Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 00:15:51 EST
From: RitchChristopher@cs.com
Subject: briarwood:i-will-lift-up-mine-eyes-77

All rights reserved. Copyright held by the author. If you are underage or
are offended by gay fiction, containing graphic sex and explicit language,
please exit now.


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                                   "BRIARWOOD"
                             Copyright Ritchris, 2005

                           aka "Whence Cometh My Help"
                             Copyright Ritchris, 2003

                                Revised Version

                                A dramatic saga

                                      by

			        Ritch Christopher

                                  <><><><><>

		   	          BOOK SEVEN


                            "I WILL LIFT UP MINE EYES"

			      Chapter-Seventy-seven


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	After nearly a three hour discussion, Tom, Mike, and Jake all
agreed that it was best to tell Lee about his dad's death. It was just a
matter of deciding whether to relate the news to him over the phone, or
drive to Dallas and tell him in person at the hospital. They opted for the
latter, so Tom volunteered to drive to Dallas while Mike stayed in Fort
Stockton to keep Jake from being by himself.

	Privately, Tom suggested to Mike that he and Jake spend the night
in the RV. Tom didn't believe in ghosts, but if there was ever one to
appear, it would be Reverend Malone's in his old dilapidated house. Mike
had already said to Tom that the homestead looked haunted the first time
the two of them entered it. Besides, the Winnebago was modern and cheery,
filled with the latest conveniences and many novel things to distract Jake,
in case he became sad and morose over his dad's death.

	Jake still hadn't shed a tear or even looked sad for that
matter. He seemed more enthused about being able to watch satellite TV and
the adult channels than thinking about his future and what was going to
happen to him should Mike and Tom leave him to go off on their planned
itinerary.

	If Lee decided to return to Fort Stockton for the funeral, Tom
looked forward to having a long talk with him to discuss his treatment at
the hospital and, just as important, what to do about Jake.

	Tom fixed dinner for Mike, Jake, and himself. He cooked enough to
last for another meal if he had to stay longer in Dallas, depending on what
step of treatment the hospital was administering to Lee. Tom felt as if it
were fate that he had rented the SUV earlier in the day. The Toyota would
be pleasant to drive under the night Texas sky where every star in six
universes could be seen on a clear night.

	Mike, on the other hand, was running titles of DVD's through his
mind, films for him and Jake to watch. He thought of the many new comedies
that he had bought for his and Tom's trip. Mike wanted to keep the
entertainment light with no stories of death, tragedy, or violence. He
realized that since Reverend Malone didn't allow Jake or Lee to attend the
local cinema, and the family had no TV, any titles would be new to Jake.

	The news of the Reverend's death had spread around among the
members of Bill's church. Neither Tom nor Mike anticipated the accustomed
covered dish offerings that the neighbors felt obliged to bring to the new
orphan or orphans. It dawned on Mike that being an orphan was one thing
that he, Tom, and Jake had in common. None of them had folks now. Mike, at
the same time, kept thinking about the Malone house. He was willing to
spend whatever it took to modernize the place and repair, paint it, install
a new heating and air-conditioning unit, a new roof, new furniture and
appliances. But would the Fort Stockton social services allow Jake to
maintain a household by himself? That was a big "would?".  Oh well, that
could be decided in coordination with Lee as well, since Lee would be the
new head of the house.

	The neighbors and church members knocked on the door and got no
answer. They presumed that Jake must be at Coulter's Funeral Home, making
arrangements. It didn't occur to any of them to look inside the Winnebago
parked in front of the house. So they left their foil- and Saran
Wrap-offerings on the front porch for Jake to find when he returned
home. Tom would later estimate that there were somewhere between fifty and
seventy five different dishes, including six banana puddings and fourteen
tuna casseroles, all of the casseroles topped with potato chips.

	Tom packed an overnight bag with a change of clothes and underwear
before he left. He also took a cooler and packed a six-pack of Diet Coke,
some food and snacks for his trip. The three of them finished dinner around
6:00 PM and Tom thought it best if he left as soon as possible. He picked
up his bag and the cooler and headed out the door of the RV toward the
Toyota, but Mike stopped him.

	"Hey, loverboy, you gonna say goodbye or what?" Mike asked.

	Tom turned back to embrace Mike and whispered, "I wanted to kiss
you, but somehow it didn't seem appropriate with Jake watching."

	"Jake knows about us," Mike said. "He won't mind."

	Mike pressed his lips to Tom's and without thinking, the goodbye
kiss turned into instant passion with both of their tongues fighting to
invade the other's mouth. Jake watched as long as he could before his
curiosity turned into embarrassment and he looked away to give the two
lovers a moment of private intimacy. Mike and Tom unlocked the embrace and
Mike walked Tom to the car, leaving Jake alone in the RV.

	Tom got into the SUV and started the motor while Mike stuck his
head inside the driver's window.

	"Call me on the cellular when you get there and then call me again
after you've seen and talked with Lee," Mike said.

	"I will."

	"Please drive carefully."

	"That's why I'm going and not you. I wouldn't rest a moment if you
were driving late at night. Come to think of it, that goes for the day
time, as well. You drive like a loon."

	"How am I gonna ever learn to drive better when you do all the
driving?"

	"You have years to learn."

	"I'm gonna miss you, tonight," Mike said, turning on his tear
ducts.

	"I'm gonna miss you, too."

	"This'll be the first night we've never spent together."

	"I know. I was thinking that all during dinner, but in less than
twenty-four hours, we'll be back in bed making love. Just keep that in
mind."

	"That thought won't leave my mind until you get back."

	"Mike, keep Jake happy. I'm worried about him. If he wants to sleep
with you tonight, well, let him...but I said 'SLEEP', nothing else!"

	"That idea should never cross your mind. You wasted your breath
saying it out loud. Just YOU...don't pick up any hitchhikers."

