Date: Sat, 29 Apr 2006 00:14:26 -0600
From: Dream Spinner <authorsix@hotmail.com>
Subject: ST: "Jason's Journey - Chapter 11" (bi, true, m/f, m/b)
This is a story about the growing up and coming of age of a typical Ohio
boy by the name of Jason as told to me through the exchange of a series of
Email. It is a true story detailing true events with only the names,
including Jason's, having been changed to protect the travelers we meet
along the way. We pick up where we left off in Chapter 10 with
twenty-four-year-old Jason recovering from his second major surgery and
returning to college and discovering the twists and turns of use and abuse.
The lyrics to "You Go First" are copyright of Jessica Andrews, and the
lyrics to "Scars" are copyright of Papa Roach. Comments about the story
can be sent to the author, J.O. Dickingson at authorsix@hotmail.com and
those who wish to correspond directly with Jason may do so at
journeyofjason@yahoo.com
CHAPTER ELEVEN: UP AND DOWN THE ROLLER COASTER WITH NICOLE
I return to college for the spring semester and am in another class
with Chad. Unfortunately the class is on a Saturday at ten a.m. Needless
to say, I drop the class after the fourth week. I am just not a Saturday
morning school type person and the prospects of getting it on with Chad
aren't strong enough to keep me going. I haven't seen him since. It is
funny that over the years the only reason I went to some classes, even in
high school, was to see people. Toward the end of my last semester in high
school the only reason I went to school actually was to check out the guys
in the shower.
In May Alisa and I go to a bar in Canton because I want to sign up for
a Q92 card. They are selling tickets to the Hanson concert that is in
Canton, but you have to have a card to get the pre-sale tickets. On the
ride up, Alisa and I are talking about Jess and her sister. Alisa mentions
that she was talking with their mother and their mother told her that Jess
thought she was a lesbian. I almost go catatonic. I can't talk for like
five minutes and my mind is just totally blown. When I finally start
coming out of it, the first thing I say is, "wouldn't that be so hot, to
see Jess and her sister together." Alisa hits me and says that is gross.
I would still have sex with Jess if the opportunity ever arose, but
that probably won't happen if she really is a lesbian. At least I know it
wasn't me that she didn't like, just my dick, LOL. That night, I get good
and drunk. I love Long Island Ice Tea and have a few at the bar, along
with a shot of something, and another drink that is supposed to be a Long
Island, but it has a lemon, a lime, and a cherry in it. I have never had a
Long Island with that combination of fruit, so I have no idea what I am
drinking, but it fucks me up good. As we are sitting there, I motion Alisa
to lean across the table so I can lean in to talk to her privately. The
music is so loud I could have yelled it from the table and nobody would
have heard me anyway. I lean in and say, "I'm really drunk, but you do
know I'm bi right?" She just looks at me with this deer caught in the
headlights look, you know, like George Bush always has.
I am so drunk I fall out of the car trying to get in it and Alisa
drives it home that night. I just sit in the passenger seat and keep
talking about being bi and how many guys I have been with. Funny thing,
she used to date Kenny before he openly came out. We always used to say
that guys Alisa dates are either gay or named Jason . Not anymore.
So that May I see Hanson in person in Cleveland and then in June in
Canton, thinking back to when I'd first seen them and thought they were
three girls. As I'm standing there watching I'm wishing Tay would see me
and invite me back stage. The concerts are unbelievably loud. Five
thousand screaming 12-18 year-old-girls and me. Ninety-five percent of
them would lay down and spread 'em for any one of them and as I'm watching
I realize I would too. The concert in Canton is inside and even louder.
Poor Zac has to pull his monitor out of his ear because of the feedback.
Fine-looking pieces of ass, all three of them.
I have some hot jerk off sessions afterward imagining me with each of
them, and with all three together, in every possible combination.
In June, Nicole and I go down to Columbus to a Dell store because they
have a great deal on a 2400, 60GB hard drive, 512 MB RAM, CD burners,
four-year warranty, and all-in-one printer for under $700. It is a hell of
a deal, a twentieth anniversary sale, so we go down to order one for her.
