Date: Tue, 25 Jul 2000 17:27:06 CDT
From: Matt Hunter <m_n_hunter@hotmail.com>
Subject: Search and Rescue 19 (Celebrity/Boybands)

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Well, despite my slacking tendencies, I finally managed to get this part
done, thanks in no small part to the constant nagging, I mean
"encouragement," of a lot of great friends.  This installment is dedicated
to them, as well as all of you who've taken the time to read my humble
efforts.  That being said, I'll keep this very brief.

First off, there are so many wonderful people who make this such a joy.  I
could never hope to individually name them all, but I sincerely hope they
know how much they mean to me.  There are a few, however, who warrant some
individual attention, and some who just require constant psychiatric
supervision.  It's those guys and gals who make this fun.

I must sent a shout-out to the very talented Mike Ellis ("Studio in the
Country").  He's got me involved in the editorial process of a new story of
his, "Love is Blind." It's a fantastic little story that's very near and
dear to my heart.  Then, there's one of my favorite Canucks, known far and
wide as Sprout.  Besides being an absolute cutie, he's a sweetheart and a
wonderful up-and-coming author in his own right ("This Gift").  Then,
there's a thoroughly untalented guy who I hang around with for a lack of
anything better to do.  If you're similarly bored, you might say hello to
him if you see him online--look for Goreckii *grin*.  In seriousness, he's
hilarious, slightly intelligent, and a hottie :)  All in all, worth the
effort of getting to know, but don't tell him I said so (but do tell him I
said he's a hottie--he hates that :)  To all of the rest of you, you all
mean the world of me, and if I haven't told you lately, feel free to cut and
paste and reminder.

Saving the best for last, it's always DLS.  A fantastic writer, my closest
friend in the world, and one of the few truly great things in life I've had
the pleasure of knowing.  I hope he knows that there's nothing more to say,
because the words fail me.  SHMILY, punk'n :)

I've been writing this story for almost a year now.  I've enjoyed every
moment, and I hope you have to.  This chapter has a few surprises, so I hope
you'll enjoy the ride.  I omitted a little bit that would have given away
some plot twists from "Brian & Me," so be sure and check it out in the weeks
to come to see what you missed :)

The same rules apply as the last eighteen chapters, so
enjoy.......................






	My eyes fluttered open, and I saw him, his angelic face, sleeping soundly
before me.  It was never a question of loving him, that was a given, but
after I heard, or rather, knew, how much he cared for me, I loved everything
about him.  A tear streaked down my face and caught itself in my pillowcase.
  I chuckled to myself, thinking what a sentimental sap I was becoming.  But
when I looked at him again, I just didn't care.  Smiling to myself, I
realized that I had never been in love before.  I'd never even come close.

	I just marveled in how much more beautiful he now seemed to me.  The long
eyelashes, the slightly oversized nose, the crooked smile--all of it
screamed to deepest parts of me.  I inched closer to him, taking the back of
my hand and stroking it down his naked thigh.  He giggled and jerked it
closer to him.  I pulled the sheets over both of us, because I was as cold
as he was.  After all, the air conditioning blowing directly over the dried
sweat on our skin was about to give us both pneumonia.

	"Morning," I greeted, ecstatically leaning over to kiss his closed eyes
before their crystal blue tint stole my strength.

	"Hey," he greeted, leaning over to kiss me back, this time pushing himself
on top of me.  He slid his tongue past my lips, and I welcomed him fully,
first grabbing his head, then sliding my hands down his back and squeezing
his butt.  He moaned, lifting his leg from between mine and bringing his
knee to rest beside my waist.  His abdominal wall involuntarily contracted
at my touch, and the rhythmic motion pushed his groin into my own.  That
little surge of electricity did it.

	I bolted up right, grabbing the sides of his face and kissing him for all I
was worth.  The abrupt shifts in weight and balance pinned him under me, and
he could barely stifle his grin when he noticed that our positions had
reversed.

	"Hey, guys, . . . ," a male voice called from the door as the door opened.
Tyler walked in before JC or I could cover ourselves.  "Oh, sorry," he
burned with embarrassment before rocketing out the door.

	I had such a stunned look on my face, JC just started laughing
uncontrollably, pulling me onto him and hugging me tightly as I joined him
in hysterics.  "Do you think we scarred him for life?" I laughed.

	"Probably," he smiled.  "But then again, he wasn't exactly the normal one
in  the family anyway."

	"And he needs to learn to knock," I added.

	"Unless the little horn-dog wants to watch," he laughed.

	"That's just gross," I rolled my eyes.

	"As long as I'm the only Chasez you're going for," JC cocked an eyebrow.

	"I don't know, Heather's kinda cute," I teased.

	"Now, that's gross," he smiled, sticking his tongue out at me.  I took him
up on the invitation . . . .


	Some time later, I pulled the sheet over his exhausted form and kissed his
sleeping forehead before sliding on my running clothes.  I slid quietly to
the kitchen, only to find Roy standing at the sink, looking into the
backyard.

	"Mr. Chasez?" I tenuously greeted.

	"I told you," he smiled, turning to face me, "it's Roy."

	I smiled and nodded.  "What are you doing up so early?"

	"Habit, I guess," he flatly acknowledged.  "Though, in truth, I have some
difficulty sleeping in strange beds."

	"I know what you mean," I chuckled.

	"I take it my son doesn't have that problem?" he asked, instantly
catapulting me on the defensive.  Apparently, the look on my face spoke
volumes, because he quickly added, "Don't misunderstand, Matt.  I was
referring to the fact that he's on the road all of the time.  If he couldn't
sleep in strange beds, he'd be dead by now from exhaustion."

	"Sorry," I muttered barely audibly.  "Guess I'm a little on edge."

	"I'm sure," he smiled briefly.  "I'm sorry to say that I'm probably the
chief one responsible for that."

	"I'm not one for pretenses, Roy," I admitted, "yeah, your bit in the car,
well, pissed me off."

	"Tell me how you really feel," he chuckled.

	"I'm doing exactly that," I said solemnly.  "I nearly destroyed things
between your son and I before they got started because I wasn't honest with
him.  I won't that mistake.  Not again."

	"Glad to hear it," he said flatly, sipping his coffee.  "Please don't take
it the wrong way."

	"How should I take it?" I asked, visibly irritated.

	"As a concerned father," he answered, catching me off guard.  I felt like
I'd been sucker-punched.  He'd just hit the one spot where I was most
vulnerable.

	"I'm listening," I said coolly.

	"I want to apologize," he said simply.

	I shook my head to indicate that I wasn't making the connection.  "Don't
get me wrong," he quickly amended.  "I'd do it again, even though I know it
isn't fair to you."

	"I'm really confused now," I sighed.

	"I did what I did not to attack you, but to protect my son.  As a parent
yourself, you have an understanding of that which Craig never possessed.
You know what it's like to be willing to do anything to protect your child
from harm."

	"Yes, I do," I whispered with clarity.

	"I just don't want him hurt," he said to me with pleading eyes.

	"Me, either," I acknowledged, "and it scares me to death that I just might.
  To risk him shutting off even a portion of the love that's in his heart is
something that I have to live with." I sighed, my shoulders sagging.  "I
don't know that I could live with myself, pardon the pun, if I do hurt him."

	JC came in about that time and stepped between Roy and me.  "What the hell
did you say to him?" he demanded of his father.

	"Nothing, baby," I smiled, pulling him into a hug.  "I'm just having my
morning breakdown of the day.  He was just here."

	"Are you sure?" he asked, squeezing me tightly.

	"Positive," I nodded.

	Roy dumped out the remaining contents of his coffee mug in the sink and
rinsed it.  He set it on the counter and started to walk past us, stopping
only long enough to kiss JC on the forehead and give my shoulder a
reassuring squeeze.