	"My doors will stay locked until I get to Dallas. I gotta get
going."

	"I love you."

	"I love you, too, my little saint of the cacti."

	"CacTUSES!"

	Tom laughed and drove off. Mike stood in the road until the Toyota
disappeared, then he went back into the RV to see Jake. As soon as Mike
opened the door, he was deafened by the sounds of loud white noise and
static. He rushed in and found Jake in front of the large TV with the
remote in his hand.

	"Gosh darn it!" Jake said, loudly over the noise. "I can't operate
this thing. I can't find one single channel we were watching last night."

	'So much for Jake's grief!', Mike thought to himself. "What are you
looking for?" Mike asked him.

	"The naked channels!"

	"Naked women, naked men, or both?"

	"MEN! The kind that you and Tom watch. If I'm gonna be stayin' with
two quee...gays, I might as well get used to what you two do."

	"Jesus!" Mike said, under his breath.

	Little did Mike know that eight hours later he would awaken with
one of the biggest frights of his life.


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	Two days had passed since Leona Leighton's rude visit to Cliff's
study. Cliff rarely showed anger as it wasn't a natural behavior for
him. Sure, he became angry about some of the imbecilic actions by the
current administration in Washington. He was always upset when someone he
knew discovered that they had acquired HIV, AIDS, or Hepatitis C, by not
using condoms. But seldom did he ever let an irate demeanor show in front
of parishioner or resident of Briarwood, especially a misinformed Baptist
who was so narrow-minded concerning a gay lifestyle. Most men and women who
were openly gay were used to slurs, hatred, threatening letters and phone
calls, and had learned to shrug it off as ignorance. But Leona had gotten
to Cliff a bit...not so much she, but her son, Billy.

	Cliff's study had seen many such youngsters over the years, young
men and women, teens on the brink of suicide because of the treatment they
received at home or from their so-called 'friends' who wouldn't open their
hearts and minds to accept the young person's gay persona. Billy might be
at the crux of his life and need someone to give him structure or support
in accepting his way of life...certainly not harsh words from a parent, an
intolerable minister, or a meddlesome psychologist, fresh out of college,
who's convinced he can magically transform any gay into a straight person.

	"Jesus! Why can't the world let things be as God intended them to
be?" Cliff often said to himself, as well as to Roger.

	Cliff was unaware of the young man sitting on the steps to the back
entrance to St. Genesius, waiting to see him.

	Alvin, Cliff's secretary had officially closed Cliff's office
around 5:00 PM and had gone home. Cliff remained to add two more paragraphs
to next Sunday's sermon. He read over the anecdotes on his word processor,
saved them, and logged off his computer for the day. Earlier he had poured
himself a small snifter of brandy and he took the time to finish it before
leaving for home. Roger phoned to say he wouldn't be home for dinner until
eight-thirty or nine o'clock, so there was no reason for Cliff to hurry. He
looked at his calendar and smiled to see "Kane-Clayton christening"
scheduled for Sunday after next. What a wonderful day to look forward to!
Rob and Timmy were tentatively planning to fly down. It would be a
wonderful celebration for all the Briarwood boys.

	Cliff left his office to go out the back door of the church to lock
it and saw a young man standing there to meet him.

	"Father Cliff?" said the young teenage voice.

	"Yes?"

	"Can I talk to you for a minute?"

	"Of course."

	"My name is..." The boy didn't have to finish his sentence as Cliff
didn't need a hint to know that the boy must be Billy Leighton.

	"Billy?" Cliff asked.

	"Yes sir, but how did you know my name? We've never met."

	Cliff looked at the young man who was medium height and build, not
athletic at all. His hair was blonde and was cut a la 1950's flat top
(probably to please Leona). His skin was pale; his face, fair with a
sprinkle of freckles across the bridge of his nose. And then there were
Billy's eyes...a shade of crystal blue that could only have been sired by
Paul Newman. There was a small indenture between Billy's eyebrows caused by
youthful worry: another mark Leona had left on her son at his early age.

	Cliff hesitated telling Billy how he knew him, "I..."

	"I know," Billy interrupted. "My mom came to see you. I heard all
about it. I guess I should apologize if she was rude."

	"Billy, never apologize for another person's actions, only your
own. That's all you're responsible for."

	"But still, I know how she can be when she's mad."

	"Billy, I don't suppose that your mother knows where you are right
now?"

	"I suppose not, too. She'd be angry as heck!"

	"Do you want to run the risk of her finding out and maybe making
you pay the consequence?"

	"Father, when can I start doing the things that I want? Do I have
to wait until I'm eighteen, and then, twenty-one?"

	"As long as you live with your parents, they'll have certain rules
you'll have to abide by."

	"Even if they're making my life miserable? Are they trying to make
me hate them?"

	"No, that's against one of God's ten commandments and you should
never hate your parents, no matter what."

	"Why isn't there a commandment about parents hating their kids?"

	"Do you feel your parents hate you?"

	"I'm sure of it! I can't go places or do the things that other kids
my age do, unless it's some church social and who wants to do that?"

	"Oh, I don't know. The young people at my church have a pretty
active social life, in and out of the church."

	"Then why can't I be one of them? I have three buddies, Will, Carl,
and Rick, who are members of your church and they're always telling me what
a great time they have here."

	"Did you attend services with them here?"

	"Three times, Father. I'd like to attend more, but...I don't
know. Mom said that she'd call the police and have them escort me out of
church the next time I came."

	"Billy, I shouldn't contradict your mother, but you're not breaking
a law by coming to St. Genesius. There's nothing for which the police could
arrest you."

	"Then she'd try to have YOU arrested. She said you're contributing
to the delinquency of a minor...me!"

	Cliff didn't know whether to smile or be angry at Billy's
remark. "Billy, do you feel you were being defiled or filled with evil
thoughts by the three services which you attended?"

