Date: Wed, 28 Aug 2013 20:19:01 -0400
From: Natty <bacteriaburger@gmail.com>
Subject: 691 Suburban Dr Chapter 3

691 Suburban Dr
By Natty Soltesz

 3.

      I listened for the sound of the front door shutting, then watched
from my bedroom window as Jordan slunk into his car and drove away. I sat
at my kitchen table, listening to the soft hum of silence. Mr. Donald crept
out of the carrier and rubbed against my leg, I put my hand down and he
smooshed his face against it. Then I cried.

      "What are you doing for Thanksgiving?" asked Kate the next day, at
work. Kate worked with me in the computer science department, and we'd been
fast friends since my first day.  "Me and Charlie want to have you over."

      "I haven't thought about it," I said, looking up at her, my hand on
my mouse. Kate sat on the edge of my desk. "I guess it's a pretty long
vacation we've got coming up." The University gives us five days off and I
was surprised to find that I wasn't looking forward to it.

      "Not long enough," Kate said. She looked at me. "Oh honey. Are you
worried you'll be lonely?"

      "Yes. It's the first real vacation we've had since Jordan and I broke
up." Jordan - douchebag that he was - had at least been someone to come
home too. We did stuff together - went out to movies, went to thrift
stores, bought groceries. It wasn't a perfect relationship but it was
companionship.

      "Then you're definitely coming over for Thanksgiving and I won't take
no for an answer. Besides, I told Charlie he has to cook in nothing but an
apron." I smiled. I had a total boner for Kate's husband and my attraction
was our little joke.

      So on Thursday I bucked up, made mashed sweet potatoes and brought
them to Kate's house before noon. Charlie, the adorable lunkhead, answered
the door.

      "Hey der Nate," he said, and brought me into a big hug. My skinny
body sunk into his beef and muscle, and I allowed it to feel good. He
smelled like manly deodorant. "Happy Thanksgiving," he said, displaying the
alluring gap between his front teeth.

      "Nate!" Kate said, coming up behind Charlie. I got another big
hug. She got me and Charlie a beer, herself a glass of wine, and we sat at
the table while Charlie navigated his six foot, five inch frame around the
kitchen.

      "I told Charlie to cook naked but he wouldn't," Kate said.

      "It's too cold," Charlie said from the kitchen. He knew I was hot for
him and liked to tease me about it, too.

      "Aw, c'mon Charlie, you know I wouldn't judge you. I know what cold
can do to a man," I said.

      "Nate, you're so crazy," Charlie said, his face going red.

      We ate too much, which is to say exactly enough. Charlie passed out
on the couch in front of the game while Kate and I cleaned up.

      "Have you seen Jordan at all?" she asked me.

      "He stopped by two days ago and gave me the cat."

      "Really?" I put a plate in the rack. She picked it up and swiped it
with a towel.

      "Yeah. And he wanted to have sex with me," I said.

      "Oh my god - did you?"

      "No. Of course not."

      "But you haven't had sex in, like, forever," she said. I glanced at
her.

      "So what?" I said.

      "I mean, I think you did the right thing. I'm just surprised you had
the willpower, I guess."

      "Well to tell you the truth it kind of depressed me. He seems really
lonely. I don't think he'd ever admit it, though."

      "Are you lonely?"

      "Sometimes," I said.

      "Well you're always welcome here," Kate said. "I mean
it. Anytime. Even if I'm not here."

      "You trust me to be alone with Charlie?" I said, smiling.

      "I don't trust you but I trust Charlie," she said. "It's been how
long since you broke up with Jordan? Six months?"

      "Close to that," I said.

      "Do you think you're ready to, like, date?"

      "I don't know. I don't have any interest in going to bars or
anything. I'm just worried about filling up my time over this goddamn work
break."

      "Take a trip," Kate said.

      "Hm?"

      "Go somewhere. You have some money, right? And a car. Drive
somewhere." She grabbed her wine glass from the counter and threw back what
was left in it.

