Date: Thu, 15 Jun 2006 03:58:19 -0700
From: fritz@nehalemtel.net
Subject: I Love Corey, Chapter Eighty-two

	Boy, I don't know why you are here again reading this stupid
disclaimer.  Surely you have better things to do with your life.  Still, if
you're bound and determined to read one then I suppose I'd better write
one.  Since I'm very bored with writing them, maybe by doing it backwards
it will go better.
	Moving right along, if you have any complaints, questions,
comments, or suggestions just send them to fritz@nehalemtel.net Be sure to
put "I Love Corey" in the subject line so I don't terminate your email with
my delete key.  While I'll admit to a sort of fiendish glee when using that
key, you wouldn't want your email to be the object of that key would you?
	I hope that my writing it backwards won't prove too distracting to
my trusty editor.  Poor Don slaves away looking for mistakes so you don't
have to.  The problem is that I sometimes don't agree with him and just
stick them in anyway.  I freely confess that I should know better because
most anyone has a better knowledge of grammar and spelling than I do, but
sometimes I just can't resist.  What else can you expect from my somewhat
demented mind?
	This story is posted on Nifty for your enjoyment and as such is
free for non-commercial uses.  If you can figure out a good commercial use
for it, please contact me and we will discuss how to split all our
financial rewards.  In the meantime feel free to quote from it if you think
you see anything worth quoting, but do give me credit for such a quote.
	I really don't know how to make it any plainer, but the story is
fiction and as such none of the characters are real and none of the events
ever took place.  It is merely the musings of a somewhat demented mind.
How demented?  Well I have a hard time judging that so you will have to
form your own opinion.  I wouldn't spend a lot of time on that problem if I
were you.  It might drive you as nuts as I am and you wouldn't want that.
	Continuing on, we are now up to the place where I tell all people,
who live in an area in which the reading of this story is against the law
that they need to move or make sure no one knows they are reading such a
sinful story.  Since I still have no better suggestions, I'll leave it at
that.
	Next we come to the segment where I have to address the question of
what to do with people who are offended by reading descriptions of gay sex.
About all I can say is I don't know of anyone forcing you to read them so
quit your bitching.  Unless you can prove that someone forced you to read
this story, I have little sympathy for you.  Besides, if someone forced you
to read this story, shouldn't you be directing your anger at him instead of
me?
	Lastly, those of you below legal age really shouldn't be reading
this story.  Actually, you should be out doing some of the things described
in it rather than reading about them.  Take my word for it; doing is a lot
more fun than reading.  Just remember to have a good sense of humor as
things rarely go just like we planned them.  I would remind you of the old
saying that practice makes perfect.  Now go do your practicing.  While you
may never become perfect, it's a lot of fun trying.
	And now gentle readers, with all that out of the way it is time for
the next chapter.  I hope you enjoy it.  By the way, I tried writing it
truly backwards, but my feeble mind rebelled so I just changed the order of
the paragraphs, but that is about the best I could do.  Writing words like
"wohemos" in place of "somehow" was simply too much for me.  Besides, my
spell-check really hated it.  ztirF

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		     I Love Corey, Chapter Eighty-two

	It was one of those nights which didn't appear to be going
anywhere, at least on the loving front that is.  Corey just cuddled up in
his usual place and we were idly talking about nothing in particular.  My
right hand kept gently rubbing his shoulder and my mind sort of drifted,
wondering how a human shoulder could feel so good.  The skin was warm and
smooth, and every once in a while he would move his arm a little and I
could feel the muscles move beneath that soft skin.  Then he decided to
kiss me goodnight and he held it a little longer than usual.  To kiss me he
had rolled up on top of me somewhat, and his chest was now on my chest with
his body at sort of an angle so that only our chests were touching.  Well,
that and our lips.  For whatever reason, I now had both hands on his back,
feeling and exploring as I ran my hands lightly over his shoulder blades
and all across his back, and I was really enjoying feeling his soft warm
skin and the way my fingertips could trace various parts of him.  There
were things like shoulder blades vertebrae, and muscles to explore and they
all belonged to my Corey.  Corey broke the kiss and raised his head and I
could feel the play of muscles in his back from that motion.  His eyes were
blue pools that seemed to draw me in and then he lowered his head again and
we kissed some more.
	I'd given lots of massages to people and I knew what bodies felt
like, but with Corey there was some sort of difference.  I mean there was
this sense of excitement that seemed to emanate from somewhere inside him
and travel through his skin and into my fingertips, yet maybe excitement
isn't the word, perhaps it was more a sense of belonging and fulfillment
that seemed to fill me.  There were so many feelings going through me that
I lack the words to even begin to describe them.  There was a feeling of
contentment along with some desire, some dashes of passion, and all the
other things I lack words for that the whole effect was to leave me with a
warm and fuzzy feeling inside.  Then his tongue started seeking entrance to
my mouth and suddenly I could taste his still faintly toothpaste-flavored
tongue.
	Naturally all that kissing had effects on other parts of both of
us.  He squirmed around so he was a little more on top of me and I could
feel "Little Corey", which really could no longer be called little, jabbing
me in the hip.  Now I know that "Little Corey" is no warmer than the rest
of Corey, but it always felt almost like it would burn me if I didn't do
something about it.  Yet I was enjoying the kisses so much, along with the
feel of his muscles rippling down his back as he squirmed around that there
seemed to be no hurry to do more, and so I just kept kissing and enjoying
all the feelings going through me.  Ever so often he would break the kiss
and raise his head and we would just stare into each other's eyes.  Each
time that happened it was almost like his eyes were some kind of trigger
and my heart would just speed up a few more beats per minute.  I could get
lost in his eyes, but my heart might not stand it.
	By now he was clear on top of me with his legs straddled out on
each side.  To add to it, my temperature must have climbed at least one
hundred degrees judging by the fire in my heart, and of course I was
sweating.  My hands had drifted down and now were no longer touching his
back, but instead were gripping and massaging those perfect globes of his
butt.  So far we had done nothing more than kiss and we both seemed to be
happy with that.  Since we both were happy with kissing, it just kept
lasting and lasting, and along the way we both kept sweating.  After a
while I begin to notice that we were no longer really sticking together,
but rather we were slipping back and forth each time one of us moved.
	Finally my fingers started exploring that cleft between those two
globes, and when that happened, well, Corey sort of twitched.  By now there
was plenty of sweat and sliding against each other.  Each time my fingers
touched that place, he would jerk and wriggle, and more slipping and
sliding would take place.  I wasn't hurrying it because I was lost in a
warm safe place with Corey and was enjoying it there.
	After a while I quit massaging his butt and let my fingers do more
exploring in that cleft.  I wasn't really pressing down with my fingers,
but instead was just letting them lightly explore all the little ridges and
whorls that they could feel.  However that exploring had a dramatic effect
on Corey.  Each time one of my fingers lightly traced those circular
patterns of muscle, it produced what could only be described as a thrust.
Feeling his warm body slide over "Junior" produced about the same reaction
from me and so we started thrusting against each other.  The more of those
thrusts we did, the more they increased in both length and strength.  Corey
slithered down to where "Little Corey" and "Junior" were more side-by-side
and we were no longer kissing.  Now his head was draped on my shoulder and
I could hear his panting and grunting.
	Sometime later my body started reacting to that feeling that has
been around since the beginning of time.  It started deep inside and soon
my toes curled up and about the same time I could feel the muscles of
Corey's ass become rigid.  I could feel my ass trying to rise off of the
bed in a great spasm, and Corey seemed determined to push it back down.
His breathing had now turned into gasps.  Those gasps were timed to the
rhythm of his body trying to push me back down. Our bodies struggled
against each other with neither winning, but both enjoying it.
	Then it was over and he just lay there on top of me, lightly
panting.  My hands fell on the bed and I was totally spent.  Yet even
though I couldn't raise my hands, for some silly reason I felt I could whip
the world if necessary.  Even with all the weakness it was like I was
somehow energized and had the strength to overcome any trials or obstacles
which might be in my way.
	About all I can say is that it was a good thing that the bed
normally got changed on Saturday mornings because it really needed it.
