Date: Tue, 23 May 2000 19:00:43 EDT
From: BrwyMilo@aol.com
Subject: "Still Breathing"

    Hey guys.  This is Mike, the guy who writes "Nick and Justin".  This is
another effort of mine I started a while ago but never really picked up.
It's a little different than the other series, so I thought I'd put it out
and see what happens.  Give it a look and let me know what you think.  Also,
Nick and Justin will be continued.  This is just gonna be a side effort, so
to speak.  So, I hope everyone enjoys it

    This story isn't meant to imply anything about anyone.  It's all fiction.
 Sorry guys.  =)

    If you have any questions, comments, etc, send them to Mike at
BrwyMilo@aol.com.  Thanks for reading and enjoy the story.

                    *****

    The rain pounded against the pavement as people huddled under their
umbrellas, trying desperately to avoid getting drenched.  Raincoats and hats
were tossed about in the strong winds.  The sun was nowhere to be seen.
Instead, a layer of dark clouds hung over everything ominously, cloaking the
Toronto landscape in darkness.

    This was the scene Justin saw outside his hotel window.  He sat with his
chin on the window ledge, looking to the outside world as if he were a child
who wanted to go out and play, but couldn't because of the weather. He
twirled one of his many curls around his index finger as he sat, breathing
slow and rhythmically.  With a sigh he stood, stretching his back as he rose.
 He rubbed his hands down his chest and yawned loudly.  He slowly walked over
to his suitcase and pulled out a black t-shirt and pair of jeans.  He sat
down on his bed, the clothes lying next to him.  Another glance out the
window showed that in all likelihood, the rain would not be stopping anytime
soon.

    "Why does it have to rain on our only day off," he asked himself with a
sigh.  Moving slowly, he pulled the shirt on over his head.  He stood up and
pulled the jeans on in equal tempo.  After a quick glance in the mirror, he
decided he looked alright.  He walked out of his room and down the hall,
stopping at Lance's.  He knocked loudly and waited for a sign from inside.
After a few seconds, the door opened.

    "Wow.  Why are you so dressed up," Justin asked as he looked over what
Lance was wearing.  It consisted of black Armani suit pants and a black silk
shirt.

    "I was actually just about to call you.  Since it's raining today, the
photo shoot got moved up and we're going to have tomorrow off."

    Justin stared at him for a second.  "But I thought today was booked," he
said.

    "Well, it is technically.  Supposedly the Backstreet Boys are getting
some promotional shots done today, but the photographer called and said it
would be alright if we came by too."

    "That's odd," Justin said.  "If they're taking shots of them, why would
they call us and tell us to come too?"

    "I have no idea," Lance replied.  He took a look at Justin then down at
himself.  "I think I'm gonna change into something more comfortable," he said
with a laugh.

    "No you look nice," Justin said with a grin.  "Maybe I should change.  I
must look like a pig right now."

    "No, you look great," Lance said.  "Besides, they have clothes for us at
the shoot, so I shouldn't be wearing this stuff anyway.  We're going to be
meeting in the lobby in half an hour I guess, so I'll see you then." Lance
gave him a smile and then closed the door, leaving Justin in the hallway.

    Justin walked back to his room, a huge smile painted across his face.
'The Backstreet Boys,' he thought to himself as he reached his door. 'I
haven't seen any of them in so long.'  His thoughts drifted whistfully back
to their last meeting.  He quickly walked into his room and into the
bathroom.  After drenching his hair, he put some gel in it, styling it as he
went.  He walked back to his suitcase and pulled out a tight fitting light
blue t-shirt.  He stood in front of the mirror and looked carefully.  One of
his curls was a bit out of place.  He groaned and fixed it with his fingers,
careful not to dent or damage any of the rest of it.  Finally, he was happy
with what he saw.  He walked out of his room and down into the lobby to meet
the rest of the guys.

    "You changed too," Lance said as soon as he saw him.

    "Yea, I spilled something on my other shirt," Justin lied.  He looked
around quickly.  "Where's JC," he asked.

    "He'll be down in a minute," Lance said.  "He needed extra time making
himself beautiful."

    "Hey, I heard that," JC said as he walked over to them.  He wore a pair
of khakis and a black sweater vest, showing off his arms and chest. "So,
let's get going then."

    "Yea, we don't want to miss anything," Justin said under his breath as he
walked excitedly towards the door.

