Date: Fri, 27 Jun 2003 13:41:34 -0700 (PDT)
From: Mark Arbour <markarbour2000@yahoo.com>
Subject: On the Mark 6

PREFACE: I am writing this story primarily as a self-exploration tool. I
invite you to come along for the ride, which is sometimes rocky, often
boring, and not always happy. Unfortunately, it's not always very erotic
either. That being said, and if M/M and M/F sex doesn't upset you, read
on. Since this is my story, please don't reproduce or publish it anywhere
without asking me first: markarbour2000@yahoo.com
<mailto:markarbour2000@yahoo.com>.


DEDICATION: This story, good, bad, or otherwise, is dedicated to John Walsh
of "Fraternity Memoirs" fame, whose ability and willingness to bare his
soul in his story inspired me to try to do the same. Join our group at:
fraternitymemoirs2-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
<mailto:fraternitymemoirs2-subscribe@yahoogroups.com>

CHAPTER 6

The rest of the summer pretty much went along the same way. I spent a lot
of time with Mari, obviously, and we had sex about once a week. That was
fine, since I saw Darryl pretty much every day. We'd hook up almost much
every time we were together. Sometimes, I'd just suck his dick. Other
times, we'd fuck around or he'd jack me off. I developed this pretty slick
behavior modification system to deal with him. If he just wanted a blow
job, fine, I was glad to help him out. But if that was it, I didn't swallow
or anything else. Just plain vanilla head. If he wanted more excitement, he
was going to have to get me off too. It actually worked pretty well.

My parents always plan our vacation at the end of summer. Our normal
routine is that we go to Chicago every other year (my father is from there)
and go somewhere else on the off year. This was our "off" year, so my
parents had decided that we should spend a week at the beach. I got into a
big fight with my parents because they were letting my sister (Monica)
bring a friend along, but they told me I couldn't. So we yelled and
screamed at each other....my dad got so pissed I thought he was going to
smack me, which he never did. I refused to go. I can be pretty stubborn
when I want to, especially with my parents, so they probably believed that
I would.

I couldn't understand their logic. It wasn't like them to be this blatantly
unfair. Then the clues about their real issues started to surface. First of
all I found out that Monica's room had twin beds, whereas mine had one
queen size bed. Then my mom kind of cautiously asked me who I would take if
they let me bring someone. It finally dawned on me that they were putting
up this major fight because they didn't want me to bring Mari or Darryl
along. I could understand Mari, but why Darryl? Did they just not want him
around? That seemed unlikely, since he was over all the time and they
genuinely seemed to like him. Did they not want me sleeping in the same bed
with him? What did they know about us? I kind of started to freak out a
little bit.

It was a combination of fear, curiosity, and anger which made me decide to
test them. I decided to push on my mom. She was less volatile and would
give away more of her thoughts. I asked her if I could bring Darryl with
us. She hemmed and hawed, and made up all these dumb-ass excuses, and
talked about how crowded it would be (hmmmm), etc. I didn't get pissed: I
just let it drop. That night, at dinner, I told my parents that I really
wanted to invite Van to go with us. They resisted just long enough to put
on a show, then cheerfully decided that was fine.

Truthfully, I really wanted Van to go anyway. I had spent most of my summer
with Mari and Darryl, and while I liked sex with both of them, it was
getting a little boring. I kept remembering the intensity of my camping
trip with Van, and I was really curious to know if anything would happen
with us sleeping in the same bed. Van was stoked when I asked him, and we
both got totally pumped when it cleared the final approval process: his
parents.

My parents rented a really cool house right next to the beach. You just had
to walk down the stairs and you were there...awesome. The first day was
pretty mellow, since we spent the morning driving over and getting
settled. Van and I unpacked our stuff. I had told him about the queen size
bed...he didn't seem to care...but it looked a little smaller when we
got there. We took off and explored the beach. There were still some people
there, and we kind of flirted with these chicks we met on the beach, but no
big deal. It was just like our camping trip only more, what was the
word...romantic?

Walking along the beach, with the sun and the surf, hanging out and talking
to Van, I remembered for the zillionth time what a completely awesome guy
he was. It was great. And of course I brought along my stash (I still had
some left from camping!). That night we got stoned and went down and sat on
the rocks and just talked about life.

"So Mark, are you in love with Mari?" he asked me. "I think so," I told
him, and went into this diatribe about how all these emotions were new. The
real answer was that I loved the one I was with. When I was with Mari, I
loved her. When I was with Darryl, I loved him. But right now, I was in
love with Van. At 14/15, I guess love can be that fluid.

