Date: Fri, 23 Mar 2007 13:54:52 EDT
From: RitchChristopher@cs.com
Subject: but-who-knows-where-or-when-7

All rights reserved. Copyright held by the author. If you are underage or
are offended by gay fiction, containing graphic sex and explicit language,
please exit now.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>


                          "But Who Knows Where or When?"

                              Copyright Ritchris, 2007


                                     A Story

                                        by

			         Ritch Christopher


                            with literary enhancement

                                        by

                                    Les Martin


                                    <><><><><>


                                   chapter seven

                                    <><><><><>

                       "Some things that happen for the first time..."

                         excerpted from "WHERE OR WHEN"
                        from Rodgers and Hart's "Babes in Arms"
                                   copyright 1937


<><><><><><><><><><><><>

	It was Saturday and, with Blaine playing golf this morning, Maggie
had loads of time to herself so, upon hearing that Rex had moved back into
the old homestead, Maggie thought she'd pay her baby brother a visit. It
literally had been years since she had been inside her childhood
dwelling. She was never close to either her mother or father. The only
person she'd ever cared about was Rex.

        Thinking about those past years of her youth, Maggie smiled as if
she had a secret. She always knew, when they were children, that Rex had
always looked up to her as being the braver of the two, and she'd never
disillusioned him.  In the winter cold, the walls and the hardwood floors
would creak, raising childish thoughts of ghosts and goblins. Often, if a
window had been left open just a crack to rid the room of stale odors, a
sudden draft of wintry air could enter, causing a door to slam with an
explosive BANG!, making the two siblings jump in terror. In the night, a
loud unexplained noise or a distant thud would have Maggie running to Rex's
room, supposedly to calm him, when the reverse was actually true--she was
more terrified then he and wanted his presence to ensure her safety.
        She'd never liked that old mansion and, upon their death, held no
grudge or feeling of resentment when their parents left the mansion to
Rex. Lord knows she didn't want the old 'spook house' as she used to call
it.

	When she left for college and met Blaine, she vowed never to return
to live in the huge abode. Her vow eventually became unnecessary because
soon thereafter, she and Blaine moved in together and then married... later
buying their present home where she had resided happily ever since.

	Blaine had left early to play a round of golf with his partner,
Frank Whitcomb, so Maggie made her decision to go see Rex. Being August
with the summer heat, there should be no problem with the house settling
and making strange eerie noises, thank God!
        She drove the convertible with the ease and assurance one expects
in a man but rarely sees in women.  Turning into the ancestral driveway and
heading for the house, she realized that she didn't see Rex's car. Well,
perhaps he had parked it inside the large garage.

	Stopping her car at the foot of the staircase which led to the
front door, Maggie got out and climbed the ten steps up to the veranda. She
opened the screen door and, turning the front door knob, found that it
wasn't locked. Feeling like a child again, as if she were re-entering her
childhood, she went inside. Standing in the open doorway, memories of her
youth came back to her. High ceilings, dark, rich woods. However, there was
still a certain odor of age, the smell that old unlived-in houses often
develop. She was sure that Rex had tried to air out the building when he
moved in the day before, but it'd never leave the house completely.

	She took one whiff and said to herself, "God! I hope Rex didn't die
in here during the night! This place smells like a condemned funeral home!
If Rex had any luck at all, the ground would open up and swallow this
monstrosity!"

	Maggie strolled around the main floor, looking at the old
furniture, the drapes.  Everything looked the just the same as it had for
decades, as if it were in some kind of vacuum time capsule. The only real
change was the dust and the odor of decaying wood. As she walked, she could
hear her footsteps echoing upstairs and throughout the domicile. Then she
heard a man's voice calling from the second floor, "Sweetheart? Is that
you?"

	The sudden sound stopped her in her tracks. The voice was certainly
not Rex's, but she remembered Blaine saying that Rex had moved Kent
Stevenson in with him. Her next thought was, 'I wonder where 'sweetheart'
is? In the kitchen?'. She figured that no doubt Rex and Kent had brought
two girls with them to spend the weekend and, just incidentally would fuck
a dozen times or more. So leaving the living room, she walked to the base
of the staircase. When she looked up, she saw Kent standing at the top of
the stairs, totally nude and as sculptured as a Michelangelo statue.