                        *****

    "Nick, you look fine," Brian said with a groan as he struggled to see
past his taller friend into the mirror, the only one that was currently
available.  Finally, he plopped down on the couch and put his feet up.  "Why
don't you just wake me when you're done?"

    "I'm done, I'm done," Nick laughed as he stepped away from the mirror.
"Why are they making us wear these stupid costumes again?"  He wore a pair of
tight fitting black pants and a leather vest.  His hair was left hanging in
front of his face.

    "Promotions," Brian groaned as he stood up and walked over to the mirror.
 "The less you wear and the tighter you wear what you do have to wear the
better."

    "I guess," Nick replied as he sat down on the couch.  He watched as Brian
fixed his hair in front of the mirror.  He took a step back and fixed his
shirt.

    "Well, how do I look," he asked with a grin as he turned to Nick.

    "Beautiful," Nick replied.  "Wait a second.  Turn around."  Brian gave
him a funny look, but did as he was asked.  Nick watched his ass as he moved.
"Very very nice."

    "Are you always this horny," Brian laughed as he walked over to where
Nick was sitting.  He sat down next to him and wrapped his arms around Nick,
pulling him in close.  Nick smiled up at him and gently kissed his cheek.
Brian pulled back a bit, a frown on his face.  With a sigh he untangled his
arms from around Nick and stood up.  "We should be going," Brian said as he
walked away from the couch.  "The others are probably waiting."

    Nick watched Brian with amazement as he walked out of the room. 'What
happened,' Nick asked himself.  His thoughts flew back to the recent nights
he had spent with Brian.  He had seemed distant, even cold. He remembered the
early days of their relationship fondly.  Brian standing in the rain, telling
him he loved him.  Brian surprising him on his birthday.  Brian pushing him
into the pool, but then falling in after him, kissing him as the rose from
under the water.  He slowly stood and walked back towards the mirror.  "Could
it be that he doesn't love me anymore," Nick asked.  He stared at his
reflection long and hard.  He had grown up a lot from the early days of the
band.  He wasn't the skinny little blond boy with the squeaky voice anymore.
'Maybe that's what he liked,' Nick thought sadly. He took one final look at
himself before turning away.  He walked towards the door and closed it
tightly behind him, leaving the light on.

                    *****

    "Come on Brian, give me more," the photographer yelled as he snapped.
Brian grinned widely and put his hands out in front of him. "Better.  Now be
silly."  Brian stood there for a moment before he started jumping around.

    "I'm getting too old for this Dave," he yelled from the platform he was
standing on.  "Next time, think mature and serious."

    "You still look like a teenager Brian," Dave laughed as he continuously
took pictures.  "And from what Kevin tells me, you still act like one.

    "Remind me to kill Kevin later," Brian said as he finished jumping
around. He scanned the area and saw Nick and Howie hanging out.  Nick was
watching Brain closely, smiling widely as he watched Brian jump around. Brian
frowned a bit, but shook his head and remembered where he was.  He smiled
back and then looked to the camera.

    There was a noise in the back.  Brian looked up and saw someone enter.
He stopped where he was and watched as the person walked closer and closer to
the front.  He paused as he reached Nick and Howie, extending a hand to each
of them.  He motioned to the back and Brian saw Nick nod his head.  'What's
Justin doing here," Brian asked as he watched.

    "Brian, you with us," Dave asked as he waved his hand around in the air.
"Do you need a break?"

    Brian snapped back into awareness and turned a bright shade of red.
"Sorry Dave.  Yea, I'm here," Brian grinned.

    "Good, we've got a lot to do.  Now, flirt."  He saw Brian turn even
redder.  "Oh come on, you know you love to make those eight year old girls
scream."

    "Yep, drives me wild," Brian replied sarcastically.  He pulled up one end
of his shirt and threw his head back.  He glanced out at where Nick and
Justin were sitting and noticed that both had their eyes fixated on him.
'Let's take advantage of this opportunity,' Brian mused to himself.  He went
from pose to pose, flirting shameless with not only the camera as he went. He
would occasionally throw a look in Justin and Nick's direction, but for the
most part he stared straight ahead.

    "Ok, well that should give some girls very pleasant dreams," Dave said as
he put his camera down.  "Nick, you're gonna be up next.  Howie go get
changed."  Dave turned and saw Justin standing there.  "Hey Justin.  How are
you doing?"

    "Pretty good Dave," Justin replied as he shook his hand.  He glanced over
and saw Brian walking down off the platform.