We went to bed that night and it was so great to lie next to him. We were
both in just our boxers, so it was real intimate. We started talking about
sex, and he told me that he had been hanging around with Tanya a lot more,
and that they were going together, and that they finally had sex. So we
talked about that...apparently he was so big it was pretty tough, but now
she really seemed to like it. I'll bet. I was excited listening to him, but
jealous too. I wanted to be Tanya, I wanted him to fuck me. Well, not
really, but I wanted to have that kind of intimate relationship with him.

Then he pulled down the covers and showed me his boxers...his dick was
pointing straight through the hole in front and was hard as hell. I giggled
and pulled down the covers on my side...I was boning like crazy. "Mind if
I jack off?" he said with a smile. "Mind if I join you?" I asked with a
giggle, and we started stroking our dicks. I couldn't help staring at his
dick. It was so damn big, and the harder he got, the more pronounced the
veins on the side of his shaft got. It was so sexy. I noticed that he
seemed to be looking at my dick a lot, so I made sure to put on a good
show. I got a little too into it, and felt my balls tense and my orgasm
start. I wanted to make this last, but what are you gonna do? Right as that
first, intense shot blew out of my dick I looked over at Van and saw his
eyes glued on my spewing cock. He was totally staring at me cum, and that
got me so excited I just kept cumming and cumming. His fist was moving
faster and faster. There was cum all over my chest and my stomach. I don't
know what possessed me, but I reached down and ran my finger through one of
the pools of cum, smearing it around on my stomach. Van was watching me,
and as soon as I did that, he started to blow. When I cum, I'm loud and
have to bite my hand or muzzle myself. With Van, all you hear is his
breath, and grunts through his gritted teeth. He is so sexy and
masculine. He is such a man.

We cleaned off our bodies and joked about how much cum there was. Then we
went to sleep. I was hoping for a repeat of the camping experience, but I
wasn't going to make the first move. I woke up in the middle of the night
and kind of moved around, and even played with his chest for a bit, but the
boy was out. So I curled up next to him like I did on the camping trip,
with my head on his chest, and fell peacefully back to sleep. I don't think
I'd ever felt so safe before.

Those days on the beach were one of the best experiences of my life. We
kind of got into a pattern of jacking off every night before we went to
sleep. It was really intimate, and it seemed totally natural. I didn't have
the guilt I had with Darryl...this was normal behavior for a teenager I
told myself..and I was much more excited than when I had sex with Mari. But
each night it was getting harder and harder to keep my hands to
myself. Each night we jacked together, I wanted him more. My frustration
was mounting exponentially.

On the fourth night of our trip, I finally broke the routine. We had been
talking about sex and were hard as usual, and started slowly stroking our
cocks under the covers. Then Van pulled the covers off, and, for the first
time, pulled off his boxers. I was so excited...I got a great view of his
big balls when he did that. I was oozing pre-cum at the thought of sucking
them in my mouth. I pulled mine off too, and we started jacking a little
more intently. I spread my legs wide..it was easy without the boxers, and
Van did too, so our legs were rubbing against each other as we
masturbated. I kept looking at his cock, and his body, and marveling at how
beautiful he was. Then I looked up at his face and we made eye contact. We
usually didn't do that, and, this may sound weird, but it was really
intense. I just stared into his eyes, and he into mine, and I felt all my
reserve flying out the window. I had no restraint, I lost all judgment. I
was consumed, completely consumed, by lust. I leaned in and gently kissed
him on the lips.

At first, he didn't respond, and I was terrified, but it only took him a
second to return my kiss. Then he took over. He kissed my firmly but
gently, rolling me on my back and laying to the side of me with one leg
draped over mine. I could feel his hard cock pressed against my leg, and I
could feel his leg gently moving over my dick. My dick was leaking so much
it was like I already came. He kissed me so gently, moving his tongue into
my mouth, slowly twirling our tongues together. I felt as if we were a car
going down a steep hill and he had his foot on the brake, barely able to
slow us. It was so intense for such a big guy to be so slow and gentle. I
was totally absorbed. He was in complete control; I'd never felt that
submissive in my life.