	"Come on," he whispered, rubbing my belly and nibbling on my ear, "let's go
back to bed for a while."


	"Are you guys decent?" I heard from the other side of the door.

	I smiled to myself and pulled the sheet over JC, who was asleep against my
chest.  "As good as it's gonna get, Tyler, come on in."

	"Still asleep?" he asked.  "It's the middle of the afternoon."

	"You know your brother," I grinned.  "Did you need something?"

	"Nah," he laughed.  "Just came in to see if you two were gonna grace us
with your presence today."

	"Maybe," I chuckled.

	"You better," Heather announced as she came in.  "It's all Dad can do to
keep Mom from bursting in on you both."

	"She might see something she doesn't want to," JC said groggily, his eyes
still shut.

	"Really?" Heather raised an eyebrow as she started to lift the sheet at my
waist.  JC quickly grabbed it and swatted her hand away.

	"Hands off the merchandise," he smiled.

	"I feel so cheap," I feigned.

	"And used," JC musingly offered.

	"Hey, are you guys in here having fun while you leave me with the
grown-ups?" Justin joked as he jumped onto the bed.

	"Um, I could have sworn Grand Central Station was in New York," I
announced.  "Everyone who isn't naked, get out!"

	Justin and Tyler immediately started to remove their shirts.

	"Everyone who hasn't slept with Matt, get out!" JC laughed.

	Justin started to remove his pants with a grin.

	"Everybody whose hair color isn't the one they have all over their body get
out!" I laughed.  Justin grinned, held his head in defeat, and followed
Tyler and Heather out.

	"Think we should get up?" JC asked me.

	"They're your parents.  You tell me," I smiled.

	"We better go," he grinned.

	"We should probably get dressed first," I smiled.

	"Good idea, funny man," he smiled.  "You first, I'll watch."

	"Is everyone in your family a voyeur?" I giggled.

	"God, I hope not," he scrunched his nose.



	"JOSH WON'T LET GO OF MY BALLS!" Tyler whined.

	I just shook my head.  I knew playing miniature golf was gonna wind up with
some comment like that.  The only question was who was gonna make it.  I
tried to ignore it by taking a sip of JC's drink.

	"Dad, aren't you gonna deal with these two?" Heather grinned.

	"Actually," Roy smiled, "I figure Matt would have the most to say about JC
grabbing someone else's balls."

	Okay, there was no way in Hell I was ready for that one.  Dr. Pepper
started shooting out my nose, and I almost aspirated.  I doubled over on the
ground trying desperately to catch my breath.  JC was right next to me
trying to make sure I was okay.  Roy was obviously very pleased with himself
for the zinger.  Karen, on the other hand, looked mortified but tried to act
nonchalant.  Heather, Tyler, and Justin were on the ground beside me--not
checking on me, but laughing so hysterically that they were having as
difficult a time breathing as I was.  Once he realized I was okay,
everything sunk in for JC, and if there was any possible way to die of
embarrassment, I was certain I was about to witness it firsthand.

	"Shall we, dear?" Roy grinned, placing his putter under one arm and
extended a crooked arm to Karen, who just rolled her eyes at him as she took
it, following him to the next hole.

	Tyler grabbed my shoulders and leaned into one ear.  "If there was ever any
doubt you were a part of the family, I'd say it's gone now."

	I leaned back and quickly kissed his cheek.  "Thanks."

	He nodded, and he, Heather, and Justin mimicked the Chasez elders, only
adding a skip and singing "We're off the see the wizard." I watched Justin
keep in step with the others easily, silently remarking to myself how well
he was moving in his cast.  It definitely wouldn't need to be on long.  At
this rate, they'd be back on tour in no time.  Then, the ramifications of
that thought seeped in.

	"What is it, sweetie?" JC asked when an errant glance caught the look on my
face.

	"Just thinking," I tried to smile.

	"So I gathered.  It's apparently what you were thinking that should concern
me."

	"Nothing bad," I smiled.  "Not really, anyway."

	"You wanna talk about it?" he asked.  I started to say "no," but then he
looked at me with those puppy-dog eyes.  Combining that with that little
voice in my head telling me not to keep anything from him, I melted.

	"Yeah, sweetie, I do," I smiled, daring to take his hand for just a moment
before we walked over to one of the concrete benches far off the beaten
path.  He straddled the bench to look directly at me, so I did the same.  "I
was just thinking how well Justin's getting around."

	"That look was for *that*?" he asked with wonder.

	"I was thinking that he'd probably have that cast off much sooner than
expected," I continued.

	"And how soon we'd probably have to go back on the road," he finished with
realization.

	"Yeah," I muttered in acknowledgment.

	"There's not some reason other than the obvious why you ask that, is
there?"

	I looked at him in puzzlement.  "What do you mean?"

	"Never mind," he smiled.  "My mind's wandering in a hundred directions." He
took my hand and pressed it to his lips.

	"Will you be careful?" I smiled, jerking my hand away.  "I'm not in the
mood for anyone to crawl out of the woodwork with pictures of us."

	"Ooh, scrapbook," he giggled.  "Besides, we weren't exactly doing the same
thing they were when someone decided to play private dick."

	I laughed, "You just wanted to say 'private dick,' didn't you?"

	"Absolutely," he grinned, leaning over to kiss me.  My reservations were
replaced by abandonment.  I pulled him into my arms and kissed him exactly
how I wanted to, onlookers be damned.

	"That's much better," I smiled.

	"I agree," he added, stroking the inside of my thigh through the leg of my
shots.

	"I guess I'm just not looking forward to your leaving," I admitted.

	"I'll be back," he assured me.

	"I know, Arnold," I smiled.  I got unexpectedly pensive and told him
exactly what I was feeling.  "I've just found you, and I'm just afraid that
you'll walk out the door and I'll lose you."

	"That's absurd."

	"Is it?" I posed.  "What could I possibly have to offer someone like you?"

	"'Someone like me'?" he echoed.  "Start explaining before I fly off the
handle."

	"Sorry," I hung my head.  "That didn't come out right."

	"Just talk to me, baby," he told me, leaning in to press his forehead to
mine.  "I want to know what doubts you have so I can make them all go away."

	Something about that last statement and the sincerity in his voice hit me
like a sledgehammer.  I quickly sniffed to keep from sniveling.  I'd shed
way too many tears lately.

	"Track record, I guess," I tried to smile.

	"I'm not Rich, and I'm not your father," he said flatly.  "I'm the man
who's hopelessly in love with you and can think of nothing he'd rather do
than put his head on your chest and listen to your heart beat for every
second of the rest of my life."

	"Is that really enough for you?" I asked him, trying desperately not to
lose my composure.  "I don't want you to lose a single opportunity.  You
have an amazing gift, and I don't want you squandering it by 'settling' for
me.  The door might not open a second time."

	"The *only* door I'm concerned with is the one I'll be walking through
every chance I get--so I can come home to you," he said, placing particular
influence on the word "home." "I'm not giving up anything.  If anything, I
have more in my life than any one man deserves."

	"I just don't want you to sacrifice anything for me, especially not to take
care of some bedridden invalid who'll be robbing you of the best years of
your life."

	"The best years of my life are any that I can spend with you," he smiled,
giving my hand a reassuring squeeze.

	I could see through the smile, though.  Even now, he was very uncomfortable
when I talked about the prospect of death.  Sensing this, I just hung my
head and let the topic of conversation drop.  The last thing I needed was to
do this to him right now, especially with his family here.  He brushed his
fingers through my hair softly until I finally suggested that we rejoin the
others.  We'd barely turned the corner before I saw Justin trying to slip
off unnoticed.

