Date: Tue, 29 Oct 2002 03:46:53 GMT
From: Music_fan <Music_fan@subdimension.com>
Subject: Where Do We Go #60

Disclaimer:

   Here is chapter 60, the next chapter in an ongoing story about
Stephen Gately from Boyzone and Eloy de Jong, formerly of Caught in the
Act.  I do hope you like this one, and please write and tell
me what you think.

    I have no contact with either of the gentlemen in question and such
literature is the product of the author's imagination.

   Cheers,

   Musicfan



###


     Louis called a meeting a few days later and the lads all trouped over
to his office in downtown Dublin.  Keith picked Stephen up on his way in
and met the others outside the office.

     "What do you suppose his nibs is up to this time?" Mike asked warily.
He was also annoyed because Louis wasn't there yet and they were forced to
sit around and wait for him to show up.

      Shane slouched down on the sofa, legs stretched out.  He shrugged,
not really caring why they were there.  Mikey turned away and looked
towards Ronan.  He usually had a good idea what Louis' latest and greatest
idea was going to be, but Ronan just shrugged.  Stephen sat down next to
Shane and pulled his Gameboy out.  He knew that they would have a wait and
had planned accordingly.  Shane peered over his shoulder and watched him
play while the others waited restlessly.

      "He did say he was on his way, didn't he, Frannie?" Keith asked,
stopping by her desk to take a piece of candy out of the bowl and pop it in
his mouth.  She nodded, giving him an absentminded smile as the phone rang.

      "Don't bother Frannie, she has enough problems without you nagging,"
Stephen said without looking up.  Keith shot him a look before resuming his
pacing again.  Finally the door opened and Louis walked through.

     "Ah, there you are lads!" He cried jovially. "Right on time!"  He
walked past them to his office door and opened it, waving them through.
Stephen shoved his game in the pocket of his sweatshirt and followed the
others through.  A small smile crept across his face as they entered the
room and he mentally compared it to the rattrap that Louis had some years
before when they were just starting out.  This new office was much more
opulent, and most of the decorations were gold and platinum albums from
Boyzone as well as the awards placed about the room.  While Louis' stable
of artists had grown considerably, none had achieved the same type of
success as they had, though some were on their way.  Louis was always
looking out for new groups to sign and more often than not they got their
feet wet as a support act for Boyzone.

     "Sit down, sit down!" Louis said, waving to the leather sofas off to
one side of his office.  They sat down as he walked around the desk and
rummaged for something.  "Ah, there it is! Knew it was around here
somewhere.  Lads, have I a treat for you!"  He walked back over to where
they were settled and perched himself on the arm of the chair on which
Ronan sat.  "Feast your eyes on this," he said, passing the document to
Ronan while the others leaned forward, eager to see what Louis' latest scam
was.  Amongst themselves, they referred to his schemes as scams because in
the early days more often than not they used to be smoke and mirror ideas
designed to get them exposure of some kind.

     "What is it?" Mike asked, not wanting to wait for Ronan to tell them.
Louis leaned back and crossed his arms with a smile as Ronan looked up in
surprise.

     "That is your ticket into every home in Europe!" Louis announced.
"Lads, you were just chosen to be the Pepsi group for their charity. It
means a commercial, a song for charity, which will always make you look
good, and extra concerts."

     Ronan passed the sheaf of papers along and each of them was able to
read the contract for them to perform for Pepsi in a commercial as well as
making promotional appearances.  As they looked over the paperwork, Louis
described how it was going to work.

     "Lads, trust me, we can't miss with this. We can throw something
together for you to sing, or dig up something you haven't done all that
much and all you have to do is this one little commercial.  What more could
we want?  There ya go, just pass the pen along, Ronan and then we can get
this all sorted."

     Each of them signed, though Mikey took a while to look more thoroughly
through the contract, much to Louis' annoyance.  There had been so many
things over the years that they had signed that most of the time they just
went along with the rest.  By this time they all knew what to look for, and
were savvy enough to catch things.  This was one of the standard
performance contracts, which is why the others hadn't been too bothered to
go through the fine print.

