Date: Sat, 4 Oct 2008 19:00:24 -0400
From: chris james <drmeta4@gmail.com>
Subject: Gene, Chapters 7 & 8

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				Gene  (M/B)

Chapter 7

      The alarm buzzed Ben awake at six o'clock. He usually had a morning
run and then a shower while the coffee brewed. But that was the normal
routine, nothing like that was possible this morning. He had to get Gene
up, feed him and drive him to school. Ben smiled; the responsibility felt
wonderful.

      He rolled over and threw back the covers, combing fingers through his
hair to ease the tangles. The boy had wanted a morning shower which at
least would wake him up. He stumbled into the bathroom, took a piss and
threw some water on his face. He looked in the mirror and chuckled. Yeah,
OK; at least he wouldn't scare the boy.

      He walked across the hall and into the boy's bedroom. Gene was still
fast asleep, and in the night he had thrown the covers off. Ben was
presented with the view of a nearly erect cock lying across Gene's stomach;
the head of it covering his belly button. My God, it was big enough to kill
someone.

      He could have stood there for hours admiring that body, but he had to
get Gene up...well out of bed at least, he was already up. Ben pulled the
sheet until it covered the appendage and kissed the boy's cheek. Gene
started awake and then realized where he was. It got Ben that winning
smile.

      "Morning cutie," Ben said.

      "Cutie?

      "Better than dude...you are a handsome young man...a cutie."

      Gene rubbed his face. "No way, nothing handsome about me."

      Ben frowned and sat on the edge of the bed, the boy scooted over to
give him some room.

      "Gene, do you know what the word 'ego' means?" Ben asked.

      "Ego? No...what?"

      "Ego is the force that motivates self image, your opinion of
yourself. If you have a low opinion about yourself it's generally because
most people seem to regard themselves in light of their surroundings. Like
if you stand in shit you might consider yourself shitty, get me?"

      He grinned, "Shitty...well sorta."

      "A handsome guy might think he is way too handsome just to hang out
with ordinary people, and that's too much ego. But if Gene says, 'nothing
handsome about me' like he is standing in shit, I'd say you have low self
esteem, a small ego. But that is about to change, young man. I promise
you'll change and I always keep my promises...especially to you."

      "You think I'm handsome? But I don't see that."

      "You will, there's a lot about you that people like."

      Ben looked at the large bulge in the sheets and let out a laugh. Gene
saw the look and immediately blushed.

      "Oh damn...sorry."

      "You're bigger than most boys your age, which should make you
happy...in fact, it should give you a little more ego," Ben said.

      Gene laughed at that. "All it ever does is embarrass me. Don't you
get erections?"

      It was Ben's turn to laugh. "Hell yeah, but not like a guy your age
does, thank goodness."

      "Is yours this big?"

      Ben pulled open the waistband of his boxers and looked
down. "Nope....hey where did it go?"

      "You're crazy, I bet you got a big one," Gene said.

      "Well you might see it some day, but I won't go around showing it
off. It might be OK for you to run around naked but if someone sees me
doing it too...then I would think we have a problem for some folks. I don't
want anyone to compare me to your brother's coach."

      "You're not at all like him, Ben," he said. "Hey you're a handsome
guy, did you know that?"

      "Oh Lord, he thinks I'm handsome...tell me more...more, stroke my
ego."

      "Is that anything like masturbating?"

      "A little, I guess. Masturbation is self-love, the perfect way to
stroke your ego."

      Gene blushed and lifted the sheet, looking under it at himself.

      "Guess I better go shower...and love myself to make this thing go
away."

      Ben rolled on the bed with laughter as Gene slipped out and headed
for the bathroom. The boy didn't even try to hide his erection, but Ben
watched his cute little ass instead. Damn but the boy fed his ego so
well. It made him happy to know that Gene felt so comfortable like
this. But the best was yet to come, Ben was about to give the boy's ego a
major boost. Well, his American Express card was.

      Ben fed him cold cereal for breakfast because that was what he
wanted, but he insisted Gene eat a banana with it. They would have to get
some lunch food so that his caloric intake at school could be
controlled. Gene was on the voucher program but then he thought the
cafeteria food was crap, Ben could only agree. His diet had to be planned
for him to stay in shape, no reason the boy should not do the same.

      They took the Vette and Ben dropped Gene off in the parking lot at
school, not in front but around the side where there were fewer
students. In time there would be a lot of questions asked about the nature
of their relationship, but Ben didn't want to get there any time soon.

      Gene waved his goodbye and Ben rolled away leaving the boy to face
another day, and Hanover was sure to be in there somewhere. Gene looked OK
in his worn jeans and faded T-shirt, not what Ben wanted to see but it
would do. They couldn't make a radical image change overnight, that would
attract attention. But there were better pants, nicer shirts and good
sneakers waiting for them this afternoon at the mall.

      Ben knew the boy would defer to him when they shopped, but he wanted
Gene to be happy with the choices. The one thing he needed to have was a
suit for the times when Ben whisked him off to an expensive restaurant for
dinner. And then there was Christmas to consider.

      Ben had already planned his annual Florida trek to visit the folks
before Gene arrived. Was that off the table now? His parents didn't know he
was gay, something he had never been comfortable discussing with them. But
if he showed up on their doorstep with a seventeen year old boy in
tow...well, life might get a little complicated after that. At the same
time it was important for them to know about Gene's new living
arrangement. It was time to plan a strategy.

      Fortunately Flo had other plans for his day. It seems there had been
an arrest at one of the downtown clubs the previous weekend and there were
two juvenile casualties sitting in the waiting room.

      One look told Ben these kids were already heading down the wrong road
in life, their gang colors were harsh to his eyes and embarrassing to the
parents sitting there beside them. Ben introduced himself as Flo handed
over their initial paperwork from the court. The boys were both fourteen,
no facial hair but what looked to be dreads stuffed up under their knit
hats. The way they were 'stylin' didn't affect him, but Ben checked them
out to make sure they weren't armed.

      As usual he took the parents in his office first, figuring it was
better to hear the rational side of the incident before the boys tried to
push a load of crap on him. The Leonard and Jackson family, with both sets
of parents looking more than a little upset.

      "It's all wrong," Mrs. Jackson began right off the bat. "My Leon
wouldn't do any of those things they charged him with, he's a good boy."

      "I think the police just needed someone to blame," Mr. Leonard said.

      "Just a moment, if you please," Ben said.