Ucky doesn't begin to describe it.  Now icky and kind of crusty is much
closer.  Of course there was a bunch of giggling and touching in the shower
while we tried to make ourselves at least a little more presentable than
the bed.  We succeeded in that after quite a lot of effort, but it's a good
thing the shower had a drain to get rid of all the evidence.  Otherwise the
shower might have been in even worse shape than the bed.  For some reason I
really didn't need my usual cup of coffee to get my mind going and I just
sort of bounced out to the kitchen.  I was rummaging through the fridge and
humming to myself when Kath came wandering into the kitchen to see what was
happening and get her caffeine fix.  She gave me a strange look and took
her coffee over to the table and started in on the morning paper.  I wasn't
finding much that looked good, so I settled on omelets.  Somehow with all
that had been going on I hadn't done as good a job of shopping as usual and
once breakfast was out of the way I was going to have to go buy some
groceries.
	I found a few things I thought might go well in the omelets, like
the last of the prosciutto, a couple of avocados, a couple of tomatoes, and
some shallots.  So I diced the prosciutto and shallots and fried them in a
little butter.  The avocados and the two small tomatoes were diced and
mixed with some mayonnaise and the last of the sour cream.  I had some hash
browns cooking while doing all that and when they were done it was time to
do something with the eggs.  I proceeded to crack two dozen eggs and mixed
them with some cream and the usual salt and pepper.  I was now ready to
cook omelets.  By this time Corey had plenty of orange juice squeezed and
LT was making toast.
	I had a non-stick sauté pan that I used only for omelets so I
started in by heating it pretty hot.  Then in went a about a tablespoon of
butter which promptly started sizzling.  I swirled the butter around and up
the sides some and as soon as the bubbles started to subside I added just
over half a cup of the egg mixture and gave the pan a quick shake and
swirl.  Some of the prosciutto-shallot mixture went on top of the eggs
followed by me jerking the pan towards me in little short motions.  A quick
jerk of a couple inches followed by a slower movement back over the burner
and then another of the quick movements soon the caused the omelet to roll
up on one side of the pan. The next step was to dump it on a plate and
spoon a little of the avocado-tomato-sour cream mixture on top.  The pan
was once again heating while I put the mixture on the omelets.  As soon as
that was done I handed the plate with the omelet to JJ who added some of
the hash browns and then handed it to LT for the toast.  Kath's eyes about
bugged out when she realized I was making a completed omelet about every
thirty seconds.  The boys and I had done this many times before and had it
down to where there was little wasted motion.  In fact, omelets were one of
those handy dishes I sometimes fixed for either lunch or dinner, along with
cooking them for breakfasts, and the boys were always after me to fix them
and were more than willing to help.
	After the omelets were history we sat around discussing the day.
The Sterretts were coming for dinner and to discuss setting up a Mail Crew
type operation.  Things always seemed to keep interfering with that and
maybe tonight we could finally get somewhere.  We added some discussion of
what to cook and what housework needed doing and finally it was time to get
going.
	The boys were going to change their beds and get the laundry
started while Kath and I went grocery shopping.  They were supposed to
clean their rooms also, but I wasn't going to hold my breath on that.
Hopefully they would get most of their dirty clothes picked up and ready to
wash.
	I just love it when things really work out.  Chuck Tanner, Rob's
friend, was working the meat department and I was bemoaning the lack of
chicken scraps for chicken stock.  Much to my surprise he just grinned and
asked me how much I needed as some had just come in and he was getting them
thawed enough to package up so he could start selling them tomorrow.  With
great glee I bought a forty-pound case which had four ten-pound bags of
chicken backs, tails, necks, and other scraps.  While I was at it, I also
ordered some beef bones for beef stock for next weekend.  When that was
completed it was time to stock up on those things I was getting low on
along with what I wanted to cook tonight.  A couple cases of oranges went
in the cart along with a ten-pound sack of onions.  That didn't seem right
so I threw in another sack of onions as I needed some for the stock.  I
filled a cart up and got another one and Kath's eyes were bugging out.  I
was also getting low on flour so in went a twenty-five pound bag.  The
stock would also require celery and carrots, so a big bag of carrots and
several bunches of celery were added and I still didn't have anything for
dinner.  Then a great idea popped into my head.  Since the object of the
cooking lesson was going to be on seasoning, why not work on something like
spaghetti and let the boys do most of the work?  We could start with just
the tomatoes and go from there.  That way they could learn just what adding
each ingredient did for the taste.  So we added some more things to the
carts and soon were working on a third cart.  That isn't really as bad as
it sounds because items like a case of toilet paper take up a lot of space,
and so did the case of chicken scraps and the boxes of oranges, but
obviously Kath had never bought in these quantities.  While Downie's gave a
very slight discount for case lots, price wasn't the reason I shopped the
way I did.  Mainly I hated always running out of something and having to
drive to the store and pick it up.  If an item would keep I saw no reason
not to buy lots of it and save all those trips.  So we added a case of
canned tomatoes, along with a half a flat of fresh ones.  Kath finally did
comment that she now understood why I had driven the pickup.
	I finally got all four shopping carts to the checkout stand and
while the checkers were checking things through I got the pickup and parked
it right in the loading area.  As soon as one cartload had been checked and
bagged it was taken out and loaded in the pickup while the checker worked
on the next one.  I'm not totally dumb so the snacks were the first things
checked through so they would be clear to the front of the pickup bed and
the boys would have to bring the rest of the stuff in before they could get
to them.  I'd learned that doing it that way saved a certain amount of
nagging on my part and whining on the boys' part.  As long as I left the
canopy on it worked reasonably well.  When the back of the pickup was
almost full and the carts empty, we headed home to see if the house was
still standing.
	The house was still there and the boys had even accomplished a
little.  Truthfully I can't say their rooms looked great, but they had
changed and made up their beds, and there didn't appear to be any dirty
clothes lying on the floor.  All in all it looked better than I expected,
but not as good as I'd hoped.  My plan had worked perfectly and the
groceries were soon packed in so the boys could grab a few snacks.  Since
that had worked so well, it was now time to see if my other plan would
work.
	Actually it went pretty well.  I got out the big roaster and we
started in making a huge batch of spaghetti sauce.  However, there were no
spices or salt or pepper in it.  Then I took a small bowl and took some of
the sauce from the roaster and we started adding things like garlic, salt,
pepper, and so on.  We would add a little, taste it, and then a little
more.  When it finally started to be too much, it was get another bowl and
move on to the next spice.  By the time it was over, we had we had tested
each spice and learned how it affected the flavor.  With that in mind we
dumped it all back together and started bringing the whole batch up to what
it should be.  Upon completion of that it tasted slightly overcooked, but I
grabbed a few more fresh tomatoes and another couple onions and after
dicing and sautéing them I added them which seemed to remove the slightly
overcooked taste.  Now we had a bunch of sauce for the freezer and some for
dinner tonight.  Next it was a matter of making the meatballs, but that
didn't take long.  I had to show them that it was possible to sauté just a
small bite of the meatball mixture so we could check seasoning and soon
they seemed to have it all figured out.  All in all, it went pretty well
except the kitchen was now a total disaster area.  Unsurprisingly, the boys
were not the neatest of cooks.  I wasn't going to complain because not only
had the boys learned something about seasoning, Kath had been right in
there tasting and seeing just what was needed.  I swear I could almost see
her mind working as she filed away the knowledge on how each spice acted
and tasted.  Judy had told me that no one in Kath's family could cook and
perhaps this was the first time she had ever seen any experimenting with
spices and what effect each spice had on the taste of the dish.
	I'd cheated along the way with the cooking lesson and had started
both a batch of clam chowder and a batch of chicken stock.  Needless to say
the boys were starved after all their work in the kitchen so the chowder
took a major hit.  As for me, I ate a big bowl also as I knew I would need
lots energy to clean the kitchen up.  I tend to be somewhat on the sloppy
side when cooking, but alongside the boys I was neatness personified.
