Date: Wed, 14 Jun 2006 15:02:33 -0700 (PDT)
From: Alvaro Lopez <lopezbos@yahoo.com>
Subject: Candy Store Diaries, Part II

[Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Any similarities between actual
events and the events in this story or the characters in this story are
purely coincidental. This story involves descriptions of unsafe sexual
acts between men for the purpose of erotic fantasy and is not intended to
condone such acts. If you are underage or homoerotic material is
otherwise illegal in your area, please do not continue. Author retains
copyright; do not duplicate this story without express written consent by
the author. Comments and suggestions are welcomed at lopezbos@yahoo.com]

Candy Store Diaries, Part II

April 19, 19XX
Heard back from Carly (Carla?) Rico's gf's friend. Sounds nice, but a
little vacant. After Leslie, I'm done with vapid chicks, no matter how
hot they look.

Meeting Anthony tomorrow, psyched.

April 20, 19XX
Rico came up for the workout but he was in a piss-poor mood. He's mad at
his girlfriend because she had a bit too much to drink at a family
get-together and acted a little too slutty for Rico's parents' taste.
Nickie's wife wasn't too thrilled either, since apparently she made a
few comments about him indirectly. Rico didn't say so, but the way he
was lifting made me think he's a little jealous of big brother's big
biceps.

Biceps. Anthony. Met him at his house (mistake number one). He lives in
the burbs, nice looking split-level thing with a lawn and fences, right
out of the picture books. He made me park down the street and walk up, so
I checked the address a couple of times just to be sure. Even had a story
ready in case I got the wrong house. But I got the right house.

Anthony's pics are probably five or six years old. Mistake number two.
He's lost a ton of hair, and what's on his body is graying quick. He
was built, but it was sagging in places it shouldn't. After Ronnie, I
know I'm being very tough on him, but I know what tight muscles look
(and feel) like. So I'm having a beer at his kitchen table, we're
talking about nothing and I'm trying not to look around and all his shit
that screams suburban married guy. I felt like a fuckin homewrecker
(mistake number two: go with the gut). He offers to take me on a tour of
his house, and I agree, mostly because I'm sick of hearing about the
lawn care problems. He takes me around the deck, then downstairs to his
`office' which is a vintage rec-room style thing that looked like my
parents' house when I was a little kid. He asks me if I know anything
about computers (we talked about that on line) and I said yeah, so he
asks me to see if I can show him how to clean up his system just in case
his wife comes poking around.

I sit at the desk, and he puts his hands on my shoulders and starts
massaging. If he'd been more gentle, it would have been nice, but it
felt a little rough for me. I started cleaning up his machine, and he
runs his hands down my chest and starts tweaking my tits. As in hurt.
Partly a turn on, but again, rougher than necessary. Then I feel his wood
on my back, he's rubbing his crotch against my shoulders. I'd pretty
much decided I wasn't going to do anything with him by now, there was no
spark there, but feeling that hard-on was getting me hot. Same thing as
before: Knowing I was the cause of the hard-on made me feel hot. I leaned
back into it, then reached over my shoulder to get a grab.

Even through his pants it felt big, meaty. I remembered the pics he'd
sent of his swollen member, and those at least seemed to be accurate. I
rubbed, and he spun me around. He grabbed his zipper, flipped it open and
his turgid cock flopped out. I though Rick's was a good size, but this
was fuckin huge. It must have been six or seven inches around, and even
half-limp was a good seven or eight long. The slick head was dark red and
looked heavy. "Suck it" he ordered, and I did, even though I wasn't
really going to. As I took that head into my lips, he grabbed my head and
pushed me into him. I had no choice but to take it or choke. I swallowed
hard, and he pushed deeper, and I felt the cock getting harder in my
mouth. This turned me on, even while my brain was demanding I stop and
leave. I wasn't so much sucking him as trying to breathe around the meat
swelling in my mouth.

He pulled out to let me catch my breath, then started again. With one
hand he held my head clamped on to his tool with the other he pulled my
shirt over my head. I was liking this a little too much. He stroked my
chest and I reached up to stroke his. He was certainly hairy, and the
muscles were there, even if they were a little worn. He undid his pants
and they dropped (no underwear). I looked up at him, at least as much as
I could. From that angle he was pretty hot, but I got the image of
sucking off my uncle and just cooled off real fast. I wanted to stop,
pulled back a little, but Anthony grabbed by head with both hands and
proceeded to shove his cock into my mouth.