We leave early in the morning and have a good day walking around the mall
and getting dinner at the Olive Garden. I cannot believe the size of the
mall. Two stories and I don't know how many blocks. When we first entered
I just stood there at the door slack-jawed and my head craning left and
right like some country boy. Columbus is about a three-hour drive from my
town. On the way home I am listening to a Garth Brooks CD while she sleeps
and the song "The Dance" comes on. I look over at her while she sleeps and
I feel myself start falling in love with her. I push it out of my mind but
the thought keeps returning. She and her husband have been talking about a
divorce since late 2003 so the possibility of the two of us getting
together is not totally out of the question.
She gets her computer a week later and I go over and hook it up for
her and get her up and running with the Internet and burning CDs. I take
my country CDs up so she can go through them and burn the ones she wants
and I also take my laptop up so we can burn them twice as fast. That night
we sit around listening to CDs after putting her daughter to bed and I show
her some of the stuff I have on my laptop. We eventually shut my computer
down and just sit on the love seat talking. She is kind of leaning in, in
what looks like the start of a kiss, but then it has been so long since I
have been kissed, I figure I could be wrong. She tells me that she has
always liked me and that she put her feelings aside for Alisa and Tara and
all the other crushes and relationships I have had. I can't believe it.
It is like she'd sensed my feelings for her on the ride back from Columbus.
The mood suddenly changes. There is so much sexual tension between us you
would have to be dead not to feel it. We are looking into each others eyes
and a song suddenly comes to mind. I jump up and grab the Jessica Andrews
disc that has the song "You Go First."
You're kicking tires, I'm sitting on the fence
Love's falling all around us and it don't make sense
How long can the two of us beat around the bush
We're right out on the edge but we need a little push
Dancing on the tightrope, wearing it thin
Instead of closing our eyes and jumping in
(chorus)
Do you want to kiss
Do you want to kiss
Do you want to kiss
You go first
You're dodging the moon and I'm playing it safe
Look what we're not doing, oh boy, what a waste
And what could be worse than never saying it at all
Is never knowing the feeling, never feeling the fall
What's it gonna take to get us both there
Can't you see what I'm suggesting, it's a double dare
(repeat chorus)
You start if you have the nerve
I'll trust my heart, but you go first
I shut the radio off and turn to look at her. She is laughing a
little and I just repeat, "You go first." She leans in and we kiss, a very
hard and passionate kiss. She hasn't learned anything in the past eleven
years since our first kiss in the alley outside my house:
lot of tongue, which I am still not too crazy about. We wind up on the
floor in her living room, kissing and grinding. She pulls my dick out and
begins to give me a blow job. I could have boned her if I wanted to, but
for some reason I stop and tell her that we can't do this since she is
still married. She agrees and we stop, about three hours after we had
started kissing. It really messes up my mind and I don't know what to
think of it all. I want her, I want her badly, and she wants me, but it
isn't right.
The next day we are going to go to Canton for some shopping. We never
make it and while her daughter is down for a nap, we are all over each
other. Again, she has me out and begins to give me a blow job. I never
got off the first time, and I don't this time either.
I really fall for Nicole after those first two encounters and start
imagining the rest of my life with her. I know I would have to be there
for her and her little girl.
Her little girl is only eighteen months old and I haven't really paid
much attention to her until now, other than when I had to. She always
seemed to take to me whenever I was there though. After our little make
out sessions, I start playing with her and carrying her around and I start
to fall in love with her little girl too and in no time I just can't
imagine my life without them.
About two weeks after we started making out, we wind up going all the
way. She had been begging me to go all the way since that first night and
I had been kicking myself in the ass that I had turned her down. I finally
decided if I got another chance, I would go for it. That night, we are
playing Super Mario Kart on the SNES and I beat her every round. We stop
and start making out and we take our clothes off. I start rubbing my dick
between her legs and she looks at me and again almost begs me to do it. I
reposition myself and slid in. I have never had any problems positioning
myself with a girl, never having had to use my hands, just feeling my way
through and never missing.
