Date: Sat, 19 Apr 2003 10:44:45 -0400 From: Tom Cup <tom_cup@hotmail.com> Subject: David's Fortunes Copyright 2000-2003 by the Paratwa Partnership: A Colorado Corporation. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means electronic or mechanical, except in the case of reviews, without written permission from the Paratwa Partnership, Inc, 354 Plateau Drive, Florissant, CO 80816 This is a fictional story involving alternative sexual relationships. If this type of material offends you, please do not read any further. This material is intended for mature adult audiences. Names, characters, locations and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. ************************************************************************ Author's Note: These chapter's were written some time ago and are based on "David's Christmas Present" which can be found here on Nifty. The orginal author was unable to finish the story and asked for others to do so. For reasons, that I won't go into here, these chapters have been only available to the members of TomCup.com. We are releasing them now for the enjoyment of Nifty readers. Because the story takes off from where the original ended, the reader may wish to read the original chapters before proceeding here. If you are familiar with the original story, we hope that you will enjoy the alternative ending in the following chapters. ************************************************************************ David's Fortunes By Tom Cup Chapter 1 Walls Adam hadn't known what else to do. Arnie assured the boy that he had done the right thing, though David appeared even more agitated when Arnie and Val arrived. Adam watched David leave the table, down two stiff drinks and moodily retire to his room. Adam cleaned up dinner, got the twins washed and in bed, and then went to visit David, who was still nursing his third drink -- somehow the liquid now seemed sour to him. He wasn't going to get plowed after all. "You OK?" Adam asked. David smiled. Adam's concerned was beautiful. A dark angel stood before his eyes, Sun kissed of skin, raven hair and eyes of deep pools of liquid brown. Neither David nor Adam moved. They stood and stared at one another. David was ashamed of his behavior. He looked at the glass in his hand and held it out to Adam. "Get rid of this for me, will ya?" Adam took the glass from him and stepped back. A chilled ran down David's spine. Adam had hesitated. It wasn't very noticeable. But David noticed. They had always been so free with one another: never a hesitation. Adam had hesitated. My parents are coming and I am making Adam feel the way I felt when I was a kid. David took a deep breath. "I'm sorry if I frightened you," David said. "A little. I've never seen you like this." That was something. Adam was still able to tell David the truth. David had never been able to tell his Dad the truth. That relationship lived on layers of lies and half-truths. Truth, and the freedom to be who you really are, was the foundations of David's relationship with Adam. David didn't want Adam to ever feel afraid. He wanted Adam to be as free with him as he had always been. Being a Dad meant protecting Adam from some of the ugliness of the world. But being Adam's lover meant something else. Adam wasn't just his son; he was his lover. David had to remember that. He had to reconcile that fact in his mind. How can I be both father and lover? David knew he would have to open himself further to Adam -- tell him the truth. "My parents.... I am really bothered by the fact that Dennings has contacted my parents." "Why?" "They hate me, Adam, they really hate me." Adam looked at David. David wasn't sure what Adam saw but the look on Adam's face was a sad mixture of understanding and compassion. It made David want to cry. He did cry. Walls are some times built to hold in, or hold out, the flood of emotions that we wish never to see, David thought, what happens when those walls break? David realized why he wanted to help the boys so much. He wanted to give them what he never had. He understood clearly that he could abstain with Adam and still love him, protect him, and provide for him. That was important for him to know. He understood why it was important to let Adam be whatever he wanted to be: he was never allowed to be himself when he was young. "When I was your age," David said, "All I wanted was for my father to say he loved me. He would never say it. Never! I remember sitting in the car with him one day...I can't even remember where we were going... and I told him. I said, `Dad I love you.' He got this weird look on his face. I wasn't sure he heard me so I said, `I love you Dad.'" "What'd he say? He had to say something!" David laughed. "Yeah, he said, `what are you some kind of faggot? Men don't talk to men like that!' I was crushed. I never said it again. Never!" "You say it to me all the time." "Yeah. I do." David had wanted so much more from his childhood. He remembered how it felt to watch the other kids playing, or just hanging out, with their dads. His dad just never seemed to have the time. David knew if his parents had shown just a wit of interest in anything he did, he would have soared to please them. But they never did. David would be at every one of his kids' events, he vowed never