    "So, where are the others," Dave asked, oblivious to Justin's stares.

    "They're getting changed.  I don't take long to get dressed," Justin
replied.

    "Well cool.  You'll get to go soon then."  Dave looked and saw Brian
approaching.  "Why don't you hang out with Brian until Nick is done."

    Justin turned bright red as Brian walked over and stood next to him.
"Sure, I'll entertain him," Brian said with a laugh as he put his arm around
Justin's shoulder.

    "Oh that can't be good," Dave said with a laugh.  He looked over at Nick
and yelled through cupped hands.  "Come on Nick.  Get your ass up there."

    Nick stood up slowly and walked over to where Brian and Justin stood.
"Are you going to wait here," Nick asked sheepishly.

    "Huh," Brian asked as he looked away from Justin.

    "I asked if you were going to wait in here...you know, for me to finish."
 Nick frowned and had to control his voice from wavering.  He noticed Brian's
arm around Justin's shoulders and was forced to look away.  Brian was smiling
so warmly.  He didn't even know Justin that well.  They had met each other
only a few times, and most of them had been business meetings. How could they
be so friendly?

    "Of course.  I have to keep Justin entertained.  We're gonna laugh at
you," Brian said sarcastically as he gave Nick a grin.  Nick managed a small
smile back and walked up the platform.

    "So, what are we gonna do," Justin asked.

    "We are going to sit here and I'm going to ask you questions and you're
going to answer them," Brian said quickly with a laugh.  "That should keep
you entertained, right?"

    "Yea, I guess," Justin laughed back.

    "I mean, I already know all about you from Teen Beat," Brian laughed.

    Justin turned bright red and burst out laughing.  "You did not read that
article," Justin laughed out as he sat down on the ground.

    "Oh you know I did," Brian laughed.  "So, you sleep with a Winnie the
Pooh bear?"

    "Will you shut up," Justin said as he looked down at the ground.  "I
haven't in years.  That was taken out of context,"

    "Sure it was," Brian said with a huge grin.  He looked carefully over
Justin's face.  'He looks so beautiful,' Brian thought to himself.  Justin
noticed Brian staring at him and looked down to the floor, his face a bit
red.  "You know, if you get any redder, I'm gonna start calling you Tomato
Boy."

    "Alright, alright," Justin said.  "Yea, so I used to sleep with a winnie
the pooh.  Better than that night light I heard you have."

    "That was a low blow," Brian laughed as he fell back.  He quickly
regained his composure.  "So, is it true about you and Britney," Brian asked,
a bit more seriously.

    Justin burst out laughing.  "God no," he said through tears.  "When we
were on MMC together I used to run away from her because she'd try to kiss
me. Then of course I would get coodies and that would be horrible."

    "Oh, the dreaded coodie defense," Brian laughed.

    "Hey it works," Justin replied with a shrug.  The two continued talking,
acting as if they had been best friends for years.  At some points, Brian
would place his hand on Justin's shoulder as he laughed and Justin would fall
forward onto Brian's leg.

    "Nick, you have to smile at some point," Dave said as he held the camera.
Nick watched Brian and Justin carefully, feeling pangs of jealousy as the two
laughed.  'That's just how we used to be,' Nick though to himself sadly.

    Dave's voice snapped him back to reality.

    "Sorry," Nick said with a small grin.

    "I said smile.  Show me some teeth."  Nick did his best to smile happily
for the camera and for the millions of people who would likely see these
pictures, but it's hard to seem happy when all you can think about is your
lover slipping away.

    Kevin stepped out into the photo area and took a quick look around.
There were the usual array of photographers, a few fans and friends, lots of
crew.  He took a look at the platform.  Nick stood there sullenly, staring
off into space.  'What the hell is going on,' Kevin asked himself.  He walked
to the front, just in front of the platform.

    "Dave, what's going on," Kevin asked.  Nick looked down at him and
sighed. He put his head down and just looked from person to person.

    "I was just going to ask you the same thing," Dave said.  "Is he feeling
alright?  Was he sick this morning or something?"

    "No, he was fine last time I saw him," Kevin said.  He heard laughter
behind him.  He turned around and saw Brian and Justin laughing loudly.  He
glanced from them to Nick and back again.  Nick noticed what Kevin was doing
and got a scared look on his face.

    "So, if you can do anything to-" Dave was interrupted by Kevin raising
his hand.

