some advice about making it into the business,
when I heard a knock at my door. At first I didn't hear it, I just thought
it was apart of my dream, but as it got stronger, it woke me from my
sleep. I opened the door and to my surprise, it was Lance.

"Hey!" I said rubbing my eyes.

"Hey . . . did I disturb you?" He asked hoping he didn't.

"No, I had to wake up anyway . . . I just fell asleep reading some fan
mail."

"Oh . . . I can go if you want . . ."

"No, come on in!" I said as he stepped inside. "What's up?"

"Just stoppin by . . . thought I'd see how you were doin!"

"I'm glad you did actually . . . I wanted to talk to you."

"Yeah . . . me too . . ."

"Oh . . . you go first!"

"Nah, that's ok . . . you can go!"

"Come on Lance . . . go . . ."

"Fine . . ." He said as we both took a seat on the couch.

"What's up?"

"Well . . . this is just the last time we're gonna be performing together
. . ."

"Just for awhile . . . you know we're gonna perform again!"

"Well . . . with you going off on your solo tour, I guess I just wanted to
say . . . I'm gonna miss you!"

"I'll miss you too! I'm gonna miss all of you guys! These past seven months
have been the best and worst of my life! I wouldn't trade them in for
anything in the world! I owe you guys a lot in getting me here and keeping
me sane! You more than the rest of them, but all equally in my heart."

"That's another thing . . . where do we stand? I mean, I know we agreed to
separate once you went on your tour, but . . . it's just gonna be hard!
Especially now with the whole Lou thing coming out, there's probably gonna
be some legal action taken, and it's gonna be really stressful!"

"I know, I know . . . but, you know I'll be here for all of you . . . I'm
gonna be just a phone call away! And if you guys think you're close now,
you're gonna be even closer after this whole thing blows over!"

"I know . . . And I know that the guys feel the same way, but I just feel
stronger about it cause . . ."

"Well yeah . . . that's a given! We've gone this long with establishing a
friendship without the romance . . . This last month was really hard on
both of us, but I think we've managed to start up a good enough friendship
to have it last without the awkwardness."

"Well, it's always gonna be a little awkward, if we act like everything is
just fine between us, we'd both be lying to ourselves."

"What I mean is that we don't hate each other, so we're gonna be able to
actually HAVE a relationship. And that really means a lot to me considering
my last break up."

"Mine too . . ."

"The worst thing is that we're gonna always have feelings for each other
. . . I mean, not that it's bad that I have feelings for you, just that
that if anything is what would make it a little awkward."

"Yeah . . ."

"Yeah . . ."

We sat there for a second and stared in each other's eyes. It was like a
scene out of a movie, we slowly moved in and started to kiss. The kiss was
one that would last forever, but deliver the final goodbye. We sat there
for a few minutes, making out; it was a good feeling, and it was broken
apart when the time was right. Lance's cell rang, it was Johnny, he had to
go meet with him and the guys to talk about the label jump. As he got up
from the couch, I walked him to the door. We stood there momentarily, and
he grabbed me into a hug. Our last embrace as a couple, our first as just
friends.

						*

						*

						*

						*

						*

"And that of course, was right around when you came in to the picture. I
told you it was a long story! Psh . . . and I even left out some parts too!
But the parts I did were just some minor stuff." I said leaning back in my
chair. "I still remember that day that mom told me she was going do adopt a
child! I was in France on my world tour, and I called her on my day off,
cause she had been leaving me a few messages, telling me that she had to
speak to me. Didn't she tell you this story?" I asked.

"Yeah, but tell me again, I like it better when you tell it." Cynthia, my
adopted sister, said lying in her bed.

"Well, if you already know then . . ."

"Rob, humor me! I'm dying!" She said laughing.

"Th . . . that's not funny." I said realizing that she was right.

"Rob, we all knew it would happen! I've been having relapses for months
now! It was only a matter of time before the cancer caught up with me!"

"Yeah, but you were doing so well!"