Her eyes about shoot out of her head when she feels me pushing in. I
bury myself and wait a minute for her to adjust. She says it is hurting so
I pull out and hold her for a few minutes. I ask her if she wants to go to
her bed so we can be more comfortable. We change rooms and she gets me a
condom and we go at it for five hours. I never do cum, but she does many
times. It doesn't matter to me that I don't shoot one off. I am making
the person I love happy and that makes me happy. That is all I think about
for those five hours.
The next day, it takes me about forty-five minutes to jack off. It is
very frustrating. I don't know what the problem is, but figure it is
probably some mental thing with her being married and all. I leave her
place around seven in the morning because I have a dentist appointment.
Mom is starting to get suspicious as to what is going on and we begin
to fight about it. Nicole and I have to be very secretive about this whole
thing since she is going through with the divorce and she would have child
custody problems if her husband found out about me. A few weeks later, we
both need to just get out of the area so we take a drive, to Maryland. We
get to Halfway Maryland, eat dinner and come home. It takes us probably
twelve hours total. We have her little girl with us and she is an angel
for the whole trip. It is that time of the month for Nicole and she is
having very bad cramps for the whole trip. We get home somewhere around
three a.m. and after we put her girl in her crib, we start making out.
Nicole had said that sex is supposed to stop the cramps so I figure, what
the hell. I mean what do I know about that, and besides, I'm willing to do
anything Nicole asks. We do it for another four or five hours, again
without me cumming and with her having an orgasm many times over.
I have never been with a girl while on her period before. Well, shock
does not begin to describe my reaction the next day when I see how much
blood is on me. Holy shit, it looks like somebody killed a pig that rolled
around in a blood bank! I still cannot get over how much blood there was.
Honestly, I think the Red Cross keeps less blood than that on hand at
disaster sites. I will tell you one thing, after seeing that, I don't
trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die. Despite my
shock, I feel good that I could help her though. So I clean up the best I
can and then go home and shower a few dozen times.
Nicole says that she is going to go to visit a friend's mother that
night and won't be home for a few days. It is nothing but a lie. She goes
to Virginia so her husband can see their daughter. That is the first in a
long line of lies. I know what she is doing right from the beginning, but
I feel sorry for her and I imagine how she must be feeling about the
upcoming divorce hearing what with her daughter and all and I just let her
go with it. She calls me on the way home and tells me where she had been
and I just tell her I know. I tell her I am upset that she lied and that
all I ever want is for her to tell me the truth. She says she is sorry and
that she will. Another lie.
I start to fill in as somewhat of a father figure for Nicole, and I
wind up spending more time with her daughter then she does. We watch TV a
lot. I know every episode of Dora the Whorea (okay, Dora the Explorer
after a few hundred times that little Spanish girl can be a bit annoying),
Sesame Street, Barney, and Oobi. (My God that is a stupid show, hand
puppets without puppets, just hands talking back and forth). We watch
pretty much everything on Nickelodeon, Noggin, and Disney. I don't know
how many times I have watched "Finding Nemo."
I continue to have the pains in my side from the surgery and it is
decided that I should see the pain clinic in late July. The doctor gives
me some drugs and tells me to go to physical therapy. There they decide to
put me in the pool so I won't strain myself too badly. At this point, it
has been almost three years since I have been in a pool and after the
surgeries I have developed a real fear of water for some reason. I almost
freak out thinking about having to get in the pool. I have a week to worry
about it and Nicole is very reassuring and tells me to come up to her house
after my first round of therapy and we will have a little fun. I make it
into the water after a lot of hesitation, but I keep thinking about what is
going to happen that afternoon.
Nicole works midnights so she is in bed when I get there but she told
me before to let myself in and come to her room. I walk in and lay down
with her and just hold her the rest of the day until she has to get up. It
is such a nice afternoon. We don't do anything sexual that day, though she
does try when she wakes up, but we just don't have enough time.
Throughout that summer, Nicole and I kiss and make out as often as we
can. I am happy that we are together, but I am miserable because I have to
keep everything a secret. I should have been the happiest I have ever been
because I am with her, the person I truly and fully love. Instead I start
going back into a depression and start crying almost every week because of
it. Nicole and I would talk about the future and how we would be together.