      It took him all of five minutes to peruse the court documents and
arrest file. The police report was frank and right to the point. Leon
Jackson had broken into a car outside the nightclub at one o'clock in the
morning. The other boy, Maurice Leonard was arrested with a hammer in his
pocket; shards of glass from the car's window were imbedded in the handle.

      Both were dressed in gang colors and a car was seen speeding away
from the scene of the arrest. Officers had responded to a cell phone call
from a woman who witnessed the break-in. A woman was later arrested and
charged with solicitation and performing lewd acts in her parked car. If
she was the one who saw the boys break the car's window it was not much of
a witness, but still...

      "OK, so I have a bit of the picture...at least from the police's
standpoint. Can any of you explain why the boys were out at that time of
night?"

      "Leon was supposed to be spending the night over at the Leonard
residence with Maurice," Mr. Jackson said.

      "And we were told the boys would be together at the Jackson's,"
Mrs. Leonard said.

      "They outsmarted us, I guess." That was Mr. Leonard speaking.

      "What do you know about their gang affiliations?" Ben asked.

      "I don't believe either of them is really in a gang," Mr. Jackson
said. "I know the kids all wear these supposed gang colors, but that's just
nonsense, Leon is afraid of the gangs."

      "Well it looks like there was some form of initiation going on here
from what I read. Possibly the boys were set up to take a fall. Sometimes
these gang leaders assign new initiates a crime to perform and then rat
them out to see how they'd react. There was a car seen leaving the scene,
so they were probably being watched as they performed the crime."

      "You're serious?" Mrs. Leonard this time.

      "Absolutely. Look, I'm not saying your boys want to be gang members,
but the peer pressure is tremendous. Now they have a criminal record, it
could have been much worse."

      "I don't see what could be worse, my son has never been in trouble
before," Mrs. Jackson said.

      "The same goes for Maurice." Mrs. Leonard looked like she was about
to cry.

      "The only benefit to you is that now we know they are under pressure
by some criminal element. The court will in all likelihood place them both
on probation, and that means they will be watched. All of you are going to
have to be more vigilant in the future. You should go talk to their school
counselors and keep them apprised of the situation. School is the one place
where they are out of your sight for most of the day. If there is pressure
on them to perform in a gang activity it will come from there first.

      "You are going to have to keep a strict eye on them and control their
activities. If they aren't already involved in some sports program I would
get them into something pretty quickly. Much of this gang banger mentality
is fostered by idle kids. Team sports doesn't allow them time to associate
with the wrong element."

      "Leon wanted to play basketball this year but he is so clumsy I was
afraid he would get hurt," Mrs. Jackson said.

      "Kids thrive on the contest, the thrill of winning. Sure he may get
knocked around a bit, but it will teach him to get back up and face the
challenge. They are fourteen year old boys, they're supposed to be awkward
and clumsy as their bodies develop, but they'll grow out of it.

      "I'll talk to them in a bit and see if I can get them to open up
about the car break in and what that was really all about. They tricked you
folks because you are good parents and they knew you wouldn't allow them to
go wandering around town that late for no good reason. But your parenting
skills are being challenged and you'll have to take it up a notch if you
want to remain in control. That's my advice for the moment, let me talk to
them now and see what they think happened.

      "I will send my report into the prosecutor's office next week and
outline what we just discussed. You may have a copy if you wish, just leave
your address with my secretary at the desk, OK? I want you to know that
this isn't the end of the world for your boys, it's just the beginning. You
take a firm stand now and the gangs won't stand a chance against you."

      A chorus of 'thank you' followed Ben's little speech and he went out
with them to fetch the boys back in for a chat. It was time to scare the
shit out of them. Don't know why but it always seemed to work when he did
it. Maybe it was because Ben was 'the man.'

      Leon slouched and Maurice fidgeted. They pretended to look at
everything in the room except the man behind the desk. He soon put a stop
to that.

      "Hey Leon, you ever been fucked?" Ben asked.

      "What...?"

      "You ever grab your ankles and let some big ass mother fucker slide
his cock up your ass?" Ben asked with a grin.

      Maurice lost it, he started laughing.

      "Probably not, Maurice is a more likely target for some jailhouse
rapist," Ben continued. Both boys were sitting up straight; he was the only
thing they were looking at now.

      "You probably don't have a dime's worth of sexual experience between
you. So I don't imagine you think too much about what happens to young kids
who get jail time. Oh maybe you heard something or another but you don't
believe it. Well believe it, it happens.

      "Maybe not this time, this time you guys are going to get probation
and like it. But you go on doing stupid shit like this and next year, or
four years from now when you're eighteen, they will send you up state to
the big boy's prison where rape is as common as brushing your teeth."

      "You're just trying to scare us," Leon said.

      "No, you guys scare me," Ben said. "You have nice loving parents who
sat in here and told me that their sons would never commit such a terrible
crime. They don't believe you were doing it to get into a gang, they just
can't believe that. But I know better, their sons think they will own the
world if they join a gang.

      "You know any gang members been to prison? Ask them what happens to
sweet young things in there. Now you might survive the rapes but when you
become someone's bitch and get AIDS there won't be any turning back."

      Maurice was shaking with fear; Leon was the one Ben needed to finish
off.

      "So Leon, you don't believe me? Want me to show you some pictures of
what a guy's butt hole looks like after he's been gang raped?"

      Leon looked uncertain now and Maurice was about to cry.

      "But don't worry, it won't happen to you...do you know why? It won't
because your parents love you and they are going to rule your life, not the
gangs. You fooled them once, but I doubt you'll be able to do it again, and
that's a good thing.

      "You have some serious apologizing to do, to your parents, to the
court, to the poor guy whose car you trashed. Your probation officer is
going to be looking over your shoulder for a few years, and you better not
piss him off...you won't look good in prison stripes.

      "Now go on home. I'll see you guys in court. I would kiss a little
ass for a while, do what your parents ask of you and enjoy the freedom you
have every day. Get busy, life is hard enough without you goin out there
and fuckin up like this, OK?"

      They were both nodding now. Silly kids couldn't wait to get away from
him and back to their parents. Mission accomplished.

      Ben spent the afternoon at the courthouse doing paperwork and then
called Tom Braden his attorney. The brass plaque outside Tom's offices
still read Bradshaw, Braden and Malcolm. Ben's father and Tom had partnered
thirty years ago, and although Malcolm Senior was now a judge, his son was
in the firm with Tom.

      "Hey ya, Ben, what's going on in your life?" Tom said when he picked
up the phone.

