Date: Sun, 22 Aug 2004 10:43:10 -0400 (EDT)
From: Sean Roberts <seanr_13@yahoo.ca>
Subject: The Silver Compass - 18

The Silver Compass - 18
By: Sean Roberts

Author's Note: Please send feedback to seanr_13@yahoo.ca

It is very much appreciated.

A Memory

Michael's parents had missed her.  Mrs. Miller fussed
over making sure she was comfortable while Mr. Miller asked
to see Michael in another room.  They went to the foyer.

"So everything's okay?" he asked Michael.

"I don't think I'm gay dad.  I think it was just a
phase."

"It happens Mike.  To lot's of people.  I'm glad you
figured it out, and that you and Sarah are friends again."
They both turned to the door when they saw a figure
approaching.  Michael did not get to the door before the
bell rang.  He opened it immediately.  Julia Black, in
sweat pants and a black tank top was sobbing outside his
door.

"Julia..." She threw her arms around him.  Mrs. Miller,
Matthew and Sarah appeared behind them.

"He...he was in an accident," she said, letting go of
Michael.

"Who?" Michael asked.  He knew, of course, but he
needed the delay.  He needed the time to reassure himself
that it wasn't Cameron before he could allow the news to
sink in.

"Cameron!" she said.  "He's dead Mike!"  She threw her
arms around him again and he held her.  He turned to his
father, not knowing what to do.

Michael was introduced as a friend of Cameron's.  He
gave his condolences to Cameron's parents.  Julia kept him
around her.  Her parents probably wondered how such a good
friend of Cameron's, and apparently of Julia's, has never
met them.  He had probably never gone home.  He had
probably not told Julia they had broken up.

"He had been drinking," Julia told Michael a few days
later.  "A lot.  Which is strange.  Well, no," she said,
letting out a giggle in between tears.  "He loves to drink
a lot.  But with his friends.  And when they have a driver.
He never drives when he's been drinking.  And none of his
friends were even with him that night.  Something must have
happened to him.  If he had just told me, or my parents,
or..."

"Julia," said Michael.  "I was with him that day."

"What?"

"It was me.  I was with him, earlier.  I-I broke up
with him."

"You did..."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier but I didn't know
how to say it.  I feel absolutely horrible.  It's my fault
Julia.  He was upset, I know he was, and that's probably
why he went..."

"Drinking.  That doesn't surprise me."

"Julia I'm so sorry..."

"No, Mike, please.  He knew what he was doing.  You're
not responsible.  It isn't your fault.  Come here.  There's
something I want to give you."

She took him into Cameron's bedroom and opened his
closet.  "He bought his Christmas presents already.  I
found one for you.  I hid it, I didn't want my parents to
see it."  She handed him the neatly wrapped gift.  "We're
all really glad he did that, because now we have stuff to
remember him by.  I mean, not like we don't have other
things, but it's nice."

"Yeah.  It really is."

"Please don't blame yourself Mike.  Whatever
happened...well, happened.  It's going to be tough though.
These past few days, him not being around, it's...I can't
even describe how horrible it is.  Mike, could I call you
sometime?  I'd really like to sort of keep in touch.  You
meant a lot to him you know."

"Of course, Julia.  You can call me any time."  He
hugged her.  He had managed to hold back tears the entire
time he was with Julia but he didn't know how for how much
longer he could do it.  "Take care."  He left her in
Cameron's room.  She did not look like she wanted to leave
it.  She was trying to get into his world to ease the pain.



Michael locked himself in his bed room.  The wrapping
paper was a dark, metallic blue.  With a gold ribbon.  He
untied it slowly; he opened the paper carefully.  Contained
in a small box was a silver pocket watch.  He flipped it
open.  But it was too thick to be just a watch.  There was
another face; a compass.  On the back his initials were
engraved.  He opened the card.

Merry Christmas Mike!

I know you've been going through a bit of a rough patch
with your family.  Maybe this will help you find direction
in your life (by remembering me -- hint, hint).  I love you
Mike, more than anything in the world.

Me--Cam

He could not accept it after what he had done.
Michael put the gift and the card carefully back in the
box.  And then he went downstairs to have dinner with his
family.