	Maggie smiled and replied, "I'm not your sweetheart, but I'm hoping
that I'll do!"

	Kent looked in shock at Maggie, then, realizing his appearance,
tried to cover his genitals with his bare hands. He was too well endowed to
cover everything, even with two hands.

	"Oh, my God! I'm sorry!" Kent exclaimed.

	"Don't be sorry on my account! Frankly, I like what I see."

	"I...I..."

	"No need to hide yourself! I've already seen ...well, what you're
trying to conceal and believe me, I LIKE what I saw."

	"You're Maggie, aren't you?"

	"Yes, and YOU'RE Kent! I've seen you play football."

	"You really want me to uncover myself? I could go put on some
clothes!"

	"Get serious! I'm a doctor's wife. I know what little boys and big
boys have between their legs."

	"It's just that I have this infection in my testicles and they look
pretty horrible!"

	"A hydrocele infection...commonly called, orchitis?"

	"You know about it?"

	"Sure, lots of guys get it. Once when Blaine was studying for his
state board, we went without sex for nearly a month and Blaine thought HE
had it."

	"Did he?"

	"No. As it turned out, he had plain old 'blue balls' from lack of
shooting off. We made love for two straight days and his swelling went down
like a deflated beach ball!"

	"I wish that would happen to me."

	"By the way, am I interrupting something?"

	"No. I was just getting into the bathtub."

	"I mean, when you called out, 'Sweetheart'! Is there a girl or
woman hiding down here amidst the dusty walls and floors?"

	"No...uh, Rex has gone to the grocery store to fill up the kitchen
cabinets with canned goods."

	"Well, if there's no woman down here...don't tell me that you and
Rex refer to one another as 'sweetheart'?"

	"Uh...we do when we're just kidding around. We started doing it
when we moved in together at the dorm. Only we usually use a Spanish accent
a la Desi Arnaz. We act like we're Lucy and Desi...you know, 'Honey, I'm
home...'!"

	"I'm curious which of you is Lucy and who's Desi? I know goddamned
well that Rex can't be Lucy and seeing you as I did just now...YOU'RE no
'Lucy' either!"

	"We...we take turns."

	"Well, don't let me keep you from your bath. I'll go into the
kitchen and make some coffee and wait for Rex to return."

	"Thanks, he shouldn't be too long."

	"You...uh...you don't need help with your bath, do you? Rex can
tell you that I'm a real expert at giving baths. God knows, I gave him
plenty while he was growing up...even through his teens!"

	"You bathed Rex when he was a teenager?", he said in disbelief.

	"Sure! That's when bathing got to be REAL fun!"

	"I...I never had a sister, so I wouldn't know..."

	"I could show you in a matter of minutes if you'd like!"

	"I...I'm sure you could. I mean...I've had lots of women bathe me
in the shower."

	"I'll bet you have...", she murmured, purposely taking on a Mae
West quality.

	"Lately, Rex has been helping me."

	"Rex? That must be a novelty for him!"

	"All I can say is that you must have taught him well!"

	"Oh...?"

	"He gives really good baths AND sponge baths!"

	"Would you like to have one of mine so that you can compare, just
to see how much he learned?"

	"My doctor, or maybe I should say 'your husband' told me not to get
too excited before my planned surgery. So I think I'd better bathe alone
for now."

	"All right, but maybe you can ask Rex sometime what it felt like
for me to give him a bath..."

	Kent laughed, "I'll do that very thing!" He turned and went back
toward the bathroom. Maggie did as she said. After watching him walk away,
she catalogued the picture of his tight butt.
        Moving into the kitchen to put on a pot of coffee, she saw the
dinner dishes from the night before. clean but still in the
dishwasher. Opening it, she started putting them away, all the while amazed
that she still remembered where each item went.
        Maggie was not a slacker when it came to doing household
chores---she kept hers and Blaine's house in good order and so it was only
natural for her to help out her brother, who was, God knows, NOT the best
housekeeper in the world. Looking in the kitchen closet, she found an
apron, a broom, mop, and dustpan and immediately began cleaning up the
kitchen. This would be her housewarming gift to Rex and Kent. Heck, if she
bought them something, it would only be something else to sit around,
unused, and gathering dust. In less than half an hour, she had Rex's
kitchen sparkling and tidy enough to pass a Martha Stewart inspection.