	"Heavens, no! This is the first place I ever felt I could be myself
and think my own thoughts!"

	"Did your mother ever tell you why she feels as she does about this
church?"

	"She said that you hide subliminal messages in your sermons to make
everyone gay who goes here."

	"Do you believe that?"

	"Gosh, no! I knew I was gay before I ever came to this church!"

	"Did your friends, Will, Carl, and Rick influence you?"

	"Do you mean are they gay?"

	"I wasn't going to ask."

	"Well, they're not! But I think that they know that I am. That's
why they told me I could be comfortable here and that I'd be welcome."

	"Billy, you're always welcome here, whether you're gay or not. I
wish parents such as yours knew and understood this."

	"Father, my mom wants to send me to a shrink to make sure that I
don't grow up gay."

	"Oh?"

	"Father, IF I have to go, I'll play along with the doc but he won't
change the way I feel."

	"Billy, do you mind if I pry and ask if you've ever had a gay
experience?"

	"You mean sex?"

	"Well...yes."

	"Only by myself. I have gay thoughts when I go to bed."

	"Do you know any gay boys your age?"

	"There was this one guy, a senior who graduated. He was gay."

	"How did you know he was gay?"

	"EVERYONE DID! He had AIDS and went to the Cole Institute and got
well. He was valedictorian of his class."

	"Are you referring to Mike Hanley?"

	"Yes, he used to go to church here before he went away on some
trip. I was hoping I could see him the first Sunday I came here."

	"Did Mike know you?"

	"Naw, I was just a little kid, a ninth grader. He never even spoke
to me."

	"I'm sure he would if he'd known you'd liked to have met him."

	"Do you know when he's coming back?"

	"It'll be a while."

	"It's just as well. Since I'm being so frank with you, I might as
well tell you, I had a crush on Mike."

	"I'm sure Mike would've been flattered."

	"I mean, Mike was like a hero to me. I knew he must've had
thousands of boyfriends and many sexual experiences."

	"Why would you think that? Did Mike 'play around' at Briarwood
High."

	"No, but he must have BEFORE he came there, lots of times with lots
of guys. How else would he have gotten AIDS?"

	"Billy, there are many ways Mike could have contracted AIDS, and if
it was sex, it might have only taken one sexual experience, not many."

	"I used to wish I could get it, just so Mike would pay attention to
me. We'd both have something in common."

	"But Mike was cured before he became a student at Briarwood High. I
hope you never have that thought again about wanting to get AIDS."

	"If I DID have it, then Mom would have to accept the idea that I'm
gay. She couldn't change me if I had it."

	"Billy, I wish Mike were here to talk to you. I wish there was
someone your age that you could confide in."

	"I was hoping to find someone here at St. Genesius...someone my
age...maybe even a boyfriend," Billy murmured quietly.

	"Billy, let me scout my congregation and see if I can discreetly
find another student who goes to Briarwood High...someone you could talk
with at school without the problem of your sneaking in to this church
without your Mom's knowledge."

	"Would you try to find a cute one?"

	Cliff smiled to himself. "I'll see what I can do." Then Cliff
joked, "Any preference...blonde, brunette, or redhead."

	Billy realized that Cliff was kidding him and replied, "Oh, one of
each for starters."

	They both laughed.

	"Now you'd better scurry home before someone sees you and tries to
have us both arrested."

	"Father, talking to you is just like I thought it would be."

	"Oh, how's that?"

	"Sweet!"

	'I suppose that's better than 'cool' or 'peachy',' Cliff thought as
he waved while Billy ran home happily.

	Roger came home at 8:30, weary from a long day at the Institute. Cliff
waited for him to eat the dinner Jay had prepared. Jay and Troy had eaten
earlier in order to go to a Broadway concert at the Briarwood Civic
Auditorium. John McDaniel, Rosie O'Donnell's former musical director, was
presenting an all-Sondheim concert featuring John Barrowman and Ruthie
Henshall, two of the original Broadway cast members of Sondheim's "Putting
It Together".

	Cliff had just finished giving thanks when the phone rang.

	"Uh oh," Roger exclaimed. "Yours, mine, or ours?"

	"Let's hope not either. We've both had a full day," Cliff
replied. "I'll get it." Cliff answered the phone.

	"Hello?"

	"Father Cliff?" the voice asked.

	"Yes?"

	"This is Tom Potter of the Briarwood police."

	"Hello, Tom. How are you this evening?"

	"I'm fine. I wanted to say how much my wife and I enjoyed your
sermon last Sunday."

	"Thanks, Tom, but I know you didn't call me to talk about last
Sunday's service."

	"You're right, Father."

	"What can I do for you, Tom?"

	"We're investigating a mess down here at headquarters. There's a
kid here, who's asking to see you."

	"Oh?"

	"His name is Billy Leighton, you know--the son of the big car
dealership owner?"

	"Is Billy in some kind of trouble?"

	"You could say that. He's been asking for you ever since we
arrested him."

	"What was the reason for his arrest?"

	"Father, it seems that Billy got into some kind of argument or
fight with both of his parents and, well, he...he somehow took a shotgun
and killed both his mom and his dad."

	"Jesus Christ! Are you certain that he did it?"

	"Yes, Father. Billy confessed."

	"My God! Does he have a lawyer to represent him?"

	"So far as I know, no."

	"I'll call Walter Clayton and I'll meet him down there. How is
Billy?"

	"It's the damndest thing, Father Cliff. The boy had to be taken to
Briarwood General hospital to be treated for bruises and cuts over
seventy-five percent of his body before we could arrest him.  Since we
brought him down here at headquarters, he hasn't shown one sign of
remorse. He hasn't shed one tear. He...he almost seems happy that he
committed the murders."

	"Tom, I'll be down there in fifteen minutes, as soon as I call
Walter. Tell Billy that I'm on my way."

	"I'll do that and thanks, Father."