Then we would talk and she would say she is staying with her husband. I
never know what is going on. I break down a few times in front of her and
each time she keeps away from me for a week to give me time to collect
myself. It is a horrible summer and through it all Mom and I argue about
what is going on.
In August Nicole decides to move to an apartment at the north end of
town. This is right after one of my break downs and she calls me a few
days later and tells me she is moving. This is the same day that George
W. came through town. It is probably best that I stayed home that day. I
may have wound up in a federal prison for egging his bus or something like
that. The only reason Nicole really calls me to let me know is because she
needs help moving. The house she is in belonged to her grandmother, who
died a few months before Nicole moved back here. Her uncle is in charge of
the house and said he would let her out of her contract that ran for
another month as long as she was out by the last day of August so he could
show it. Again, I am there for her through the entire move, helping pack
up, clean, move her stuff, everything. I am still suffering from my
surgery because the nerves haven't healed properly. I wear myself out
helping her get everything moved in just under two weeks and just as the
pain was starting to subside, I aggravate it and am in constant pain again.
She doesn't have everything out on Sunday, so when she goes to work, I get
the key from her mom and go back to her house, clear everything out, sweep
the floors, finish cleaning the walls, and get her out in time.
I'd quit smoking after my surgery, but I start again when I go to
Virginia with Nicole in September for a court appearance for a speeding
ticket, and then to North Carolina to visit her aunt. Her husband comes up
from one of the Navy bases to see their daughter. I really hate the guy
for the way he is treating the woman I love more than anything in the
world. Later that month, the day Chiang is to leave Virginia to come up
here for their divorce hearing, he gets word that he is going to get his
citizenship so he gets his papers before coming up here. Up until that
day, he has been telling Nicole how much he still loves her and doesn't
want the divorce and wants to try and work things out. Well, when he gets
here, he tells her that they could never work things out and he wants to go
on with the divorce. I love it because I had told her from the very
beginning all he wanted was his citizenship and she had said unequivocally
that he really loved her. It is just too coincidental that the day he gets
his papers is the day he decides to go through with the divorce.
Since my business program was getting into the higher math
requirements again, I switch into computers that fall and I meet Gary, a
post secondary high school student in my geology class. A post secondary
high school student is one who takes college classes during high school and
can have an associate degree by the time he graduates from high school. I
really wish I had done that. Gary is my typical dorky-looking crush. He
is sixteen, about 5'7", with shaggy brown hair and a nose like I have never
seen. It isn't big, but it is very ethnic looking, Jewish I think. He and
I would make fun of people in the class together. I have a real history of
making fun of people, not that I am a real looker. Gary and I also sit
next to each other in the lab and always work together. He is another one
that I thought I might have a chance with because of the way he acts. I
usually have a very good gaydar. I knew my cousin was a lesbian twenty
years before she did. So I ask Gary to go to Cedar Point, but we never go
and nothing materializes between us, though he does give me fresh jerk off
material.
The Chicken Hawk from Shell stills tries to get in contact with me now
and then. I see him at the September county fair while I am walking around
with Nicole and her daughter. He is a real drama queen, very overly
expressive with everything he does. He stops dead in his tracks, turns
around and watches me walk past with this look on his face. He probably
thought that I was with my wife and daughter. I really ham it up too as I
walk past by picking up Nicole's little girl and kissing her and carrying
her and laughing with Nicole and acting like a family. I want him to see
what he could never have, and with the matter settled between Chiang and
Nicole, what I am hoping to have.
The first time we do have sex in Nicole's new apartment is the last
time. We had just finished getting everything set and unpacked and we were
lying on the couch watching a movie. We start kissing and one thing leads
to another and we wind up in her bedroom. This time it lasts about three
hours. Right after, she gets up and takes a shower. When she comes back,
we lay talking for a while and right out of the blue she says that she
isn't interested in having a relationship with me. That about kills me and
I'm so in shock and so hurt I don't say anything. A few days later, she
says something to me about cutting me off from sex. I almost have to laugh
because she is the only one getting any real pleasure from it.
