Date: Fri, 31 Jan 2003 20:10:35 -0500
From: TgrPaw@gmail.com
Subject: Can You Spare A Quarter - Epilogue

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Can You Spare a Quarter?
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Dedicated to "D":

   We didn't meet this way, it probably wouldn't have been anything like
   this if we had met this way, but if we had, I hope it might have been
   something like this.   {{{{ hugs }}}}

Disclaimer:

   Names of people, places, companies, and so forth are completely
   fictional.  While this story draws inspiration from real events which
   involved real people, it is nonetheless a complete work of fiction.

Copyright:

   2002; All rights reserved.

Comments:

   Email can be sent to TgrPaw@gmail.com

   Flames, hate mail, and similar things will be ignored.

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15. Epilogue

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Graham relaxed on the sofa with Cindy, his hand gently petting her
head as she rested it on his leg.  Dark Side of the Moon was playing
on the stereo.  It was an old CD, but Graham too was getting old now.
He still liked it even if mentioning Pink Floyd these days merely brought
blank stares from the younger generation.  He listened to Gilmour's guitar
work while Waters' words filled his mind as he looked out the window at
the cold wind blowing the tree branches to and fro.  When Graham went
for walks now he felt the cold wind more than he used to.  That was
the way of things though.  Time always rushing forward never pausing,
never slowing down, never standing still.  Where did it all go?

Graham and Cindy looked up as Jamie came into the room.  He was carrying
a tray with cookies on it.

"I invited Jason and his parents to come for tea," said Jamie as he
placed the tray on the coffee table.

Graham looked up and was about to respond but Jamie was already heading
out of the living room.  It had been same every day for the last while.
Graham could sense something was up with Jamie, but he didn't know
what exactly.  Jamie had come out of his shell so much during the last
few years since he had come to live with Graham.  There had been the
terrible trauma at the beginning when things had almost ended before
they began, then the adoption and them getting used to each other, the
trials as they both worked to exorcise the demons buried deep within
Jamie's psyche, all of them positive steps forward in Jamie's journey.
Suddenly however, that trend had seemed to reverse itself in the last
month or so.  Jamie was much quieter, keeping to himself a lot more,
talking less, going for long walks on his own.  Even Cindy had noticed,
not being allowed to go along lately when Jamie would go out.

Graham worried about Jamie, but at the same time he had seen these
reflective periods before.  They were the norm at the beginning,
then gradually less so over the following years.  Now they seemed to
be coming back again.  Graham sensed a turning point was arriving and
for the first time in a long while, he felt scared.  Not for Jamie,
but for himself strangely enough.  Jamie wasn't a boy anymore, and
Graham suspected the time was coming soon when Jamie would complete
the final transformation into manhood.  Much as he wanted for that to
happen for Jamie, Graham knew that when it occurred he would hurt inside.
The scared, hurt, young boy he'd met, helped, and then taken care of,
would be gone forever when that day arrived.

Regardless though, there was nothing that could be done.  Only Jamie would
know when the time had arrived for his transformation.  It could not be
hurried, it could not be delayed - nor should it be.  Graham knew his most
important task at this point was to do nothing.  Nothing.  The hardest
thing of all to do.  Graham knew that all things came in their time.

Time.  How was it that music did this to him?  Especially this kind
of music.  Things seemed so much clearer to Graham when he listened and
let it flow around and into him.  A knock on the door stirred Graham
out of his musings and he got up to open it.

"Frank, Kathy, Jason," said Graham in greeting.  "Please come in."

"Do you know what's going on?" asked Jason in a concerned tone.

"No Jamie won't talk about whatever it is," replied Graham.

"He won't talk to me about it either," continued Jason.  "He's got
me worried."

"He's not usually like this," said Kathy.  "Jamie's had good days
and bad ones, but usually he's so bright and cheerful."

"He'll let us know when he's ready to," cautioned Frank.

"I'll go up and let him know we're here," offered Jason as he headed
upstairs to Jamie's room.

"Please come in and sit down," said Graham.  "Jamie's put out some bits
and I'll see about some tea."

Graham went into the kitchen and busied himself with making the tea.
Opening a cupboard he selected a tin of flavourful Earl Grey.  Graham
spooned some into the tea strainer and put it in the teapot ready to
add water as soon as it came to the boil.

Jason came into the kitchen as Graham poured the water into the teapot
and wordlessly picked up the cups and saucers that Graham had laid out
and took them into the living room.  As Jason laid them out and then sat
down heavily, Frank and Kathy knew that something was up.  Graham came in
and put the teapot down on the coffee table next to the tray of cookies
and sensed that Jason knew something.

"Pop?" said Jamie.

Graham turned and looked towards Jamie, who was standing in the doorway
of the living room.  'Pop'.  Graham loved when Jamie called him that, he
viewed that title as the greatest honour he had ever had bestowed on him.
At the same time however, Jamie never used it unless something really
big was on his mind.  Then Graham noted that Jamie had something in his
hand - a backpack.  The same backpack Jamie had had clutched in his hand
on that dreadful day years back.  A cold chill went down Graham's spine.
The moment had arrived.

"Yes Jamie?" replied Graham sitting down in an armchair.  "We're all
here."