I put my hands on his thighs and pushed, hard. His cock exited with an
incongruous `pop' and I got to my feet fast. I told him I didn't like
that, and that I should go. Then he got pissed, called me a tease, and
threw me out. I grabbed my shirt and headed for the door fast. Never
again.

April 22, 19XX
Still a little freaked by the whole Anthony thing. Sam says it's not
unusual to run into that, and that I was a total ass-wipe to go to his
house without meeting him someplace first. The more I think about it, the
dumber I feel. Guess I've been lucky so far.

I did tell Rico a little about what happened, though not the gory cock
sucking details. I think he could figure out by the context what was
going on. He got pissed at me for being an idiot and made me promise that
whenever I went out on a blind date from now own that I'd leave the name
and address on my table so if I wasn't back he'd know where to look for
me. I thought that was a pretty good idea, and pretty sweet too.

Rico's having his own issues with Loretta. Now his family is pressuring
him to dump her ass. Even Nickie's weighed in on it, which if I know
Rico, is the kiss of death for her. Rico talks about Nickie like he's a
super-human, not just physically, but morally too.

Workout was more intense than usual, I think we were both burning off
anxieties.

April 26, 19XX
Wild weekend.

Friday: Sam comes over half-drunk and roughed up. All the advice, and he
doesn't keep any for himself. Patched him up and let him spend the night
on my couch, only I wake up with him in my bed. Have to admit it was
nice, but not with Sam. Sort of like enjoying sleeping in the same bed
with your sister.

Saturday: Rico comes up and Sam's in the shower, and Rico goes into this
weird embarrass mode. I told him Sam was a friend, not a `friend' and
he chilled, until he met Sam. Rico doesn't like `sissy boys' as he
calls them, and Sam couldn't take his eyes off Rico, which made it
worse. I knew Rico wasn't up to work out (we don't work out on
weekends) so I gave Sam the `leave now' look, but he was too engrossed
with Rico. I practically had to kick him out. I called him a cab.

Rico had a fight with Loretta, shortly after catching her on-line with
another guy. She was packing up and Rico needed to get the hell out of
Dodge but not so far that she could swipe his stuff. He was pissed,
upset, and the whole Sam thing threw him. I told him to hang out at my
place, I was going to my mother's anyway. By the time I left he'd
calmed down and agreed to stay, and I hung out with him until lunch.

Mom was also in a piss-poor mood, so the visit was short. Must be the
moon or something.

Sunday: I'm supposed to be meeting this guy (Charlie) for dinner. He's
an older guy, nice pictures, seems pretty normal on the phone, yadda
yadda. So as I'm heading out of the building, I hear Rico in his
apartment banging and thumping, so I'm wondering what the hell is going
on and hoping Loretta isn't getting pummeled. I knock, and a very drunk
Rico answers the door. His place is trashed, looks like a fuckin dump.
Clothes everywhere, broken stuff on the floor, like a crime scene. He
looks like shit too, he's out of breath, sweating like a mule, and
pretty scary. I ask him if everything's ok and he tries to act
non-chalant,  only he's shitfaced so it comes out pretty funny. Took me
a good two hours to sober him up and clean up the mess. I didn't need a
program to figure out why he got toasted. I knew he liked Loretta a lot,
had hoped to marry her. Funny thing is, I know exactly why he's pissed
at himself: For the colossal waste of time being with someone you know
deep down is the wrong person. If I could have trashed my hospital room,
I probably would have.

Called Charlie to apologize, he said no problem, sweet guy.

April 27, 19XX
Make-up date with Charlie, but lunch downtown. Turns out he's married
too (of course). The thing is, I'm not looking for the love of my life,
so it may work out OK. Maybe I should actually look for married guys?
Charlie's OK, I'm not sure he'd curl my toes too much. He asked me a
lot of questions, felt like I was on a job interview sometimes. I really
didn't have too many questions for him, I mean, I don't really care
what kind of music he likes or what he reads. Shit, am I turning into a
slut?

April 29, 19XX
Haven't seen Rico in three days now, he's not at his apartment, and I
don't know his parents' phone number. Trying not to worry, but starting
to. Sam says I'm being a mother hen.

Got a decision to make. Charlie wants to meet up again, at my place this
time. I have to admit, I've been thinking a lot about going all the way
as a bottom guy, and Charlie is certainly a candidate, but I'm just not
there yet. I want to, but it's gotta be a guy I'll see again, not just
a one-time fuck. Charlie could go either way. After the Anthony scene,
I'm not sure I want to risk it, although Charlie doesn't seem anything
like Anthony.