      "Little of this and that, business is booming...don't let anyone tell
you crime doesn't pay," Ben laughed. "But I have some legal work for
you...interested?"

      "Damn," Tom said, "And I was just getting used to these afternoon
naps. What do you need?"

      "I suppose basically I need custody papers and a power of attorney
for a minor child. I've taken in a seventeen year old boy and need to cover
myself, and him for that matter."

      "Seventeen did you say, no parents?" Tom asked.

      "Father is in prison, mother is only about one step behind him. She's
a drug addict, but that's the least of her problems. He was a client but
that's been resolved, now he's just a needy child and I took up the cause."

      Silence followed that statement, and that was a good thing. Tom never
rushed into anything, he always studied the angles and Ben respected
that. But Tom also knew what his father didn't and as his client Ben's
confidentiality was assured.

      "Is he gay, Ben? You know I have to ask...does he know about you?"

      "No, I haven't told him, but I probably will. It isn't a part of why
I'm doing this and I'm not involved with him...sexually. I need to be able
to control his environment, keep him healthy and push him through high
school. He was teetering on the brink of failure and I found that
unacceptable."

      "If his mother will sign a consent statement, his age isn't a
factor," Tom said. "He can choose to live with you. Medical POA is one
thing you'll need from her and if you want to pursue it a bit farther then
guardianship is the next step."

      "You have questions...I can hear it in your voice," Ben said.

      "Sure I do, but I'm not sure you fully understand why youre doing
this, am I right?"

      "It's something like that, I'm going with emotions for now, he needs
me and I need to take care of him."

      "You still have that bottle of Napoleon brandy I gave you for
graduation?"

      "Sure do...interested in tasting it?" Ben asked.

      "You bet, thought you'd never ask. I would like to meet this young
man; he must be exceptional to have put you in this position. Say seven
o'clock?"

      "We'll be there, Tom. Look forward to seeing you."

      "Me too, Ben."

      He hung up the phone and sighed. Tom was a hard nosed lawyer; he
always told it like it was. If he didn't think this would be a problem then
he would bend over backwards to help Ben through the legal
quagmire. Lending Tom's credibility to the situation might help him out
with the parents as well. He would make sure they bought Gene a nice
bathing suit; he would need it in Florida.

      Ben pulled up stakes at two-thirty to go pick up the kid from
school. They would be at the mall by four and home by six-thirty in time to
meet Tom. Ben chuckled, the old rascal had figured out a way to get into
that bottle after all, he had been trying for years.

      He hit the side parking lot at three-fifteen and waited for school to
let out. Ben seemed to be the only male personage waiting for a kid, but
there were lots of soccer moms in their mini-vans.

      The 'does he know about you' question still rang in his ears. Tom was
right; Gene needed to know before this got much further. The Hanover issue
aside, Ben thought Gene would accept the knowledge and work with it. He had
never made any advances towards the boy so he shouldn't be considered a
threat. It might shrink Gene's comfort zone a bit; after all he had seen
nothing wrong with showing off his body last night and this morning. But it
would make him sad if the boy felt uncomfortable.

      Ben heard the bell ring and the school seemed to shudder and shake as
the kids blasted out of the building. Kids were running everywhere, diving
into cars and exiting the property in what appeared to be well
choreographed chaos.

      He saw Gene coming across the lot...but not alone. The other boy was
familiar; as he should be...it was Dean. It was only fair, Gene had to be
happy with his new situation and Dean was the one person who could
understand what it meant. The boys walked up to the car, both smiling and
it made Ben's heart skip a beat. God they were beautiful.

      "Ben...this is my brother Dean."

      "Hello, Dean...nice to finally meet you."

      "Same here," Dean said. Ben could see a million questions behind
those eyes.

      "I suppose Gene told you a bit about me. In all fairness, would you
like to come and have dinner with us? This weekend if you like," he said.

      Dean looked at his brother and nodded. "Yeah, I'd like that. Are we
celebrating something?"

      Ben laughed. "How about 'Free at last, Thank God Almighty, free at
last.'"

      Both boys cracked up, although Ben did not do Dr. Martin Luther King
any justice by stealing his quote, but they got the point. Both had now
escaped the clutches of the wicked witch in the trailer park.

      Dean looked at his brother. "You're right, he is a little crazy...but
I like that. Sweet car, Ben...bet it turns a lot of heads."

      The boys hugged one another goodbye and Ben suddenly had an
insight. It was Dean that gave his brother the feeling of openness about
being affectionate, good for him. No matter that Gene had called his
brother a fag during his rant yesterday; he had learned something positive
from the boy.

      There was no doubt in Ben's mind that Dean was comfortable as a gay
person, his body language confirmed that. His comment about the car wasn't
all that innocent either, and the way he smiled after saying it was...was
thrilling. It was a good thing that Gene wasn't aware of his brother's
flirting ways. Ben would have to remain neutral and not fan the flame.

      Gene slid into the car and Dean gave them both a little wave as he
strode away towards the building. His body was more muscular than Gene's,
his movements more self assured, nothing wrong with his ego. Ben could not
comment on his relationship with the coach, having never met the man, but
he did feel a twinge of envy right about then.

      "How was your day?" Gene asked.

      "Hmm...pretty boring until now. Your brother seems very nice...he
cares about you."

      "Yeah," Gene said and then he was quiet for a minute as Ben started
the car and drove to the exit.

      "I'm sorry, Ben. I said some pretty bad things about him yesterday
and I don't know why. He's always been my best friend and I guess I was
just mad cause he left so suddenly."

      "But now you understand why he left, you've shared the same
experience. I think he would understand how you felt." Ben said.

      "He does, we talked about it today. He wanted to know all about you
and he asked a million questions about where we lived and what you
do. Asking him for dinner, that was sweet. Do you think he'll bring Brad?"
Gene asked.

      "Is that the coach's name? Uh, I doubt it. I don't think Brad wants
their relationship to go public, even if it is only us."

      "But you don't worry what people know about us...do you?"

      "It's not quite the same thing now is it? We're not in that kind of
relationship." Ok, Ben thought, where is he taking this conversation? Is my
little boy on a fishing expedition?

      "So you don't mind if I talk about you at school?" Gene asked.

      "I'll prepare a written statement that you can hand out to the whole
school. Maybe the principal will let you announce it over the public
address system in the morning."