	Cliff's hands were shaking as he hung up the phone. Roger saw the
distraught look on Cliff's face and went to him.

	"My God, babe, what's wrong?"

	"I met this kid this afternoon in the parking lot at
St. Genesius...and now his world has come to an end."

	Cliff quickly dialed Walter.


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	Steve wrestled with his own feelings about seeing Noah the next
day.  Granted, he had all but been given permission by Hal to see his
brother, but Steve didn't know if he was ready to commit himself to a
budding relationship--at least his first gay relationship. Steve took pride
in his sexual excursions with the girls and women of Hawthorne. He knew
just how to please them before he experienced his own climax.  For most
guys, sex was just a quick way of satisfying themselves, leaving the girls
high and wide, receiving little if any sexual gratification. Sometimes a
guy could get off in just a matter of seconds or a very few minutes, while
it took a girl much longer to reach an orgasm. Many guys were selfish in
that respect because once they had shot their load, their need for sex
diminished and it required a great art, as well as great concentration, to
maintain an erection for the sometimes ten to thirty minutes for the girl
to climax. Steve didn't have that problem. If needs be, he resorted to
cunnilingus, having the girl undergo her first big "O" before achieving his
own. That's why Steve was so popular. Word had spread among the women and
girls of Hawthorne and that was the main reason they were willing to date
him over the other guys.

	Steve was confident of his sexual prowess with the female
gender. He knew how to get himself off...but with another guy? Steve was
reluctant even to try, mainly because he'd never had the urge to have sex
with another male, but also, he didn't know what to do to please another
guy. On this level he would be all but a rank amateur. But, of course, if
Noah was a virgin, Noah would have nothing to compare to Steve's first
attempt at gay sex. Could he really go down on a guy and give him head the
way girls had done to him? Then there was the qualm about male
intercourse. The one time Dr. Blevins had probed Steve's anus, it had hurt
like hell...and the doctor was only using one of his bony fingers. The size
of a strong, large penis entering him was another story. No doubt he could
fuck Noah, there couldn't be that much difference. A hole is a hole and if
a vagina can adapt and stretch to accommodate entrance by a dick, an anus
could do the same, Steve supposed.

	Steve stayed home most of the day following his visit to
Greenport's Motel 6. He turned on TV. The fall pro-football games didn't
start for another month. Steve didn't especially care for pro-baseball, but
there was a soccer game on one of the channels he watched as long as he
could stand it before changing channels. Like most Americans, to Steve,
soccer was just a lot of men running around the field, scoring very few
goals, if any. It was boring. Steve flipped the TV remote until found a
taped college wrestling meet. Steve was suddenly fascinated by the
wrestling gear the athletes wore. It looked as if some of the guys were
wrestling without jock straps. Steve was watching their crotches to see the
guys penises keep changing positions with each body throw...some of them
were up, others down. Occasionally, one of the wrestlers would grab the
other's crotch and not let go. The TV camera always seemed to go to another
shot from behind to mask this move, but the more Steve watched, he was
certain that some of the guys had reached a full erection. Damn! It was
like watching two guys have sex with their clothes on. Steve's eyes became
transfixed on crotch watching for the first time in his life. He was even
more alarmed by his own crotch bulge beginning to grow. What the fuck was
happening to him? This had never happened before...at least, not until he
became interested in Noah. Had he been gay for a long time but been totally
unaware of it? He thought back to the times that he and members of his
immediate group had had jerk-off sessions down at the lake. In his mind, he
could remember the vivid details of Randy's, Ty's, and Hal's dicks, so he
realized he must have noticed them more than he'd ever imagined.

	Watching the wrestling meet, he had a sudden urge to get
off. Before he knew it, he had whipped out his organ and was giving it the
spanking of its life...just watching the sporting event on TV. When he
finished, traces of semen had reached areas of his entire body. He'd never
had an orgasm like that...at least not while masturbating. He realized that
guys had really turned him on.

	Sex was one thing...making love was another thing, opposite
entirely. Never had he made love to a girl because, honestly, he'd never
had an emotional feeling toward one of them. But his feelings for Noah were
far beyond merely having sex. Noah wanted Steve to make love to him and
maybe that's what Steve wanted as well. He still wasn't sure though, and
was still unable to see himself going through with it.

	Noah, on the other hand, was pleased that he had gotten Steve to
remove most of his clothing and hold him in the bed at the motel, but Noah
still felt a tinge of rejection because Steve had refused to have sex with
him.

	It was Sunday. Hal had taken his car and had gone to visit
Carolyn. Their parents had gone to church. His mother had packed a large
picnic hamper to take to an all-day church gathering down by the lake, so
Noah was left alone to find his own entertainment on a Sunday afternoon. He
left his house, walking slowly to town to see if he might spot Steve at
Smiley's. When he got there, the poolhall was all but empty...no Steve, not
even Randy or Ty. Wade had a cue stick in his hand and was practicing shots
all by himself. Wade was not proficient enough to play the game with his
two best friends, Randy and Ty. So this was a good chance for him to
improve his game. Noah saw him and went to the pool table to join him. On
the next shot, Wade scratched.

	"Damn!" Wade said to himself, "Why do I keep doing that?"

	"Hey, Wade," Noah said.

	"Oh, hi," Wade replied looking up from the table momentarily.

	"Wanna shoot a game with me?" Noah asked.

	"Aw, you'd probably beat me, too." Wade replied. "I'm just no good
at playing this game. I already know how good you are. I watched you play
the other day."

	"There's really nothing to it. I just apply plane geometry to my
game. I envision the table as a large blackboard and the pool balls as points
on a triangle. Then I try to figure out the angles where the ball will go,
if it's hit from a certain direction."

	"I'm afraid I wasn't good at math, especially geometry."

	"It's one of my favorite subjects," Noah said. "What are your
favorites, Wade?"