      The boys decided they wanted to go to the mall and check out the
latest video games and CD's and owing to the fact the weather was nice they
would ride their bikes, so there went my bike again.  I was beginning to
think that buying myself a bike was a lost cause, and perhaps even a poor
idea because every time I did another boy came along and needed one.  The
sparkle in Danny's eyes as he and the other boys raced out of the driveway
and headed for town made up for watching my new bike take off without me.
The boys didn't appear to harbor the least amount of guilt over the fact
that I still had a messy kitchen to clean up.  Oh well, at least they had
done a little better than normal at cleaning their rooms, and hopefully
Kath profited from the cooking lesson.  I suppose I shouldn't complain
about it because it only took me just over an hour to clean the mess up
what with having to mop the floor where they had spilled tomatoes and other
things.
	The rest of the afternoon was pretty quiet except that Judy stopped
in and said their house was once again together enough for them to sleep in
the bedrooms and thanked me for the use of the trailer.  After she left I
hooked onto the trailer and moved it far enough ahead to empty the holding
tanks and get them washed out while Kath ran the bedding and towels through
the washer and dryer.  I wondered how we might handle any traveling with
Kath along because there simply weren't enough beds for all of us, and
looking the trailer over offered no solutions.  While it was a lovely
trailer and something that a couple of people would be more than
comfortable in, it simply had not been designed for the number of people
who would now need places to sleep.  In fact with seven there had been a
shortage of room and even without Danny it wasn't exactly spacious.  Still,
I didn't really have any ideas on what to do about that situation.  I
decided I would think on it later.
	Kath and I spent a few minutes paying the bills and entering all
the data in the budget form she had set up.  So far it didn't seem like it
would take too much time or effort to do so and maybe the information would
prove useful.  When I set up an entry for allowances and filled in the
amount that produced a conversation on what would be considered a proper
allowance for kids in the age group of the boys.  Kath had been short of
funds so she was now going to raise Danny's allowance so it matched that of
the boys.
	That conversation drifted into the area of the boys and their money
and I showed her what the boys had set up for their money and explained
about the matching of any they wanted to save.  Like everything else, once
a subject was brought up it soon veered off into other things and the next
thing I knew we were discussing the retirement program I was having set up
for her and how much she wanted to contribute to it.  I didn't have enough
information to fill her in on all the details as I hadn't yet received the
finished plan, but she was definitely surprised that I was setting one up
for her.  Of course that also led to health insurance and other things and
before we knew it the boys were back and it was getting close to time for
the Sterretts to arrive.  Somehow that few minutes of entering the data had
taken the rest of the afternoon what with all the topics it had brought up.
	I was busy peeling garlic for the garlic bread when the Sterretts
arrived.  Kath was aghast at the amount I was peeling and I could see her
fidgeting around while watching, but I knew that after it was under the
broiler for a while the sharp bite of raw garlic would be gone and then it
would not taste as overpowering as she thought it was going to.
	I yelled at Corey to fix Ron and Jill a drink and he was soon
stirring up a batch of cocktails, specifically a batch of Margaritas, so we
could relax a little and enjoy a drink before dinner.  He was getting about
half good at bartending and I was busy right then.  When he handed me my
Margarita, I could see a few grains of salt on his lips and I raised my
eyebrows and gave him one of those looks that parents sometimes give their
kids.  He had the decency to blush, but soon figured out a way to escape
the company of the adults.
	I didn't exactly follow him, but when I stepped into the family
room and checked out the wet bar it was no surprise that there was an empty
glass with traces of salt still on the rim.  I could also hear a bunch of
giggling coming from his bedroom so I figured all the boys had retreated
there to be out of sight.  It was probably mean, but I knocked on the
bedroom door and when Corey opened it, I suggested it was time to set the
table.  I hadn't seen any glasses missing, and they didn't appear to be
hiding anything so I figured they had all had a sip or two of the extra he
had mixed.  The only thing I didn't know was just how much extra was
involved.  They all looked so guilty that any jury in the land would have
convicted them in a heartbeat.  Danny and Cody looked like they were trying
to disappear and the others were trying to look innocent.  Of course that
only made them look all the more guilty.  I suppose I could have made a big
deal of it and chewed them out, but I distinctly remembered doing exactly
the same thing.  I also remembered getting the same type of look from Dad.
I hurried back to the kitchen before I burst out laughing at them, and now
I was wondering if that was why Dad had suddenly found something else he
had to take care of when he caught me sneaking a sip or two of some of the
drinks I had made for either he and Mom.  All I can say is there was now a
dead silence as I left Corey's room and headed back to the kitchen.
	What can I say?  It was not quite five minutes before Mark
appeared, and it almost looked like he had been pushed into sight.  I
wondered if this was a case of the bigger and stronger pushing the smaller
and weaker forward to see if they survived.  Then Danny appeared, looking
like he stumbled over the carpet or something.  They sort of slunk over to
the cupboard and started getting some plates and things out and then more
boys appeared.  At least the later ones didn't stumble or look like they
had been pushed into the kitchen.  I was really having a hard time
containing my laughter so I suggested that since the boys had made the
sauce and fixed the meatballs, maybe they ought to finish cooking dinner
and the adults could retire to the family room and continue visiting.
	Yes I'm cruel, because now the boys were really trapped.  They
desperately wanted to get out of sight and they didn't want to finish
cooking the dinner.  I could almost see their little minds spinning as they
weighed their options, and then their shoulder sag as they saw they really
didn't have any good ones.  There wasn't all that much to do as all that
was left was to put the green salad together, heat the sauce and the
meatballs, and smear the butter-garlic-cheese mixture on the bread and
stick it under the broiler for a few minutes.  The water was heating for
the pasta and since all but Danny and Cody were well familiar with what
needed to be done I figured they could handle it.
	All of a sudden Corey seemed to straighten up and take charge.
When he did that, I gathered up the other four adults and we went into the
family room to continue visiting.  When we finally got out of the boys
sight a few snickers broke out.  Kath had missed it, but Jill and Ron had
picked up on what was going on.  I quietly whispered what had happened to
Kath, and she started giggling along with us.  Ah well, I was left with the
thought that all I could do was love the little knuckleheads and try to
help them grow up without them getting hurt too badly.  So far they were
doing the same things I had done when growing up and I'd survived.
	We had time for a second drink which I mixed, much to the
disappointment of the boys because they didn't get the leftovers.  Finally
the boys announced it was time to eat.
	Not only was I surprised, I was pleased at what they had done.  The
salad had suddenly acquired some cubes of salami, some croutons from the
supply, some diced cheese, a few diced tomatoes, and some olives and was
served on separate salad plates.  It really looked nice.  As for the actual
spaghetti, they served it individually instead of putting everything in
bowls and allowing each person to take as much as he wanted.  Their
helpings were a little large, but I was sure they wouldn't have any
problems with them even if the adults might not be able to eat that large a
serving.  The garlic bread was nicely browned on top and neatly arranged on
serving platters so their presentation looked almost professional.  I had
to needle them a little by telling everyone to blame any upset stomachs on
the fact that the boys had actually cooked it themselves.  Corey had
selected a couple of bottles of Chianti to serve with it, the very same
wine I had been going to select, and there was plenty of freshly grated
Parmigiano Reggiano to add.  The only thing they forgot was something to
serve the grated cheese with.
	I was wrong.  To my amazement we all managed to clean up our
plates, although the last few bites seemed to take a little more effort
than the first ones.  We might not have accomplished that except for Dog's
help, but he had been more than willing to offer his assistance in
disposing of any extra food.  All I can say is I hope I don't have to smell
his breath after the amount of garlic bread he ate.  Garlicky dog breath
probably doesn't smell too good.  I hadn't planned on dessert and that was
just as well as no one had any room for it anyway.  After we ate I took
pity on the boys and Kath and I picked up the dishes and cleared the table.
Corey had been very careful with the amount of wine he'd served the boys
and each had only received about two thirds of a glass.  Sometimes he was
inclined to serve himself and the rest of the boys full glasses, but he
must have figured he'd stretched things about as far as he dared with the
leftover Margaritas.  In fact, all the kids were on their best behavior
during dinner.  There was none of the usual gross jokes or talk on subjects
that really weren't appropriate during meals.  Instead they had been models
of decorum.  Now if I could just figure out a way to get them to behave
that way all the time.