	"Why don't you go on ahead?" I told JC.  "I'll catch up."

	I subtly motioned towards the bathroom Justin was slipping into.  JC just
nodded and went ahead without me.  I walked into the bathroom, where Justin
was standing in front of a urinal.

	"Give it up, Curly," I smiled.

	"You know, Matt, considering that you and I have slept together AND you
threw me out of your bed today, do you really feel you have to resort to
taking advantage of me in a public bathroom," he said without turning
around, though I could hear the smile in his voice.

	"And do you think playing with yourself is gonna be enough to distract me
from asking you what you were doing spying on us?" I grinned.

	He turned around, embarrassed, though as expected, his fly was still
fastened.  "Caught, huh?" he asked me.

	"Yup," I cocked one side of my mouth up in a grin.  "So?"

	"So what?" he smiled.  "I wasn't eavesdropping."

	"Then what *were* you doing?"

	"Standing guard," he grinned, leaning up against the sink.

	"Against what?" I wondered aloud.

	"I was just standing there to make sure no one bothered you two.  It kind
of looked like you needed your privacy.  I didn't hear a thing, honest," he
explained sincerely.

	I leaned forward to kiss his forehead.  Tyler happened upon us about that
time.  "Okay," he laughed, "I definitely did not need to witness that.  I'm
gonna have to ask you both to leave."

	Justin and I just rolled our eyes and started out the door, but not before
Justin gave Tyler's butt a big squeeze.

	"Justin!" Tyler growled without missing a beat.

	"What?  I'm one of the straight ones here.  Why don't you think it's Matt?"
Justin tried to ask solemnly.

	"Because you've grabbed my ass before," Tyler grinned.

	"Oh, really?" I smiled at Justin.  His response was to push me out the
door.

	"Let's leave TJ alone," he smirked.

	"Apparently, I should be telling you that," I grinned behind me.  Justin
just growled and nudged us both out of the bathroom entirely.

	I caught up with JC, while Justin hopped past us to catch up with the
others.  I looked around and realized that everyone else in the place had
pretty much deserted us to the late hour.  There was one family on the last
hole, but it looked like the older kid was already turning in his putter and
heading for the car.

	JC was muttering obscenities under his breath as his ball hurdled past the
hole and down the incline.  "What's the matter, sweetie?" I grinned as I
dropped my ball onto the green and putted it directly in without missing a
beat.

	He glared at me as he walked over to his ball.  "Why are you so good at
this?"

	"I dunno," I confessed.  "Why are you good at hackey-sack?"

	"I'm not.  I just like doing it."

	"You're better than Lance and Joey," I smiled.

	"Yeah, that's hard," he grinned.  "And when did you see us playing
hackey-sack?"

	"A while back.  You had fallen asleep, and Kevin and I saw you guys on
television."

	"Oh, really?"

	"Really," I grinned.

	He walked up to me and put his hands in my back pockets, pulling me close.
"And what were you doing watching television with one of the 'Sexiest Men
Alive?'" he taunted.

	"Dreaming about how great it would be to be in love with one of the guys on
that screen.  The *real* 'Sexiest Man Alive,'" I smiled.

	"Good answer," he smiled back, leaning in to kiss me.

	"I thought so.  So what do you think my chances with Justin are?" I teased,
barely containing my giggle.

	He cocked an eyebrow.  "Probably better than your chances with me, right
now."

	"Ahem," I coughed.  "Why don't I show you what you're doing wrong?"

	"I think I've figured it out," he smiled.  "I've got lousy taste in men."

	I raised my eyebrow at him.  "I meant your swing."

	"Me, too," he grinned.

	"I *meant* your golf swing," I tried not to laugh.

	"Oh, that," he smiled.

	I just shook my head and stepped behind him, pressing my hips against his
and running my hands down his arms to his hands.  I wrapped my fingers
around his hands and pressed my lips on the back of his neck.  "Grip the
putter firmly," I breathed into his ear.  "Visualize the ball going where
you want it to." With that, I placed one hand under his shirt tail and
trailed my nails across his washboard.  "Imagine the stroke it's gonna take
to get it there," I whispered, trailing my fingers down the front of his
shorts.  I smiled to myself, because the angle at which we were standing
would make it impossible to discern what we were doing.  "Pull back," I
instructed, using the one hand to guide his own while the other vanished
beneath his basket, "and follow through." The minute the putter connected, I
gave JC a squeeze.  We both watched in utter amazement as the ball actually
went in the hole.  He looked over his shoulder with a smile and kissed me.

	"Hey, get a room!" Heather chided us.

	"I've got one," I assured her.  "Many of them, as a matter of fact.
Unfortunately, everyone feels the need to be in the one we're in at any
given moment."

	"Whatever," she spat sarcastically.  "You know Mom's gonna stroke if she
sees you two like this."

	"She should have seen us like TJ did this morning," JC grinned.

	"Gross," Heather gagged, as Justin and Tyler walked up behind her.

	"What's gross about it?" I smiled.

	"He's my brother!" Heather grimaced.

	"But Matt's not," Tyler smiled, "and from the looks of things, I know why
Josh always has that stupid grin on his face."

	My jaw fell slack with amazement.  JC was equally robbed of words.  Justin
and Heather, however, were not.  The both smacked the back of Tyler's head
and echoed in unison, "Thanks for sharing!"

	"Let's go inside," I glared at Tyler.  JC just laughed, took my hand, and
followed me inside with the others.


	After a few video games of the latest carnage du jour, I opted for the
ski-ball lanes.  I smiled and motioned for JC to follow my gaze to where
Justin and Heather were sitting.  Justin leaned over to lick Heather's ice
cream cone, but she quickly pushed it into his face, covering his nose.  He
just laughed, and Heather reached over to wipe his nose with her finger.
She brought it back to her lips and licked them clean before reaching for
him again.  He was looking down at where it had dripped onto his shirt, and
when he lifted his gaze, her fingers brushed his lips.  Their eyes lingered
on one another for a moment too long before they both turned away with a
sudden schoolgirl embarrassment.

	"Looks like the beginnings of something," I commented.

	"I hope so," JC smiled.

	I leaned over and grabbed one of the wooden balls and hurled it down the
lane and into the center hole.  JC just sulked.  "Is there anything you're
not good at?"

	"Plenty," I laughed.  "But I thought you might like a ski-ball lesson,
too."

	His eyes brightened, but the moment was cut short when Tyler draped an arm
over each of our shoulders.  "Oh, hell no!  I don't think I can stomach
another lesson."

	"Funny," I grinned.  "His stomach was the last organ on my mind."

	"That's just gross," Tyler made a face before shivering and walking away.

	"I have a better idea," JC suggested.

	"That being?"

	"Let's go back to the house, and we'll see what kind of lessons I can give
you."

	I grinned.  "Sounds like a plan to me."


	I decided to put on a pot of coffee while everyone was visiting.  I turned
to grab a filter from above the stove when I bumped into Roy.  "You sure
your Josh's father and not Kevin's?" I asked with a bemused smile.

	"What?" he asked me.

	"Nothing," I shook my head.  "Inside joke, I guess.  Can I get you
something?"

	"No," he smiled.  "I just came in to get a glass of water until the
coffee's ready."

	I reached into the fridge and grabbed one of the bottles of water I kept
for when I went running.  I handed him the bottle as I pressed the button on
the coffee-maker to get it started.

	"Thanks," he said.

	"Sure," I said absentmindedly, sealing the unused coffee back in its
canister.

	"Not for the water," he corrected.  I raised an eyebrow and motioned for
him to take a seat.  I took the one across from him.  "I was watching you
two tonight."

	I suddenly became very self-conscious, and my face blazed crimson.  "Roy, .
. . ," I stammered.