     "When are we supposed do all this?" Keith asked, thinking ahead to
other things they had planned.  Louis waved off the details, saying that
none of it mattered too much.  He said he'd get them into the studio to put
something together, but he wasn't worried too much at the details.

     "What about the next single?" Mikey asked, thinking about the
promotion they were supposed to do for that in the next few weeks.

      "People have been clamouring for No Matter What to be release for a
while now, so I don't even think we need to worry about how that one is
going to sell," Louis said blithely. "And this will be guaranteed to keep
your names in the press.  So I think this will be what does the job for
you," he said, tapping the sheath of papers in his hand.  He went on to
talk about how Fran would be in touch once arrangements were made and then
he ushered them out the door, holding Ronan back to talk to him about
something.  Stephen looked over his shoulder as he walked out the door,
wondering what Louis was up to this time.  Ronan gave him a wink and a
shrug as the door closed and Stephen followed his band mates down the
stairs after saying goodbye to Fran.

       "What do you suppose that's all about?" Mikey asked as they walked
out onto the sidewalk. He was naturally suspicious of anything Louis did
with one of them on their own and had a feeling that Louis was up to
something else.

       "Who knows with that one?" Shane said laconically.  He leaned
against the wall and watched the traffic go by while the rest of them stood
around, waiting for Ronan to come out.  After a few minutes Mikey gave up
and headed for his car after waving to the others in farewell.  Shane said
he had better things to do than hold the wall up and took off as well.

      "That leaves us, Steve.  Need a ride home?" Keith asked.  Stephen
nodded and they walked down the street to where Keith had his Rolls parked.
The white car was his pride and joy, something he always drove when he had
the chance in at home.  As they got into the car, Keith said he wanted to
drop by the shop where Lisa worked.  Stephen was fine with that, as he
adored Keith's wife.  They drove through the city with the top down, Keith
practically preening as people admired his car.  Stephen had to laugh to
himself at Keith's expression.

      They stopped briefly on Grafton Street to visit Lisa.  She was busy
on the telephone when they arrived and only had a little time to spend with
Keith before heading out to a meeting with a designer. While they were in
the back of the shop, Stephen stayed in the front chatting to the girls
working there, content to give Keith some private time with his wife.  When
Keith and Lisa came out of the back office a short while later, Stephen was
amused to see the silly smile on Keith's face as Lisa kissed him before
heading off to her meeting.  She gave Stephen a hug on the way out the
door, and turned to tell Keith that she would be home early before leaving.

      "She asked me to go pick up Jordan at her folks.  You up for that?"
Keith asked as they waved goodbye to the girls as they left the store.
Stephen nodded as he followed Keith out the door.  They got in the car and
headed off to pick up Keith's son...


* * *


     An insistent tapping on the tabletop made Eloy raise his gaze from the
tabletop to see what was going on.

     "Ah, you're back to the real world.  Thank you for joining us," CITA's
manager said dryly once he had gotten Eloy's attention.  "As I was saying
before Eloy drifted off, I'm a little concerned about the way the company
has been shifting around the schedule.  It hasn't helped us with promotion,
and the fact that we're not getting airplay on the new single is their
fault because they're not pushing it properly. So we need to do our own
self-promotion and do it right. Now here's what I want to do..."

      Try as he might, Eloy found he couldn't concentrate on what Johannes
was saying.  He had never been one for management details in the first
place, and recently all he could do was think about Stephen.  He ached to
be with the other man, and at the moment, anything that interfered with
that seemed to be a lesser priority.  Including his career, which
frightened him a little.  Lee had to pull his attention back to the
conversation a couple of times, but he was relieved once the meeting was
over.  He was just getting up to go back to his room when Johannes held him
back while the others left.  Ben shot a concerned look over his shoulder as
he left the room and Eloy gave him a reassuring grin as the door closed.