      "You're funny...but that's not what I mean. It's just...well, I'm
proud of you, Ben. I wanna talk about you and all the great things you've
done for me. I don't know how to say it properly, but you're the best, and
I want everyone to know that."

      Ben's hand was resting on the gear shift knob and Gene gently placed
his hand over it. With a quick glance, Ben could see the joy written all
over the boy's face. Gene didn't completely understand what he wanted to
feel in this situation, he just needed some way to express himself.

      "I enjoyed meeting your brother today, he seems happy," Ben said.

      "Yeah...he says he and Brad are in love," Gene replied. "Can two guys
be in love?"

      "Any two people can share love," Ben replied. "They just have to show
one another what it means. Why don't you ask Dean how he feels?"

      "Oh...oh...I couldn't do that. Why would he tell me?" Gene asked.

      "Because he loves you, and I think he's proud of the love he shares
with that man."

      "But the things they do...I couldn't ask."

      "I wouldn't want you to ask Dean about that. Don't ever equate sex
with love, Gene. Love may inspire them to have sex, but sex is not a reason
to love someone. Love is about sharing life. And I want to share mine with
you."

      Gene was silent for a while, digesting the conversation. Ben didn't
want to pursue the issue. It was enough that they had voiced the
feelings. It made coming out to the boy more difficult. Now Gene will
wonder if I want sex with him, Ben thought. And I would have to be frank,
would I sleep with him? The answer was yes, but the caveat was that he
would have to be willing...and hopefully eighteen.

      Fortunately they were approaching the mall and any further
conversation was put on hold when Ben started discussing what they should
buy.

      "School clothes I think come first, then something a little nicer for
when we go out." Ben said.

      "Where would we go?" Gene asked.

      "To dinner, maybe a movie or a concert."

      Gene giggled, "That sounds like a date."

      "Oh My God, I knew there was a reason I couldn't take you
anywhere...people might think we were on a date."

      Gene broke up laughing and punched Ben in the arm.

      "Hey, not while I'm driving. I will kick your scrawny ass later when
we get home," Ben said.

      "Oh, you're gonna try, huh?"

      "Only if you want...now there's the Dillard's, I suggest we start
there," Ben said.

      Five pairs of jeans, two pairs of slacks, four t-shirts, three polo
shirts, two long sleeve plaids, six pairs of boxers, twelve pairs of socks,
one bathing suit and two pairs of tennis shoes later they left Dillard's.

      And on to the Sports Emporium for running shorts, shoes and an
athletic supporter. The latter seemed most necessary; Gene needed to
protect those most important assets, they might be useful at some point in
the future.

      Ben decided they would leave the suit for another trip, and he wanted
to take Gene to Dick's for a really nice winter jacket. It was six-thirty
when they hit the road for home.

      "We have to be back before seven," Ben said. "We have company coming
over."

      "Really...who?"

      "Tom Braden, he's an old friend of the family...and he wants to meet
you."

      "He does?"

      "Yup, he's gonna be a very good person for you to know, he's my
lawyer."

      "Umm...does he know about me living with you?" Gene asked.

      "Of course he does, he's going to make the papers for your mother to
sign."

      Gene thought a moment. "I suppose you must feel like you're my parent
or something." Silence, the noise from the road occupied their world for a
while.

      "I don't think of you as a parent," Gene finally said. "But it's more
than just a friend."

      "What we have is very special; maybe even unique, huh?"

      "Yeah, probably...but it feels the best."

      They got home before Tom arrived, and carried all the clothing bags
into the house. It had been fun watching the boy try on different clothes;
he was as slender as any model Ben had ever seen. His joy at the new duds
was apparent at the store, but now he seemed a little more reserved.

      Ben helped him carry them up to his room and they started putting
things away. There was quite a pile of bags and wrapping material to take
out to the garbage. Ben started to gather it up.

      "Ben..."

      He turned and Gene gave him a hug. Ben stroked his hair and kissed
his forehead in return.

      "Thank you, Ben. You're so good to me...I love all this...how can I
ever pay you back?"

      "There is no payback for you, just be my special young man, that's
all I want."

      Gene slid his arms up and grasped Ben's head. The boy pulled their
faces together and they kissed, this time on the lips. Not a long kiss, but
a tender, thoughtful kiss. Ben had to acknowledge what he had done; it had
to be right between them.

      "Thank you...that was sweet."

      "Uh...I never kissed a man before," Gene said and a blush came to his
cheeks.

      "But you decided to kiss me, and that was very special, I liked it,"
Ben said.

      "It just seemed...I just...it felt right."

      "You always kiss on a first date?" Ben asked.

      Gene punched his arm. "We're not dating, damn it."

      "No...It's better than that."

      Gene giggled. "You like kissing me?"

      "Hmm...yep. Only thing I like better is tickling." And with that Ben
attacked the boy. They rolled all over the bed and then onto the floor as
Ben pursued him with abandon. It was wonderful, the kid was absolutely
ticklish everywhere. But it all came to a halt when the doorbell rang.

      "Oops, that will be Tom," Ben said.

      Gene was mess from trying to escape the attack so Ben suggested he go
wash his face and comb his hair before he came downstairs. He bounded off
to the bathroom, relieved to be away from those tickling fingers.

      Ben went downstairs to let Tom in, but all he could think about was
kissing Gene. The boy was full of surprises. He couldn't wait to tuck the
boy into bed tonight, which ought to earn him another kiss or two.

      He opened the door and Tom stepped into the house. The man had been
here so many times over the years he was close enough to feel like
family. They hugged one another and said a few words of greeting, but when
that was done they both looked up and there stood Gene at the foot of the
stairs. Maybe it was the lighting at that spot in the hall, but the boy
looked stunning as he stood there waiting for recognition.

      "Tom, this is Gene...Gene this is one of my closest friends, Tom
Braden."

      "Good to meet you, Gene," Tom said, shaking the boy's hand.

      Gene was a little stunned, but Tom affected people that way. At six
foot four, he was usually the tallest man in the room and he was built like
a line backer. They walked back through the house to the kitchen and Tom
took a seat at the table. He was an old southern boy; kitchens to him were
for more than eating.

      "So Gene, are you at Southeast?"

      "Yes, sir. I'm in tenth grade."

      "Good, but you can drop the 'sir,' everyone calls me Tom and you
should too. Hey, Ben graduated from Southeast, did you know that? Top of
his class too as I recall."

      Gene gave Ben an amazed look. "He didn't tell me that."