	"I love music, English, especially poetry. My mother has read poems
to me all my life. I really like Byron, Shelley, and Keats."

	"How about Robert Browning and Elizabeth Barrett?"

	"They're wonderful, too."

	"I never knew that you liked poetry, but then, I was always just a
kid around you and never really knew what you liked."

	"I don't talk much about poetry around Randy and Ty. It's not their
bag, I know. Besides, if they knew, that would give them another excuse to
think of me as a sissy."

	"I've never heard them call you a sissy."

	"They never have...not to my knowledge, but I know they think it."

	"Do you plan to go to college, Wade?"

	"Probably not. I had my chance when I finished high school, but
leaving home and leaving my mother...well, she had something to say about
that. Since there's no college in Hawthorne, going to it was out of the
question."

	"Would you have liked to have gone, if your mother would've let
you?"

	"Sure. I wanted to go to the University of North Carolina and study
English...and read all the poetry I could find in the library there."

	"We have a large library at Baylor. I spend lots of evenings there
by myself."

	"You're lucky that your parents sent you away to a private high
school. It doesn't look to me as if I'll ever leave Hawthorne as long as my
parents are alive."

	"Pardon my saying it, Wade, but that's terrible. You'll be
twenty-one in a year or so and you should live your own life."

	"Tell that to my mother, will you?"

	"Do you have any social life?"

	"Not outside from the things I do with Randy and Ty. Mother doesn't
exactly approve of them. She never has, but at least they're not girls and
she lets me go with them as long as she knows where we are and what we're
doing."

	"You never date like Randy and Ty do?"

	"Nope. I've never been alone with a girl."

	"Because of your mother?"

	Wade's face turned red from embarrassment. "I guess you could say
that."

	"But don't you want to?"

	"Probably not. At my age, if a guy hasn't been on a date, much less
kissed one...or worse. It's almost too late. I wouldn't know what to do."

	"This is really embarrassing for me to ask, but are you still
virgin."

	"Yeah."

	"Me, too."

	"Yeah, but I'm three or four years older than you. You still have
time. It's not too late for you."

	"Do you think about girls when you're alone?"

	"Not really. I think about Randy and Ty with their girlfriends and
wonder what they do. I sometimes wonder about your brother, Hal, and
Carolyn...and then, there's Steve. It doesn't take much imagination to know
what he's doing."

	Wade's last remark stung Noah, as if he'd been hit in the face with
a wet rag.

	"Steve makes out a lot? Is that what you're saying?"

	"A LOT? Shoot, he makes out sometimes with several different girls,
all in the same evening."

	"Wade, do you...well, you know...make out...by yourself?"

	"Sure, but not even my mother knows that or she'd make me stop."

	"Damn, Wade! She won't let you have your own thoughts?"

	"Not unless they're about her, the church, and all other clean
functions."

	"Do you feel like walking?"

	"Where to?"

	"Anywhere...down the street, hiking into the woods, just somewhere
to go."

	"I suppose."

	"Let's get a couple of cold Cokes from the snack bar to take with
us."

	The two of them ordered two canned Cokes and left Smiley's. The sun
was hot, the streets were almost bare since everything in town was closed
for Sunday, except Smiley's, Cutter's Pharmacy, and Jenson's Texaco
station.

	"Should you call your mother first?" Noah asked.

	"Naw, she's at the church picnic. I told her I had a headache and
didn't want to go. So she thinks I'm at home or off somewhere with Randy
and Ty."

	"Okay, it'll just be us two, Tom and Huck going on an adventure."
Noah said. "Do you have any ideas where we should go?"

	"We could hike up to Sherman's Ridge and get a good look at the
Smoky Mountains. I know a place where Randy and Ty used to go to drink beer
when we were in high school. This is Sunday. We used to go up there and
count used condoms on the ground after everyone had used the place the
night before."

	They began their trek to Sherman's Ridge. They followed a mountain
stream which originated from the ridge. Noah and Wade continued their
conversation.

	"Have you ever put a condom on?" Noah asked.

	"Once." Wade replied. "One time, Randy bought a whole box and he
was trying to take the cellophane wrapper off and he accidentally opened
the box too quickly and condoms went flying all around in his car. He
picked them all up but one. I found it sticking in between the cushions in
the back seat and slipped it into my pants pocket. I didn't tell him. Later
that night, I went into my room and put it on."

	"What did it feel like?"

	"Tight and strange. You know, like it feels when you try one of
your mother's plastic gloves that comes with her hair dye?"

	"Did you...you know?"

	"Jerk off in it?"

	"Yes."

	"Sure, it only took me about fifteen seconds I was so excited and
also scared that my mother would catch me."

	"I've never even held one in my hands."

	"It's no big deal. That was my first and only time to have one."

	"Wade, do you jerk off a lot?"

	"When I feel it's safe."

	"What do you mean, 'safe'?"

	"Oh, I really don't have any privacy at my house. Sure, I got my
own room, but Mother comes in every time she wants to check on
me. Sometimes two or three times at night after I've gone to sleep."

	"Good Lord, what for?"

	"Oh, I don't know. Maybe she wants to see if I'm still alive or
maybe she wants to be sure I haven't run away during the night."

	"Would you like to run away?"

	"I think about it all the time. I want to grow up, but she won't
let me. I'll be a forty-year-old kid and she'll be in her sixties, still
trying to keep me from going out into the world on my own."

	"That's horrible, Wade."

	"I know it, but there's nothing I can do about it."

	"You ought to think about moving to Chattanooga, where Baylor's
at. It's a great city. You could get a job, find a place to live, and do
whatever you want."

	"I would love to, Noah, but it just doesn't seem possible."

	They walked for another half hour and soon they were at the peak of
Sherman's Ridge. They went out on a crest and stood on a huge rock which
looked over a valley with the Great Smokies in the distance.