	With the kitchen done, Maggie, with broom in hand, prepared to
attack the dust and dirt in the dining room. As she began, the front door
opened and in walked Rex, arms laden with bags.

	Seeing his sister, he exclaimed, "Maggie! My God! You look like
Aunt Jemima in your apron!"

	"You're a sight for sore eyes, too, Rex! But I can hardly see you
through the dust storm that arose when you opened the door!"

	Rex walked over to his sister, set down two armfuls of groceries on
a convenient table and put his arms around Maggie to hug her and kiss her
on her cheek.

	"Damn! It's good to see you, Magwumps!" That had been his favorite
name for her since the time he was barely old enough to walk. "But what the
fuck are you doing cleaning up this house?"

	"I heard from Blaine that you were playing nursemaid to Kent
Stevenson and after looking at this place, I didn't want risk him
developing emphysema or COPD before he had his surgery."

	"Where is Kent? Have you met him?"

	"Yes, Rex. As a matter of fact, I met ALL of him?", she almost
giggled.

	"Oh? What's that supposed to mean?"

	"Nothing...but he should be out of the bathtub by now."

	"Oh?"

	"I thought surely when you came in that you would call to him, 'Hey
Honey, I'm home!'."

	"Sorry?"

	"You know like Lucy and Desi...the way you and Kent talk to each
other when no one else is around?"

	"I don't know what the fuck you're talking about? Is this some joke
or riddle?"

	"I'm only repeating what Kent said to me when he yelled,
'Sweetheart, is that you?', when I came in."

	"God! It's only ten a.m. and I KNOW you don't drink this early, but
I swear to God I don't have any idea what you're talking about!"

	"Skip it! Take your groceries into the kitchen and sound like
you're amazed!"

	Rex picked up the two bags and went inside the kitchen and
exclaimed, "JESUS H. CHRIST!. I've barely been gone an hour---how the hell
did you get so much done?"

	"That comes with many years of experience at being a housewife!"

	"I don't know how to thank you, Sis!"

	"It's the least I could do."

	"After all these years, you still look after me!" For a moment, she
could see again her little brother as a child.

	"That's because you're the only other man in my life besides
Blaine. You were my first love...remember?"

	"That's funny. I'd never thought about it, but actually, Magwumps,
YOU'RE the only girl I've ever loved."

	"Lord knows you've gone through enough women. You never stayed with
one of them long enough to find out if you loved them or not!"

	"I never could find one I could trust as not being after my
money. If you hadn't met Blaine when you did, your life might have turned
out like mine!"

	"Money CAN be a problem if you have it! Fortunately, Blaine's
practice is damned successful and we don't even touch MY money. It just
sits in the bank and earns interest."

	"So does mine! I've never had a reason to spend any of it, so to
speak..."

	"You COULD hire a housekeeper or a fixer-upper to make this
mausoleum livable if you intend to live with Kent for some time."

	"That's a great idea. Why didn't I think of it?"

	"Rex, before Kent comes downstairs, tell me---how bad is his
condition?"

	"How much has Blaine told you?"

	"Not very much...just that he's planning to do extensive surgery on
him. His testicles DO look frightening!"

	"You've seen Kent's testicles?"

	"Yes, hasn't everyone? As a matter of fact, just before he got into
his bath. I offered to help bathe him, but he refused...darn it!"

	"You held a conversation with Kent while he was naked?"

	"Silly! You think I'm not familiar with the male anatomy? Heck! I
could draw diagrams of YOUR genitals from memory!"

	"Yes, but that's because you used to jerk me off when I was a
teenager. You didn't offer to jerk Kent off, did you?"

	"Rex, darling, I'm not a sex addict! Of course not! I just offered
to bathe him."

	"Jesus! You never change, do you?"

	"Same old Maggie! Ask Blaine. He'll tell you."

	"I hope you never change. I love you just as you were and as you
are!"

	Kent walked in from down the stairs into the kitchen at that
moment, dressed in jogging pants, a sweat shirt with the Epperson U's
insignia and tennis shoes.

	"Hey, big guy!" Kent said to Rex.

	"Hey, there, yourself! How are you feeling?"

	"Much better. The hot water in the tub felt SO good on my...you
know..."

	"Good!"