      Ben opened the brandy and poured a measure out for Tom to sample,
hoping the guy wouldn't get too maudlin this evening. They had a lot of
shared memories over the years, too many for the boy to digest all at
once. Ben placed a can of soda in front of Gene, not wanting him to feel
left out.

      "I expect he'll eventually tell you everything you want to know if
you give him time," Tom said, admiring the amber liquid in his glass. "You
like living here?"

      "Oh yeah, this is a great house. Ben has been just the best..." Gene
paused, studying Tom's face for a moment. "You want to know why I came
here."

      Not a question, Gene understood Tom wanted answers. Ben was amazed at
the boy's perception.

      "Yes, Gene, I do."

      "Ben was nice to me when he didn't have to be. I didn't understand at
first cause that never happened to me before. All the grown ups in my life
have been...well, fucked up. Sorry, but that's the way it seems to me. He's
the only one that cares about me."

      Ben had watched as Tom's curiosity gave way to understanding. There
was nothing duplicitous about the boy, what you see is what you got. Gene
didn't qualify his words either; he took Ben's care and concern at face
value. Tom may have been impressed, but Ben was in heaven.

      "You know, Gene, I've known this guy Ben here since he was a little
one. While most boys were greedy little snots at that age, Ben always
seemed to share with everyone."

      At that point he reached into his pants pocket and pulled out a small
metal Matchbox car, placing it on the table. It was a tiny replica of a '65
Corvette, and Ben had forgotten all about that little car, but obviously
Tom had not.

      "See this little toy, Gene? Ben gave this to me when he was about
four years old. It was his favorite. And I gather it still is considering
he finally got himself a real one. But I had been in an accident and my car
was wrecked. His father brought me over to the house that afternoon and Ben
listened as I told his parents about my accident.

      "I was pretty upset as I recall, until Ben came over and stood beside
me. He smiled up at me and placed this little car in my hand. It was all
pretty simple in his mind at that age I guess; he was giving me his car so
I wouldn't be angry. It was the nicest gesture of friendship I ever
received...here, I want you to have it."

      Gene looked down at the little toy with wonder and Ben saw his eyes
glisten with tears. Tom's gesture was not lost on the boy; he understood
the meaning of the gift. It stood for acceptance. It was an assurance that
Tom knew how crummy Gene's life had been. Sentimental value aside, that
little toy was worth some real money these days, but that wasn't the point.

      "I...I can't take it," Gene said, "It means a lot to you."

      "Sure it does, but it's only a thing. I value the people in my life a
whole hell of a lot more, and so does Ben. He proved it when he gave me
that toy at my moment of need, now it's your needs he cares about."

      "Thank you...Tom." And Ben wasn't the least bit surprised when Gene
got up, walked around the table and gave Tom a hug. The smile of
contentment on the boy's face, the large hands of a tough man rubbing his
back...these were the things Ben wanted to remember. Tom's acceptance meant
the world to both of them.

      The company meant more to Ben than the brandy. Old wine doesn't
always live up to its reputation, but people do. He watched Gene and Tom
get to know one another as they polished off the Chinese leftovers. Tom
drew the boy out, sharing his own personal experiences, but mostly letting
Gene talk about his life. It was better than any therapy Ben could have
achieved.

      But all too soon they had to call a halt to the evening, the boy had
school and Tom had a stiff morning ahead in court. He gave Gene a goodbye
hug at the door and then gave Ben a healthier crush in his massive
arms. "You did good," he whispered in Ben's ear. Then he was gone.

      Ben rinsed the glasses out in the sink while Gene placed the little
car up on the windowsill.

      "I think Tom likes you," Ben said.

      "But he loves you," Gene replied," I can tell."

      They slid into one another's arms for a hug.

      "And how do you know so much about him, you two just met?"

      "Because...because I love you too," Gene said.

      The boy leaned forward and their lips met. Ben hesitated when he felt
Gene wanted more than a little kiss, so he backed off, pretending to gasp
for air. It was close to the truth after what had just been said.

      "Oh my, you just take my breath away, young man."

      Gene giggled in response. "You do like kissing me."

      "Yup, we could go on like this all night, but someone has school
tomorrow. I believe its bedtime."

      "Hey, tomorrow is Friday...when did you want to have Dean over for
dinner?" Gene asked.

      "Hmm, I will have to cook something...how about Saturday, or Sunday
if you prefer? You guys work it out and then we'll go pick him up. You
might want to spend a little time with him during the day, that's OK with
me too."

      Gene went in the shower and Ben sat on the edge of his bed. He loves
me...the words still echoed in his head and blanketed him with warmth. The
boy hadn't pushed the issue by demanding to know if Ben loved him as
well. But he did, it was just...he was afraid of the emotion. He hadn't
shared an ounce of love with another guy since Joseph all those years ago
at college.

      Love was an investment; it was supposed to draw dividends. But Ben
was afraid of falling for the boy because the next step would be displaying
that love. All the hugs and the kisses were but a prelude to...well, in
this case a disaster. His plans to keep this thing platonic were headed for
a brick wall.

      How could he get Gene to understand? The only example of a gay couple
he'd seen was his brother and this guy Brad. He had no doubt that the boy
sought to understand why they were in love. But he was afraid of the boy's
search for that answer.

      Physical contact with me is important, Ben thought, and yet it
aroused him...and me for that matter. I couldn't avoid touching him, it
would seem like rejection. He was in a pickle here and the brine was
getting deeper. But he loves me...now Ben was concerned that at some point
Gene would want to prove it.

      As expected Gene came out of the bath with only a towel around his
waist.

      "You didn't shower?" Gene asked. "What...? You've been thinking
again."

      "Someone said they loved me, and I take that very seriously."

      Gene sat down beside him, a hand on Ben's shoulder. "I wasn't looking
for an answer right away...I'm sorry."

      "No...It's ok, it's just...I do love you and at the same time I don't
want to hurt your feelings," Ben said. "I don't want anything to get in the
way of my loving and caring for you...and it might."

      "What...what might?" Gene almost looked frightened, as if he had done
something wrong.

      "No, Gene...you've done nothing wrong, it's not you...it's me. You
see...well there's no easy way to say this...I'm gay."

      Ben didn't bow his head, taking the chance and watching Gene's eyes
for what might be revealed in those baby blues. He read the boy's emotions
as they swept through his mind. Shock...concern... understanding and then,
Thank God, back to love again.

      "Its not why I...,"Ben started to say.

      "Shh...no," Gene said, putting his fingers to Ben's lips. "I know
what you're gonna say, but don't."

