Date: Mon, 16 Sep 2013 22:04:02 +0000
From: David Lee <dlee169@hotmail.com>
Subject: Banana Splits

The following is a short story about a young man finding himself.  There is
no explicit sex, but sufficient innuendo.  Of course, if you're not
considered old enough to read things on this site, you should leave
immediately.  If not, stick around and enjoy.  It's only about 10 pages
long.

If you do like it, I'd appreciate hearing from you.  You may contact me at
dlee169@hotmail.com.  Please put the title in the subject line so I'll see
it if your email ends up in the spam box.

To read more of my tales, you need to look under my name in the Nifty list
of authors.

Banana Splits

A short story by David Lee

Scott sat bolt upright in bed, his heart pounding, having awakened from a
bad dream.  He couldn't remember the details, but he seemed to have been
trapped in a massive spider web and bound securely with sticky fibers,
conscious but unable to move or call out for help.  The huge black widow
had a familiar human face.  Although he knew it was only a dream, he
shivered in the early morning light.

He thought his sudden movements might have disturbed his best buddy who had
stayed over to be his support.  But Ryan roused slightly in bed next to
him, turned over, and went back to sleep, apparently as carefree as a baby.
Scott envied him.

Today was one of the days he'd been dreading for several months.  Today his
family and hers would meet to discuss the final arrangements, making sure
all was in order before mailing the invitations in another week.  Short of
a miraculous intervention, his doom would be sealed in June.

----------

Scott thought back about his relationship with the sleeping form beside
him.  They had been best friends for as long as he could remember.  They
had done all the things little boys did, from catching frogs for scaring
the girls with, to comparing their boy parts.  They had often spent
overnights together, sleeping in the same bed, telling ghost stories, and
confiding secrets.

Getting caught touching one another's little dick had been an especially
scary time for them.  They must have been about five years old when they
went behind a tree in Ryan's backyard to pee and ended up experimenting.

Ryan's father had been furious and spanked Ryan's bare butt soundly before
sending him crying to his room.

With the threat of a similar punishment hanging over his head, Scott had
trudged home to face his father.

"What's up, Sport?" Richard had asked when the boy dragged into the house.

"Um, did Ryan's dad call you?"

"Yes."

"Am I getting a spanking?"

"For what?"

"For touching his wee-wee?"

"No, that's not a terrible thing to do.  All boys are curious; that's how
they learn.  In the future, just be careful to check if anyone's around
before you show it off.  Some adults don't understand."

"I love you, Daddy!"

"I love you too, Scotty."

That had been the end of it from Scott's perspective, but Ryan's father had
banned him from sleeping over for several months.  In fact, it wasn't until
after the untimely accident that took Ryan's father's life that they slept
together again.  When they at last did, Ryan cried a lot and Scott held him
most of the night.

Through their teen years, they were as close as twin brothers.  Where one
was, the other would never be far away.  Their classmates referred to them
as Batman and Robin, except for one would-be bully who called them, Rat-man
and Bobbin.  His futile attempts to tease them never worked because they
simply laughed them off, and he eventually gave up.

With the onset of puberty, they explored things that made them feel
wonderful and guilty at the same time.  Both were quite innocent because
their mothers refused to allow them to be in sex education sessions at
school.

Richard, however, took Scott fishing one Saturday afternoon and explained
the facts of life to him.  Scott was initially embarrassed, but soon came
to realize he was being gently ushered into the world of adult males and he
began to ask questions.  Without a hint of discomfiture, his father
answered frankly, even explaining slang terms as well as the textbook ones.
Scott shared the information with Ryan immediately, so they both received a
pretty sound education in sexual matters despite their mothers' attempts to
keep them in the dark.

By high school, boys in their circle were expected to start dating.  They
were supposed to pursue girls, but stop short of having sex with them,
especially if they weren't protected.  Getting a girl pregnant was one of
the cardinal sins in their church and was frowned upon by the community in
general.  But some parents turned a blind eye to premarital sex as long as
their kids didn't get caught by the stork.

Neither boy could understand all the fuss about going out with a girl.
They had no plans to get naked and have sex with them.  Holding hands was
okay, but not a big deal.  As a consequence, Scott never had a real date
until his senior prom, and that went no further than holding hands and
kissing – neither of which excited him all that much.

In the mean time, his mother had begun to fret, saying to Richard that she
feared Scott might be gay because he wasn't going out with girls all the
time.

"It's not our place to tell him what he is or isn't, and we shouldn't force
him to date," he had said.  "Kids often rebel when something is crammed
down their throats.  Let nature take its course."