	I'd mentioned to Judy that the boys were considering starting some
kind of program for gay kids and she had been very enthusiastic about it.
She also wanted to know if it would be accessible to the kids in Redding as
that was part of the territory she covered.  We adults pretty well let the
kids discuss things, and it was a while before I threw Judy's question out
for them to think about.  That immediately got them thinking even more and
the chatter level really jumped.  Some of the adults were now trying to get
in on the conversation, but I managed to keep them out of it and let the
kids pretty well thrash it out on their own.  After a whole lot of chatter
on their part, the boys agreed that it only seemed reasonable to include
Redding because there were more kids in that area and no one knew of any
programs available to them.  The only problem with that was that they had
no ideas on how to coordinate with anyone in the Redding school district.
After some thought on the subject, they appealed to me on that item.  Since
I didn't have any good ideas I grabbed the phone and gave Judy a call.
	Judy wasn't much help, but she did promise to give it some thought
and she also suggested I might contact some of the teachers I knew who
taught in the schools there.  That left the boys sort of stalled out as to
getting the whole thing going immediately.  Since they were all fired up, I
suggested that they put together their program and that we could have
another meeting in a couple of weeks to finish it up.  Hopefully I would
have some information to provide them with regards to the Redding district.
Now it was time for me to bring up some things they had not discussed.
Among the items I threw out for them to think about was were they willing
to stay home and man it all summer, or did they think they could get a few
others interested so there would always be someone to answer email?  They
shot that down in a hurry by pointing out they had laptops and all they had
to do was access the web from anywhere to run the program.  I was left
wondering how I had overlooked that fact.  Sheesh, I could only think that
my mind sometimes missed the obvious.  They did have a whole bunch of
things they wanted me to check out for them, such as would the school allow
them to post notices on the school web site and would I or other adults be
willing to answer questions provided the writer wanted to correspond with
an adult.  They finally managed to con me into agreeing to write any kid
who wanted an adult to talk with, but I kept insisting that this was their
project and that its success probably depended on keeping adults out of it.
I pointed out that I'd had a hard enough time getting any of them to open
up on the subject and they had to agree with that.
	When I pointed out that they hadn't really been willing to open up
about their sexuality that was the truth.  Talking about themselves was one
of those things which they had been very unwilling to do for the most part.
It had taken me quite a lot of work and time to get them to open up at all
and during their early time with me it was sort of like an elephant in the
room which no one will mention, or the emperor not having any clothes.
Corey had been the only one who was the least bit open, and the rest just
sort of hung their heads and looked down at first.  Over time I'd gotten
them to talk about it and slowly they had started to quit thinking of their
sexuality as something to be ashamed of and started to talk about it and
acknowledge it.  Once started, they had opened up and now it was like there
had never been any problem talking about it.  Still, I wondered why they
normally thought the dinner table was the place to discuss things sexual.
That just somehow seemed wrong to me.  More than once I'd managed to get
something headed down the wrong way because of something one of them had
said, and they seemed to find that the funniest thing in the world.  I'd be
choking and coughing and they would be giggling like a pack of hyenas,
barking away when closing in for a kill.
	As they kept coming up with all those little things for me to do,
Jill suddenly came up with something to think about.  Really, all she said
was it was a shame there wasn't some organization for adults to contact
somewhat like the one the boys were talking about.  Then Kath joined in by
saying that she wished there had been someone she could have talked with
when she first suspected Danny might be gay, and that she had been even
more in need of help and understanding when he had finally told her and her
husband of his sexuality.  I pointed out that there were several such
organizations nationally and if anyone wanted to start a local chapter
there was more than enough information online to learn quite a bit about
such organizations.
	Once again I had opened my mouth and most anyone can figure out
about how things progressed from that point.  The next thing I knew the
boys were dragging all of us into the computer room and insisting I show
everyone.  The computer room is rather small and it was sort of like being
stuffed in a Volkswagen or phone booth.  I was hunched over the keyboard
afraid to raise my head for fear of hitting the chins of everyone peering
over my shoulders.
	I started showing them all the usual suspects, like GSA, GLSEN, and
PFLAG.  I had planned on showing more, but that was more than enough to get
them going.  It soon turned into such a mess with people asking questions
about preceding sites on one side and the others wanting to move on before
some people had even figured out part of what was on the current one.  I
have no idea why the boys were right in the middle of it because they had
way more than enough to organize for themselves, but they were adding to
the confusion in a major way.  I had skinny arms snaking in from nowhere
with fingers pointing at links on the screen, and a couple of times I even
had a hand on top of mine trying to move the mouse.  When the whole thing
had turned into a total mess I finally just closed all the windows and
chased them out of the computer room.  We needed to be much better
organized.  Boys were protesting and whining but after I stared at them
long enough, they ran down and shut up, but kept glaring at me and it
wasn't only the boys I was receiving glares from.
	When it was finally quiet enough for me to be heard I sent the boys
off to get their laptops.  The boys got it immediately and scampered off to
grab their laptops, but I can't say the same for the adults.  It only took
a little bit to explain that we could set the laptops up and have little
groups working at each one.  After all, there were seven computers in the
house and only eleven people to view them.  Even with that many computers
online, the cable internet connection still made it all pretty fast.
	Boys started setting up laptops on any flat surface they could find
and soon various adults were gathered around one or the other of them and
were talking back and forth about just what looked good.  While they were
starting on that, I went and gathered up some steno pads and pencils and
started handing them out.  I finally got everyone's attention and told them
to write down the URL of any site they liked and that way we could find it
again for further investigation.
	I soon realized that I was no longer necessary.  The Sterretts were
gathered around LT and they were looking at something he had found; Danny
was looking over Mark's shoulder and they were chattering away; Kath was
asking Corey questions and they were working together; and JJ was busy with
Kyle.  Those two had their computers side by side and were pecking away on
their own while they seemed to be watching the other's screen.  So there I
was with no one paying the least attention to me.  Since there was nothing
to stop me, I went and refilled my coffee cup and sat down in my recliner.
Dog took one look at me and figured it was his turn to get some attention.
Somehow I felt much calmer after spending a few minutes rubbing his belly.
I just seemed to enjoy listening to him groan and seeing his back leg
scratching away at nothing.  I know it's silly, but all those people and
arms trying to get me to go just where it was they wanted had made me
nervous and a few minutes with Dog calmed me down.  He never insisted on me
doing much except for the occasional belly rub.  He didn't whine or pout,
was always glad to see me, and well, what more could you want.  So I
exaggerate and he frequently whined when trying to cadge a bite or two, and
the demands for a belly rub were more than a daily occurrence.  Still, he
just loved us all and appeared grateful for any attention or bites of food.
Two or three belly rubs a day from each of us, along with all the food he
could beg kept him happy.  I knew my life would be much easier if only the
boys were as easy to take care of as Dog.  I snickered to myself as that
thought crossed my mind, and Dog just gave another groan.  Life would be so
simple if I could just buy big sacks of dry food for the boys and give them
a belly rub now and then.  I couldn't help but giggle some more over that
thought and Dog gave me a sort of strange look when I did so.
	I had just finished with Dog when people started trying to drag me
over to look at what they had found.  Naturally everyone had focused on
something different and the whole thing wasn't making much sense to me.
One second I was looking at a PFLAG site and the next a GSA site.  It was
time to organize the troops.  I finally got them to listen for just a
minute and explained that tonight was not the night to try to make
decisions and that everyone should just jot down what they saw that looked
interesting.  Then we would make a list of all the URL's and give everyone
a copy of it.  When we held our next meeting we could go over what everyone
had found and start to figure out what we wanted to do.  I was almost
shocked when they all agreed and tore back to the computers and were busy
writing down URL's.