"Rob, I'm dying. You know it, and I know it! I've come to accept it, and so
should you!"

"But . . . I'm gonna miss you!"

"I know. But don't worry, I'll be with you always!"

"I love you Cyn!" I said hugging her, as the tears flowed down my cheeks.

"I love you too, bro! Now enough of this mushy shit! Finish telling me the
story!"

"Fine, fine!" I said letting out a sniff and wiping my eyes. "I can do
this!"

"You know I just wanna hear your voice!"

"Yeah, and making me tell you about everything before you came in is making
me lose my voice!" I said chuckling, trying to get my mind off the
inevitable. "Ok, so where was I?"

"The day mom told you."

"Oh yeah! I was on my world tour, in France."

"Yeah, you said that already!"

"So I asked mom what was so important. She asked me how everything was, and
as I was telling her, I asked her again, why she had to speak to me so
badly. And that's when she told me, she said,

-- Well, your father and I have been talking. And ever since you and Ricky
both moved out of the house, we always talked about maybe one day adopting
a child. And we think it's time we got serious about that. We're gonna
adopt a girl. And I wanted to tell you and ask you what you thought. We
already spoke to your brother about it, and wanted to know what you would
say.

- Wow . . . mom! That's . . . that's . . . wow! So I'm gonna have a sister?

-- Well, yeah.

- That's . . . that's great! I love the idea! How could I object! Wait a
minute! That means I'm gonna be the middle child then! I'm gonna get middle
child syndrome!"

"You're such an idiot!" Cynthia said laughing at the story, but coming to a
quick halt due to a coughing attack.

"You okay? You want me to get the nurse?!" I said standing up from my
chair.

"No, no! I'm fine! Just need some water!" She said taking a sip from her
cup. "Go ahead, continue!"

"Ok, so yeah, we talked about it for a couple of hours. She said that she
had wanted to wait till she told me to go and do it. So, with my blessing,
about a month and 6 other European countries later, I get a call from mom
on my cell, and she told me that the next day would be the day. I wished
her the best and told her to give me a call as soon as she had got home. It
worked out too, cause I had the next like, two days off I think, either
that, or I had a light schedule. So anyway . . . the next day, I surprised
them by showing up to the house before they left. Now, I don't know if you
know this or not, but they had wanted to adopt a girl of about 7ish or
younger. They said no older than 7, cause they didn't wanna deal with all
that. But, of course, it didn't turn out that way. I remember the story she
told me. She was so excited that day! She said that her and dad had went
down to take a look at a few different kids. And after the first 3 or so,
they were starting to have doubts. So, they thought they should give up and
maybe try again when they were 100 percent sure. So they were on their way
out into some hallway, and a little girl about 10 years old, came running
down the hall, screaming and laughing. She wasn't watching where she was
going, and she bumped right into my dad's legs and fell backwards, onto the
floor. You remember that?"

"Yeah . . . I felt soooo bad, cause I thought I was gonna get in trouble!"

"Dad just helped you up off the floor and laughed."

"Yeah, and Mrs. Garrimond was about to let me have it too! But . . . Mom
and Dad stepped in."

"Yup, hey! You gonna tell the story or am I?!" I said laughing.

"Go ahead!"

"Ok, so they asked you what your name was, and Mrs. Garrimond said, 'This
is Cynthia.  She's one of our older students here.' All while giving you a
dirty look. Then they started talking to you and Mrs. Garrimond told them
to follow her so they could see the other kids. But mom had told me, that
the minute she saw you look into her eyes, she knew that you were the
one. It was like fate caused you to come screaming down that hallway and
made you crash into dad."

"Then she said the words that I will never forget. 'No, no, I think we
found what we're looking for. Right honey?' Then looked at dad who was
smiling the whole time." Cynthia said growing a large smile on her pale
face.

"It was even freakier when it turned out that your last name was Rodriguez
too!"

"I know!"

"Oh my god! I remember when they brought you home!" I said starting to
crack up.