Eventually, Scott gave in to the societal pressures exerted by his mother
and her friend, Marlys.  Marlys's daughter, Julie, was decent enough
looking and had a pleasant, though somewhat pushy demeanor.  As soon as she
and Scott started to date, he became her trophy.  She paraded him in front
of all her friends, almost like a purebred pup at the Westminster Dog Show.

Scott resigned himself to his fate during his junior year in college and
had proposed to her at Christmas time that year.

Ryan had somehow resisted his mother's coercion, remaining single in every
sense of the word.  He was certainly desirable in the eyes of the coeds in
his classes, but he managed to stave off their advances in a light-hearted
manner that allowed them to stay friends, but with boundaries.

----------

Scott's mind was jolted back to the present when Ryan poked him in the
ribs.

"Hey Bud, you look like a man facing the guillotine!  This is supposed to
be a big day for you; not as big as June 10th, but still..."

"You'll stay by my side today, right?"

"Sure.  That's what a best man is for.  If her brothers try to keep you
from getting her, I'll use my club to bash them over the head so we can
carry Julie off," Ryan joked.

"If only they would try," Scott mumbled.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Are you getting cold feet?"

"I'm having some serious thoughts... ."

"What's going on?  You've dated Julie since the first year of college and
you've taken your time giving her the ring."

"It's silly, but I had a powerful dream and it's scared the crap out of me.
I wonder if it's an omen."

Scott proceeded to share his vivid nightmare as Ryan listened intently and
frowned during the narration.

"If this were Old Testament times, someone like Joseph would interpret it
for you and the explanation might cause you to run off to the land of Nod,
somewhere east of Eden," Ryan grinned, in a jumble of biblical trivia.

"Maybe I should do that," Scott sighed.

"C'mon Dude, you'll feel better after I make you one of my famous omelets.
You do have eggs and stuff in the fridge, right?  By the way, I like this
apartment.  The kitchen is really well laid out, and that loft for a
computer room or extra sleeping space is REALLY cool.  Are you going to
live together before you tie the knot?"

"There would be hell to pay if I even suggested it!  You know how strict
her father is.  I wouldn't dare, even if we slept in separate bedrooms."

----------

Scott did indeed feel better after having breakfast.  Ryan was a great cook
and would make someone a perfect mate.  He was also a lucky guy because he
hadn't become ensnared in the sticky web from which there seemed to be no
escape.

Musing on that made Scott feel glum again.  Ryan sensed his mood and
attempted to lighten it.

"Just think, in another year you'll be bouncing a baby on your knee and
starting to make another one.  Her parents are really into that `be
fruitful and multiply' bit in Genesis."

"Man, don't remind me!  I'll be supporting children for the next 25 years."

"But, you love kids."

"I do, but not a whole houseful.  Sheesh!"

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry I brought it up.  It's not like you to be so
negative."

"I know.  I'm sorry.  Guess I'd better go face the Spanish Inquisition."

----------

Marlys and Shelly had hashed out all the details about flowers, candles,
and colors for the umpteenth time when Marlys, brought up another subject
which she felt needed airing.

"I hope you haven't talked to all you groomsmen about being in the
wedding," she said to Scott.  "I'm comfortable with Ryan as your best man,
but I feel Jamal would be out of place in our church."

"You disapprove of my buddy because of the color of his skin?" Scott
frowned.

"No, it's just that he's so, uh, out there.  He comes off like he's a
friend of Ellen DeGeneres, if you know what I mean.  He's likely to show up
in gold lamé pants instead of a black tux."

"He IS a free spirit, but he promised to keep it toned down. I think he's a
cool dude.  After Ryan, he's probably my best friend."

"Well, he's a bad influence on you and he simply isn't suitable," Marlys
insisted.  "Our son, James, would be willing to fill in."

"Have you made deposits on everything yet?" Scott asked suddenly.

"No.  We've reserved the church, but there's no cost on that.  We have to
send a $200 deposit to the caterer by Monday along with a fairly accurate
estimate of the number of guests to reserve her services.  Why do you care?
Shelly and I are taking care of all of that."

"Julie, I need to speak with you in private." Scott requested.

"We don't have anything to discuss that can't be said in front of
everyone," Julie asserted firmly, fearing where this might be leading.

"Okay, I had planned to break it to you first, but since that's how you
want it, here goes.

I'm calling the wedding off."

"You can't do that!" Marlys exclaimed.  "It's all planned and everyone
knows about it.  What will people think?"