    "I'll talk to him.  Why don't you get Howie done while I do that," Kevin
said as he noticed Howie walking in.  "I'll take care of Nick."

    Kevin slowly walked up the stairs to the platform and put his hand on
Nick's shoulder.  "Come with me," he said as he guided Nick.

    "The pictures," Nick said sadly as he followed Kevin.

    "Will get done eventually," Kevin said.  He threw another look at Brian
and Justin. He sighed as he watched the two.  `Well they're getting along
well' Kevin said to himself as he walked Nick back into the dressing room.
As soon as they were inside, Nick threw himself down on the couch and began
to sob lightly.

    "Nick calm down," Kevin said as he sat on the edge of the couch and
slowly rubbed Nick's back.

    "I don't want to calm down Kevin," Nick yelled through his tears.

    "I don't really understand what's going on here.  If you want me to help,
why don't you explain this to me," Kevin suggested as he pulled Nick's hair
back a bit.

    Nick rolled over onto his back and sat up slowly.  "Kevin, you can't
understand.  Brian has been getting so distant with me lately.  He barely
even goes to hug me anymore.  I try so hard to make him happy, but no matter
what, he seems totally uninterested.  And now today, he's practically all
over Justin.  If he puts his arm around him one more time I swear I'll go
crazy.  Kevin why is he doing this?  I love him so much and he told me he
loves me.  Why is he trying to hurt me like this?"

    "He's not trying to hurt you Nick.  Look, I'm not going to pretend to
understand everything about you and Brian's relationship, but I do know that
something wasn't right.  Did you ever think that maybe you make better
friends than lovers?"

    "No," Nick yelled suddenly, hurling himself back down to the couch, his
body racked with sobs.  "You can't understand," he said over and over again.

    "I'm trying Nick, I really am trying.  Brian is probably just trying to
be friendly to Justin.  Make a new friend.  After all, you were up getting
your pictures taken.  He couldn't exactly be standing by your side."  Nick
perked up a bit.

    "Maybe," he said doubtfully.

    "No, not maybe.  Nick, I'm sure Brian loves you as much as you love him.
You're probably just going through a rough patch.  Things will get better, I
swear."

    Nick remained doubtful, but soon wiped his eyes off and sniffled one last
time. "You promise?"

    Kevin smiled down at Nick and gently rubbed his shoulder.  "I promise."

                    *****

    "I hate photo shoots," Chris complained as he rubbed his head.

    "That's because your hair looks like shit," Joey said with a laugh.
Chris punched him lightly on the arm and sighed.

    "So it was kind of funny how we were both their the same day," AJ said as
he walked through the parking lot with JC.

    "Yea I know.  We were supposed to go tomorrow, but since the weather was
bad, they told us to come by today," Lance said as he strolled over.

    "Well, it was definitely a lot of fun," Justin said, throwing looks in
either direction.  He spotted Brian walking a bit behind with Nick.  He
sighed lightly, but kept walking.

    "Well, how about we all do something tonight," Kevin suggested.

    "That sounds like a great idea," JC said.  "There are some great bars
around."

    "Hey wait a second," Justin said as he recalled the drinking age.

    "Oh that's right," Joey said with a frown.  "We can go to...umm..."

    "You can go to the bar," Justin said with a frown.  "I didn't feel like
going out anyway.  Besides, I don't wanna be the only one among ya'll who has
to drink soda."

    "Are you sure," JC asked.

    "Yea Just, we can go somewhere else," Lance replied.

    "No, I'm sure.  You guys go and have fun.  I'll get some room service and
watch the Disney channel," Justin said with a laugh.

    "Where are you guys staying," Kevin asked as he looked back and saw Nick
and Brian deep in conversation.

    "Toronto Springs," Chris replied.

    "You are not," Howie said as he stared at them.

    "We are too," Joey replied sarcastically.  "Why, where are you staying?"

    "Toronto Springs," AJ replied.  "How were we in the same hotel and not
know it?"

    "I guess one group of screaming fans looks like another," JC said.

    "Cool, so why don't we head over there and then get going," Kevin
suggested.

    "I think I'm gonna stay home tonight cuz," Brian said as he glanced over
at Justin.

    "You are," Nick said, a bit shocked.

    "Yea, I'm a little tired," he replied.

    Nick looked down at the ground and then up at Kevin.  "I guess I'm gonna
stay home too then," Nick replied.

