Date: Wed, 26 Mar 2003 21:09:16 -0600
From: Lance Lansdale <makeitgood17@msn.com>
Subject: Sixteen And Famous Chapter 4

Disclaimer: If you're too young, too old, or too straight please don't read
this. If you don't like N Sync don't read this. Or if you don't like me
don't read this, that and fuck off please :). I don't know N Ysnc or their
sexuality. All songs in this story and it's other chapters are c 2002/3
ME!!! or to the people I list at the bottom of the chapter.

-

Chapter 4


I woke up the next morning in what I took as a motel bed. I turned over to
see if Justin was lying beside me, sure enough he was sitting there. I
expected to see him staring at me again, but he was simply sitting down with
his legs folded together playing with his fingers. "Oh hey, Paul, you're
up." He said, turning to me. "How are you?" He asked.

"Well, I'm pretty cool. I'm still in shock a little." I said. "Where are we
J?" I asked, a little confused.

"Well, you remember last night remember?" He asked. I nodded. "I wanted to
take you home, but there were no plains headed to Florida yesterday or
today. So we're stuck in the backwoods boondocks until Thursday." He said
laughig. "Wanna watch some TV?" He asked.

"Ok, I guess. I think I'm just going to lie here though."

"Ok." He said. He switched on the TV and went pail.

"What's wrong J?" I asked.

"Nothing." He said, trying to switch off the tv, but the remote wasn't
really working that well, so it didn't switch off.

"Justin, I know you. We've been together for 3 weeks, I know when you're
upset." I said. I looked up to the TV, which was switched onto MTV. "Oh my
gosh, Justin." I said pointing to the TV. "The guys, they're singing on
TRL!" I yelled again. Justin nodded. "What about me?" I asked to no one in
particular.

About 3 hours later the phone rang and Justin answered. "No you can't talk
to him you fucking cunt!" I heard him say angrily.

I walked up to Justin and took the phone from his hand gently. "It's OK." I
said to Justin. Hello?" I asked into the receiver. "Uh huh, yeah, yeah I
need to think this over." I said. With that I hung up the phone. "They want
me back." I said to Justin.

"You can't be serious." He said.

"I told them I needed to think it over.

"What's to think over? They hate you Paul!" He said, his voice getting
louder.

"I know, but I mean, what am I going to do? I don't know what I want to do.
I mean it's not like I could make it on my own."

"Paul, you carried that group, the rest of them, they have a little talent,
but none can sing or write like you can." I said. I shook my head.

"I'm not that talented."

"Paul, don't tell me you can't see it? You're a star baby. You've got star
quality. They need you, that's whay they want you back." He said.

"Maybe, I don't know." I said. "I'm tired, I need to lie down." I said.

"Sure," He said, kissing my forehead. "Have you a good nap, and then we'll
go get some dinner." He said to me. I kissed him and went to the bedroom,
but I didn't lie
down. I took out a piece of paper from Justin's desk and started writting
him a note. I had to get out of here, I just couldn't think.

I went off to collect my thoughts, I just couldn't cope with all of this.


~Justin~

I walked into my room after 2 or 3 hours to check on Paul. I noticed the
window beside the bed was open, and the wind was blowing the curtain. I
looked down and saw a note.

Dear Justin,

I just want you to know that I love you, I really do. I just can't think
here.
I need to be alone, I just can't be with you right now. I'm too fucked up.
You deserve better than me.

Paul...

I quickly ran to my car and jetted off. I looked all the small town the
place for his car. I finally found it at a bar, which was weird because he
was only 16. I parked and burst into the doors. I saw Paul sitting there
talking to the bartender. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" I screamed.


~Paul~

Justin looked at me, like he was about to burst. "How the fuck could you do
that to me?" He asked. Just like a bad movie the band stopped, and everyone
looked our way. "I love you, and you just ran off. I mean, I could've helped
you, but did you want my help? No, you'd rather be alone. Fine, you want to
be alone? You've got it, I'm threw with you." He said harshly, and started
to leave. "That the hell are you looking at?" He screamed to the man at the
door. I couldn't leave it like this. He thinks I've got talent and my voice
can do anything?

"Here goes nothing." I said to myself. I ran up onto the stage. "Hi." I said
to the band on stage. "Look, I'll give you 20 bucks if you'll let me do as
song." I said. They nodded. "Just follow me." I said. Justin was almost out
the door when I started singing...


I would like to know why
There are clouds in the sky
Eerytime I fall in love
And i would like to know why I'm sitting here on my own
And I would like to know why
When I find a nice guy
Someone I can lean upon
I go and mess it up and then I wonder why I'm all alone


Suddenly the guitar player kicked in as well as the drummer


Just tell me if you think that I
I'm talking way too much
Tell me if you'd like to stay in touch

I would like to say that I
I never ment to make you cry
I think about you everyday
No matter what our friends might say
And everybody knows my name
But I know I'm still the same
I just would like to say that I
I never ever ment to make you cry


Justin looked up at me, a tear in his eye. I kept on singing.


Sittin on the sofa
Lettin life go by
thinkin bout the early days
Thinkin bout the times that I hurt you in my crazy ways
All I wanna do is look around for you, yeah
Drive until the break of dawn
Track you down cold, baby plead until you come on home

Tell me if you think that I, I've been a bit too much
Tell me if you'd like to stay in touch

I would like to say that I
I never ment to make you cry
I think about you everyday
No matter what our friends might say
And everybody knows my name
But I know I'm still the same
I just would like to say that I
I never ever ment to make you cry


Justin was almost crying now, as was I. I continued.