Speaking of which, actually got an e-mail from Anthony the Asshole. Not
even apologetic, just the opposite. Said I really turned him on and he
wanted to see me again. Didn't answer it of course, but it gave me the
creeps. I looked at his on-line picture again and can't believe what a
liar he is.

May 2, 19XX
My life is starting to look like a soap opera.

Rico appeared, looking a bit like shit. He went on a serious bender,
headed upstate and drank his way back. He said he needed the time to get
his head together and now feels better. After five solid days of
drinking, just not falling down would make me feel better. We talked
about Loretta and Leslie a lot, sort of cathartic. Great workout, nothing
like rage to get you going.

Charlie e-mailed again, looking for some time next week. I suggested we
take a walk and talk some more and he agreed. Chatted on line, and I
don't know if he was fantasizing or serious, but he suggested that I
meet another friend of his. I didn't agree to anything. Definitely a
subject I'll bring up on our walk, and pretty much the showstopper for
having him over.

Enter a new player, John. This guy is too good to be true, and I only
mention him here because it was the most normal, most relaxing, and most
hopeful chat I've had with any guy to date. I'm sure there is something
catastrophically wrong with him.

Sam: Another double date, this time with a couple of models from Canada.
I understand now what `preen' means. I don't even remember their
names, one was Terry something and the other was like Clive or some other
pretentious name. Both were total pricks from the word go. Sam's boy
Terry made sure we went to a club were he could be seen and appreciated.
Clive treats me like a charity case, and says maybe four words to me all
evening, which is OK by me because when he does talk (mostly to Terry)
it's about who's at the club and what they look like. Now Sam is a
master disher, but these guys are legitimately cruel and weird about it.
Even Sam was getting pissed. We ducked out to the bar and I wanted to
ditch our lovely but empty escorts, but Sam wanted to use them as bait.
I'm thinking that I've stooped to the level of the ugly chick, but by
then I was liquored up enough not to really care much. I was also horny
as hell, because despite being unbelievably nasty jerks, they were pretty
damned hot.

The thing is that Sam has been gay all his life and knows how to flirt. I
don't know how the hell to, and I feel pretty damned stupid doing it.
Again, the liquor helped, but by midnight Sam was dancing with this guy
that looked like a corporate tycoon, Terry, no TRISTAN, that was the
name, had actually picked up two women, and Clive was calling me a cab. I
am not cut out for this.


May 4, 19XX
Went for a long walk with Charlie, felt like we'd been doing this for
years. The conversation was both erotic and normal, which was OK by me.
I'd already decided not to ask him back to my place, and I kept my own
promise, although I did leave the door open for the future. I asked him
about this other guy and if he was serious, and he said that he was, but
not yet. Charlie knows I'm a `virgin' and doesn't want to push me
into something I'm not ready for. Seems that his buddy is also married,
and they occasionally play together with a willing guy, and play
separately. Honestly the idea has some appeal.

Saw Rico jogging in the park, I don't know if he saw me and Charlie.
Felt awkward as hell all of a sudden.
May 7, 19XX
Sam says he's found the love of his life and wants me to meet him. I'm
trying to figure out a way to duck out of this one. Backburner for now,
if he's really into this guy, he'll be around longer.

Rico did see me with Charlie and the subject came up yesterday during our
workout. He was pretty direct about it, asking me who the `old guy' was
that I was with. When I told him it was a friend, he snorted and shook
his head. I asked him what, at the same time realizing that I usually
avoid talking about my male to male experiences with Rico. He went off.
Said that if I was going to go to the other side to at least find a good
looking guy my age, and maybe get a taste of some pussy in there for
balance. He said it half-joking, I think. I wanted to drop the subject,
but he didn't. He asked me straight out what I'd tried so far, and I
felt really uncomfortable telling him, but I did. It's different talking
about it with Rico, I feel ashamed somehow.

John's another story altogether. We have the hottest chats that are the
most casual. He talks about sex the way you'd talk about a golf game.
He's not clinical or anything, just totally casual. It's so easy to
talk to him. He hasn't been with guys a long time, just in the past few
years, but he's a thinker. He's tried it all, and gave me some good
advice for what I haven't tried. He didn't do it in a lewd way, just
like you'd give advice to someone taking up golf. I really want to meet
him, but his schedule is a bitch.

May 10, 19XX
How the hell do I describe this? As it comes out I guess. Lost my
virginity unexpectedly. Very unexpectedly. I'm still freaked, elated,
confused, and fucked up.

