Date: Tue, 27 Dec 2005 18:00:25 +0000 (GMT)
From: Jezebel <eh_oh_po@yahoo.com>
Subject: Star Encounter 8

Title: Star Encounter
Author: Jezebel
Feedback: eh_oh_po@yahoo.com

Disclaimers: I do not know any of the celebrities mentioned herein, this
has no element of truth to it.  This is no reflection on their true
sexualities or personalities of any people mentioned..  If you are underage
for your area or if it is illegal for you to look at this why not go
somewhere else, if you don't like the thought of two men together in a
loving, sexual way this isn't for you either.

***

The tour continued on with Justin happier than he had been and Johnny was
glad to see that his stars were finally beginning to work well again.  News
had reached Johnny that Justin and Maya were not together, although Lonnie
swore that it was not he that had told him, and the restrictions for
visitors were eased.  Justin and Josh were getting back on friendly terms,
and Justin was just about ready to trust Josh with his secret.  The only
thing different was that Chris was driving Justin crazy with questions and
queries about when they would get to see Brandon again.  Justin wished he
knew when he would get to see his lover again but they both had commitments
and neither of them could get out of them.

Justin spoke to Brandon daily, sometimes twice or three times a day.  Mostly
they were short calls from between interviews, recording sessions or concerts
when Justin could find the time, but at night they would have long, furtive calls
that made Justin blush the next day when he thought of them.  At night Justin
would dream about the night in the cabin, or Vegas or Chicago but he knew
that this was not enough.  He wanted more than a collection of one night
stands with the man that he loved.

Brandon had a looser schedule than Justin, not needing to do as much
promotional work and refusing all but the best publications and programmes
for interviews.  It was Justin that was the one with the tight schedule so he
knew that it was mostly his fault that they did not see more of each other.  At
least that was how it felt.  So, Justin knew that it was up to him to work out
how he could see Brandon.

One way came straight to mind.

"Justin, I can't just give you a fortnight off without knowing why." Johnny said
as Justin put in the request the next time their manager was visiting.  "Time is
money in this industry and if you think for one moment that Nsync will stay on
top without some hard work..."

"Of course I don't think that." Justin replied.  "I'm the one whose out there
every night doing the hard work to keep us on top.  Do you know how long it's
been since I had a decent night's sleep?  Or how long its been since I didn't
wake up and have to think about work."

Johnny opened his mouth but Justin was not finished.

"You want a reason why I need some time off, the truth is that I'm tired, I'm
frustrated and I'm starting to wonder why we do this.  The reason that I want a
fortnight off is to see if this is worth it anymore."

"You can't leave the band, Justin, you have a contract with me, with Nsync.  If
you walk out you won't work in this industry again."

Justin sighed.

The threats were real enough but they weren't threats really.  In order for
there to be a threat you needed to fear for what someone was taking away
from you.

"That's just it." Justin replied.  "I'm not sure I want to work in this industry
anymore."

Johnny saw the truth in Justin's eyes and felt a pain in his wallet as he thought
of the trauma of losing Justin and in doing so losing Nsync.  Justin did not
make up the band but without him he was certain the other boys would not
want to perform.  The had started this as a five piece, Nsync worked as a five
piece and he didn't think that as a foursome they would gel.

"I'll need some time to arrange it." Johnny replied.

"How about at the end of the tour?" Justin asked, it was two months away and
he knew that they were scheduled for some recording time.  They could still
do that he would just push it back a few weeks.  "You can tell the press that
we're taking some time to write the album."

Johnny nodded.  He should have known that Justin would have planned this
out.  Would have worked out when and how he could make this a reality
because when Justin wanted something he knew exactly how to get it.

Justin smiled to himself as he left, knowing that threatening to leave the band
had been the way to go.  He hadn't really meant it but he knew that if he said
the words Johnny would let him have the time.  He was tired and bored with
touring but Justin didn't think he would ever give up this life.  He hoped that
not one ever asked him to choose.  Now all he had to do was speak with
Brandon and arrange some time together.

***

Justin hadn't spoken with Maya since his trip home to Florida.  He had tried to
distance himself and he knew that a call would be unexpected but he wanted
to check Brandon's itinerary without him becoming suspicious.  While he
would have to speak to Brandon about it eventually there was something else
that he was planning on doing that he didn't want Brandon to know about
because they would have the same conversation that they always had and
Justin didn't want to have to try and explain himself yet.