	"Relax," he chuckled.  "I thought it was cute."

	I blushed even deeper, and his chuckles just grew louder.  "Never in my
life have I seen him so content as he was tonight.  All the stress, all the
worries, all the doubts, all the fears--they seem to vanish when he's around
you."

	Despite my embarrassment, I couldn't help but smile at his words.  "That's
it," Roy said.

	Shaking back to reality, all I could manage was a "Huh?"

	"That look," he grinned.

	"I'm confused," I admitted.

	"All I have to do is mention your name, and he smiles, the way you did just
now.  Just the thought of you makes him happy."

	"I love him just as much, if not more," I assured him.

	"I know," he smiled, "and that's good to know.  I wouldn't leave my son
with you if I thought otherwise, even for a second."

	Listening to his tone, a thought occurred to me.  "You guys are leaving?"

	"Yeah," he nodded.  "I've decided we'll head home tomorrow."

	"So soon?" I asked.

	He just nodded.  "I need to get back to the office, and to be blunt, I only
came to make sure my son was in good hands.  I see that he is, so there's no
reason to hang around and interrupt what little time you two will have alone
together."

	I smiled at him, not really having any comment.  He gave my shoulder a
squeeze and went back into the living room.  I got up and fixed myself a cup
of coffee and stared out the window when JC came in.  He slipped quietly
behind me and rested his chin on my shoulder as he wrapped his arms around
my waist.  "You okay?" he asked me.

	"Yeah," I smiled, leaning back to kiss him.  "I just hate your family's
leaving so soon."

	"Dad just told us," he nodded.

	"It's kind of nice having a family around," I grinned.  "I've never really
had the girls around full time, so it's usually just me."

	"Do you ever get lonely?"

	"No," I shook my head, "or at least I didn't think I did, though having you
here with me now makes me realize otherwise in retrospect."

	"I'm sorry," he pouted.

	"It's not your fault," I assured him.

	"Yes, it is."

	"How so?"

	"I didn't find you sooner," he smiled, spinning me around to kiss him.

	"Good answer, Mr. Chasez," I giggled.

	"Thank you, Mr. Hunter," he grinned from ear to ear.  "So what kind of
prize do I get?"

	"Please don't answer that," Justin grinned from the doorway.  "My virgin
ears couldn't take it."

	"There's not a lot about you that's virgin, Curly," JC chuckled, "and I
don't think you want to be taking anything into what is."

	"That's just gross," Justin tried to smirk without laughing, though failing
miserably.

	"Okay, that does it," I threatened teasingly, as I grabbed Justin by the
front of his shirt.

	"And what are you gonna do about it?" he mocked.

	"What are you gonna do about it?" I returned.  "I'm obviously not the one
with repressed sexual tension."

	"Please, you know you want me," he sighed breathlessly as he went into a
pose-down.

	"I know how we can settle this," JC chimed in.

	"That being?" I asked.

	"Poker," he smiled.  "*Strip* poker."

	I just raised a questioning eyebrow at him.  "Why?"

	"He obviously feels he has something to prove," JC laughed.  "Besides," he
grinned, "I bet we could get Heather and Tyler to play.  Let's see if he can
walk the walk."

	I finally followed his idea and started nodding.  "Sounds like a good idea.
  We can ask them after the old folks go to bed."

	"Ask us what?" Heather wondered immediately when she entered with her
brother in tow.

	"If you wanted to play . . . cards," JC immediately covered when he saw his
parents waving goodnight to us on their way to bed.

	"What kind of cards?" Tyler asked cautiously.

	"Poker," I offered.

	"Strip poker," Justin corrected.

	"So what's in it for us?" Tyler asked.  "There's NOBODY here I want to see
naked."

	"Fine," Justin pouted.  "If you're feeling inadequate . . . ."

	"That really shouldn't work on me," Tyler frowned.

	"But it is?" I asked.

	"Uh-huh," he smirked.  "What about you, sis?"

	"I'm sure we can find something to keep her occupied," JC grinned, pushing
them both into the living room.

	"Do we really wanna do this with mom and dad so close?" Tyler asked.

	I just shook my head.  "That's what these are for," I chuckled, pulling the
divider doors shut and locking them.

	"Who's dealing?" Justin asked.

	"I am," I announced, snatching the cards from his hand and proceeding to
shuffle.

	"Where did you learn to do that?" JC asked as he watched me.

	"Do what?" I asked.  "I'm shuffling the cards."

	"No," Justin grinned, "I shuffle cards.  You're dealing like a cardsharp."

	I just smiled.  "Mom's older brother was a dealer in Vegas.  He taught me
how to play."

	"Why do I get the feeling the odds just shifted out of our favor?" JC
asked.

	"With you, sweetie, if you're taking off clothes, I'll definitely be
shifting in your favor," I smiled at him.

	Justin and Tyler shared a look that almost tore away what little composure
I had at the moment.  "Deal, Romeo," Tyler instructed.

	I shook my head and dealt as I had been told to do.  "Nothing's wild.
Jacks or better."

	"Damn, you are such a hardass," JC muttered.

	"If anyone would know," Justin giggled.

	I cut him a look, and he buried his face behind the cards as we began to
play the first hand.  After a couple of hours, all of the guys were down to
their underwear except for me.  I had only lost my shirt--literally.
Heather had only lost her shirt as well, still clad in her bra and pants.

	It came down to Justin, Tyler, and Heather.  JC and I had bowed out.
Heather took it easily with a full house.  I don't know where she learned to
play cards, but I definitely needed to find out.  With that, Tyler dropped
trou without a moment's hesitation.  I was about to laugh my ass off.
Justin was astounded.  "How can you do that so nonchalantly?"

	"Easy," Tyler smiled.  "I'm related to two of the people here, and unless
my brother's not doing something right, Matt's not interested.  That just
leaves you, and you already pinch my ass."

	"Alright, Curly, put up or shut up," JC grinned.

	Justin was sweating, and it was obvious.  Heather was blushing for him.
"Well, Curly, there's one way out of this."

	"I'm scared," he glared at me.  "But go ahead."

	"Truth or dare," I answered with a smile.

	"Now I'm really scared.  Nothing perverted, okay?"

	"Deal," JC answered for me.

	"What do I have to do?" he asked cautiously.  "Because I get the distinct
impression you're not gonna let me off with a truth."

	"Smart boy," I grinned.  "Nothing major, just a kiss."

	"Who've I got to kiss?  You?"

	"That's not a bad idea," JC raised his eyebrows.

	I raised my own questioning eyebrow at JC, who merely looked at me with his
tight grin firmly in place.  "Okay, smart guy," I laughed, poking JC in the
stomach.  Turning my attentions towards Justin once more.  "Four kisses."

	"Huh?" Justin asked rather noneloquently.

	"Four kisses.  One with everyone sitting here right now."

	"And not pecks on the cheek, either," JC added.  "Each of them needs to be
at least thirty seconds . . . ."

	"A minute," I corrected.

	"A minute," he smiled.  "And you have to do it like you mean it or it
doesn't count."

	"There's no way out of this?" Justin asked, biting the inside of his jaw.

	"There's one way," I reminded him, reaching over and grabbing the fly of
his pants.  He quickly swatted my hand away.

	"What's your interest in all this?" Justin asked suspiciously.  "You've
seen me naked."

	"It's all a part of a master plan," I beamed.

	"You and JC trying to get me to switch teams?" Justin chuckled.

	"Not exactly," JC guffawed.  "Now stop asking questions and kiss
somebo...."