to miss one. He wanted his kids to have walls that strengthen them and not walls that were a burden to maintain. That was how he saw parenting. His parents...his parents pretended. They never were truly parents to him. They never cared. David wanted them to care, so David pretended that they cared. He continued to hope that one day they would look him up. Surely they had heard of PowerNet. They could not have overlooked the name of the young millionaire entrepreneur. Surely his father could overlook his suspicions and prejudices, for his son's sake, and be proud. But they didn't call or write, and David convinced himself that they wouldn't -- while secretly hoping that they would. And now they were coming, to see David? No. But at the request of: Mr. Dennings. David found it incredulous. The walls were breaking. He thought of Gwen and laughed. He thought of his mother and became silently pensive. He thought of his father and railed. He thought of Gary Bulman and cried. His mood changed so rapidly that Adam grew afraid. He wasn't afraid that David would hurt him, he was afraid that something was wrong with his Dad. He didn't know whether, or not, David was having a heart attack -- one could say that he was -- but Adam was concerned. So he called Arnie and Val. "I'm OK Arnie," David said, "I swear, I'm OK." "Like hell you are. I know you David. This is eating the hell out of you." "I can handle it." "Look, if you tell me to get the hell out of here, I will. But I know what you are going through. I've watched through the years as you heard nothing at birthdays, and holidays. Yeah, you did a great job of pretending that you didn't care. You pretended you didn't notice. You did good. But I keep wondering when you will get it through that thick skull of yours that I care, Val cares, the kids care. When are you going to let us in?" "Damn it Arnie! Don't you understand that now is not the time for me to lose it, to fall to pieces?" "David, if you hadn't already fallen to pieces Adam wouldn't have called us." It was true. David's eyes ached from the dryness left from expending his tears. His throat was a mixture of sand and wind that scratched each syllable he made. He was emotionally, physically and spiritually drained. His mind continued to shift from the conversation to maintaining the walls; plugging the holes as they appeared, keeping the flood of emotions and fears at bay. "Maybe I can take the kids back to the house," Val offered to Arnie, "And you can stay with David." "No!" screamed Adam, "I'm sorry Uncle Arnie, Aunt Val, but I want to stay with my Dad. Please Dad...please... I want to stay with you. Please..." David allowed a few tears to fall. Of course, he nodded; Adam could stay. He would be all right if Adam stayed. Even after seeing me at my worst, my son still loves me, wants to be with me. "I'll be OK," David said to Arnie. Arnie nodded. Val didn't have to rouse the twins. They were already awake. Their eyes enlarged with concern for David, they hugged him and told him that it was OK; whatever happened it was OK because they knew that he loved them. No one had ever care so much about them that they could feel it. They knew David loved them, they felt it in the depths of their souls. David, they knew, would do all he could for them. He wanted to provide for them to the point of driving himself mad. But the twins didn't want him to go mad. They loved him as he was. "We love you Dad," Eric said, "It's going to be all right. No matter what, it's going to be all right." Jody nodded to each word. "OK, let's get you guys to the house and to bed," Val said. One last hug from each twin, and one from Arnie and Val, and they were gone. David and Adam were alone with the house to themselves. David wasn't in the mood to talk or do much of anything else. He sat staring at Adam for over fifteen minutes before Adam got up and went to the CD collection. It was simply something to do. He just couldn't bear to sit in the silence any longer. Adam picked a CD at random, inserted it and pushed play. They both recognized the song as it began. There been times in my life I've spent wondering why Still somehow I believed we'd always survive Adam thought to pick another CD but David told him to wait. David strained to remember the singer's name. Kenny Loggins: he hadn't listened to him in....well, he couldn't remember how long. Now I'm not so sure You're waiting to hear One good reason to try Lord, what more can I say? What's left to provide? David began to cry. He loved the trumpet voice of Kenny Loggins and the minor seventh chords he used. It was why he bought the CD. The words hadn't really captured him at first, but now Kenny was talking to him, singing just to him, telling the story of David's life -- revealing, in the way that bards do, the heart and soul of the moment. You think that maybe it's over, only if you want it to be. Are you gonna wait for a sign, your miracle, Or standup and fight? This is it! Make no mistake where you are. This is it! Your back's to the corner This is it! Don't be a fool any more This is it! The waiting is over Adam realized the power of the words. The song had a groove and thump that he liked, but it was the words that move him. He looked into David's eyes. The power of the song overwhelmed