"Well, this is a surprise." Maya said as she answered her phone.  "I thought
that I was persona non grata in your circles these days."

"I'm sorry." Justin said.  "I've been busy."

"It's okay, Justin." Maya said.  "I understand."

"It's not you, it's just..."

"I get it." Maya said, cutting Justin off before he could continue.  "I was getting
too close to you and I was getting in the way."

"Maya, I..."

"No.  No apologies necessary." She said.  "Now, what can I do for you?  I
assume that you're not just calling for a social chat, because we don't do
those anymore."

Justin felt guilty that he was just calling her to ask a favour but he knew that
Maya would agree to do it when she found out that the reason that Justin
needed help was so he and Brandon could spend time together.

"I need a favour." He said.  "Can you let me know what Brandon is doing in
eight weeks time.  I was hoping to book in some time to see him."

"Justin, if you speak to Brandon he'll clear space in his schedule for you.  Did
you have a free evening?"

"No." Justin said.  "I've got a couple of weeks off and I wanted to spend them
with him.  It doesn't matter if he's working, I just want to be with him."

"You're lucky.  Brandon was aiming on putting in some studio time so he's
likely to be free.  The album is doing well and the stadium tour won't be ready
for at least a few months yet.  After that he will probably be tied up for three or
four months playing live concerts."

"I know." Justin said.

He had timed his request with Johnny to not only coincide with the end of they
own tour but to make sure that it fell before Brandon's.  If the timing hadn't
been right he would still have wanted to visit Brandon but it would be far too
much of a busman's holiday if he were to go on tour with his lover after having
just finished a trip of his own.

"Is this a surprise, or can I give him a rough idea what I'm doing?" Maya
asked.  "He'll be suspicious if I pencil him out for two weeks and we're still
working on him trusting me to book his appointments."

Justin knew that was because she had nearly outed them in Orlando, she had
outed them to Chris.  Brandon had been disappointed in her and Justin knew
if his Mom had done something like that to him he would reconsider the
control she had over his career.  It might be a long time before Brandon could
trust Maya again.

"I'll talk to him in the next few days, but there are a few other things that I
need to get in place first.  I want to make it special, to book somewhere that
we can be alone for a while so that we can really enjoy the time together
without having to worry about anything else."

"Including me." Maya added humourlessly.

Justin didn't insult her by trying to deny it.  He was going to leave the band
behind and Brandon was going to leave his sister.  There were things that
they all wanted to escape and these were two of the biggest obstacles in their
relationship.  One of the things that Justin had to do was square his time off
with the boys.

"Don't worry." Maya said.  "I understand.  I won't tell him anything just yet, you
would be surprised at how good at obfuscating I have gotten."  With that she
hung up and Justin was left thinking over just how good a liar she must be.
She had fooled dozens of people into thinking that she was an innocent young
woman and she constantly outwitted journalists in hiding the fact that she was
Brandon's sister.  It would be good to have her on his side.  Justin was glad
that they had at least come to an uneasy truce.  The last thing he wanted was
her to be working against him.

***

***

Justin took one last look at himself in the mirror and headed out.  It wasn't that
he needed to look good for what was coming but he had been practising his
speech in front of the mirror, trying to make sure that he had the words that he
wanted to say ready and was prepared for any questions that he might get
asked.  He was about to face the most difficult grilling of his life with his most
difficult audience.  How was he going to face the four most important men in
his life to explain his decision to them?

Johnny had called the meeting.  It was not unusual for him to gather the five
of them together near the end of a tour to talk about how they were doing and
what they were going to do afterwards but the timing of this one, with still 2
months to go, seemed strange and had warranted a few raised eyebrows
when Lance had mentioned it.

Justin hadn't been surprised but he had a sinking feeling in his stomach that
had worsened to a ache of fear as he realised that the meeting would be his
chance to speak up.

He entered the room and found that the other four were already seated, even
Chris who was not known for his punctuality was there.

"Well, now that the guest of honour has arrived, can we get started?" Josh
asked.  Justin was not used to this tone from his best friend.  He sounded
bitter and sarcastic and while they had fallen out over Maya Justin thought
that they had been making progress in being friends again.  Perhaps he had
been wrong.