His kisses began to get more intent, and he started to move his hips and
rub his dick against my leg. He moved his hand down and grabbed my cock and
started stroking me. He instinctively knew to go slow...if he would have
used any speed I would have blown immediately. He wrapped his leg around my
leg and started humping me while laying on his side. He kept his mouth
firmly on mine, and the intensity of his kisses controlled our pace. I
could feel him getting more excited, I could feel his cock throbbing
against my leg. His kisses began to get more urgent, to the point where it
was like our tongues were wrestling. His hand started going faster and I
knew I was gonna blow. But then, he slowed the pace back, and calmed it
down for a bit...damn, if he would have kept going for just a few seconds
longer, I'd have drained my balls. But he knew what he was doing. He kept
us at the edge. It was so awesome because I had no control at all. All I
could do was kiss him back, assault him with my tongue, and wrap my arms
around his back. He stopped kissing me and just looked in my eyes. I
reached up and ran my fingers through his hair. He had that look in his
eyes, the look of a crazed beast. I knew that I must have looked the same
way. I was panting and rocking with his body. I grabbed the back of his
head kind of roughly, kind of pulling his hair, and growled "You are
fucking amazing". "Oh yeah," he sneered back at me, "you like that" as he
slid his hand up and down my cock. We were two animals. He picked up his
pace and I knew this time we were going to cum. I pulled him to my mouth
and kissed him hard..real hard. I felt his body tense up, his dick throbbed
against my leg, and he gritted his teeth as we kissed and started blowing
his load. I felt the cum shoot against my leg, felt his hot breath shooting
out his nose. Then he made me cum. I wrapped my arms around his head and
screamed into his mouth. My hips thrust into his fist with each spurt. Just
like this whole encounter, I had no control. My body was blowing itself out
and my mind had no say. I felt like I came forever. I let go of my lip lock
on him and he just smiled down at me.

He laid his head on my shoulder. There was cum everywhere, but I didn't
care. We didn't say anything for about half an hour. It was like we didn't
have the energy. Then he looked up at me and had a worried expression on
his face. "That was pretty gay, don't you think?" he said. I remembered how
Darryl freaked out, and I almost panicked. I couldn't stand it if anything
happened to our friendship. I looked right back at him and said "I don't
give a shit, it was so much fucking fun!" He smiled back at me, and I knew
that everything would be OK.

We spent our days in the waves or on the sand. We'd met these girls who
lived about 5 miles away from us and were on vacation too. We worked them
pretty hard, and ended up making out with them, but that was it. It just
made us both hornier.

It was our final night at the beach, as we were leaving the next
morning. Vacation was almost over. And I was really sad about that. I was
sad not only because I loved the beach, but because it would mean an end to
my time here with Van. We pretty much packed up our stuff, and went to bed
kind of early. As we lay in bed together, I felt some tension in the
air. This was the first time all week, that I had felt that, and the first
time all week that we didn't immediately start talking about sex. I was
starting to get a little nervous, and I looked over at Van. He was laying
on his back, and he moved his eyes to the side to look at me. For about the
millionth time I marveled at what a total Adonis this boy was. I smiled to
myself, and he saw me and smiled back. I leaned over and kissed him on the
lips, starting slow, and letting my tongue work its way into his mouth. We
just lay there side by side, making out, running our hands across each
other's bodies. It was exciting...it was fun...it was time for the next
step. I pushed him down on his back and began licking his nipples. First
one, then the other. He wasn't moaning, he was just exhaling sharply. I
knew it was the same thing...just his way. I ran my tongue down his
chest, down his stomach, to his navel. I swirled my tongue around in his
navel, then moved down towards his massive cock. I looked up and locked my
eyes with his as I moved my tongue up the shaft and flicked it around the
rim of his cock. His eyes were begging me to suck his dick. I teased him
mercilessly, to the point where the touch of my tongue caused him to thrust
towards me in spasms of desire. Gently I took his cock in my mouth and
began to slowly suck him. This time, I was going to make it last. His hips
began to rock in rhythm with my mouth. I had learned about him and his
body. I could tell when he was close and I backed off. Then I'd go at his
cock again. His breathing was erratic....he finally looked down at me and
begged "Please", which was all he had to say. I went after it now. I was
out to make him cum. It didn't take long! He moaned through his teeth "I'm
cumming", and I think he expected me to pull off. I swallowed his massive
cock and took shot after shot down my throat. I was so proud of myself, I
took it all, squeezing his head with the back of my throat. This guy was
drained. I moved up to lay next to him, and he surprised me by planting a
soft, wet kiss on my lips. God I was horny, but I figured I'd just kick
back with him for a while and then jack off.