Jamie came fully into the room and sat down on the floor positioned
midway between Graham on one side and Frank, Kathy, and Jason sitting
in the couch on the other, the backpack was clutched in his hands.
Cindy sensing the tense mood came close to Graham and began to whine.
Graham placed his hand on her to comfort the dog.

All through the years that Jamie had been with Graham, he had always
kept his old backpack.  It had been Jamie's safety net whenever he'd
needed to run.  It had saved him several times in the past when things
had gotten bad and he'd had to flee.  No matter how safe he might have
felt somewhere for a period of time, he'd always ended up having to
leave and then it had taken care of him.  Whenever people or events had
turned on Jamie, his wits and his backpack had saved him.  After he had
come to live with Graham, he still kept it.  It had been six years now
without any need for Jamie to worry or run, and he had always kept it.
Now it was sitting on the floor between Jamie and his adopted family.

"This was my old life," Jamie said as he unzipped the top of the pack.

Everyone sat frozen in place and could hardly breathe.  Cindy was
motionless, her alert eyes watching Jamie's every move, her ears erect.

Jamie reached into the pack and pulled out a small old pair of blue jeans.
Battered and shabby, torn in places and dirty, they had a distinct odour
about them that took Graham's mind instantly back in time.  Back to a
walkway leading to a subway station.  Looking at them distantly for a
moment, Jamie wordlessly set them down on the floor.

Reaching again into the pack, Jamie removed a jean jacket which he then
placed on top of the jeans.  A couple of pairs of underwear emerged
and joined the pile.  Then an old white T-shirt came out of the pack,
there were blood stains on it.  Jamie looked at it for a long time,
his eyes staring right through the shirt.

Putting his hand into the pack again, Jamie brought out a couple of
Polaroid pictures of a young boy.  Graham saw that one of them looked like
Jamie when he had first met him.  Kathy noticed that the other had the
same face, but the boy in the picture was naked.  There were no smiles
evident in either of the images.  Jamie dropped them both on top of the
pile of clothing.  Through all of this not a word was spoken by anyone,
even Cindy was totally silent.

Jamie got to his feet and then bent down to pick up the pile of items
from the coffee table.  He walked, carrying them, to the far side of
the room.  Jamie took the pictures from the top of the pile of things,
looked at them one more time, and then dropped them into the fireplace.
The images on them faced outwards as they landed in the smoldering embers.
For a fraction of a second Frank saw the pained face of a hurt boy in one
of them before they shriveled up and burst into flames.

Then one by one Jamie slowly dropped into the fire the old clothes in
his hands.  Clothes from when he was that hurt boy in the pictures.
First the old jeans went in.  Then the jacket, and then the underwear.
When only the T-shirt remained, Kathy broke her silence when Jamie
started to move his hand to add it to the flames.

"Please Jamie, could I have that?" asked Kathy.  "I would like to keep
it so I never forget what it means if a child is hurt."

Jamie looked back towards Kathy and saw tears rolling down her face.
Jamie walked towards Kathy and placed the shirt in her hands.

Turning towards the now empty backpack that was sitting on the floor,
Jamie walked to it and picked it up.  Moving once again to the fireplace,
Jamie dropped it too into the flames.  He stared into the fire as it at
first licked at and then finally engulfed the backpack in a burst of light.

Jamie stood there a long time looking into the fire, watching the flames
erase the final traces of the demons that had haunted him for so long.
Jamie finally knew now deep in his heart that he no longer needed to run,
that he was safe at last.

Jamie walked back towards the armchair and sat down very carefully on
Graham's lap.  Jamie was no longer the short thin undernourished boy he
had been when Graham had first met him.  He was six feet tall now and a
strong muscular young man.  Graham barely came up to Jamie's shoulders
and was an increasingly fragile old man.

Graham couldn't recall Jamie ever having sat on his lap before this,
even when he was much younger.  However, despite their size and weight
difference, for this one moment Jamie felt as light as a feather to
Graham.

Cindy pushed her muzzle against Jamie's leg and whined.  Jamie reached
down and petted her on the head.  Then Jamie put his arms around Graham
and said, "It's good to be home, Pop."

[end]

                               *** *** *** ***

Author's note:

The story of 'Jamie' that you have just read, is based upon the true life
experiences of a real young man.  Most of the events described actually
occurred, although suitable adjustments have been made for the purposes of
dramatization and to ensure the continued privacy of everyone involved.
The main characters in the story aside from Jamie (e.g., Graham, Kathy,
Frank, and Jason) are composites based on the actual people who helped
Jamie.

In case the reader might be wondering, the last chapter is not fictional.
It actually did occur as described.  The author would also like to take
this opportunity to thank the large numbers of people that took time to
write in as the story was gradually written and posted.  Your notes have
been very kind and gracious and have meant a great deal.  Lastly the
author would like to salute the real-life 'Jamie' upon whom the story
is based.  I consider myself so terribly fortunate to have "bumped into"
him way back when and have valued each moment with him since that day.
In my eyes he truly embodies the concept of bravery.

The story ends here, though the life of Jamie continues in the real world.
Most recently he graduated from high school and is considering what the
future holds for him.  Will there be any further tales of Jamie's past
or present?  That's hard to say just now with the adventures of his new
life continuing to unfold.