Date: Tue, 21 Aug 2012 10:01:35 -0700 (PDT)
From: Damian <nvtahoeus@yahoo.com>
Subject: Luke and the Red Canvas Shoes - Part 4

This is the continuation of my story about Todd, 25, a physician assistant,
and Luke, 20, who first meet in a medical appointment that doesn't quite go
as either planned.  This posting is an in-depth relationship story that
will build slowly.  I plan to post subsequent chapters often, so please
check back.  Or let me know if you'd like to get an e-mail from me whenever
I post one.

No minors were harmed in the writing of this story, but if you are one
please go find something else to do.  Please do not reproduce this story in
any form without the permission of the author.  Your feedback is
appreciated.

Damian
nvtahoeus@yahoo.com


LUKE AND THE RED CANVAS SHOES


END OF PART 3

"Come here."  I put my arm on the top of the couch cushions right around
his shoulders as we met in the center of the couch, and he hesitantly laid
one arm in the narrow space between our bare legs, touching mine ever so
slightly.  This was heaven, but I still felt the need to tread carefully.
I had the sense that this was one very vulnerable young man -- which only
made him more attractive to me.

"The `real world' is what I call the one I didn't grow up in."

Luke took a deep breath, working up the nerve to start his story.


PART 4


My young, normally taciturn friend started out slowly, but soon the words
were flowing almost as fast as he could get them out.

I learned that Luke had grown up on an isolated farm near Fort Collins in
an extremely fundamentalist family, uncompromisingly run by a father with
an iron hand and a subservient but strict mother who never stood up to her
husband's mental -- and sometimes physical -- abuse.

Luke had an older brother, David, and they were home schooled.  Whatever
social life they had was with other church members who believed and acted
as they did.  His brother ran away from home when David was 16 and Luke was
13, forcing Luke into the unwelcome position of being the sole focus of his
controlling parents.  Wanting to avoid a repeat of his brother's sudden
exodus from the farm, they watched him like a hawk and never let him do
anything but work on the farm and go to church twice a week.

Unable to support himself for long, David reluctantly returned to the farm
several months later.  His inadequate education and lack of social skills
kept him from getting any meaningful employment, so he decided to throw
himself on his family's mercy and work on the farm in exchange for food and
shelter.  They took him back but never missed an opportunity to let him
know what a fool he'd been and how he'd never amount to anything if he
didn't do "God's Word" and obey his father.

Luke and his brother had been close growing up, but their relationship had
been strained by David's absence.  It was like they had to get to know each
other all over again, now that Luke had gone through puberty and his
brother had gone through the school of hard knocks.  Worse, Luke was having
trouble dealing with a physical attraction to him.  It wasn't surprising,
given how isolated they were, that Luke had few outlets for his new-found
sexual energies.  He kept his feelings to himself for five long years while
they worked side by side on the farm.  But the longer that David stayed on
the farm, the more like their father he became and Luke increasingly felt
he had no ally in his big brother.

One fateful day, David -- mud-covered and thinking he was alone -- decided
to take an impromptu shower under a hose and spray that he'd rigged up in
the barn.  Luke heard the water running and came to investigate.  He
stopped short when he realized that David was standing naked under it and
hid where David couldn't know that he was being observed.

The unexpected scene made him fully hard in seconds.  Lowering his pants,
he began masturbating while David showered not 30 feet away.  This was of
course a major sin for someone of his family's religion, but Luke couldn't
help it.  He was mesmerized by the beautiful male body that he'd so often
wanted so see but had not seen in several years.  In fact, he had never
seen an adult nude before.

Luke was just reaching orgasm when his father came along and caught him
staring at David and relieving himself at the same time.  This of course
resulted in a major blow-up on his father's part, which attracted David's
attention.  The two of them lit into Luke, calling him every name in the
book and telling him he was doomed to Hell for his sick perversions.  His
father told him to get packing immediately and never even let him say
good-bye to his mother, who was doing volunteer church work off the farm at
the time.  His dad at least let him pack a few things first, although he
didn't have many worldly possessions.

Having never been farther from home than Fort Collins, only a few miles
away, Luke was terrified of what lay ahead of him -- but also warily
optimistic that he could find a more satisfying life out from under his
parents' and brother's constant control.

He knew he had a grandfather in Denver, but it took him a few days to track
him down after he'd hitchhiked down to the city.  When he finally did find
him, Lloyd welcomed him with open arms, having some inkling of the kind of
life he'd had to endure with his son and daughter-in-law.  Lloyd had always
blamed her for getting his son involved in "that church," and they hadn't
communicated with him in several years.