"Man, I've had the best time on this trip," he said to me. "Me too," I said
smiling back at him. I snuggled in more closely and began to run my hands
gently over his chest. We lay there reminiscing about our week, and about
how much fun it had been. After about 20 minutes, he kissed me again, and
more aggressively. I was so hard it almost hurt...I was gonna have to
blow my load soon. He moved his mouth to my neck and started kissing my
neck from ear to ear. That is such a turn on for me. I ran my hands through
his hair and caressed his head. Then he moved to my nipples. WOW. Major
erogenous zone. I grabbed the pillow and held it over my face to muffle my
moaning. Then he started to move his mouth down my chest, and my stomach,
just like I had done to him. I removed the pillow and looked down at him in
amazement. Surely he wasn't going to suck my dick. No one had ever sucked
my dick. He looked up at me with a sly grin as he moved his mouth towards
my cock, and began to tease me like I teased him. I bit down on my
hand....I wanted to watch him suck me. He lowered his mouth down and took
about half my dick, and slowly began moving up and down, taking a little
more every time. I can't, to this day, describe the complete ecstasy I felt
at getting my first blow job. It felt so good, and it was so good that it
was Van. I was close. I felt the cum boiling up in my balls. "I'm gonna
cum!", I said, a little too loudly, as I grabbed my pillow and screamed
into it. He wasn't coming off me. Oh my God, he was gonna take my load. If
it wasn't for the pillow I would have woken the whole house up and most of
the neighbors. I pumped shot after shot in his mouth until it was too much,
and I felt him milking the rest of my load out with his hand. I was
spent. I couldn't talk. I couldn't move. One thing was certain...I loved
getting my dick sucked! A whole new door opened for me.

He crawled up and laid down next to me with his head on my chest. I gently
stroked his hair. This was so intimate. This was heaven. Then I made one of
the biggest blunders of my life. I was so overcome, I was so euphoric, it
was like I was high, and I looked in his eyes and said "I love you Van." He
got this worried look on his face, and I could read the confusion and
discomfort in his eyes. Oh shit. How typical of me to take one of the most
exciting things in my life and ruin it. He said he was tired, with a half
smile, and rolled over on his side with his back to me. I was devastated. I
rolled over on my side with my back to him as well, and I felt the tears
starting to flow. I would not let him see me cry. I was such a pussy. I
couldn't stop them. What if I ruined our friendship? What if he decided
never to speak to me again? What if he decided to tell everyone at school I
was a fag? The rest of the night was a living hell. I couldn't sleep, I
couldn't get up, I couldn't really move, and I didn't want to touch
him. Suddenly he was off limits. All I could do was cry into my pillow. It
wasn't long before my silent tears had damn near drenched the thing.

The next day we were pretty much scurrying to get going. Van treated me
pretty much like he always did, and I began to relax a bit. In the end, I
realized that I was lucky. Van was not going to end our friendship over my
idiotic admission. I knew, though, that our days of fucking around were
over. I found myself thinking "back to the old grind" of sex with Mari and
Darryl, then I chided myself for being an ungrateful bastard. They were
both hot in their own ways, and not many guys my age were lucky enough to
have real people to get off with.

It's taken me up to now to cover one summer, so I need to pick up the pace
of the story. Freshman year was a fun year for me. It was cool having a
girlfriend. All of my friends were constantly concerned about women, and
getting laid, and I could put that out of my mind. Well, that's not
entirely true. I could put the hunt for new women out of my mind. My sex
life with Mari cooled off when school started. I attribute that to all of
her bitch friends who wouldn't put out, and they made her feel like a
slut. I'd say we slowed down to sex every couple of weeks, but I could
usually talk her into a hand job or two on the weekends. It wasn't perfect,
but I was doing better than most. We had our fights...or more like
spats...but it wasn't too serious. I was content with her. I loved
her. But as the year went on, I realized that I was not "in love" with her.

I made the swim team, and that got me, much to my surprise, a whole new
group of friends. Three guys on the team became good buds. Julie was the
guy who was with Aaron Bryce when he tried to kick my ass. It was funny,
but we really hit it off well. Actually, we'd always gotten along, but now
that we were swimming together, we started to bond. Julie had reddish
blonde hair, was kind of short, and his body was almost hairless. But damn,
could that kid swim fast. After we had started hanging out, he nervously
apologized for the thing with Aaron. The fact that I totally blew the whole
incident off and never held it against him sealed our friendship. Paul had
long brown curly hair, was average height, with a killer swimmer's body. He
excelled at all the "less popular" sports, like wrestling and track. He was
pretty calm and easy going, and fun to tease. I gave him endless shit about
being a wrestler. He'd be down on the mat and I'd tell him that I he looked
like he was waiting for the guy on top to fuck him up the ass. He'd just
say "fuck you" very calmly, which was like his favorite expression. Chris
was the third guy. He was a surfer. He looked like one, talked like one,
and actually was one. Long blonde hair that never was styled (remember,
this is the 70's...hair was styled) quite right because he was always in
the water, almost as tall as me, eyes a little too close together, and a
killer smile: Chris was hot. Of all the guys, Chris seemed the least
interested in the women who were after him. He was one of those guys who
was into what he was into, and women were an afterthought, usually at
parties on weekends when he was wasted and horny.