	JC didn't even get it out of his mouth.  It probably had a lot to do with
the fact that Justin's tongue was preventing its escape.  At first JC's eyes
shot wide open, but they soon relaxed into closure, just like Justin's.  I
had to admit, I was captivated watching these two.  As they kissed, their
closeness showed.  After about a minute, however, a twinge of jealousy
reared its ugly head, and I separated the two of them, only to pounce on JC
myself.

	"To remind you who you're sleeping with tonight," I smiled.

	"No reminders necessary," he returned, before tackling me.

	"My turn!" Justin announced, pulling JC off of me and planting himself on
me.  I had to admit, the boy was one hell of a kisser.  I found myself
increasingly unable to concentrate, and the gentle strokes of his fingertips
along the sides of my face were not helping.  There was something about him
that alluded to a naivete, but kissing him, I realized that despite his
youth, he was full of a passion for life that few people ever knew.  When
his lips finally left mine, it took a few seconds to open my eyes.  I had to
shake it off and get my bearings once more, and I thought JC was going to be
reduced to fits of hysterical laughter because of it.

	"Shup," I warned him, "or I'll find somebody else to keep me company
tonight."

	"*Such* a bitch," he laughed.  "Fine," he muttered with a grin, turning to
Justin and Tyler.

	"I'm *not* kissing naked boy over here," Justin proclaimed.

	"Hey!" Tyler protested.  "It's either that or you be naked boy, part two.
Besides, you've grabbed my ass.  I'd think a kiss would be the least you
could do." He then stuck out his tongue vulgarly, and Justin clutched his
stomach like he was going to feel ill.  To his credit, he squinted tightly
and dove face-first into Tyler, causing the two of them to almost knock one
another out when their foreheads collided.  Tyler grimaced and Justin
scowled before making a second attempt.  As they kissed, I couldn't help but
glance at Tyler, to, ahem, see if he was enjoying it.

	Finally, it came to Justin and Heather.  No protests from either of them,
as expected.  As Justin leaned in to kiss her, Tyler started to say
something, and JC elbowed him so hard he almost toppled over.  When he sat
up once more and saw the pair kissing, it dawned on him what we were doing.
The two of them were completely entranced, so much so that Tyler, JC, and I
were able to slip away unnoticed.  I handed Tyler his clothes and slapped
his ass on the way to the bedrooms.  As we passed Roy and Karen's room, the
door was still shut, and because they had the room with the creaky
floorboard in front of it, I knew they were likely fast asleep, a notion
quickly confirmed by Roy's snoring.  I turned to JC, "If you ever snore like
that, I'm going to suffocate you." He just shook his head and slid right up
behind me, his anticipation very evident as he pushed me into the bedroom
for the night.


	"You realize how odd it is to play strip poker with your siblings, don't
you?" I grinned at him.

	"Yeah, probably," he admitted, "but it was for a good cause.  They look
good together, don't they?"

	"They do," I confessed.

	"Besides," he grinned back at me, "the only person I wanted to see naked
wasn't being very obliging."

	I pushed him onto the bed and straddled his hips before lifting my shirt
over my head.  "I can be very obliging," I cooed as I dove in to kiss the
nape of his neck while fumbling with his shirt.

	He stuck out his lip in mock protest.  "But you wouldn't do that for me
during the game."

	"Damn straight," I laughed.

	"You know, sweetie, that's kind of an odd term when you think about it," he
giggled.

	"I guess," I nodded, "though it depends more upon the emphasis.  I mean,
what if you see a cute guy.  You shake your head and go, 'Damn.  Straight.'"

	"That was weak, you know," he laughed, pulling me flush against his body.

	"You think so?" I raised an eyebrow.  I began to trail down his bare
stomach.  "Let's see what else I can get 'damn straight.'"



	"Come see us soon, Matt," Roy smiled as he gave my hand a firm squeeze.

	"I will," I told him, "but you guys don't be strangers either."

	"We won't," he smiled.  "If anything, I imagine we'll be seeing a lot of
each other."

	"I've seen enough," Tyler whispered behind me.  As soon as Roy's attention
was diverted, I elbowed Tyler in the gut.  "And that's quite enough out of
you," I smiled.

	"Take good care of my son," Karen whispered into my ear as she hugged me,
"and let him take good care of you."

	I nodded, trying not to shed a tear.  Damn, I hated goodbyes.  I hadn't had
that much experience with them, though it was enough to know I didn't care
for them.  I looked over the see JC mussing Tyler's hair.  Just beyond them,
I could see Justin and Heather, arms wrapped around one another, having one
last romantic moment.

	"Sweet, isn't it?" JC purred as he rested his chin on my shoulder.

	"You scared me," I grinned.  "I didn't hear you sneak up on me."

	"I'm like a ninja," he giggled.

	"More like a nimrod," I grinned, reaching back to peck his nose, "but yes,
it is." I was very grateful that we were the only ones in the VIP lounge at
the airport.  It looked as though everyone needed to be a little bit closer
than protocol would have allowed in public.

	"So who you gonna try to fix me up with, big brother?" Tyler chuckled as he
draped an arm over both of our shoulders.

	"I dunno," JC smirked.  "I kind of like the idea of Curly as my
brother-in-law.  If he and Heather don't work out, you're my next pet
project."

	I laughed, but Tyler just glared at him playfully.  "You better get a dog,
because somebody has to be the 'guy' in the family."

	"Please," JC laughed, "you've grabbed Curly's ass more than Heather has.
At the moment, I'd say you're leaning more towards our team."

	"'Leaning?'" I chuckled.  "He's leaning so far he bends." That instantly
earned me a growl from Tyler.  "You better watch him.  He's been checking me
out, so he may want what big brother has."

	"As long as he doesn't get it," JC smiled, wrapping his arms around me and
placing his hands in my back pockets, pulling towards him, "he can look all
he wants."

	"I told you about your family and its voyeuristic tendencies," I smiled.

	"Uh-huh," JC returned before leaning in to kiss me.  "Hey, TJ, what'd we do
with that video camera we got a few Christmases ago?"

	I slapped my hand over Tyler's mouth before locking mine over JC's once
more.  "If you need reminders, sweetie, I'm always up for repeat
performances."

	"I'll bet you are," Tyler laughed, pulling my hand away from his mouth.



	I lost track of the days soon after that.  I was so content, that I didn't
want this time to end.  I'd had countless more chemo treatments, not to
mention radiation treatments, and they hadn't gone all that bad.  Justin had
gotten the cast off, and now that he was 100%, the little bundle of energy
couldn't help but keep my mind off things.

	Nicky and Andy and the guys called me almost incessantly, and JC had flown
the girls in to surprise me on one of those rare occasions when I was
feeling down.  Kevin and Brian phoned me whenever they got the chance, and
Nate dropped me an occasional e-mail.


	Justin drove me to one of my treatments after an argument from me finally
got JC to stay home to work on some songs for the new album.  The stuff with
the record label was really starting to get to him, and I knew it.  If the
guys didn't finish up these last few concert venues and get to the studio,
things were going to erupt, and I knew it.

	"Hey!" Ange greeted as she walked into the room.

	"Hey, girl," I smiled in return as I unbuttoned my shirt.

	"You know, you're really starting to cause a commotion around the hospital
with the company you're keeping," she grinned.

	"Little ol' me?" Justin asked, fluttering his eyes.

	"You or your better looking best friend," I added, sliding on the gown.

	"At least this time, I don't have to send anybody out into the hall," Ange
grinned, sliding the IV into my arm.  We'd done this so much lately, there
was absolutely no pretense whatsoever.

	"I made him work today," I chuckled.  "Only one of us gets to be a lazy bum
at a time."

	"When's he ever gonna get a chance?" Justin laughed.

	"Keep it up, Curly, and I'll have Ange put a few things in you," I
threatened.

	"Now, now, Matt, I already said you'd get a shot at me one day.  No need to
threaten to take your toys and go home," Justin giggled.

