Date: Sat, 23 Mar 2013 23:51:02 +0000 From: S Kay <s.watkins@live.co.uk> Subject: With Regret Chapter 12 With Regret By Samantha Kay Copyright Protected 2012-2013 Chapter 12 We got in the car, still tearful and shivering as I clumsily attempted to put the key in the ignition, my hands were trembling and wet. I still can't believe he cheated on me... The engine growled, and as I put the car heating on the initial blast of air was cold, making us shudder more. "Are you coming home?" I whispered as I stared at the waterfall of rain gushing down the windscreen. My stomach was churning, my heart aching as I recalled his words, telling me he'd kissed someone. Despite my limbs feeling weak, I had the urge to go find who he'd kissed and smack them. How could Jacob do that? He isn't supposed to be like that, he's supposed to be the good one... -But I have no right to say or feel anything. I cheated first, so many times... I couldn't even look at him. My throat felt uncomfortably tight as I faught back the need to cry. Switching the wipers on, I set off driving despite not having an answer from Jacob yet. I just needed to do something, as though it would actually be a distraction from the pain inside. My skin under my navy shirt was plagued with a sharp sting from the cold wet fabric clinging to it. Man I could do with a hot shower right about now. With Jacob... I wished the coldness would numb me, but the nausea and hurt was so raw, so overwhleming that my eyes were watering and I had to bite my lip to stop myself from bursting into tears. . "Ok." Jacob uttered. I glanced across at him –he was sunk down low into the seat, his arms crossed with his chin on his chest glaring out the window. I felt myself smile a little, if I hadn't known it was because he was cold and trying to warm up, I would have accused him of looking like a sulky teenager. A part of me wanted to place a hand on his thigh, but the stabbing pain corrupting my insides stopped me, telling me I'd feel worse if I tried to get close to him. He'll only push you away... The drive home was slow but not only because the roads were bad. We hadn't spoken to one another. I didn't want to say anything at the risk of starting an argument, making him change his mind about coming home. I doubted he would stay the night, but even if he came for just an hour, it was a start. My chest felt heavier with every mile I drove, nerves getting the better of me as we neared our home. I hope we can get somewhere this time...no big row, no drama. But how can I just forget about what he's just done? It really fucking hurts. But to think of what I've been doing? The pain Jacob must be feeling at my betrayal. I dread to imagine it. How could I ever expect him to forgive me..? Jacob sat up straight once I'd parked the car. Looking past me to see our house, his eyebrows wrinkled. I noticed his fingers fidgeting, and his chest rising and falling heavily. "What's wrong?" I asked him, the tight sensation in my gut worsening. "Nothing." He whispered as he then looked at me, his eyes moist. "I just, don't think I'm ready to stay the night. You ok to take me back to my Dad's later?" "If I'm not able to change your mind, then yeah, sure." I smiled weakly. When Jacob smiled back my heart was in my throat and my insides did a flip. You have no idea how long I've waited to see you smile again... ~*~ Once we got inside and I shut the front door behind us, we just stood and looked at one another. Our eyes fixed together, as my heart froze into place. Jacob was shivering, to the point that his breathing had become staggered. His hair was dripping wet through, water trailing down his face. He still looked gorgeous; especially with his pretty green eyes and flushed cheeks. "You. You wanna get a shower?" I stuttered; as I glanced down to see his shirt sticking to his stomach. My cock actually twitched, he looked so sexy. Jacob nodded slowly, before stepping closer to me. I swallowed hard, my mind picturing what I hoped he was going to do. Take my hand, take me with you. Kiss me. "I'm sorry, again, about what I did." His bottom lip quivered, his voice cracked. "I feel so guilty Phil." I quickly took him into my arms, the feeling of his cold wet shirt against me shocked my skin. The moisture from his tears on his cold face felt sticky as he buried it in my neck. The contact was electrifying though, regardless of the pain it jolted into my heart. I inhaled deeply, taking in his scent, a fading sweet-smelling cologne mixed with a slight muskiness. "I love you Jacob. Please don't beat yourself up about what you did –I forgive you ok? I swear." I swallowed hard. Forgive him? It's barely even sunk in yet... Jacob gave way to a sob and tightened his arms around my waist. I gave him a squeeze as a long staggered breath exhaled from my crushed lungs. We can get through this. We have to get through this... Jacob pulled away, before looking up at me with his glistening eyes. "I need us to be ok Phil. I love and hate you at the same time, but I can't lose you. You have no idea how much I'm hurting, but I can't bare the thought of being without you." I had to bite my lip to stop myself from bursting into tears; like a toddler who had just fallen off a climbing frame. "I'll do whatever I can to make you happy again Jacob, to get you to trust me again. I swear I'll spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I need you, I love you, and there's no way I can ever lose you." Jacob suddenly kissed me, hard. His warm lips awakening every single nerve in my body. I clutched at his shirt, pulling him in even closer. My tongue slipped into his mouth, dancing passionately with this; savouring the mild taste of beer I got from him. He moaned as his hands grabbed the back of my neck and he pushed himself into me, my back pressing up against the wall. "Oh Jacob." I gasped, as he unexpentantly rubbed his crotch into mine. "I want you to make love to me." He whispered with a husky –and seriously sexy- tone. "In our bed." To be continued... Feedback good or bad is always appreciated! Check out the website for this story on: http://storywithregret.blogspot.co.uk/ Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/samanthakays I also have another story, called Forbidden Crush, available on Nifty and http://storytimetrysts.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/forbidden-crush-part-9.html