In the high school "group" scene, we were part of the hybrid "semi-jock"
and "brain" group. Not the most poplular, but popular enough to get invited
to all the good parties. We lived in our own little world, for the most
part, along with upper-classmen who were like us. Fortunately, Van was part
of this group too. I had ruined our sexual experimentation, but we were as
good of friends as ever. He and Tanya were a pretty tight couple. A lot of
time on the weekends we'd go out with them together....the double date
thing. Especially later in the year when Van got his license. Tanya and I
got along OK, but not great. She was one of the girls that seemed to make
Mari frigid, plus there was no denying the fact that I was totally jealous
of her. When she was hanging on Van, when he'd bend down and kiss her, I'd
have to take a deep breath and control the green monster.

Darryl ran with a completely different crowd. He ran with the burn
outs. There were three academic levels at our school. The college prep
level (where I was at), the middle level, and the remedial level. Darryl
was always in the middle level classes, while most of his friends were in
the remedial ones. I'd catch him stoned at school quite a bit. At big
parties, our groups would mix, since they were experts at getting
wasted. Otherwise, we didn't really have much to do with them. Darryl and I
still hooked up, but much less frequently. He was way more daring than
me. Every once in a while he'd talk me into getting a hall pass in the
middle of one of the classes and meet him in the bathroom for a
"quickie". And he'd come over on the weekends once in a while, and even
spent the night a few times.

Those were fun nights! We'd stay in my room, ostensibly sleeping in
sleeping bags on the floor, but we'd spend the night in bed together. The
first time he spent the night, we had sleeping bags all set up and were
getting ready for bed, when I looked at him and said "we can sleep on
these, or in my bed...it's up to you." He gave me that lop-sided smile
(uh oh) and took off all his clothes until he was standing in front of me
completely naked. The older he got, the more amazing his body got, and I
was constantly surprised because it seemed like that was impossible. He was
starting to bulk up more, and his shoulders were getting broader. Today, he
would be an Abercrombie and Fitch model. His hard cock was sticking out at
a 45 degree angle...from smile to legs he was a God. "I think the bed
would be more comfortable, don't you?" he replied. Fuck yeah, I thought as
he moved over to me and kissed me passionately on the lips. We moved
together towards the bed and he laid down on top of me, rubbing our bodies
and cocks together as we made out. I loved this contact with him. He knew
how to mold his body to mine so we'd touch in all the right places. I'd
feel his nipples press against mine, I'd feel his hard cock rub against
mine, our legs would wrap together, and my erotic level would reach new
highs. He knew me, knew what I liked...knew how to make me so hot I could
hardly stand it.

Summer was more of the same, which was good. Van had his drivers license
and his parently got him a car, so we were mobile. We went to the beach a
lot, usually as a "double-dating" thing. The four of us got along well, and
it was nice because Tanya and Mari seemed to like each other a lot, and
they'd go off and do chick things and give me time alone with Van. Summer
seemed to warm up Mari, so she was more fun, and I got laid more.

I saw Darryl pretty much about the same amount of time as I did during
school, which worked out to about every few weeks. He didn't swim as much
as he used too, and was spending more and more time stoned. We were
definitely on different paths with our lives.

Our 4th of July party was fun, as usual. Shawn's parents had separated this
year, and his dad had moved out. Shawn was always such a down person, it
was hard to tell how it affected him. So his mom shows up to this party
with this guy in his late 20's. He kind of looks like the Marlboro man. I
kept catching him looking at me and smiling. The whole thing kind of
weirded me out...but he was pretty hot. It's funny how you remember the
weirdest things, but I thought it was funny that the song "Barracuda" by
Heart was playing when Shawn's mom walked into the house.