	Kent suddenly noticed the cleanliness of the kitchen. "GOOD GOD!
What happened to the dirty kitchen? I didn't hear Tinkerbelle sprinkling
her fairy dust down here. It looks terrific!"

	"That's my sister...the maid!"

	"Does she rent by the hour?" Kent asked.

	"Only in the bedroom, lovey, and only my husband can afford me!"
Maggie said, smugly.

	"Lucky guy!" Kent said. "Here, Rex, let me help you put the
groceries away. That way, I'll know where everything is."

	"I won't argue. Go to it!"

	Kent began taking canned goods and other food items out of the
bags, putting them into the cabinets, the refrigerator, and the
freezer. "What's for dinner tonight, before I freeze the wrong things?"

	"I thought we might go out for dinner tonight," Rex replied.

	"But what about our long weekend at home together?"

	"A couple of hours out on the town won't interfere with our
weekend."

	"You guys planning to have a little female companionship over this
weekend?" Maggie asked.

	"Not THIS weekend," Rex said.

	"I thought you might want to engage in some bedroom activities
before Kent's surgery," she offered.

	"We don't even know when the surgery is scheduled, Maggie," Kent
replied.

	"Rex, do you mind if I ask you a personal question in front of
Kent?"

	"I really don't know how to keep you from it! I never could in all
the years we lived together."

	"All right! I'll just come out and say it! Do I get a vibe that you
two are trying to keep a big secret from me?" Maggie asked, leaning on the
broom.

	"Shit, Magwumps! What kind of secret?"

	"There's SOMETHING going on between the two of you. I've noticed
the way you two keep looking at one another and I'm getting a peculiar
feeling..."

	"Maggie, we're best friends. I guess Kent and I look at each other
like this all the time."

	"Even when you call each other 'sweetheart' and 'honey'?"

	"What? Maggie, I'm still in the dark. What are you getting at?"

	"Rex, if I didn't know you as well as I do, I'd swear that you and
Kent were a couple!"

	Kent blushed while Rex cleared his throat. Both looked
flustered. Kent turned his back to Maggie and got very busy putting away
the rest of the groceries. "Maggie, Kent and I ARE a couple...a couple of
best friends! You've just never seen the two of us together."

	"You're right, but I'm wondering how you'd act toward one another
if I WEREN'T here?  Rex, you know it wouldn't make a bit of difference to
me if you and Kent WERE a couple."

	"I know...but if we were, I'm sure you'd be shocked just a little
since you're very familiar with my track record with the 'ladies'!"

	"I can see I'm getting NOWHERE with you, little brother, so Kent,
would you please turn around and look me straight in the eye?"

	"Maggie, PLEASE! Leave Kent alone!"

	"Not until he looks me in the eye."

	Kent slowly turned around from the cabinets and Maggie walked
straight toward him, stopping about a foot from his face. Kent's blushing
pink face had suddenly turned beet red.

	Kent cleared his throat. "Uh...what would you like to know,
Maggie?"

	"Are you in love with Rex?"

	Kent took a deep breath and held it as he closed his eyes. "What
should I say to her, Rex?" He asked.

	"Go ahead and tell her the truth, Kent."

	Kent sighed and quietly, said, "...Yes...yes, I am..."

	"Well, at least you're honest!" Maggie replied. "From what you just
said to Kent, Rex, were you aware of how he feels about you?"

	It was Rex's turn to sigh. "Yes, Maggie, I KNOW how he feels..."

	"And you love Kent, don't you?"

	"Guilty!"

	"Come here, little brother!" Maggie said, beckoning Rex to stand
beside Kent. Slowly, Rex moved to his position and Maggie put an arm around
each of their necks and hugged them.  "That's WONDERFUL, you two!" She
exclaimed. "How long have you been lovers?"

	"Since last night!" Rex confessed.

	"JESUS! Then your relationship is brand new?" Maggie asked with
great enthusiasm. "THIS CALLS FOR A CELEBRATION! I want to call Blaine on
the golf course to tell him that you two are going to be our guests for
dinner. Blaine can make reservations before he leaves the country club!"

	"Maggie, we don't want the whole world to know, just yet!" Rex
said.

