Date: Mon, 9 Jul 2001 10:11:51 -0400 (EDT)
From: maxwelllite@webtv.net
Subject: Lee & Me, Chapter 12

I couldn't sleep at all for the rest of the night.  It wasn't just that I
was on a thin blanket on a hard floor either...although that played no
small part.

It was mainly my thoughts of where I was, and how I had arrived here, and
what I had become, and especially how Carter had used me, and the situation
that said he could continue that use for as long as it pleased him to do
so.

It was like some sort of bizarre dream from which I would soon
awaken. Surely I could not really be here on the floor at the foot of my
former enemy's bed after having been used by him in the most humiliating of
ways...could I?

But the reality was, "Yes," and as I searched my mind for an explanation
for how I had arrived at this point in my life, just one word always came
to mind..."Lee"

"Lee."  That name had become the focal point of my very existence.  Lee,
who, from the moment I met him, had slowly taken control of my life until
it had accelerated into his total and absolute control.  Lee, who for
whatever reason, projected to me an incredible superiority that made me
want to crawl, grovel at his feet, and surrender all, and even, if it were
possible, become his legally owned property.

I had read somewhere that slavery is still legal in a couple of mid-east
countries, and upon reading that, the first thought that had entered my
mind was "Lee" and what it might be like to travel with him to one of those
countries some day, giving up my citizenship and becoming his legally owned
property..."Irrevocably!"

Bizarre, outrageous, crazy?..yes.  Impossible?...probably, but I'm not 100%
sure.  Regardless, just considering such a possibility is an indication of
his power and the hold he had over me...it was to say the least very scary.

While his hold over me was indeed scary and seemingly overwhelming, wasn't
it I who had allowed it to be so, even encouraging him at every step along
the way.

Certainly he had a demanding superior and dominant presence about him, but
I could have simply avoided him..walked the other way.

Instead, I did everything to make myself known to him.  To make it known
that I was eager to be the fool, flunky and lackey that someone like Lee,
and yes, Carter, deserve to have at their beck and call.

Lee never had to know of Kay's existence, yet I had brought her to him much
as a loyal hound brings a prize to its master..and such a prize!

I could have told him that my parents had forbidden me to allow anyone else
to drive the Mustang, but instead, I meekly handed over the keys and
watched as he walked off to it hand in hand with the prize I had delivered
into his hands, and strangely, as I believe I have already mentioned, it
was a major turn on for me.

So the blame, or credit, depending on one's point of view for my situation
at that time was all mine.  Well mostly mine...Lee of course had a lot to
do with it.  He spun the web, but I knowingly jumped into it.

My reverie was interrupted this time by the light emanating from a slight
opening in the bedroom door.  It was Carter's mother. She whispered,
"Toad..time to get up."

No doubt Carter had left a wake up call for me. I got up and jumped into
the shower. Then after last night's activities, and not having a
toothbrush, I frantically searched for mouthwash, which I found, and rinsed
three times.

It was a little after 6 AM when I got down to the kitchen. Carter's mother
was there and asked if she could fix something.  I told her no that I was
used to fixing my own and didn't really eat much in the morning,

"You boys have such cute nick names.  First there was Worm and now
Toad. And such enterprising boys also.  We offer Carter fifteen dollars an
hour to do chores and he unselfishly says he has a friend who needs the
money and allows them to do it. And his friend Worm is such a hard worker
and always seems eager to please."

Little did she know that Worm is not even close to being her son's friend,
but rather he's his slave and never sees a penny of that money. Just as I'm
now his slave and won't see any either.

"Well, here's a list of things that have to be done for a start.  Mr. Von
Der Linn has several antique cars in the large garage that need to be
washed and waxed as well as our regular ones.  The lawn work can wait until
tomorrow. Oh, I'm afraid the riding mower is out for repairs, so you'll
have to use the push one, and there is some painting. When Carter gets up
he'll explain everything. The garage is open and each car has a key so you
can move them outside. You'll find everything you need. Well I'm going back
to bed...Have fun," she added cheerily.

Yeah, some fun.  I had slept for about an hour and was now dead tired and
had who knows how many hours of work ahead of me while Carter could sleep
on for as long as he wanted and he would get paid.

But somehow in my convoluted way of thinking it was imminently fair.  After
all, it had been Lee who set the terms for the race and I had lost.  So I
wasn't really obeying Carter, I was obeying Lee indirectly which made
everything correct...or something.

I went out to the large garage behind the house.  It was enormous... more
like a big barn.  I was actually kind of interested in seeing the antique
cars Ms. Von Der Linn had mentioned, although not at all interested in
working on them.

I let myself in and opened the electronically controlled doors to see ten
of the most beautiful old cars I had ever seen.

They each had a tag. One was a 1921 Dusenberg in perfect condition, another
a 1939 Cadillac convertible that was in showroom condition, and so on.
There must have been well over a million dollars worth of cars.