    "Eloy, I don't know who the hell has caught your fancy this time, but
dammit we don't have the time for you to go off dreaming when things are
this tight," Johannes said in a low voice, angry at having been blithely
ignored by Eloy during the meeting.  "One wrong move would really hurt the
group right now and that's the last thing you can afford."

     Eloy looked down; abashed that Johannes had correctly pegged the
reason for his lack of attention.  "I'm sorry."

     "Ja, I'm sure you are," his manager muttered, turning to stare out the
window for a few moments as he got his temper under control. "I don't know
who he is and I don't want to know, but keep it under wraps. The last thing
we need is the record company having to deal with that kind of news popping
up.  Okay?"

     "Trust me, neither of us wants that," Eloy said, feeling slightly sick
at the thought of what would happen to Stephen if the news came out about
the two of them.  It was something that they had talked about when they
were together, and Stephen's stories of sleepless nights waiting for
someone to ask the wrong question had struck a chord deep inside him.

     "Then whatever you do, keep it discreet and don't draw attention to
yourself."  Johannes tiredly ran a hand through his thinning hair and
turned back to face Eloy.  "Go on now, you have a busy night and I want you
to get some rest before you go on stage."

     Eloy nodded and left without another word.  When he came out into the
hall, he saw Ben still lurking down the end, waiting for him to come out.
He gave his friend a smile and nodded his head towards their rooms.  Ben
followed him inside and asked if everything was all right.  Eloy told him
that Johannes had just chewed him out for woolgathering and that he was
fine.  Still dubious, Ben let the conversation go at that and headed back
to his room.  Eloy collapsed on the bed with a sigh and stared up at the
ceiling, thoughts whirling.  After a few moments of debating with himself,
he picked up his mobile and rang Stephen.

     "Hey," Stephen answered the phone on the second ring.

     "Hey yourself," Eloy said, a smile crossing his face at the sound of
his lover's voice.  "You naked and ready to chat to me?"

     Stephen burst into laughter at Eloy audacious comment.  "No, not
exactly."

     "No?" Eloy responded, trying to sound disappointed.  "You mean you
don't just sit around waiting for me to call just to have a dirty
conversation?"

      Stephen was still laughing, shaking his head as Eloy continued. "No,
love, I don't."  He was sitting in the car waiting for Keith to come out
with Jordan.  "In fact, I'm sitting in Keith's car with the top down
waiting for him to come out with his son.  Hardly the place I'd want to be
sitting around naked."

     "Oh?" Eloy asked, a grin crossing his face.  "I think you'd look
ravishing if you did that."  A snort met his comment and he laughed again.
"No?"

     "No," Stephen said firmly.  "How are you," he asked, changing the
subject before the conversation could degrade even further.

     "Not too bad. Just waiting before a show tonight." Eloy admitted.
"How about you, zusje?"

     "Grand, hon." Stephen said.  He went on to tell Eloy the news about
being chosen as the Pepsi artist and the commercial they were supposed to
do for it. "Louis seems to think that this is a treat, though what it
really seems is more work in time we don't have already.  I just hope it
pays off the way he seems to think it will."

     Eloy felt mixed emotions about Stephen's news.  On one hand he was
thrilled for his lover that he was going to be given the chance at exposure
in countries they hadn't really had hits in.  But another side of him knew
that with the increased work, that they'd have even less time to call their
own.  He didn't let his thoughts colour the enthusiasm he voiced for
Stephen's news though.

     "How long is all that supposed to take?" Eloy asked.  Stephen told him
it hadn't been settled yet because Louis was still working at the details.
Their conversation was cut short as Eloy heard the excited chatter of
Keith's son as he got into the car and said his hellos to Stephen.  "I
guess I better let you go then."

     "Yeah, I guess.  I'll give you a ring later, okay?"  Stephen said,
turning in his seat to wink at Jordan as Keith buckled him into the car
seat in the back.  "Good luck tonight."

