Date: Fri, 18 Aug 2000 10:44:09 -0700 From: Denzil Cuddy <D_Cuddy@email.msn.com> Subject: Story of my Love part eight Hey people, well here is part eight!! Sorry it has been so very long since I have posted anything but I have been rather occupied. LOL I have classes starting back on Monday, and I got a promotion at work! Yee haw. LOL Well, enjoy part eight and as always let me know what you think. As usual if you should not be reading this, don't! If you read it when you shouldn't be don't get caught, and don't blame me or the archive. hehe. Have fun. I suggest everyone read Lance in Shining Armor, Brian and Me, My Surprise Romance, Nick and Justin, all great stories, by great authors. Thanks for reading. The sun light is filtering through the curtains, filling the room with a curious half light. There are spots of light dancing on the wall opposite me as the wind blows gently through the open window. The sense of stillness and quiet that pervades the room is almost sacrosanct in its perfection. I smile as I stretch, and fell the tired ache in my body, as joints pop. I roll onto my back and stare up at the blank white ceiling for a moment. I can not help but think of the time I have lost in the hospital, and how much my life will change because of it. I can not help but think of the poor girl who shot me and killed herself. I have no animosity for her, I can only feel pity and helplessness in the face of such a horrifyingly awesome event. I pull back the cover and look down at my slightly too thin frame. I smile as I think of Lance feeding me strawberries and chocolate. I smile as I think of Lance and his warm gentle smile, and the sense of strength and solidarity that seems to emanate from him. I shudder as I wonder if I would have been able to get through this whole fiasco without him. I sit up on the edge of the bed and take a deep breath as my head spins and the world seems to blur for a moment. I push myself up and stand on my own two feet for a moment. I reach over to the wall and brace myself up as I walk slowly toward the window. I only have on my boxer brief but it is a pleasant late summer day. I finally reach the window and look out at the view of this awesome city which I will shortly leave behind. The sunlight is brilliant and causes my eyes to ache for a moment as the adjust to the unaccustomed brightness. I smile at the sight of the golden fire reflecting off the powerful buildings that surround me. I smile as I feel the gentle breeze caress my skin, and I smile even more when I see Lance standing on the balcony staring out at the same beauty. I slip out the door and walk unsteadily over to his side. I clutch the railing and put my arm around his shoulders. He jumps slightly, and looks over at me. His smile is as brilliant as the day. The power of love that the smile conveys makes the brilliant light of the sun seem dim, and causes the mild warmth of the day to become an overbearing inferno. I smile back and see the love and lust dance in those wonderful green eyes of his. I feel as if my spirit has been reinforced with the power of this love, with the strength of this man I love. "Good morning! I was wondering where you had wondered off to." I say gently as I stare into his eyes. They are as deep as the ocean, as timeless and powerful as a dream. I feel lost and found at the same moment when I look into them. "I woke up a few minutes ago and thought I would get a little fresh air." He chuckles a bit. "As if there can be fresh air in this city. God, I can not wait to get back home. It will be good for both of us." He puts his arm around my shoulders and we stare out at the city wrapped in each others arms. I think time is standing still as we stand there. It is a moment that can not be interrupted by the outside world or any of its concerns. It is a moment that stretches on forever in the heart and mind. It is a moment of pure contentment and happiness, of pure love. It is, however, just a moment and like all moments must come to an end. Lance pulls away and takes my hand as we walk back into the room. "I'm going to call and order room service, is there anything you want this morning?" He asks as he walks over to the small white phone that sits beside the bed. I love when he lets his southern accent show. It is so sexy and wonderful. "Yeah, I want some blueberry pancakes, milk, strawberries, and some toast with jelly." I say as I fall on the bed an laugh at the simple act of living. Lance gives me a small smile and quickly places the order. He then walks over to the bed and falls down beside me. I slap the pillow across his face before he can say anything, and go into hysterics at the look of consternation on his face. "I love you." I say as I