It is right around this time that I start cutting. I'd first heard
about cutting on the 2000 Lifetime channel movie "Secret Cutting" about a
girl who cuts to help with the pain of life. There were episodes about it
on "Seventh Heaven" and "Degrassi" also, and there was an outbreak at our
school. I never understood how people could get to that point of
depression and pain that they would injure themselves. Well, I found out.
I am in a lot of pain and not really in my right mind set and one day I'm
thinking about those shows and I just decide to try it. That's me, try
anything once. The pain gives me a rush, a rush I need to get through the
pain of seeing Nicole every day and not being able to do anything with
her. So, I do it again, and again, and again. I use anything I can find, a
knife, a pop can tab, fingernail clippers. Just a small cut now and then,
nothing too deep, but eventually I run out of room on my shoulders to cut.
I only do it for that week and then stop as suddenly as I'd begun. It
really helps me grow as a person though, and now I understand what these
kids who cut themselves seriously are going through. I have done a lot of
research on the subject and I think I have a unique insight on the topic.
One of the physiotherapists suggests I go out and walk or ride my bike
a few times a week. So I take her advice and get the bike down from the
rafters in the garage and go out a few times a week, riding about five
miles up to the park and home. Eric comes over a few times and he goes out
with me. I stick to my normal five mile route and we stop at the park to
get a drink and then continue home. Eric has really been growing lately.
He has always looked like a little pixie or fairy or something like that.
Now, at the age of twelve, he is about 5'9", 160 pounds, pretty solid and
strong, with dark brown hair and glasses, though he usually wears contacts.
He has a birth mark, just a dark spot, on his lower stomach just below
where his pants stop. He is strong, but I am always able to get the upper
hand on him when we wrestle, which drives him crazy. I think he is
stronger then me, but I am very agile and can get out of any move he puts
on me.
The first night, when we get home, I am left to watch him because mom
and dad have gone to a store. While we are sitting in the living room, I
think watching my Freddy vs. Jason DVD which has a scene in which the woman
is topless, I mention to him that if he has any questions about growing up,
girls, sex, anything that he may be too embarrassed to ask his parents
about, he can ask me and I won't make fun of him or tell his parents if he
doesn't want me too. When the movie is over, he starts asking me if I have
a porno collection. I tell him that I don't have any, but he doesn't
believe me and keeps probing. I finally tell him that I have tapes and
magazines, but they are guarded under a lock and key, which they are, and
he isn't going to get to them.
Well, he goes into my room and starts looking around and figures out
which chesser they are in and keeps asking me to get them out. I tell him
no and that he is too young and I am not going to be responsible for the
corruption of a minor. Personally, I don't care, which I guess is no
surprise considering my history. I think it is a very stupid law. Anyway,
he says "fine, you probably only have gay movies anyway." Little does he
know how close he is!
When he goes back into the living room, I open the case and move the gay
tapes to my other chesser. When he returns, I tell him he can look at the
magazines, but that is all. He starts flipping through them and then
starts looking at some of the movie covers. He asks if I would put one in,
and after a bit of persuading, I finally agree to play one for one minute,
and that is all. The minute is up and he says it was pretty boring and
showed too much dick and not enough pussy and tits.
A few weeks later, he comes to spend the night again. When my parents
go to bed, he comes into my room and asks if he can see another movie. I
say sure and open the chesser and let him pick a movie. I have to go into
the living room to put the movie in because I only have one VCR and it is
connected to the TV in the living room. I have a splitter that leads into
my room and both TVs can play the same thing, whether it is cable or tape.
I have a powermid in my room that transmits the remote control into another
room, so I can just point my remote at the TV and it will work. I sit in
my computer chair while he sits on my bed watching the TV. I make mention
that if he wants to "let off some steam" as I motion the universal sign for
jacking off, to feel welcome to go ahead. He says no and after changing
the tape a few times, he gets bored and goes to bed and I do the same.
Another few weeks go by and he comes to spend the night again. This
is at the time when my Compaq computer dies and I move to using my laptop.