This was the summer that we went to Chicago for vacation. There was going
to be a big party while I was gone at Harry and Jeana's. They threw good
parties anyway, and their parents were going to be gone, so this one would
be great! It was planned for the same day we left for Chicago. I tried to
get my mom to let me stay home for a few days and then fly out, but it was
no-go. Then, I had an amazing stroke of good luck. I'd never had ear
problems before, which was rare for all the swimming I did. Two days before
we were supposed to leave I got a monster earache. My mom was pretty
suspicious about the whole thing. She knew I was a pretty good actor, and
that there was a distinct possibility that it was fake. This was getting
better and better. So she hauled me into the doctor the day before we were
supposed to leave, and he told her that I had a major ear infection. I
wasn't allowed to fly, or to swim for that matter, for at least a week. Now
she felt guilty because I really was sick, and that would make her easier
to fool the next time I needed to. In the end, they decided to go ahead and
go without me. Van's mom told my mom they'd be around to help me out, and
since I was 15, they decided that I could be left home alone. So here I
was, 15 years old, with the house all to myself, in the summer, for 10
days. Can you say party?

All this wasn't worked out until the day my parents left, so they had to
book to make it to the airport. They left me cash (yeah!) and I played the
sicko by going to bed before they left. It was kind of funny...I really
was pretty sick...so I fell asleep and didn't wake up until that night. I
was kind of pissed, because I knew that the party had already been going on
for awhile. I took a shower, and stopped to admire myself in the
mirror. From the chubby, ugly kid that had almost gotten his ass kicked a
little over a year ago, I had gotten pretty good looking. Not perfect,
though, that's for sure. Slim, in shape, but with no bulging muscles. No
rippling abs. Just a smooth stomach and a small treasure trail. I'd grown
my own! I put on one of those "silk" shirts that were so popular then, the
requisite puka shells, Big Bell Cords (little dressier than jeans for the
party), and, of course, my black comb. My hair was down just over my ears,
parted in the middle, and feathered back on the sides. I had gotten some of
those "Earth Shoes", and they were still pretty new, so I thought I cut a
pretty good figure.

As I walked up to Harry's house, I could hear "Calling Dr. Love" by Kiss
blaring out from the back yard. I wondered if anyone would call the
cops. Oh well, if that happened, Van's mom would have to bail him out, so
what was one more? I went into their backyard and did a shot with Harry and
smoked a bowl with Shawn. I was starting to get a good buzz. One more shot,
and I went in to find Mari. She didn't know that I didn't go to
Chicago. She'd be so happy to see me. I saw Van and Tanya in the living
room...Harry's house was gonna be trashed....and Van said they hadn't seen
Mari for a while, but she was pretty drunk the last time he talked to
her. Cool, I thought. I'll get laid. I was getting pretty excited.

As I walked away from them, I saw Tanya lean over and whisper something in
Van's ear, and he got a worried look on his face. That's when I knew
something was wrong. The only place I hadn't checked was upstairs, so I
headed for the second floor. I'll never forget that the song playing was
"Feels Like the First Time" by Foreigner. Most of the bedroom doors were
open except one, Harry's parents'. As I got to the top of the stairs, and
rounded the banister to head for that room, I saw Van say something to
Tanya and start to walk towards the stairs. Something was very wrong. When
I got to the door, I heard a voice I recognized oh so well. I heard Mari's
voice, moaning. I knew her. She was fucking someone.

It is rare in my life that I completely lose my temper, and almost never do
I become physically violent. This was one of those times. I backed up and
kicked the doors open (they were double doors, but one of them came off the
hinges) and I saw Van start to run towards the stairs. The first thing I
saw was two ass cheeks staring at me. The guy who was fucking her sure had
a cute ass. "What the fuck?!" he yelled, and rolled off of her pissed as
hell. I knew this guy. It was Aaron Bryce. I thought I recognized that
ass. I was consumed with rage and I lept on the bed, landing right on
him. He didn't expect that, and neither did Mari, the movement of the bed
knocked her right off and onto the floor. She was naked and
crying...totally humiliated. Later, I would draw some satisfaction from
that. I landed on him and my knee nailed him right in the balls. He moaned
in pain. "You fucking son of a bitch!" I screamed. I took both of my hands
together and made a fist and smashed it down on his nose as hard as I
could. Blood flew from his nose. I got in a right hook, and kneed him in
the groin one more time before I felt two very strong arms wrap around
me. I knew those arms. It was Van. "God Damn it, let me go. I'm gonna kill
this bastard," I was screaming at the top of my lungs. He was pulling me
off Aaron who was in bad shape. I relaxed to make Van complacent and then
gave Aaron one more good kick in the balls. Van dragged me off the bed and
out of the room. As I was leaving, I looked at Mari, and she looked up at
me. You can hurt someone physically, you can hurt someone verbally, but I
knew that this time, all I had to do was look at her. I could achieve so
much more with just my eyes.