throw my arms around him and pull him into a hug. I feel his lips touch mine and the old electricity is still there. Again the moment stretches out, this moment of perfection. There are many of them in any given day, you just have to be in a mind to look for them and appreciate them. I swear I will always look for them now, and never become jaded again. The knock on a the door seems loud and intrusive but is actually just a normal polite knock. I smile as I roll away from Lance and watch him stand and hurry over to the door. "Hey, Lance, how is everything this morning?" Justin says as he breezes into the room pushing our room service cart in front of him. I see the slight frown on Lance's face but know that he will get over it. "Hey Justin, so did you find that nurse last night?" I ask as I start to stand the world spins again and this time I fall onto the bed. "Um....Lance can you grab me a shirt out of the closet? I think my little walk this morning has gotten the better of me." "Sure," Lance walks over to the closet and quickly grabs a tight blue wife beater. Well as I slip it on it hangs loosely on me. I guess I really do need to gain some weight. "Wow, JC, we are going to have to get you eating." Lance helps me up and we walk over to the little table where Justin has put out the food on plates, and poured our milk. I smile at his thoughtfulness. Justin is only eating cereal though. "Justin, is that all you're eating??" I ask. "Yeah, not all of us need to gain weight." Justin and Lance kind of chuckle at this and I can not help but smile. I look down at my plate and Lance adds a couple of pieces of bacon to the already large pile of food. I sigh as I bring the first fork full to my mouth. The three of us sit and chat for a few moments as we devour the food before us. I finish a good half of the pile that Lance and I prepared for myself. He smiles happily as I push the plate away from me. I lean over and give him a little kiss on the cheek. "Well, if you two will excuse me I need to shower and get ready for the day." I say as I push the chair back. I stand and almost fall on my face. I am blushing and shaking a little and my legs seem to be made of water. I feel like screaming, but Lance and Justin are immediately by my side, and I know that I should not feel frustrated. I am doing remarkably well considering I have not used my legs in two months. "Are you o.k. J.C.?" Lance asks in a half whisper as he rubs his hand up and down my back. "I'm fine, just have to get used to walking and standing again. Sorry guys didn't mean to bother you." I manage to stammer out. Which, apparently, is not the right thing to have said. "You are never a bother J.C.!!" Justin says as he and Lance help me to my uncertain feet. "Yeah, J.C., you are never a bother. We love you and we are here to help you. If you will accept our help, and the fact you need help, you will get well a lot faster." Lance adds as he helps me back into the chair by the table. I smile a little wickedly as an idea takes form in my mind. I look over at my Lance and the smile broadens. He looks a little startled at the predatory nature of my smile, I can see it in his eyes. "O.k. fine, I accept the fact that I am going to need you two to help me, and the fact I need help." I say as both Justin and Lance nod and sit in their seats beside me. "Lance, can you help me in the shower? I wouldn't ask, but I would hate to fall in the shower." I smile again as a bit of a blush creeps onto his face. He is so pale it is easy to tell when he is blushing. I love it. "Fine, I can tell when and where I am not wanted." Justin chimes in by my side. "I am just going to go to my room and call Britney and see if she is still on schedule for meeting us in Orlando on Monday." Justin stands and stretches dramatically. He has a melodramatic pout on his face and I can tell he really wants to smile. "O.k. if you don't want to watch me shower, you can go then. Tell Britney I said hey." Justin chuckles as he walks out of the room. I turn to Lance and his lips meet mine. His arms are around me and he helps me stand, being my support and strength. I close my eyes and lose myself in the sensation of the kiss. In the sweet taste of his breath, and the smooth feel of his lips. I let my fingers twine into his hair, and admire the silky softness there. I like the feel of him, the strength in him. He is solid beneath his thin shirt, and I think he has been going to the gym while I have been trapped in my hospital bed. I let my other hand squeeze his ass, and I feel his startled jump. He pulls away and I open my eyes to find myself staring into his. "Well, you are feeling frisky this morning." I smile as he says this. "Fine, let's get this shower