      "But..."

      "But nothing, "he said, cutting Ben off. "I love you."

      Those three words shattered Ben's composure and he began to cry. His
fear had been for naught, Gene wasn't deterred, and he wept in the boy's
arms. Hands held his head, fingers stroked his hair...it was what love was
supposed to feel like.

      Gene pulled his rear up off the bed and yanked the towel from his
waist, using a corner of the soft material to dry Ben's tears. If he felt
comfortable being naked now after hearing that announcement...Ben felt
blessed. Gene was a child of untold richness in his compassion and
gentleness. And all Ben could think about was what had he done to deserve
such love. It only made him sob harder.

      "Shh...It's OK...Its fine," Gene whispered, holding Ben's head to his
chest.

      He could smell the soap on the boy's freshly washed skin, the warmth
of this contact seeping into his brain. The boy pulled him close and laid
them both back on the bed. His fingers soothed and Ben could feel kisses on
the crown of his head. His eyes were blurred with tears but they were
staring straight down at Gene's crotch.

      OK, he had been afforded a rare chance to study the boy's anatomy and
he drank in the view. Proving what, that he was a gay man? Of course that
would be his favorite part of another man's body, but this was a boy. But
he didn't look like a boy down there, and who was crying now anyways? No,
he was looking at a man's equipment on an innocent and very loving boy. The
thought made him stop crying.

      Gene fingered his hair while his other hand began to rub Ben's
back. When he had done this to the boy, Gene became aroused...was he trying
to do the same thing here? Well, it was working. But he knew the boy's
thoughts were not sexual at the moment, the proof lay before his eyes.

      "You feel better now?" Gene asked.

      Ben nodded and basked in the glow of his cock straining at the fabric
of his pants. And then the boy philosopher spoke.

      "I'm sorry you had to tell me like this...but I think I already had
it figured out anyway. You care about me...you love me...and the gay thing,
that scared you...I scared you...I'm sorry, Ben.

      "What I said to Hanover was wrong, he just shocked me with that
picture and I said the wrong thing. That worried you...you were afraid I
would say the same thing to you and...and push you away. But I don't love
him...I love you...I always will...no matter what."

      Oh God, those were precious words to hear and Ben felt the tension
drain from his body. He sat up suddenly, worried that the boy might look
down and see the tent in his crotch. Wiping the moisture from his face with
the towel, Ben looked back down at Gene who still lay sprawled across the
bed. He looked at Gene's face, careful to avoid the rest of his body.

      "I love you...because you are young and yet so wise at the same
time. I care because you're worth caring for, it gives my life meaning. I'm
sorry I got upset for no reason, you've been nothing but wonderful to
me. There's so much we need to talk about but it's late, I need a
shower...then I'll come tuck you in, OK?"

      Gene smiled, "Yes."

      Ben left him lying there, astounded at his reaction and proud, so
very proud of his boy. There were no more secrets between them, at least
none from his standpoint. It made him feel free, alive and so very much in
love.

      Ben returned after his shower and saw that Gene had put out the
lights. His still form lay under the sheet, the pale light from the hallway
reflecting from his eyes.

      "You ready to be tucked in?" Ben asked.

      "Yup, I waited for you," Gene replied.

      Ben could see that the sheet had an unusually large bulge right at
about crotch level. The boy was erect...had he been masturbating? All this
talk about love and caring must have turned him on just as it had affected
me, Ben thought. Erections on boys, a most normal state of affairs.

      He pulled the sheet up a bit and leaned down for the kiss, placing
his hands on either side of Gene's torso. He leaned down and the boy leaned
up, his hands reaching behind Ben's neck. Their lips met...and never
parted.

      Gene held him there, his lips pressing, grinding with passion. Ben
felt a tongue push against his lips and he went with the flow, parting his
lips and allowing Gene into his mouth.  The boy knew what he was doing and
Ben returned the intensity with his own tongue.

      Their only point of contact was lips and hands, and that was
fine. They had to get these feelings sorted out. Ben heard the boy moan,
his tongue working in a frenzy of motion...he groaned and a shudder
traveled through his whole body shaking the bed beneath them.

      Gene went limp and their lips parted.

      "Oh My God...I...."

      But he didn't have to say it, Ben knew...the smell of his young seed
filled the room. The boy had orgasmed without touching himself, probably a
first for him.

      "I...I..."

      "You ejaculated. My, what an inspired kiss....good for my ego."

      Gene was in shock as Ben reached over and turned on the bedside
lamp. Sure enough, the sheet surrounding the boy's crotch area was soaked
and small dribbles still oozed up through the fabric. It had been a monster
ejaculation, judging by the size of the stain. A total hands free
explosion.

      Gene looked up with trepidation, afraid there would be anger at the
mess. Ben could only smile.

      "You must have been playing with it while I was in the shower, that's
my guess. Our kissing just pulled the trigger, that's all. I'm happy for
you," he said. And a little envious to boot, at least someone was getting
release around here.

      "You're not....mad?"

      Ben walked into the bathroom and wet a hand towel.

      "No, why would I be?" he yelled back.

      He returned and handed Gene the towel.

      "You clean up and I'll change the sheets, OK?"

      "I spunked when I kissed you...I couldn't stop myself."

      "Lucky devil," Ben chuckled, but the look in those eyes stopped his
laughter. "No, Gene...it doesn't mean you're gay, is that what you think?"

      "Well...yeah....sorta...shouldn't I wonder?"

      "Oh My God, I've made him gay with a kiss...forgive me Lord."

      Gene giggled this time. "No, you only kissed me...I did the rest."

      "You sure did," Ben said, pealing the sodden sheet away from his
belly. "You been saving up for this?"

      They both looked down at the load of semen splashed across the boy's
torso; it was amazing what a boy can produce over and over again. Ben would
have to save up for weeks to get that large a deposit. Gene wiped himself
while Ben rolled the sheet up and dropped it in the laundry hamper. There
were fresh sheets on the top shelf of the closet. Gene got out of bed and
stood there with the towel in his hand.

      "What should I do with this?" he asked.

      "In the hamper, I'll throw that stuff in the laundry first thing in
the morning," Ben said.

      "You don't think I'm gay...do you?"

      "I don't know how to answer that, Gene. How should I know? I mean it
just happened, you were turned on and your body went into overload...ba
boom, it happened."