There were a bunch of people up there now, including Harry, who was really
pissed about the doors, but then he saw Mari and Aaron and mellowed out. I
was crazed. I was screaming every obscenity I could think of and struggling
against Van and a few other guys who were trying to get me out of
there. Halfway down the hall Van must have finally gotten pissed off,
because he slammed me against the wall and said "Knock it off Mark. Now
you're fucking with me. Let's just get the fuck out of here." I looked into
his face and saw that he was there for me, and I trusted him. He led me out
of the house and down the street. I didn't say much on the way, and neither
did he. I was stunned. I couldn't believe that Mari would do that to
me. And with Bryce, that asshole. I felt the rage rising in me again. As if
on cue, Van said "You fucked him up pretty bad. There was blood all over
the place." I felt the rage subside. We were walking up the steps to my
house, and I knew what was coming next. I'd never felt emotional pain like
that before, but I could feel it coming. We walked in the door and I
started walking upstairs, by the time I got to my room, I broke. I turned
around and just started crying. Sobbing would be a better word for it. Van
hugged me, and held me while I just wracked myself apart. I was hurt, I was
betrayed, and I was embarrassed. Some time later, I would realize that I
wasn't an angel and that I had fucked around on her with both Van and
Darryl, and that I wasn't really in love with her anyway, but the teen age
love for drama was in control. This was a soap opera. It was my scene. I
was going for the Daytime Emmy.

I calmed down and Van and I sat down on my bed and talked about the whole
thing. "What a fucking whore," he said, which was pretty strong stuff from
him, considering that he and Mari were good friends too. The phone rang,
and Van answered it. It was Tanya. I heard him say "Who gives a shit if
she's upset. Fucking slut." and I heard them arguing for a while, then he
came in and said that he was going to stay with me. Apparently Mari was a
mess. She was all upset, and really really embarrassed since half of our
friends had seen her lying there on the ground with nothing on after having
her boyfriend pound her lover on the bed. That made me feel better, and we
spent some time just dissing her. I felt my anguish come in waves, and the
next one was about to hit. We were laying on my bed so I rolled over, put
my head on Van's chest, and hugged him as tight as I could. I felt the
tears come again, the sobs, and the incredible pain that comes with a
breakup, especially the first breakup. I felt his arms tight around me, and
I just buried my head in his chest. Then I felt something really
surprising. I felt him kissing the top of my head. He brushed away the hair
from my forehead and kissed me again. Just small kisses, tender kisses. I
looked up at him and he kissed me on the mouth in that gentle way that he
had mastered. All thoughts of Mari flew from my head. I felt my dick
harden, my hormones kick in, and I started kissing him back passionately.

His breath tasted like alcohol, and he had a faint smell of body odor from
partying hard all night...the combination was like an aphrodisiac. He
unbuttoned my shirt and started massaging my chest and playing with my
nipples. It felt so good. I pulled his t-shirt up and broke our kiss long
enough to get it off of him. I wanted to feel his skin next to mine. His
hand moved down my stomach to my pants and he squeezed my hard cock through
the material. I moaned, softly at first, then I remembered no one was home,
so I just went for it. That must have really turned him on, because he
jumped out of bed and took of his pants and underwear, as did I, but left
his socks on. God that was sexy. He climbed on top of me like I was a chick
and started fucking away. I wrapped my legs tight around him. I have really
long legs, so I could hook them together and keep us tight against each
other. The feel of his cock rubbing against mine was unbelievable. He had
taken me to this world of ecstasy, with no problems and no hurt feelings. I
was really able to let go, and he got me so hot that I started talking
dirty. "Oh yeah Van, fuck me!" "God your cock feels so good!" I'd never
done that before. I could tell that he liked it though. I was getting
close. Real close. I felt my balls rise, my body tensed...this was gonna be
good. "I'm gonna cum!" I screamed. "Me too," he said, in this raw, sexual,
gutteral voice that just sent me over the edge. It was awesome, we came at
the same time...ramming our bodies against each other....my loud moans and
his intense grunts...It felt like we came forever. Definitely a top 10
orgasm.

He rolled off me and I grabbed my shirt and wiped off all the cum... I
really didn't care if it was ruined or not. I laid on his chest, my
favorite position, and he gently stroked my head, running his fingers
through my hair. We didn't say anything, it was just peaceful time, so
intimate, even more than if we had been talking. I looked up at him and he
had a contented smile on his face. We both drifted off to sleep.