"Shut up! I wasn't THAT bad!"

"You practically fainted when you saw me there!"

"I did not!"

"They brought you home, and you had a whole bunch of stuff in your hands,
then you saw Ricky first, I remember, cause I was upstairs on the phone,
and I heard you come in. And I saw Mom and dad introducing you to Ricky
while I was on the stairs. Ricky smiled and you looked at him a little
scared at first, but you hesitantly shook his hand and smiled back. OH god,
then I cleared my throat and you all turned around, then you dropped
everything that was in your hands along with your jaw!" I said continuing
to laugh. "I was like, 'Oh god! My new little sister is a fan of mine!' I
couldn't help but laugh!  Then dad introduced you to me and you yelled, no,
you shrieked, 'OH MY GOD! ROB IS MY NEW BROTHER!!' And we all started
cracking up!"

"It wasn't that funny!"

"Yes it was!"

"Shut up!" She said coughing, then taking a sip of water.

"I remember you staring at me with star struck eyes! Then I told you to
calm down, and said, 'It's okay! If you're gonna be in this family, you
gotta act natural around me! I'm no different than you are.' Then smiled
and you ran up and gave a HUGE hug! Caught me off guard too! I almost fell!
Then mom told me to go show you to your new room. So you ran and grabbed
all the stuff that you dropped, and I took the rest and took you upstairs,
while the rest of them smiled and watched as you grabbed my arm and I led
you upstairs."

"That was when we became best friends!"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that!" I said chuckling. "That was when you
showed me your scrapbook."

"Which I still have! In fact, I have it here with me! Mom brought it to me
last week."

"You never could go anywhere without it!"

"Just on long trips!"

"Where's that picture we took on your first day at home?"

"Right here!" She said flipping to a page that had a Polaroid picture of me
and her sitting on her bed, as I held the camera in front of us and took a
picture.

"It was right then that I knew that I was gonna spoil you rotten for the
rest of your . . ." I said thinking about the words I was just about to
use, and tears coming to my eyes as I realized that she wasn't going to
last much longer.

"Rob . . . don't cry. Please?"

"I . . . I can't help it! You don't know how much you mean to me!"

"Yes I do, but not as much as you mean to me."

"You were the one that helped me get over my break up with Lance!"

"You were the one who made me feel at home, even when you weren't even
there!"

"Let's not play that game."

"Rob . . . I want you to have this." She said closing her scrapbook and
pushing it towards me.

"No, I couldn't!"

"Yes, please! pushing it towards me.

"No, I couldn't!"

"Yes, please! You're the one who deserves it most! You've been the greatest
brother that I could ever have asked for, you made the eight years that I
spent as your sister, the best of my life! And I know that it's going to be
hard for you, so I want you to have this and look at me whenever you need
me. And don't worry, I'll always be watching you.  You'll never have to
worry about me, cause I'm gonna always be with you." She said coughing
violently.

"I love you!" I said as she started to cough harder. "Cyn?" I said as the
coughing got worse. "Cyn!? . . . OH MY GOD!" I said grabbing for the
emergency call button, signaling the nurses to get into the room. Not more
than 2 seconds passed, when the room was filled with a doctoral staff, and
I was being pushed out of the room with the scrapbook in my arms. "NO!
CYNTHIA! NO!" I said starting to cry my eyes out. The nurses brought me out
into the hallway, and told me not to go in, or they would have me
removed. I leaned up against the wall right next to the doorframe, and slid
to the floor, with the book in my hands, and the tears flooding down my
face. Then, I heard it. The unmistakable sound of a heart monitor, going
flat line. I picked my head up, and had a look of complete shock on my
face. Not because of what I heard, but because of what I saw. In front of
me stood a bright, light blue light. I stared at this . . . thing in front
of me, and immediately knew it was Cynthia telling me not to cry. I stopped
crying right there on the spot and stood. I went to put my hand out and
touch what was in front of me, but as soon as I did, the light vanished. I
don't know whether it was my imagination or not, but I do know that it was
then, that I knew that I would never lose Cynthia. I turned the book over
to it's front and put my hand over the cover and felt it. A smile came to
my face, as I thought of how many memories were filled within those
pages. I was so caught up in the book, that I almost didn't hear my cell
phone ringing in my pocket. Coming to, I reached for my pocket and answered
the phone. "H . . . Hello?" I said hesitantly.