them both. They were at a moment in their lives together that some decisions had to be made. They had to decide whether to give up or go on. Dennings was stacking the deck against them, bringing David's parents in to say...to say...what? No room to run; no way to hide No time for wondering why It's here. The moment is now About to decide. God! How did he know to write those words? That was where David was. He wanted to run, to hide, but there was no place he could go. He wanted time to think and ponder what was happening but things were happening far too fast. His parents would be arriving in the morning. He had no time to think. The moment was now! The song continued and David heard the words anew. You said that maybe it's over Not if you don't want it to be. For once in your life, Here's your miracle Stand up and fight! This is it! Make no mistake where you are. This is it! You're going no further This is it! Until its over and done. David was crying. It was as if the song was written just for him, for this moment, situation and time. He had thought that it was over. He had thought that his parents coming meant that Dennings had won. Wasn't that why he was so moody? Wasn't that why he began the ritual of drinking himself under the table? But as he listened he gained strength. He understood that his miracle wouldn't come from giving up but from fighting. He had a lot to fight for, a beautiful fourteen-year-old son and two twins that wanted him to be their Dad also. David had a lot to fight for and David was a fighter. No one can tell you, for you know Who makes the choice of how it goes It's not up to me this time, you know, Comes a day in ev'ry life This is it! Make no mistake where you are This is it! You're going no further This is it! Until it's over and done This is it! One way or another. David and Adam listened. They understood the magic of the music. David dried his eyes and smiled. This is it! he thought, I'll get this done! One way or another! Adam moved into David's arms. They both were comforted and inspired by the song. They both felt that they were meant to hear this song at this time in their lives. This is it! David thought. I make my stand here and now. I won't back down. If I want these kids I have to take on all comers. He squeezed Adam tightly in his arms. They looked into each other's eyes, and David saw Adam's love for him. "I love you Dad." "I get that," David said with a smile, "I finally get it." "What do you mean? Didn't you know how much I loved you before?" "Well, yes and no. I knew we loved each other but I was afraid of losing you. I mean...you are still pretty young and..." "Yeah... I know what you are going to say; I could change my mind about you and all. Dad, when I was in Cherokee, I learned something and every since John and I.... Well you know... fooled around, I've been thinking about it." "Yeah?" "Well... you're a Cherokee warrior now...." David laughed. I wouldn't call myself a warrior!" "Please Dad...." "OK, I'm sorry. "Well, as a member of the tribe we can do things there that we can't do here." "I don't see the point." "Grandfather told me a story about a warrior that fell in love with an orphaned boy. At first I was embarrassed because I didn't want to tell him about you and me but then, I realized that he already knew, and was telling me the story because he loved me and trusted you. In the story, a brave falls in love with a young white boy. You know what happens? The boy is brought before the elders of the tribe and asked some questions. Then, late one night, the medicine man comes. He goes to the boy's tent and takes the boy to the brave's tent. Then the medicine man blesses them. The boy becomes the brave's squaw.... his squaw-boy. And you know what? The tribe accepts the boy and the brave, just like they were married!" David stared at Adam. Adam stared back, waiting for David to get what he was saying. Finally David sighed and said, "It's a great story but that would never work." "Why?" Adam asked. "There are different laws on the reservation than here." "So let's live on the reservation. We are all Cherokee now. Why can't we live as Cherokee? I could be your squaw-boy, everyone would accept it if the elders and medicine man said; and the twins would be our.... well....I guess, they would be our kids. I know it sounds stupid but..." The biggest problem that David saw with Adam's idea was that it wasn't stupid. There were a multitude of unknowns but it wasn't stupid. David wanted what Adam was saying to be true! Why not just pick up the twins and drive off into the sunset with them and Adam? Why not go for the happily ever after ending to the story? David sighed. He knew why. He just wasn't the runaway and hided type. When he left home that was what he was doing, leaving; not running away. He left his parents behind. He never ran away from them. He wasn't going to start running now. If they ever lived in Cherokee, it would be because they truly wanted to live there not because they were forced, or were in hiding. No, it was a lovely idea. David would love nothing more than to be free to have Adam as his own, but he wouldn't do it like this. And besides there was... "John," David whispered." "I knew you were going to say that. Dad, I love John. I really, really do. But