I woke up at 4am...I remember looking over at my clock, and discovered that
I was laying on my side and Van was behind me with his arm wrapped around
me, holding me tight. You'd think that would make me happy, and that I'd be
so thrilled just to lay there with him. But my mind had other ideas. My
process of self-torture was well-honed: No one could make me as miserable
as I could. First, I removed any joy I had being with him by reminding
myself that this was just a fleeting deal. When tomorrow rolled around,
he'd be Tanya's, and off-limits again. I was completely in love with my
best friend, while to him, I was just an occasional sexual release. Then I
started to relive the events of last night, and how horrible I felt about
that. Then I felt like I was sad because our relationship was over, and
that I loved her. In hindsight, I was sad because I had lost a good friend,
one of my best, and even more important at that stage, I was totally
humiliated. I mean, if I was any good in bed, why would my girlfriend fuck
another guy? I had done a good job. The emotional pain was excruciating. I
felt the tears running down my face again. I was hoping that I could just
stop at that, but I couldn't. I broke down again and started sobbing. I
just couldn't help it. I can't even describe how bad it hurt. Of course,
this woke Van up, and he pulled me tightly to him. "It's Ok man, I'm here
for you" he said, stroking my chest and kissing my neck.

The conflicting emotions was extreme. His touch was electric. His kiss was
consuming. But I kept thinking that it wasn't permanent...it was only
fleeting. I felt his hard cock pressing against my ass, He had moved so it
was sliding in my crack, and his pubes would brush against my hole. This
was intense! Then I knew what I wanted. I wanted him to fuck me. I wanted
to feel him inside me. I wanted the same kind of intimacy he had with
Tanya. Sometimes everything you need is right there. For example, the jar
of Vaseline I kept handy was within easy reach, so I grabbed it. I took a
slab of it and reached under my balls to grease up his cock. Damn it was
big. This was a little scary. "What're you doing man?" he asked. I guided
his lubed cock towards my hole, gently squeezing his rock hard head as I
did so. He gasped a little. "Are you sure this is what you want?" he
asked. "Fuck yeah," I said. I rolled over on my stomach with my ass arched
in the air. I felt him stir behind me, and I felt his cock pressing against
my hole. This was gonna hurt. Bad. My ass was resisting, and he said "Mark,
are you sure you want to do this?" and I said "God Damn it, just fuck me!"
in a sexually demanding voice. I felt his huge cock force my hole open. The
pain was excruciating. I thought it would get better, but it just got
worse. He drove his cock inside me, deep inside, and started to fuck me. I
felt like someone was stuffing a small car up my ass. I buried my head in
the pillow and screamed into it. Part of me was praying for this to end,
while the other part of me subconsciously noted that while I was being
fucked, my emotional pain had vanished. I almost made him stop, but he
started talking to me, something he never did during sex, telling me how
good it felt, how tight my ass was, how nothing had ever felt that good. It
didn't take him long to cum, and it was a major thrill to feel his cock
pump a major load in my ass. When he was done, he laid beside me and gently
stroked my back. I was still in pain, I probably wouldn't be able to sit
down for a week, but I had given him what Tanya had...he had fucked me too.

I looked over at him and saw a tear in his eye. Van never, I mean never,
cried. "What's wrong?" I asked. "I hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you,"
he said as the tears flowed. I leaned up and kissed him gently, then wiped
the tears away. "No man, you saved me. I hurt so bad inside, and you made
that go away. That was way more painful." He looked at me a little
dubiously. "Of course, I'm not saying I want to do it again..." I said, and
started laughing. He laughed with me. It was amazing how resilient I was at
15. After that, I the intense emotional pain was gone, replaced by sadness
sometimes, a dull melancholy, but I could deal with that. Hell, Shawn lived
his whole life like that. But I resolved that getting fucked was not
something I wanted to do.

That morning, Aaron's mother called to bitch me out. Apparently his nose
was broken. She was yelling and threatening to sue us. I finally just said
"Did your son tell you he was fucking my girlfriend when I broke his nose"
and hung up. Van had gone home so I just sat there and laughed about it by
myself. Broke his nose. Damn that felt good. I took a shower (damn, my ass
hurt) and was just hanging around the house when the doorbell rang. There
was really no one I wanted to see. It was Van's mom. She can be a pretty
scary lady. She's like from New York or something, where they really know
how to lay into you hard. She demanded to know what happened. Fortunately,
Van was with her. I told her the whole story, what the hell, and it made me
cry again. That was good..got me lots of sympathy. She put her arm around
me and told me not to worry about it, that she'd talk to Aaron's mom. And
then she smiled and asked me to try and stay out of trouble for the rest of
my parent's vacation. According to Van, her conversation with Mrs. Bryce
was legendary, and I'm sure that lady's ears are still burning. In the end,
nothing ever came of her threat to sue me or my parents.