"What is this about?" Lance asked, worried that there was some unspoken
argument between Justin and Josh that he was not privy too.  If they were
arguing it would make performing difficult.

No one spoke for a moment.

"Why don't you tell us, Justin." Josh said caustically.  "You were the one that
asked for this meeting after all."

"Johnny called the meeting." Justin said uneasily, already feeling as if he was
losing control.

"Yes, but we both know the reason for it." Josh countered.

Everyone else watched the exchange and realised that whatever this was it
was something that only Josh and Justin knew.  They waited to see if Justin
would retaliate but Johnny walked in and noticing the tension decided to start
straight away.

"Thanks for coming here guys, I know that you have things that you would
rather be doing with your free evening." Johnny said.  "I want you all to know
that you're doing really well, the tour is running smoothly and we are sold out
from now until the last night."

"Why are we here?" Chris asked.  He had witnessed the argument between
Josh and Justin and knew that this was about more than the tour.

"Chris..." Lance chided, knowing that Johnny was trying to break whatever
news it was to them easily.  He envisaged it being another problem with the
record company, or worse with Transcon.

"Look, I..."  Johnny began.

Josh stopped him.

"We're here so that Johnny can break the news to us that Justin is leaving the
band." Josh said.

"What?" Joey asked, shocked from his silence.

"You can't be serious." Chris said.  He looked to Justin and saw the flash of
shame and embarrassment colouring his cheeks.

"I called the meeting to let you know that we are allowing you some time off at
the end of the tour." Johnny said.

"Yeah, so Justin can consider leaving the band." Josh pushed.

"It's not like that." Justin said.

"Then what is it like?" Josh asked.  "Tell us why you suddenly want out of the
band, why you suddenly want to risk everything that we've worked for over the
last seven years so that you can take a few weeks out to consider your
options."

"I've met someone." Justin said.

Chris looked down at his feet and surprised the others.

"You knew about this?" Joey asked Chris softly.

Chris shrugged.

"So, what's wrong?" Lance asked, wanting to know why this changed things.
"You've dated before.  It was never an issue."

"It's made me rethink a few things, like how much time I spend with the band,
and how little free time I have for myself."

"Is this about Maya?" Lance asked.  "I know that it upset you when she broke
it off but..."

"It's not Maya." Justin said, cutting Lance off.

"Then why?"

"I want to spend some more time with..." Justin stopped, looking for a pronoun
that didn't give him away, then he realised that he was doing this all wrong
and that he didn't have to hide this.  He had planned to use the meeting to tell
the boys and this was his chance.  "I want to spend some more time with him
so that I can work out where I am in my life and where I want this to go.  It's
still new but it's serious and I think we deserve a chance to find out what we
mean to each other."

"Him?" Lance asked.

"You knew about this?" Joey asked Chris, louder this time so that everyone
would hear.

Again Chris shrugged.

"Don't blame Chris for this." Justin said.  "He only found out by accident
because he saw me with him."

"Is he worth throwing your career away for?" Josh asked, staring at Justin.

This was not homophobia that Justin was seeing, the hate was coming from a
much deeper place in JC's past where he feared that no matter what he did
everyone he loved would leave him eventually.  It was obvious that Josh
thought that Justin would walk out on him just as his mother had done, just as
Bobbie had done and the countless other women he had dated since then.
Josh and Justin weren't dating but they were as close as brothers and no one
else had ever been given so much of JC's trust.

"I'm not throwing it away, Jayce." Justin said.  "I'm just taking some time."

"If anything it will enhance your career." Chris commented, not thinking about
what he was revealing.

Justin sighed.  He had hoped that he would not have to reveal all of his
secrets at this meeting but apparently now the cat was out of the bag Chris
wanted to discuss it openly.  He was going to have to lay all of his cards on
the table if he wanted to succeed.

"What do you mean?" Josh asked.

Chris, belatedly realising that he might have said too much, refused to
answer.

"What does he mean?"

"This guy.  My boyfriend." Justin said.   "He's in the industry."

"Who is he?" Josh pushed further.  "How do you know he's not just using
you?"

"Brandon Taylor." Justin said, knowing that this would alleviate fears that
Brandon was using him for his fame.  If anyone thought that then it would be
him that they accused.

There were several gasps, including Johnny.

A pin could have dropped and they would have shushed it for daring to break
the silence.

Justin stood and turned to leave.