	"God, it's great up here!" Wade exclaimed. "Take a deep breath and
smell the clean air."

	Wade stretched his arms out to their fullest to inhale. His left
hand hit Noah's face, mostly his nose, causing it to bleed.

	"Gosh, I'm sorry!" Wade said, "Here, Noah, take my handkerchief and
press hard just above your upper lip."

	Noah did as he was told. The nosebleed wasn't bad and stopped
rather quickly.

	"Now I can't smell the air," Noah joked.

	"Damn, man, I didn't mean to do that."

	"I know, I'm all right."

	"Here, let me take a look." Wade said, pulling the handkerchief
away. He took his thumb and raised the tip of Noah's nose to get a better
view. His face was close to Noah's and Noah looked solidly into Wade's eyes
up close. Noah slowly tilted his head and leaned forward, placing his lips
on Wade's. Wade, not knowing how to respond to Noah's blatant gesture, let
his lips stay there. Both of them closed their eyes and each imagined
himself with his own fantasies. Noah was thinking about Steve while Wade
was thinking of 'just anybody' who'd given him his first kiss.

	After a few moments, both their eyes opened and they faces withdrew
from one another's.

	"If I embarrassed you, Wade, I'm sorry," Noah said in a voice just
above a whisper.

	"It's...it's...you took me by surprise, Noah."

	"Did I shock you?"

	"Well...yes."

	"Did you get angry?"

	"Well...no. It's just that I wasn't expecting you to do something
like that."

	"Am I the first guy to ever kiss you?"

	"Noah, not only are you the first guy, you're the first, period..."

	"Want to do it again?"

	"Yeah...sure...why not? We've already done it once."

	Slowly their lips met once again. This time Noah put his arms
around Wade's back and embraced him. Wade followed Noah's lead and put his
arms around Noah. The second kiss became more passionate and Noah bravely
put his tongue against Wade's lips to attain entry into his mouth. Everything
was happening so quickly, Wade had no chance to think about what they were
doing and narrowly opened his mouth to receive Noah's tongue. The two tongues
clashed and soon Wade began to try to access the inside of Noah's mouth. It
was a duel where both of them were winning.

	Noah lowered his right hand down Wade's back until he reached the
spot between Wade's buttocks.  Noah pulled Wade's pelvic region into his
own. Both discovered they had raging hardons beneath their jeans...each
wanting the other to feel his first, as Wade began grinding his swollen
crotch into Noah's.

	The kiss ended but they remained in the embrace. Their mouths were
next to each other's ear and Wade whispered, "What are we doing, Noah?"

	"Do you want to stop?" Noah whispered back to him.

	"No, I just want to hold you like this. I've never held anyone
before."

	"I like being held, especially by you, Wade."

	"I dreamed about it. When you first came home from school, looking
like an Olympic athlete with your new build. I wondered how it would feel
to have your big chest pressed to mine."

	"Want me to take my shirt off?"

	"I'd love it!"

	"Only if you take yours off, too."

	"But my chest is not..."

	"Forget it. It doesn't matter as long as we're touching."

	The two unlocked their embrace and took off their shirts. Once
again, Noah moved close to Wade making sure that their nipples touched
while they held one another.

	"Oh, my God, Noah! This is so wonderful! I feel like I could hold
you like this forever. It's my dream come true."

	"Did you ever fantasize about me when you were alone?"

	"All the time, Noah, but I never imagined it would ever
happen...not like this. But here you are and it's happening, just like in
my dream."

	"Would you like to go a little further, Wade?"

	"What do you mean?"

	"We still have on our jeans and underwear. Would you like for us to
take them off as well?"

	"What if someone sees us?"

	"There's no one around, Wade. Everyone's at the picnic. You don't
see any cars around here, do you?"

	"I'd feel better if we went over behind those trees over
there. We'd be shielded in case a car drove up."

	"Let's go."

	They walked over to the edge of a patch of woods and slowly began
to remove the rest of their clothing...each watching the other, removing
everything piece by piece until they were both naked.

	"God, you're beautiful, Noah," Wade said, sizing up Noah's body.

	"You're not so bad yourself," Noah replied.

	"Do you think we should be doing this?"

	"Wade, it's time we both found out about real life instead of our
fantasies."

	"How far do you want to go?" Wade asked, nervously.

	"All the way, if you're willing?" Noah replied.

	"I'm willing."

	They walked toward one another meshing their bodies together and
locking their lips in their third kiss of the afternoon...and their
lives. Neither of them was embarrassed as their erections touched. This
time, their lower appendages began a duel as each lowered a hand to wrap it
around the other's straining member.

	"Oh, God!" Wade said, "Don't stop. Keep doing what you're doing,"
as Noah began to masturbate Wade.

	"I think I can do better," Noah replied.

	"How?"

	"Wait and see," Noah said as he lowered himself into a kneeling
position and took Wade into his mouth.

	For the next hour, the two experimented with the other's body,
kissing, licking, sucking, finally giving into the other's ultimate
sacrifice by having anal intercourse. They had waited all their lives for
this as they tried to fill in the missing years of their youth. Before they
stopped, each had reached three orgasms apiece.

	Both were tired, sweaty, exhausted, but enormously happy. It had
been worth the wait for both of them.

	"Noah, I think I could fall in love with you," Wade said, as they
lay side by side on their backs, looking toward the upper branches of the
pine trees which hid them.

	"I think I could love you as well," Noah replied.

	"Did you do this with Steve when you two went out together last
week?"

	"Heavens, no!" Noah said. "It's not like I didn't try, but Steve
was afraid, or unwilling, or both."

	"In my fantasies last weekend. I dreamt about the two of you
together...doing what we just did."

	"Nothing happened between Steve and me. It happened with you
instead."

	"Somehow I feel as if I should thank you."

	"For what?"

	"For letting me know what making love feels like. If this had never
happened, I might've gone through my whole life without knowing."