    "No you're not," Brian said quickly.  Nick looked up at him
questioningly. "You're finally someplace where you're old enough to
party...legally that is.  You should go out and have fun."

    "But I wanted to spend..."

    "Nick, go.  Please," Brian said.

    "Yea come on Nick.  You gotta come," AJ whined as he hopped over to where
they were.

    "Um, ok I guess," Nick said.  He looked over at Brian and looked at him,
pleading in his eyes.  "So, I'll see you when I get back, right?"

    "Where else would I be," Brian replied with a giggle.

    'I don't know,' Nick thought to himself as he headed towards the limo.
'I just don't know.'

    'Hey, you're staying home too,' Justin asked Brian as he heard what was
going on.

    'Yea,' Brian replied.  'Guess taking those pictures and making myself
look perdy took a lot out of me.'

    'Oh,' Justin said.  'You wouldn't want to hang out then would you?'

    'Yea, I think I can spare some time for you,' Brian said with a laugh.
"We are in the same hotel and all.  I'm in 725.  Just come on up whenever you
want.'

    'Cool,' Justin said with a big smile.

    Nick watched the scene from a few paces back.  `Stay calm, they're just
hanging out,' he said to himself.  `Brian loves you.  He wouldn't hurt you.'

    Kevin glanced over at Nick and frowned.  'We're gonna keep you very
occupied tonight Nick,' Kevin said with a laugh.  He got closer and whispered
into his ear.  'Brian's just tired.  You know how he gets sometimes.  He just
needs a night off.'

    'Then why is he hanging out with Justin,' Nick asked sadly.

    'They'll hang out for a little while, Brian will get tired, Justin will
leave and by then we'll be home.  You'll go back to your room and see Brian
sleeping there like an angel waiting for you.  Everything will be fine,
alright?'  Kevin looked Nick right in the eye, trying to break through his
armor.

    'Alright,' Nick said, feeling a little better after Kevin's words. He
glanced over at Brian and saw him laughing with Justin.  `Why do I feel so...'

                            *****

    "Nick, you know Kevin is going to be waiting for you.  You're not getting
out of going out tonight."  Brian sat on his bed wearing his boxers and a
tight fitting black t-shirt.  The tv was quietly playing one of their songs
as Nick stared at his reflection in the mirror.  His skin was clear and
almost shone in the artificial light of the room.  His hair, now spiky gave
him a more daring look than his old, longer hair had.  It also seemed to fit
his face better.  He was wearing a tight fitting gray t-shirt along with a
pair of black pants, tight on top and growing progressively looser as they
approached his ankles.  His black Kenneth Cole shoes had just been polished
and reflected the light from the lamp perfectly.

    "Do I look alright," he asked nervously as he looked at Brian through the
mirror.

    "Nick, you always look great," Brian said.  He didn't look up from the
magazine he was wearing.

    "I really don't think blue is my color though," Nick said sadly.

    "No, really, it looks great on you," Brian replied.

    Nick sighed loudly and turned around, facing Brian directly.  "Would you
care to take your eyes off the magazine for a minute?  Not to inconvenience
you, but you think you could be nice to me for just a minute?"

    "Nick, what are you talking about," Brian said as he looked up.  He
noticed what Nick was wearing and put his head back down.  "I'm sorry."

    "Whatever," Nick replied sadly as he walked back into the bathroom.  He
picked up a bottle of cologne, a present from Brian a while ago, and splashed
some on his face.  It burnt where he had just shaved, but he just closed his
eyes tight and waited.

    "Nick, I'm really sorry," Brian said as Nick walked out of the bathroom.
He was now kneeling on the bed with his knees under him.  The magazine was
placed on the nightstand.

    "It's alright," Nick struggled to get out.  "I shouldn't have snapped at
you like that."

    "No, you had every right to," Brian replied quickly.  "I should've been
paying more attention to you."

    "I don't need attention," Nick said as he turned again towards the
mirror.  "Just...something...I don't know.  Say something nice to me."

    "What," Brian asked, almost laughing.

    "Say something nice to me.  Anything," Nick pleaded, turning quickly
towards Brian.

    "You're the reason I wake up in the morning," Brian said after a moment.
Nick thought a moment and then smiled.

    "Alright, you're off the hook," Nick said with a smile.  He saw Brian
laugh back and inhaled deeply.  "Could you do me one favor though?"

    "Anything," Brian replied without hesitation.

    "Put some pants on before you go see Justin."  Brian looked down and
laughed sharply.

