Date: Fri, 27 Jul 2001 07:56:01 -0700
From: mistress_n9@juno.com
Subject: Scared 5

Disclaimer: Not true. Don't know their sexuality. Don't know
them...PERIOD! This here is a work of fiction. Except for Dr. Aaron
McMillan. Idea of BA (a.k.a. Yoko the Battle Angel) belongs to Yukito
Kishiro. Very close to Alternate Universe but not quite.

Sue me? *Shakes head* "Nothin but pennies in my pocket/Nothin but a fire
to keep me warm/C'mon, I'm broke do not doubt it/So don't even sue."
(um, only first line belong Mandy Moore)

Um, sorry if I post these chapters a li'l late. It's because I'm working
on a different project that acquires a lot outta me.

I like email. I like knowing how I'm doing so far. I like to interact
with fans and readers. Please email me at: Mistres_N9@juno.com

"Scared"
A (pathetic attempt at a) novel by Nimm

Chapter 5
Brian tossed and turned in his bed. Nightmares attacked him from all
angles. Sweat formed, as he whined and whimpered through the night. AJ
could do nothing but sit it out.

*~Dream~*
"Faggot!" someone screamed as they punched him. Brian cried out in pain.
"That's it! Cry! Cry like a freakin' faerie!"

I can't endure anymore! Why can't I fight back? Brian thought to
himself. His mom and dad appeared in the darkness. "Mama! Daddy!" he
cried out.

"Brian, your heart problem was enough. But this?" his mother asked
coldly. "You know it is wrong according to the Book. You are a Sinner.
You'll burn in Hell for what you've done." His father said nothing but
glared at him.

"Daddy?"

"I have only one son." his father replied. Brian gasped, as the world
around him became a dark void. He could feel himself falling as he heard
insults and derogatory comments. Memories caught up with him.

"Look at him: Mr. Church Boy."

"He's weak."

"Ignore him. You might become gay too."

"He's just in the way."

"He's stealing all the attention. We should kick him out."

"LOSER!"

"FAGGOT!"

"QUEER!"

"Betcha he cross-dresses too."

"Yeah, a regular Drag Queen."

"Betcha he has wild orgies with other FAGGOTS like him."

The cruel faces of his supposed friends and family swirled around his
head. He whined and curled into the fetal position. No one loved him.

*~Real Life~*
"Brian! Brian wake up!" screamed AJ as he shook the comatose shoulders
of his friend. "Brian, you HAVE to wake up from this nightmare!"

*~DREAM~*
Falling.

Deeper.

More downwards.

Am I going to hell for what I've done, he thought to himself as tears
stung his eyes. All he could do was cry with his mouth hanging open as
he slowly floated down an endless tunnel of darkness.

Downwards.

In a strange way, he felt calm. Maybe if I die, everything will be
better, he thought.

He was alone.

He was always alone.

They all left him.

They never cared.

They only cared about themselves.

They never cared about him.

They left him alone.

"YOU LEFT ME ALONE!" he screamed into the darkness as he fell deeper and
deeper into the deep abyss.

*~Real Life~*
"Brian! WAKE UP!" he sobbed. "Please!"

Brian's body began shaking violently as if a continuous bolt of
lightning was striking it. His eyes were wide open and AJ could see the
pure anguish written in the lost sea of blue. Tears streamed down AJ's
face.

"Please, Brian!" he begged. "PLEASE COME BACK TO ME!"

The body continued to jolt. AJ draped himself across Brian and hugged
him with all his might.

"Please BRIAN!"

*~Dream~*
"Huh?" asked Brian as he saw a ray of light burst out through a wall of
the tunnel. "What was that?" Another ray burst through. "Uh." He
struggled towards the light but the darkness held him down. "Alex," he
felt the darkness give out. "HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLP!"

*~Real Life~*
Brian's body stopped shaking. "BRIAN!" AJ screamed.

He sniveled as he held Brian's cooling hand.

"Brian, don't leave me. I love you." A single tear rolled off his face
and landed on Brian's heart.

*~Dream~*
"AAH!" he screamed as he waited for impact. None came. He opened his
eyes and looked around. He was being supported by a safety net made of
that light he saw earlier. He smiled. The net turned into a cocoon
around him. Brian cooed at the warmness and strong ness of the wrap.

"I love you."

Brian opened his eyes and looked up where there was a hole. Someone
LOVES me?, he asked himself. Familiar notes rang through the darkness.

"Little love notes
Stuck in your locker
Who put them there you'd ask
When you ask all your guy pals
They'd say 'I dunno' but one
Sits quietly as you wonder

Who's this secret love?
Why won't he reveal himself?
Who's this secret admirer?
Maybe it's the silent one

Silent one
Cannot profess his love
Silent one
Cannot say a word
Silent one
Wishes he can tell the world
Yet only silent one
Quietly watching over his dream girl

Little presents
Here and there
Where'd they come from you'd ask
When you ask all your best pals
They'd say I dunno but one
Sits quietly as you wonder

Who's this secret love?
Will he reveal himself?
Who's this secret love?
Maybe it is the silent one

Silent one
Cannot profess his love
Silent one
Cannot say a word
Silent one
Wishes he can tell the world
Yet as only silent one
Quietly watching over his dream girl

Finally
I'll meet my secret love
And maybe
We'll be together forever
There he is
It's Silent one

So he's the secret love?
So, he reveal himself?
He's the secret love?
Truly it is the silent one."

That's---

*~Flash~*
"C'mon, Rok! It'll be fun! Freaking everybody out!" AJ laughed. It was a
release party from their record company. Everybody had been dancing to
music and AJ was just trying to be silly.

"K!" he replied as they danced out in the middle of the floor.

"You make such-a cute couple!" laughed Kit. Brian's step slightly
faltered as well as AJ's.

It was then they mutually thought: 'This is our song.'
*~Flash~*

I'm going home, he thought, someone loves me! With that, his cocoon swam
through the dark like a bullet.

*~Real Life~*
AJ sobbed. His friend was dead. "Brian..." he sobbed. The only person he
had ever loved was dead.

He jolted in surprise when he felt Brian's heart begin a slow and steady
beat. Color began to return to the older man's pallid face.

"B-Brian?" he asked nervously.

Blue eyes fluttered open as Brian's pure voice rang. "Alex?"


Ok, I know all y'all are busy with life but would it kill ya to email me
once in a while? No subject? How about Dead Rivalry? What's up with
that? I had everything! Someone kindly tell me what the hell was I
missing?!

*sighs* I don't want to do this again. People, if I do not receive AT
LEAST TWO email(s) about Scared, I'm afraid that I'll ask David to take
it off of Nifty.

I hate threatening. I know all y'all hate threatening too. But COME ON,
PEOPLE! I'd really appreciate it if I get an email or two once in a
while about the story.

What do I have to do? Scream, yell, and shout for your attention? Do I
have to rant about the boy band issue just to get SOME feedback?! What
do I have to do?! Tell me what DO I HAVE TO DO?!

Email: Mistress_N9@juno.com