	"Wade, did you forget when I told you I was a virgin too? It was my
first time as well. I guess I should be thanking you, too."

	"Noah, this is the most wonderful thing that's ever happened to
me. I'm glad it was with you. This might be the only time we ever do this
and I'll never forget it!"

	"Why the only time? We have the rest of the summer."

	"But we might not get the chance that we had today."

	"We'll make the chance."

	"You'll be going away to school in a few short weeks."

	"Yes, and I'll be going to Chattanooga, the place I talked to you
about running away to. You could get a job, find a place to live and I
could come over every night to see you before bed curfew...and we would
have every weekend together. The University of Tennessee at Chattanooga is
there as well and there's a couple of small colleges you could attend if
you wanted to."

	"That's just a dream, Noah, something that could never happen in
real life...not mine, anyway."

	"Wade, we could both MAKE it happen! I could go to college with you
once I graduate from Baylor. We could spend the rest of our lives
together."

	"God, how I'd like that!"

	"Hey, have you rested up enough to go one more round?" Noah asked,
in a joking manner.

	"I could go another and another and another..."

	"Well, shut up and kiss me!"

	Wade rolled his body on top of Noah's and began to kiss him. They
both were sexually excited once more and managed two more climaxes each
before they hiked home.


<><><><><><><><>

	There's always been a theory that a full moon has an effect on the
crazies of the world, those that are in institutions as well as those who
lead regular lives. Anyone who's ever worked in a mental hospital will
swear that the theory is well-founded. The most primitive argument is based
on the effect the moon has on the ocean tides. The magnetic force of the
moon causes the tides to crest higher than any other time. The percentage
of water in the human body is estimated by some experts as being as much as
ninety percent. Thus, the theory goes on to say that the moon's gravity
causes the water be drawn up toward it. like the tide, making more water go
to the human brain. It's just a theory that no one has ever been able to
accurately prove or disprove.

	But there was a full moon over Briarwood the night Billy Leighton
shot and killed his parents. Maybe it was the full moon that caused Ryan
not to come home the same night. Maybe it was the same full moon over Texas
that led Jake to commit a crime.

	Jake and Mike had watched satellite TV until eleven o'clock. Jake
opted to sleep alone in the bed which he had been assigned the night
before. Mike had crawled into his big lonely bed, minus Johnny for the
first time, and both he and Jake were asleep within a half hour.

	Tom had arrived in Dallas around ten-thirty and had gone to see Lee
in the hospital immediately. Lee was still awake in the hospital rec-room,
listening to CD's on a set of headphones. The hospital had a vast library
of classical music and Lee had spent almost every waking moment that he
wasn't receiving treatment, being thrilled by the works of Rachmaninoff,
Chopin, and Mahler. Lee was greatly surprised to see Tom when Tom entered
the large room.

	Tom could hardly believe the immense change in Lee after only a few
days in the hospital. The color in Lee's face was warm and healthy
looking. It appeared Lee had gained five to ten pounds. Lee took off the
headphones. Neither Lee nor Tom felt reticent about greeting one another
with a huge embrace. Tom's arms were big and muscular and Lee felt safe
wrapped in Tom's arms.

	"How you doing, champ?" Tom asked.

	"Pretty good," Lee replied.

	"I hope you don't mind my telling you that you look fantastic."

	"I feel a lot better."

	"What were you listening to, just now?"

	"Debussy. Daphnis and Chloe Suite No. 2."

	"That's one of my favorites. When I was a kid, I found an old LP
which belonged to my mother. 'Daphnis and Chloe' was on one side and Ravel's
'La Mer', on the other. I used to think that the Debussy side sounded more
like the sea than Ravel's."

	"It does sound like the sea with the waves splashing on the shore."

	"Why are you up so late?"

	"I don't sleep good and the medicine the nurse gives me dopes me up
and I don't function well the next day. So one of doctors here said for me
to try music therapy and listen to some quiet music before retiring. It
actually works."

	"I guess you're wondering why I'm here, Lee."

	"I was hoping you were here to see me and not because you had bad
news from home."

	"It is bad, Lee."

	"How's Jake?" Lee asked quickly.

	"Jake is fine."

	"Thank God!"

	"Lee, it's your father...your dad."

	"Oh? Has something happened to him?"

	"He apparently suffered a mild stroke and went into a catatonic
coma. Earlier today, the hospital called to say that your dad has passed
away. I'm sorry, Lee."

	Lee didn't seem to respond to Tom's news. It was as if Tom had
given him a weather forecast.

	"How's Jake taking the news?"

	"Jake's strong. He's acting quite grown-up."

	"He would. That's Jake."

	"I came to see if your doctor would let you come home to help Jake
with your dad's funeral. I thought you'd want to be there."

	"I wanna be there for Jake, but not for my dad."

	"Lee, did you really hate your dad?"

	"All my life, especially after my mom left us. He used to call me a
harlot's son, a whore's boy, a bastard! He whipped and beat me every chance
he got. Sometimes I could be sitting at the kitchen table, reading a book
and Dad would walk up and scream, 'Don't sass me, boy!'. Johnny, I hadn't
said a word. But when he accused me, I'd try to tell him I hadn't sassed
him and he would whip out his belt from his pants and stripe my back and
legs until they bled."

	"God, Lee, that's awful."

	"The more I screamed and yelled with my pain, the harder he would
beat me and holler at me to shut up. I would bite my lower lip until blood
was running down my chin. When he was through, he'd leave me in a heap on
the kitchen floor and I would slowly drag myself to the bathroom to clean
up. Sometimes, Jake would come in and wipe the blood off my back with
alcohol. The next day, if none of my wounds was visible, he'd make me go to
school. If there were any outer marks on my body, he's make me stay home
until I healed so no one would suspect him of beating me. Tom, he was such
a hypocrite, him being a preacher of the Bible, and all."