    "Yea, no need for him to meet lil' Brian," Brian said with a grin.

    "Was that a hint for me to tell you how big you are," Nick laughed.

    "No..." Brian said with a grin.

    "Good thing," Nick laughed.  He walked over to Brian and kissed him
lightly on the cheek as he let his hand gently brush against Brian's crotch.

    "Hi there," Brian said as he pressed his lips back to Nick.  Nick kneeled
down on the bed as Brian began to lay back.  "You can be a little late."

    There was a knock on the door.

    "And we can ignore that," Nick said with a smile.

    "Wait, that might be Justin," Brian said as he pulled back and stood up
off the bed, leaving Nick kneeling where he had once been.

    "Yea, might be Justin," Nick said disappointingly.  "And I guess I have
to get going."

    "Have fun," Brian said as he pulled on a pair of sweatpants.  He ran over
to Nick and gave him a kiss on the cheek before walking over to the door and
opening it quickly.

    "Oh," he said when he saw who was behind it.

    "Your enthusiasm overwhelms me," Kevin said as he walked through the
door.  "Are you almost ready Nick?"

    "Looks like," Nick said as he threw a glance at Brian.  "Um...have fun,"
he added as he and Kevin headed towards the door.

    "You too," Brian said with a smile.  "Kevin, don't let him get too
drunk," he laughed.

    "Oh, I won't," Kevin laughed.  "You can drink soda Nick."

    "I might need something a little stronger," Nick said as he walked out
the door.

    Brian sat back down on the bed and sighed.  He lifted his head up and
looked down at what he was wearing.  Jogging pants and a t-shirt didn't seem
too attractive to him.  With a groan he was back on his feet and leaning over
his suitcase.  "These are Nick's clothes," he said with a groan.  He pulled
his sweatpants off quickly and walked over to wear Nick's suitcase lay.

    "Did I come at a bad time," a voice behind him said.

    Brian spun around quickly to face the figure in the doorway.  Justin
stood there wearing a pale blue tank top and a pair of black sweat pants.
His hair was somewhat matted down and his usual gold chain hung loosely
around his neck.

    "No, you didn't come at a bad time," Brian said with a smile.  "I'm
sorry, come on in."  Justin laughed slightly and walked into the room.  He
stood in the center of the room a moment, not knowing where to sit.  "I'm
sorry the room is such a mess," Brian said, his face turning red.  "I was
just looking for some pants."

    "It's alright," Justin laughed as he slowly got down to indian style,
sitting on the floor.

    "Oh, I'm sorry," Brian said, getting even redder.  "Why don't you sit on
the bed.  It has to be more comfortable than the floor."

    "Oh, thanks," Justin said with a smile.  He got up slowly as sat on the
bed, pulling both his legs under him and watching as Brian ran around trying
to straighten the room up a bit.  "You don't have to clean for me," Justin
said as he grinned.

    "Yes, I do," Brian laughed.  "My mom would never let me have friends over
unless the house was clean."

    "This is a hotel room."

    "Good point," Brian said as he dropped the clothes he had been carrying.
He jumped over Justin and landed on the bed next to him.  "So, how are you
doing Curly?"

    "Pretty good," Justin said as he looked over at Brian laying next to him.
 "A little tired after the photo shoot."

    "Smiling can be hard work," Brian said with a grin.  "See."

    "Shut up," Justin laughed, smacking his shoulder.  "It is hard."

    "At least you had me to keep you entertained," Brian said.

    "Well, yes that was wonderful," Justin replied.  "So, what are we gonna
do tonight while everyone else gets drunk and dirty."

    "We can get drunk and dirty here," Brian said with a smile.

    "Hey, I'm still a minor," Justin grinned.

    "It's alright.  I won't corrupt you."

    "Yea, but I might corrupt you," Justin replied.

                                        *****

    "Nick, so help me God, if you don't start smiling I'm gonna smack the
frown off your face," JC said with a smirk.  "Come on, get happy."

    "Sorry JC," Nick replied as he sat at the table near the bar.  He glanced
out on the dance floor as Kevin and AJ flirted with a couple of girls.  The
rest of the guys were nowhere in site, except for Joey, who sat at the bar
with his arm around a tall, long-legged blond.

    "Why don't you go find some pretty girl to dance with," JC asked.

    Nick gave him an odd look and shook his head with a smile.  "Um, maybe
not."