      "Thanks," Eloy said.  "Talk to you later."  He hung up the phone, a
little disappointed with the conversation.  But the more he thought about
it, the more he knew that there would always be a time when one of them
wasn't free to chat. He chewed his lip, pensive.  He also thought back to
his conversation with Johannes, abashed at the way he had acted.  He vowed
that he was going to be more attentive in the future, and to not let it get
in the way of his work.  That decided, he got up and went to go find his
friends so they could spend some time together before the evening
performance...


* * *

     As evening drew to a close, Stephen sat at the kitchen table at his
house, putting some lyrics to paper.  He really enjoyed having the evenings
to himself with nothing to distract him.  Keith had invited him over for
dinner, but Stephen had demurred, wanting some time to himself.  So, after
making himself a sandwich, he sat down at the kitchen table with the
notebook that he habitually carried his song ideas in, and fleshed out the
lyrics he had been working on.  It wasn't until he had gone through the
pitcher of ice tea and his bladder began to complain that he realised he
had been sitting there for hours.  He had been so absorbed in what he was
doing that he hadn't been aware of the passing time.

     He blinked owlishly at his watch, finding it hard to focus after
staring at the paper so long.  Around him were piles of papers that he had
put aside.  He was slightly astonished with both the time and the amount of
work he had gotten done.  His back creaked as he stretched and he had to
shake the tingle out of his hand, he had been holding onto the pen so long.

     The insistent twinge from his bladder prompted him to move.  He got
up, wincing as the pressure increased and almost hobbled over to the
downstairs bathroom.  Afterwards, he cleaned up and headed upstairs to bed.
He wondered if Eloy was going to be able to chat before bed, but considered
just letting him relax for the night.  Despite the joking earlier, there
had been a bit of tension in his voice that worried Stephen.  He chewed his
lip thoughtfully as he shut off the downstairs light and climbed the stairs
to his bedroom.  By the time he had washed up in the bathroom, he had
changed his mind again.  He wanted to hear Eloy's voice again.

     Having made his decision, he sat down on the bed and leaned up against
the wall, pulling the telephone onto his lap.  It was just after midnight
for Eloy, so hopefully he was back in his apartment or hotel room. Wherever
he was tonight.  Stephen blinked as he realised he didn't quite know where
Eloy was.  So he dialed Eloy's mobile.


* * *


     Eloy had just gotten back to his hotel room after the after show party
when he felt his mobile vibrate.  With a glance to his watch he smiled,
knowing that it was Stephen on the other end.

     "Hey babe," he said in a low voice as he dropped down onto the sofa.

     "Is that how you always answer the phone?" Stephen asked teasingly,
trying to sound affronted.

     "Yeah, because only my babes call me on my private number," Eloy
responded, a grin sliding across his face.  He kicked off his shoes and
stretched his feet out, stifling a sigh.

     "Is that a fact?" Stephen demanded.  "And how many babes do you have
calling you?"

     "Hmmm, just one at the moment," Eloy admitted, deciding to let Stephen
off lightly in his teasing.

     "For the moment and for the future, buster!" Stephen threatened over
the phone before giving into a chuckle.  "You brat."

     "Not me, honing.  I am never a brat," Eloy said firmly.

     "Hmmm, that's not what your mother said," Stephen joked, making them
both laugh before subsiding into a comfortable silence.  "How'd it go
tonight?"

     "Goed, goed," Eloy said, thinking back to their performance that
night.  "It was one of those good ones, where everything seemed to sync.
You know?"  Stephen murmured his response.  "I made a resolution that I
have to pay more attention at group meetings, too.  Johannes had my head
today for not paying attention to what he was saying."

     "And why weren't you paying attention?" Stephen wanted to know.

     "Because I couldn't stop thinking about you," Eloy admitted softly.
There was a pause as Stephen digested that bit of information before
replying.

     "E, that's lovely, but don't let thoughts of me get you in trouble
with the group," he said seriously.  He was staring up at the ceiling,
having lain down once they had started talking.

      "Ja, I know.  But sometimes something happens that makes me think of
you and I'm off.  That's what happened today," Eloy admitted.

