Date: Mon, 23 Jul 2007 07:48:11 +0000
From: Cal Nowl <calnowisgreat@hotmail.com>
Subject: catching-the-coach   3rd instalment

Hi guys, thanks again for all your support. The last segment was pretty
straight forward and purely sex based. This segment has no sex in it but
for all you readers who are longing to get more out of the characters, this
is for you. This taps into a few revelations on what Drew, the narrator, is
going through at this point. It also has expands slightly on Vance and
Peter. I just continue to write and I feel like after 6 pages of text and
dialog I still have nothing more than I did when I started. But this is a
good stopping point and very dramatic. I call this chapter "Breaking
Points" in the Catching the Coach series. I hope that you people enjoy this
as much as the sex. I feel like the story is getting to be pretty complex
and found it unfair to not to build the dynamic complexity of the
characters as well. Please continue to give me feedback.

Thanks so much, Calbin


Life was out of control. What had I become?...... At first, confusing as
this all was, it was kind of an adventure. It was really hot and mildly
dangerous, now it was becoming a reality I was all too uncomfortable with.
I felt like a drug addict trapped in a world I had somehow managed to
create.  I was numb and somber walking the 5 blocks home.  It was just now
4 o'clock.  My brain was swimming around in my head.  I felt a little numb,
form shock, form doubt.  See what they don't tell you is that sex, sex can
fuck you up.

I had always been a good kid. Abstaining from sexual activity, and taking
pride in the fact that I did so. I wasn't easy. I realize now that It made
me feel almost better than everyone else.  Of course I had fantasies and
behind a locked door and in front of a computer screen, I was probably
nastier than the worst of them.  But somehow that didn't count. Somehow my
clean image more than satisfied any longing to feel special. I was
intelligent and charming and that was enough.

Now that I had crossed the barrier between fantasy and reality, I realized,
fantasy was much better. Because after the fantasy was over, you could
still sleep each night and wake up in the morning and live with your
self. I had become somewhat of a whore.

Now I know that in most of your minds I was just a teen experimenting with
sex: Innocent and simple. But I had higher standards for myself. I was
better than that. And this situation was far from innocent and simple. You
see. Lurking behind my poise and charming exterior was something far less
put together and sure. I was insecure. I was very out there but also had
some inner bits that never showed and this level of mystery made me feel
more ok with myself. This experience it seemed had ripped a huge hole in me
and all my mysteries were leaking out.

Numbness is all I can feel now. Thinking about it. I didn't really enjoy
the sex. I just wanted to feel like a success. Like I was desired and that
I was good in the sack. If I was going to loose something it had better be
worth it. I had better be the best fuck anyone had ever had. It was true. I
was a whore. And I saw no end in site.

Now it seemed the fun was over before it started. I was feeling shitty
about my actions and more than that. I may not even have time to heal on my
own.  I had a hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach as I realized once
again that there was another party involved. And the worst part was I
didn't know who or what terror it might cause.

I made it to my house and just threw my bag in the porch and sat on the
swing. I had no idea where to go from here. I needed to tell someone so
bad. I thought I was going to explode. I began to cry. Every tear felt like
cold wet knife slicing my face up. I wanted to badly to just let them roll,
but they began to itch as they neared my chin. Wiping off the pain so
obviously expressed on my skin. I began to once again feel the numbness
creep over me. I just wished I could hold coach Wells have his strong
embrace tell me that things would be ok.  This was so fucked up.

I managed to momentarily gather my senses and lift myself off the swing and
go inside.  "Honey?"  "Yea, mom" "Your father is working late tonight, and
I don't feel like cooking.  Will you go pick up pizza."

I just wanted to collapse and sleep for a year.

"Yea, I guess so mom" "What's wrong, did everything go ok at school today?"
"Yea mom, I'm just really tired."  "Are you sick, you are acting so
stranger."  "No mom, I'm fine, just call the pizza place so I can get home"
"O K, I can tell everything is just fine. I'll leave you alone though."