"That was just two months ago," Luke said, "but it's turned my life around.
I finally feel for the first time that someone is on my side and cares
about me.  I never had that before."

"You know, Luke, that's an amazing story -- and such a sad one," I said,
squeezing his hand briefly.  "I've never known anyone who's grown up in
circumstances anything like that.  I think you're an amazingly brave and
resourceful guy to find your way out of it.  And do you know what else I
think?"

"No, what's that?"

"I think -- no, I know -- Lloyd isn't the only one in your corner.  I am,
too."

Luke looked up at me and then leaned against my shoulder, neither one of us
saying anything for at least a minute.  Suddenly -- as if spooked by his
own candor -- he stood up.

 "I'd better get going.  Thanks a lot for listening.  It meant a lot to me
just to be heard."

"Any time, Luke.  Can I ask you one question before you take off?"

"Sure."

"Does Lloyd know the details of why you had to leave home?"

"No, and please don't tell him, Todd.  I just told him it was my idea to
leave after Dad and I had a fight.  I'd be embarrassed for him to know what
we were fighting about."

"Everything you ever tell me is just between you and me.  I promise you
that.  How about coming back over here on Friday after your procedure?
I'll fix us something to eat.  Is 6:30 okay?"

"Sure.  Thanks -- I'd like that a lot."

We both stood up and walked to the door, with my arm around Luke's
shoulder.  I drew him to me and held him with both arms for a moment, and
he awkwardly hugged me back -- I was thrilled that I was finally breaking
through his self-imposed barrier with me.  I'd be counting the hours till
6:30 on Friday.

Luke made his exit, and I closed the door behind him and slumped down to
the floor.  I leaned my back again the inside of the door and hugged my
knees to my chest.  I had been deeply moved by his unexpected visit.  I had
no idea what he'd been through before coming to Denver, but his story
certainly helped me understand the way he had acted in Dr. Webberley's
office at our first meeting.

I had thought it kind of strange that someone 20 years old would have been
that uncomfortable being naked in front of another guy, but it was obvious
to me now that I had probably been the first person outside of his
immediate dysfunctional family who had ever seen him that way.  He'd been
home schooled and not allowed to live a normal life with friends.  Maybe
he'd never even been to a doctor before!

I thought about him a lot on Thursday and especially Friday, the day I knew
he was going for his endoscopy.  It was sweet that he'd wanted me there,
but of course that was impossible.  I hoped he had at least learned from me
how to put a hospital gown on right.  If not, the technician was going to
get quite an eyeful of Luke's bare front.

I slogged through the day on Friday, weighing patients with too much weight
and "blood-pressurizing" patients with too much hypertension.  My own
tension was plenty "hyper" as I thought about Luke's return visit that
night to my apartment.  I wanted him more with each passing day, but I knew
I had to pace myself and bring him along at his own comfort level with me.
In my mind I was his peer -- his equal -- but I knew that in his mind I was
probably someone not only older but with much more life experience.  In
that regard, of course, he was right.

Dr. Webberley had a full patient load that day, and we were running behind
schedule.  The last patient didn't leave the office until almost six
o'clock and Luke was coming at 6:30.  I tidied up the examination room and
rushed out the door.  Traffic was a bitch, and I didn't get home until
nearly 6:40.  I was exhausted, sweaty, and harried.

Luke was in my lobby when I walked in and stopped to retrieve my mail.  He
looked relieved to see me.

"Hi, Luke.  Sorry I'm late.  Did I keep you waiting long?"

"Only a few minutes.  I was getting a little worried that you'd forgotten I
was coming over."

"Not a chance of that," I said, squeezing his shoulder with my one free
hand.  "I'm all yours for the whole evening."  He grinned like a guy who
couldn't believe this was actually happening to him.  I asked him how
things went today as we rode up in the elevator to my floor.

"It wasn't my idea of a good time -- that's for sure."

"But it's over now.  Did you get any results yet?"

"No.  They said I'd have to see Dr. Webberley again for those."

I fished my door key out of my pocket and let us in.  I was still in the
same scrubs I'd been in all day and couldn't wait to get out of them and
into something else.

"Luke, why don't you help yourself to a beer while I get changed?  I've
gotta take a quick shower first, so just make yourself at home.  I'm going
to start the oven first and then we'll stick a frozen pizza in there when I
get back."

"Okay.  Mind if I look around?"