it's not the same as you. He's my brother, my little brother, and I wanted to share with him everything that I could. But when I think about the rest of my life...." "Adam, you're fourteen," David interrupted, "you can't even imagine the rest of your life." "Yeah, you're right.... Only it's, I can't imagine the rest of my life without you! I love you so much it hurts. That's why I got scared tonight. I thought I was going to lose you. I can't! Not now! Not ever! I love you so much." David was lost in a wave of emotion as he watched Adam break into tears. He gathered Adam into his arms, holding and rocking the boy. He smothered him in kisses and promised that it would be all right; they all would be all right. Adam was not going to lose his father, his lover. No, David remembered what he was fighting for, how important and precious the boy in his arms had become to him. Adam was his world. Slowly the sobs stopped and Adam looked into David's eyes. David wiped the tears from Adams cheeks and kissed him gently. There was a warm glow of love that haloed them. They kissed passionately. The stress of the evening, and intense conversation, melted into their loins. Each knew the other wielded an aching hard-on. But they were in no rush. They kissed slowly and gently, whispering `I love you' to one another. They bathed in each other's affection like two new lovers. They became drunk in their love for one another. They had almost forgotten that the CD player was on, when Kenny Loggins again began to sing: Are those your eyes? Is that your smile? I've been looking at you forever, yet I never saw you before. Are these your hands Holding mine? Now I wonder how I could've been so blind. And for the first time, I am looking in your eyes. For the first time, I'm seeing who you are. I can't believe how much I see When you're looking back at me Now I understand what love is- Love is, for the first time. David and Adam stared at each other. Yes, that was what they were feeling. After all that they had been through, after all that had happened in their individual lives, after falling in love with each other, as they lay together kissing and stroking, staring into one another's eyes, it was like the first time. They were alive with love; they burned for love. And each knew that the flame that burned in the other's heart would not die. "I do want to be your brave," David whispered, "I want us to be together forever." "I love you," Adam said, "I really love you." Kenny sang: Can this be real? Can this be true? Am I the person I was this morning, And are you the same you? It's all so strange How can it be? All along this love Was right in front of me. And for the first time, I am looking in your eyes. For the first time, I'm seeing who you are. I can't believe how much I see When you're looking back at me Now I understand what love is- Love is, for the first time. They made love slowly, yet passionately. All the stress and worry disappeared as Adam comforted his brave and as David made love to his squaw. Their lovemaking was giddy and playful. They relaxed in each other's body with long sighs and tender moans. ***** David woke just before seven. Adam was sleeping peacefully next to him. What did I do in my last life to deserve this? The voice in David's head wondered. You must have been a saint or something cause you have an angel sleeping in your bed. David smiled. He kissed Adam on the forehead and gently, quietly, got out of bed. "Where you going?" Adam asked sleepily. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you. I'm just going to hit the shower." David thought that Adam had rolled over and gone back to sleep. He layered his hair in the hot shower water and breathed in deeply. Then he felt those soft hands washing his back. Adam was in the shower with him. They soaped each other, kissing and fondling as they went along. They washed every part of each other. And made love enveloped by water and steam. David called Arnie to let him know he was indeed OK. Arnie was of course relieved. The twins were up early and wanted to talk to David. After assuring them that he was OK, David told them that he loved them and asked to speak to Arnie again. "What's up?" Arnie asked. "I think I'm going to take some time off. Spend it with the kids." "Sounds like a plan to me." "Arnie..." "Come on David. Don't go all mushy on me... but yeah, man, I love you too." Arnie agreed to bring the twins back to the house. Adam fried up some bacon and eggs. He and David sat down and began to eat. The doorbell rang. David looked at his watch. 9:00. He couldn't believe that Dennings wouldn't have the decency to call before bringing his parents by. Then he laughed. Of course he would. That was exactly what Dennings would do. He calmly told Adam to hit speed dial seven on the phone in the den, and to tell Ben that he was needed right away at the house. Adam rushed to the den as David went to open the door for the visitors. David opened the door without checking to see who was waiting on the landing. Dennings was there, of course. And so were his parents. He was prepared for them. The love that he and Adam shared the night before, and earlier in the morning, had strengthened his walls into a might fortress. He would need that strength. Gwen was there also.