      "Huh," I said. We walked into the living room to where Charlie was
snoring on the couch.

      "If you want to molest him in his sleep I won't tell."

      "Yes you would," I said. I gave her a big kiss on the cheek. "I'm
really glad I came," I said.



      I thought about it – taking a trip. It was just like Kate to pull
something like that out of her ass. And why not? Living with Jordan I'd
been broke most of the time – he barely worked. Now that I was a good
seven months into single-dom I had a bit of money, and a reliable car.

      I waited until I got home. Then I swallowed my anxiety, found in my
phone where Darrin had called, and called him back. A female voice
answered. "Hello?"

      "Um – is Darrin home?" I said.

      "Yeah just a sec – Darrin?"

      His girlfriend? His wife? The first thing I thought was that she knew
who I was – that Darrin must have told her about me. There was a
familiarity in her tone, a comfort.

      "Hello?" Darrin's voice.

      "Hey Darrin."

      "Aww shit," he said, laughing. I laughed too, but my heart was in my
throat. The fact of the matter was that I'd fallen in love with Darrin,
once upon a time in college, and had spent some time extricating myself
from that. There was a kernel of fear in my mind that talking to him could
bring all those feelings back.

      "Dude, you called me back," he said. I could see him, his black
skater-boy hair, and joker's grin. "I didn't think you would."

      "Sorry it took me so long," I said. Deep breath.

      "Nah, dude, it's cool. What have you been up to? I haven't talked to
you in like six years." He laughed and the sound of it made me feel like
I'd made the right decision. I told him the usual - working, getting
by. "The reason I called is, I was talking to Randy the other day."

      "No shit," I said.

      "Yeah."

      "He's living out in Boston, right?"

      "Yeah. He's doing alright. We were talking about you, though." His
voice lowered when he said that, in an intriguing way.

      "Really?"

      "Yeah," Darrin said, laughing in a way that let me know exactly what
he was laughing about. "You know...we had some good times back in the day."

      "We did, man. So...who answered the phone?"

      "That's Fallon. My girlfriend." He said they lived together and had
been going out for the past two years. "I own a house out here, dude."

      "Where are you?'"

      "Philly. Well, not really Philly. The suburbs."

      "Right on."

      "I was telling Fallon about you."

      "Oh yeah?"

      "Yeah." There was a pause. "Just how good of friends we all used to
be."

      "Cool."

      "She wants to meet you."

      "Awesome."

      "So are you coming out here, dude?"

      When I left to leave the next day, bags packed and heart steeled for
whatever might come at it, my reliable car didn't start. When I had it
towed and the mechanic said it was going to take at least four days to get
it going, I observed my disappointment and relished my relief.

      "Dude that sucks," Darrin said when I broke the news. "Christmas
then? Do you have plans?"

      "I don't, in fact," I said. My parents were going to Costa Rica and
while my sister had invited me to her house in DC to have Christmas with
her Republican husband and four terrible children, I couldn't think of
anything I wanted to do less.

      "It's a plan then. Fallon's family is in California and we don't feel
like traveling to see mine. We're just gonna be doing our own thing and
it'd be better with you here. We can check out Philly. Party –
whatever."

      It all worked out for the best, anyway, because I ended up really
enjoying myself over vacation. I didn't do a whole hell of a lot – I
didn't have a car after all – but I watched bad movies and read The
Secret History by Donna Tartt late into the night because I couldn't put
the damned thing down. I started writing in my journal again, spending
hours at this pretty cool coffee shop down the street from my place. It was
good to know that I could be alright alone.

      Also, I got horny, for the first time since...well, certainly since
the breakup, and maybe a good while before that.

      So I wound up perusing the personals on Craigslist. Almost every
other ad on there was from a guy who said he was straight. I answered an ad
for a guy who wanted his ass eaten out – just that, nothing else, and
only because "chicks won't do it so I may as well try a guy."