It is sitting at the foot of my bed on a small table and all I have to do
is adjust my head and I can lay in bed and be on the computer. I always
sleep with my head at what would normally be the foot of the bed because it
is pointed toward the south and I sleep much better with my head pointing
south, always have. I've also noticed I seem to have more out of body
experiences with my head pointing south. Several times I have "bumped"
into the ceiling. The last time it happened, I was able to make it out to
the kitchen and interact with Buster, one of our dogs. I asked Mom about
it later and she said that he had been acting weird right around the same
time it would have been happening. I have only been able to control it a
few times, but it is pretty cool. I am trying to get myself focused so I
can control when these happen and where I go.
Anyway, that night, he is telling me about all the sex he is
supposedly having with girls at school. I know most if not all of what he
tells me is probably totally made up, but I just let him talk and let him
know that I am here for him to confide in. We have always had a brotherly
type of relationship. I ask if he is at least using condoms or something
to prevent pregnancy and disease. He says that he does sometimes and he
doesn't other times. I tell him that he should always use a condom and ask
if he has any. He says no and I tell him that I have some that he can have
if they fit him, if he wants them. Around 11:30, my dad starts his bath,
mom is up in bed, and Eric and I are surfing the news groups for porn. He
goes out to check on what dad is doing and grab a pop and when he comes
back in, he asks me for the condom so he can try it on. I hand it to him
and he starts going out into the living room. I ask what he is doing and
he says he is going out to try it on. I persuade him to try it on in my
room since my door has a lock on it. He agrees that this is a much better
idea and comes back into my room. He sits at the foot of my bed and starts
undoing his pants. He pulls his dick out and he is half hard. It is a
pretty good sized dick for a twelve-year-old. I'm surprised to see he has
no hairs. He tries to put the condom on and it wouldn't go. He sets it
down and starts stroking to get himself all the way hard.
By this time I am about busting my pants open I am so hard. He is
still having problems so I ask if he wants me to show him how it is done.
He says no and that he can do it. He tries a few more times and still
can't get it so I finally grab another condom, take my dick out, and show
him how to check which side rolls and how to roll it down over the dick.
He finally gets it, but it is too big for him.
We sit and start watching another movie. He has put his dick away and
so have I, but I want to jack off with him, or at least in front of him. I
ask him if he is circumcised, knowing full well that he is and that he
would probably not know what that means. I start to explain it to him and
then finally say to just pull his pants down and I would show him. I point
out where the circumcision scar is and tell him that he is cut like me. I
also mention about his smooth pubes, and he explains that some of the guys
in his class had dared him to shave them, and he had. He of course asks
about mine, and I explain that I'd been shaving myself for a while, because
I liked how it felt. I tell him that I am really horny and have to get off
and ask if he minds me doing it with him there. He says to go ahead so I
pull it out, slip on the condom, and go for it. After a bit I'm not
getting anywhere so I take off the condom and do it raw.
About ten minutes later, I am still going at it and he asks if I am
almost done. I tell him that it is weird being the only one out and
stroking and he asks if I want him to join me. I say it is up to him. He
gets up and goes to the bathroom and when he gets back, he gets into his
position at the corner of my bed and pulls his dick out and starts jerking
with me. I love the sight of it and cream in the towel I brought into the
room with me within five minutes. He keeps going for a while, but stops a
few minutes later because his arm is tired and he isn't feeling anything.
When he leaves my room, I pull out and go for it again, this time using the
condom that he used on his dick. The idea of his dick having been where
mine is now has me shooting a second time and just as powerfully.
The next day, he is in my room looking at some porn on the computer
and playing one of my Gamecube games. He mentions that he is going to go
out for a bike ride and I tell him that if he waits I would come with him,
but I need to get off again, hoping he would join in again. To my
disappointment he says to hurry up and he will be outside. I stroke off a
pretty fast load and then go out on a bike ride with him.
In mid-October Nicole's friend dies. I am there for her every single
day, holding her while she cries, and I watch her daughter while she goes
to Texas for the funeral. When she returns, she starts talking about this
doctor that she works with that wants to take her out and she is so
interested in him. Then she meets a guy that lives in her apartment
complex and they hit it off really well watching movies and whatnot. I can
tell she is really interested in him too. I find out that they were
kissing the one night and he gave her a hickey, and that she didn't want me
to come around for a week until it went away. I bring up her interest in
these guys and why she figures things can't work between us, but she will
not admit that she has any sexual interest in them and she starts making up
blatantly ridiculous excuses about us.