     "Was Johannes upset?" Stephen wanted to know, worrying about how much
Eloy's fellow band mates and management knew.

     "Ja, he was pretty upset.  Especially as he was talking about a shake
up at the record company and how they haven't been promoting us properly.
But Johannes can be a worrywart a lot of the time, so I think its just more
of the same." Eloy said, shrugging it off.  He didn't want to talk about
his manager, now that he had some time alone with Stephen.  "Anyhow, what
did you do with yourself after picking up Keith's son?"

     "Hmmm, not much," Stephen admitted.  "Keith dropped me off, I made
some dinner and worked on some stuff I'd been playing around with for a
bit.  Then I'd thought I'd ring you, so here we are."

     "Mmmm, here we are," Eloy agreed.  "Let me get comfortable so we can
chat. Tell me some more about this new gig."  With the phone propped
against his ear with his shoulder, Eloy listened to Stephen tell him Louis'
plans for Boyzone as he got undressed.  He turned off the lights and made
the way over to his bed where he lay down in the dark.  Lying like this
with Stephen speaking softly into his ear was as close as he was going to
get to having Stephen there by his side for a while.  And while not the
most satisfying experience, he made due with what he could get.

     "Honing, I hope it works out for you.  With all the hard work you do,
you deserve a break like that," he said warmly. He could tell how excited
Stephen was about it and wanted him to do well.  He pushed his own problems
back, not wanting to change the mood of their conversation.

     "Enough about me, have you been able to check out what your schedule
is going to be like?" Stephen asked, still wanting to make plans for when
they could meet up in London.

     "Sorry honing, I haven't had a chance," Eloy said.  In truth, he had
been afraid to ask Johannes, knowing how upset his manager had been
earlier.  In fact, it sounded like Johannes was going to do their promotion
for them and get them even more work, since the record company had done
such a poor job of it themselves.  "There just hasn't been time."

     "Don't think I'm pushing you, love, because I don't mean to," Stephen
said, sensitive to Eloy's mood.  "But maybe we can find some time when I
get back, yeah?"

    "Ja, I'd like that," Eloy responded.  They went on to talk about little
things and hopes for getting together.  Stephen made sure that he let Eloy
know that there was no pressure, but whenever he could find some time in
his schedule.  After a while the late hour got to them both so they decided
to call it a night.

    "Sleep tight, sweetheart," Stephen wished his lover as he tried to
stifle a yawn.

    "Mmmm, you too, honing," Eloy said, not bothering to hide his.  "I'll
let you know when I find out anything."

     "You do that, babe.  We'll make do," Stephen promised. "I love you."

     Eloy closed his eyes as he savoured Stephen's comment.  "I love you
too, zusje.  Goednight."

     "Goodnight, baby," Stephen said softly in response.  He kept the
receiver to his ear until he heard Eloy hang up before reluctantly placing
his phone down.  While over the last couple of weeks they had been good
about their chats, he still felt a sense of incompleteness.  He knew that
their schedules were going to conflict, but he still hoped that they would
have fewer obstacles to their getting together.  He sighed and moved the
phone onto the floor next to his mattress.  Shutting the light, he lay back
in the dark and replayed their conversation through his head.  He wasn't
sure if he was just being paranoid, but it seemed like Eloy had been rather
distracted.  He certainly hadn't been as playful as he had been in the
past, and that worried Stephen because he felt like Eloy might be holding
something back.  He chewed on his lip thoughtfully, but knew he wasn't
going to find an answer staring at the ceiling in the dark.  After a
moment's pause he made a concerted effort to go to sleep.  Perhaps with the
coming day things would be clearer....


 # # #

     Such wishes didn't seem to be in the cards as Stephen made the mad
dash to get ready for recording the commercial for Pepsi.  The band had
several meetings with Louis as new information came in about their
promotion and since they didn't have a lot of time to put anything
together, they pulled out the song they did when they hosted the Eurovision
contest the year before and decided upon it as the single for the
commercial.