	"WHY NOT, FOR CHRIST'S SAKE? This is the twenty-first century now
where gay men and women can be themselves without the fear of being ashamed
or outted. OUT yourselves first and avoid any controversy!"

	"I don't know, Maggie..."

	"I DO! GOD! What a handsome couple you make. You know something,
Rex. All my life I've been afraid of what kind of wife you'd choose because
that meant I would have to compete with her. But NOW! Oh, how glorious! I
don't have to compete with a quarterback and have face-lifts, botox
injections when it comes time...breast implants...a whole new wardrobe from
Gucci and Versace! What a fucking load you two have taken off my back!"
Maggie said with glee.

	Maggie's speech had lightened the tension of his and Kent's
revelation and Rex began to laugh. "I'll swear, if I didn't know you were a
natural brunette, Maggie, you'd have to be the brunt of every blonde joke
in comic history! You, big sister, are something else!"

	"Maggie, you don't know how scared I was to admit our relationship
to you. I thought it would be years before you found out...but now that
everything's in the open, I feel SO relieved!" Kent managed to say.

	"Blaine doesn't know yet, does he?"

	"As I said, Maggie, we only found out ourselves last night!"

	"Rex! Aren't you glad that you don't have to face Mom and Dad? I
would LOVE to've seen the expression on their faces!"

	"I would have been disowned for sure!" Rex replied.

	"Yes...and they would have left me this dreadful house in Dad's
will. MY! MY! See how wonderfully things work out sometimes?"

	"I suppose..." Rex replied.

	"Well, let me go and let you two have your FIRST breakfast
together. I'll call you as soon as I talk to Blaine and let you know what
time to meet us at the country club!"

	"Uh...that'll be great, Maggie. Thanks." Rex said, giving in.

	"OH! And don't worry about cleaning up the rest of the Bates
Motel. I'll DO it myself or pay to have it done! How would the two of you
like me to refurbish this place with brand new furniture, draperies,
painting...THE WORKS! That'll be my wedding present for the two of you!"

	"Fine, Maggie...if you insist!"

	"I DO INSIST! Now let me go and leave you alone!" Maggie kissed Rex
and Kent on their cheeks and went out the front door, happy as a peacock!

<><><><><><><><><><><>

	Frank Whitcomb finished double-bogeying the ninth hole with a
muttered "Fuck!" after his ball finally dropped into the hole.

	"Wanna go for the back nine, Frank?" Blaine asked while tallying up
his own scorecard.

	Blaine had shot an impressive '44' on the front nine holes while
Frank had trailed with a dismal '54'.

	"No, Blaine, you're too good for me today. I think we'd better stop
here while I catch my breath and bow to your youth...once again," Frank
replied.

	"There you go again with that fucking 'youth' business! You're not
THAT old, Frank!"

	"Tell that to my tired old prostate..."

	"I'd rather not do ANY talking to your prostate or anyone else's
today. I've had my finger up dozens of rectums this week and God knows I
don't want to TALK to one."

	"I've had to probe a few assholes myself this week, Blaine."

	"It's too bad that neither of us is gay---then we could get a
little sexual excitement while we're doing our examinations.  Mix business
with pleasure, so to speak!"

	"Oh, I wanted to ask--how about that kid...you know, Epperson's
quarterback?...Did you get his reports back yet?"

	" Kent Stevenson? Yes, and it was bad news. So I'm asking if you'd
assist me with his surgery?"

	"What kind of carcinoma is it?"

	"At first the doctors at the lab said it was choriocarcinoma..."

	"Oh, Jesus! The quick kind!"

	"Yes, but after extensive testing, they finalized their report by
saying it was embryonal carcinoma."

	"Thank God for small favors! THAT we can treat without too much
complication," Frank concurred. "He's so young, healthy looking, and I'm
quite sure he would sire a whole litter of beautiful babies."

	"I'm gonna have him freeze some sperm for the future."

	"Wise thinking, Blaine."

	"Hey, old man! Would you like to go to breakfast or an early
brunch?"

	"Maybe, but right now I'm thinking about going to the club bar to
order a breakfast Bloody Mary."

	"Sounds great and very nutritional. Lots of Vitamin C!"