In November, she starts talking to an old college friend who is
married to another one of Nicole's friends. They are having problems too
and have been going through a divorce for quite some time. In December, he
and Nicole become an official couple even though he is still married. Her
friend is ok with their arrangement at first but then she gets pissed about
it and tells Nicole where to go.
I finally start realizing Nicole and I wouldn't be getting together
and I get totally smashed on Southern Comfort, close to an entire fifth.
She calls me that night on her lunch break and I just tear into her telling
her how much I love her and how much I hate her for what she is doing to
me. I tell her I'm not going to let her do it to me anymore. I cut two
times that night, once on each arm, rather deeply. Those are the only two
that scar and I now have the memory of that night every time I look at my
shoulders.
I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut
My weakness is that I care too much
And our scars remind us that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel.
The next time Eric spends the night, his stepbrother comes too, the
second youngest of my new sister-in-law's kids by her former husband. The
boy is around seven, blond hair, very thin. I go in the house before my
mom and the kids when we come back from dinner and run to the bathroom to
pee. As soon as I flush the toilet the boy is knocking on the door saying
that he had to really go too. I tell him I have to wash my hands but he
can come in if he wants to, which he does, really having to go. We have a
good sized mirror on the wall above the sink and while I'm washing my hands
I look in the mirror and check him out. It is average for that age I
guess, small but cute.
I had gotten a few new games from a store right next to the restaurant
we had eaten at, two wrestling games and BMX-XXX. That game has a lot of
nudity in it if you can unlock the right menus. The young boy is sitting
and playing with us and Eric tells him that he better not tell anyone or he
would regret it. After watching a few of the videos, Eric says to the
little guy that there is a lot more he can see and he starts to open my
laptop. I tell him no, definitely not, and to wait until his stepbrother
goes to bed and then we can watch and do whatever he wants.
The boy goes to bed and Eric goes to my chesser and then to my laptop.
I get us two towels and we both take our dicks out and start stroking.
Again, I come and he doesn't. I am not sure why he can't. I would love to
see him shoot.
The next time Eric spends the night is after I get my new desktop so
it is late December and it is just he and I again. He goes right to my
computer and starts looking at and downloading porn. He says he wants to
watch one of the movies and I open the case for him and let him pick one
out. I had gotten a VCR/DVD player for Christmas and it is in my room, so
we don't have to go out to change tapes. The sheets weren't on my bed at
the time and Eric says he is horny and needs to get off. I tell him to
help me get the sheets on, and then he can do whatever he wants. It is a
pain in the ass getting the sheets on and seems doubly troublesome with my
anticipation of watching him jacking his young dick off and shooting off a
load. I tell him that I am going to do it too and he sits in the spot I
normally sit so I have to get in the corner where he normally sits. That
is fine by me because I can easily watch him jerking and watch the tape at
the same time.
He challenges me to a contest to see who can shoot first. I beat him
and he continues for a bit more but can't shoot. While I'd been doing it
I'd licked the pre-cum from my fingers, and after I shoot in the towel, I
lick the bit of cum left on my jerking hand off while he continues jerking.
He says that is gross, but I can tell he is interested in what it is like
and I'm sure he's tried it in private since then. We go outside
afterwards, around two a.m., so I can have a cigarette and while we are
standing there he says he has to piss. I tell him to go in and piss but he
just whips it out and pisses on the bush outside our back door. I am a
little surprised he does that with us living right in town, but it is so
late he probably figured no one would know.
One day I am in Canton with Mom and we go into a pet store. She buys
two Emerald Swifts, ugly little lizard things. While I am waiting for her,
I look in some of the other cages and I see three Ball Pythons on sale for
$35 a piece, normally $50. One comes right to the front of the cage when
it sees me and just will not settle down. I tell Mom and she says she is
not having a snake in her house. Well, we go back a few days later and the
same thing happens, the snake coming right up to the front and not settling
down until I walk away. I start thinking about it and really start pushing
Mom into letting me get it. This is right when I started watching Buffy
the Vampire Slayer on television, so I start calling the snake Willow after
Alyson Hannigan's character.