"I really don't give a rat's butt what people think.  You can have the
wedding if you find a groom in time, because I'm not going to be in it!"

"But what if I'm expecting?" Julie stated.  "You'll have to marry me."

"What's been going on?" her father demanded.

"If she's pregnant it's either an immaculate conception or she's been
screwing around behind my back.  I'm a virgin; I can't vouch for her!"

"Watch your mouth, young man!  It's my little girl you're talking about."

"Okay, calm down and let's be reasonable." Marlys suggested.  "We can
compromise.  I'll let Jamal be in the wedding if you agree to go ahead with
the rest of the plans as they are."

"No!" Scott yelled.  "You'll LET him be in the wedding?  You can't tell me
what friends I can have!  I don't need your permission!  I'm through,
finished, done!  Unless you can put a shotgun to her lover's back, you'd
better un-reserve the church and all the rest."

"I'm not pregnant.  I was just saying what if I were," Julie sniffled.

"Evidently you don't love me!  Ryan's probably talked you into this.  He's
always been jealous."

"Ryan never advised me against getting married, though maybe he should
have.  He simply let me talk while he listened and tried to cheer me up.
If your mother is trying to run our lives already, imagine how it would be
after we were married and had a family.

Now I get the significance of my dream," he said to Ryan.

"We can elope.  I'll do whatever you want," Julie continued. "I have too
much time and energy invested to lose you."

"Time and energy, where's the love?  I feel like an object instead of a
human being.  For those of you who are hard of hearing, or hard of
understanding, I'll say it one more time, `I am NOT getting married' and
that's final!"

"Here's your dumb ring back, jerk!" Julie hissed as she threw it at him.

Scott caught the diamond one-handed and hurried out the front door, closely
followed by Ryan and Richard.

"Dad, I'm sorry, but there is nothing you can say..."

"I can't even congratulate you?"

"Huh?"

"I know you reached adulthood a few years ago, but today you really became
a man!  I'm so glad you didn't make a very bad mistake, Scotty."

"I love you Dad," Scott cried as he embraced his father.

"Please drive me home; I want to talk with Ryan and you.  I'll leave our
car for your mother."

----------

Scott's mother came home to find him with his father, Ryan, and brother,
Brennan, seated around the kitchen table.  Each had a small glass
containing about a half inch of amber liquid.

"What on earth is going on here?  You said that whiskey was for medicinal
purposes!  You're all drunk!"

"No one is drunk, Shelly.  It's at least half ice.  We did need a little
dose of medicine after that scene.  I'll bet you could use one too."

"Booze will never touch my lips!  Besides, Brennan isn't old enough to
drink."

"He's 20 for Lord's sake so he's probably tasted it a number of times
before.  It's not like he's going to be driving anywhere.  This is male
bonding, and besides we've only drunk one toast."

"Why would you be drinking a toast?  This is no time to celebrate!  We have
to talk to Scott about apologizing to Marlys and making peace with the
whole family.  He'll have a hard time repairing all the damage.  I'm sure
this will be all over church if we don't!"

"We're celebrating Scott's manhood.  Today he found his balls!" Richard
proclaimed loudly.

"That's disgusting!"

"No, it's wonderful and it's about time."

"Dad, why didn't you tell me I was making a big mistake?"

"It wasn't for me to say, Son.  Each man has to work out his own destiny.
I could have given my opinion, but it would likely have made you more
determined to marry her.  I'm sure it would be okay if you were marrying
Julie alone instead of the whole family – especially the Bitch of
Buchenwald!

"Richard Carnes, you can't act like this.  I have half a mind to leave
you!"

"You are NOT my mother, Shelly, and even if you were, you wouldn't have the
right to tell me, as an adult, how to act.  When you find the other half of
your mind, let me know if you're serious about leaving so I'll know where
to send your things."

----------

"You're not going to divorce her are you?" Scott asked after his mother had
flounced out of the room.

"Probably not, but I really don't care a lot at this point.  She pulls that
crap every time we disagree over anything and I'm sick of it, so I'm
calling her bluff.  If she wants out, I'm not going to stop her."

"I feel like I've messed everyone up." Scott shook his head slowly.

"Not at all, Son; many things have festered for a long time and it's only
healthy to lance the wounds and squeeze out the pus every so often."

"Eew!" Scott exclaimed, "That's gross!"

"Hey, I said `squeeze' not `suck'!"

That set the guys giggling like a bunch of school girls.