"Rob?!" Melissa beamed into the phone.

"Hey Mel." I said in a confused sort of tone.

"GUESS WHAT?!"

"What?"

"JOSH PROPOSED!!!! AAAAAHHH!!!" She said screaming in joy.

"Th . . . that's great!" I said, as happy as I could at the moment.

"Well, don't sound TOO thrilled!" She said laughing, but then realizing why
I might sound so bummed. "Oh wait . . . don't tell me . . . Cynthia?!"

"Y . . . yeah." I said still in that confused tone.

"Oh my god!" She said in complete shock. "When?!"

"Just now. I think . . . about 5 minutes ago maybe?"

"OH MY GOD! I'm so sorry! Do your parents know?! Are they there? What about
Ricky!?"

"Um . . . no, I haven't called them yet. I'm still in shock I think."

"You want me to call them?!"

"ROB!" I heard my mom yell from down the hall, as she, my dad, and Ricky
were running towards me.

"N . . . No, they just got here! I think the hospital called or something."

"I'm coming up!" Melissa said.

"No, it's . . .it's alright! You're all the way in Orlando!"

"Josh can get the company to fly us up there in no time! We could be there
in 4 hours!"

"No, it's ok! Really!"

"I'm coming up, and you can't stop me! BYE!" She said hanging up, as my mom
reached me, and pulled me into a tight hug, followed by my dad and brother
hugging us on top of that.

"They just called your father on his cell phone! We were in the parking
lot!" My mom said through her sobs.

"Mr. and Mrs. Rodriguez!" The doctor said exiting the room

"Dr. Jacobs!" My dad said, looking at him as if for some answers.

"I'm so sorry, Cynthia just couldn't hold on any longer. She fought as hard
as she could, and it's amazing that she lasted this long. I'm very sorry
for your loss, and when you're able to, the hospital has some paper work
for you to fill out. We don't expect you to do it right now, but when you
feel you're ready, one of our nurses will bring you to my office."

"Thank you doctor." My father said, as always, being the strong one for the
rest of us.

						*

						*

						*

It's been about 3 months since Cynthia died, the funeral was gorgeous, cost
was NOT an option. It was truly the way she deserved to be remembered. It
was a truly sad and emotional day for us, but like everything else, with
every tragedy, comes an even greater celebration of happiness. It is now
Melissa and Josh's wedding day. I've been going crazy helping make the
arrangements for everything. Since Melissa's father is no longer with us, I
took the role of the bride's father, including paying for everything (with
some help from the guys) and giving the bride away. I wanted to be maid of
honor, but we thought it'd look too weird. Secretly, I've been in planning
a couple of surprises to be done during and after the wedding, one of which
were Josh's vows. The plan came from an old MMC episode, where he sang "Now
and forever" with Tony playing the guitar and singing harmony. Josh told me
he had a dream, well . . . flash back if you will, about when they did it,
and just remembering the lyrics, was what made him finally decide to
propose. We also arranged for the six of us to do a song at the
reception. That was my idea, cause of a song of there's that came to my
head on the day of Cynthia's funeral.  The song was "Here and now", and it
was an OLD one from their European debut album! The song was just
beautiful, and since the funeral was really the first time the six of us
had been together all at the same time in a couple of years, the lyrics
just made me think about all the times we had spent together, and how much
I had missed them. The last surprise, which was going to come before "Here
and now", was something that Justin had came to me about. He said that it
would be really cool for us, (meaning me, him, Joey, Chris and Lance) to
sing Josh and Mel's song at the reception, which was "For the girl who has
everything". I told him that I was thinking something similar, and the fact
that he had brought it up, just made it even more special.