	The two partners put their golf bags and gear into the electric
cart and drove back to the club bar. The golf course was beautiful but way
too easy to ever host a PGA tournament. Still, nearly twenty years ago,
Jack Nicklaus and Arnold Palmer played an exhibition match for charity. It
was unfortunate that the game wasn't sanctioned because they both shot some
of the lowest scores in their careers. Arnold joked that it was just a step
above 'Goony Golf', but both had had a lot of fun at the Epperson Golf and
Country Club course.

	Blaine and Frank sat at the bar, stirring their spicy chilled
Bloody Marys with long stalks of celery.

	"Ahhh! Just what the doctor ordered!" Frank said.

	"Damn, it was hot out there, especially for this early in the
morning."

	"Do you believe what Vice-President Gore is proselytizing?"

	"You mean about global warming?"

	"Yes. Did you see his movie?"

	"'An Inconvenient Truth'? Yes, Maggie and I both watched it...then
she bought about three dozen copies of the DVD to distribute to her special
friends at her ladies' club luncheon. She and I both think that Gore is
like Noah when he was preaching that everyone should build an ark for the
oncoming disaster...and no one listened until the rains came. That fucking
asshole in the White House won't accept global warming until his popsicle
falls off its stick too soon."

	"What IS it with him? Can't he read? Doesn't he listen to
advisors?"

	"Two things, Frank, he DOES listen to his advisors but it seems
they have their own financial drums to beat and so they advise him
incorrectly...and I suppose it's really not his fault. America voted for a
man whose principles are as low as his I.Q.! Let Rove or Cheney tell him
something and he believes it because he thinks they know EVERYTHING, so why
should he investigate matters further?"

	"Did you see on TV where Donald Trump called him the worst
President in history and said that impeachment proceedings should begin
immediately for the way he lied to the American people."

	"They'd never get enough votes in Congress to convict him in an
impeachment. He's got JUST enough men in Congress under his control to
defeat any impeachment."

	Frank finished sipping his Bloody Mary through a straw and set the
glass down on the bar. "Dast I have the courage to order a second one?"

	"You shall indeed and I'll join you for another myself!" Blaine
replied, while holding up two fingers to the bartender. "Getting off the
subject of politics for a moment, Frank..."

	"Please don't start in on religion.", Frank interrupted. "I'm
enjoying myself too much on my Saturday morning off."

	Blaine laughed. "Religion? I was going to talk about sex."

	"Oh, then, rave on, MacDuff! We have the rest of the day to discuss
it!"

	"Frank, do you know what a glory hole is?"

	"Blaine, I said I was old...NOT ancient! Of course I know what they
are."

	"Have you ever seen one in a men's room?"

	"Oh, many! I...well, the first drink has hit me so I'm about to
reveal a few secrets from my youth."

	"Oh?"

	"Yes, when I was in college...just after the Civil War, I think,"
Frank chuckled. "Our dorm was wide open, twenty-four-seven. No locks on any
doors and every room could be invaded at any given minute by any given
college mate. So a private session of masturbation was out of the question
unless you could shoot off in a matter of seconds or didn't mind it while
someone walked in on you to watch. We had no cars back then and dating was
only with girls who were willing to walk to the movies or take a bus. Sex
with girls was totally out of the question. None of us, so far as I know,
was gay...BUT about half a mile down the road from the campus was a
Greyhound Bus station. Inside the men's room were six stalls with doors
WITH latches. Now picture this. Stalls two, four, and six...were for us
college guys. Stalls one, three, and five were for the, shall we say,
'entertainers', so to speak."

	"What do you mean?"

	"Cocksuckers! We didn't know who the fuck they were! It didn't
matter. My buddies and I formed lines at the doors of two, four, and six
and waited our turn to go inside the booth, unzip our pants, whip out our
dicks, push them into the glory holes and get off. Man! I had some of the
best blowjobs of my life...especially from the 'entertainer' who serviced
me in booth six."

	"The 'entertainers' WERE guys, weren't they, Frank?"

	"Hell, yes, they were guys. You don't think that the Greyhound
Corporate Office would allow women to service their glory holes, do you?"

	"Jesus, Frank! Didn't you ever feel you were participating in
homosexual activities?"

	"God, NO! I never saw the entertainer's face, his dick, his
ass...NOTHING. I didn't know if he was old, young, black, white, gay or
bi. I wasn't there to have a romantic fling or fall in love...man, I was
HORNY and that was the best way my college chums and I knew how to get
off. Ha! One Friday night after a week of exams, I was so fucking horny, I
stood in line four times for four different B.J.`s."