     The next few weeks were a blur as they rushed to London to film the
commercial and then went right into a promotional tour that was already in
progress for Pepsi.  It did give them the chance to also promote their
upcoming single, No Matter What, but the pace that was set for them was
horrific.

     One day lead to the next with no time for late night chats to loved
ones, as they toured from one city to another, doing promotional
appearances for Pepsi.  They took a late night flight to Copenhagen for a
show there, and each of them were looking pretty dazed by the pace that was
set as they got off the plane and went out to their awaiting transport to
the hotel.

     "Lord, what a sorry sight we are," Ronan chuckled, glancing around the
van at his band mates.  Keith was all but passed out in a corner, hand over
his eyes.  Mikey was trying to stretch out a sore back that he got from
sleeping wrong on the plane.  He tried not to jab anyone near him as he
winced and moved.  Shane was asleep, resting his head on Stephen's
shoulder.  Stephen meanwhile, was just staring out the window.  He hadn't
been able to sleep on the flight over and was blinking blearily in the
early morning light.

     "Weren't we here just yesterday?" Mikey mumbled. Ronan nodded
ruefully.  The way their schedules had been, it did seem like it was only
yesterday when they had arrived in the city to do a television show not too
long ago.  "What was that film me Mam used to love?  'If This is Tuesday,
it Must Be Belgium?'  I think I know how those people felt."

     Ronan nodded in agreement.  Often their travels from country to
country and city to city were such a blur that they couldn't even tell
where they had been afterwards.  They never really had a chance to look
around at the places they visited, their trips were so tightly scheduled.
He kept on promising to himself that he was going to try to look around and
enjoy the place that he was at, and never seemed to be able to do it.  The
only reason why they had seen as much of New York as they had was because
they had been working on the album, and had been given a lot of free reign
since it had been also a bit of a holiday.

     They soon arrived at their hotel and gratefully stepped out of the van
and into the lobby.  Stephen had to shake Shane awake long enough to get
out.  After checking in, they were shown to their rooms, each of them weary
beyond belief.

     Stephen gratefully closed the door to his room after turning on the
light. They didn't have to go to the racetrack where the concert was being
held until the next morning so he was looking forward to just curling up in
bed and getting some sleep.  He was never the best at falling asleep on
planes, and this time had been no exception to the rule.  With barely a
glance to make sure that his bag wasn't in a place where he'd be likely to
trip upon waking up, he stripped and fell into bed.

 * * *

  It seemed like no time had passed before he was awake again, feeling only
slightly refreshed.  He stared up at the ceiling, groggily wondering what
had woken him.  A glance at the phone didn't reveal the tell tale light of
a message, so he rolled over and blearily thought of getting up.  Inertia
weighted down his limbs and he lay for the longest time trying to get the
energy to get out of bed.  He was vaguely aware of an insistent pressure
from his bladder, but it wasn't enough to wake him.  A shadow in one corner
of the room startled him as he thought he saw something move in the
darkened area.  Though he told himself that nothing was there, he couldn't
shake the feeling that he was being watched.  After a few moments of trying
to ignore it and failing, he turned on the light, banishing the shadows
from the room.

     By this point the demand for the bathroom became more urgent, so he
acquiesced to the need and made his way to the bathroom.  Upon his return,
he groaned.  Only 5 hours had passed and he was still tired.  He stared at
the bed, wondering if he could get back to sleep, but a glance at the still
dark corner of the room stopped him from returning to the inviting
mattress.  He tried to look at the clock and find out what time it was, but
everything was too blurry to his sleep dazed eyes. He thought about ringing
Eloy, but knew what pressure the other man had been under over the last few
weeks as well, so he dismissed that idea, though he really wanted to chat
with his lover.

     With a sigh he turned to the tv, turning to see if there was something
to distract him.  He curled up on the sofa, the throw pillow on the arm and
was soon back asleep with the sounds of the sitcom lulling him into
dreamland....