Date: Thu, 9 Jun 2005 13:55:57 -0700 (PDT)
From: Ronnie Gilmore <rfgboy85@yahoo.com>
Subject: True Love With Justin Timberlake 15-16

Sorry, Chapter 15 was a misprint and was supposed to
be chapter 14 so ignore chapter 13-15 and let this one
be Chapter 15... anyways...

This is just a story - This in no means implies that
Justin Timberlake is gay. If he is, thats his
business, but once again - it is just a story.


CHAPTER 15


     "What?!" I found myself yelling. "What the hell
do you mean it was a setup?"

     Justin stood up and motioned with his hands for
me to calm down. "Just listen to me before you get
mad, please."

     I shook my head and leaned back in my chair. "So
what, you didn't like me?! You got tired of me?! Was
that the plan? To get rid of me, so you stage a phony
phone call... that would explain why I haven't heard
from you in almost five years."

     "No no, you got it all wrong," Justin was saying.
"I didn't know about the phone call until after you
left. Honest."

     I sat there for a moment. "Then wait, I am
confused."

     "When Joey made that phone call -"

     "Hold up, Joey was the one who made the call? He
was in it on it to?"

     "Would you just please shut up and listen Rj!"
Justin finally managed to say. It took me by surprise,
and angered me a bit, but I bit my tounge anyways.

     "Okay," He finally said. He sat back down in his
chair and faced me. "I didn't know about the phone
call until after you left. When you left that is when
Joey told me he had made the phone call. Naturally, I
got upset just as you are now, but then he explained
why he did it. See, Joey said that there was a guy
from the papparrazzi that was on to you and I. The guy
saw us together that night when we went to that
resaurant. He managed to get a few pics... He was
going to rat my sexuality out all over the magazines.
But, the pictures he took didn't prove anything and
couldn't use them. So he started to follow us."

     "So how did Joey catch on to this guy then?" I
asked suddenly curious.

     "This guy had the nerve to start questioning Joey
about it," Justin explained. "It was at the hotel and
Joey was down in the lobby waiting for Lance because
they were going to go and have breakfast. Well this
guy walked right up to Joey and was asking him things
like how close him and I were, and then dramatically
started asking about you. Like where you came from,
and were you a family member of mine and what not.
Somehow Joey caught on to this guy. It might have been
the camera hanging around the guys neck that gave it a
clue. So Joey managed to get a name out of this man.
Obviously he wasn't the smartest paparazzi, and Joey
made some calls. He pretended to be with some other
magazine. Thats how Joey caught on to this guy."

     "The phone call?"

     "Right," Justin said, forgetting, I suppose, what
point he was trying to make. "Joey contacted our
manager who happened to be Lou at the time, right
before we went through that whole court battle with
him... anyways, Lou and Joey talked about it for a
while and realised that if you and I were to be found
out it, could ruin the whole image we have. So Joey
made a rash decision and made the call... It was for
our safety."

     "Oh," I said. It had made a little bit more sense
now. But then another thought hit me. "Justin?"

     "Yeah?"

     "If that is the case, why didn't Joey just tell
us we might need to lay it low for a while? And on
that thought, why didn't you call me and let me know
about the call? In fact, why didn't you ever call me?
I waited for you. You won't believe how many nights I
went to sleep and bawled my eyes out... thats not easy
for a me to say out loud. But I really did. I cried my
eyes out every night over you."

     Justin sat there for a moment looking at me. Once
again his beautiful blue eyes pierced into mine. At
one time, they had been youthful, full of light; full
of hopes and dreams; they shined at some time and you
found yourself lost in an ocean blue.

     Now, they were older, more mature. The light had
gone out with the hopes and dreams and replaced with a
dim light with few hopes and dreams either fulfilled
or faded away along the shores of the ocean. They had
wisdom, knowledge; filled with insight. But that
didn't stop me from getting lost in them.

     The Justin I last saw was just a boy, like myself
and just a little older. He was learning who he was,
and enjoying life in every possible way. Longing to be
part of the world as he saw it, and be only the person
he wanted to be. The Justin now seemed completely
different. Of course he had grown up, but he was a man
now. He seemed to find who he was, though he didn't
show it much. He saw much of the world and probably
much more, and had his fair share of enjoyments and
like very person, strife. It was just hard to believe
I still loved him. I realised that as I looked at him.
Cameron was a lucky woman.