"Help yourself, but there's not much to see.  I live a pretty simple life.
You can turn the TV on if you want to."

I took the mail to the desk in my bedroom and then quickly doffed my scrubs
and underwear and walked naked to the bathroom.  Luke couldn't see me from
the living room, but I felt a chill of excitement that maybe he'd wander
back to where I was showering.  So I left the bathroom door open.

I stood under the hot water and tried to shake off the stress of the day --
and the images of the patients I'd seen.  There hadn't been one halfway
attractive guy all day.  I soaped myself all over and rinsed off.  Stepping
out of the shower, I grabbed a towel, wondering if Luke was anywhere
nearby.  Just as I was finished drying off, I heard a shrill sound over the
hum of the bathroom exhaust fan.  God, it was the smoke detector!

"Todd!!"

I quickly wrapped my towel around my waist and ran to the kitchen, where
light smoke was wafting around the ceiling.  Luke was standing there
looking terrified, his hands covering his mouth and nose, his body rigid
with fear.  Had he never heard one of these alarms before?

I quickly turned the oven off and opened the oven door.  I discovered a
piece of Texas toast in there, left over from a meal a night or two ago.
The smoke alarm was still shrieking loudly, so I grabbed a step stool from
the utility closet and set it in place.  Pushing the button didn't do
anything, so I proceeded to try to remove the cover so I could get to the
battery to disengage it.

As I reached up, my abs contracted and the only thing that was
"disengaging" was my towel.  I felt it loosening but decided to focus my
attention instead on the smoke alarm.  I knew it was inevitable that the
towel would be on the floor in no more than three seconds.

Three...two...one...off -- I was right.

The damn alarm cover finally came loose, and I was able to get to the
9-volt battery.  I looked down at Luke, who looked a little stunned.  He
picked up the towel from the floor but didn't hand it back to me right away
because both of my hands were still busy above my head for a few seconds.
With the battery finally free, I reached for Luke's hand for balance so I
could step down from the ladder safely.  His eyes were all over me.  I just
let him have a good long look -- it was only fair after the physical I'd
done on him.

"Well, that was exciting.  Sorry about that.  I'd forgotten about that
piece of toast."

"Would you like your towel back?" he finally said, with a little grin.  It
was nice to see him smiling for a change.

I took it from him but just hung it around my neck.

"I guess this sort of makes us equal now," I said, grinning back at him.
"I've seen you, and you've see me."

"Well, not really equally.  I was hard and shot off in front of you."

"If you keep staring at me like that, I'm going to get hard, too."

"I'm sorry, but there's a reason I'm staring, Todd."

"What's that?"

"I'm wondering why your...uh...thing looks so much different than mine."

Luke looked away momentarily out of apparent embarrassment, but soon his
eyes were back on my tool again.

I looked down at myself.

"Oh, I see what you're getting at.  But first let's call a spade a spade.
There's nothing wrong with saying cock or penis or dick."

"There was in my family."

"Um...well...that's too bad...but back to your original question.  I've
been circumcised and you haven't.  You've heard about circumcision, haven't
you?"

"I guess so, but I haven't seen one before.  What did they do to you and
when?"

I was getting a little nervous now with all the prolonged attention to my
bare manhood, which was starting to get a bit longer as a result.

"The tube of skin on me, like the one that covers the head of your penis,
was surgically removed shortly after I was born.  Most American boys are
circumcised -- some for religious reasons and some just out of custom.
They say it's easier keep your dick clean without a hood, but a lot of
people believe it's unnecessary and unnatural to remove it.  Except for
your hood, our dicks are just the same, except that yours is probably more
sensitive."

By now I'd been naked in front of Luke for well more than five minutes.  I
really needed to get dressed or risk getting a full hard-on, so I decided
I'd said enough on the subject for now.

"Want a tour of the bedroom, Luke?  You can help me decide what to put on."
I started down the hall and felt his eyes riveted on my bare ass all the
way.  He followed me and I hung up my wet towel and started for my bureau,
taking my time rummaging through it for just the right thing.  He was
wearing a t-shirt and shorts, as usual, so I put on something similar.  I
thought about forgoing underwear, but I needed something to keep my
half-hard junk from flopping around too flagrantly the rest of the evening.
It had already had far more attention than either of us ever expected.

Of course, I would rather have turned to him naked, strip off what little
he was wearing, and make mad passionate love to him on my bed, but I knew
it wasn't yet the right time.  I wasn't even officially out to him yet --
although he had every reason to strongly suspect -- and I knew, despite
being 20, that he was still an innocent man-child who had hardly an ounce
of self-esteem or even self-awareness.  It was hard (literally), but I
would wait.