      "But it was you, Ben...you made me feel this way. I...oh, I was...I
was thinking about kissing you and I started playing with myself and then
you came back in the room in your boxers and I just had to kiss you and my
body started to tingle all over and I didn't know it was going to happen
and then it just did..." He ran out of breath.

      Ben took the towel from his hand and tossed it in with the sheet. He
remade the bed as Gene stood watching...waiting for a reaction. He turned
the sheet back and stood in front of the boy.

      "I'm flattered that you find me attractive, I mean that. But I think
you have a crush on me because I've been kind to you and taken care of your
needs. As for any fantasy about me...I don't know, we haven't discussed
your sexual feelings outside of a craving for young Mexican girls...and now
is not the time to start that. You sleep on it, Gene. I'm not one to shy
away from a serious talk about anything, especially with you. I love you,
you love me...go to sleep with that on your mind tonight, I know I will."

      With that Ben held the sheet back as the boy climbed into bed. A kiss
on the forehead and he turned out the light. At least Gene was smiling when
he left the room...Ben was trembling.



Chapter 8

      Friday morning finally came. How he had been able to fall asleep last
night...well it was nothing short of a miracle. The kiss, the boy's groans
and the smell of his young essence haunted Ben for most of the night.

      "You don't think I'm gay....do you?" Gene had asked...and what if he
was? He'd had experiences with his brother, his kissing talents showed that
much. Did genetics have anything to do with this or was Gene feeling
influenced, by Dean of course, it couldn't be his doing.

      Ben washed his face and looked at the top half of his torso in the
mirror. Gene had been thinking about him and masturbating. It was
flattering, any gay man would feel that way, and it felt wrong too...but
that was silly. At seventeen Ben had drooled over the college boys who lay
shirtless on the grass over at the university. It was ok to look, but would
he have hesitated if they had responded to his stares?

      It had been his reaction to the kiss that was astounding. He had gone
with it, reveled in it, returned it...and with such results. He had allowed
the boy to play out the fantasy and look what had happened. That orgasm
would be on Gene's mind all day and he would be looking forward to the next
kiss. Ben felt like he was in over his head.

      He fully dressed before presenting himself in Gene's room. Again the
sheets were back, the cock exposed. Maybe he should turn the heat down
lower at night, which would keep the boy covered up. Good thing that hose
was covered last night, the shots would have hit the wall. He pulled the
sheet up to cover that magnificent appendage.

      He kissed Gene awake and smiled as the boy's eyes opened.

      "Morning, love," he said "How's about some breakfast?"

      "Oh Lord, gotta pee," Gene exclaimed as he leapt out of bed.

      His cock led him into the bathroom and Ben chuckled.

      "How do you pee when it's so darn stiff?" He asked.

      "Gotta sit down...only way to hit the target," Gene yelled back.

      Ben sat on the bed and his hand wandered across the pillow, still
warm from the boy's head. He could almost feel the disapproval Tom would
glare at him if the man knew what had transpired last night. Legally he had
not touched the boy enough to get in real trouble...but then who was he
kidding, it had been sexual at Gene's instance

      Ben didn't hear the boy come back in the room, but when he looked up
Gene was there by the door. His hair was messed up, his cock hung
limply...almost, but his nakedness only added to the appeal. And the boy
stood there calm as could be while Ben gazed at him in wonder.

      "Gene...I suppose you ought to get dressed..."he began.

      "I like being naked with you...and you like it too," the boy said,
reading his mind.

      Ben smiled. "Yes...suppose I do. Do you think what happened last
night was...was an accident?"

      "Um...I don't know, it never happened before," Gene said.

      "But you want it to happen again...don't you?"

      "Uh...I guess...yes."

      "Do you think of it as having sex with me?" Ben asked. "What I'm
getting at, I suppose, is do you consider what happened last night to be
sex between us? In your mind...did we have sex?"

      Gene looked confused and shook his head. "No."

      He walked over to the bed and sat down beside Ben,

      "Did we have sex?" Gene asked.

      "Not really, it was more like you masturbated while I was there," Ben
said.

      "Masturbation isn't like real sex," Gene said. "It's only real if you
fuck someone."

      Ben thought about that a moment. "Did your brother tell you that?"

      "Yeah...him and Brad."

      "So if Brad had managed to get in your pants and masturbate you...no,
you thought he wanted to perform oral on you...do you think a blow job is
real sex?"

      "No...only fucking, I said that. Blow jobs don't count as sex."

      Oh Lord, Ben thought, where did the boy come up with that?

      "And this is what Brad and Dean think too?" Ben asked.

      "Yeah, cause Dean and I...."

      Gene stopped in mid sentence. Ben knew the boy faced telling a gay
guy that he had sucked a cock, even if it was his brother's.

      "I'm sorry. Don't tell me any more, Gene. I never want you to be
uncomfortable around me ever again, OK?"

      "But you think its sex, don't you?"

      "It doesn't matter what I think. I'm sure you only did what you
wanted to do and it felt good when it happened, that's all that matters,"
Ben said.

      Gene blushed. "I fucked Dean too."

      Ben didn't want to act surprised but maybe he did a little. It was
only kid's stuff they were doing after all.

      "I'm sure you guys were only experimenting, all kids do that to some
degree," he said.

      "He wanted to fuck me too but I wouldn't let him...it scared me too
much. Doesn't it hurt when you get fucked?" Gene asked.

      Ben wasn't sure he wanted to have this discussion with the boy, not
now anyway. It was a positive thing that he was curious about stuff like
this. But something deep inside said the boy had other motives for asking.

      "Gene, its seven o'clock in the morning and you want to talk about
sex...can it wait or do you have to know right now?"

      "I just thought..." And then he sighed.

      "Gene...sweetie, don't get all worked up. Now that you know I'm gay
you'll have all kinds of questions and that's a good thing. I will try and
answer each and every one of them to the best of my ability....just not
now, OK?"

      "OK...but you'll tell me the truth, right?"

      "Oh sweetie, I love you and that means I have to tell you the truth
about everything. Lies can destroy love and I don't want that to happen to
us."

      "Me too," Gene said.

      Ben kissed the boy and shoved him towards the shower. He listened to
the water bouncing off the shower curtain, Gene hadn't closed the door. OK,
some of this explained the exhibitionist tendencies the boy had. Ben knew
the kid was in some way trying to be seductive; he wanted sex or was it not
sex in his mind? Either way, it seems that if Ben was willing a whole lot
more that kissing might happen between them.