I had known that Carter's family was wealthy, but I hadn't realized just
how much so until now.  Seeing their estate-like home and now this,
elevated Carter's stature in my mind to new heights.  I now felt like an
indentured servant, with Carter as a young nobleman, or even royalty.  Lee
had chosen who was to be his friend well.

I brought out the first car and began my arduous task.  It took about two
hours or more for each. The maintenance sheet said each was to have old wax
removed and new wax hand applied after washing.

I wondered how many times Worm had done this while Carter got paid.  I
found it exciting thinking how Worm must have sweated in the sun, or froze
in winter while Carter was off someplace with Worm's ex girl friend, the
very sexy Dawn, enjoying the fruits of Worm's labor.

To pass the time my thoughts varied. I wondered if Worm had introduced Dawn
to Carter as I had brought Kay to Lee?  What were his thoughts on
that...how did he feel watching them together...jealous,
envious... excited?  And of course, why had he become Carters slave? What
motivated him.  I had to know...I would bring it up at the next
opportunity.

Then I thought, ten cars, at no lees than two hours each, times fifteen
dollars is three hundred dollars...for Carter.  Then there would be the
lawn work and painting mentioned.  Carter would do very well in the next
couple of days.

I wondered how many hours a day Carter would keep me going.  If yesterday
had counted as a day, then he only had me for today and tomorrow and would
no doubt take full advantage, especially at fifteen dollars an hour.

In a way I felt like some sort of a livery animal that had been rented
out...rented out by Lee.  No rental money had changed hands, but I had been
a chip Lee used for a bet...the same thing kind of.

It was another hot day and the sweat rolled off me in buckets, it seemed.
However I did have the hose and turned it on myself frequently.

I could tell by the sun that it was about noon as Carter approached from
the house wearing only his bikini, clogs and sun glasses.  I hated to admit
it, but he was an imposing figure.  Every bit the lord of the manor or
young nobleman I had thought of him as earlier, and I'm sure I must have
looked to him like the serf I had pictured myself as...which I definitely
felt like.

As he drew closer I actually wondered what he would think if I got on my
knees and touched the ground with my nose as he knew I did with Lee. I
could make it seem to be a joke or humorous in some way. Even though I did
not, it was an exciting thought and made me wonder to what depths my
subservient nature might carry me.

Carter inspected what I had done so far, and said, "You can stop for a
while and eat.  A half hour should be enough.  There's some stuff by the
pool...follow me."

Even in that he showed his dominant superior nature..."You can
stop."... giving his permission. "Follow me."...giving an order.  Even the
word "follow" had significance.  Not come with me, but "follow".. and it
would not have surprised me if it were followed by, "Like the Toad that you
are."

That wasn't said, but I followed anyway...respectfully, a few paces behind.
Carter was looming larger in my perception and adulation.

It was not at all that I was growing to like him...quite the contrary, I
disliked him more each day, but was becoming more and more impressed by his
arrogance and what seemed to me to be his natural superiority.

I suppose that was it...I felt inferior to him, and being subservient
seemed almost natural...especially since that subservience had been
mandated by Lee.

It was exciting to think that Lee had orchestrated the whole thing.
Without him I would not even be here serving and obeying Carter.

Even though he was not present, Lee was very much in control.  He had said,
"Do whatever Carter says," which ultimately led to Carter feeling he had
the right to do what the word "whatever" implies...so he performed the
ultimate "whatever," he came in my face...something, as he said, he had
always wanted to do.  Without Lee's permission, such an event could not
have occurred.  Not present, but in control.  The former leader of the
pack, all-American boy type had fallen a long way..had been totally
conquered by a very different, very Asian, newcomer to the scene.  But of
course without my compliance and willingness, that event could not have
occurred either.

I followed Carter to the house, feeling much like a puppy following its
master.  We went around to the back where I encountered an Olympic sized,
kidney-shaped swimming pool.  Very impressive, as was just about everything
about this place.

Dawn was stretched out on a chaise lounge, under an umbrella, wearing a jet
black mini bikini and black sun glasses.  She seemed more sexy looking
every time I saw her.  She wasn't quite in Kay's category... but close.
Once again, the word "wow" came to mind.

Seeing her in these surroundings would be reason enough as to why she had
dumped Worm.  But of course there were no doubt many other reasons.

She paid no attention to me at all.  Didn't even look my way.  There was
some food on a table at the other end of the pool.  I hadn't eaten yet and
headed for it eagerly.  Also a half hour is not a lot of time.

Carter mounted a diving board at the end of the pool and dived expertly
into it, with hardly a ripple.  He swam, also expertly, to the other end
and joined Dawn.

It occurred to me that they could play and frolic all day if they wanted
too, while I would be back in no time at all to drudgery..and all for
Carter's benefit.

I ate in silence watching as Carter and Dawn conversed and cuddled as if I
were not even there.

When I had finished and was about to return to the garage, Carter snapped
his fingers and called out, "Toad, over here."  Arrogant SOB, I thought,
but after last night's event who could blame him.