      I didn't believe it, but it gave me a boner. He asked for a pic in my
response. I was going to pull one off of Facebook but I realized I didn't
have any that made me look sexy.

      So I spent a half hour in my bathroom with my shirt off, taking
pictures of myself in the mirror. I got a good one of my flexing my bicep
but I felt stupid about it so I put my shirt back on and got one of me just
looking normal - normal but well lit. I even took a lamp from my desk and
used it as a key light to give my skin just the right glow.

      Nobody ever said getting laid was easy, even in the digital age where
sex seems as easy to order up as a mushroom pizza.

      I sent my pic to the ass-eating guy and while I waited for a response
I went on Huffington Post and read an editorial by Rita Rudner that I
instantly forgot, then somebody on Facebook posted a clip of Whoopi
Goldberg farting on `The View,' so I watched that and felt curiously empty
as a result.

      When I checked my email account I had a response from `J.D.',
subject: "Re: Lick ass."

      It said: "Ad clearly stated bi or str8 only, and you're clearly gay."

      I shut down my computer and jacked off to the Falcon DVD I've been
keeping in my sock drawer for the last ten years.



***

      Darrin emailed me his address the week before Christmas. I plugged it
into Google and it came up on the satellite view. His house was in a
subdivision with roads that curved in flowing patterns. Beyond the
subdivision were acres of green, wilderness, and I wondered about it.

      It was a five-hour drive, and I did manage to get my nut off before I
arrived, at a truck stop no less. It was just a gravel pull-off for trucks
on the side of the interstate. I got out to pee but when I noticed dirt
paths leading up into the woods I got intrigued. I followed one. I ran into
a couple guys shuffling around and got the idea.

      To be honest, it gave me an instant boner. I'd never done anything
like it before, and wondered why not. There was nothing keeping me from
trying it. A relatively handsome, beefy trucker nodded at me. He had his
jacked unzipped and the top two buttons of his plaid shirt were undone to
show his hairy chest. I nodded back and he pawed my crotch, then knelt down
in the dirt, took out my cock, and slipped it in his mouth.

      I was turned on but nervous and wasn't going to cum. He stood up,
smiling and affable. "Nice cock," he said in a deep, quiet voice.

      "Thanks," I said. He undid his pants so I could see his full-packed
jockstrap. With his hands roaming all over my body I jacked my dick.

      "Cum on my jock," he said. That was all I needed. I pointed my prick
at his cup and blasted away onto the nubby off-white fabric. When I was
done he zipped right up. He gave me a peck on the lips and said "You're
sexy." I told him he was, too. I got back to my car and drove away,
thinking how funny it is to be gay sometimes.

      There was a wood-cut sign at the entrance to Hidden Grove, Darrin's
subdivision, that depicted a stand of pine trees under a round gray
moon. The actual trees that lined the streets were only saplings that had
while to go before they formed anything like a grove, let alone one that
was hidden. Finally I turned onto Darrin's street, Suburban Drive, a name
that seemed so beside the point and redundant that it made me wonder if the
developers had had a sense of humor. The houses looked so similar that I
had to turn around twice before I found Darrin's house. I parked on the
street. The door to the house opened and Darrin stood in the doorway,
smiling.

      "Dude." I held out my hand. "Fuck that," he said and pulled me into a
big hug.

      "You look good," I said. He did. His once-rail-thin skater boy body
had some mass and thickness to it, but his eyes were still gleaming and
young, his dark hair thick and sexy. And yeah, I'd felt the bulge in his
pants pressing against mine, and it was a good reminder of what he still
possessed down there.

      "You have any trouble getting here?"

      "Nope."

      "Fallon's at work but she'll be back around five." He gave me the
tour. "I bought this place a year ago. It's closer to work." He was doing
graphic design and tech stuff for an upstart ad agency. He took me upstairs
to his office which was pure Darrin – anime posters on the wall,
complicated looking computer parts and cords strewn over bookshelves and in
boxes. "This is Fallon," he said, handing me a framed photo.