over with, it is too early for you to be all sexy and everything." I put my arm around his shoulders and we walk into the bathroom together. I smile wickedly as the door shuts behind us and he starts the water running. This is going to be fun. Lance and I walk out of the bathroom together in a cloud of steam. It was a long hot interesting shower, and I think Lance was pleasantly surprised by the amount of strength I did possess. I flop down onto the bed, completely exhausted, as Lance rummages through the closet looking for a change of clothes for both him and me. He finally throws a pair of pants and a lovely blue shirt on the bed beside me. He then goes to the dresser and throws a clean pair of boxer briefs tome. I chuckle as he pull on his own pair and begins to put his clothes on. "Well, are you going to get dressed or are you going to lie there naked all day and watch me?" He asks as he pulls on his nylon cargo pants and knit t-shirt. I smile at him, and chuckle a little bit. "I was enjoying watching you, but if you insist I guess I can get dressed." I melodramatically sigh, and begin to pull on my underwear. I notice Lance has raised his eyebrow questioningly. I look over at him and smile as I stand, fairly steadily, and pull on my dockers, and finally my thin blue shirt. "Well, I did like you better naked, but we have to go out. We're going to dinner, and a drive around the city." He smiles as he walks over to me and kisses me. I feel like dancing, but know I am definitely not ready for that just yet. Instead I melt in his arms and am completely shocked when he pushes me down on the bed. I smile up at him and he just laughs as he shakes his head. He then holds up the socks and proceeds to put them on for me. He then puts on my shoes, and laces them up for me. I fall in love all over again. "Come on" he says as he reaches out his hand to help me up. I take it gratefully and willingly lean on his strength. We make our way to the door, and down the hall to Justin's room. Lance knocks quickly and we wait for just a moment before it quickly opens. I gasp as I see who is standing there. I am immediately pulled into a hug, and perfect perfume fills my mind. "Britney!! I thought you were going to be meeting us in Orlando!" I am crying a little bit, but we have known each other for so long it is wonderful to see her. "What? You didn't honestly expect me to wait around another two days to see you walking around again did you!? Honestly, I came to visit you in the hospital, and I just had to make sure you were all right when Justin called to tell me the news." She looks me up and down appraisingly. "You are a little thin, but I guess that is to be expected. Between myself and Lance I am sure we can have you back to your old self in no time." She laughs as she pulls me into another hug. "See I told you I was going to help you gain some weight." Lance chuckles as he adds himself to our hug. "Group Hug!!" I hear Justin yell as I fell him join in too. I laugh, and it feels wonderful. "O.k., o.k. so I am a bit thin, I just ask that you don't fatten me up. That is all I need, just get me back to normal." I laugh as the all finally end the hug and look at one another. I love all the southern-ness. "O.k. so we have reservations in half an hour we had better get moving." Britney says as she looks down at her watch. Lance immediately agrees and we all head down the hall with me leaning heavily on Lance. We all chat and catch up on the elevator and in the limo. We finally reach a little out of the way, but obviously exclusive, restaurant and are escorted to our table in the back. It is a little private booth, and I am happy for the seclusion. I sigh a little to loudly as we all sit and catch concerned looks all around. "I'm fine." I say to the little group. "Just a little too happy to be sitting down again." They all nod an smile their understanding. "So, J.C., do you remember anything from you coma?" Britney asks. "I mean they are always saying people remember hearing things and stuff, do you?" The waitress comes by and Lance orders a good wine for us all, and we place our orders for dinner. "No, I don't remember anything anyone said or did around me. I do remember this dream of falling and falling. It was terrifying, because I could not scream, and I kept seeing those I love and know as I feel past them. Finally there was a light and I feel into it, and then I woke up." I chuckle as I tell my little tale. We all chat and eat and drink good wine for quite a while. Finally Justin and Britney head back to the hotel, and Lance and I go for the carriage ride around the park. It is beautiful evening and it feels wonderful to be out. The dark secluded trees of Central Park allow