	"Perv," I laughed.

	"And you want me," he smiled.

	"For what?" I laughed.

	"I'm sure, given enough time, you could come up with something," he
laughed, kicking back in the chair beside me with yet another book.  Little
oddball was such a contrast to what people expected of him.  No lessons in
ebonics, no trying to act cool, just a nice, normal kid.  Beyond that, a
particularly bright kid who read more than anyone I knew, with the possible
exception of Nate.  I wondered if the teenybopper magazines knew about that.

	"Hey, Ange?" I asked, as she started out the door.

	"Yeah?"

	"I'm gonna need something for nausea," I answered, my stomach starting to
churn.

	"Really?" she asked.  "You haven't needed anything since that first time."

	"I know," I panted, "but it's somehow worse this time."

	"Lemme go get it," she barely managed before scurrying out the door.

	Justin shot forward, his reading glasses and book set aside.  "What can I
do?"

	I started sweating profusely, and when I tried to stand up to make it to
the bathroom, I collapsed to the floor in a heap.  "Justin, help me . . . ."

	Justin pressed the nurse call button before clearing the bed in a single
leap.  He knelt beside me and tried to help me upright.  When he did, the
stars and spots swarmed before my eyes, and I lost any equilibrium I had.  I
threw up over absolutely everything, Justin being my primary target.  It
just kept coming.  My abs convulsed as the gastric contents spewed forth
endlessly.  Finally, just when I thought it would end, I felt the bitter
acid and acrid, bile taste well in my throat like a horribly magnified
belch.  When I released it, I could see torn pieces of my intestinal mucosa
spill onto the floor.  As if that weren't bad enough, then the blood came.

	I could literally feel my strength draining from me even further as the
floor splashed crimson.  Ange and two other nurses came running in.  Ange
was beside me instantly, shooting the medications into my line.  Justin
barked at the other two to help him stand me up.  They stopped to look
around for gloves for a minute, and Justin boiled.

	"DAMMIT!  I don't give a shit if he is covered in blood, help me!" he
bellowed.  After getting the gloves anyway, they all helped me stand and
basically lifted me to the bathroom.  Justin peeled my gown off me as the
others essentially held my head over the bowl for me.  Justin slid the
washcloth up and down my back, repeating that everything was going to be
fine.


	When my eyes fluttered open, JC was leaning over me, just inches from my
face.  His arm was locked beside me.  I couldn't begin to hazard a guess as
to how long he'd been just like that.  "Hi," I smiled weakly.

	"Don't 'Hi' me, mister," he tried to act angry.  "I thought you said you'd
be fine."

	"And I thought you were gonna get some work done," I breathed hoarsely.

	"Don't get motor-mouth started," Ange laughed as she came in to check on
me.  She secured a bracelet on my arm.  "You're not going anywhere tonight."

	"What?" I grimaced.  "Don't be ridiculous.  I'm fine."

	"Your hematocrit is fourteen.  You need more blood than an anorexic
vampire," she laughed.

	"Funny," I chuckled.  "Ever considered a career as a stand-up comic?"

	"Not once," she smiled.

	"Good thing," I smiled back at her.  Out of the corner of my eye, I could
see a bag of packed cells hanging.  "What unit is that?"

	"Don't ask," she tried to smile.  "Though considering the blood shortage
that's going on right now, you might wanna ask the celebrities over here to
help encourage people to donate."

	"Good idea," JC nodded.

	"Yeah," Justin agreed.  "As a matter of fact, I'll donate now.  Make me
feel like I'm doing something besides sitting here." The minute he said it,
he realized his mouth had bypassed his brain entirely.  If he hadn't known
it, the look on JC's face would have said it all.

	"JC, I'm so sorry," he apologized profusely.

	"It's okay, Curly," JC smiled, though Justin and I both knew it wasn't.

	"Considering how much of a distraction your presence could be, why don't I
get one of the blood bank people to give the stuff to me, and you can donate
in here?" Ange suggested.

	"No," Justin smiled.  "This is one time I want to cause a commotion.  If
they want to get close to me, they'll have to be in the chair beside me
donating."

	Ange and I both smiled.  "Okay, I'll be back in just a second to walk you
down there." Justin nodded.

	JC picked up the phone and started dialing.  "Who are you calling?" Justin
and I asked almost simultaneously.

	"They need more donors, and you need some family," JC smiled before turning
his attention back to the phone.  "Hey, Joe, do me a favor . . . ."



	"Good morning, sunshine," I could hear being whispered into my ear as
something tickled my nose.  I struggled to strain my eyes open, when I did,
I was greeted to an overly-chipper face.

	"Hey, pineapple-head," I chuckled.

	"Hey!" Chris protested.  "In case you haven't noticed, I got a new do."

	I laughed, "Now you look like a troll."

	"There's just no winning with you, is there?" he tried not to grin.

	"Not unless you turn into him," I smiled, pointing at JC, who was sitting
at the foot of the bed with a smile of his own.

	"Why in the hell would I want to turn into *that*?" Chris asked with mock
disgust.

	"Gee, Chris, I don't know.  Raw sex appeal, killer looks, and a singing
voice that makes a good portion of the general populace think wholly
unnatural thoughts about you," I grinned.  JC just continued to smile, in an
effort to conceal a blush.  "Oh, yeah, I forgot," I announced, regaining my
composure, "you've already got a singing voice."

	"Gee," he muttered with no false enthusiasm, "so kind of you to remember."

	"I remember, though if *I* had the voice of a prepubescent Vienna Boys
Choir member, I'd probably want to forget," I managed with a straight face.

	I thought Joey and Lance were gonna die laughing.  Chris immediately cut
them a look that turned Joey's attention back to the cartoons on the
television screen and returned Lance's eyes back to the magazine in front of
him.  Chris turned back to me smugly, only to be nailed by the hackey-sack
hurled at his head by Lance.

	"What?" Lance asked with false sincerity, only to chuckle under Chris's
scrutiny.

	"MATTY!  You're awake!" Justin yelled as he came through the door, leaping
onto the bed and missing any vital areas by mere inches.  He leaned over and
kissed my forehead.  "You better?"

	"He better be," Kathy warned as she entered with sacks in her arms.
"Somebody's got to save you from me for leaving me stranded among that
little group of stalkers out front."

	"With groceries no less," JC smiled, standing long enough to help her put
the sacks on the table in the corner.

	"I thought people were supposed to take it easy on you when you're
pregnant," Kathy grinned, "but thank you, JC.  I'm glad there's at least one
gentleman in the room."

	The rest of her statement might as well have gone unspoken.  Three sets of
eyes in the room had been locked on her ever since the word "pregnant"
passed her lips.  JC just smiled and laid down beside me, after pushing a
giggling Justin onto the floor.

	"Jeez, Matt.  I figure you told everyone else," Kathy smiled at me.  "I
just assumed they already knew as well."

	I burned crimson, turning my head to hide the guilt.  I was gonna be
hearing about this one for a very long time.  "You know what they say
happens when you assume something," Justin offered from the floor.

	"If the word 'ass' comes out of your mouth, Curly," Kathy warned, "I'll
break yours."

	"Better men than you have tried," Chris interjected, very pleased with
himself.

	"You wish," Justin retorted--poorly.

	"Actually," Lance smiled, "I think JC or Matt might, but as for the rest of
us . . . ." Lance paused to look at Chris and Joey.  "No, I'd say it's a
pretty fair consensus that we see your ass entirely too much."

	Joey was on the floor in fits, "And Bible Boy speaks." That earned him a
look from Lance, who was trying to act mad, but failing miserably.

	"Besides," Kathy cut in, hurling something at Justin, "if you want to eat
your cereal instead of wearing it, don't piss me off.  I'm hormonal."