      It was of a blue-eyed redhead posing goofy-seductive in the
woods. There was a fire pit in the background. She looked familiar to
me. "Did you guys meet in State University?"

      "No, she's from Santa Cruz. California."

      "Oh, that's where you moved out of college, right?"

      "Yeah but we didn't meet out there, weirdly enough. We met here, at
work – well, she used to work there. She works for a nonprofit now." I
set the picture on the shelf. She wore tight shorts and her legs looked
large and strong.

      "How long have you guys lived together?"

      "Since I bought this house," Darrin said. "The lease was up on her
place so it worked out." I nodded, sipping the beer Darrin had handed me
downstairs.

      "She's kinda hot," I said, and I meant it. There was
something...sturdy about her. She looked built to last.

      "Dude, you have no idea," he said, lowering his head. "She can't wait
to meet you."

      "Yeah?"

      "Yeah." We heard the front door open.

      "I'm home," said a female voice.

      "Come on," Darrin said, and took me by the hand as he led me to the
stairs.

      Fallon had her arms full of packages, one hand carrying a
plastic-wrapped tray of cookies. She kicked the door and it closed with a
satisfying slam.

       "Hey baby," she said, leaning forward to give Darrin a peck on the
lips. She set the packages on the floor. "And you must be Nate," she
said. I shook her hand. "Nice to finally meet you," she said.

      "You too," I said. "Cookies," I said, nodding toward her other hand.

      "I know, right?" She handed the tray to me and shrugged off her
coat. "We had our holiday party at work today. Andrea made like fourteen
fucking dozen, I don't know who she expected to eat them all." Her sweater
was tight and I couldn't help but notice that she had nice, perky tits. "I
need a drink."

      We followed Fallon into the kitchen. I set the cookie tray on the
counter. Fallon reached into the cabinet to grab a bottle of liquor and
Darrin came up and embraced her from behind. She turned, liquor bottle in
hand, and kissed him deeply, her hands sliding down his lower back to grab
his ass. Darrin did the same, giving her cute butt a tight squeeze before
breaking off. They gave me quick, sheepish grins. I sucked on my beer and
looked to the floor.

      We ordered a pizza for dinner and Darrin procured a joint for dessert
which we smoked in the living room. Darrin and Fallon were on the couch,
Fallon with her legs thrown over Darrin's lap.

       "So Nate, Darrin's told me a lot about you. About when you guys were
in college and lived together."

      "Oh yeah?" I said, my breath catching. I was high and this felt like
treacherous territory, considering all the big, gay sex I'd had with Darrin
back in the day.

      "Yeah," Fallon said, looking me right in the eye.

      "Hard to remember those days," I said. "It's been a while."

      "Oh I don't know. It sounded pretty memorable," Fallon said. Darrin
rolled his eyes.

      "How much did you tell her?" I asked Darrin.

      "Everything," Fallon replied.

      "Really?"

	"Dude, she plies me for details on a regular basis," Darrin said. I
ran my hand through my hair, unsure of what to say.

      "It's cool," Fallon said. "I know Darrin's bi. Or whatever he
is. Frankly, I think it's sexy. But now that you're here I'm gonna ply you
for details."

      "Okay," I said.

      "Eventually," Fallon said.

      "Let's watch a movie," Darrin said, and I was grateful for the change
of subject. The fact that Darrin had told his girlfriend, apparently in
great detail, about all the dude sex he'd had in college was surprising
enough, let alone the fact that he considered himself bi, "or whatever."
For all I knew he could still be having dude sex. Were they swingers?
Clearly something was going on.

      We watched Iron Man which was better than I thought it was going to
be. I was tired from the drive and passed out soon after in Darrin's guest
bedroom.

      The next morning Fallon drove us to Philly proper and we did touristy
stuff since I'd never been there before: bell, courthouse. We got some
Middle Eastern food for lunch despite Darrin's disapproval.