     "My manager told me it not be a good idea to call
you so soon after you and I were seperated," Justin
explained, breaking my thoughts once again. "Lou
suggested that we throw this paparazzi guy way off the
trail by me pretending to date girls and such.
Anything to keep this guy from publishing anything
about you and I. It wouldn't be just me being ruined,
it would have been the whole group, and you."

     "I understand that Justin," I told him getting
frustrated. "But you never called at all. Not once. I
had to sit there and watch you on TV, listen to you on
the radio, all of those things just in hope that you
would give me some hint that you were thinking of me
and that somehow we would see each other again."

     "I tried! I tried calling you. But they made sure
I was always busy. Doing photo shoots, promos,
concerts; don't think that I didn't think about you.
It tore me up inside every single waking hour that I
thought about you. I missed you so much. I would lay
down at night and cry and just think about you. Clutch
onto my pillow and just wish you were right there
beside me. But it just became impossible."

     I almost cried. For the first time in a long
time, I was getting to hear how Justin had felt. The
reason why he couldn't call, his thoughts of me, how
he had missed me. I found myself smiling. It had made
me happy. He did really care about me.

     "What about the girls you dated?" I asked.

     "Britney and I were forced to say we were dating.
Lou knew that would gain us some major attention and
thats what would show that paprazzi how wrong he was.
Plus, he said that I hadn't been dating anyone and
surely people would start questioning. So Britney and
I went along with it. After a while we couldn't take
it anymore. Plus she had fallen in love with Wade
Robinson, one of our choreographers."

     "Wow," I said. "I remember hearing about that. Of
course, they made it come out like she cheated on
you."

     "Lou's idea once again," Justin said. "But
Britney and I felt it was a little harsh and she
didn't want the wrong image. But of course they went
with it anyways. I had to console her while she cried
her eyes out. After a while Wade couldn't take it, and
he ended it with her. Once again, I was there to help
her get through it."

     "So how did Alyssa come into it?"

     "Alyssa Milano? Right. That was an accident. See,
one of the road crew, who had no idea about me knew
Alyssa. Alyssa claimed she liked me and all and the
guy kind of hooked us up through a blind date. Trust
me, I did not plan on that. I never made it official,
obviously and neither did she. But once again, the
press went crazy. We decided to be friends after
that."

     It all made sense to me now. Except...

     "Cameron? What about Cameron?"

     Justin didn't say anything.

     "Justin?"

     He turned back around and faced the gadget board
and began messing with them again. The music changed
and went to a heavier, more soulful upbeat song. This
song was catchy too. "I don't want to talk about it."

     That threw me back a bit. "Justin why not?"

     He looked at me. "Not right now, alright?"

     I shook my head, the anger rising up in me once
again. I stood up, grabbed my satchel and headed for
the door.

     "Where are you going?" Justin asked suddenly
jumping up and following me.

     "The least you could do is provide me with
answers Justin. I waited five years for them, in case
you didn't know," I said as I walked out the door.

     "Oh what the-" Justin said as he continued behind
me. "Would you stop? Oh my gosh, from the moment we
saw each other again you have acted like a child... "

     I stopped. "Excuse me?"

     I heard him sigh. "All you have done is be mopy,
and sad and pathetic. Not to be too harsh. True we
have not seen each other in a long time, and yes I
deserve to give you some explanation. I will admit
that. But I don't have to give them to you right away.
Respect my feelings as well RJ. I am trying to respect
yours. I am just not ready to go down that road yet in
talking about Cameron."

     I turned around and faced him. "You were able to
tell me about Brit and Alyssa."

     "Like I said Rj, respect my feelings. I have been
respecting yours. I would never force you to say or do
anything that you didn't want to do."

     My eyes shifted to the floor. Once again, Justin
had convinced me I was being foolish. "Alright then. I
will respect you. But... this isn't easy for me."

     "Tell me about it. I really didn't think I would
see you again to be honest." I heard him say. "Please
don't take that the wrong way."