	That took them longer than it should have, but eventually I had a
bunch of sheets of paper with all kinds of URL's scribbled on them.  A
quick scan and I soon realized that many of them were just pages of the
main sites so it didn't take me long to sort the whole thing into a list
form that really only covered five main sites plus several sites that were
link sites.  After I had it all organized, it was easy to print out some
copies and hand everyone one.  Then I suggested they each look over the
sites and make notes on what they liked about each one of the programs, but
also to make sure to jot down anything they disliked.  When we got together
again in a couple of weeks we could go over what everyone had found and
then figure out what to do.
	Somehow the whole thing had taken far longer than I had thought it
would and it was now past boy bedtime.  When everyone had their copies of
the list and we'd all talked it over a little, the Sterretts headed home
and we closed up and headed for bed.  I managed to hug each of the boys and
tell them how good the dinner had been.  While they had already received
many compliments on the dinner, the boys just seemed to beam when I hugged
them and told them how proud I was of them.  They tried to brush it off,
but still they sort of bounced off to bed where they had been yawning and
just kind of shuffling seconds before.
	The morning was going pretty well.  I'd had a cup of coffee and
glanced at the paper before anyone showed up to bother me.  Of course I
soon had boys looking longingly at the kitchen so I headed out to fix
breakfast.  I had a treat in store for them this morning.
	I started by setting up to poach eggs.  Corey picked up on it
almost immediately and his eyes started sparkling.  Of course the English
muffins might have helped as there were two packages of them on the
counter, but when he saw the butter melting he was sure.  Breakfast would
be Eggs Benedict.  The reason for that was that yesterday Downie's had had
some really good-looking Canadian bacon and I just couldn't resist buying
some.  Since Rob had gone to work there they were now curing their own and
it was much better than what you normally found in most supermarkets.
	I got some boys helping me because in order for this to all come
together I wouldn't be able to handle it by myself, but with Kyle cooking
the hash browns, and JJ having taken over poaching the eggs, it was easy.
About all I had to do was make the Hollandaise sauce.  I did have to get
Mark toasting the muffins and that left LT to lightly sauté the Canadian
bacon.  Corey finished up the orange squeezing and set the table so things
were really under control.  Kath was almost dumbfounded at the way the boys
all pitched in and seemed to know just what to do.  I wasn't surprised as
we'd done this often enough to where the boys knew just what to do to help.
The only real problem was that there was only so much room around the stove
and we were pretty crowded, but we were getting pretty good at dodging
elbows.
	When the sauce was done, we started assembling the Eggs Benedict
and Corey packed the first plate over to Kath.  After that it went pretty
fast and soon we were all pigging out on almost straight calories.  I knew
there are many things we could have eaten that would be considered much
more healthy, but I tried to fix some meals that were more approved by the
fitness crowd and then periodically threw all the rules out and just dove
into calories and enjoyed them.  After all, five days a week on things like
oatmeal, or Cream of Wheat, or some other hot cereal was enough.
	While the boys were picking up the kitchen I took a few minutes to
glance at some of the material Jerry had handed me last Friday.  Good Lord,
he had given me all kinds of printouts on everything about the school
district so I could answer any questions that might come up during my
appearance at the hearing.  It would have helped if we knew just what it
was the committee was going to cover, but since we didn't Jerry and the
district offices had come up with everything they could think of.  It would
take me weeks to become familiar enough with all of it to discuss it
without referring to it.  I had all kinds of test results running through
my mind as I got ready for church.  At least our district was doing well
and had improved its scores a little every year for the last three years.
	After church it was time for Kath to learn what it was we did at
the gun club.  I wasn't sure just how this would go, but we were soon going
to find out.  Off we went to the gun club with Kath driving her car and
hauling a couple of boys and the rest of us were in the pickup.
	You talk about hovering, that is about all I can say regarding the
way Kath acted.  I mean she was glued so tight to Danny and me that it was
almost as if she was part of us.  I finally finished getting Danny's gun
adjusted and then pulled my usual stunt of renting a trap so we could work
on his shooting without being disturbed.  I finally pried Kath out of my
back pocket and had Corey run the bug while I demonstrated a little.  I
tried to slow every action down and exaggerate it enough to where Danny
would be able to see just what it was I was doing with the predictable
results of missing about half of the targets I shot at.  I explained each
part of the motion and finally when I thought he understood it, I went
ahead and shot ten targets at regular speed.  I smoked the ten and suddenly
he was all eager again.  He had been awfully disappointed when I was only
breaking about half of them.
	Since Danny had flinched when he shot in Los Angeles, I pulled a
dirty trick.  I'd hand him the gun and he had no idea if I had put a shell
in it or not, only that I'd done something and then closed the action while
I was turned away from him.  The first few targets the gun was empty and he
about fell on his nose when the shotgun didn't go off.  When he finally got
to where he wasn't reacting to just pulling the trigger I started mixing in
a shell part of the time.  The first time I put a shell in he was really
startled and flinched badly the next shot, but after a while he admitted
that it didn't hurt and he was mainly just not used to it.  After three
boxes of shells he was starting to hit a few so I reloaded the trap and
then got all the boys lined up on the sixteen yard line so they could shoot
a practice round.  The trap held plenty of clay targets for six shooters
even if there normally were only five shooting at one time.
	By now Kath had started to calm down a little and was enjoying
watching Danny.  She no longer was crowded up so close that I felt like she
was attached to me.  When Danny looked like he was in need of a break, I
sent the boys off to the clubhouse to get some soft drinks and I turned and
went after Kath, telling her if Danny could do it, so could she.  At first
she was very reluctant, but finally I talked her into it.
	Sheer shock would be the only way to describe my reaction to her
shooting attempt.  I had never seen anyone without experience do as well.
I mean it was just almost a miracle. Kath hit twelve targets of her second
twenty-five and was starting to grin at my open hanging mouth.  Not only
that, she was now eager to prove she could learn to shoot just as well as
anyone else.  While she still needed some work on form, she appeared
hooked.
	The boys had come back and were watching her second round of
practice and Danny was grinning so wide his face looked like it was all
teeth.  I spent the rest of the afternoon coaching and manning the bug for
Kath and the boys as they shot.  They went through almost two cases of
ammunition or just under a thousand rounds before they finally gave up.
Kath was really disappointed that she didn't seem to improve much more.  I
kept trying to tell her that as she became more accustomed to visually
picking the targets up she would improve, and when several other shooters
kept telling her the same thing she finally accepted that maybe, just maybe
it would take a little time and practice to get good at shooting.  If she
hadn't kept scoring in the ten to thirteen target range I would have said
that second round was a fluke and let it go at that, but clearly Kath had
very good hand eye coordination and had paid a lot more attention when I
was working with Danny than I thought she had.  She was already much better
than any of the boys had been after several lessons, and she seemed very
pleased when I told her so.  In fact, she just kind of glowed from that
statement leading me to believe that she had never received many
compliments.
	I really wasn't in the mood to cook, or even all that hungry owing
to the rich breakfast and a few nibbles after church, so we stopped at
Downie's and picked up a couple of those humongous deli sandwiches that
must have everything known to man in them.  I mean there are all kinds of
luncheon meats and cheeses and there must be the output of a couple of
acres of garden in there also, and it's all put in a big loaf of French
bread split down the middle.  Those suckers have to be at least six inches
wide and over four inches thick and they are well over three feet long.  I
figured those, along with the leftover clam chowder would fill the boys up.
There might even be enough for Kath and me to have a few bites.  When we
got home I put the chowder on to slowly heat and the boys got out the
cleaning kits and started in on the shotguns and by the time the chowder
was hot they had the guns cleaned and put away.  We teased Kath about being
another Annie Oakley and she actually looked somewhat smug.
	Danny was still almost beside himself with excitement over learning
to shoot, but the rest of the boys were used to it and couldn't understand
why he was so excited.  How quickly they forgot because I could remember
when they were just as excited.  I debated about reminding them of that
little fact, but it seemed rather pointless as I was sure I would just get
a rather blank look and maybe even some protests that I didn't know what I
was talking about because they had never been that excited.