I didn't mean to be so cruel
I didn't mean to let you down
I'm sorry for all the rain on your parade and all of the blam that ya gained
because of me

I would like to say that I
I never ment to make you cry
I think about you everyday
No matter what our friends might say
And everybody knows my name
But I know I'm still the same
I just would like to say that I
I never ever ment to make you cry


I finally finneshed and looked up at Justin. Justin was still standing at
the door. For a second I thought i cought a glimpse of a smile, but he just
turned and walked out the door. It was over.

I walked to the motel about a bottle of vodka and 2 hours later. I could
hardly walk, and lord knows how I got home. I opened the door and found
Justin watching tv. I went straight to the bedroom and got my bag out. I
started packing my things as Justin walked in. He came up behind me and
hugged me, whispering he loved me in my ear. I turned to face him, lying my
head on his chest. "One second." he said. He walked to his CD player and put
in an orange cd. Suddenly a song came on. He came back to me and hugged me.
We started dancing to the slow, mellow song.


you were there for summer dreaming
and you are a friend indeed
and i know you'll find your freedom eventually
for eternity


"I love you." He said to me. I smiled up at him, but he turned and started
putting things into my bag.

"But, but Justin." I said.

"I can't be with you, Paul." He said. "I can't be with someone who might
leave me if things get tough, I'm in this for the long run. I want the whole
thing, I want the fairy tell, and I'm not going to settle for less." He said
coldly, placing a pair of my underwear in my bag.

"But that's what I want too Justin!" I screamed. "I want you, only you. I
don't want to settle for anything, or anyone else than you. It's you I
want." I said. He stopped. I was facing his back. He turned around smiling a
bit.

"That's what I wanted to hear." He said smiling, a tear escaping his eye. He
came to me and hugged me. "I only want you." He said. "And I don't want you
in a situation where you can get hurt when I can stop that." He said. "I
don't want you to hurt. You should never have to again." He said smiling. I
nodded.

"Well, there's no need to worry about that." I said smiling. I handed him a
piece of paper.

"What's this?" He asked.

"Before I went to the bar I went to my lawyer." I said.

"You have a lawyer?" He asked giggiling.

"Hehe, stop. Anyways, yes, I do. And I asked him to draw these up." I said
smiling.

Justin began reading aloud. "The party of the first part does here by...
blah, blah, blah." He said trailing off. I started laughing. "What does all
of this mean?" He asked. I took the paper from him and took it to the main
office.

"Do you have a fax machine?" I asked the man at the desk. He nodded. "Can
you send it to this number?" I asked, putting the piece of papper down, and
writting the number on it. He nodded. "Thanks." I said. Justin, who had
followed me to the office, followed me back to the room.

"What did you just do?" Justin asked when the door was shut.

"I... I just quit the band, Justin." I said smiling. Justin hugged me.

"I love you." He told me. "But what do you want to do now, a solo album?" He
asked.

"Actually, I was thinking of either going into acting and doing some
writting, maybe for a certain blonde hottie's solo album?" I said smiling.

"That'd work." He said laughing. Suddenly he got a bit upset.

"What is it J?" I asked.

"Why don't you want to sing though? You have an amazing voice." He said.

"I don't know." I confessed. "I just don't really want to do it that much."

"Don't lie. You told me just last week that singing was what made you
happiest in the world." He said,

"Ok, fine,y uo want to know the truth Justin?" I asked loudly. Justin
shivered a bit and nodded. "I'm scared, there. There you go, you've to your
answer. I'm scared, terrified
that I'll get up on that stage alone and I'll choke, or worse I'll be booed.
I can't do that Justin, I just can't." I said, a tear forming in my eye.

"You'll be fine. Just answer me this." He said. "Do you like singing?" I
nodded. "After being in the 'biz for about half a year do you still like
it?" I nodded again. "So after the rejection from the big timers, touring
with guys who hate you, and spending God knows how long wishing and hoping
for this dream you're going to let a few fears stand in
your way of your dream?" He asked.

"It's not that fucking easy, Justin." I screamed back.

Justin started getting a little louder as well this time. "You know," He
said loudly, "I thought I knew you. The Paul I knew wouldn't let a couple of
butterflies in his stomach get in the way of his dream!" He said.

"Fuck you!" I screamed.

"You know, you're right. You couldn't make it anyways." Justin said. I
gasped. "Just what America needs. Another gay popstar. What's speacial about
you anyways?"

"I could make it if I wanted to." I said sheepishly.

"Not with an attitude like that."

"Yes I could!" I said strong. "And I'll prove it." I said.

"Don't prove it to me."

"I won't. I'm going to get me a record deal, and I'm going to release an
album, and I'm going to show the world." I said strongly.

Justin walked over to me, put his arms around me and kissed me. "That's my
boy." He said smiling at me, kissing me.

"Were you fucking with me?" I asked, smiling at him.

"Someone had to." He said smiling. "I mean if I didn't, no one would. Then
no one would ever get to hear your beautiful voice." He said.


-

Songs...

"Cry" - A fantastic song by Kym Marsh from the UK band Hear'Say who were the
winners of the popstars tv series.

"Eternity" is by Robbie Williams.

-

Please email me telling me what you think, hehe.

-LaNcE...