    "OK, why don't you go find some nice boy to dance with then," JC asked
with a grin.  Nick looked up quickly and stared him in the eyes.

    "Excuse me?"

    "It's alright Nick," JC replied.  "You're gay aren't you?"

    "What makes you think that," Nick asked, still a bit shocked.

    "I've got really good gaydar, so to speak," JC laughed.  "Most gay guys
do."

    "Wait a second..."

    "Yes Nick, I'm gay," JC said with a laugh.

    "Holy shit," Nick said.  He looked over at JC's drink and downed it
quickly.

    "You are allowed to get your own here," JC said as he regarded his now
empty glass.

    "Yea, but your's was closer."  Nick stared down at the table, JC's words
running through his head.  "So, yea, I'm gay too."

    "Was that so hard," JC asked as he tried to look at Nick's face.

    "No, not really.  I mean, I've said it before, but...I dunno.  Oh who
knows?"  Nick began to laugh loudly.

    "Good, now Kevin won't beat the shit out of you for sitting here and
sulking all night," JC said as he laughed with him.

    "I guess."  Nick's laughter quickly ended, however as his thoughts went
back to what he had been thinking about.

    "But I guess something is really wrong," JC said, leaning closer to Nick.
 "Wanna talk about it?"

    "I don't know..."

    "Oh come on.  It can't be that bad," JC said.  "Just give me the quick
rundown and we'll see what we can do."

    Nick turned his head to face JC's smiling face.  "Well...I'm in this
relationship.  And everything was really great at first, but now he doesn't
seem to like me all that much.  Like, he's affectionate every once in a
while.  Rarely goes to kiss me anymore, hardly looks at me.  And now he's
starting to pay all this attention to this other guy..."

    "So you're worried about Brian and Justin hooking up or something," JC
said nonchalantly.

    "Yea basically," Nick replied slowly, a bit surprised JC knew about their
relationship.  "How did you..."

    "I've seen you guys together.  Doesn't take a rocket scientist," JC said
with a smile.

    "I know it sounds dumb-"

    "It doesn't."

    "But, I mean, I don't even know for sure if Justin is gay.  All I know
is, Brian is treating him the way he used to treat me."

    "Yea, it can be hard.  You guys are just in a rut though.  I'm sure of
it."

    "But what if we're not..."

    "Then it's better for you to find out now while it's not too late."

    "JC, can I ask you a wierd question?  Well, it's not really wierd...I
just need to know."

    "Ask me anything," JC said.  "But I think I know what you're gonna ask
and I don't think if you want to know the answer."

    "Is Justin gay?"

    JC looked down at his empty glass, suddenly wishing there was something
in it that he could down quickly.  He sighed as he continued to stare at it.
"Yea Nick.  Justin's gay."

                                    *****

    "I can't believe you talked me into watching that," Justin said.

    "It's not that bad," Brian laughed.

    "I still sleep with a Winnie the Pooh doll.  Didn't you think that would
scare me?"

    "Wait, you STILL sleep with one?  I thought you said that was taken out
of context?"

    "Shit," Justin said with a laugh as he hid his head back under the pillow.

    "Busted," Brian laughed.  He hit Justin lightly on the back as Justin
laughed lightly.  With a grin Brian reached into the drawer by the nightstand
and pulled out a small object.  "Hey, ostrich boy, peak your head out for a
second."

    Justin laughed and removed the pillow from his head.  "Wait a second...is
that...?"

    "Yea, this is Mr. Night Light.  No, I don't still use one and I haven't
for years.  I just kind of take him around with me when we have shows and
tours and stuff."

    "Oh that's cool."

    "Yea, I got really homesick when we started traveling a lot, so I took
this with me and it made me feel a little better.  Not as cuddly as a winnie
the pooh...but I make do with it."

    "Aw, thats so sweet," Justin said with a grin.

    "OK, enough sweetness," Brian laughed as he put the nightlight back on
the drawer.  "How about another monster movie?"

    "Are you insane?"

    "Oh come on," Brian laughed.  "I have one called 'The Boogie Man Gets
Justin."

    "Shut up," Justin laughed, hitting Brian's arm.  "Besides, the Boogie Man
isn't real.  Psychopaths like we saw in that last movie are."

    "I can't believe you've never seen psycho.  Are you a communist?"

    "Ok, you know what time it is?  It's time to stop making fun of Justin."

    "Whatever," Brian replied.  "Hey, do you mind if I take a really quick
shower?"