Last night I met John at last, he is actually the way he described
himself, average guy on the tone side, hairy, good looking (blue eyes), a
little older than me, just enough. He is funny, articulate, and amazingly
comfortable in his skin. I know now that that one issue is wicked
important. We had a couple of beers, then he walked me home. I wanted to
invite him up, but he called a cab before I could. I felt like total
shit. I'd finally met a great guy, and he wasn't interested in me.
Wonderful.

I went into the lobby, and I see Rico's door closing as I get in. I
knock, just to be sure he's OK (he's been drinking a lot more than
usual lately, not as much as the bender, but enough to get buzzed every
night). He opens the door and he's pissed off, at me, no less. He's
mumbling something in Brazilian under his breath, and I get pissed. I'm
thinking that I just lost a golden opportunity with John, so I was pretty
primed to fight.

Rico congratulates me on John, telling me that at least I'm seeing guys
that are younger than my father, now I just needed to find one that
actually looked like a man and not some pussy whipped hubby. I told him
to mind his own fucking business, (talk about salt in the wound) and he
laughs. Now I'm really pissed. I start to leave, because if I stay I'm
gonna throw a punch. He gets between me and the door, and he's now
fucking scary. He's yelling at me half in Brazilian and half in English,
about wasting myself on dirty old men and losers. I'm getting ready to
deck the guy, but his words (at least the ones I understood) had a grain
of truth to them, and that took the wind out of my sails pretty fast. He
ranted about me being some gay boy-toy, and about Sam being a terrible
influence. I just stood there until he spent his anger.

When he was done, I just stood there. I didn't know what to say. It
wasn't any of his business who I chose to meet, or even have sex with.
But he was right in a lot of things. I didn't have any idea what I was
doing, why, or even what I was looking for. Sam had been my tour guide,
but to where? So I just stood there. A fucking reject from every angle.

I don't know how long I stood there, but my head was spinning. What
happened next was probably the last thing I expected. Rico reach over and
grabbed me by the shoulders, then put me in a crushing bear hug. I just
hung there. He smelled of booze and sweat, and he was sucking the air out
of me. He started apologizing, still not letting go. I reached up and
patted him on the back, partly to calm him down, and partly to ease up,
since I was feeling definitely dizzy. When he eased up I was so glad to
be able to breathe that when he locked his mouth on mine it caught me
completely off guard and I pulled back. He freaked out, I freaked at his
freak, and weirdness all around.  He started apologizing, ranting at
himself, throwing shit, then went into his bedroom and sat at the foot of
his bed and started crying.

What the hell do you do?? I walked in, knelt down, put my arms around him
and just hugged him. Whatever was eating him was doing a serious number
on him. He apologized again, and I said that it was my fault, that I was
surprised. We stared at each other then tried it again, and this time it
was a hell of a lot better. It was weird as hell, I mean we were friends,
but it just seemed like the right thing to do.

Rico broke it off, stood up, closed the door, and turned out the lights.
Again, weird. Next thing I know we're groping each other in the dark.
It's not like I don't know the guy's body, it's on display three or
four times a week in my apartment, but feeling it this way, with the heat
of the moment, and a LOT of unspent horniness, damn, it was incredible.
There was one neighborhood on his body, however, that I'd never seen,
and the darkness made it unbearably erotic to explore there.

I suspected from his bulge that Rico was no goliath in the dick
department. What I didn't know was that he was uncut, and further that
uncut seems to have a propensity to show small when not angered. When I
mustered the courage to go south, my fingertips encountered first a root
of sizable proportions. It was as hard as the rest of him. My hand
wandered up the shaft, amazed at how he'd kept this thing in his shorts
when we worked out. Not having a ruler, I counted a full eight finger
widths from the base to the edge of the crown, or the bump that I assumed
was the crown. The foreskin was all over the place, like a second pair of
underwear.

I didn't have long to explore there, this was his apartment and he knew
where everything was even in the dark, but I didn't, so when he turned
me, I went flailing backwards onto the bed. So did he. This wasn't the
hungry horny stuff like Paul, and it certainly wasn't the brutality of
Anthony, this was a new thing, and my thinking brain was trying to figure
it out. The rest of my brain was telling the thinking brain to shut the
hell up and enjoy it. Rico was familiar and novel at the same time,
unbelievably erotic and urgent. The darkness made it seem like a stolen
moment. We wrestled around in the bed, exerting more energy and muscle
strength that you'd think was sexual. If either one of us had been
female, there would have been broken bones.

