Date: Mon, 3 Sep 2001 19:45:48 -0700 (PDT)
From: Mighty Aphrodite <nsaphrodite@yahoo.com>
Subject: Small Sacrifices finale

Small Sacrifices

Disclaimer:
Completely fictitious.

Rating:
NC-17 for content.

Website:
Visit  http://www.friendsnlovers.cjb.net for this story, "A Tale of Two
Boybands", "Golden Phoenix" and many more.

Author's Notes:
It was brought to my attention that I didn't post the last chapter of "Small
Sacrifices", so here it is- the conclusion to "Small Sacrifices".

Feedback:
nsaphrodite@yahoo.com- please.

Propaganda:
Vote! Vote *Nsync!  Vote for *Nsync for MTV VMA Viewer's Choice Awards at
http://www.mtv.com/onair/vma01/viewerschoice/index.jhtml

Shameless Plug:

Love the angst of "Small Sacrifices"? Check out "Golden Phoenix". Tired of
all the angst and drama? Check out "A Tale of Two Boybands"- the story that
established me as a slash writer.  Yahoo lists of interest: NSAngst at
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/NSAngst/ for angst driven slash and
Ndecent_Pleasures at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Ndecent_Pleasures/ for
bdms, etc.



Small Sacrifices XI

His eyes slowly fluttered open, wearily.  The visions before blurred until
he adjusted his eyes to the intense light peering through the windows.
Before him sat the best friends in the world.  Chris was sitting on the
foot of the bed while Joey was pouring water into the vase sprung with
beautiful satin pink roses.  Lance was sitting on the chair next to his
bed.  His fingers entwined in his for comfort- for safety.  Indeed, these
men were his best friends in the world.

"Good morning, sunshine." Joey teased, planting a soft kiss on Justin's
forehead.

"Where am I?" Justin struggled to sit up on his bed.  His eyes darted to
the IV drip next to his bed.  The tubes of morphine infusion inserted deep
into his veins.

"You're in the hospital, Justin." Lance informed him.  "You've been in and
out of consciousness for the past three days."

"I have?" Justin whimpered at the pain coursing through his body when he
attempted to shift in his bed.

"God! Justin!" Chris cried, pulling the boy into his arms.  "I was so
scared.  I didn't want anything to happen to you."

Justin rested his head on Chris's shoulder, rubbing his back soothingly.

"It's okay." Justin breathed.  "I'm okay now." Justin reassured the older
man- his best friend despite the ten years discrepancy between them.

At Justin's assurance, Chris finally released his younger friend into
Joey's waiting arms while Lance continued to massage gently in his hands.

"We were so scared for you.  You had lost a lot of blood." Lance explained.
"And then when you didn't wake up the first night, we were afraid that we
wouldn't see your brilliant smile anymore- you know that million dollar
smile.  They said that..." Lance's voice lace with emotions, "there was a
chance that you might not be returned to us...and we were all so scared."

"Lance." Justin broke free from Joey to envelope his best friend in his
arms.  "I'm here now.  And I'm not going anywhere." Justin said, softly,
tightening his grip around Lance's quivering body until Lance finally
calmed down.

With Lance still in his arms, Justin surveyed the hospital room painted in
soft crème hue.  He noticed flowers adorning his room and stuffed
animals scattered about the floor. He swiveled his head from side to side.
Alarmed by the absence of the one person he'd live his life for, Justin
pushed Lance away. He tore away the IV drip from his arms and struggled for
the side of the bed.

"Where are you going?" Joey asked, grabbing onto Justin.

"Josh!" Justin cried.  "Josh! Where is he?  I have to find him.  He
isn't...He isn't dead yet, is he?" Justin's boyish whisper receded into the
atmosphere around him.

"No." Lance assured him.  "No."

"'Cuz with all that I've been through, I don't think I can live without
Josh." Justin continued with his muffled cries as he cried into Joey's
chest.  "I have to see him."

"I know, Just.  You're doing fine.  He's fine." Joey whispered back,
tousling Justin's curls.

Justin nodded slightly. His eyes focused on the pen in Joey's shirt pocket.
He quickly abandoned Joey, grabbed the pen, and threw himself onto the
floor.  His three best friends all rushed to his aid.

"Get away from me!" Justin threatened with the pen aimed at his neck.
"Stay away from me!"