We go back toward the end of the month and Mom finally gives in. A
woman had just bought one of them so there were two left, Willow and
another one that clung to her. Mom tries everything she can to get me to
forget about them. First she says if I could find a twenty-gallon tank
that I could get Willow. She doesn't think we had one, but I find one in
the garage. Then she says that I couldn't just get Willow and leave the
other one all alone, I guess thinking that I wouldn't want to spend the
money or take care of two snakes. Actually I have never liked snakes and
never figured I would have one. I didn't think I would be able to feed
them a poor little mouse every week.
Well, I say sure, it would be nice for Willow to have a friend. So we
go and pick them up that night and they have been sitting next to me at the
computer ever since.
I name the other one Tara, after Willow's lesbian witch lover on Buffy.
Willow is the nicest snake you would ever want to meet. She climbs up my
sleeves, goes up my face and sits in my hair. She just loves to be on me.
Tara on the other hand is a bit of a bitch and a little slow in the head.
She tries to bite me every chance she gets and has drawn blood several
times. Nothing serious. She has a real problem catching her mice too. I
put Willow and Tara in separate cages to feed them to make sure each one
gets food and Tara runs her head into the side about six times before she
connects.
The arrival of Willow and Tara means a bit of rearranging of my room.
Like I've already mentioned, when I started working at Spencer's I started
getting posters, the Lava lamps, the glowing electro balls, different
lights and fountains, and all sorts of shit. One of my favorite posters is
a LED print Dogs Playing Pool with about six dogs that look like bulldogs
around a pool table watching one getting ready for a shot. The lights
above the table have LEDs in them and I think the table has a few also. I
love the look of the LED prints and they give a nice soft light with the
main room lights off. I know there is a ton of those dog pictures and I'd
like to get every one of them. Two other LED prints I have are a black and
white picture of the Twin Towers as seen from under the Brooklyn Bridge,
and the Lighthouse. I have a neon pink clock, a few black light posters (a
dragon, a frog playing a recorder, and a mouse, frog, and some snakes
smoking from a bong), and I also have a print of Van Gogh's Starry Night,
one of Monet's Water Lily's and of course, the squirrel with the big nuts
hanging down with "Hello Ladies!" written under it. Again, I have to have
a few tacky things, kind of like my pink flamingo collection. I love
flamingos and I buy everything I can with flamingos on it, like a neon yard
flamingo, flamingo rice paper lamps, towels, figurines, bath sponges,
anything I can. Mom won't let me put them in the yard though. The shelves
I made myself and that Dad and I put up have 800+ Beanie Babies, stuffed
animals, and 14 feet of drinking glasses, flasks, shot glasses, shakers,
tumblers, and anything else to do with alcohol. On top of that are my CDs
and DVDs. If it sounds like a mess, you're right. My rooms have always
been messy.
The only place we could bring up the cable for my Internet is by the
side window. I wish my bed were in front of the window. I used to love
watching the kids across the street when I was upstairs. I have moved the
chessers, which I used to keep my cigarettes in but which I now use to
store my porn, one next to the bed so Kookie can get up by herself (it is a
very tall bed and she is a very short and plump dog) and the other is in
front of the rack in front of the window. I have boxes of magazines and
school books, a few spare blankets, and of course my babies, my two snakes.
I move them into a fifty-gallon tank a few weeks after I got them and have
it set up all nice for them with a tunnel and a log they can crawl on.
They didn't like the way I had it set up initially and kept me up most of
the night tearing things up and rearranging. The worst part is sleeping
bathed in a bright red heat light that I have to keep on them.
I am now trying to talk Mom into letting me get a Columbian Red Tail
Boa, but she is standing firm against it. I found a place where I could
mail order one and get it the next day. I figure there is nothing she can
do if it winds up on our doorstep some day. I also want to go through the
training and become certified for venomous snakes some day. Well, next
year is another year!