Since the smoke smell still permeated the apartment, I opened some windows
and we went out for pizza.  We talked a little more about his upcoming
medical procedure and about how he was adjusting to life in Denver with his
granddad.  He said it had been eye-opening for him to experience what life
was like with some real respect and affection -- essentials that most of us
take for granted but that had been missing in his home of origin.

What he needed now was a job and an education, but with his anemia he
didn't have what it took to pursue either for the time being.  The best he
could do was study for his GED, which he'd been spending several hours a
day on, with Lloyd's encouragement.

He didn't even have a driver's license yet, since his parents forbade it.
All he had ever driven was a tractor.  So he now had to get around on foot
and on the city buses.

I offered to drop him off at Lloyd's house, but he asked me if we could go
back to my place and he'd walk home from there.  I was wondering what more
he wanted by doing that, and I found out.

When we entered my apartment, I was relieved to see that the smoke and odor
had dissipated.  I took my shoes off, as per my usual habit, and I noticed
that Luke followed suit, so I knew he wasn't ready to leave just yet.

"Would you like a bowl of ice cream before you go home?" I asked.

"Sure -- that'd be nice."

I filled a couple of bowls, and we sat on the couch.  He was starting to
get more comfortable around me -- rather than sitting stiffly with his
knees together, he put one knee up and tucked his foot under his other leg,
like I was sitting.  That meant that we were facing each other.

"This is really good.  We almost never had ice cream at home.  Dad
considered it a luxury.  I've probably gained five pounds at Granddad's
house because he has it on hand all the time."

We talked a little more, but I was starting to fade after a long day at
work.  And I had to go in for half a day tomorrow to catch up on my
paperwork and get the office ready for Monday morning.  Luke noticed me
yawning.

"I guess I'd better go now," he said, getting up and putting his shoes back
on.  I followed him to the door.  Instead of reaching for the doorknob,
however, he turned and faced me.

"Would you please hug me again?" he said, looking up at me with those
soulful puppy-dog eyes of his.  If I hadn't been hooked on this guy before,
I sure was now.

"I wouldn't let you out of here without one," I replied.

Suddenly we were in each other's arms, embracing tightly for the first
time.  I held him around his shoulders, and he held me around my waist.
With his shoes on and mine off, Luke was now only a couple of inches
shorter than me, and we fit together nicely.  The sight of him, the feel of
him, even the smell of him intoxicated me.  I never knew I could be this
excited about anyone.

"You may not believe this, but you're the first person I've ever hugged
like this.  My parents and brother certainly never did any such thing.
Granddad's a nice man, but we don't hug tight like this."

"Well, whenever you need one, you know where to find me."

"Yeah...I do...thank you.  You really do care about me, don't you?"

"More than you know, my friend.  More than you know."


After Luke left I was in such turmoil for the rest of the evening.  What
had started out as a little visit over frozen pizza had unexpectedly
resulted in me being totally naked on a ladder in front of my new friend.
While he seemed happy that it had happened -- and, to be honest, I was too
-- it only caused me to have more questions about where our relationship
was headed.

Because of the 5-year age difference and the stark differences in our
backgrounds and education, I was feeling more like a big brother to Luke
than a potential lover.  I knew he looked up to me (and not just on that
ladder) and wanted to be close.  But how close?  Did he have a sexual
interest in me, like I had in him?  If I tried to seduce him, would he get
scared and run off?  Or would he follow my lead with all the enthusiasm I
felt for him?  I wasn't sure yet.

I hadn't ever been in a situation like this.  I was normally a very
self-confident guy who knew exactly what he wanted and how to go after it
-- and never had a doubt that the other guy felt the same way about me.  I
may not be the greatest "catch" on the street, but I do pride myself on
having an above-average body (okay, it's smokin' hot, if the looks I get at
the gym are any indication) and an agreeable personality -- despite the way
I'd kicked Brian out of my bed unceremoniously not long ago.

All I knew was that I wanted Luke like nobody I'd ever wanted before.  But
I also wanted to give him time to get completely comfortable with me.  We'd
made a lot of progress in a short time, but I wanted see more joy in those
eyes of his, rather than the fear and forlornness that had seemed to
radiate from them up most of the time until this week.

As I slipped into dreamland I hugged my pillow tightly and pretended that
it was Luke.



(To be continued in Part 5 soon)



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Damian
nvtahoeus@yahoo.com