"Now take this ring and repeat after me," The priest said in front of the
huge amount of guests. "I take this man,"

"I take this man," The words were repeated, as everyone stared at the
loving couple, all thinking the same thing, it was about time they got
married.

"To be my lawfully wedded husband,"

"To be my lawfully wedded husband,"

"To have and to hold,"

"To have and to hold,"

"To love and to cherish,"

"To love and to cherish,"

"In sickness and in health,"

"In sickness and in health,"

"Till death do us part."

"Till death do us part."

"Now, it has been brought to my attention, that the groom, has his own
vows? Is that correct?" The priest asked, looking at Josh, who nodded as
Melissa looked at him confusedly.

"With the help of two good friends of mine, Rob and Tony, I'm going to
perform a song which will act as my vows. This was the very song that urged
me to propose, it's called, 'Now and forever'". Josh said looking at
Melissa, then at the guests.

As Tony set up with his guitar, Melissa gave me a look that combined, "I'm
gonna kill you!" and "I love you so much, thank you!" in a way, only she
could do. She then looked back at her husband, so they could start.

Josh and Tony had performed this song together on MMC years before, when
they were just teenagers. Their voices, now more mature and richer, made
the song even better than I remembered it. By the time they got to the
middle, Melissa started to cry in complete bliss, Josh smiled, and
continued with the song,

"I'm holding a fortune that heaven has given to me.  I'll try to show you
each and every way I can.  Now and forever, I will be your man.  Now I can
rest my worries, and always be sure, that I won't be alone anymore.  If I'd
only known you were there all the time, all this time.  Until the day the
ocean doesn't touch the sand.  Now and forever, I will be your man."

At this point in the song, there wasn't a dry eye in the house, and
whatever person wasn't crying, couldn't help but shed a tear after Josh
stepped back up to the alter with the mic, and sang the last line to
Melissa.

Now and forever, I will be your man."


"Now, by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you, husband and wife! You
may now kiss the bride!"

They continued to look into each other's eyes for a moment, then Josh
pulled her in and gave her, her first kiss as Mrs. Melissa De
Costa-Chasez. It was an emotional moment in all of our lives. They were the
last of us to get together, but the only couple of the three to last, and
it took them eight years to finally get married. We were all happy for
them. Throughout all the hardships, throughout all the rough waters, we all
managed to stay friends, some not as close as always, but friends
nonetheless.

At the reception, the guys and I took turns saying something to the bride
and groom, and after that was when we sang their song for them. It was the
first time we all performed together in years. I took Josh's part, and
Justin stayed with his. And as we brought 'For the girl who has everything'
to a close, Melissa and I looked at each other, and saw how much we meant
to each other, in that one glance. As the night went on, Josh had told
Lance and I that he wanted to speak with us. So, after awhile of
socializing, the three of us excused ourselves, and went outside into a
garden, that was outside the banquet hall.

"So what's up bro?!" I said nudging him on his arm.

"Yeah, why'd you wanna talk to us?" Lance asked with a smile on his face.

"Well, we don't have that much time, so I'm just gonna come right out and
say it."

"What?" Lance and I said at the same time.

"I have a proposition for you both." We both looked at him as we stopped in
front of a fountain and took seats on the ledge. "As you both know, I've
been planning on starting up my own record label. Now, Zomba has given me
the final ok, but I told them to hold off for a little, because there was
something that I wanted to do first."

"That being?" I asked, anticipating what he was about to ask.

"I want you two to be co-founders with me."

"Why us?" Lance asked.

"Well, for one thing, JLR just sounds really cool for a name!" He said as
we laughed.  "But seriously! The reason I chose you guys first is cause,
one, Lance, you got your feet wet with the label thing already, and Rob,
you got the producing thing down! We've proven to work well together in the
past, and I know that you guys were thinking of doing the same thing
eventually anyway!"