	"Oh, yeah, that's new," I muttered.  "And what do you mean--'one'
gentleman?"

	"Exactly that, Mr. Mutter Under Your Breath Because You Think The Pregnant
Woman Won't Hear."

	"Busted," Chris taunted.

	"Don't you have an ugly dog to take care of?" I asked, eyebrow raised.

	"Normally, yeah, but you seem to be doing a good job of keeping JC amused,"
Chris said with a straight face.

	"Bitch," I smiled.

	"JC, he's calling you," Chris smiled, just before getting pegged in the
head by a box of cereal that just happened to be within my reach. "Ooh, JC,"
Chris smiled, rubbing his head, "is he always so rough?"

	"You have no idea," Justin giggled.

	"Neither do you, Curly," I smiled.

	"Oh, the sounds emanating from your room give me a pretty good idea," he
shot back.  I just sat in silence.  "What, no witty repartee?" he smiled,
proud of himself.

	"Sorry," I managed through a somber expression.  "I just didn't realize you
had mastered four-syllable words yet.  That hooked on phonics thing is
really paying off."

	"I hate you," he pouted.

	"No you don't.  You love me," I supplied.

	"Yeah, but you make it hard to remember why," he grinned.

	"Eew, JC, your boyfriend's making Justin hard," Chris groaned, only to be
accosted by whatever objects happened to be a handy missile volley for the
other six people in the room.




	"Well, you're finally gonna get to see us in action," JC smiled at me.

	"He's already seen you in action," Joey offered.

	"Thanks, Joe," JC grinned.  "Don't help."

	"Okay," Joey beamed, walking off to finish getting into costume.

	"You nervous?" I asked JC.

	"Nah.  I've done this a few times," he winked.

	I spun him around to help him fasten the back of his costume.  "I know, but
this is your first show in ages.  These guys have been waiting for this
make-up concert forever."

	"We won't disappoint them," JC said with assurance.

	"You couldn't if you tried," I smiled back at him.

	"Aww, how cute," Lance teased from by the other clothes rack.

	"The rest of these bozos, however," I quickly amended.

	"FIVE MINUTES, GUYS!  LET'S GET IN POSITION!" came from the other side of
the closed door.

	"You guys go ahead," JC told the others.  "I'll be along in just a second."

	"Okay," Joey laughed, "but there's no time for a quickie."

	"You mean it can take over five minutes?" Chris asked, feigning innocence.

	"For the real men, it can," I laughed, pushing him out the door, "but
you're right, Joey, there's not.  Not for us, anyway."

	"Too much information," Joey frowned before smiling and shutting the door
behind them.

	"Now that the peanut gallery is gone," I chuckled, "what's going on in that
pretty little head of yours?"

	"Are you okay?" he asked.

	"I'm fine, sweetie, really," I assured him, giving his hand a squeeze as I
went in for a kiss.  "Why wouldn't I be?"

	"I'm scared," he admitted.

	"You'll be fine," I reminded him.

	"I'm *not* talking about the show," he glared.

	"I know," I confessed, "but we both knew that the lazy days couldn't last
forever.  You have a job to do.  The label says you guys have to be on the
road tomorrow, so that's what you need to do."

	"Are you gonna be okay?" he asked again.  "I mean, less than a month ago,
you almost bled to death in that hospital room."

	"But I didn't," I reminded him, "and for the record, thanks."

	"For what?"

	"For the public service announcements you guys did.  All those people
seeing you guys give blood pulled the blood supply out of critical shortage
for the first time in months."

	"I just wish I would have given," he pouted.

	"You give more than you know," I smiled before stealing another kiss.
"Besides, you got the powers that be to donate half of the proceeds from
this concert to St. Jude.  I'd say you've done plenty."

	He tried to smile.  "I want to do more."

	"You will," I smiled.  "Tonight, I promise, but for now, you better get
that cute little ass of yours out on stage."

	"This little old thing?" he smiled.

	"Let me check," I grinned, sliding my hands down the back of his pants and
giving his cheeks a squeeze.  "Yup, that's the one.  Now go impress me."

	"I will," he smiled.  "Tonight, I promise, but for now, I better get my
cute little ass out on stage." I just shook my head and followed him out to
the backstage area.




	With a little help from Justin, the guys were staying at a hotel.  They
were going there after a post-party.  JC and I had the house to ourselves.
I had started to say something, but I was quickly cut off by his presence.

	"Shut up," he smiled.  "We can talk while I'm on the road.  There's a few
things I want to do tonight that I won't be able to for a *very* long time."

	I grinned, "You have no idea." Sliding the shirt from his shoulders and
pushing him onto the bed, I ran my tongue up his chin and into his mouth,
only to abruptly withdraw it again as he tried to seize it, instead licking
the cleft of his upper lip and the underside of his nose.  Repeating this
motion several times, his frustration was evident with the soft moans and
involuntary shudders every time I moved to the sides of his face.  His hands
found the taut denim covering my backside.

	Tenderly biting his tongue when he kissed me, I moved down his jaw line and
onto his Adam's apple.  Applying light suction, my saliva dribbled down my
chin and onto the pillow.  Gripping his pectorals firmly, I planted sloppy
laps down his chest to his nipples.  I bit one firmly as I squeezed the
other.  Alternating between the dark mounds of flesh, I almost lost my
balance as he arched his back.

	I followed his treasure trail with my mouth as my fingers nimbly tugged the
pants from his legs.  To my pleasant surprise, that was the only obstacle I
found in my path.  I drug my tongue through the tangled thatch of short
hairs and up the shaft, instantly earning a taste of things to come from the
tip.  I lapped it up greedily before he pulled me up to him so he could lock
his mouth atop my own.  I squeezed his inner thighs firmly as he grabbed the
waistband of my jeans.

	When I started for his groin, he pushed me around so that he had easy
access to my pants.  He removed them with ease before pulling my head
towards the pillow.  He scooped my tongue with his as it moved up the side
of my mouth.  Repeating much of my same motions along my chest, he stopped
to pay particular attention to the rigid muscles of my stomach, brushing
every inch with movement that missed nothing.

	He took me into his mouth as his fingers massaged my testicles.  His
rhythmic movements pushed me close to the edge, and I pushed him off of me
to let him know.  We shifted against one another so that every muscle found
its counterpart.  Leaning back onto my knees, I felt him raise his hips in
expectation.  Smiling, I shook my head.  "Make love to me."

	"Are you sure?" he asked.  I simply smiled and straddled his hips.
Grabbing one of his shoulders to for support, we both grimaced softly as he
pushed past the rigid muscles.  I tightly grabbed both of his shoulders and
bit my lip to stifle my emerging cries of discomfort.  My own manhood
betrayed my excitement, spasming between both of our stomachs.  Inhaling
sharply, I involuntary rose off him until he was securely inside me.  I
could feel the excited pounding of his own heart.

	"Is this okay?" he asked apprehensively as I leaned towards him.  Nodding,
the muscles of my neck contracted with the increasing intensity of each
thrust.  He grabbed my upper legs to steady me as my chest heaved, and *my*
heart felt as if it would explode in my chest.  The perspiration streamed
from my brow, and as we kissed, I could feel it pass onto his own face to
mingle with his own, much the way the sweat of our thighs was doing.  I
moaned softly as he did the same.

	With each movement, he lost himself in the moment as I drew in crisp
breaths every time he strained his hips against my own.  I gripped his pecs
tightly, so much so that I could feel warm liquid under my fingernails.  He
held onto me firmly, his thrusts becoming more and more chaotic.  He
trembled violently with a yell, his legs extending to rigidity and spiraling
both of us towards the floor.