	There was a little over half of one of the sandwiches left, but I
was willing to bet it would never see the coming dawn what with six hungry
boys and the need for bedtime snacks.  Anyhow it was time for me to get
organized for tomorrow.  The meeting was supposed to start at 9:00 a.m. and
it would take a little over three hours to drive there, with traffic maybe
three and a half.  The more I thought about it, the worse an idea it seemed
to get up that early and drive down so finally I gathered up all the papers
Jerry had given me, along with my laptop and some clean clothes, and left.
That way I would not have to worry about being there on time.  As I headed
out I suddenly realized just how great it was to have Kath to watch over
the boys if something came up.  It was also kind of nice to have a little
free time to think about what to get JJ for his birthday.  I knew that LT
had managed to order and pay for a bracelet similar to, but not identical
to the one JJ had given him, and the other boys had managed to pick up a
few things while we were picking up clothes for Danny on our way to
Disneyland, but I still hadn't come up with any ideas or gifts yet.  I had
been busy getting clothes for Danny and hadn't had time to sneak off and
find anything back then.  Maybe the hearing would be short enough to where
I could do a little shopping before heading home.  I still couldn't figure
out why it was that I was getting involved because I had no explanation for
how they even knew about me.  Maybe they just put all the teachers' names
in a hat and mine was the unlucky name which had been drawn.
	The drive went nicely and I made good time.  There was a Quality
Inn not too far from where I needed to be so I had called and made
reservations and since I was familiar with Sacramento I had no trouble
finding it.  However, it had taken me longer to get there than I had
thought it would so I could only be thankful I had decided to drive down
and stay the night rather than make the drive in the morning.  I could just
picture myself being a little late and fighting the traffic.  By the time I
got there and checked in I was tired, so after arranging a wake-up call I
fell into bed.  Not having Corey beside me made it very hard to fall
asleep.  This was the first time in a long time I had not had the scent of
him to lull me to sleep and I thrashed around for much longer than usual
before finally drifting off.  The room was very nice and the bed was
comfortable, but I didn't have my Corey beside me and I just felt lost
somehow.
	I certainly didn't need to leave a wake-up call.  It wasn't my
bladder that bothered me, only the lack of Corey.  I was awake long before
the call was due so I fidgeted around the room, took my shower, fidgeted
some more, and finally had breakfast.  During breakfast I tried to make
more sense of all the information that Jerry and crew had supplied, and I
did manage to get it in good enough order to where I could find the
information in it, but there was no way to memorize all of it.  I finally
just gave up and checked out and headed for the Capital Building.  I could
sit over there and do my fidgeting.
	I arrived forty-five minutes before the hearing was scheduled to
start and was shown to a room where I continued trying to become more
familiar with the mass of paperwork from the school.  In approximately a
half hour people started arriving, and when I noticed who some of them were
I started thinking that my being there was not a good idea.  A couple of
them were very high-ranking members of the union and there were several of
the top people from the Board of Education.  I could see I was way out of
my league and as I continued worrying about that I started wondering if I
had done something wrong and they were going to quiz me about it.  I'd been
wound up enough since I woke up and seeing all the big shots only made it
worse.
	Just before the hearing was supposed to start the members of the
committee began filing in and much to my shock one walked right over to me
and started thanking me for attending.  It took me a couple of seconds, but
suddenly it all clicked into place.  Rep. Jon Philson had been at the
dinner party at the restaurant in the Castro district and he had been one
of the ones I had been explaining all the failures of the education system
to that evening.  Then I discovered Jon was the chairman of the committee
and was the one who had requested my testimony.  The hearing got started
before I had time to figure out how I felt about that.
	If you've seen any of those silly hearings held by Congress on
C-Span you know about how it started.  After all the flowery introductions
were made things got underway with the speeches from the union reps and the
Board of Education members.  They called them opening statements and I
didn't have one because I hadn't known they were expected.  Those opening
statements were too long and very boring.  Those of us who were testifying
were seated at a long table and I was on one end.  The opening statements
started at the other end and then moved to the next person in line.  That
meant I would have been the last to speak if I had prepared any remarks.
Slowly each person in line finished his or her prepared remarks and
eventually they worked all the way down the table to me.  I was then called
upon and could only tell them that I had no opening remarks as I had not
known I needed them and had only come with the intent of answering any
questions I could.  That produced some grins from the committee members and
some scowls from those I was seated with.  After that we finally got down
to business, if that is what you would call it.
	The first item brought up for discussion was the complaints about
the testing of students with the predictable speeches from the union and
board of education members about how terrible they were, and how they
didn't help any with teaching, and how they occupied valuable time better
spent on teaching, and how they were unfair to the students and teachers
alike, and it went on and on.  In a lot of cases they didn't come right out
and say how bad they thought the testing was, but instead they sort of
circled all around it and kept throwing little jabs at it as though they
were trying to give the testing the death of ten thousand little arguments
rather than one big logical argument.  They didn't really say testing was
bad, only that there wasn't sufficient class time to prepare the students
for such tests and cited surveys which told how many hours were lost
outside of the hours it took for the students to actually take the test.  I
could only think that those hours must represent time the teachers spent
helping the students cram for the tests.  I seemed to remember something
asking about that on one of the forms in my mailbox and obviously the
zero's I'd put in all those little boxes didn't drag the average down far
enough based on the figures being quoted about lost study time.  What they
were saying was that this so called preparation time cut into the time that
should be spent teaching the subject, but what they meant was they hated
the testing and were doing all in their power to let everyone know it
without actually saying so.  Eventually they all ran out of words and I was
now the only one left who hadn't said a word on the subject.  The worst
part of the whole thing was that all who had spoken had said much the same
things in their opening statements and it was like they were trying to wear
everyone down with the sheer number of words and not with reasonable
arguments.  Then Cm. Philson asked me if I agreed with what had been said
to this point, and not only that, he was smirking much like some of the
kids do when they try to stick me with a loaded question.  He knew just how
I felt about the subject as he had heard me shoot my mouth off on it once
already.
	"No," I answered unequivocally.  I don't think that was quite the
answer anyone expected.
	"What parts of it don't you agree with?" he followed up, still
smirking.
	"Pretty much all of it."
	I swear if I had dropped a drunken orgy in the middle of a
religious convention the looks I got from those at the same table where I
was sitting wouldn't have been much different.  Everything from looks of
shock to glares of outright hostility were directed my way.  However, the
committee members seemed to perk right up and start paying attention.
	"Perhaps you'd like to explain."  He was still smirking.
	I was stuck.  I simply had to go ahead and explain my reasoning.
	"I'll be happy to Mr. Chairman.  To start with, only by testing can
we find out if the instruction has been effective.  Testing measures two
things, the students grasp of the subject, and the teacher's ability to
teach it.  While I am perfectly willing to admit that there are some flaws
in the current testing methods, those flaws should be fixed and if anything
there should be more testing.  Now I've heard reasons why students fail
such tests, and that they penalize students who are not good at exams, but
in the end life itself is a test.  We would never dream of granting
drivers' licenses to those who could not pass a driving test and I see no
reason to think that student achievement should be treated differently.  If
we get rid of all the tests, how then will we know that the students are
proficient in the subject?  Certainly not from grading because it has been
shown that some schools give higher marks for the same level of
achievement.  One only needs look at the data from things like the SAT
tests and our present testing system to figure that out.
	"I've also heard this morning that too much time is spent trying to
teach students to pass the state tests, and not enough on instruction.  If
that is the case, then the student is being shortchanged.  Certainly
students need to learn how to take tests, and in my classroom I do teach
some of that, but that is not the way I teach the subject, and very little
time is spent on teaching how to take tests and none at all on how to pass
the statewide tests on the subjects I teach.  Instead I spend my time
trying to make sure the students actually understand the subject, and if
they do, they will be successful on the tests.  Now not everyone will be
successful, but the class as a whole will be successful.  I teach in a
middle school so that is the only reason I spend any time instructing on
taking tests.  If I taught in high school, well, if the student hasn't
learned how to take tests by the time he or she reaches high school, then I
would probably get that student aside and work with him or her individually
on taking tests, but I would not devote class time to it.