I hopped into my super ultra cool 1995 navy caddy. My grand mother gave it
to me and my parents decided that it was best for me to drive around a
dependable yet ugly car for a few years just so that I would appreciate a
new cool car when the day came. I rarely drove it, only when I had to. Not
because it was ugly. After all high school is the only time you can have a
terrible car and still be cool, it was almost expected. I rarely drove it
because I lived only a few block from the school and these days were filled
with school and football practice and sleep accept for on the weekend in
which I was out with friends in their car if we were going anywhere. And
there were a lot of places around town I could walk easily and rather
enjoyed it when the weather was nice. And September was the perfect time to
walk during the afternoons. Morning and nights were cold but for 5 blocks
not unbearable.

I drove the 2 miles to the pizza place where we always ordered pizza. The
Pizza Joint, haha, that name always made me laugh because most of the guys
who worked there were pot heads so it was such a fitting name. One of those
workers was none other than Vance.

"DREW DOG!"  "Vance dog!"  "What up buddy?.... hey u missed practice
today."  "Yea, detention!"  "right, right"

It was almost 5 now and Vance had just arrived at work for the evening
shift after practice.

"You know coach is gonna tear your ass up tomorrow during practice!"

My heart stopped. I looked at him for a couple of seconds before I realized
what he was talking about. Coach makes us run if we miss
practices. Especially for detention.

"Yea, I don't care... I'll be fine" "Dude, what's your deal you are so
bummed and pissed acting lately."  "Nothing man, I just have a lot going on
lately."  "Ok man, well you should think about going out to the lake Friday
night like I said. The cheerleaders are doing some stupid sleepover shit. I
would stick around and see if I could get Tess to sneak out but im kinda
pissed at her right now, im not sure what we are. She so freaked out on me
the other night. I wanted to do it and she said she didn't feel like it and
when I tried again she so punched my in the side and called me a dick. She
totally left me there all horny and sad. Bitch!"

"Yea, Totally" I said with a sarcastic tone "Fine then Drew make fun of
me. All I know is that the boys are going out to have a good time full of
testosterone and no estro...a... " "Estrogen Vance, its Estrogen" "yea that
stuff... And we are going with or without you."  "Ok man look, ill probably
go but I'm not making any promises."  "Yahooo, yea... its gonna fuckin
rock."  "What ever, just give me the damn pizza I ordered."  "Gladly sir,
One sausage and one Pep. Extra cheese on both, medium and hand tossed will
there be anything else."  "NO!"  "13.06" "Thanks" "See ya Drew"

It was always so rude to Vance. I liked him really I did, but he was the
type that you almost had to be rude to just to keep from punching him in
the face. He was an idiot, and that was fine, but I can be so patient with
an idiot before I really get annoyed. Most days he was cool though and he
never seemed to take offense to my bitchiness, I think he knew that I
really like him and also that he was way too much for most people to
handle.

I pulled into the driveway. Walked inside and threw the keys and pizza on
the table. Opened up the box and took 3 slices.

"MOM!... THE PIZZA IS HERE."  "OK hun, just leave it on the table... Oh
your coach called and said that you need to comeo down to the school as
soon as possible, he needs to see you. I told him you would be right
along."  "Which coach mom?"  "Im not sure, I think it started with a W"
"Uahh... Coach White or Wells" "Yea hon" "Mom which one?"  "I dint know
just go see"

Great! I had no idea what this was about or what I was about to get myself
into. I robotically shoved the rest of the pizza down and walked out the
door.

Arriving at the school I saw no truck, but the coaches office light was
on. I entered the gym and once again walked to the end where the coaches
door was shut. I knocked.

"Yes?"  "It's a ...Drew Miles..."  "Come on in"

I shut my eyes for a sec and then pushed open the door and say no one... I
walked in and around the corner.