"Justin, wait..." Johnny called.  "You can't just drop a bombshell like that and
then walk out of here."

"Let him go." Chris said.  "There'll be time enough for explanations later."

"It's alright for you." Joey argued.  "You already knew about this."

Justin blocked out their conversation and left the room.  Chris was right, there
was time enough for explanations later.  For now all he wanted to do was call
Brandon and tell him that he had done it.  Then they could start planning for
their time together.

***

***

Justin let out a shaky breath and made sure that the hotel room door was
locked behind him before he flipped open his phone.  He pressed the memory
button, number 3 after his Mom and Dad, and waited for the ring tone.

"Hello?" A voice answered.  Brandon sounded a little out of breath, as if he
had run for the phone, or as if he had been practising a set.

"Am I disturbing you?" Justin asked, his voice still slightly shaky.  Brandon
must have sensed it because Justin heard a door close and him take a seat.

"No." Brandon said.  "I was just working out.  What's up?"  The concern in his
voice told Justin that he definitely know that something was wrong.

"I told them." Justin said, the words sounding more hollow than he meant
them to be.

"Told who?" Brandon asked.

"The boys." Justin said.  "I told them about us."

"Oh?"

"They took it well, I just...I wanted to tell you."

"What made you tell them now?" Brandon asked, his curiosity peaked as to
why he had done it now when Justin had been so reluctant a few weeks
before.  "Was Chris putting pressure on you?"

"No." Justin replied.  "He's been close-lipped about the whole thing, but
seeing you in Orlando made me want to see you again."

"And Johnny is going to let me come out to see you now he knows it's me?"
Brandon asked suspiciously.  He didn't mean to be distrustful but he was
guarding their relationship and would not allow it to be used to further
anyone's career, especially not if it was Johnny Wright's career and not
Justin's.

"I didn't ask." Justin said.  "But, I did speak to him.  I asked for some time off."

"That's great." Brandon replied.  "Did you want to meet up for a few days?"

"I asked for more than a few days." Justin said.

"How did you manage that?" Brandon asked, knowing how tight the Nsync
schedule was.  Justin always complained that they rarely had time to sit down
for dinner, let alone take a day off.

Justin took a deep, shaky breath and then spoke.

"I told him that I was thinking of leaving the band, that I wasn't sure it was
worth it anymore and that I needed time to take stock of my life and re-
evaluate what my career meant to me."

"Justin..." Brandon started.

"I didn't only do it to get some time off, I really do need to think about what is
important to me."

"Music is important to you." Brandon replied.

"So are you." Justin answered.

"Nothing is worth risking your career over, not even me." Brandon said.  "If
anything I should know that because I so nearly threw my own away over
something stupid."

"It's not stupid to love you." Justin said.  "And I'm not risking my career, I
just...I have more important things than touring to worry about now and I need
some space."

Brandon misjudged Justin's meaning.

"J, if you need space you only need to ask."

"Not from you." Justin interrupted.  "Space from everything else, I just want to
be able to lock the world out and be normal for a few weeks.  To spend some
time with you where no one cares that you're Brandon Taylor and I'm Justin
Timberlake and I know it's dumb to think that I can do that because everyone
in the world knows who you are but maybe we can capture at least a little time
to ourselves."

"What if I said I could arrange it so that we had some time alone?" Brandon
said.

"Are you going to stop the world from turning?" Justin asked.  "Or maybe find
a nice little hotel in Antarctica?"

"No, but I might be able to arrange a private place just for us." He replied.
"When were you thinking of?"

"The tour finishes up in 2 months, and I know you are free then." Justin said.

Brandon laughed.

"Leave it with me.  I'll organise everything and make sure that we're not
disturbed."

"Thanks."

"Getting to spend some time alone with you is more than enough thanks."
Brandon replied.  "Good Luck with the boys, call me if you need me, it doesn't
matter what time."

"I love you." Justin said before hanging up.  It didn't matter what time he
called, Justin knew that Brandon would take the call, he would probably even
come off stage for it although Justin didn't want to test that theory.  He was
glad that Brandon had accepted his need for them to be alone and glad that
he had taken on the responsibility of organising everything.  He could trust
Brandon and he would have enough to worry about trying to answer all of the
questions that he was sure that the boys would throw at him.  He would
tolerate it because he had something to look forward to and for the first time in
a long time he could not wait for the end of the tour.

***

TBC