      If the boy had questions, Ben had his own list which was growing by
leaps and bounds. Would Gene suck a cock? Did he want to fuck? Oh, none of
this was rational but Ben knew that Gene would only keep after him until he
got what he wanted.

      Giving the boy information seemed like a good thing, he needed to
know the right way to think about things. Then why the hell had Dean
convinced his brother that oral sex wasn't sex at all? Dean felt secure
being gay, but Gene didn't, that was the answer. If it wasn't considered
sex then Gene would do it if it felt good and Dean would be the
beneficiary. That was slightly warped and more than a little unfair.

      Ben dropped the boy at school and almost sighed with relief as he
watched the kid walk towards the building. He needed time to think, time to
come up with some answers. It was beginning to feel like the undercurrent
in their relationship had become a battle of wills, and he couldn't let
Gene win.

      The world around him was full of pre-Halloween angst where neither
Thanksgiving nor Christmas dominated and yet both were already begging for
attention. Ben sat at the stoplight on Third watching as a city crew
mounted Christmas decorations on a lamppost. It seemed just like another
sign of the yearly economic dash for the almighty dollar.

      Ben got a wave from Flo as he entered the lobby; she covered the
mouthpiece on her phone for a moment.

      "You have some papers on your desk from Tom, a courier just brought
them," she said before going back to her phone conversation.

      Ben looked over the custody release and medical POA that his attorney
had sent over. The guy sure worked fast, and then he looked at the third
document in the pile. It was a police report on Gene's parents.

      Dated five years back, the report confirmed what Ben already knew;
the parents were unfit to raise children. It seems that Dean, age eleven,
had informed his fifth grade classmates all about the meaning of sexual
intercourse. The teacher was astounded after overhearing a part of the
conversation and had reported such to the principal. But then, when several
of the kid's parents called in to complain about Dean's 'education' of
their children, the principal had to take corrective measures.

      Dean was examined by a psychiatrist working for the police, and the
facts which came to light spoke for themselves. Both boys had been made to
watch while the parents had sexual intercourse in front of them. Ben's hand
shook as he read the description Dean gave the doctor during her
investigation. It was sick, disgusting and more than a little perverted
when the boys were forced to participate in the act.

      The police filed child sex abuse charges against the parents but both
boys refused to cooperate. A judge threw the case out, there was nothing
the DA could do. But he did have the parents watched for a while. That led
to the drug conviction and robbery charges which finally snared Gene's
father and sent him to prison.

      Ben was beyond wondering why adults like that even bothered to have
children; he had seen and heard so much over the years it was numbing. But
if he ever needed confirmation about why the bitch should never talk to her
son again, here it was.

      Dean had probably fared better after the incident, his gay identity
giving him a reasonable means of disassociating himself from the
activity. But Gene, how did he cope? It was a positive that the boy still
identified himself as a virgin. That meant the forced intercourse he had
with his mother didn't signify in his self identity. But it seems neither
boy had any love left for the woman who bore them, and she probably
wondered why...how sick can you get?

      It only added to his angst throughout the day and Ben shifted
listlessly through his paperwork, resigning himself to finishing out the
morning before calling it quits at lunchtime. Flo didn't question his
leaving early; after all, he was the boss.

      Ben sat in his car outside the grocery store and sorted through his
feelings. He loved the boy and yet now he knew why Gene knew so little
about his sexual feelings, they had been repressed. The parents had beaten
the boys, engaged in sexual activity with their sons and damn near starved
them to death. Right now Ben would have gladly paid any price to have both
creatures rubbed off the face of the planet.

      From his experience, he knew that child abuse affected children their
whole lives, long after the initial activity had ceased. Molested boys
often became abusers themselves, a sick testament to the ongoing struggle
they felt about their own sexual identity. Dean was immersed in a loving
gay relationship, a rejection of the twisted heterosexual activity he had
been forced to accept as a child. That was his way out, his escape from the
guilt.

      But even now Dean could become aggressive, acting out at some point
in the future. Ben wondered what Brad really knew about his little underage
lover. Searching his thoughts for a feeling about that relationship, Ben
could almost find no fault in what the man had done. Sure it was illegal,
but then society had done nothing to protect the boy either. Wasn't he
entitled to the love he now shared with Brad? The man had rescued the boy,
he must know something of Dean's past.

      But then there was Gene. He had been abused, lied to about the very
nature of sexual activity and left to founder. Exhibiting his body gave the
boy sexual feelings he didn't understand, that was a sign of acting out. It
was becoming more obvious that he wanted Ben to tell him...to show him what
sex was all about. But how could he without feeling like he was betraying
the boy?

      Even if it were legal, was it right? When he turned eighteen Gene
would still question his feelings about what he was. It would be simpler if
the boy turned out to be gay like Dean, he could distance himself from that
awful experience. But now, after knowing what had happened, how could Ben
even know if gay sex wasn't just another stage of acting out from the
abuse?

      He pushed the grocery cart around the aisles for a while and stopped,
his mind still spinning out scenarios. Why was he here? Oh yes, Dean was
coming to dinner. At least it would give him a chance to observe the boys
interacting. That really wasn't fair when he was in love with one of them,
but there you are. He told himself that it would all be in Gene's best
interest.

      Ben shelved the thoughts and shopped, filling his mental order sheet
with soups and salads instead of the reality he was facing. What if Brad
came, would he be able to talk reasonably with the man? How could he
discuss an illicit relationship with someone who was in a position to know
better?

      He almost ran the cart into an employee stocking the shelves. He
apologized and hurried around the corner to hide his embarrassment. Who was
he to pass judgment on Brad? Love mattered...and if Brad and Dean were in
love...wasn't he almost in the same position with Gene? It seemed like he
was jockeying himself into accepting a relationship with Gene...one that
could turn sexual at any moment, if it hadn't already.

      Where were the parental feelings he had harbored only the day before?
Oh yes, Gene had rejected that approach, his parents were assholes. Could
he see himself as Gene's lover? His heart was pounding in his chest, the
anxiety came over him and Ben hurried towards the Men's room, abandoning
his shopping cart in the middle of an aisle.

      He leaned over the sink and splashed cold water on his face from the
tap. He wasn't sick, no...he felt fine. He was scared...of himself. Was he
capable of loving Gene without giving in to the sexuality the boy was
pressing on him?

      Ben looked up into the mirror and recalled the promises he had made
to himself. He noticed the jagged line running through the reflection, this
mirror was cracked...and so was he. For if anything was certain, he now
knew all those words meant absolutely nothing if Gene truly wanted him as a
lover.