	"I would submit that if you look at the test scores from my
district you will find that our students do quite well in the tests, and I
would further state that our school district does not make a big deal out
of the state tests, but instead stresses learning the subjects and letting
the chips fall where they may.  Based on the results, I would have to say
it is working for us, and without logical arguments to the contrary, I see
no reason why it should not be the same everywhere.  This is not to say
that all school districts will score the same because in our district there
is less of the abject poverty which some districts have to contend with,
but I do think that good instruction on the part of the teachers will help
overcome some of that.  While it is true that students whose parents stress
education do better than those whose parents don't, still with proper
instruction the gap can be narrowed and when we fail to try to narrow that
gap and are only teaching students to pass tests, then it is we who are the
failures and not the students.  They are only the victims.  In the end,
without testing we have no idea if we are doing our jobs or not.  Only
through testing can we discover which students have learned the material
and which have not.
	"Yes we can raise some test scores by spending a lot of time
fiddling around and working only on passing tests, but if you change the
questions a little you soon find out that the students don't really know
the subject, only how to answer those questions they were prepped for.  We
need to quit spending our time trying to teach the students to take tests
and instead teach the subject so they understand it.  If the class
understands the subject, as a whole the class will succeed if the tests are
fair."
	As you can pretty well guess I set off a real firestorm with those
remarks.  Those at my table looked at me like I had pulled down my pants
and taken a dump right in the middle of the room.  Those on the committee
seemed divided, and in the questioning that followed it was apparent that
some of the members of the committee were playing to the unions and some
were not.  It got so bad that in one instance I told one of the committee
members that if he would ask a question rather than just make wild
accusations, I would attempt to answer it, but that just because he had
been elected to office that didn't give him the right to be disrespectful
of anyone.  Much gaveling by Cm. Philson followed that outburst and he
instructed that committee member to be polite.  It was getting downright
ugly and I had put up with about all of it I was willing to withstand when
I did that.  In fact Chairman Philson called a break to let tempers cool a
little after that.
	I don't know why I had done it, but I had a little Sony digital
recorder that I frequently carried in class to tape my lectures and then
see if they made sense when I played them back.  I always used it when
counseling so I could review everything and see if I needed to speak with
the student at a later date and add something I'd missed the first time,
and I also used it to make notes to myself.  Like a lot of other things I
did, I was used to having it tucked into my jacket pocket and I suppose I
had turned it on so I could review everything I said during the meeting.
I'd been packing one since college when I used it to help with the note
taking so it was just a part of me and I had stuck it in my jacket pocket
just like I was getting ready to go teach.
	Well anyhow, as I was getting a cup of coffee one of the committee
members, in fact the same one who had gotten nasty with me, came up and
told me he was going to get me fired because of the way I had answered him.
Then Idiot (he doesn't deserve a name) even told me he would see I never
had another job and starved to death.
	I suppose I shouldn't have laughed at him, but the thought of not
having a job causing me to starve to death was sort of funny.  Needless to
say that laughter did nothing for his state of mind.  It probably didn't
help when I told him if he tried it that I would see him in jail for it,
and with that he stalked off.
	About that time Representative Philson came up and asked what I
thought of the hearing so far.
	"Well, it has been interesting but I didn't realize threatening
people was part of what would happen," I told him.
	"What the hell are you talking about?" he asked me, his grin now
gone and a look of real intensity on his face.
	So I just fished the little recorder out of my pocket and played
the last few minutes back for him.  First he turned sort of ashen, and then
he got red in the face and stormed off.  I was just finishing my cup of
coffee when back he came with Idiot in tow.  Now Idiot just didn't seem to
know when to keep his mouth shut.  I mean he was blustering about the
recorder when he should have been worrying about what it was he had said.
Anyhow, Rep. Philson told him that if he was very lucky he would apologize
to me and never ever try to do anything against me because then maybe I
wouldn't give that recording to the media because if that recording ever
made it on the news, his political career and possibly his freedom would be
over.  There was some more bluster, but after a while they moved away from
me and I don't know what was said.  After a while Idiot came back and gave
a very grudging apology which I accepted.
	Finally the hearing got back underway and we moved on, at least we
were supposed to move on.  However Idiot just couldn't let well enough
alone.  When it came his turn to question, he was sarcastic and disdainful
towards me.  It wasn't long before everyone in the room, including the
couple of reporters covering the hearing, knew that something was going on.
Instead of being sarcastic back, I went to great lengths to sort of fawn
over him and his questions, which didn't improve his attitude in the least.
One thing that seemed to bring about was that others on the committee were
now throwing me more of what could be termed softball questions than they
had before.  Apparently they weren't very pleased with Idiot's performance
and were trying to make up for it.
	Finally it was time to break for lunch.  Before I could begin to
get out of there Rep. Philson grabbed me and insisted on taking me to
lunch.  He dragged me past the two reporters who appeared trying to get to
me to ask me questions and out the door before I had time to realize just
what was happening.
	Lunch was excellent, but then I suppose if you spend a lot of the
time in an area you learn where the best places are to eat.  We ended up in
a little restaurant which I didn't even know existed and several other
committee members were there as well.  During lunch they assured me I had
nothing to worry about from Idiot and that if anything did come up I should
just contact any of them and they would see that it was taken care of.
Once they had assured me of that, they turned to asking questions about
some of the things likely to come up and they were acting like they wanted
to know, not just parroting the usual stances you frequently hear
politicians take.  The questions seemed genuine and there was quite a bit
of discussion about some of my answers.  On some points they seemed to
agree with me and on others they didn't.  They even pointed out a few
things I hadn't thought about and those points made a lot of difference in
how I thought about a couple of topics.  By the time lunch was over we were
in agreement on more things than we were in disagreement over.
	On the way back to the hearing I was told that the party whip of
Idiot's party had been asked to have a talk with him and wise him up.  It
must have worked because he was much more civil during the afternoon
session.
	In fact the afternoon session was sort of anti-climatic.  People
seemed to have calmed down and it was a much more reasonable discussion
about the whole subject.  Surprisingly I did find that more and more of the
questions were directed towards me as the afternoon wore on.  What I wasn't
prepared for was having the hearing carried over till tomorrow and when
asked if I would be able to attend, I had to make a quick call to Jerry and
ask him if it was possible.  With that taken care of I was told to be ready
to resume at 9:00 a.m. tomorrow.  Jeez, what a day.  It looked like I had
managed to make more than enough enemies in high places to last me a
lifetime.
	The problem now was I had another night to spend in Sacramento and
I hadn't really planned on being here that long.  I headed off to the mall
to buy a new shirt and a few items so I would look presentable tomorrow.  I
found a lovely light blue shirt that would go with my jacket, and an even
better tie to match it.  That taken care of, it was time to see just what
it was I could find for JJ's birthday.  I settled on an iPod.  I remembered
the boys looking at them and drooling a while back and it looked like it
should fill the bill.  I'd called the Quality Inn up as soon as I knew I
was staying over and they told me they had rooms available so I wasn't
worried about a place to stay.  By now it was well after my normal
dinnertime so I hunted up a place to eat.
	After eating I called home to see how things were going.  Good
Lord, I learned I had been on the news.  The boys had flipped the TV on
when they got home and there I was, testifying before the committee.  I had
to fill them in a little on how that had gone and that Representative
Philson was the one who had requested me.  I reminded them they had met him
at the dinner which produced the comment that they thought he looked
familiar.  They giggled when I told them of him dragging me out of the room
past the press so they couldn't interview me, twice.  In fact when the
hearing was adjourned for the day he had taken me out the back entrance to
keep me away from the reporters, telling me I didn't really need to get
cornered by them.  The way they had eyed me when we left for lunch I was
thankful he did.  Those looks had made me feel somewhat like a piece of
meat thrown into shark-infested waters.  I could almost see them smacking
their lips as they tried to figure out just what they could get me to say.
	Sometimes speakerphones are great, but I really wanted to tell
Corey how much I was missing him and with all the boys listening in I
didn't feel comfortable doing so.  We batted the breeze a few minutes and I
got filled in how practice had gone and finally we said goodbye and I hung
up.