I dutifully hurried over and stood before them.  It occurred to me that
kneeling before them would be more appropriate--just more of the bizarre
types of thoughts that popped into my head most of the time lately.

"Run in and bring out a couple of cold drinks before you go."  I assumed
that Carter wanted to show off and impress Dawn, who had a satisfied smirk
on her painted lips, and even though I could not see her eyes behind the
dark sun glasses I knew she was looking me up and down contemptuously.

I don't know why but I thought to add to Carter's esteem by answering in my
most servile tone, "Sure Carter, right away.  Anything else?"

Dawn responded in a contemptuous tone, "If there was, he would have told
you."

As close to a slap in the face as it gets.  A real bitch all right, but
there was just something about her, something that made me want to kiss her
ass despite her bitchiness, or even more likely because of it.

I served them their drinks and returned to my laborious task, leaving them
to enjoy the day.  I'm sure Carter was especially enjoying the day since he
would be getting fifteen dollars an hour to do so.  It suddenly occurred to
me, that was more than many union workers were getting.  Well why not, they
could certainly afford it.

It was seven PM when I finished car number six.  I had put in almost
thirteen hours and was totally exhausted.  I called home and told my mother
I was staying over again.

When questioned about clothes I told her my host had generously allowed me
to use his.  Actually Carter's mother had.

After I had eaten she came to me at about eight and said, "My you are a
workhorse aren't you, just like Carter's other friend, Worm.  Carter told
me before he went out that you wanted to put in another three hours
tonight.  Are you sure?  You don't have to you know."

Oh no, I was just about ready to drop in my tracks.  But what could I
do...say her son was a liar and wanted all the money he could get by
working my ass off.

"No ma'am, I"m not tired and I want to be sure I finish all of them before
I leave."

I trudged out to that now hated garage and worked till eleven.  When I got
to the bedroom I just about collapsed onto my blanket and was out
immediately.

I don't know what time it was, but it seemed I was dreaming of a waterfall
or something like that, when I opened my eyes to see Carter naked, standing
over me holding his rod and directing it's stream on to my face.

He was obviously a little tipsy again and said, "Hey, time to wake up and
make yourself useful again."

I quickly rolled out of the way, but the humiliation was already done.
Carter was really getting his revenge.  Last night he had come in my face
and just now he had pissed in my face.  It didn't take much imagination to
assume what was next.

"Up on your knees boy...where you belong."  When I hesitated, he said, Or
maybe I should tell Dawn about last night, and the stuff with Lee, and if I
do, guess who she'll tell.'

It was hopeless.  I was once again at his mercy and there was none to be
had.  This time he completed the cycle.  He came in my mouth.

Then he said, "Oh yeah, about the blanket. If my mother notices, we'll just
say you had an accident."

"Sure Carter, anything you say."

Carter fell into his comfortable looking bed while I curled up on the
floor.

I didn't even have the blanket, since it had been dampened quite a bit by
Carter's unique wake up call.

I wondered, not if, but how many times he had awakened Worm in the same
manner.  I could imagine the hapless, inferior Worm, coughing and
sputtering, being roused from his slumber by the arrogant, superior
Carter's urine filling his mouth.

There was of course resentment and outrage at such a humiliation having
been perpetrated on me, but even as the magnitude of his action sank in,
there was also, strangely, a heightened sense of respect and admiration for
him, almost akin to that which had attracted me to Lee. Not the same, but
similar.

The feelings of resentment and outrage subsided much more quickly than one
might imagine, and then too...well, why not, why shouldn't he?  I was his
to use, and abuse if he wanted too in any way he wanted.  Somehow
rationalizing it all...seeing it all his way even as my dislike for him was
still growing stronger.

It seemed once again that I had just shut my eyes when the door opened
slightly allowing in the light from the hall and I heard Mrs. Von Der
Linn's voice, hushed so as not to disturb Carter, saying, "5:30, Toad, time
to get up."

Last night, in three hours, I had finished two small cars...An Austin and
an MG, making a total of eight.  Only two to go, except for the two family
cars.

But of course, speed didn't matter.  Carter was being paid by the hour for
my labor.  However if I could finish them all by noon, maybe I could take a
break.  Yeah right, some chance that was.  Carter wouldn't get paid for
break time.

Between six and nine AM, it was fairly cool, but when the sun rose in the
sky, it quickly went into the nineties and the sweat was pouring out.  I
wondered what Lee and Kay were doing now?  Probably relaxing by his pool in
the shade or having a cold drink on a float in the water.

Picturing those two magnificent bodies together in their bikinis was always
a turn on, but for whatever reason, it was even more so as I labored under
Lee's orders.

I managed to finish all four cars by noon and headed for the house.  I
heard laughing and splashing coming from the swimming pool area, and there
were some cars out front, including Worm's town car.  He had no doubt,
chauffeured Lee and Kay.

I also thought I recognized the car that had picked up Herbert at Lee's
pool party, driving off.  I had difficulty in seeing him as Carter's
friend...but things change, and who would know better than me?