      "Thank god you're here, Nate," Fallon said, taking my arm as we made
our way back to the car after we ate. "We can't leave the house without
Darrin dragging me to a fucking Italian restaurant."

      "Whatever. We went to that Japanese place last month," Darrin said.

      "Where you ordered steak and a baked potato," Fallon said, leveling
her eyes.

      "At least it doesn't smell like he uses his deep fryer anymore," I
said.

      "I need a new one," Darrin said.

      "He used it constantly when we lived together. You breathed grease in
that place," I said.

      "Meat and potatoes," Fallon said, hugging my arm closer. Darrin got
on the other side of me and shoved his body playfully against my
shoulder. It felt good and natural, this physicality. Fallon smelled fresh
and girly from perfume or shampoo. "He has no sense of adventure. Well, at
least not where food is concerned. But I guess you know that."

      I took a deep breath, still not quite ready to navigate those waters.

      Darrin stopped at the beer distributor on the way home and bought a
case of beer, then we picked up a box of wine for Fallon. "It's Friday,"
Darrin said. "Gotta get down on Friday."

      The sky was darkening as we drove into Hidden Grove. "We call it
Monopolyville," Fallon said as we passed row after row of identical boxy
houses. "It's not bad though. Mostly families. Everything does their own
thing. Nobody bothers us."

      We played cards. I was getting drunk and feeling good. There was an
ease to my friendship with Darrin that I'd forgotten about in the midst of
all the old sexual tension. I had a connection with him, and as I've gotten
older I've come to realize that those connections you have with certain
people, which seem abundant when you're young, are actually rare.

      That feeling extended to Fallon. Conversation flowed easily in all
directions. We were getting a little toasted.

       "Nate, for a guy who supposedly doesn't know how to play poker,
you're surprisingly good at winning," Fallon said.

      "Beginner's luck," I said, raking in the pot.

      "Look at the grin on the little shit," Fallon said to Darrin. I
grinned wider and stuck my tongue between my teeth.

      "We'll get him back," Darrin said.

      "Yeah, or let's raise the stakes," Fallon said.

      "Strip poker?" I suggested. Fallon shrugged. Darrin laughed.

      "So Nate..." Fallon said. "When was the last time you and Darrin had
sex?"

      "Talk about raising the stakes," I said.

      "It was gonna happen eventually," Darrin said. "She can't get enough
of it."

      "It doesn't make you uncomfortable, does it?" Fallon said.

      "No," I said, squirming in my chair.

      "Yeah you look really comfortable," Darrin said.

      "It...it was just a really long time ago. And I haven't even really
discussed it with Darrin."

      "What's there to discuss?" Darrin said.

      "I guess nothing."

      "So when was the last time?" Fallon said again. She nibbled the edge
of a poker chip. I looked at Darrin. We waxed thoughtful.

      "At least seven years," I said.

      "The last time had to be in the apartment we lived in above Uncle
Jimmy's."

      "But you don't remember the exact last time?" Fallon said. "C'mon,
Nate, I know you must remember."

      "I do," I said. "But I don't really want to talk about it." Fallon
nodded. Darrin shuffled the cards. "So Darrin's told you a lot, has he?" I
said. Fallon nodded, the smile returning to her face. "What was your
favorite story?"

      "Well..." Fallon said. Darrin dealt the cards. "I think what sticks
out in my mind the most is how all you guys would kind of fuck each other
and take turns with it...like it was real egalitarian, or whatever."

      "It's true," I said. "It was very democratic."

      "An equal-opportunity environment for ass sex," Darrin agreed. Fallon
left the room and returned with a full glass of red wine.

      "So how'd you guys meet?" I said.

      "He didn't tell you?" Fallon said.

      "He said you met at work." Darrin sat back and took a long sip of his
beer. "Didn't you?" I asked.

      "No, we did. We knew each other from work, anyway. But that's not how
we met," Fallon said. "We met on a website. On a kink website, actually."

      "Alt dot com," Darrin said.