"Who'll eat pizza if I send out for it?" Richard asked.  "I've worked up
quite an appetite and it's after lunchtime already."

----------

"I suppose I should be going home," Ryan said as he and Scott lounged in
the apartment in the late afternoon.

"What's the rush?  Your mom's basement can't have that much appeal for
you."

"That's for sure!"

"I have a pound of ground beef in the fridge.  We could fire up the grill
and make hamburgers.  There're chips in the cupboard and a package of salad
mix in the fridge."

"Okay, you've convinced me."

"Can you stay the night?"

"Of course, if you want my company."

----------

Sunday afternoon, Scott hosted a little party for the guys he was closest
to.  Several would have been in the wedding, and the rest were good buds
who would have been invited to the ceremony and reception.

His text message had called it a banana split social, and all the guests
were curious about the title.

"Have you heard about the changes in my wedding plans?" he asked when all
of them who could make it had arrived.

They all said they hadn't heard anything.  Evidently, Julie and her family
weren't ready to face the world with the news and were keeping a tight lid
on it.

"The significance of this event is that my banana and I have split with
Julie and there will be no wedding.  I didn't want you guys to hear a
warped version from the gossip mill.  It was my doing; I'm the one who
called it off.  I felt trapped!  Everyone was running my life without my
permission!"

"Good for you," Jamal grinned. "I've met her mother, and to meet her is to
dislike her!"

Several others murmured their agreement.

"We should celebrate with a bottle!" Jim suggested.

"We're celebrating with ice cream because I don't want to have to put up a
bunch of guys who would get too stinko to drive home," Scott said, raising
his left eyebrow.

"Okay, I know who you're talking about," Jim blushed.  "So how does this
work?"

"Come to the kitchen," Scott invited.  "We have more than a dozen bananas
so you can have one apiece.  I bought chocolate, vanilla, black walnut, and
strawberry ice cream.  You'll find Reddi wip, shredded coconut, chocolate
syrup, Marciano cherries, and sprinkles for toppings."

"I'm going to make a masterpiece," Jamal declared.  "Watch this with envy!"

He started with two scoops of chocolate ice cream on one edge of the
plastic plate.  Then he sliced off one end of a large banana at an angle
and propped it up against the ice cream.  In addition, he smeared syrup
over the banana, darkening it.  He placed a cherry at the tip of the banana
and proceeded to squirt an ample load of the fake whipped cream on the
other end of the plate with a trail leading up to the cherry.

Everyone knew what he was doing even before he spread the coconut around
like pubic hair.

All the guys snickered.

"I present this to DeWayne hoping he will love munching on it."

"Thanks, I will treasure the taste it!" DeWayne grinned as he put the plate
near his face and licked the entire length of the banana.  "I'm gonna take
your cherry next."

The innuendos became thicker than the dessert toppings as the guys all got
into the spirit of it.  Doubtless, several were feeling horny if the bulges
in their jeans meant anything.  One guy actually winced when DeWayne bit
off the end of the banana.

Soon everyone was trying to equal Jamal's creation, but without much
success.  They had to admit he was the "artiste."

----------

"That was a roaring success," Ryan grinned as he helped Scott clean up
after the others had departed.  "We all got silly even cold sober."

"Thanks for coming up with the idea.  I feel a LOT better.  Now my major
worry is to decide how I can keep this apartment on one salary."

"You could take in a couple of roommates," Ryan suggested.  "I heard Jamal
and DeWayne talking about finding a place together.  After that display
today, I doubt they'd need more than one bed."

"Move in with me Ryan."

"Um, I'm not sure that would be a good idea," Ryan said, studying the
pattern in the vinyl.

"You know we're compatible."

"Our mothers will be upset because everyone at church will talk."

"Who gives a shit?  I'm never darkening the door of that place again."

"But..." Ryan began to protest as he looked into Scott's eyes.

They stood there gazing for several seconds before Scott pulled Ryan into
his arms and kissed him tenderly.  Then they spent several minutes kissing
hungrily.

"Damn!" Scott exclaimed when they came up for air.  "I never knew kissing
could feel like that!  Oh God, I love you Ryan!"

"I never thought this day would come," Ryan smiled through his tears.
"I've always loved you."

Needless to say, when Ryan went home to his mother's after work on Monday,
it was only to pack his things.

----------------------------------End------------------------------------

I hope you enjoyed this little fantasy.  Here is a link which might
interest you:

http://freedhearts.wordpress.com/2013/04/22/what-do-you-do-when-your-son-is-gay/