"Josh, I wasn't THAT great with the label! You know that FreeLance bombed
back in 04!"

"But that wasn't your fault!" I said trying to convince him, "It was those
partners that bought out your family! You had to let them buy them out,
otherwise it would've went under sooner!"

"You followed the story?"

"Of course! Just like I know you followed when I came out."

"He's right! And Lance, you know that you love running a label just as much
as you love singing!" Josh continued.

"Yeah!" I added.

"Alright, fine! I'm in!" He said smiling, and caving in.

"What about you Rob?" Josh asked.

"Of course I'm in! I've been meaning to approach Zomba with something like
that ever since they merged with BMG and took over RCA 2 years ago! But,
with everything that's been going on, it just hasn't been the right time."

"Well, great! Now that you guys are in, I can go over to some of the CEO's
that are here tonight and let them know that we're ready to go through."

"Lemme guess, you expect us to start everything while you're on your
honeymoon too right?" Lance asked, knowing Josh all too well.

"Of course! Consider it a wedding gift from you guys to me!"

"Does that mean I get to take back platinum bracelet set I gave you?" I
asked.

"HELL NO!"

"That's what I thought. Well, let's go get this thing started then!"

"After the party!" Lance said.

"Ok, so you wanna meet me back at the hotel? We'll start planning out what
we're gonna do . . ."

"Sounds good to me!"

"Cool! Now let's get back to the party, I got a bride waitin there for me!"
Josh said after exchanging a quick hug with the both of us.

"Wait . . . Hold on, Josh? Can I speak to you for a second?" I asked as he
and Lance both turned around.

"Sure, I'll be right behind you Lance!"

"Ok, I'll see you guys inside!" Lance said walking in.

"What's up?"

"I just wanted to thank you . . ."

"For what?"

"For making Mel so happy! I mean, I know I don't have to tell you that you
better take care of her, cause I know you will! You're one of the sweetest
guys I know, and there's no doubt in my mind as to how great of a husband
you're gonna be. I guess I'm thanking you for being a good . . . no a great
friend to me, and being an even better boyfriend to Mel."

"Well, in that case, I should thank YOU for introducing me to her! Well
. . . even though you technically didn't, but still . . . you know what I
mean!"

"Yeah . . . so good, we're even then!"

"Of course! So, come on bro, let's get back inside!"

"Aaaaw! Isn't that a Kodak moment?!" Melissa said startling the both of us.

"Hey!" I said grinning, seeing her in her wedding dress.

"WIFE!" Josh said opening up his arms.

"HUSBAND!" She said laughing as she made her way into his arms.

"Husband and wife?" I said laughing.

"Shut up!" she said smacking me on my arm. "So, what are you two doin out
here?"

"Nothin, just talking."

"Oh, well come on back inside! My mom is requesting your dancing skills
Josh, and Justin is looking for you Rob!"

"Ok, well, we can't keep her waiting then!" Josh said as we started back
towards the hall.

"Hold on, you go ahead Josh, I wanna talk to Rob for a second!"

"Damn, I'm never gettin back inside, am I?" I said laughing, getting
another smack on the arm.

"Ok, I'll see you inside!" Josh said laughing as he went back in.

"What up beautiful?" I said smiling.

"Are you okay?" she asked concerned.

"Yeah, why?"

"I dunno . . . I guess ever since . . . well . . . for awhile now, you've
seemed down, and I wanted to know if you were alright, before I went off to
Aruba for two weeks!"

"Yeah, I'm fine! Really! I'm adjusting to everything, but I'm gettin
along!"

"You sure?"

"Yeah!"

"Ok . . . well, if you need me while I'm away, Josh is taking his laptop
and cell phone, he's leaving it off, but we're gonna check for messages
every now and then . . ."

"Ok . . ." I said laughing, knowing what she meant by 'every now and
then'. "You look absolutely beautiful tonight!" I said still smiling.

"Thank you . . . for everything!"

"I love you girl!"

"I love you too . . ." She said getting teary eyed.