     "I am not," I said. "I didn't think that I would
ever see you again either. I really didn't think that
I would be interviewing you and Cameron. I almost
didn't. But Lana told me that I shouldn't let fear
stand in the way of doing this. So - here I am."

     "Fear?" Justin asked. He took a step towards me.
"What do you have to be afraid of?"

     "Justin? Oh my- you! I was scared of you! I was
scared to see you. To talk to you. I didn't know if
you ever wanted to see me or anything like that. I
have been going out of my mind. I didn't know if you
had moved on and in the process began to hate me or
something. There is alot for me to be scared of."

     Justin laughed. "I would never hate you. I never
have. From the moment I saw you I knew that I liked
you. I liked you alot. I couldn't think of anything
else. You were like my... you were everything."

     I felt a warm tear run down my cheek. I had
started crying and didn't even realise it. "But I am
not your everything anymore, Justin. Cameron is...
right?"

     Before he could answer I walked out of the
studio. Out into the hot, California sun. The tears
were now pouring, and I found myself sobbing. Walking
to the curb, I wiped my eyes the best I could and
began to flag down a taxi. It didn't take long for me
to get one.

     I looked back at the studio in time for Justin to
walk out. He had a pained expression on his face as he
stood there at the door, not moving. I smiled a fake
smile and then hopped in the cab. I managed not to
look back as it pulled away from the studio. That made
me cry even more. Once again, I was having to walk
away from the one guy, I still found, I cared about
more than anything in the world.



**                       **     **
         **



     I had picked my car up from the golf course and I
began driving. Where, I had no clue. But I was getting
the hell out of Los Angeles.

     There was a big traffic jam, and after sitting in
it for a couple of hours, I was finally driving past
the city limit sign. I forced myself not to think of
the confrontation with Justin just a few hours before.
It was no use in thinking about him. I decided I would
turn on the radio.

     It happened to be on a country station and Dierks
Bentleys voice rang out of my car speakers. "Lot of
Leavin Left to Do." I smiled. This seemed like the
perfect song for that moment. I had been listening to
country alot lately. Mostly, I felt, it brung me a
little closer back home to Texas.

     I kept driving, enjoying the rugged and yet
smooth voice of Dierks. Smiling, I kept my eyes on the
road. Off to the right of me, the sun was just
beginning to set. Just continue driving.

     Dierks went off and Cyndi Thomson came on. "I'm
Gone." She was singing about how she had given her man
so many chances and she finally was leaving. I learned
as I was driving that I truly loved my country music.

      My cell phone rang. I looked at the caller ID.
It was Lana. I started to pick it up but then stopped
myself. I needed some time for myself. No
interruptions. Just take the little car as far as it
can go. Don't turn around.

     I didn't even look at the road signs as they
passed me by. I drove for another hour and stopped at
a gas station to get some gas, then I was off again. I
drove, the whole time forcing Justin out of my head.
After a bit of this, I pulled over to the side of the
road. They had George Strait playing. "Last in Love."
I started to cry as I listened to the lyrics.

     I pictured Justin as he stood in the doorway of
the studio. He had looked so hurt.

     I shook my head and told myself to stop it. That
it was enough. Justin had moved on, so why was it so
hard for me? I could do it. Somehow.

     I pulled the car back onto the road and drove for
another couple of hours. It was finally dark and the
stars were shining bright above me in its blackened
sky. I finally pulled into a small motel and rented a
room for the night. I decided to leave my cell phone
in the car. I knew that by now Lana had probably
called a kagillion times. Soon she would have the
police looking for me. That oddly, didn't seem to
phase me.

     I layed there on the motel bed, and clicked on
the TV.  Steel Magnolias was showing on HBO. I smiled,
remembering that I had watched this movie with my
mother when I was younger. It brung back some good
memories.

     I don't remember seeing the whole movie. I
remembered listening to Dolly Parton's character Truvy
talking to the other females; just gossiping as her
character was supposed to be potrayed as I was lulled
to sleep.

     Sunlight poured in from the small motel window
when I awoke, and I decided to hop into the shower.
Since the road trip was planned at the last minute, I
ended up having to put on the same clothes as I was
wearing.