Part of me knew where we were going, or at least wanted to go. A small
part protested, not like this, not here, not now, not with him, but the
louder part kept asking why not. The mini-argument went back and forth,
but Rico's touch was electrifying, silencing both sides. My last thought
was that it was going to complicate things. Against all good judgment,
when I felt him positioning himself, I reciprocated. I felt vulnerable,
actually opening my legs like that, but the truth is that I wanted him.
His mouth roamed my chest (which is fair since he helped sculpt it) and
found my neck. My hands went up and down his torso, so familiar, but
never like this. When his cockhead touched my ass, I gasped. He paused,
found my lips in the darkness, and began a long passionate kiss as he
entered me.

Nobody told me it burned, nobody told me it hurt like hell, and nobody
told me that once it starts, there's no practical way of stopping a
two-hundred pound guy from taking your ass.  At first it was ok, it felt
pretty damned good. The sensation was actually enough to make me roll my
eyes back. I couldn't believe it was happening. Then the burning
started. He was going very slowly, but just the physics involved I guess.
The head of his tool surged it, felt like it was sliding past the
foreskin and it opened me up fast. That hurt.
It didn't hurt him, he grunted with pleasure and deepened the kiss. I
wanted him to pull out, let me get some lube, or something to make it
seat right, it felt like my ass was caving in on itself, like he was
pushing my cheeks into my hole. He kept up the pressure and I felt it all
the way up to my navel, a dull ache. I realized that I was actually
clenching my ass tight, fighting the entry.

I took a deep breath and relaxed, and I actually grabbed my ass and
pulled my cheeks apart. Now a big chunk of cock dove in as my ass snapped
up, and it hurt like hell. Tears welled up in my eyes, but in the dark he
couldn't see it. I wasn't going to whine or whimper either. I finally
felt his thighs against mine, and I knew he was all the way in. I sighed.
Behind the searing pain and discomfort, there was a huge pleasure
waiting. He held it there, not moving, and my ass relaxed around him. I
didn't want to think of that thick, long meat buried inside me, only
that I had finally gotten what I wanted.

My hands went from my ass to his, kneading his firm globes as his
wriggled his hips a little. This seated him even deeper, and I moaned, it
was starting to get good. Inside it hurt, like he was hitting something
hard, but the overall feeling of him was amazing. I felt like a complete
klutz, so freaked that this was happening that I didn't move, I just lay
there, feeling his chest on me, his mouth on mine. Sensory overload. He
started to pull out, and all I could think of was no, don't go! I
grabbed his ass for all I was worth, and he pushed back in. He started to
pump slowly, each time going out a little further, making all sorts of
sounds in his throat. I remembered my first time fucking a guy, and how
totally different it was, and I could appreciate what he was feeling.

He pulled off the kiss and rose up on his arms. I shifted my ass to get a
better angle. I was suddenly glad it was dark, because I was in a totally
submissive position. I'd always fantasized about this, but actually
doing it, particularly with a guy I liked and respected, felt weird. He
pumped hard, and at the base of each stroke that sharp stab rang up my
belly. I didn't really care at that point, I wanted to get him off. I
rubbed his chest, played with his hairy nipples, and tried to squeeze my
ass at the right time, although I failed most of the time. He picked up
the pace, and I knew he was almost there. He gave out a big grunt and
pulled out so fast I felt like I'd been emptied. I felt the cum shoot on
the bed and on my ass. His body was vibrating, literally shaking the bed.
I held on to his shoulders, a little miffed that the fun was done and
I'd missed it.

He slumped onto the bed beside me, and reached over and grabbed my cock.
He only stroked it a couple of times before I shot, who knows how far. I
know some of it landed on my chest. He withdrew his hand and lay there
next to me. Now was the moment of truth, and I had no idea what to do
next. I wanted to get the hell out of there, into a shower, and I didn't
even want to think that I'd just had unprotected sex. After a few
minutes he started snoring, so I got up quietly, found most of my
clothes, and snuck out.

I haven't seen him today, so I have no idea what's next. I know that
last night was the most erotic experience I've ever had, and now I'm
afraid I'll never match it. Rico's straight, I caught him at a bad
time, for both of us. I'll be lucky if he's still my friend.

May 9, 19XX
Charlie called today, but I put him off. Same with John. Sam wants to
know what's up with me, and I haven't seen Rico since the thing the
other night. I'm feeling weird all over, like maybe I've made a huge
mistake here.