you to lose yourself in the illusion of the country side. It is easy to forget that one of the largest cities in the world is all around you. I feel a sense of sadness come over me as a gentle wind blows and carries the noise and smell of the city back to me. I want to be out in the country. I want to be back home in Florida. Orlando isn't exactly a tiny city, but it is nothing near New York, or any of the larger cities actually. I want to be at Lance's house, watching television and eating popcorn. I pull Lance a little closer to me, we can not sit really close while out in public. I want to cry on his shoulder though. "What's the matter J.C.?" He asks as he sees the hurt look on my face. "I want to go home. Not in two days, but right now. Can we go back to the hotel and try to get an earlier flight?" I think he is about to protest but he sees the longing on my face and gives in. He asks the driver to take us back, and I sigh contentedly as I wipe the tears from my eyes. I look up at the few stars you can see in this city as we head back. They are all blurry from my unshed tears, and my longing heart. I am suddenly so tired and want to just curl up and sleep. I must have dozed off as the next thing I know Lance is shaking me, and we are back at the hotel. We are in a cab, but I do not remember getting off the carriage. "Sorry, I must have fallen asleep." I say as I stagger out of the cab and into his arms. He catches me easily and helps me as we walk into the hotel. I practically sleep on his shoulder. We finally reach the room and he helps me into bed. I feel safe and warm as he climbs in beside me and I am immediately gone. The sweet darkness of sleep enfolds me and I accept it's embrace willingly. She is standing in front of me. Her long brown hair blowing wildly in the hot dry wind that seems to blowing from nowhere and everywhere at the same instant. Her hand is shaking as she points the gun at me. I scream as I see what she is about to do. No sound comes out of my throat though. I try to scram again, all to no avail. She smiles as she aims the gun, and I see a horrible glint in her eyes. She is talking to me but the wind is carrying her voice away. I watch her lips move, but can not piece out what she is saying to me. The gun fires and I see the bullet coming at me. I can not move to avoid it but it approaches so very slowly. It hits me and slowly pushes into my skin with a horrible force. I feel the muscles rip and the bone shatter. I feel myself being thrown backward and on the cold floor. I am screaming trying to tell her not to kill herself. I know that is what she is doing, and I want to stop her. I can not move or stand though, and the cold marble floor seems to be drinking my blood. I hear a second gun shot and I scream all the louder. I scream up at the heavens which are suddenly above me in a magnificent display of stars. I scream and the wind picks up my voice and carries it away from me. I scream until I feel my heart will burst. That is when I hear my name being spoken in a deep southern voice by the wind. That is when I feel warm strong hands on my shoulders, pulling me back to the real world, back to myself. I open my eyes and look up into the eyes of my love. "J.C. wake up it is all a bad dream. Come on, come back to me." He is looking down into my eyes and I feel safe. "I'm awake. I'm sorry, was I screaming?" I ask as he wipes the tears from my face and pulls me to him. I sob into his shoulder and can not stop crying. I pull him to me and can not get close enough. I want to share everything with him, for our souls to merge. For this feeble fragile skin to part so that we can become piece and part of one another. I want to be able to share his strength. I can not stop crying. "Shhh.....it's o.k." He says as he strokes my hair and lets me hang on to him. I slowly calm down and lie back down on the soft bed. I look up at him and my heart still hurts, I still long for home. "Lance, I want to go home. I want to be away from this place and the ghosts that taunt me here. I want to be home, and safe. Your home, our home, I want to be there. Please!" I wipe the tears from my eyes. I realize how childish I sound, but I can not help it. My emotions are all out of control, I feel powerless and I want to be somewhere familiar. "Our new flight leaves in three hours, I have you bags packed, and a cab will be waiting to take us to the airport. We are going home, to our home. Where I can hold you and love you, and we can all be together again." Lance pulls me into a hug and I feel happy. Well there it is part eight, nothing really interesting I know, but I hope you all like it. Let me know. Please send e-mail. I really need/want some feedback. Thanks. D.C.