"Ok, let's get inside before we BOTH get all mushy and shit!"

"Sounds good to me!" She said laughing.

As the night went on, it was filled with dancing, and good times. It came
to an end around 12, simply because the newlyweds had to get up at 6 to
catch their flight to Aruba. As planned, Lance and I went back to the hotel
to plan out what was gonna happen. Neither of us were tired, so we didn't
mind starting that late.

"Ok, so I talked to the Zomba CEO's while you were outside talking to
Josh." Lance said as we went up to his room in the elevator. "They said to
come up with a proposal and fax it over to them by Monday, SO, we have
tonight and all of tomorrow to come up with one."

"Shouldn't be a problem." I said leaning on the wall. "Josh gave me some
notes as to certain specifics he wants. He said that he trusts us with
everything, and to just email him with what we have planned.

"Can I ask you something?" Lance asked as the night grew later, and we took
a break from planning.

"You just did . . . nah, sure! What's up?" I said leaning against the
couch, since we were sitting on the floor.

"The real reason . . . why haven't you been working? I mean, it's been
almost a two years since you've made an album . . . why?"

"The truth? Well, I've just been laying low for awhile. The last album
didn't do too well, and that was cause I came out. And it was either come
out, or let some asshole try and blackmail me! So, I decided to bite the
bullet and come out! That, and cause of everything that's been going on! I
mean, with Cynthia getting her relapses and ultimately dying in the
hospital, plus, Jay's death . . . I mean, that hit us pretty hard, I mean,
even though we weren't friends anymore, still, a drive-by . . . I couldn't
help but blame myself for awhile, thinking that maybe if I had done
something different, we would still be friends and that wouldn't have
happened."

"You couldn't help that . . . it was his decision. You can't blame
yourself!"

"I know, I mean, I've gotten over it, it was a year ago . . . It's just
that a lot of things have been overwhelming me! But mainly, it was the
coming out thing. The tabloids tried to tear me to shreds! I didn't let
them, but still . . . it kinda gives you an ill view on things when it
seems that one minute they're loving you for your talent and music, then
the next they're ripping you apart cause of who I am, meanwhile it didn't
matter before, and I was the same person!"

"But even though they did do some bad press at first, it all turned around
once the others started to come out! I mean, look at what happened when
Ricky Martin came out! And who would've thought that Mariah Carey was
bisexual!? And those are just a couple in the music world! Don't get me
started on the actors! You were the one who really made it okay to be gay
or bi in the entertainment business! It was like, all of a sudden, we
didn't have to hide it anymore! I mean, hell, it took me awhile but I
finally did it!"

"What?! When!?"

"On Friday . . . I had an interview with Rolling Stone, they were asking me
about Josh's wedding, and they asked me what I thought about you coming
out, and I told them that it didn't matter to me, since I had been trying
to do the same thing for years."

"Oh shit!"

"Yup, by Monday, it'll be all over the tabloids and airwaves."

"Whoa . . ."

"That's one of the reasons I asked Josh if he was sure he wanted to choose
me! I mean, Chris has been doing good with his label, he should've asked
him!"

"Look, Josh asked you cause like he said, the three of us together make a
good team!  And Chris is too busy with FuMan to venture out into another
label. And like you said, it's more accepted now to be gay or bi in the
business now, so it won't have as bad of an aftermath as it did when I came
out."

"Then why have you stopped working if it was accepted?"

"Who said I stopped working?"

"But . . ."

"Lance, you should know me well enough to know that I NEVER stop working!"

"True . . ."

"I may not have come out with an album, but I've got a LOT of material that
I've been working on!"

"So, what's holding you back from putting it out?"

"I dunno . . . I mean, I guess now WOULD be a good time! But then I'd have
to tour, and we wouldn't be able to get the label up . . ."

"Stop making excuses! You don't HAVE to tour, and if you do, it can be a
short one!  Maybe just national, instead international! And you'd be able
to stay involved with the label and still be able to tour! I mean, we've
done it thousands of times!"