	"Jesus! Did he ever beat Jake this way?"

	"No. He was sure that Jake was his real son and my mom had gotten
pregnant by another man to have me."

	"Did you ever try to report him to one of your teachers or the
police?"

	"Who'd believe my word over his...the 'voice of God'?"

	"Maybe it would be best if you didn't go back to Fort Stockton for
the funeral."

	"No, Tom, if the doctors here will let me go, I want to, just to be
there for Jake."

	"I'll speak with your doctors in the morning and explain the
circumstances and see if I can get you a temporary discharge for a few days
if I can monitor your medicine."

	"I'm going even if I don't get discharged. I've gotta go see Jake."

	"I realize this is asking the impossible, but will you try to go to
bed now and get some sleep?"

	"Yeah, sure. I think I'll sleep better than I have in a long
while."

	Lee hugged Tom once more, kissed him on the cheek and went out of
the rec room to go to bed.  Tom was still slightly stunned over what Lee
had told him and Lee's strange reaction to the news of his dad's death. It
was almost if Lee was glad. Tom stood in the room slowly shaking his head
in disbelief. He missed Mike and wished he were home in bed with him.


<><><><><><><><>


	After a full day of deliberating and debating the pros and cons of
beginning a relationship with Noah, Steve gave in to his new emotional
feelings and decided to go see Noah and hash out the situation. If Noah
wanted to have sex this time, Steve was ready to agree to Noah's
demands. If it was merely a quick physical romp, then that was okay. If it
involved feelings of love, Steve decided he was prepared to venture into
that spectrum as well.

	Steve went into his bathroom to shave, shower, and deodorize any
offensive body part. He paid special attention to his teeth and breath,
brushing, flossing, and swallowing a mouthful of Scope while he was
gargling.  He had a new shirt and jeans he had never worn and put them
on. Steve spent fifteen minutes combing every hair in place. He took one
final look in the mirror and thought he had never looked better or more
spruced up for any date he'd ever had with a female. On the way to Noah's
house, it occurred to him that he should bring Noah a gift. A guy didn't
present flowers or candy to another guy. There was no reason to buy an
article of clothing since the Carson boys were the best dressed in
Hawthorne.

	He looked at his wrist and noticed the 24 carat gold bracelet he'd
bought himself on a whim and decided that a personal gift of his own would
be the best gift for Noah. While waiting at a traffic light, Steve
unclasped the bracelet and put it in his shirt pocket. Nerve-wise, he was
jittery. He'd taken Noah on two outings the week before, but this was like
a real date. If Noah was willing, maybe they could go up to Sherman's Ridge
and park. That was the best make-out spot in the county.

	When Steve arrived at the Carson residence, neither the Carson
parents' nor Hal's cars were in sight. Steve's heart sank to the pit of his
stomach. Perhaps Noah wasn't at home as well. However, he parked his car,
got out, walked up the sidewalk and the steps to the house and knocked on
the door. No one answered. On his second attempt, Steve heard Noah call out
after the knock. "Just a minute."

	Noah was home and this gave Steve encouragement. It was nearly
three minutes before Noah opened the door.

	"Hi," Steve said warmly.

	"Steve!" Noah replied. "I...I'm so surprised to see you."

	"I was wondering if you'd like to go somewhere and talk about what
happened at the Motel 6?"

	"I...I would like to, Steve, only..."

	Steve could see movement down the hall behind Noah, standing in the
door.

	"Do you have company?"

	"Well, yes and no..."

	"Would you like me to come back later?"

	Steve could see that there WAS a person down the hall, a very
familiar person to Steve. He looked around Noah and said, "Wade? Is that
you?"

	Like a puppy who was about to be scolded for soiling a carpet, Wade
slowly came down the hall to see Steve. As soon as Wade came nearer, Steve
noticed half of Wade's shirttail hanging out of his trousers. His belt
buckle was not fully attached.

	"Hi, Steve," Wade said, rather embarrassed.

	"What's going on?" Steve asked.

	"I met Wade at Smiley's and we took a walk and came back here for a
Coke," Noah explained, badly.

	"Did...did you two...? Oh, my God, NO!" Steve shouted. "You two
went to bed together?"

	"Not exactly," Noah said.

	"But you DID have sex, didn't you?"

	Noah gave Steve a long look. "Yes, Steve, Wade and I did what I
tried to get you to do at Motel 6."

	"But why?"

	"There's no other way to put it, Steve. You had your chance."

	Steve was boiling mad. "FUCK YOU! FUCK THE BOTH OF YOU! YOU...YOU
FAGGOTS!"

	Steve ran down the steps by twos, got in his car and skidded away
in a huff.

	"Gosh!" Wade said, "do you think I should go home?"

	"Not now, Wade. Not now," Noah replied. "I still want to talk to
you about Chattanooga."

	Noah closed the door and took Wade back to his bedroom.


<><><><><><>

	Bright light was coming in from the left side of the
Winnebago. Mike felt he'd only gotten a couple hours of sleep and already
it was daylight. He looked at the wristwatch Tom had given him and it read,
three-twenty...AM.

	Had his watched stopped during the night. It was too early even for
a Texas sunrise, but the entire RV was illuminated. Mike wrapped a sheet
around his naked body and went down the hallway to check on Jake. Jake's
bed was empty. Mike suddenly turned to look out the side window and saw a
huge wall of fire surrounding the Malone house. The entire manse was
ablaze. Mike had two immediate concerns, first to move the RV away to
safety and secondly, to find Jake.

	That's when he saw Jake, running around the inferno, stark
naked. Jake was screaming..."Burn! Burn! Burn! Goddammit! Go to hell and
burn with my fucking dad!"

	Listening to the cries of Jake, Mike froze, not knowing what to do
next.


<><><><><><><><><>

(To be continued in "Briarwood" BOOK-SEVEN---chapter--seventy-eight )