	"Good Lord, Frank! How could you ejaculate four times in a row?"

	"Very simply. The lines were so goddamned long, by the time I got
to the door to enter, I had already built up another orgasm to unload."

	"Jesus, Frank! What I was about to tell you seems so trite and
unimportant now!"

	"Tell me, and let ME be the judge."

	"Well, I had my first and only confrontation with a glory hole last
night."

	"Thank heaven you found out what they were and tried it before you
reached MY age. Did you enjoy it?"

	"Well...yes, I guess I did."

	"So? What are you acting so dramatic about it?"

	"Oh, a few reasons. First, it was the only time I'd ever cheated on
Maggie..."

	"Oh? What did your 'entertainer' look like? I bet you never saw him
or had any conversation with him. I'll bet even more that you know
absolutely NOTHING about him, so how can that be cheating on Maggie? It was
like masturbation with a little anonymous help."

	"I...I DIDN'T know anything about him until a few hours later."

	"You went back for more?"

	"No...but as it turns out, my anonymous 'entertainer' was one of my
patients!"

	"Oh, good God, NO!"

	"Yep!"

	"WOW! That's like getting your prom date pregnant when you're
losing your virginity! That's really a horrible example of beginner's
luck. How did you find out whom he was?"

	"According to him, he...he 'entertained' two more guys after
me...and the last one was homophobic, experienced a severe guilt trip and
beat the living daylights out of my patient. He's in the hospital and I had
to remove his spleen and patch him up. Took hours! That's why I was late
for our golf game this morning."

	"You haven't been to bed, have you?"

	"No. I was going to call you and bow out from our game, but I
thought the morning air and exercise would make me feel better."

	"Jesus! Does HE know that you were one of his...clients?"

	"Yes. He followed me from work just to be near me and when the
occasion arose for me to go to the bathroom to pee, he was mysteriously
waiting there...unbeknownst to me...to 'entertain' me. I didn't know who he
was until I got a call from County ER."

	"I...I don't know what to say, Blaine."

	"Ha! I don't either."

	The bartender brought the two additional Bloody Marys just as
Blaine's cell phone buzzed. He looked at the LED and saw that it was Maggie
calling.

	"Hi, sweetheart!" Blaine answered.

	"Hi, babe! How's your game going?"

	"Frank and I stopped after nine holes."

	"Oh? Are you still at the club?"

	"Yes, Frank and I are treating ourselves to a tomato juice, vodka
breakfast."

	"Yummy! I wish I was there to have one with the two of you."

	"That's OK, love---I finished mine and so now I'm drinking yours!
What's up? You seldom call me while I'm on the course. Did you get a call
about one of my patients?"

	"No, but I want you to make a reservation for four at the club for
dinner this evening."

	"Oh? With whom are we dining? Are Barbra Streisand and Doctor
Steven Kiley in town? Doctor House? Doctor McDreamy and his
spouse-of-the-week?"

	"No...just Epperson's newest and most handsome couple!"

	"God, Magpie! You want me to guess?"

	"No, because it would take you a month to ask about every name in
the telephone directory and you STILL wouldn't guess who they are!"

	"Do you want to tell me now?"

	"No, babynuts! I want to see your face when I tell you in person!
What time are you coming home?"

	"Maybe in about an hour. I might stop in to see Kent Stevenson at
Rex's before I come home..."

	"NO! Come home first...THEN you can go to Rex's."

	"Dear God! Don't tell me that Rex finally found THE one and has
asked her to marry him?"

	"You...you're only partially correct and I WON'T SAY ANY MORE! Just
come home first! Okay?"

	"Sure, but I'm more confused than ever about your gossip! See you
soon! I love you!"

	"I love you, too, honey. Give Frank a hug for me. Tell him to be
on-call just in case you have a heart attack when you hear my news! BYE!"
Maggie hung up the phone.

	Blaine sat there looking at his cell in a stupefied state of mind.

	"Bad news, Blaine?" Frank asked.

	"I don't know, Frank...but Maggie is sure fucking excited about
something!"

<><><><><><><><><>

(To be continued in "But Who Knows Where Or When?" chapter eight...next
week!)