    "Oh, I'm sorry.  We can call it a night if you want," Justin said, ready
to stand.

    "No, I don't mean for you to go.  "I just want to take one before I'm too
tired to do it later.  It'll only take me a minute.

    "Oh, sure go ahead," Justin said.  He watched as Brian walked towards the
bathroom, a smile on his face.  As soon as the door was closed Justin flopped
onto his back and giggled lightly.  'Damn he's hot,' he thought to himself
with a laugh.  He stood up quickly and walked around the room a bit, noticing
Nick's clothes intermingled with Brian's.  'I wonder if he and Nick are...?'
Justin thought for a moment.  'Shit, I don't even know if Brian's gay.'  He
couldn't deny his growing attraction for Brian, but the thought of him not
being gay worried him.  And even if he was, he and Nick were usually
together.  What if they were together?

    "This is too much to think about," Justin thought.  He walked back over
to the bed and lie down.  'I'll just wait for Brian to finish up and then
we'll see what happens.'  He rested his head on the pillow Brian had been
using and shut his eyes.  Within moments, he was fast asleep.

    "Alright, I'm out," Brian said as he stepped out of the bathroom.  His
shirt was flung over his shoulder and his hair was a bit messy and wet.  He
looked over at the bed and saw Justin sleeping on his pillow.  "He's on my
side of the bed," Brian thought to himself with a laugh.  He dried his hair
off quickly with his shirt and walked around the bed to the other side.  He
debated for a moment if he should bother to wake him.  He decided against it
and lay down in the bed next to Justin.  He placed a blanket over him and
tucked him in a bit, laughing as he did so.  That done, he got under the
blankets as well and turned off the light.  He faced Justin and smiled
lightly.  "Goodnight."

                                        *****

    "Can you get into your room alright, Nicky," AJ asked with a laugh.

    "I'm not that drunk AJ," Nick replied.  "I'm just happy."

    "Thank God," Kevin replied.  "I was going to hit you back at that bar."

    "Kevin, stop being my daddy," Nick whined.  He laughed loudly and looked
back.  "No pun intended."

    "Shut up and go to bed," Kevin laughed.

    "I'm goin, I'm goin," Nick laughed.  He looked down the hall, almost
waiting for the guys from N'Sync to get off at their floor.  But they were
staying one floor above them.  With a sigh Nick walked to his room and put
his card in the door.

    "He must already be asleep," Nick thought to himself as he entered.  He
dropped his coat on the floor as he walked in and headed towards the
bathroom.  He turned the light on and then stuck his head out, now able to
see the bed better.

    "What the-"

    He walked out of the bathroom and approached the bed slowly.  Glancing
down He noticed Brian sleeping, but on the side he usually slept on.  On
Brian's side was Justin, sleeping soundly, one arm flung over Brian's chest.

    "This isn't happening," Nick said quietly.  "This is not happening."

    He walked slowly out of the room, leaving the bathroom light on as he
passed it.  Blindly, he walked down the hallway, towards the elevator.  First
he pressed the down button, but shook his head immediately, pressing the up
one instead.  He felt the piece of paper in his pocket, pulling out the sheet
that JC had written on earlier in the evening.  891.  Nick entered the
elevator and pressed the button for the eighth floor.  He leaned against the
wall, feeling a wave of nausea overcome him as the elevator jerked up a
floor.  The doors opened slowly as he stepped out and headed down the hall.

    JC was outside his room, about to open the door with his card, a soda in
hand.  He turned when he heard the elevator open.  He looked a bit surprised
as Nick stepped out of the doors and began to walk towards him.

    "Um, did you get off on the wrong floor, Nicky?  I know you're a bit
tipsy," JC laughed.  He looked at Nick's face as the smile left his own.  "Do
you want me to help you back down?"

    "Can I sleep with you tonight," Nick asked quickly.

    "Excuse me," JC choked out.  'He's not THAT drunk.'

    "My bed's sort of occupied," Nick said sadly, not looking at JC's face.

    "Oh man Nicky, I'm sorry," JC said as he wrapped one arm around Nick's
shoulder.  Nick buried his face into JC's shoulder and shook lightly.  "Come
on Nicky.  You're sleeping with me tonight."

    He led Nick into the room, closing the door behind them.

                    *****

    So there you have it.  I hope everyone found it enjoyable.  It was fun to
write.  If you've got any comments or anything, email me at BrwyMilo@aol.com.