      "Really?" I said, raising my eyebrow.

      "Yeah," Fallon said, meeting my gaze.

      "We hooked up and afterwards I was like, don't I know you from work?"
Darrin said.

      "We didn't even work on the same floor so we didn't know each other
that well, but it was still a pretty freaky coincidence."

      "Alt dot com, huh?" I said.

      "Tell him what brought us together, Darrin," Fallon said. Darrin
squirmed.

      "I was looking for a dominant girl," he said, looking at Fallon. He
smiled big. "It said on her profile that she gave a good spanking." Fallon
nodded.

      "Does she?" I asked, though I kind of already suspected. Fallon
seemed like she'd know how to dominate a guy.

      "She does," Darrin said.

      "Wow, Darrin," I said. "I had no idea you were so kinky."

      "Neither did I," he said. "But it seems like the older I get the less
I'm afraid to explore this stuff."

      "That's how I got Darrin to tell me about all the gay sex he had back
in college, I spanked it out of him," Fallon said, a gleam in her eye. "But
he got into telling me about when he found out how much it turned me on."

      "It does turn you on, doesn't it? Gay sex, I mean."

      "Mm hm," Fallon said into her wine glass. Awkward silence, then
Fallon set down her glass. "You know, Nate, let's just get it all out on
the table." Darrin slid back in his chair, eyes on Fallon. "You've probably
guessed at this point that Darrin and I didn't invite you out here with the
purest of intentions."

      "Well..." Darrin said.

      "Not that we don't like you," Fallon added.

      "Obviously I wanted to see you again, that's the most important
thing. You're my buddy and I wanted to catch up," Darrin said.

      "Okay," I said. "I can appreciate impure intentions. I mean, I've
always known Darrin was a little freaky, and it hasn't taken long to figure
out that you guys are, too."

      "Good," Fallon said. "Because, basically, Darrin and are both into
the idea of messing around with a bi guy."

      "Okay," I said. "But...I'm not bi."

      "Right," Darrin said.

      "We know that," Fallon added. "It's just that we've tried before?
Like, with guys off Craigslist? And it's been...supremely
disappointing. And knowing the history you've had with Darrin, we thought
you might be interested in...exploring with us a little. A no-pressure kind
of thing."

      "We want somebody we feel comfortable with," Darrin said. I took a
deep breath, unable to ignore the giant red neon lit sign in my mind that
flashed PUSSY ALERT! PUSSY ALERT! Not that I was afraid of pussy,
necessarily, but it did provoke anxiety. Plus there was the fact that I'd
never been attracted to girls. Or pussy.

      I couldn't think of a way to express this without sounding insulting.

      "Here's the thing: we're just friends for now," Darrin said. I
listened closely. "That's what this visit is about. We have no interest in
making you feel uncomfortable."

      "Yeah if you decide it's something you don't want to do then that's
it, end of story. We stay friends. I mean, I feel good about us being
friends, you know? I wouldn't want to mess that up," Fallon said.

      "That's first and foremost," Darrin added.

      "Thanks for that," I said. "I can't say I'm not interested."

      "It'd be your show," Fallon said. "We decided that. I mean, we'd
obviously have to discuss between us if we'd feel comfortable exploring
anything you might propose. And we could certainly propose ideas. But
ultimately, it'd be your thing. Does that make sense?"

      "Yes. I like that," I said. The truth was I was already getting
ideas. The thought of watching them fuck entered my mind. I thought that I
would like that very much. In fact, I started to get a hard on.

      "Good," Darrin said. "Let's sleep on it?"

      "Okay," I said. Fallon nodded. We were all on the level. More than
I'd realized, in fact. Darrin got up to heat some spinach and artichoke
dip, and the boner in his shorts was quite apparent. Fallon saw me looking
and gave me a wink.

***

More stories on my website: http://nattysoltesz.com/stories

Email me: bacteriaburger@gmail.com

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http://www.queeryoungcowboys.com/shop/691-suburban-dr/