	I spent the rest of the evening reviewing what I had said at the
hearing and transferring the contents of the recorder to the laptop.  When
I could put if off no longer, I went to bed by myself and finally managed
to fall asleep.  I was really lonesome.


			To be continued...


	Cooking class is going to be short.  Omelets are quick and easy and
can be eaten at most any meal.  You can add all kinds of things to them and
some I like are nice fresh sautéed asparagus, various sea foods like shrimp
or crab, and all kinds of other things.  Just let your imagination be your
guide.  You can top them with all kinds of sauces from salsa to
Hollandaise.  Just don't overcook them as they become dry and tough.  The
center should still be slightly runny when you finish cooking it as it will
firm up from the heat on the outside of it while you are cooking the next
one.  For a three-egg omelet, a ten-inch pan is about right.  You don't
want a very thick layer of beaten eggs in the pan to cook them this way.
The technique for forming the omelets is to give a quick jerk on the pan
and then smoothly slide it back, followed by another quick jerk and keep
doing that until it sort of rolls up in one bundle on the far side of the
pan.  You need a true sauté pan for doing it and a common frying pan
doesn't work well as the sides are too steep and the corners too sharp.
Most of the nonstick cookware you see normally has sauté pans.  A true
frying pan has higher sides and less rounded corners.  A typical sauté pan
might be ten inches across the top and only have an eight inch flat part on
the bottom, where a ten-inch frying pan will likely have over nine inches
of the bottom flat.  Truthfully I buy cheap ones from Costco and figure on
throwing them away every couple of years when the nonstick coating starts
to fail.  The last time I bought any, a three pack of sauté pans was just
over twenty bucks and consisted of an eight-inch, a ten-inch, and a
twelve-inch pan.  The one I use for omelets I've been using for over twelve
years but that is all I use it for and it was just a cheap pan to start
with.  I've got some good pans, but for many things those cheap ones work
just as well.  It depends on what I'm cooking on which pan I'll grab.  If I
want some fond to make a sauce, then I use the stainless, or I do have one
big cast iron frying pan.  If I don't need any fond, then the cheap
nonstick ones are easy to clean and take care of.
	As for learning to use spices, what I described in the story is
just what I did when I had to learn to cook.  I started out with a big
batch of spaghetti sauce that only contained the meat and tomatoes and took
small amounts of it in a little saucepan and started adding things.  When I
got too much of one thing, I got some more of the sauce and tried another
seasoning.  You do have to let it cook for a few minutes with some of them
like garlic or onions, but by only over spicing a small amount with one
spice, you can see how it works, and then when you are done experimenting
you can dump it all back together and bring the whole thing up a spice at a
time.  Now I'll admit that Mom had told me a little, but her batches and
mine were different sized and so I had to learn how much to use pretty much
on my own.  Mom seemed to think that with a lot of things, a list of
ingredients should be enough to make it and I have several of her recipes
that only contain such a list.  In the end, mine is somewhat different than
hers was because I like it different.
	As for the Eggs Benedict, the only thing at all difficult is the
Hollandaise sauce and that isn't all that difficult.  However, if you start
reading cookbooks you will soon think it is.  Every recipe is different and
each gives different directions.  I started out making it the hard way in a
double boiler and using clarified butter.  That makes an excellent
Hollandaise and you will get no complaints from me should you make it that
way.  Still, I'm a lazy person and that just seemed like a lot of work and
I never seemed to have any clarified butter on hand so I rarely made it.
Then I was taught a neat little trick.  The whole thing is real simple if
you just don't get mired in the details.  Now this works best if you have a
saucier, which is a fancy saucepan for making sauces in.  It has a rounded
bottom so the whisk doesn't miss the corners like it does in a regular
saucepan.  If you don't have a saucier, then you can use a stainless steel
bowl like I did for a long time and just move it on and off the heat to
control how fast it heats.  And if you happen to have a hand mixer with a
whisk attachment, that works even better because it is easier.  Just turn
it on a semi-slow speed and keep moving it around in the pan so you get
everything well whisked.  After I was shown the easy way to make it, I made
it in a stainless steel bowl for a long time before I got a saucier.
Anyhow, the recipes all call for egg yolks, lemon juice, and butter.  The
old fashioned way says you start out with your egg yolks in the double
boiler and with the water in the bottom just simmering, you whisk away
until the eggs yolks start to thicken and then add a tablespoon or so of
hot water and keep whisking.  You do that about three or four times before
you slowly add the warm clarified butter, and the lemon juice goes in last.
What a drag.  So what I now do is take my saucier and put in on low heat
and start my butter melting in it.  I no longer use clarified butter but
just use it as you buy it.  While that is happening I separate my eggs and
add the lemon juice to the egg yolks and beat the yolks and lemon juice
together.  When the butter is melted I start whisking it and adding the
yolk mixture in a thin stream and keep whisking.  On my stove I use just
between low and medium low for heat.  Don't give up and pretty soon it will
start to thicken.  When it seems almost as thick as you want it, pull it
off the heat and continue whisking for another thirty seconds or so.  If
using a stainless steel bowl, keep whisking until it is as thick as you
want the finished product.  Unless you are making a large quantity of the
sauce, the residual heat from the saucier will cause it to thicken slightly
after you remove it from the heat.  And there you have it.
	Now for proportions in the recipe.  Per egg yolk you use two scant
tablespoons of lemon juice, and three to four tablespoons of butter.  A
quarter pound of butter is eight tablespoons so I never measure real close
and instead just round off to the nearest half stick.  For example, if
making Hollandaise for four people for Eggs Benedict I will use four yolks,
somewhere between one and one half to two sticks of butter.  Now I say
somewhere because if a stick has a little used off of it, I just go ahead
and use it.  And of course that would call for roughly eight tablespoons of
lemon juice.  Now if I happen to have any on hand I like to use half lemon
juice and half lime juice, but I don't normally have limes on hand so I use
about a third vinegar in place of an equal amount of the lemon juice.  It
gives it slightly more tartness (perhaps brightness is a better word) and I
happen to like it that way.  You can also use white wine vinegar in place
of some or all of the lemon juice.  If you are using salted butter, add a
pinch of salt, if unsalted butter about a half teaspoon.  I also add a few
grinds of white pepper, but if you don't mind the black specks use black
pepper.  The last thing is a generous pinch of cayenne.  Just whisk them
all into the egg yolks before adding to the melted butter.
	Now if it takes much over five minutes of whisking you need to use
a little higher heat, and you don't want your butter very hot to start with
because if it is too hot you will have scrambled egg yolks swimming in
butter and not Hollandaise sauce.  I gauge the butter by sticking my finger
in it and when it is almost hot enough to burn me, I start.  Leave your
finger in a couple of seconds when checking or you might get the butter a
little to hot to start with.  If you sauce ends up slightly too thick,
whisk in a couple of tablespoons of cream, one at a time, and see if that
thins it enough.  It should and I've never had to do more than that.
	You can do many things with Hollandaise like add one to two
tablespoons of Dijon mustard to it and serve poached salmon with a spoonful
on top.  You can braise or steam vegetables and pour a little Hollandaise
on them.  You can take some dry white wine and some white wine vinegar and
add some shallots and cook them down and use in place of the lemon juice
and you have Béarnaise sauce.  For four egg yolks take about a half cup
each of white wine vinegar and dry white wine and a tablespoon of finally
minced shallot along with ½ teaspoon of dried tarragon and cook them
together until you have about two tablespoons of liquid left and then
strain it and use it in place of the lemon juice.  The last thing to tell
you is my hand mixer is a six-speed model and I run in on number two and
that seems about right.  You have to keep whisking once you start adding
the yolk mixture until it is done.  If you need to keep it warm, pour it in
a bowl and put the bowl over a pan of water that is around 140 degrees.
Make sure the bottom of the bowl is a couple inches above the water.  I've
kept it that way for up to a half hour and only had to whisk it briefly
before serving.  I try to make it just before I need it so I don't have to
try to hold it.
	Hollandaise is a wonderful sauce that absolutely ruins your healthy
diet.  I don't fix it very often, maybe three or four times a year, but I
really enjoy it when I do.