"True . . ."

"So . . . is that a yes?"

"Yeah, I guess!"

"YES!!!" He said giving me a huge hug.

"Ok . . ." I said laughing, as he knocked the both of us on the floor.

"Oh . . . sorry . . ." He said as he sat back up.

There was an awkward silence for a second, but that passed and we got back
to talking about the label. It got later and we both grew tired, we
eventually worked our way up from the floor and onto the couch. We wound up
talking until nearly four in the morning, and somehow, wound up falling
asleep on the couch.  I awoke around 11 the next morning to see Lance lying
on my chest, and my arm around his shoulder. I found myself doing something
that I did when we first met, and something that I had often done while we
were together; I watched him sleep. As I lay there with my arm blocked by
the back of the couch, and his shoulder pressed up against it, I found that
I didn't want to move it. It was like a sudden wave of familiarity came
rushing back to me. Like all of a sudden, I remembered how it was to be so
much in love with someone, and have that love be equally returned. I hadn't
felt that kind of love in a long time. I mean, in the eight years we had
been apart, I had loved and lost again a few times, but none of them were
like what I felt with Lance. And as I lay there, looking at this beautiful
man on top of me, I realized, the reason that was, was because with all
those other men and women, I kept comparing them to Lance. As funny as it
sounds, comparing a woman to Lance, I always felt love, but it wasn't the
same as the love I felt for Lance . . .  the love I feel for Lance.

"You're thinking the same thing I am aren't you?" I heard him say, his
voice that familiar deepness of the morning.

"What?" I asked, my voice equally as deep.

"We made a mistake . . ."

"What are you talking about? We didn't do anything. We just . . ."

"We made a mistake ever breaking up." He said looking up at me and putting
his finger on my lips.

I just simply nodded my head and we continued to stare at each other. It
was as if time stood still in that stare . . . better yet, time went
backwards. Back to a time when we were madly in love with each other and
made each other the happiest we could ever be.

"Lance . . . I . . ."

"Shhhh . . . I know . . ." He said still staring at me.

A thousand words were being said in the look we were giving each other. And
just when I thought it couldn't get any better, it did; Lance crawled up to
me and we kissed. It was the first kiss we'd shared in eight years. Eight
long years that led us right back to where we started. We both knew what we
felt, it was emitted in that kiss. It was like a dream that neither of us
wanted to wake up from, and we held on, both afraid we would be forced to
part, both praying that this wasn't a dream, that it was real.

						*

						*

						*

"Now take this ring and repeat after me," The priest said in front of the
huge amount of guests. "I take this man,"

"I take this man," The words were repeated, as everyone stared at the
loving couple, all thinking the same thing, it was about time they got
married.

"To be my lawfully wedded husband,"

"To be my lawfully wedded husband,"

"To have and to hold,"

"To have and to hold,"

"To love and to cherish,"

"To love and to cherish,"

"In sickness and in health,"

"In sickness and in health,"

"Till death do us part."

"Till death do us part."

"Are there any objections as to why these two should not be joined in Holy
Matrimony, let them speak now or forever hold their peace." There was a
dead silence as no one spoke their objection.

Then, the kiss . . . and what a magical one it was, people said that they
could see the love flowing within as the kiss permeated through
time. Everyone cheered, happy for the couple and touched at the love that
was shared. Finally joined together, finally married; that's what everyone
thought.

The wedding made the cover of all the newspapers, and practically every
magazine that showed interest. The story was broadcasted on TV and radio
alike, and in every news media coverage, the same headline was read,

"Robert Rodriguez and Lance Bass tie the knot!"

No worries, no regrets, just love, a love that held strong through many
trials, a love that would take us into history and show the world who we
were, Rob & Lance.


						The end

So, there it is! Again, I'd like to thank all of you! Ok, I'm gonna stop
here before I get all mushy eyed and start to cry! Ok, goodbye all! Thank
you with all my heart!

Rob