"Drew!"

I nearly shit myself.

It was Peter.

"Pete,... What the hell."  "Sit down Drew."  "Whats going on?"  "Sit the
fuck down!.... now!"

I did as I was told, almost instinctively. And what else would I have
done. Instinct was all I had left. My head sure as hell was not there.

"Care to explain to me what the fuck is going on Drew?"  "I... uh... "
"Yea" "Peter you are the one calling me up here pretending to be a
coach. You tell me what the Fuck is going on" "Oh now were are getting
brave... look I was here today"

shit I thought... It was peter

"Don't even try to make an excuse... I know what I saw... it was steamy in
here but I know what I saw"

"Look Pete!"

"Fucking save it... I watched you fuck the shit out of someone and I want
to know who it was."

I was floored... Relieved... but only for a moment... Pete saw enough to
know it was me but Coach White was so close to our ages that he could have
been any of the other guys at our school.

"And why the hell didn't you tell me you were gay... Dude we have been
tight for so long now... I would have been totally cool with
it. Hell... I've even thought about jerking one out with you a time or
two."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing... It was too much to process... all
too weird and too fast... I was relieved that half of my secret was safe
but I was having to deal with the other half and wait... did he just was he
wanted jerk off with me.

"Pete, look. You have to understand that you just scared the shit out of me
and now you are outing me and telling me that you want to jerk off with
me. You have to understand how odd this is for me."

"Ha ha, I have a gay friend, its pretty new and odd for me too."

"Look Pete. I'm not ready to talk about this now. Please please keep all
this a secret. I will fill you in on it soon I promise but I cant right
now."

"Well that's just not going to do" Peter said as he stepped closer. Face to
face with me.

I was sitting on a tale backed against the wall with no where to go.

"Pete, ... I" "What's the matter you don't want me. Common man, your gay
that's cool. I'm kinda toying with the idea myself. We're both hot and
there's no one else here... tell me you don't want it."

"Pete it's not that... I just can't do this right now."  "What... Too tired
from fucking that guys brains out today... common,... who was it?"  "Pete,
look... you are hot ok and we can talk about all this later, but right now
I just can't"

"Fine, Drew, ... what good is having a gay friend if you can't get a little
action when ever you want huh...?"

I was stunned, confused, and a bit outraged at that statement. I leaped up
from the table and pushed Peter against the lockers behind him.

"Pete you don't know fucking anything. You don't know me. You don't know
what is going on here. Don't fucking act like you do."

Terror swept Pete's face... We both stood there me holding him by the shirt
collar.

I let go and all of the sudden I felt my nose burn and my eyes start to
glaze over. They began to swell. I fell into Pete and slid down him onto
the floor.

Pete had no idea what was going on. He had called me there assuming he
would get to mess around a little. What he got was to see one of his best
friends have a break down right there in front of him; right there at his
feet.

"Drew I ... "

He knelt down and awkwardly placed his hands on my shoulder.  All I could
do was sob.  I then pulled him close and wrapped my arms around him and
buried my face in his chest.

"I'm so fucked up man... My world is falling apart around me... Everything
is so complicated."

Peter could find words to save his life. He just held me there and he
realized that this was serious. This was not a game. His attempts to play
around with me had brought on a melt down that he was not prepared for. His
eyes began to fill with tears as well and still no words came.

Pete rested against the lockers with my arms wrapped around his torso and
my face in his chest for several minutes. I slowly rose to my feet wiping
the tears from my face from the second time today. I just left him there
stunned in the floor and walked out to the office, then the gym, them home.
No doubt Peter stayed there on the floor until her was sure I was gone. I'm
sure at that point he knew that he was unready for the information that he
so desperately wanted to know earlier. He had gotten a taste of how fucked
up I was and was not so ready to dive into that just yet. Pete would know
in time the fullness of the tangled web that had been woven over the past
week. But before that, the web would grow much larger and complex.