     I walked outside and looked around. The motel was
out in the middle of nowhere. Desert was all that
could be seen for miles around. I came to the
conlcusion that I was in Nevada. Just one state over.
I looked down the road; the way I came. Then I looked
down the other end of the road. The way I was heading
before I pulled into the motel. In my mind, I was
battling myself to see if I had wanted to go back home
now, or keep driving. I decided to keep driving.

     Hopping into my car, I glanced at my cell phone
which sat in the passengers seat. It said I had 52
missed calls. All of them from Lana. I smiled. It was
nice to know she cared about me. A part of me felt bad
that I was ignoring her calls. But the truth was I
wasn't just ignoring hers. I was ignoring everyones.
This was me time.

     I headed down the road toward my unknown
destination at 80 miles an hour, my country music
blaring. I didn't realise it then, but Justin hadn't
entered my mind once that morning. All that was on my
mind was the road in front of me, and where it was
possibly going to take me.



CHAPTER 16


     My stomach gave way about noon, so I decided it
would be time to eat. I had seen nothing but the road
for the past fifty miles, so I was beginning to wonder
how long it was going to take before I was able to get
my stomach satisfied. After a few more miles, a blue
sign on the side of the road displayed a fork and a
spoon, a gas pump, and a bed, indicating to me that
there was a gas station, some food places, and an inn
not too far ahead.

     Five miles later, I saw a McDonalds sign as well
as a Shell Gas Station sign. I took that exit and
eagerly parked into the McDonalds parking lot. I
didn't bother to lock the car as I got out, figuring
nothing else was around for miles, that my car should
be safe.

     Inside, I sat by a window, staring out into the
oblivion as I ate. Desert was no longer what I was
looking at. Now it was nothing but trees. Trees and
grass for miles. I had no idea  where I was, but I
didn't question it. The whole idea was to get away and
get my mind off of things. I made a note to myself
that this was the first time I had ever done anything
so spontaeous as this. I smiled. This was kind of cool
in a way.

     I was back in the car about twenty minutes later.
I decided to go ahead and fill up at the Shell station
seeing how I didn't want to be stopping anywhere else
anytime soon. Obviously, though I did not know where
the hell I was heading, I seemed to tell myself there
was not any time to waste. Since I had left Los
Angeles my only need was to be behind the wheel.

     I glanced down at my phone realising it hadn't
been ringing in a while. Nothing was displayed which
meant my phone had probably died. I didn't bring the
charger, and I did not have one for the car, so I was
out of luck with a phone. Oh well, I thought. It's not
like you were going to answer it.

**                 **       **                   **

     I had been driving for a couple of days. Stopping
to get gas every now and then, and renting a motel
room at nights. I started to notice that I was running
low on money. I definately needed it for gas, so I
decided instead of getting motel rooms, to just find a
rest area and sleep in the car. It sounded simple
enough.

     I had lost all track of time and what the date
was. So I couldn't tell you what date and time my car
decided to start smoking under the hood. All I know is
that I had just reached a sign that said "You Are Now
Entering Rogers City Limit."

     I pulled over on the side of the road. Getting
out of my car, I walked to the front prepared to open
the hood. I had never been the type of person to know
anything about cars, so this was all new to me. I
didn't expect to know anything when I popped the hood,
but I figured it couldn't hurt. I ended up coughing up
a storm, as I lifted the hood to see what the problem
was. All I could see was smoke. It smelled like a
sweet smell, but at the same time, it stank.

     I groaned and walked back around to the drivers
side; the hood still open. Sitting in the drivers seat
I reached for the phone.

     Shit. I forgot that it was dead. So I couldn't
call Roadside Assistance or anyone. Not even Lana.

     I thought about what her reaction would be if I
told her I had taken a little trip and had no idea
where I was. I laughed to myself knowing she would
freak out. Hell, she was probably freaking out right
now. I hadn't called her in days.

     I heard the sound of a vehicle coming up, not too
far behind me. I glanced back to see a small blue pick
up truck, that looked like it was made in the 60's
slow down. A young boy with a cowboy hat on peered at
me as he drove by. Suddenly, his truck pulled along
side of the road in front of my car.

     I didn't know what to think. I was already a bit
nervous. I get like that with strangers. People I
didn't know.