He shook violently as he continued to shed tears.  He struggled to his
feet, using the legs of the bed as support.  He held onto the bed to catch
his breath before turning around.  Chris, Joey, and Lance gasped in horror
at the damage to Justin's body exposed by the poorly constructed hospital
gown.  Black, blue, purple blotches painted all over Justin's body, but
nothing more painful to look than the damage inflicted to Justin's lower
body.  He was literally torn apart.  Justin stumbled his way toward the
door, pausing to catch his breath again.  Every movement was excruciatingly
painful to take.  He bit his lips to prevent any more cries from escaping
his lips, but the pain was too much to bear and he collapsed onto the hard
tiled floor.  His three best friends rushed to his aid.

"Take me to him.  Please take me to Josh!  I need to know he's alright.
He's my savior."  Justin begged, tugging at Joey's shirtsleeve until Joey
reluctantly agreed.

Lance handed Joey a thin cotton sheet.  Joey wrapped the sheet over
Justin's body before scooping the lighter boy in his arms.  Together, the
four best friends, marched their way to find JC.


Justin refused to leave his boyfriend's side.  Still aching from his ordeal
earlier in the night, he remained stagnant in the chair beside JC's bed.
JC had undergone mass surgery to repair the wound to his pharynx.  When
Kevin had thrust the sword into his neck, he had meticulously avoided all
the major arteries.  Instead of killing his once lover, Kevin severed his
larynx- his vocal box, rendering him speechless.  Justin was grateful to
Kevin for sparing his boyfriend's life, but as he sat there in the hospital
room, waiting and waiting, he wandered if JC would rather be dead.  His
voice.  His music.  His life.  Gone.  During this moment of reflection upon
their life together, Justin came to a decision that he could not live
without JC.  They were going to be together- be it heaven or hell, Justin
was going to follow him through.  Death would just be another sacrifice he
had to make for the sake of their love.

Nearly an hour later, JC's eyes began to flutter open.  Justin waited an
eternity it seemed for to see those sparkling blue eyes once more.  This
time, there was no spark.  Only tears.

"Hi, Josh." Justin leaned over his boyfriend to kiss

JC gave Justin's hand a gentle squeeze.  He brought Justin's hand to his
lips and kissed it softly, relishing Justin's sweet taste between his lips.
He pried open Justin's closed fist and drew on the palm of his hand.  His
requests- a pen and a piece of paper.  Justin quickly wheeled his way to
the dresser beside JC's bed.  He opened the drawer and rummaged around for
a writing tablet and a pen.  He returned to JC's bedside with the two
requested items and placed them on JC's laps.

Thank You.  JC wrote.

"You're welcome, Josh." Justin smiled weakly back at JC.  "I can get you
anything else?"

JC shook his head and smiled back at his boyfriend.  He squeezed Justin's
hands in his.  With his free hand, he scribbled a message to Justin.

"Just stay here."

Justin nodded.  His lips trembled as tears began to cascade down his
porcelain face.  Before long, he buried his face in JC's chest, holding
onto his boyfriend tightly.  JC rubbed Justin's back and kissed his
forehead.  He lifted Justin's chin and leaned in to place another gentle
kiss- this time on his lips.

"I'm so sorry."

JC's eyebrows furrowed in response to Justin's apologies.  He returned to
the writing tablet and asked, "Why?"

"Because.  Because of me, your beautiful, beautiful," Justin stuttered,
painfully feeling the bandage on JC's neck, "voice is no more.  Josh, you
can't sing anymore all because of me.  I should just go away." Justin
motioned himself to jet out of the room when JC grabbed his wrist and
pulled him back toward him.  "But why, Josh?  Why don't you hate me?  If it
wasn't for me, you wouldn't be lying here in the hospital.  Why did you do
it? Now you can't talk.  You can't ever sing, again? Your music gone
forever."

JC shook his head, baffled by Justin's words.  Did he not know that he
meant the world to him?  He reached for Justin's face. His hands cupped his
boyfriend's face.  His fingers wiped away the tears that graced Justin's
porcelain face.  He removed his hands from Justin's face after placing two
fingers on his quivering lips.

"No," JC wrote on the parched paper, "My music hasn't gone anywhere.
Justin, you are the music of my life.  You inspire me everyday with your
existence.  Your sweet voice serenades me.  The mere beating of your heart
is music to my ears.  Justin, that was a small sacrifice to make to still
hear the music of your heart.  Justin Randall Timberlake, I love you,
always and forever."

Always and forever.  Joshua Scott Chasez couldn't be more content with the
sacrifice he made.  Losing his voice was a small sacrifice to make for
keeping the music of his life.  Justin Randall Timberlake.


copyright Aphrodite for Friends & Lovers Site