	He held me fast to halt my descent, the powerful eruptions rippling through
every part of him and shutting his eyelids tight with determination.  I
locked my legs around his waist and hooked my arms around his neck and back.
  Ribbons of fluid shot between us, matting us together.

	"I love you," I told him, truly comprehending it more each day.

	He tried to speak, but a hoarse croak was all that issue forth between
pants.  "As soon as I'm able to talk again, I'll tell you how much you mean
to me."

	"You better," I laughed, collapsing even further against him as I drifted
into one of the most blissful sleeps I had ever known.




	Thunderous pounding echoed through my ears and I tried to force my
unwilling eyes to open.  When I finally did, the hazy numbers on the clock
became clear.  "SHIT!" I yelled, "Not again!"

	JC sat up with a start.  "What?!"

	"They're here to pick you up," was my answer, as I found myself scrambling
for my jeans, pausing just long enough to throw his pants to him.  I ran
through the house to the back door, tripping, stubbing my toe, and getting
my unbuttoned shirt hung on at least three pieces of furniture as I made my
way.  Finally flinging the door open, Justin just smiled at me, his hand
raised in a knocking motion.

	"Morning," he grinned broadly.

	"Fuck you," I smiled, turning to walk back into the living room.

	"Actually," Justin laughed, "judging by the way you're walking . . . ."

	Without stopping, turning, or missing a beat, "Finish that statement and
lose a testicle."

	He just smiled and plopped onto the couch.  "Yes, Miss Bueller."

	"Bitch," I growled as JC joined us, still clad only in his pants, but the
rest of his clothes in his arms.

	"DAMN!" Justin shouted.

	"What?" JC nervously asked, dropping his shoes and a few articles of
clothing.

	"Did you do that?" Justin asked me incredulously.  Finally, I followed his
gaze to the scabbed-over streaks across JC's chests and clamped my hand over
my mouth as my eyes went wide with wonder.

	Justin was laughing hysterically.  JC turned every shade of red I'd ever
seen.  "No shirtless shots for you, loverboy," Justin teased him.  "And if
you have any sense in that head of yours, you'll keep a shirt on whenever
you're around Chris or Joey until those go away."

	"Good advice," I finally smiled.  "Speaking of the bonehead brothers, where
are they?"

	"In the van out front.  I had a hunch you might need a few minutes to get
ready," he grinned at me.

	I just smiled and kissed his cheek.  "Okay, maybe you won't go to hell."

	"JC, your bitch is hitting on me," he giggled.

	"Then again, blondie, pack your sunscreen."

	"Okay, I'm ready," JC announced, bolting upright from his seat.  "I guess
we need to go."

	I cocked a half-smile at the pout on his face and agreed, "I guess so,"
before pulling him into a soft kiss.  Squeezing my arms around him, I
memorized every sensation before I heard Justin clear his throat.

	"You wanna tell the guys goodbye?" JC asked me.

	Shaking my head, "Nah, I'll wave at them from the window.  I hate goodbyes.
  Not enough practice." I reminded him.  "Just remember your promise."

	JC smiled at me.  "I'll be walking through that door the minute I'm able."

	"Crawl, if you must," I smiled.  "I'll take care of you."

	"Promises, promises," he smiled back at me, shutting the door behind him.




	The seconds away from him seemed like weeks, until finally, weeks were what
they became.  He called me everyday, usually several times.  In fact, it was
usually until one of the other guys physically came over and ended the call
for them.  I talked to them all endlessly, suddenly finding myself very
lonely.

	Sitting in my hospital room, I was waiting for them to come take me to
radiology when Bobby came in with a solemn look on his face.  "Mind if I sit
down?" he asked somberly.

	"I considered saying 'no,' just because I know that look, but what the
hell?  Make yourself at home," I tried to smile.

	"Wanna take a guess?" he looked at me, recalling an old game he and I used
to play.  "You get three guesses, . . . ."

	"But I'll only need one," I finished.  "The treatments aren't working."

	He couldn't even speak.  He just shook his head.

	"So what do we do now?" I asked optimistically.

	"We scrap everything we've been doing and start over," he sighed.

	"Then let's do it," I smiled.

	He raised an eyebrow at me.  "You're taking this remarkably well."

	"I've got something to live for."

	"Something or someone?" he grinned.

	"Pick one," I laughed.  "The name's the same either way."

	"Okay," he nodded.  "I still want you to get the radiation treatments,
though I'm gonna expand the mantle fields and change around the chemo."

	"So no more kids in my future?"

	"You think JC will mind?" he grinned back.  He gave my leg a squeeze.
"Don't give up on me, because I'm not giving up on you."

	"Not a problem."

	After Bobby left, I turned on the television to provide me with a
distraction.  It had no sooner turned it on when my cell phone rang.

	"Hello?"

	"Matty!" reverberated from the phone.

	"Hello, Chris," I smiled.  "Whazzup?"

	"Whazzup?" he repeated.  "Just seeing how you're doing."

	"No, you're not," I told him.  "I talked to you yesterday.  Small-talk
would have kept until Josh called me tonight.  I assume it's about him."

	"Yeah," Joey shouted into the phone.  "HE'S DRIVING US CRAZY!"

	All I could do was laugh.  "What's the matter, guys?"

	"We think, well, um, . . . ," Lance stammered.

	"We think he needs to get him some," Chris added.

	"Um, guys, I'm not really able to address that particular problem at this
time," I reminded him.

	"Nothing like that," Lance cut in.  "It's just, you two just talk about
stuff when you're on the phone."

	I chuckled.  "I'm sorry, Lance, I'd recite the Gettysburg Address if I
could remember it."

	"You know what I mean," I could hear him blush.

	"Actually," I assured him, "I haven't the foggiest notion."

	"I think it would help if he could just talk about how much he wants to be
with you," Lance told me.

	"As eloquently as you put that," I laughed, "you do realize what you're
talking about don't you?"

	"A digital get-down?" Joey offered.

	I just laughed into the phone.  "I guess that's one way to put it.  Tell
you what, tell him to check his voice-mail and call me tonight.  You guys
don't be around when he does."

	"DEAL!" they all answered in unison.  I just shook my head and closed the
phone.


	And the time continued to march forward.  Without JC physically by
my side, and without a job to go to everyday, I counted the minutes,
especially in the days and weeks following Bobby's disappointing news.
About the only thing to fill the gaps between JC's phone-calls was talking
to Kathy.  She was starting to show, and it made her miserable.  I, of
course, found that funny.

	I took off for one of my runs shortly after dawn one morning.  After
downing one of the protein shakes, I hit the asphalt.  A cool breeze helped
to invigorate me, but it just seemed to take longer than usual.  I felt as
though I would never get back to the house.  That was not a pleasant
prospect, considering the sharp muscle pains I was getting in my chest.  If
that weren't enough, severe cramping seized my stomach, and even the
moderate little inclines of the road forced my legs above and beyond.
Several times, I slowed myself to a casual walk.  I tried to at least
maintain a jog, but I just didn't have the strength for it.  Finally, the
end was in sight, and the shock waves shooting through my feet emanated from
my own driveway.  After fumbling with my keys for a few minutes, I got the
door open and headed into the living room under the fan, but that didn't
seem to help, and I started panting harder and harder.

	Finally, I struggled to stand, only to topple weakly to the floor.  Every
movement suddenly took everything I had, but I managed to pull myself along
the carpet to the kitchen, where I tugged on the phone cord.  I watched
helplessly as it hurdled to the floor, shattering into pieces.  Tears would
have welled in my eyes were I not trying vainly to press the unresponsive
numbers.  Unfortunately for me, there was no dial tone to carry my call for
help, and I didn't have time to get to another phone before my breathing
stopped and the world went black.


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