     The boy hopped out of his truck. He looked young.
About nineteen. He was tanned, with brown eyes.  He
was wearing some brown cowboy boots, some dark blue
wranglers, a white t-shirt, and of course the straw
cowboy hat. He was actually kind of cute.

     "Got some car trouble there I see," He said as he
walked towards me. He had a strong southern accent
which made me question to myself for the first time,
where the hell I was.

     I hopped out of the drivers seat and back to the
front of the car. "Yea, you can say that."

     "Ya know at all what's wrong with it then?" The
boy asked as he walked up beside me and looked under
the hood at all the machinery.

     "No, I am not much of a car person. All that I
know is that it was smoking really bad."

     He looked at me and smiled. "You from up north
huh?"

     "No, why do you ask?"

     He chuckled. "No reason, I guess."

     "I'm from Texas," I told him. "But I recently
moved to Los Angeles."

     "California eh? What brings ya to these parts?"

     I opened my mouth to say something, but nothing
came out. Probably because I didn't know how to answer
that question. "Where exactly am I?"

     "Well," He said taking his cowboy hat off and
wiping the sweat off his forehead. "I would say from
the looks of it, you are in Rogers, Arkansas."

     My eyes got real big. "Are you serious!"

     "Ain't got no reason to lie to ya." He put his
hat back on his blonde head. He looked back down at my
car. "Well I guess the only thing to do is to take it
to the shop and let'em figure out what is wrong with
your car here."

     "I don't have the money to be taking it to anyone
to fix it," I told him.

     "I see," the boy replied.

     I threw my hands in the air in frustration.
"Great, just great. Why the hell did I even think that
this would be a good idea. Did I even think something
like this could happen? No, because I don't think. I
never think. Which is why I always seem to have
something like this happening to me...Of course, RJ!
Take a trip. Get away because things don't go your
way...and when the hell did I become so self absorbed?
I used to never be like this. Did I? FUCK!"

     "Whoa, whoa," the cowboy said. "Calm down.
Obviously, you been through alot. Just calm down. It
ain't all that bad."

     I looked at him feeling stupid. I just had a
temper tantrum on the side of the road on the Rogers
City Limits in front of a complete stranger.

     "I have no idea what I am going to do," I finally
told him. "I kind of just took off from Los Angeles at
the last minute. I have been in the same clothes for
days, my cell phone is dead, and im low on money. Kind
of stupid eh?"

     He shook his head. "Nah, it ain't stupid. Sounds
like you was trying to get away. Sometimes its good to
get away. Life can sometimes get frustrated."

     I smiled. This guy seemed nice.

     "Still don't know what I am going to do." I told
him.

     He closed the hood of my car. "Well, I got a
friend in town that owns a mechanic shop... I can see
what I can do. But there can't be any promises its
going to be fixed today."

     I didn't see any other choice. "Alright I guess."

     "We are going to have to leave tha car here
though," He told me. "Til' we can find someone to come
out here and tow it back to town."

     "That's alright. I guess I can stay here with it
until then."

     "Nah, don't do that. Come on, hop in tha truck.
It may take hours before a tow truck comes back out
here. I'll take ya to town. Get ya something to eat or
something."

     I looked back at the car. Then back at him. He
sure was cute.

     "Okay, let me just grab my things from the car."
I told him. I grabbed my satchel and cell phone and
locked the car up.

     A few moments later, I was in the truck riding
with the cowboy, going into the small town of Rogers,
Arkansas.

     Looking over at the cowboy, I thought of Justin.
Once again, I pictured him at the doorway of the
studio with that hurt look on his face. Somehow Justin
had a strong hold on me. It kind of sucked to know
that someone had your heart in their hands. Justin
seemed to know it, which hurt even more.

     "What is your name?" I asked the cowboy.

     "Ray." He told me. "Ray Higgins."

     I smiled. Such a country name. It was kind of
adorable.

     "Whats yours?" He asked me.

     "Rj." I told him.

     "Rj? Just Rj? What's it stand for?"

     "Ronnie Junior." I told him. And then felt my
face go red. My name was just as country as his once
you say it out loud.

      "Nice to meet ya, RJ," Ray said. "And welcome to
Rogers, Arkansas."



Okay, there is Chapter 15 and 16...
Please email me with your comments.. please